Book 5 Kickstarter update: We hit $40K which means we can reprint Book 2 (which I am close to running out of)!
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Book 5 Kickstarter update: We hit $40K which means we can reprint Book 2 (which I am close to running out of)!
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Asma appears in NON-Patreon exclusives?! What?!?!
also someone totes subscribed me to Penthouse in college AND sent it to my parents’ house instead
joke’s on them, my parents don’t care, and free porn
Penthouse?
What, were they out of “Black Tail” subscription slips?
*Dodges assorted spiked weaponry*
This is the first story I’ve heard/read about free porn (that’s not on the interenet) that someone didn’t find in the woods.
That’s where we got ours as kids…
Catalogs, sometimes art or photography books/mags, and of course, National Geographic.
Dear JustCheetoDust, you’ll never believe this happened to me…
Asma has begun her invasion into the main cast. First she needs to take out Walky.
Naw, I like Walky. Can she take out Mary?
All in favor say “aye.”
Eye. Oh crap, I screwed it up.
I.
Oops the seems to be some form of Aye infection going around.
So you have a sti in your aye, do you?
Directions unclear, got flute caught in toaster.
Main cast. Mary’s the Starscream at best.
Heck she’s not even Starscream. She’s Terrorsaur.
She’s the considerably-less-omnipotent Q.
Q was too essential. She’s more like Lore.
Please Starscream is more central to the cast a plot of transformers than most of the autobots. A recurring antagonist is still part of the main cast.
Mary’s roughly the investigator trying to pull a fast one on Nyarlathotep. Tampering with forces beyond her reckoning. Probably gonna get eaten by an angry red-headed eldritch horror.
A hypocritical bully that abuses authority is a force beyond one’s reckoning now?
Reality warping would explain how Ruth gets away with being a violent abuser.
…that is harsh.
She took out Blaine! What more do we ask?
http://www.dumbingofage.com/2013/comic/book-3/04-just-hangin-out-with-my-family/removed/
And nicely showed that there aren’t apparently any police officers on campus in this world. I thought maybe she was one, but a police officer wouldn’t be working the mail room.
Hence why I cannot feel bad about Amazi-girl. She’s a citizen stepping in because the police, who should be doing her job, are absent. No wonder she thought she was on her own with Toedad.
(I do want Amber to get better, of course. But I hope she can still protect people–albeit with a more level head, and less unnecessary violence/escalation.)
Well, she did say “I can escort you outside the building or security can”. Whether “security” is actually cops or not, I don’t know, but I think it just means she was the closest thing to an authority figure on the scene. There aren’t cops stationed inside the dorms, certainly.
As for Toedad, there were cops. We even saw Amazi-Girl try to get their attention, but things were moving too fast. They were too busy responding to the reports of a shooting at the fountain, to realize that the crazy girl surfing behind a car on a skateboard was actually in pursuit of the shooter. Which is understandable.
Who pays? Or would they be going Dutch?
If you’re still talking Walky, they split the bill since he’s still with Dorothy.
If you are more current with this thread. Mary pays, and Asma orders two lobsters… minimum.
If she takes out Mary, she’ll have to take her place as a heel though.
Why can they not both be in heels? That way they can collapse into each others arms after they twist their ankles whiles lovingly wrapping their fingers around each others …… oh wait, that’s David Carradine.
Oh, she has that covered.
Just wait till tomorrow, when we see just what’s in that box…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rjRFqMjOOGs.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kLDhMU5JvMk
https://youtu.be/XVMLivHTXac?t=2m7s
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YocGAaz6AbM&t=23m56s
I am perpetually SO disappointed the Shatner parody never ended up on the Se7en release (or, that I never found out which one has it, if it did)
I’ve never seen it, I only know the Shatner ending. XD
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mI-YiaWDgB4
I thought she was at the beginning of the comic, though.
at least we know your name asma
What’s her last name, Deus?
badumtss.wav
Asma Badumtsswav does have a ring to it…
Abbasi?
Inhaler has a ring to it.
Assuming she’s Arabic, she will not have a last name per se.
Panel 3 : yep, you self centered prick~
Has he never heard of the Asmaverse? It spanned 4 different webcomics!
I know, it’s such a great little moment, because he’s being a total smug prick in Panel 2, like, oh, I’m so regularly receiving packages I’ve bought or been sent by rich parents that you should know me… what, you’re calling me out on that and demonstrating that I don’t at all treat the “help” with even the decency to remember their names? Oh fuck.
It’s just a great character moment and reminds me why I look forward to Asma comics.
