I’m liking this couple more and more.
mo’ an’ mo’
At least he’s a good sibling.
Who has good use of subtext.
Does he know he’s using subtext though?
Don’t use subtext and drive.
He had to be good at *something*, eventually, at some point in his life.
Don’t get maced, Howie
Howie is immediately maced when he leaves.
His car maces him.
With a mace pie?
~~~~~~~~~ is in this?
I think that’s the BEST thing that could happen to him.
you guise might regret y’all said that
keep yr eyes on the road, kiddo……………………………….
Subtext is an anagram for butt sex.
Also tux bets.
And Bus Text!
It’s foreshadowing! Howard is going to get hit by a bus because the driver is texting!
I’m on to you, Willis!
And the driver will be wearing his best tux!
While engaging in butt sex?
His name is Tex Tubs.
Oh… my… god…
The irony. It’s just too brilliant. Too pure.
All I see is more shipp… wait you aren’t supposed to text and drive?
No you dum-dum. All the PSA’s are about it!
What about commenting on DoA while driving? That’s fine, rig
Jackson? What happened? JACKSON? JAAAAACKSOOOOOON!!
Yes. comming on the DoD is also acceptable.
Personally, I think the world needs more PSA’s about the danger of driving while shipping.
Yes….wait, you text and drive?
No, cause I keep failing the written test for some reason. Who is gonna remember what a “Stop sign” means?
It’s means that you’re not supposed to use hand signals to communicate with deaf people in that area, of course.
They aren’t “Stop” signs. They’re “Pots” signs. It’s where you drop off plant pots and/or pick up potted plants. Strangely, the DMV never gets around to correcting this surprisingly common mistake.
DON’T text and drive! That’s incredibly dangerous!
So is walking around outside with no shoes, but that doesn’t stop millions of people from doing it.
Actually, it stops billions of people outside from walking around without shoes. We shoe-wearers are the vast majority.
Besides, shoe-wearers would target bare-footers and step on their foots…..or so I’ve been told.
It’s also, not particularly dangerous and we barefooters would like you to people to stop making such a fuss about it (or at least have some well supported arguments).
Yes true… but walking around with no shoes generally has negative effects on one person Texting and Driving on the other hand has the potential to negatively effect yourself and group of people.
Hmm… you make a valid point….
Time to disprove you.
A man walks outside barefoot.
This man steps on a pebble.
This man begins to swear, both profusely and quite creatively.
A young girl hears these swears.
She repeats them to her teacher when she fails a geography test.
The mother is called.
The mother washes out the young girl’s mouth with soap.
The girl begins to resent soap everywhere.
The girl grows up and teaches her children that soap is evil.
The children accept the teaching.
The children work together to blow up soap factories using chemically altered soap.
Somewhere someplace someone completely unrelated releases a deadly toxin that can only be destroyed by soap bombs.
The children used all the soap destroying all the soap.
The world dies and curses the man for not wearing shoes.
Always wear shoes. It could save the world from a mad scientist and his soap bomb vulnerable toxin.
This is hilarious, considering who your gravatar is.
This has made me re-examine my life.
This butterfly was *really* effect-ive!
The world’s cursing is overheard by its teacher.
The world’s mother is called.
The mother wants to wash the world’s mouth, but she can’t find any soap because it’s all been blown up, so the world escapes punishment.
Happy ending! So the world praises the man for not wearing shoes.
Hence why I said generally just because scenarios like radical anti soap terrorists or A person steps on a discarded needle that was used on monkeys to test the rage virus thus 28 days later everyone becomes homicidal rage monsters but these scenarios both have a low probability of occurring.
Good point. Remember not to Text and Drive people!
Howard, you are actually likable in this continuity. I feel like my world turned upside down.
What was he like in the other continuity?
He was….. kinda the same, I guess?
Know his first scene where all he does is talk about Game of Thrones and be obnoxious?
Replace GoT with Star Trek and have that be the extent of his personality.
Also he once sexually assaulted Kate Mulgrew.
Hey, I had forgotten about the sexual assault part, thanks for reminding me.
From what I’ve gleaned so far, it seems like the aggregate Character Likeability Index for Dumbing of Age is higher than Willis’ other comics. Which is why I’m sticking with DoA for now.
