Nope, Joe’s never had sex with anyone. Even Joyce. Double heaven.
Kazuma Shouri
no I’m pretty sure demisexual means that even holding hands with Joyce counts as sex. I should know, I’m a greyace demiromantic, which would make me an expert on demisexuality, surely
:P
I know we haven’t seen him interact with many people since it happened but it’s funny that Sal of all people is like the first or second person to give Joe condolences about his breakup.
(I haven’t checked if Sarah gave any, though she was righteously angry on his behalf.)
Sarah gave her condolences/checked in on Joe and then the conversation went “please don’t let this undo your character development” “Don’t worry, it wont”
The alt text suggests that these three (Danny, Joe, Sal) would normally show up on September 10th.
I’m guessing that’s the anniversary date for the first Roomies comic.
eh, whatever
No, it suggests they last showed up in the same strip together on Sep. 10th.
IntangibleMatter
Last time they were in the same strip together on September 10th was in 2022.
Needfuldoer
I didn’t realize there were so many insert strips!
John Campbell
This was the first actual Roomies! strip, which ran on September 10th, 1997. Willis has a tendency to observe that anniversary with riffs on it, like that 2022 25th anniversary strip that has Danny talking to his mom on the phone, with Sal being the one climbing out the window.
(If you follow that link… don’t read backwards; it’s worse. Going forward gets better, eventually.)
Nobody deserves to spark change in anyone. That’s a really weird thing to believe in. You don’t pick the people who matter to you, and honestly I think Joe is ultimately happier because of Joyce.
Gonna go ahead and bullet point my thoughts here:
*Hope Danny learns soon that Joe got cheated on, because I do not buy for one second that he’d be this chill if he knew already
* I sure hope Sal doesn’t yet know Walky got cheated on, because I don’t like that she’d be this chill about it if she knew!
*Aw, they’re in looooooove
*Good on Joe for keeping that character development and finally admitting out loud that he’s in love with Joyce. You can forgive a lot of someone you’re in love with. Maybe it’s not good for him to be forgiving this much.
I agree with you but its possible that Danny and Sal learning about the cheating is going to come at the most inopportune time for Joyce and Dorothy.
…Actually, who really knows besides Sara, Becky, and Billie? Because to this point Dorothy and Joyce seems like it was such a given to the cast, they must all be under the assumption it was all mutual breakups.
They kind of have to be, because otherwise this friend group is not acting at all like you’d expect a bunch of college kids to react to two members of said friend group cheating on their partners, both of whom are also in the friend group.
Sirksome
I think this is one of those situations where they’re respecting the boundaries of their friend’s business that is entirely the effected people’s choice to talk about and act on. There are definitely at least rumors floating because Raidah, Asma, and Alice have heard the gossip, and I don’t think it would be hard for Sal to figure it out if she hasn’t already, but the subject of relationships and cheating is sensitive and embarrassing so if you’re friends aren’t volunteering the information it can be the best and most supportive move to just tread water instead of shaking things up in someone’s defense.
Miroku2235
Heck, most adult friend groups wouldn’t take the act of two of their number cheating on another two of their number so passively. Most of these characters are seemingly just shrugging their shoulders and going “Being faithful to your partner? Sounds dumb”
Thing 2
Is this a USA thing? I’m perpetually puzzled as to why anyone calls this cheating at all, let alone repeatedly and expecting anger.
yak
What do you call it when you have sex with a person without prior consent from your monogamous partner, Thing 2?
rowan
For some reason the website won’t let me reply to yak, or anyone past here in the comment nesting. I’m with Thing 2, they didn’t fuck until having broken up with their respective partners. They did kiss before the breakups but I think expecting the friend group to be big mad at them on their friends behalf is disproportionate. Show extra sympathy and understanding to the jilted Joe and walk, sure, but it’s really not like an affair
thejeff
@Thing 2: Mostly we call it cheating because the comic itself does. Every time any of the characters talk about, it’s in terms of cheating. Not a single person finding out what happened has said anything like “That was just kissing and you broke up the next day. That doesn’t count.” That would be a valid take, but it hasn’t come up.
Willis has described this as a cheating arc. This all might be partly because of their being uncomfortable with cheating stories, leading to a lower standard for what counts.
zee
@Thing 2 bruh what are you, French?
Big Z
@Thing 2: A lot of it does ride on the technicalities and letter-of-the-law stuff. YMMV (and it obviously does), but it’s been the lived experience of a lot of folks that getting even anywhere close to something that can be described as “cheating” (even, yes, something as weaksauce as “kissing a new partner while still technically ‘dating’ your previous partners without breaking up first, even if the previous relationships were short”) is a huge red flag for a couple of reasons.
