All these words describe the same thing.
A person can awe at how awkward Danny can be.
A person can awe at how Danny cute can be.
Amber’s no slouch at awkward. It gets drowned out by other things but she can cringe with the best of them.
a person can cute at how danny awkward can be
Two out of three ain’t bad
I find it cure that they’re both wearing very similar hoodies
definitely meant ‘cute’
Yeah super cure.
It’s a blush within a blush.
“You’re waiting for a ship. A ship that will take you far away. You know where you hope it will lead to, but you can’t know for sure. Yet it doesn’t matter. Tell me why?”
Nice variant on the obvious. Keeps it fresh.
It’s far better than microwavable jokes, but those are cheaper, to be fair.
Because we have entered The Twilight Zone?
I refused to make the obvious joke.
I tried, and failed.
You are weak, but we can rebuild you, we have the technology. We can make you better than you were. Better…stronger… funnier.
Do I need to get a new Gravatar now?
Only if it meets the incredibly vague criteria of “Better…stronger… funnier.”
That’s a riddle, isn’t it?
That’s obviously a riddle. I can solve this. I’m Batman.
Or are you?
I know the answer to this riddle… We are ALL Batman. In here, our heart of hearts, we all know the pain that comes with Batman and thus we understand the mantle he wears. We grok you Batman, we grok you.
“Do I need to get a new Gravatar now” unscrambles to “Reading Town Regatta,” a boating race on the Thames River. You are obviously planning some heist in Berkshire, and timing it so you can escape amongst the contestants on the river.
I’m on to you, Riddler.
I’m Batman and so is my wife.
Go home Nordmann, you’re drunk. Everyone knows all wives are named Brian.
Wasn’t Robin the one that came up with the answers to all the riddles?
Yes but Batman takes the credit for it.
Batman trained to become the best at taking credit for other people’s work.
BECAUSE I’M BATMAN.
What weighs 6 ounces, sits in a tree and is very dangerous?
A sparrow with heat vision?
Yo dawg I heard you like awkward so we put blush in your blush so you can Dan while you Dan.
“So does that mean I have to send flowers now??”
Yes. Send her flowers randomly without pattern. You never want to hear “Oh flowers… what did you do?”
I sense a freakout runaway moment.
For a split-second, I saw “freakout runway moment” and thought of Danny as a fashion model in a dress.
Well okay it’s cool I was planning on trembling in horror in the corner for the rest of my life unable to cope with the mental image anyway.
Is it bad that I really want to see Danny being a fashion model in a dress?
Danny forgot the flowers, didn’t he.
Yes and he’s freaking out about it! Curse you unplanned dates!
Nothing a box of chocolates can’t fix.
Danny forgot those too. He also forgot her name, and anniversary date.
So do I…that’s why I don’t have a girlfriend in years.
That awkward moment when even when you’ve got it right you think you’ve got it wrong. Danny now has one up on Rio.
Danny’s going critical! He’s about to blow!!
And then Danny bit the lower half of his face off.
The less of him the better.
( I know, I promised I’d stop.
I’m a liar)
…Danny without his lower jaw is surprisingly disturbing.
Nonsense, I’m sure he has sexy maxilla.
He’s going to become Darth Malak?
I sense that Danny is about to screw this up.
Momentum can be hard to change.
Danny was already in the proccess of screwing things up the second he met Amber.
Well, Danny, you are so stupid, you deserve this hard feelings.
How the hell did that parents got that kinda child?
This very strip suggests his dad was him when he (the dad) was younger, so, yeah. That.
HE… COULD… GO… ALL… THE… WAAAAAAAY
HE’S AT THE THIRTY, THE TWENTY, THE TEN. LADIES AND GENTLEMEN I CAN’T BELIEVE WHAT I’M SEEING!!!
Then it turns out he was running the wrong way the entire time, and ended up scoring against himself.
And he still does an obnoxiousely long in-zone dance before it all sinks in.
This. All of this.
And then one of his teammates slowly walks over and whispers in his ear, and Danny stops middance and slowly turns to look at the camera before making the face in the last panel.
STOP RIGHT THERE. I GOTTA KNOW RIGHT NOW…
Let me sleep on it
And now I’m praying for the end of times, so I can end my Dans with you.
Maaaaan, what’s Amazigirl gonna say when she finds out about this?
I think she’ll be up for it.
Danny will be so disappointed when he finds out.
Yeah, I mean when that threesome goes twosome and Danny’s kicked out it’ll be a major blow to him.