Seems like the jerkhole parents in this continuity were also jerkholes in the other ones, for the most part. Again, though, I haven’t gone Full Willis so I don’t know for sure.
Actually, Naomi’s a lot better.
…Mostly because we never really see her.
I went Full Willis once.
My back still hasn’t recovered, and the poor woman I tried it with screamed at me for updating the Transformers wiki during.
It’s not really that he was BAD in the other continuity most of the time, but between the time he sexually assaulted Kate Mulgrew and the general dorkiness, it wasn’t a really good time for him.
Generally, he was sort of a mix of DoA Howard’s geekyness and Joyce’s sexual obliviousness
Red is Black, Up is Left!
Peppermint is cinnamon! Deadpool is Ambush Bug!
Bacon is Necktie!
Everything you know is wrong
Black is white, up is down and short is long
And everything you thought was just so
Important doesn’t matter
Dogs and cats living together!
It’s mass hysteria!
I’m going to the store, we’ve used left the black peppers.
Yeah, there aren’t any up.
But since the robbery you’ve been redlisted from the store!
Well, sort of likable, which is still a huge step up.
Given the quantity of requests to see him in this comic, people must’ve liked *something* about him.
I feel like Howard looks too young to drive.
Back when I was a young sprat growing up in Montana, you could get your Learner’s Permit at 14 1/2 and your full license at 15. The foreign exchange students were so glad they got to be in Montana, as they could get an internationally recognized Driver’s License that let them drive long before they could normally be licensed at 18.
Former MT 56 here, what was your number?
What subtex-Oh right, that subtext.
False alarm everyone, the alt text still makes sense.
Don’t worry, I’m sure that they will be checking out each others’ plumbing.
“I know, you’re a girl who’s been getting nothing but dirty breaks. Well, we can clean and tighten your brakes, but you’ll have to stay in the garage all night.”
Your both high maintenance!!!
Ruth needs to be maintained all night, every-night, you’ve got a lot of work to do Billie get started now.
Yeah Howard, don’t want to get hit by a truck or something…
We don’t want you swerving off the road…
“And if you do anything to hurt her, I will find you and I will kill you…good luck.”
I have a set of certain skills. All useless.
But killing’s easy if you’re pushed too hard.
Mostly just the skill to spend 38 convective hours listing all the reasons you should watch the game of thrones.
He will tie you to a chair and force you to listen. Seven times a week.
The first 30 are naked boobs.
Everyone loves boobs. Yes, even boobs.
All part of the boob cycle.
Why oh Why do I have a bad feeling about where this arc is going (not to mention Howard)?
Hopefuly not like in waj
It makes much more sense reading it rather than listening. I always heard it as “Hands on AT ten and two”. Frankly, it made traveling inconvenient.
I tend to have mine at 9 and 3.
I used 10 and 2 when my car didn’t have an airbag in the steering wheel.
lots and lots of sexy maintenance
Poor Howard didn’t even get to see GoT.
It’s 9 and 3 now, actually, because of airbags.
I always heard it was 2 and 7… or was it 3 and 7?
I use 5 and 5. Because I’m just a crazy rebel.
I prefer hands at 10, 2 and 4…..but that’s only when I’m driving and drinking Dr. Pepper.
My parents always told me 10 and 2, drove like that for a year with my learners permit, went to drivers ed and got Screwed OVER.
Funny, never got that memo, and moved from a car with a plain wheel to an airbag about 8 years ago now.
So what exactly happens, does the inflating cushion that’s supposed to stop you crunching your skull against the dashboard take your arm off or something?
What if you’re in the middle of trying to steer and swerve around a sudden obstacle (someone cutting into your lane, say) when it goes off, so you’re actually at 11.30 and 5.30?
I call shenanigans.
No, it doesn’t take your arm off – just your skin. I believe the word used was “deglove.”
That last panel could be the movie poster for the film about Ruth and Billie. Title… maybe “Love Drunk”?
Shouldn’t it be “Drunk Love”?
Or “Sober Love”
A Lessick and a car? For some reason, my “something’s bad is going to happen” sense is on red alert.
aww man did we really have to go there
Yeah. Somewhere back in their family tree, one of Ruth’s ancestors must have fucked Henry Ford and never called him in the morning, or something.
