Welcome to the saga of the working-class adventurer! Enjoy the complete story with new annotations daily!
Paint the Town Red
Windy, Winter Jay Kiakas
Winona runs a werewolf shelter with partner in crime, Odile in the Gothic city of Merlot. One day they take in an injured vampire, and soon unravels many of the dark secrets of Merlot.
Cyanide & Happiness
Explosm
Satire, dark humor and surreal humor.
Hemlock
Josceline Fenton
A witch accidentally marries a monster, and now she and her familiar has to navigate life around her monstrous husband and her even more terrifying in-laws.
All Known Alternatives
Karolina 'Kajotko' Jankiewicz
Akane has only one way to get back home: collect the 42 keys to parallel worlds. Eri and Ben are just trying to get through the summer before university. When a magical key turns up in an old spare set, all three are forced to change their plans and fast.
Dumbing of Age
David M Willis
Joyce has been homeschooled her entire life until now, when she's suddenly a freshman in college! Things don't go well.
No End
Erli, Kromi
A queer romance about people attempting to build lives in a cold, post-apocalyptic world ravaged by hordes of undead.
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My dad’s the same, supports an absolutely shitty football team (Sunderland) but woe betide anyone who suggests he switch allegiances…doubly so to the local rivals (Newcastle).
The same is true of just about all sports fans all over the world.
Although in this specific case, I see a highly possibility of this rapidly turning into another Slipshine moment. ;DDD
to be honest i kinda freeked out about your comment becuase i know that feeling except my dad supports newcastle over sunderland but i dont know why they have such a big rivalry and cant just be friends. oh and i also freeked out about the fact you mentoined places in britain and newcastle
In my admittedly limited experience, it’s largely for fun; rivalry can be a cathartic outlet for negative emotions. I’m a Giants fan, and I’m repulsed by the idea of supporting the Dodgers, but I wouldn’t dream of hurting someone over the rivalry. It gives both sides someone to cheerfully hate without it amounting to anything, so long as no one gets extra stupid and escalates.
Arousal was just the raising of any thing feeling or not. Interest, curiosity, consciousness (as in from sleep, or a ponderous ‘zoned out state’), for border line examples.
Dunno if your joking, but this is 100% true. This pair has discovered that antagonizing each other is a mutual and enormous turn on. See the slipshine (which incidentally is where my gravatar comes from, though the naughty bits have been carefully removed from view).
Ah, memories. I remember when there were only two Canadian teams in the NHL, the Leafs and the Canadiens, now there are also the Senators, the Flames, and the Canucks…
I live in Edmonton, and we’ve forgotten the Oilers. Because the Oilers suck hard. And have sucked hard for a long time. Gretzky’s departure was the death of the team.
I’m lucky. Live in Ottawa, grew up in Ottawa and the Sens started playing when I was four so they’ve been my lifelong team. That being said I always root for the Canadian teams.
What happened to the Edmonton Oilers (Gretzky’s team)?
And Billie obviously knows jack about hockey. Calling the Senators a winning team? They’re the NHL version of the Minnesota Vikings — the only way either team is going to get into a championship game is if they buy tickets.
Yup. Caused a huuuuge outcry. I remember there being a semi-serious movement to get him declared a National Treasure so he couldn’t be traded to the Americans.
I’m not sure Canada has fully forgiven him for heading south, although we’re a lot quieter and more resigned about it these days.
Don’t forget the disasterous partial season in 96, when he came to St. Louis, costing us 3 players and 2 draft picks, never clicked with Brett Hull, and played horrific defense, giving away the series clinching goal that got us knocked out of the playoffs.
The Sens are alright, not great, not abysmal (have three extremely talented netminders, which is never a bad thing), but yeah, I was a bit taken aback by that selection, too, especially with the Habs not only being, probably, the Leafs’ biggest historical rival and also being very good most of the time.
I know Willis doesn’t want to make it a period piece, but the Sens being good is in much bigger flux than the Habs being good.
Even so, if that’s the biggest complaint I have about Willis’s storytelling (it is), I’m obviously enjoying the comic.
.. and not a losing Team either …. the Leafs I mean … They fail at failure.
Mind you they are backed by the two Media giants who don’t give a rodents hind quarters about them winning or losing as long as they have the Media rights tied up for the League.