I like to imagine it’s just amber touching herself with Amazi-girl’s glove and Danny’s too stupid to know the difference.
I’ll be in my bunk.
THAT CHEATING PIECE OF SCUM! HOW DARE HE CHEAT ON AMAZI-GIRL
~~~~~~~~~ will be pissed.
Whenever that name gets filtered, I’m just gonna pronounce it as *raspberry sound* in my head.
Captain Raspberry IS AMAZIGIRL!
Really? I thought it was ~~~~~~~~.
No, that is her first cousin, twice removed. They look very similar though, so the confusion is understandable.
Wait a… I guess I haven’t been keeping up to date with this stuff?
Is that supposed to be the name of a certain vaudeville enthusiast from the other ‘verse?
Indeed it is. Willis got a bit tired of people running that joke into the ground.
YOU LYING SACK OF SHIT! YOU WILL PAT FOR THIS!
You’re going to make him watch the movie It’s Pat?!
You monster! No one deserves that!
It’s Danny …
Danny’s probably realizing the primary danger of dating a superhero: they are fully capable of beating the ever-loving shit out of you.
Especially if he has watched the movie MY SUPER EX-GIRLFRIEND.
He hasn’t. No one has.
Why would anyone? It sucks.
But the shark scene…
You can’t fix bad concepts with Sharks, Hollywood!
Unless the concept is sharks. Or tornados. Or Octopi.
Octopuses, it’s a Greek root word so the Latin sufix for multiple – i is not applicable.
Pee’ed ants R us.
Well, the truly correct form is octopodes.
I can pedant with the best of them.
Mixing up your hellenistic roots is like half the fun of english.
Lies. Sharks fix everything.
Couldn’t beat that one movie where a shark bite off an airplane…while it is still in flight.
Even the shark scene wasn’t that good.
Why was the shark chasing him around the apartment? Why wasn’t it just lying there gasping for breath? Why did it look like bad CGI?
It was all questions and no answers.
…was bizarre enough to be interesting right up until whatserface opened her mouth, and then whatsizface responded. Flung shark – 1; humour – 0.
You’re living in a naive fantasy world, Doctor. …can I join you?
Can’t think of anything else than https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=59Zvv4Y9ojg
Well that and you’re pretty much a target for any villain.
That’s why I’m expecting him to be murdered and his body stuffed into a refrigerator.
Or a pizza oven. What do you think makes those meal-discs so sumptuous?
Human. The other white meat.
Hey, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles ate a lot of pizza …
I’ve lost more girlfriends that way…
Well, Selina and Talia is still around….or did both of them kicked the bucket too?
If Ra’s thought that there was still any chance of Talia getting Batman he’d just Laz her back anyway.
And Danny, now you have to choose. Amazi-Girl or Amber….oh who am I kidding?
Amber is way better to date than Sal.
I don’t even know if it’s late or early right now, all I know is it’s Dumbing of Age o’ clock and I’m awake to see it. Woo.
And all their lives go to shit in 3, 2, 1…
Houston, we have lift-off, I repeat, we have lift off.
“Houston, we have a problem. The moon seems to have a problem with us as well.”
Is Danny in that last panel suddenly realizing that he cannot think of his parents as college students in love?
Never mind — I’m an idiot. I just realized that it’s Danny and Amber holding hands. D’oh!
No, it’s probably the first time he’s held a girl’s hand since Dorothy broke up with him. So that awkward look might also be the realization that he is over Dorothy.
I like that theory!
I broke up with a girl in the 11th grade and I’m still not over it. *cries and eats a gallon of ice cream*
Well to be fair didn’t you just start twelfth grade?
Danny just imagined his parents Joeing.
This is where I was going originally. A third possibility is that he just imagined himself married to Amber!
SO MUCH BLUSHESSSS
Danny that last panel does not inspire confidence, please don’t screw this up.
Don’t give him too hard of a time, he’s remembering he’s “cheating” on someone.
He’s about to Danny this whole thing all over again.
Can you blame him?
Amber set him up for perfectly dan worthy Danning.
YOU DANNED IT UP AGAIN
I GAVE YOU THE BENEFIT OF THE DOUBT BUT NO
YOU’RE STILL STUPID AS FUCK
…’k, done. But… *sigh*
I’m gonna look back at yesterday’s strip to cheer myself up.
I was one of those people who thought Danny knew Amber was Amazi-Girl all along, he was just deluding himself.
Obviously, I overestimated him. Danny is still an idiot, and I’m pretty sure he always will be.
I would like to bring up Clark Kent and Superman to the table.