I realy wish I could like this comment.
Anyone else remembering chekhov’s dead end sign?
That’s reassuring. BTW, how do you put GIFs in?
By having a URL and some HTML tags.
Of course you would NEVER tell us how!
Honestly, that’s probably for the best. Given such power we would doubtlessly abuse it.
Yeah I kno! Lol
I just liked to think it’s willis saying…
“Look at What I can do!…bet you wish you could do this!
(hope this works)
“Given such power we would doubtlessly abuse it”?
I don’t understand your combination of these words.
If we were shown how to post them we’d post so many it would ruin the forums.
Lieutenant Dan is not being clueless; he’s making a (very funny) reference to the current SP.
I just did tell you how! There is no more additional information!
I think there’s also “be a moderator”. I’m pretty sure img tags get filtered otherwise.
Well, he just answered “how do *you* put GIFs in?”, not “how do *I* put GIFs in?” …
It’s right there under the comment entry box. Srsly. Hit reply and then cast your eyes downwards by all of about 100 pixels.
Or you could always try let me google that for you
how do you like them apples
*gets this far down the comment*
… wait, it doesn’t actually say anything about images.
Let me try a regular HTML img tag, if I can remember how to do them from my geocities/notepad days.
y’all suck …did it work?
oh god so many tags
That’d be a no, HAL.
How about now?
If that appears, my first method (HTML Img Src) was the right one.
If THAT appears, my second method (forum style img-URL-/img tagging) worked.
If the picture appears, but in a different place to either of those, then the third method worked (putting the URL in the “website” box under name and email)
Nope. It’s presumably some kind of blog-owner magic, then.
I’d like to point out that he hasn’t ruled out the possibility of coma.
Love that episode.
“Look at you, grinning like you’re Father Christmas.”
“Who says I’m not redbicyclewhenyouweretwelve?”
The last 10 minutes are absolutely wonderful.
Then Torchwood made a series where literally everybody lived. Horrific stuff.
Oh god, yes. I like to describe Torchwood like this:
“Imagine the Doctor Who universe… except now imagine that instead of being a crazy-smart immortal alien with a time machine and a conquer-all-locks-and-electronics wand, you’re basically just a bunch of dudes and ladies with computers and rifles.”
Especially Ruth’s parents! (They’re lurking somewhere, waiting for just the right moment to jump out and yell ‘Surprise!’.)
Actually not. Everybody dies and the universe slowly succumbs to entropy.
Love it! The comments were starting to worry me . . .
But if everyone lives that’s no fun! Gotta kill one or two to keep us guessing.
Ruth just because your parents died in car accident doesn’t mean the same will happen to Howard, the states he’s much more likely to get shot.
Not true, in the US in 2011 (last year I could find statistics for both) there were 35K people killed with motor vehicles, and only 30K killed with guns. I cover that people killed with motor vehicles beat as my job.
The fact that it’s fairly close together is worrying. That and the number of either in a country of 250~300 million.
Over here, if the gun crime stats matched road accidents to within about 15%, or either was proportionally as high (it’s about 3500 fatal RTAs within 60~70 million; not sure of the firearm deaths but if it’s no more than a couple hundred, if not in the tens), there’d be uproar.
Come to Compton. Its terrible here.Shots suck.
Billie, considering that this girl totally snogged you and now her brother is telling you to “be good to her,” I’m not sure how you’ve managed to miss the subtext.
Man, I really thought “snogged” meant more than it really means. Huh.
The Harry Potter franchise basically turned me British, slang and all.
Woah! Faintly latin-sounding words!
We gotta wizzad heah
The Jason Avatar helps the bring out ones inner Englishmen. Now go play some cricket, maybe a game of rugby
Slang AND avatar, it would seem. Bostin’.
I agree, Willis. I swear I have heard it used as much more somewhere… I was shocked when I read in Harry Potter that someone was snogging someone else in the hallway! Looked it up and it made more sense.
No, “Angus, Thongs and Perfect Snogging” was NOT a porno. Calm down.
You’re thinking ‘shag’.
And when you mix the two you get whatever the British term for oral sex is. Perhaps Shogged?
I bet you think ‘tea’ is a hot drink. Silly Americans.
Tea is a hot drink.