Billie should know Canucks are like Sharks when their teams pride is at stake. Conversation can be Jetting along; then Lightning strikes and you’re a sitting Duck in the path of an Avalanche.
Billie is attracted to Ruth’s Predatory nature, and can be pretty Wild herself. Still that little Devil better watch Ruth’s mood like a Black Hawk or instead of being rocked like a Hurricane she will be seeing Stars with a case of the Blues.
Someone took a grapefruit and wore it like a hat
A couple a’my buddies were under the kitchen table
Talkin’ to my ol’ tomcat
They were talkin’ ’bout hockey
The cat was talkin’ back
Round about then everything went black–but
Wasn’t That A Party?!
Not to a Leafs fan, them’s fighting words. When I was living up there (back when those were the only two Canadian teams) people were literally killed for that.
Hrm, I’m a bit worried something else is going on here; Ruth looks pretty disturbed in 4 and 6, and I’d think Billie’s comments would just make her angry.
I read it as a combination of shock and surprised. Ruth is shocked Billie would promote the Sens to her like this, and surprised she knows enough about hockey to know it’d get under her skin. And THEN she gets mad.
I agree with commenters above: it looks like Billie’s learned a bit about hockey specifically to tease Ruth.
Two things to understand:
1) Billie is deliberately provoking Ruth to anger, ’cause she finds that frickin’ hot. For these two, rage is the fastest route to sexytimes.
2) Billie has found Ruth gets very emotional about her Leafs. As Billie is a Sens fan, this is an easy subject to provoke her with.
Stupid question: Why exactly would Ruth get fired if they were found out? I mean, she’s a student too, right? Just because she’s an RA, does that mean she can’t have a relationship with another student?
It does in fact mean that she can’t have a relationship with a student on her floor, because she’s in a position of authority over them. If Billie moved to a different dorm they could bang all they want and no one could say anything about it.
At least not legitimately. It probably wouldn’t stop Mary from mouthing off, but she wouldn’t be able to get Ruth in trouble with the administration over it.
(“Murder was in fact a fairly uncommon event in Ankh-Morpork, but there were a lot of suicides. Walking in the night-time alleyways of The Shades was suicide. Asking for a short in a dwarf bar was suicide. Saying ‘Got rocks in your head?’ to a troll was suicide. You could commit suicide very easily, if you weren’t careful.”)
Supposedly there is a term for when someone provokes a fight with law enforcement that winds up with deadly force being employed known as “suicide by cop”. I guess “assisted suicide by RA” isn’t entirely out of the question.
But 0-0 would either mean that both teams really sucked, or that both teams were really awesome. If the latter, you’d still end up with a really entertaining game despite no one actually scoring.
But you are forgetting that for a lot of “Fans” that it is not about how the game is played but by how big the scores are or the points spread …… Explains why Basketball is more popular than Football aka Soccer.
As a Leafs fan, gotta say, I’ve been loving the recent strips, and am amused that your Indiana folks are as up to date with their Leafs jokes as your average Canadian.
Since I’ve been lured into commenting, gotta say two things. First, cheer on a winning team? If you wanted a winning team, you wouldn’t cheer for the Leafs in the first place. Also, if you want a winning team, then you aren’t really a fan either. It’s the mindless love in the face of constant defeat that makes a true fan.
Secondly, the Sens?! THE SENS?!
Take her femurs and beat her mostly to death because death is too good for her, Ruthless!
Eh, see but the Sens can actually beat the worst team in the NHL. Though the Leafs have only split the series, which is a little disappointing because the Sabres can usually count on winning that and seeing the Leaf fans’ angry disappointed faces as they leave First Niagara Center gives me life.
Mostly because that’s pretty much the only time in recent years where I can leave without feeling horribly depressed but YOU KNOW.
(Also I went through and counted and y’all aren’t doing as bad as Montreal vs the Sabres, so you have that over them).
Joe MIGHT. He seems extremely uncomfortable with his sexual orientation. He’s always having to assert it, almost like he’s making sure everyone knows he fucks chicks. But I dunno, I might be reading into it a lot more than necessary. Him and Danny though? I don’t think either of them would be down. It might feel like incest for them.