That has nothing to do with DoA, so I’m not sure why you’re bringing it up.
Dumbing of Age is more grounded in reality than the Walkyverse, and as people have brought up time and time again, Danny spends a lot of time with both Amber and Amazi-Girl.
Now that Amber knows Danny’s true feelings, I can see her revealing her identity to him, but I’m still mad at Danny for being dumb.
So Amber doesn’t have laser eyes?
THAT EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Point taken but let’s say Danny have that thought in his head that maybe Amazi-Girl is Amber but he somehow has doubt about it. Keep in mind that at this point Danny knew about how Dorothy and Amber looked similar, so there is also this nagging thought that maybe Amazi-Girl and Amber may look similar but they might be two different person. Or it he could dense as a lead balloon.
Well, he certainly has drawn comparisons between Amber and Amazi-Girl in the past, so he’s likely at least subconsciously aware that they are very similar… But goddamn, he’s just so clueless it makes me wanna scream.
From the “It shouldn’t work but it does (at least for a while)” department…
By changing some appearance cues and body language, I’ve been able to make people who have known me for years absolutely unable to recognize me. Human brains are strongly pattern-oriented. All that needs be done is to break that pattern. It can’t work forever, though; unless you are an actor with a terrifically strong will, or are a wee bit schizophrenic.
Wait, by feeling guilty for having feelings for two different women? The fiend!
Yeah, it’s not like people could have feelings for two different people, right?
Nope, by being insufferably oblivious. I’m insulting his intelligence, not his morals.
Well, in his defense, noone else has figured it out either.
No one else hangs out with Amazi-Girl that frequently.
The stupid thing is, Dorothy has only met Amazi-Girl once and she still figured out (probably) enough about her to be able to identify her quite easily once she gets around to it.
It’s quite simple, really. He’s been looking at Amazi-Girl’s ass the entire time. The mystery will finally start to unravel the first time Danny actually pays attention when Amber bends over.
At the same time!
This is the first time I’ve checked the alt-text without prompting, and I’m kind of sad I did.
Please do inform us poor mobile users what said alt-text says…
“The Wilcoxes can’t bring themselves to directly compliment their son, so they change the subject back to themselves.”
So Danny’s parents are Yotomoe?
“the wilcoxes can’t bring themselves to directly compliment their son, so they change the subject back to themselves”
Be afraid, Danny. Be very afraid.
AND THE CROWD GOES WIIIIILD!!!!!!
This is not a very good position to be in for him. Deciding between two girls…. sort of.
Dan Wilcox it up, I just know it.
“Yes, you were my roller coaster — and I’m glad I was big enough to ride.”
I was gonna make a joke about seat-stretching, but…
But now you’re more like Bumper cars. Fun for a while but after about 5 minutes I’m over it.
Danny, your “girlfriend” is someone who refuses to share her actual identity with you. You don’t have a relationship.
She is also sitting next to you. The mask isn’t really that clever.
Well, most people don’t know that Oliver Queen is Green Arrow even though he’s the only dude in Star City that has that beard. So, I’m giving Danny the benefit of a doubt here.
Everyone off-panel, or off-screen has that beard. NO EXCEPTIONS.
True but is Oliver Queen famous? I mean wouldn’t you think that’s just Some dude?
Well, he is the richest dude in Star City.
Yeah, he is. He’s basically DC’s version of Tony Stark.
By which I mean he’s a billionaire businessman who runs his own company, not the drinking problem etc. It occurs to me that I think DC maybe also has another guy like that, but I can’t think of who.
Oh no. Now he’s going to Dan this up by taking back everything he just said by saying, “….but I’m in love with Amazi-Girl.”
Hopefully we get this instead:
“But I’m in love wi-”
“YOUR MEAL DISCS HAVE ARRIVED, PEASANTS!”
And they all live happily ever after.
“but I’m in love with-”
*Danny gets punched by Yotomoe*
“But I’m in love with-”
“But I’m in love with-”
“The great FAZ has arrived. If he were in this situation, the great FAZ would have had
Faz is also still in Dina’s room. He’s EVERYWHERE. He’s like a bad infestation.
OH GOD. DINA. We’ve left her alone for so long now!
And with Faz, too!
Don’t worry. Eventually she will go all velociraptor on him.
She could fix that easily. She has the mask.. she could whip it out and put it on.
yeah but danny would just think amber was cosplaying as amazi-girl.
“You look uncannily like Amazi-Girl!”
Oh god, you can see him about to Danny it up any second now!