It can also be served cold.
Also, in Britain, it’s a meal/snack that includes said hot drink. Which is where the meal/snack took its name. Which is why it’s hardly foolish to equate the two. Especially for the ~7.052 billion of us that live in not-Britain.
Better than Snagged, eh?
And *then* you meat Shoggoth.
It’s “oral”, or usually much the same slang as in the US, seeing as it was probably your WW2 GIs that introduced us to the very concept…
I’m having a hard time believing there was no oral sex in Britain before WW2.
When I read this I literally clenched my fists in front of my monitor and made a vigorous scissoring gesture with my fingers.
Wait… just how OLD is Howard? And who is taking care of him? Was he just allowed to drive down? Is he in foster care?
He’s sixteen, almost seventeen. Ruth said he was sixteen earlier in the day.
Must… resist… Sound of Music quotes…
Maybe its time think….
Give in to the Dark Side, Super Duper. We have the Sound of Music.
LET THE MUSICAL THEATRE FLOW THROUGH YOU.
And willingly I’ll belive
So he’s almost old enough…
No, I was talking ab.. never mind…
I was implying sexual things with Billie and/or Dina. I live in Illinois and 16 year olds drive all the time. I was being dirty…
Since Billie is 18? 19? Then statutory rape laws wouldn’t apply since they’re still within three years of age of each other. I think.
5 seconds of Wikipedia searches reveals that the AoC in Indiana is 16. And it is as low as 14 if the person you are consenting to is less than 18. So, so far the only person out of the question for those of you who like to keep your fantasies legal for the jurisdiction in which the fantasized acts would take place is Roz’s younger sister Riley, who is 12 and not legal anywhere in North America, outside of a few of the Mexican states.
So he’s at least 16 1/2, and is pushing his luck if starting off any later than 8pm…
Sound more like the lyrics to the theme song of an old show called 6teen
He’s under his grandfather’s care, if I recall correctly.
Drive with integrity, Howard.
I have No Regrets.
This is the only path.
My whole life was Unlimited Roomies Reference Works.
I see what you did there
More Billie and Ruth *and* Howard is going away?
This is the happiest strip in months!
*muffled screams of daisy’s jealousy in the distance*
Can’t hear her over Ruth and Billies’ moans of pleasure.
I’ll be in my bunk.
Get lost Joe, Daisy and Sal can join in though.
Faz: The Great Faz, with the aid of these self-made charts, will introduce this group to the concept of “orgy.”
YOUR OVERLORD GALASSO DEMANDS A PERSONAL HAREM!
“… A PERSONAL HAREM BEARING MEAL DISKS!”
Wh…. why would you post that right now?
Just kiss already.
Billie and Howard?
Howard and Ruth.
In panel 4 Howard looks worried. He must care enough for his big sister he doesn’t want Billie to hurt her emotionally.
True. I think he’s also about 5 miles outside of his comfort zone about their relationship and how to behave around it.
“And what ever you do, don’t use your car to hit another car out of the way of a speeding truck.”
And no matter what happened, don’t bump into a police car. Not even the lightest of light tap. Apparently cops are very sensitive about their cars.
You’ll get two stars like THAT.
And no running over bikers. Trust me, it doesn’t end well.
But if they see you with a big rpg out in the street they see it as a normal day. -GTA logic
Concealed Carry? Are you gonna argue it’s not?
Concealed Carry? You have the RPG on your shoulder!
You didn’t see nothing! Capisce?
Isn’t that a double negative?
“You saw some things, but none of them were me.”
I thought that unconcealed carry was more legal than concealed carry. So maybe they just assume you have a license for it.
Not sure about you, but I’d avoid the guy walking around with a loaded RPG. And I’m definitely not going to ask them if they’ve got a license.
In theory, the safest place you can be is right next to the guy with an RPG, because if he fires at you, the explosion would kill him too.
Remember, the legal landscape in the fictional state of San Andreas is not the same as the one in real-life California – there’s an amendment they’re seriously considering passing for mandatory carry.
I love you, Ruth, but…yes. Yes you are. When Billie tries to drink herself into a beer comma, then you can call her high maintenance. Until then, don’t toss rocks about your glass house.
In the case of an impending beer comma. you might get an irritated colon, so make the excuse of having your period and dash to the bathroom where you can brace yourself.