I’d go with Jacob. Of the characters we know right now, I’ll go with Danny, Ethan, and Jacob.
I have a feeling if Joe got hit on by guys – good looking ones – he’d be flaunting it. ‘The J-Man’s that good that he got dudes like THAT to want a piece of him.’
The 3 Dudes option does not mean he has a plan for a 3 dudes slipshine, it’s just gauging where people’s mindsets are at in terms of subsequent pornings.
It’d be a shame if their turned on-ness has a parallel exponential growth with their hornyness. They’d end up killing each other as the ultimate sex play.
Oh, Billie. Ruth does care about you, but you’re talking heresy. I’m not sure even your wiles can get you out of being scourged & purged.
…oh hell, now I’m gonna interpret Astarte’s warcries lewdly.
As someone from Toronto… this is legit how people will react. I honestly don’t care for hockey all that much. It doesn’t really matter to me who wins, so long as it’d be a Canadian team. However, to quote my hardcore Leafs fan of an older sister and the conversation we had…
Me: “The Leafs are never in the playoffs. Why not just cheer for Montreal/Ottawa/any other Canadian team?”
Sister (with wide eyes of death): “No. They’re our rivals. They have to lose. Don’t ever say something so stupid again.”
I would find Billie’s cattiness much more adorable if I didn’t think it was caused partly by the two bottles of booze from yesterday.
You are right, Ruth, that discretion would be a smart move – but it’s awfully late in the game for you to demand discretion, miss pigtails-in-inkwells.
i believe we touched on this the other day. Billie is wearing the Leafs shirt; Ruthless has a ringer T-shirt that appears to be in Toronto colors, but it is not a Leafs shirt specifically.
It’s sad that I know how Ruth feels, but in an American football sense. I’m a huge Cincinnati Bengals fan and people can’t help but give me crap when they find out.
Fourth generation Packer fan. Yes, your team matters. Bears are rivals, Lions and Vikings are just teams you like to beat. But I’ll watch the Bears just to see them suck. There are even several songs, a chant and an abbreviation (tbss) that are quite common. Plus, Bears fans are FIBs.
Billie may be pushing Ruth too far here. Or they may end up walking out after switching jerseys during hot sex and not notice it. Though Mary will.
Long-time Packer fan myself here too. You could actually draw a diagonal line from roughly Green Bay to Dubuque IA, and as a general rule the “hated team” depends on which side of this line you find yourself. Fans who find themselves to the south and east of this line generally all hate “da Bears”, and anyone north and west of the line feel that even if the Pack goes 2-14, as long as those two wins were against the Minnesota Viqueens it was a good season.
No, telling her to switch to the Montreal Canadiens would have been pushing Ruth to far. Always been a huge rivalry between Montreal and Toronto in hockey.
oof, it took me a moment to figure out that the perspective completely flips between the first and second panels. the slow turn confused me because it looked like she was turning to look outside of the room.
I’m torn between wanting these two to work things out together and building a 300 mile wall between them that can only be passed by undergoing sobriety tests and years of therapy.
Their relationship is not one of their problems, but their problems are not helped by their relationship. MAYBE their relationship might be the path to a solution to some of their problems. Maybe.
OK I have lived in places where these were the NHL “home teams”: Leafs, Bruins, Kings, Mighty Ducks, Ducks, Stars, Predators, Flames (they used to be in Atlanta), and not in the NHL, the Golden Eagles. I still have a Golden Eagles souvenir puck someplace. We moved around a lot when I was a kid.
Ruth’s gonna need some ointment for that burn (in Billie’s defense, the Maple Leaf’s do suck….the only team worse would probably be Edmonton Oilers….like my sister cheers for….they are constantly the last team or second last team in the Western Conference)
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Deathing of Billie
Ruth’s kinda asking for it, though, admitting she’s the one Leafs fan
My dad’s the same, supports an absolutely shitty football team (Sunderland) but woe betide anyone who suggests he switch allegiances…doubly so to the local rivals (Newcastle).
The same is true of just about all sports fans all over the world.