Danny, will it help you figure out what’s going on if we put it in terms of “Jem and the Holograms”?
Reading through comments now, I’m glad to see I wasn’t the only one who immediately thought of Jem.
Danny, freaking out about cheating on his girlfriend with her other persona, it would funny as hell if amber confessed to him and he rejected her then when’s she amzi-girl she be all pissed at him and he would be like “what I do?”
I think you mean annoying and repeated-punches-to-Danny’s-face frustrating.
I think I would like to see a comic of an enraged amazi-girl punching Danny repeatedly in the face. And I’m not even ashamed.
Danny, don’t screw this up. That’ll put you right back into the negatives.
Unable to handle the conflicting emotions Danny up and flees Gelasso’s…
…Only to be run over by a truck just outside the door…
…Driven by Blaine…
Amber would straight-up rip Blaine in half if that happened.
Amber then crafts a makeshift weapon out of a box of (food) scraps within Galasso’s and sets out after Blaine. Armed with a Pizza Pie-shield and a Sub-Sword, Amazigirl sets off on her quest of vengeance.
This is why having a secret identity can put serious dampers on one’s social life.
Danny’s Parents got tired of talking to Danny. Which is understandable. I fall asleep just reading his words.
Mr. Wilcox, what happen to hand! Is so small, like little girl.
Okay, so after this, Amber’s gonna propose some good old fashioned boning, then Danny goes all “but Amazi-girl” and then Amber puts on the mask, followed by the most glorious implied sex in the history of ever, right? There’s no way this story arc could end on a downer caused by the stupidity of Danny and Amber’s secrecy, right?
Danny’s parents are jerks, but with the arms race of shitty parents, they don’t really register much.
That said, I am bit surprised no one has made a “jizzed in his pants” joke about the last panel. Maybe not a lot of overlap with DoA and Lonely Island fans? Dunno.
I’m willing to give him the benefit of the doubt that holding hands isn’t that sort of exciting for Danny, boring white bread that he is. I mean, he did have Billy all up on him in the past and there was no mention of involuntary premature actions, haha.
Though, I didn’t think the last panel looked like anything near a jizzface.
Of course Danny being “the fool he is” will screw everything up in the next comic…
…I can feel it!
I am assuming that it’s actually very difficult to recognize Amazi-Girl. Danny is doing the right thing.
She disguises her voice, wears her hair differently, and carries herself differently, so it’s more than just a mask thing. She also wears looser clothing in her daily life, I think. I am not clear on if she is wearing the costume over her clothes or just undies or something. Either way, she will look fairly different, plus we’re operating on costumed heroes rules anyway.
It’s kind of like the Clark Kent thing, I think. There was a scene in the first issue of the “Blackest Night” miniseries when two members of the Justice League were at Bruce Wayne’s grave (he got better), and started talking about disguises.
“Clark slouches, wears clothes that are two sizes too big, and raises his voice an octave.”
That’s true. Superman also has the benefit of being someone who is so omnipresent, seemingly, in Metropolis that a lot of people don’t likely think of him as having a secret identity at all. His being an alien is known, since he has told Lois as much with the understanding she’d report it, and a lot of people probably think he is Superman all day.
Amber, at the earliest chance, please tell Danny you’re Amazi-Girl.
Aw, Amber, please tell him before he screws this up somehow.
i figured i’d throw this out there before he either redeemed himself or did something even dumber. Over 9000 hours in ms paint etc etc. http://i.imgur.com/I46h2m1.png
At first I laughed, but then I wnet “Hey! That’s mean!”. :p
Oh Danny. It was nice while it lasted.
well danny, even your parents have to struggle to say nice things about you. that’s impressive, to say the least.
also, danny, don’t worry, Amazi-girl will understand. in fact, she’ll prolly know before yo even tell her about it.
I always marvel how folk in the comics can just whip on a strip of cloth and not be recognized by someone who has made them a study.
Amber is OBVIOUSLY who she is,.. Same hairstyle, same body build, probably same scent,..(Sorry but people smell) Yet this guy remains Cluelesws,.. C’mon,.. his subconscious must be SCREAMING who she is.
I think that’s the deal with Danny: The connection between his subconscious and conscious mind is short-circuited :p
She wears a mask, does a voice, changes her hair, and I suspect her body language changes when she puts the mask on (probably not even deliberately). But it’s not a full-coverage mask, the voice has slipped at least once and she wasn’t even doing it when they first met, her hair is just mussed, not a wig or even really a different hairstyle, and she can’t change the shape of her face or her size and build. And scent is really hard to compartmentalize.