I may just have to quote that.
Everyone should make a point of marking this for their quote files, no question about it.
You are a beautiful person.
7 internets, just for you.
Very nicely done.
It’s sweet, They are being a loving brother and sister here.
But, yeah, this arc worries me too. Parents died in car accident, true.
Ruth also died in a car accident in the old universe, and Howard didn’t. So…
We need some happy people this visiting parent weekend.
Mike’s parents weren’t enough?
Unhugged Sarah spoiled it for them.
Awww they care about each other, how sweet.
Awww, Howard. Those last two panels warm the cockles of my heart.
So….. is Ruth going to be “Billie’s Lesbian”?
No need for one to be the other’s anything. They are both bi-laterally bisexual.
Billie’s Bi card is in order, but when has Ruth ever showed interest in the opposite sex?
To my knowledge, she hasn’t shown it but Willis has said on his tumblr that neither she nor Billie are into women exclusively.
Please tell me they’re not going to end in a menage-a-trois with Danny.
If one of them puts on an Amazi-Girl costume, then the likelihood of this is near 1.
That might’ve been possible in the Walkyverse if certain events hadn’t transpired. Not so much here.
Sexuality is consistent cross-universe, so her experience with…Ryan, I think…in Roomies! probably constitutes evidence.
Unless… maybe that’s why she didn’t enjoy the sex with him.
Ruth has specifically stated that she has too much on her mind to worry about what sort of plumbing the person she is interested in has, when Howard was asking if she’s gay. That is generally a bi sort of answer.
Source: I’m bi.
Aww they’re so cute together. Now kiss.
Hands at 10 and 2 has been an obsolete safety precaution ever since they started putting airbags in steering wheels. The new way is hands at 9 and 3.
I keep my hands at 8 and the passenger seat headrest. Close enough?
Old Chevy with a bench seat.
Girl with head on my shoulder.
LH at 10; RH over her R shoulder and sliding in to 2nd base.
No, haven’t you been listening? 10 and 2 is no good anymore; you need to try for 9 and 3rd.
That’s my default position as well. Power steering means there’s no longer the need to keep your arms placed in anticipation of having to apply a great deal of torque alluvasudden in response to hazards. I can spin the thing lock-to-lock in under two seconds with the palm of one hand even when parked, not like the 10-to-2-to-20-to-4 sawing motion needed to wrench it round on my first car.
I think even the police admit now there’s no “correct” hand position in the modern age. Plus it was probably dreamt up when wheels were somewhat more steeply canted than they are today, so you’d be resting more of your forearm upon the rim… nowadays your elbow hangs off your wrist quite heavily and it’s a recipe for arm strain.
I thought the same thing when I read it. On the plus side, I feel less old now.
I just looked it up, I was thinking Willis was 30ish, but I guess he is 34, so he would have started driving before airbags were standard.
I’m 25 and I learned 10 and 2 as well, so it wasn’t the fastest thing to integrate into driver’s ed. But hey, I’ve got an ancient car without airbags anyway.
I still resent having to change my habits whenever I drive my SO’s car though.
Hmm.. I’m the same age, but I remember it being 9 and 3. Could be different states?
Actually, 10 and 2 isn’t obsolete. With your hands in that position, you’re able to use hand-over-hand more effectively, which gives you better control of your car. Also, 10 and 2 keeps your arms bent, with your elbows pointing away from your body slightly. If the better control doesn’t keep you out of a collision, at the very least your arms will be pushed away from your body, rather than towards your body.
No, that’s the thing. I learned hand over hand (I’m 26) but my 17 year old cousin learned “push pull” or “hand to hand” steering. He was told to keep his hands low on the wheel for this method and to prevent injury from airbag deployment.
I have a coworker from Carmel, and it this is an informed part of Howard and Ruth’s back story, everything about them from here on out will make perfect sense.
I work in Carmel. I agree a million percent.
Initiating LOL sequence.
Ha ha ha ha ha.
Ain’t that the pot calling the kettle black, again
I’m seeing Billies…three of them…in a row….is that a good thing?
That means that you just lost the drinking contest.
Unsurprising, really, given your opponent.
It’s the kettle calling another kettle a kettle.