–
One, it’s still fundamentally dishonest. If there’s ANY expectation of monogamous behavior, and many of us have argued that in their cultural context there WAS/IS, then stepping out on that is at least arguably cheating.
–
Two, in this modern world of STIs and risk factors, “hooking up with someone else without telling your other partners” is IMHO fundamentally unethical — to abuse a hypothetical, if Dorothy happened to have a barely-noticable cold sore during the protest kiss, suddenly Joe’s unknowingly at risk for genital herpes after the blanket/weenus interaction!
dLileh
Imho, this friends group is exactly behaving as expected if two of their members cheated!
Relationships are a very personal thing. Even if they are very good friends that share intimate details, they will allways miss information about what actually happened and how the cheaters and the cheated feel about the whole thing. Could be that the involved persons don’t want others to make a big fuss out of it. Could be, that the involved don’t want to risk splitting the friends group. Could be, that the ex-couple agreed on being just a fling (so nothing serious). … I could think of a couple more reasons.
It would be insolent to interefer in the relationships of other people in any case.
Dot
It’s not unreasonable if we assume everyone here is a mature adult, but they aren’t! They’re kids! Hormonal young adults who should be having bigger reactions.
Big Z
@dLileh – who says anything about interfering in the relationships of other people? If I discover that someone’s a cheater, I’m not likely to continue to trust them, because by definition cheating involves dishonesty.
–
THEY can manage their relationships however they like, but if they do so in an unethical way I’m going to treat them like an unethical person.
dLileh
@ Big Z: Well, you do you. I would not treat somebody that cheated in a relationship any different in day to day life. Why would I bother how that person behaves in a relationship, if I don’t plan having one with them? I’m way more pissed at people cheating at work or in life in general …
I would probably think a bit longer if I wanted to start a relationship with them, but it’s not a complete “no definately not!” for me. In a real life setting it’s not as simple as “The cheater is bad and the cheated is a poor victim.” There are reasons why cheating happens. Just to name a few:
– Was it a one time thing, that happened because the relationship was already crumbling and fell apart later? -> Take care of the relationship. Talk about the needs and love languages of both of you.
– Is it notorious? -> Some people can’t be monogamous. Don’t try to have a closed relationship with them. Either find an honest way how to be with them or don’t date them.
Don’t get me wrong, I think, that cheating in a relationship is clearly wrong and should be prevented. (Also, I personally never cheated. So this is not me trying to justify anything) I’m a big fan of honesty. And I think that decades of romcoms put a destructively wrong idea of relationships into our minds.
Also, I personally would not count Joyce kissing Dorothy at the demo cheating (I know the comic does, and that’s alright.). It kind of happened in the moment. If she afterwards continues to kiss Dorothy without telling Joe, then I would consider it cheating. But Joe knows about it, so there is no dishonesty here. The only problem I see, is that Dorothy doesn’t know about the limbo-state of Joyces relationship with Joe, so there is some dishonesty towards her.
Thing 2
Zee: Mais non.
The Jeff: So we are required to follow that convention?
Yak: That depends on several things, like Was Walky actually a “Partner”?; has monogamy been established in either case?; why is monogamy assumed if not discussed, as opposed to assuming open?; did anyone ‘have sex’ before talking to previous partner?; does kissing count as ‘having sex’?
I, personally, would not call what happened “cheating”, even if the comic does.
I’m pretty sure Sal is aware that the timeline of Joyce and Dorothy getting together overlaps with Walky being with Dorothy and Sal’s general reaction was “You’ll be in another girls pants by the end of the day dude” (basically she’s not mad on Walky’s behalf because she didn’t think he was serious about Dorothy this time around because he basically got with her a day after he broke up with Lucy like, an in-universe week and a half ago).
Astariel
Even less than that. Dorothy & Walky got back together on Tuesday, and Dorothy & Joyce kissed Saturday of the same week.
It’s front page news that Joyce & Dorothy kissed at the protest. Whether Joyce & Dorothy broke up with their partners before or after the protest-kiss is not something covered by the newspaper.
[Dot] Bullet point 2: Sal knew before anybody in the dorm except AG https://www.dumbingofage.com/comic/take-stock/ and I’m guessing Dan knew shortly after Sal dropped wounded AG off at her room.
As Anna said above, Sal knew they were being more gay than usual, but not when they broke up with their partners. Why would she assume cheating rather than a breakup?