Other characters have failed to identify Amazi-Girl. (Billie in particular has come up with a really stupid theory… but Billie honestly isn’t very bright.) None of them have gotten up close and personal with Amber in both her guises the way Danny has, though. (‘Cept maybe Ethan and Mike, pre-DoA… but Ethan knows, and Mike seems to know everything about everyone.) Danny should at least be noticing about now that Amber uses the same shampoo that Amazi-Girl does…
And there’s a point where “unobservant” shades into “not really paying attention to your (girl)friend”…
A pair of glasses was enough to fool Lois Lane, and a mask was good enough for Zorro, The Lone Ranger, The Green Hornet, and Wesley (from “The Princess Bride”). ˆAnd remember that Commissioner Gordon never tumbled to the fact that his own daughter was Batgirl.
this had better be leading up to her kissin’ him and him having a look of shocked realization on his face or so help me
Danny will meet with Amber/Amazi-Girl later that night and will take of the mask.
Danny will go “Huh? Wha? When? How?”, but before he can finish Amber gives him the warmest, tenderest, lovingest, filling-sucking kiss in the history of webcomics.
sigh… I need a girlfriend T_T
Nah, he’ll feel all guilty, and confess to AG – who will in-turn, invoke the ‘superheros can’t have stable relationships without work getting in the way’ rule and strongly suggest that this ‘Amber’ girl is probably a much better match for him. He’ll begrudgingly agree.
*Fast forward to a random strip a year or two from now after the Amber/Danny relationship is firmly established*
Amber’s always disappearing at random times for unexplained reasons, to which Danny assumes she’s cheating on him – then follows her one night… uncovering the truth. This leads to a fair bit of discomfort, awkward glances, and hurt feelings, which may or may not be reversible in their relationship.
(All this is assuming she’s not exposed earlier by Billie or Blaine)
Danny if Sal knew you were cheating on her with this girl who likes to cosplay as Amazi-Girl, she’d be devastated.
So just how big of a coronary is he gonna have when she finally busts out the mask?
Maybe Danny just has very poor night vision too.
Danny’s either about to Danny this up or somehow, undeservedly pull it off.
Danny thinks he’s cheating on Amazigirl by doing this. Tomorrow’s comic will be awkward to say the least. I feel bad for him.
I was really wondering if I was the only one. Yet I expect when Amber comes clean about lying to him, and the hurt ensues, in the forums it will somehow still be all Danny’s fault.
Danny clearly likes Pina-Coladas. Fortunately for him Amazi-girl likes being costumed in the rain.
Well, he’s not into yoga. But Amazi-girl is into champ-pain! (Giving it out to all the evildoers!)
That’s Danny realizing that the carney has clicked the safety bar and the roller coaster is on its long way up to drop him into sheer terror that he will only enjoy in retrospect.
Yep. That’s the “Oh God I said it. Oh God, Oh God I meant it. Omigod, omigod omigod she believed it.” face.
… Don’t you fuck up Danny…
Aww young love,
Spring when a man has a Love triangle
with the same woman of his dreams.
But in the DoA world, it’s still fall — remember, this is the weekend of the Parents’ Day football game?
You’re both at fault here.
Those are two really weird ways to spell “Willis”…
Yeah it’s a phonetic thing.
For now I’ll be happy if Danny let’s Amber have this for the rest of the day.
Here’s my take on this: Danny obviously wasn’t expecting to go on a date with Amber today, but they’ve hung out enough in the past so that he can pass as her boyfriend. Everything he said was true – he just never realized it until he was “actually” (but not really) dating Amber. When he does meet up with AG, I predict that DANNY will be the one to break it off.
If these were real people I can see that happening. I would also see Amber then coming clean about being AG (and Sal :p ). But there is too much material in Danny not knowing who AG is so I think he will be in the dark longer than Amber would normally do if this were not a comic. Poor Danny… Living in ignorance for our amusement.
Hope Danny figures it out on his own. Failing that, I think that AG is going to let him down very easy…
Figure out her secret identity or what decision he should make?
They both look so cute blushing, then Danny looks like hes going to Danny things up in the panel and then the alt-text made me depressed. Damnation come to you swiftly Willis and all that, blah blah.
That last panel. It is Danny realizing who Amazi-girl is. You can disguise the hair and voice, and wear a mask, but he recognizes the grip.
Either that or she is squeezing so hard that she is breaking bones in his hand.
This is what happens when you bet on Danny, you lose.
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Fourth annual "Favorite DoA undergrad character" poll: (pick three)
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