To be fair, he probably never knew her name, although she probably would’ve seen his name on his packages. I mean on one hand, he probably could’ve asked her name at some point, but he probably just wanted a more personal interaction instead of something so business, knowing Walky’s slacker nature. I know I don’t commit half the people I know’s names to memory. There’s people I talk to on a daily basis that I couldn’t tell you what their name is.
I partly think the only reason why some of us here know her name is we can see her name tag. There doesn’t appear to be one in-universe and they don’t have any overlapping social circles. IT’s like him expecting to know the name of the person that gives him McNuggets.
Ok, he probably knows their name. My point should still stand.
I hope that, if I was in the situation of seeing the same desk clerk several times a day and having direct dealings with them often, I would have had the courtesy to at least eventually find out their name. I freely admit that I’m not always as good in this area as I should but I certainly wouldn’t expect them to know me as more than ‘hey, you’ if I hadn’t gone that extra mile.
I mean Ideally yes. It’s one of those things you’d probably want to do. But it’s REAL easy to not do that for extended periods of time. Like the girl at my school’s cage who scans my ID so I can get lab passes and tablets. She’d know my name cuz she has to look at it whenever she scans my thing. But I’ve yet to ask her name or even hold a conversation with her for any length of time. That being said she’s more likely to call me by my name than by 636747
My dad and I shop in a large Sainsbury’s supermarket that serves thousands of customers on a weekly basis. We’re also on reciprocal first name terms with both our regular checkout lady and the girl on the customer services desk. On weeks when my dad’s away running a Scout camp, they even ask me where he’s gotten to, which is nice. 🙂
In an age where such big companies are trying to reduce customers to statistics in their computers to be analysed to predict our shopping habits, it’s nice to still get on with the employees on a personal level. 🙂
I see the lady at the cafeteria who gives me hot chocolate and sandwiches all the time. She seems like a nice lady. But her purpose in my life is to give me hot chocolate and sandwiches in exchange for money. I have no particular need to use up brain juice memorizing her name when I’m so terrible with names I don’t even remember some of my classmates’ ones after a semester.
Hello hot chocolate and sandwich lady. I would like a hot chocolate and a sandwich. Thank you. Goodbye!
That was almost flirting, Walky.
Hopefully, Dorothy won’t kill Asma for that, then.
Are you implying Dorothy won’t want a three-way? Any good president needs at least one college scandal.
I think she counts Walky as her college scandal
The scandallier the better!
Actually, Walky is the opening bookend to the college scandal. After that is the enabling of that notorious urban vigilante who has made such headlines by ‘cleaning up’ inner-city Indianapolis (making the Chief of Police and DA look so incompetent in the process), drunken antics in the dormitories and associating with that redheaded woman who has become such a hate figure to the Fundamentalist end of the electorate amongst many other juicy little adventures.
The spin doctors who thought that this would destroy her ended up being major polling positives. It turns out that the electorate hate people whose lives are basically a sheet of bland grey or beige.
Nah, Becky will be her Secretary of the Interior, if you get my drift.
Dorothy doesn’t seem like the type who would mind a little harmless flirting.
SPOILER ALERT!
Becky is in the box.
I don’t think she and Dina have gotten that far.
No, Dina. She was so overly adorable that Mike tried to mail her to Abu Dhabi. But then he realized that would cost a fortune in postage, so he figured mailing her to Walky would be bad enough.
So Mike is basically Garfield?
We won’t know until we open it.
What’s left of her that is.
that makes asma even more amazing, being able to deadlift well over 100 pounds.
Has anyone in a comic strip or cartoon ever held a box with a “this end up” arrow the right way? I’m beginning to think the arrows exist just so fictional characters can ignore them.
I know you meant that as a rhetorical comment but http://www.itswalky.com/comic/joe-at-home-for-christmas/
It’s not that I can’t believe that an exception exists, but the fact that you found it within 3 minutes scares me a little bit.
It’s almost like someone could search for it and then go back in time to post.
Or that it’s a years long running gag.
with great gravatars comes great, uhhh, box cross referencing skills? i got nothing
“I’m not what you would call a ‘creative’ thinker.”
IKR? You can’t even imagine a searchable database of transcripts for all comics to explain this one.
… I now suspect Ana (and other aliases) of being a strong AI, here to be subjected to informal Turing testing, so well designed that its only “tell” is freakishly swift posting and research.
But I can imagine a Google search of Willis comics and the phrase “box pointing up” getting results in a matter of seconds. In the case of IW! you get Joe (above), and with SP! it’s Leslie holding a box.