Rimwalker55
She knew they were now a couple and Walky was with Dorothy and Joe was with Joe. Doesn’t take a law degree.
Rimwalker55
oops, Joe with Joyce. Missed it before the timer ran out.
thejeff
But why assume cheating then breakup, rather than breakup then getting together?
I think most people would expect Dorothy at least to do things by the book.
While I agree that the degree of deference Joe is giving Joyce is only going to lead to more pain, I think another thing that is factoring in here is Joe has done more than a little unpacking of what led to his initial promiscuity. He’s finally on the other side of some real bad headspace, and he’s liked who he’s becoming. He’s probably pretty wary of backsliding.
198 thoughts on “Hurricanic”
Doctor_Who
“Like a little bit” is actually the top of Sal’s scale.
“Malaya” is the bottom.
Dara
P. sure Malaya would insist they’re not not the bottom.
Rabid Rabbit
But they have such a nice one!
NGPZ
I love you, Sal :,)
Taffy
Joe is now canonically demisexual and has never had sex.
Doopyboop
Now he gets to go to double heaven!
Techhead
Never had sex before Joyce*
Taffy
Nope, Joe’s never had sex with anyone. Even Joyce. Double heaven.
Kazuma Shouri
no I’m pretty sure demisexual means that even holding hands with Joyce counts as sex. I should know, I’m a greyace demiromantic, which would make me an expert on demisexuality, surely
:P
Sirksome
Keeping it casual and non committed Sal x Danny. This is our new bedrock couple? We are so screwed.
mindbleach
Odds are, at some point, we get to find out if Sal is heteroflexible.
GreyICE
I think we’ve established that Sal is as straight as Becky is gay.
Dot
Admitting she kinda likes Danny is Sal’s way of saying she’s been daydreaming about putting a ring on it
Tequila Mockingbird
Now there is a mental image that made me happy as a clam to think about.
Justin8448
Sal’s smile when looking at the flowers on her desk that Danny bought for her gives her away entirely.
butting
Next Slipshine: Sal Puts a Ring on It.
tim Rowledge
Gotta be careful with those Ring cameras; too often feeds get to ICE.
Steamweed
They are committed to their non-commitment to each other.
clif
I just want to know what’s special about September 10.
clif
Oh, wait. That’s the day before 9-11.
That’s not a good omen.
Bright
September 10th is the anniversary date of both DoA and Roomies starting
Tan
See for example: https://www.dumbingofage.com/comic/semestersgoingfine/
M!a
September 10th is commemorated worldwide as The Last Good Day.
Nono
I know we haven’t seen him interact with many people since it happened but it’s funny that Sal of all people is like the first or second person to give Joe condolences about his breakup.
(I haven’t checked if Sarah gave any, though she was righteously angry on his behalf.)
Armadillo
Sarah and Joe did have a conversation which definitely counted. It was brief but Sarah was very nice.
furubatsu
Sarah gave her condolences/checked in on Joe and then the conversation went “please don’t let this undo your character development” “Don’t worry, it wont”
Rimwalker55
https://www.dumbingofage.com/comic/twelvedays/
Sarah was very supportive to Joe, but (oddly) also of Joyce.
jeffepp
What’s it going to take to get a threesome (or more) around here?
Armadillo
Safest bet would be a pov switch to that one throuple in the girl’s dorms.
DashWallkick
Technically, already happened with Mandy and the others.
Ray Radlein
wait does this mean tomorrow is 9/11? 😬
Thing 2
Can you explain that in words a non-USAvian would understand? Please?
Gigafreak
The alt text suggests that these three (Danny, Joe, Sal) would normally show up on September 10th.
I’m guessing that’s the anniversary date for the first Roomies comic.
eh, whatever
No, it suggests they last showed up in the same strip together on Sep. 10th.
IntangibleMatter
Last time they were in the same strip together on September 10th was in 2022.
Needfuldoer
I didn’t realize there were so many insert strips!
John Campbell
This was the first actual Roomies! strip, which ran on September 10th, 1997. Willis has a tendency to observe that anniversary with riffs on it, like that 2022 25th anniversary strip that has Danny talking to his mom on the phone, with Sal being the one climbing out the window.
(If you follow that link… don’t read backwards; it’s worse. Going forward gets better, eventually.)
Thing 2
Thanks everyone
DiDi
Aww, he wants something meaningful…
If there’s anyone who didn’t deserve to be the one to to spark this change in him, it’s definitely Joyce Brown. Life’s just not fair.
Meanwhile, Sal x Danny are still cute. But the bar is low enough to trip on at this point.