Although in this specific case, I see a highly possibility of this rapidly turning into another Slipshine moment. ;DDD
I think I’d get disowned if I expressed support for Sunderland…especially on the eve of the derby!
to be honest i kinda freeked out about your comment becuase i know that feeling except my dad supports newcastle over sunderland but i dont know why they have such a big rivalry and cant just be friends. oh and i also freeked out about the fact you mentoined places in britain and newcastle
In my admittedly limited experience, it’s largely for fun; rivalry can be a cathartic outlet for negative emotions. I’m a Giants fan, and I’m repulsed by the idea of supporting the Dodgers, but I wouldn’t dream of hurting someone over the rivalry. It gives both sides someone to cheerfully hate without it amounting to anything, so long as no one gets extra stupid and escalates.
Switching allegiance carries the implication that you never really had any.
but it wont be death, just great anger sex
en.wikipedia.org/la_petit_mort
Sod.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Little_death
Billie has interesting taste in foreplay, doesn’t she?
I think it’s working actually.
Fear is a closely related feeling to arousal, I once heard.
And anger or really any situation where emotions are high.
“Arousal” is actually just another word for “high emotion”. It’s an example of how a word comes to mean a specific case of itself.
I take it then, from your Gravatar, that Glasso is aroused?
Agitated, anyway.
Arousal was just the raising of any thing feeling or not. Interest, curiosity, consciousness (as in from sleep, or a ponderous ‘zoned out state’), for border line examples.
Cue the epic hate(?)fuck. XD
frustrationfuck, closely related, but less volatile.
Oh yeah, baby, your descending into inchoate rage really turns me on…
S-S SENS GNNN MURDER RRRHH
Autoerotic asphyxiation? That’s SO HOT! gkk…
AKA Murderfuck
It’s not “auto” erotic if someone else is doing it to you. It’s also probably not erotic if you’re dead by the end.
This is what happens when both girls in the relationship are the tsundere. I apologize for speaking anime in my previous sentence.
Better tsun than yan.
Don’t knock a yandere till you’ve met one.
Then, be very careful what you say, because there’s a good chance she’s listening.
Seriously, though, stalkers are odd to have.
Dunno if your joking, but this is 100% true. This pair has discovered that antagonizing each other is a mutual and enormous turn on. See the slipshine (which incidentally is where my gravatar comes from, though the naughty bits have been carefully removed from view).
They may not wanna do that in Billie’s room, tho. Her roommate may come back in.
“Ruth: “You’re gonna get pucked!”
Ha! Yes! Go Sens. Awesome. Love it.
Ah, memories. I remember when there were only two Canadian teams in the NHL, the Leafs and the Canadiens, now there are also the Senators, the Flames, and the Canucks…
you forgot the Jets
Knew I was forgetting somebody…
Ouch, the Oilers still don’t make the list…
They’ve been verboten ever since they gave Gretzky to the Yanks.
I live in Edmonton, and we’ve forgotten the Oilers. Because the Oilers suck hard. And have sucked hard for a long time. Gretzky’s departure was the death of the team.
and the Oilers
I’m lucky. Live in Ottawa, grew up in Ottawa and the Sens started playing when I was four so they’ve been my lifelong team. That being said I always root for the Canadian teams.
Well ‘cept the Leafs obviously.
You said Canadian, its silently understood that excludes Toronto.
What happened to the Edmonton Oilers (Gretzky’s team)?
And Billie obviously knows jack about hockey. Calling the Senators a winning team? They’re the NHL version of the Minnesota Vikings — the only way either team is going to get into a championship game is if they buy tickets.
Uh… granted they are not great right now but aside form the Canucks they are the last Canadian team to make it to the cup.
You mean the L.A. Kings? Or are we talking a different Gretzky?
Wayne Gretzky — played with Edmonton from 1979 – 1988 — before being traded to the Kings (and later finished his career with the Rangers).
Sorry, I forgot the snark tag /s
Yup. Caused a huuuuge outcry. I remember there being a semi-serious movement to get him declared a National Treasure so he couldn’t be traded to the Americans.
I’m not sure Canada has fully forgiven him for heading south, although we’re a lot quieter and more resigned about it these days.
Don’t forget the disasterous partial season in 96, when he came to St. Louis, costing us 3 players and 2 draft picks, never clicked with Brett Hull, and played horrific defense, giving away the series clinching goal that got us knocked out of the playoffs.