That’s an open box, it doesn’t count.
see NOW I want someone to have been GENUINELY creative and had the arrow pointing TO THE LEFT OR RIGHT
Speaking as the guy who receives a lot of packages at work, I can assure you that the couriers ignore them too.
^This. Try to get the USPS, FedEx or UPS to pay attention to those arrows. I dare you. 😐
They pay attention. It’s not just random chance having them all upside down.
I almost thought Asma was trying to talk to Becky, but calling her Beck-3 for some strange reason..
That’s her DJ name.
Only according to fanon. In canon it’s Vinyl Becks.
(Oh, god, I not only thought of an MLP joke, I actually made it. Damn you TV Tropes!)
Being a collector, I can tell you no, plenty of merch has started calling her DJ Pon-3, which annoys the piss out of me because there’s no good way to pronounce it. It is the year of our lord two thousand and sixteen, and goddammit, I refuse to say “pwn” ever again.
Fucking Becky clones I swear.
The worst was that stupid one in the sleeveless hoodie that tried to convince the real Becky that she was the clone.
“Execute order 67.”
You sure you’re not mixing that up with Order 69?
Nah, watch this and you’ll see.
You wish.
I’m sad we will never have a Becky in Beck wing joke
You sure? Maybe she’ll wind up effectively living with a boy after all this…
(As a former fundie, I admit I still hold the sex-before-marriage thing to be important [if less important than before–I’m not gonna go to hell, but I prefer the commitment], but maybe she won’t.)
Nonono. Walky’s major in telecommunications, plus all around wacky hi-jinx, will have him be the 4th host of the Glenn Beck show.
*Insert healthcare commercial about customers being more than a number*
Honestly, I’d rather just be a number with data. Work is more efficient for both ends that way. It’s simply less stressful and more productive.
*plays “Please Mister Postman” on the hacked Muzak* (Which version, I’ll leave to you. There are like dozens.)
Also a good choice.
*followed by Corey Hart’s “Boy In The Box”*
k guys we’re going now
Yeah. The gang’s taking a break now. We’ll see you all soon!
Unfortunately, this is true. Amazi-Girl and I have to get back to OC so we can save the existence crisis that plagues the fictional world!
Don’t ask.
yea i’m still reeding
labelling in the dumbiverse indicates this side down!
Labeling in the dumbiverse indicates Asma holds a grudge!
Her name is Asma
NSFW
Oh you…
New OTP!
Ah the next pornographique….
Still better than the one with Mary and Carla.
The “One”.
Oh, Mr. K, I don’t know how to tell you this…
Can you please show me all of em?
Nooooope. Not for Dumbing of Agers or Tumbls.
Dude, how depraved can they be. You’ve already had outright porn. I’m kinda scared to ask
The “One” is probably not for the faint of heart.
Let’s just say there’s things I’m fine with people associating with me and things I’m not.
Plus I don’t want any unecessary drama.You’ve got… mail
Hey guys what’d I-
…
…
…
Welp, see ya’ next Thursday.
Inhaler?
Inhaler? I hardly knew ‘er!
If she punches someone, is that an Asma Attack?
-1 intertnet
actually pretty funny
Yes, she will punch you so hard, you will be gasping for breath.
If she gets bitten by a parasitic arachnid is that an Asma tick?
Caaarlooos
As opposed to an Asma tic which is what we call her idiosyncrasies.
I don’t like that pun Asma-ch.
Did her Walkyverse version use plasma weapons in SEMME?
Come on, Walky, it’s right there in the tags.
She’s got a name, now? Damn.
She had that name for a few years now.
I’m willing to bet she’s had one since she was born.
Maybe even before she was born.
Maybe even before this universe was conceived.
Which if we assume the speed of the passage of time in Dumbing of Age has stayed consistent even before the first comic, was some time before the Big Bang.
Hey plasma you changed your gravitas, I was starting to get worried.
Gravatar…fucking auto correct
A new Culture ship name?
Culture ship names are the future version of gay porn names, but much more amusing. RIP Iain Banks.
ITYM RIP Iain M. Banks. Iain Banks was the name for his non-SF work.
[/nerd_nitpicking]
Well, they can both RIP.
Asuka is his One True Gravatar.
When I was in Navy boot camp, my parents sent me a birthday cake. After a couple of transfers, it caught up with me about 4 months later.
who wants to bet it’s some terrible thing from Mike?
It’s Dorothy’s corpse.
It’s Walky’s corpse.
It’s Mr. Monkey’s corpse.
nooooooooooooooooooooooo
C’mon guys, it’s obviously Walky’s mom is in the box…and a nickel.
Well this took a dark turn.
Didn’t realise how creepy that sounds at first, I’m a complete idiot.