Geno
Nobody deserves to spark change in anyone. That’s a really weird thing to believe in. You don’t pick the people who matter to you, and honestly I think Joe is ultimately happier because of Joyce.
IntangibleMatter
Aww, Joe.
Maybe you need to have some meaningless sex to help get over the breakup. That never goes wrong.
Dot
Gonna go ahead and bullet point my thoughts here:
*Hope Danny learns soon that Joe got cheated on, because I do not buy for one second that he’d be this chill if he knew already
* I sure hope Sal doesn’t yet know Walky got cheated on, because I don’t like that she’d be this chill about it if she knew!
*Aw, they’re in looooooove
*Good on Joe for keeping that character development and finally admitting out loud that he’s in love with Joyce. You can forgive a lot of someone you’re in love with. Maybe it’s not good for him to be forgiving this much.
Grimey
I agree with you but its possible that Danny and Sal learning about the cheating is going to come at the most inopportune time for Joyce and Dorothy.
…Actually, who really knows besides Sara, Becky, and Billie? Because to this point Dorothy and Joyce seems like it was such a given to the cast, they must all be under the assumption it was all mutual breakups.
Dot
They kind of have to be, because otherwise this friend group is not acting at all like you’d expect a bunch of college kids to react to two members of said friend group cheating on their partners, both of whom are also in the friend group.
Sirksome
I think this is one of those situations where they’re respecting the boundaries of their friend’s business that is entirely the effected people’s choice to talk about and act on. There are definitely at least rumors floating because Raidah, Asma, and Alice have heard the gossip, and I don’t think it would be hard for Sal to figure it out if she hasn’t already, but the subject of relationships and cheating is sensitive and embarrassing so if you’re friends aren’t volunteering the information it can be the best and most supportive move to just tread water instead of shaking things up in someone’s defense.
Miroku2235
Heck, most adult friend groups wouldn’t take the act of two of their number cheating on another two of their number so passively. Most of these characters are seemingly just shrugging their shoulders and going “Being faithful to your partner? Sounds dumb”
Thing 2
Is this a USA thing? I’m perpetually puzzled as to why anyone calls this cheating at all, let alone repeatedly and expecting anger.
yak
What do you call it when you have sex with a person without prior consent from your monogamous partner, Thing 2?
rowan
For some reason the website won’t let me reply to yak, or anyone past here in the comment nesting. I’m with Thing 2, they didn’t fuck until having broken up with their respective partners. They did kiss before the breakups but I think expecting the friend group to be big mad at them on their friends behalf is disproportionate. Show extra sympathy and understanding to the jilted Joe and walk, sure, but it’s really not like an affair
thejeff
@Thing 2: Mostly we call it cheating because the comic itself does. Every time any of the characters talk about, it’s in terms of cheating. Not a single person finding out what happened has said anything like “That was just kissing and you broke up the next day. That doesn’t count.” That would be a valid take, but it hasn’t come up.
Willis has described this as a cheating arc. This all might be partly because of their being uncomfortable with cheating stories, leading to a lower standard for what counts.
zee
@Thing 2 bruh what are you, French?
Big Z
@Thing 2: A lot of it does ride on the technicalities and letter-of-the-law stuff. YMMV (and it obviously does), but it’s been the lived experience of a lot of folks that getting even anywhere close to something that can be described as “cheating” (even, yes, something as weaksauce as “kissing a new partner while still technically ‘dating’ your previous partners without breaking up first, even if the previous relationships were short”) is a huge red flag for a couple of reasons.
–
One, it’s still fundamentally dishonest. If there’s ANY expectation of monogamous behavior, and many of us have argued that in their cultural context there WAS/IS, then stepping out on that is at least arguably cheating.
–
Two, in this modern world of STIs and risk factors, “hooking up with someone else without telling your other partners” is IMHO fundamentally unethical — to abuse a hypothetical, if Dorothy happened to have a barely-noticable cold sore during the protest kiss, suddenly Joe’s unknowingly at risk for genital herpes after the blanket/weenus interaction!
dLileh
Imho, this friends group is exactly behaving as expected if two of their members cheated!
Relationships are a very personal thing. Even if they are very good friends that share intimate details, they will allways miss information about what actually happened and how the cheaters and the cheated feel about the whole thing. Could be that the involved persons don’t want others to make a big fuss out of it. Could be, that the involved don’t want to risk splitting the friends group. Could be, that the ex-couple agreed on being just a fling (so nothing serious). … I could think of a couple more reasons.
It would be insolent to interefer in the relationships of other people in any case.