Am I the only one getting a Clinton/Clare vibe from Howard and Ruth?
I mean, freckled, red hair, the younger brother’s obsessed with technology…
The younger brother here isn’t obsessed with technology in the way Clinton is. Howard enjoys using technology, but he doesn’t seem interested in the mechanics of it at all.
this is all i could think of to do after reading this
i hope it works
Aw. I’m happy they’re both somewhat protective of each other, rather than Howard being the clueless dolt his sister has to violently protect. (He’s still pretty clueless, but hey! Caring!)
Oh god, Howard is gonna die.
I think Willis just made it clear that he’s not going to die….unless that Doctor Who GIF mean the first rule….
If you are in a car leaving, you are safe . If they draw you driving, you are definitely headed for an accident. It’s soap opera 101. Plus if it rains or snows and you drive, an accident is inevitable. So lets hope we don’t see him driving.
And if it is raining and you get passed by some motorcycles, you are going to have a flat tire.
Lovin’ the angle of Billie’s face in the last panel. Damn cute.
Oh, come on! Carmel?!? Fishers is so much a better town.
I don’t think Willis picked Carmel based off what he thinks is the best town.
no kidding. I was just throwing it out no meaning much behind it.
Ha! I lived in Indy for 5 or 6 years and most of that was in Fishers. My ex-husband’s family lived in Carmel.
Sign language tidbit: the signs for Fishers and Carmel are pretty similar, both involve signing the first letter of their names and taking that letter and kinda make a double-tapping/circular gesture to your nose as you slightly tip your head up to indicate that you’re nose is in the air (i.e. you’re stuck up).
I dunno man; Fishers is getting to Carmel-tier with all of their fancy roundabouts now.
Nah, they’re going beyond Carmel due to the Michigan Lefts they’re putting in! It’s Noblesville and Westfield going Carmel-like.
REPRESENT! (I’m a resident of Fishers Indiana)
Something I have been very curious about since Howard was first introduced a few episodes back…
This was the ‘Freshman’s Parent Weekend’ right..?
So… umm… why is the RA’s brother showing up? I’m pretty sure that they don’t make RA’s out of freshmen. And things Ruth and others have said made it sound like she’s been there for years.
So what the heck is a non-frosh family member doing there during frosh days?
I believe, at least at my college, that RA’s and SA’s of freshman floors participate in the freshmen activities as well.
I don’t think they prevent family members of sophmores and up from coming to visit. Ruth’s pretty damned lonely all things considered and she might have felt the need for someone to be there with all those other parents around.
This might have been Howard being really nice because he figures that Ruth would be really, really sad during a parents’ weekend at the college.
Love this strip, makes me love more and more that I got a Billie & Ruth sketch from SPX!
Eh, it’s not that bad. Yeah, some of the people who live there are super uptight and shit, but my best friend from college and my Godmother and her family are the exceptions to that.
Also, I live super close to it, and there’s a ton of awesome shops and stuff to see there.
Billie is completely unaware that Ruth thinks they’re dating, isn’t she?
Oh and I just read the hypertext. Whoops.
HTML, man! HTML!
Yeah, I think image tags get filtered out for us…
None of mine worked
Like, not even a single one.
Willis, you do a nice job of showing growing relationship trust here.
I can’t read the hipertexto, please share it!
Curses… No picture.
Still trying to get a picture using html…
Nope, HTML doesn’t seem to be working.
Stop trying to break the page with HTML, Diss
Weird. I’m copying what David Willis used in his picture post, but getting nothing.
Okay what subtext are we talking about.
I’m not even joking, what.
Think of it like a fortune cookie.
“Be good to my sister.” …
“Why am I even here” in the poll, Willis.
Hands at 9 and 3. It’s not 10 and 2 anymore; they changed it a few years back. When I was in high school.
Not in any area I’m familiar with. Where do you live?
Goddamn it, her parents probably died in a car accident, didn’t they?
There’s, uh, no probably about it: http://www.dumbingofage.com/2013/comic/book-3/03-answers-in-hennessy/not-directly/
What’s with this family and car accidents
I guess it’s right that Ruth’s concerned since it’s apparently genetic
Damn you Willis
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Fourth annual "Favorite DoA undergrad character" poll: (pick three)
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