I got so many packages in college that the post peeps actually knew me by name and box number. I’d walk by the glass doors and they’d already have my things ready to go when I waltzed in. I…never knew their names myself…welp…
All I receive is a glare and a simple statement of “you”. This is mainly because I completely forgot two weeks into freshman year that my college had a post office, and that I had a PO box. They haven’t forgiven me for having six months worth of Time magazine in said box by the time I finally remembered.
Well, to be fair, after six months, it was about Time.
Some People…
The people who got me my packages were named “aditi” and “bryan with a y”. I remember their names, hair color, hair type, clothing style, and accents but not ther faces. It’s weird how memories work.
That face in panel 3 is priceless. That wonderful deer-in-the-headlights pose is just to hilarious. And the way his eyes just shrink…I haven’t laughed this hard in at least a month.
In Walky’s defence, i doubt HER name is written on any package that he loijs at regularly…
Looks at… Stupid phone keyboard hates me
Turn on Autocorrect! That will make everything better!
‘In Walking’s deference, i debit HAIR namor is wartime on eeny penis that hir looks ate religiously…’
but it could be 😉
GEE, I wonder what Walky-tastic shenanagins are we getting into today?
*Shenanigans
*Starscream
*Synonym
I had to read the tags to remember her name.
🙁
I was close. “Is it Asla? Azra? Something like that?”
I never knew it. I’ve only seen her once before, and that was before I knew about the tags. And, even now, I rarely check them–only when I forget a character’s name. And that’s usually a character not in the current comic.
A box that size will hold a lot of pajama jeans.
I love that we thought of the same thing haha.
Looks like the cat is out of the box
Walky tomorrow: “Why did someone mail me a dead cat!?”
Maybe it’s Schrödinger’s cat and if Walky never opens it, he will never know. HE WILL NEVER KNOW.
“Walky, why does your room smell awful?”
“We can never know, Dorothy. WE CAN NEVER KNOW.”
Instead of pajama jeans, box contained bobcat.
Would not order again.
….every math exam from the past ten years? With answer keys?
Thanks, Jason.
She looks very different from her previous appearances. She’s obviously curvy when she’s taking to Blaine, for example, and in earlier appearances, but here she’s very thin. I actually wondered if she was a different Muslim clerk (or whatever her proper title is).
All Ramen diet is physically catching up to her and now she’s perpetually starving.
That was three real-world years ago. Willis’s style has changed…not a lot, but the big heads were still a thing back then, frex.
Is it more pajama jeans? Whoa. Throwback.
Maybe they are special edition or something.
He’ll have one for every day of the week.
Box that size is every day of the month.
Pajama Jean, the late Elvis Edition.
It is Thursday, after all…
No, it’s a large industrial-size drum of aloe vera for the burn that Asma just gave Walky.
I’m really having trouble guessing what might be in that box.
Asma’s back taxes joke is excellent. Why back taxes? Why that specific adult thing? I never would have thought of back taxes.
I laughed out loud at the punch line here, and I don’t usually do that. Perhaps I’m just especially amused by back taxes.
Indiana charges taxes on backs? What don’t they tax?
Sir Mixalot will be displeased.
It’s little-known that Sir Mixalot was one of the 150,000,000 Republican candidates for president this year. Unfortunately, his platform of “Baby Got Tax” didn’t take off…
It’s a box of even tinier boxes.
It never ends
Never ends
Maybe at some point it will.
(no, it won’t
“Yo dawg I heard you like boxes. So we put boxes in a box so you can open box while you open box!”
“Shipping costs gonna’ be a pain in the ass on this one!”
I’ll put in in a tiny little box, and I’ll put that box in another box! Then I’ll mail that box to myself and when it gets here?!? I’ll smash it with a hammer!!!
It’s a box with an even smaller box in it. And inside that box is an even smaller box and in that one there’s a chimichanga.
And a Deadpool action figure.
I see someone has employed the Infinite Monkeys Packaging Co. Again.
Come on, Wally. Learn the girl’s name. Actually, have we ever seen anyone at the front desk besides Asma? At my residence hall, there are different people who work the desk, and I know some of their names. I also know the names of some of the maintenance staff. But, not everyone’s names, just the names of people I interact with a lot.
That feels like something that an be ignored in favor of not over complicating the story too much.
Deliberate or typo?
Typo…which sadly I can’t edit. -.-
There are several Asmas who work the front desk, it’s like Patton Oswalt as Agent Koenig on Agents of SHIELD.