Dot
It’s not unreasonable if we assume everyone here is a mature adult, but they aren’t! They’re kids! Hormonal young adults who should be having bigger reactions.
Big Z
@dLileh – who says anything about interfering in the relationships of other people? If I discover that someone’s a cheater, I’m not likely to continue to trust them, because by definition cheating involves dishonesty.
–
THEY can manage their relationships however they like, but if they do so in an unethical way I’m going to treat them like an unethical person.
dLileh
@ Big Z: Well, you do you. I would not treat somebody that cheated in a relationship any different in day to day life. Why would I bother how that person behaves in a relationship, if I don’t plan having one with them? I’m way more pissed at people cheating at work or in life in general …
I would probably think a bit longer if I wanted to start a relationship with them, but it’s not a complete “no definately not!” for me. In a real life setting it’s not as simple as “The cheater is bad and the cheated is a poor victim.” There are reasons why cheating happens. Just to name a few:
– Was it a one time thing, that happened because the relationship was already crumbling and fell apart later? -> Take care of the relationship. Talk about the needs and love languages of both of you.
– Is it notorious? -> Some people can’t be monogamous. Don’t try to have a closed relationship with them. Either find an honest way how to be with them or don’t date them.
Don’t get me wrong, I think, that cheating in a relationship is clearly wrong and should be prevented. (Also, I personally never cheated. So this is not me trying to justify anything) I’m a big fan of honesty. And I think that decades of romcoms put a destructively wrong idea of relationships into our minds.
Also, I personally would not count Joyce kissing Dorothy at the demo cheating (I know the comic does, and that’s alright.). It kind of happened in the moment. If she afterwards continues to kiss Dorothy without telling Joe, then I would consider it cheating. But Joe knows about it, so there is no dishonesty here. The only problem I see, is that Dorothy doesn’t know about the limbo-state of Joyces relationship with Joe, so there is some dishonesty towards her.
Thing 2
Zee: Mais non.
The Jeff: So we are required to follow that convention?
Yak: That depends on several things, like Was Walky actually a “Partner”?; has monogamy been established in either case?; why is monogamy assumed if not discussed, as opposed to assuming open?; did anyone ‘have sex’ before talking to previous partner?; does kissing count as ‘having sex’?
I, personally, would not call what happened “cheating”, even if the comic does.
furubatsu
I’m pretty sure Sal is aware that the timeline of Joyce and Dorothy getting together overlaps with Walky being with Dorothy and Sal’s general reaction was “You’ll be in another girls pants by the end of the day dude” (basically she’s not mad on Walky’s behalf because she didn’t think he was serious about Dorothy this time around because he basically got with her a day after he broke up with Lucy like, an in-universe week and a half ago).
Astariel
Even less than that. Dorothy & Walky got back together on Tuesday, and Dorothy & Joyce kissed Saturday of the same week.
Nyzer
Ugh, I hate how the Report Comment button is a one-click thing. Tried to scroll up and reported this one without wanting to.
clif
That’s okay. I’ll report this one to make up for it.
zee
Feels a lot easier to accidentally hit now. Luckily one random report doesn’t matter, only matters when a bunch of people report one comment
Thag Simmons
It’s legitimately fine. There’s a report threshold, it’s not going to get flagged unless there’s multiple reports
yak
It seems pretty unrealistic that they wouldn’t know. It’s literally front page news.
Anna
It’s front page news that Joyce & Dorothy kissed at the protest. Whether Joyce & Dorothy broke up with their partners before or after the protest-kiss is not something covered by the newspaper.
Rimwalker55
[Dot] Bullet point 2: Sal knew before anybody in the dorm except AG https://www.dumbingofage.com/comic/take-stock/ and I’m guessing Dan knew shortly after Sal dropped wounded AG off at her room.
thejeff
As Anna said above, Sal knew they were being more gay than usual, but not when they broke up with their partners. Why would she assume cheating rather than a breakup?
Rimwalker55
She knew they were now a couple and Walky was with Dorothy and Joe was with Joe. Doesn’t take a law degree.
Rimwalker55
oops, Joe with Joyce. Missed it before the timer ran out.
thejeff
But why assume cheating then breakup, rather than breakup then getting together?
I think most people would expect Dorothy at least to do things by the book.
Rosicrucian
While I agree that the degree of deference Joe is giving Joyce is only going to lead to more pain, I think another thing that is factoring in here is Joe has done more than a little unpacking of what led to his initial promiscuity. He’s finally on the other side of some real bad headspace, and he’s liked who he’s becoming. He’s probably pretty wary of backsliding.
apocryphascribe