I dunno. Some people don’t like it when you get too familiar with them when they are just doing their job. And there’s often not a natural place to ask someone their name–especially after you’ve seen them a few times. And then there’s the problem that some people seem to think you’re flirting to them if you talk to them–and the people in religious attire seem to be the worst at this.
I guess he could say “Hey, I’ve been here enough times. You can call me Walky.” and seeing if she gives her name. Or, I guess he could have just asked here. “Oh, crap! I never learned your name, did I?”
(Also, is “Walky” really on his packages? It would be weird writing “Walky Walkerton” on forms–though I guess, considering Walky, that’s a reason he might do it. )
I’d assume he’d use his given name for that so I’d say his packages say David W or something like that.
I’m like Walky, I never get important mail!
*shoves important mail into a pile and looks away*
I like her
tie your shoes walky
Maybe Dorothy likes it when he wears something lacy.
It makes him look more sassy.
Wasn’t there a thing about not releasing actual room names, since ‘oh hey, these are actual rooms that people are staying in right now’? That was why Sal gave such odd directions for Danny to find her room.
That that’s necessary seriously scares me.
Beck 3 isn’t a room name.
I know Beck is the dorm wing, what’s the 3 mean?
It’s the floor number.
And yeah, Sal said she was on Clark 3 and to look up her number in the directory, if I remember correctly.
is she gonna be a character? i want her to be a character
She’s been a (very minor background) character since 2010. (5 proper appearances, plus 2 more where she’s just a silhouette. Plus a Patreon bonus strip focused on her, IIRC.)
YRC.
topical statement is topical!
You know, I’d really love to see a ‘Day in the Life’ chapter for Asma. With all the weird and eccentric personalities in Beck Centre, she must have a really interesting (or frustrating) working life!
Mike took all of Walky’s Fs from math and had them blown up into posters, then mailed them to him.
The thing is… that’s the sort of thing Mike would do even if it was horribly expensive. On a certain level, you have to admire his puritan work ethic and personal dedication to the principle of making other people miserable.
I wonder if someone could make a living from that…rememebr that glitterbomb service from a while ago?
The box is full of Jack Daniels for Billie to take the pain away.
And full of regret for Ruth.
Why do I think that Walky is gonna get the dreaded AP letter from her soon?
Hey, Willis! SITE ISSUE!
The Latest button isn’t working right. I had to click it three times. Once on “ohhoho”, once on “replaced”, and once on “outabout.” Only “outabout” points correctly to “name-2.” I didn’t go through every comic, but I did check and see that the first comic does correctly point to “name-2.”
I did a Ctrl-F5 refresh, so I know the problem is not on my end. Your older comics aren’t getting the “Latest” button as they are supposed to.
It works fine here, so the problem is on your end. If it’s not your local browser cache, maybe your ISP is caching stuff upstream of you.
Love the details – Like Walky’s untied shoes. This side up on the box. Asma channeling her inner Sarah with the side eye.
The first panel, it looks like Red Charlie Dick on the sign.
actually, walky, some of us were getting spam from charities and politicians we’d sent signed petitions to long before we were eighteen. so take that, i guess.
Francis
I hope the box holds a large economy-size container of aloe vera for that huge burn Walky just got from Asma.
I KNOW HER NAME!
It’s ……
Asma.
To be fair though, she doesn’t seem to wear a name tag.
Sorry if I’ve missed it above, but how can Asma not know Walky’s name? How does she know this box goes to him if she doesn’t? Does it have his picture on it? Did someone else sort the packages by wing, floor, and possibly room?
Is Asma just being passive-aggressive by calling Walky “Beck 3” because she resents his not learning her name yet?
Or has she learned that saying “Hey David Walkerton!” doesn’t get a response, and she doesn’t know his nickname?
I don’t get the Beck 3 thing.
Walky (and the other core boys) live on the 3rd floor of Beck wing. (The core girls live on Clark 3.)
“core boys” – band name, or porno series?
Actually the boyband would be Boy Core… Or Boycore… or Boy Corps.
Coreboys: it’s like choirboys, but not
Yay, more Asma!
Am I the only one who hopes it contains the bottom of blender?
Yes?
Got it.
You need the top half, too, or this plan only ends with Starscream using you to shoot his dick off.
So it’s a win/win for me.
If you count being shoved up Starscream’s dick hole as a win, I’m not gonna judge.
now I want it to have that, too
(also y’all should know there’s a joke here)
A couple of them.
Does anyone else hope the box will be a transmogrifier by tomorrow? http://www.gocomics.com/calvinandhobbes/1987/03/23
You mean in two months?
In Walky’s defense, his name is written on the packages. Hers isn’t.
Also: Holy crap, I can actually comment now.