(Yes, I’m still a little bitter about that.)
The Sens are alright, not great, not abysmal (have three extremely talented netminders, which is never a bad thing), but yeah, I was a bit taken aback by that selection, too, especially with the Habs not only being, probably, the Leafs’ biggest historical rival and also being very good most of the time.
I know Willis doesn’t want to make it a period piece, but the Sens being good is in much bigger flux than the Habs being good.
Even so, if that’s the biggest complaint I have about Willis’s storytelling (it is), I’m obviously enjoying the comic.
Hey, the Vikings have gotten the Superbowl several times!!! We’ve just never won… Or been back in 38 years…
SENS, totally not the #1 rival of the Leafs, nor a winning team.
.. and not a losing Team either …. the Leafs I mean … They fail at failure.
Mind you they are backed by the two Media giants who don’t give a rodents hind quarters about them winning or losing as long as they have the Media rights tied up for the League.
They could play to an empty arena, sell no tickets at all, and still be a hugely profitable team.
They’re so cute when they’re flirting.
Ya flirting , threatening and flirting.
Billie just wants to spend some time in Ruth’s “penalty box’.
Things will be smoothed over in about 10 minutes.
Things will be smoothed over in about 10 minutes.
10 minutes? That’s a bit short. One would think that college-age folk would have more stamina…
It has to be short. Sport-related anger sex can’t last too long or it becomes pure anger and less sex.
Plus it’s morning and those pancakes won’t eat themselves, eh?
Stamina, we have, but we also have other stuff to take care of. One has to prioritize.
Ruth’s gonna Zamboni her.
At first I thought you said “Ruth has Zamboni hair.” Then I tried to image what that would look like.
a flat-top, of course.
Sens-less antagonism. Billie’s just digging herself in deeper.
She just can’t Leaf it alone.
She’s rubbing the oil of her routine in deep.
It’s all part of their passion’s Flames.
Yeah, leave it to Billy to Bruin everything.
Come on, Ruth should be HABituated to Billy’s teasing by now.
Billie should know Canucks are like Sharks when their teams pride is at stake. Conversation can be Jetting along; then Lightning strikes and you’re a sitting Duck in the path of an Avalanche.
Billie is attracted to Ruth’s Predatory nature, and can be pretty Wild herself. Still that little Devil better watch Ruth’s mood like a Black Hawk or instead of being rocked like a Hurricane she will be seeing Stars with a case of the Blues.
I’m bushed!
Ruth is gonna to stick it to her real good.
A slap-shot to the back of Bilie’s net! And Ruth scores!
Out comes the Zamboni to smooth it all down. Ah.
Anyone sensible follows the Canucks.
And then has a sensible reaction when they lose the Stanley Cup.
NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
Problem is, nobody sensible lives in B.C.
I knew I liked that province for a reason.
Billie, you really should Leaf Ruth’s favourite team alone.
heh
That was uncalled for.
Maple they can come to an understanding.
oh my
god
this is the best thing that’s happened to me today, reading this
Good thing she didn’t suggest the Habs, or she’d have been out of the window before she finished the sentence…
Billie should really know better than to make jokes about hockey to a canadian.
Yeah, the Leafs have that down to a T.
Ruth’s expressions here are some of my favourite.
Or Ruth could borrow Billie’s Femurs jersey.
But Billie needs her Femurs to live!
Panel 4: Ruth’s face when she finally makes this connection.
She’s just asking for a paddlin’.
Still teasing Josh?
David Willis finished Avalon
In his heart
We won’t get to see it
And that’s the story of how Ruth went to jail!…She was later aquitted when evidence ruled the murder justified.
Somehow this is cute. I am sure this conversation should not be as cute as it is to me.
At a guess, she learned about a sport just to tease Ruth. Definitely cute.
What are you going to do, Screw her to death?
The weird part is that that’s a thing.
Approximately eighty people experience “death by sex” annually in the United States.
I AM SUCH A NERD.
Beats off dying alone.
Even the Grim Reaper needs his bone polished every now and then…
Leave the world in the same way you entered it: naked and screaming.
Everyone makes this joke (or variations thereon); no one thinks how traumatic it’d be for the partner. :p
Easy solution: die together!
If there’s one thing the internet teaches us, it’s that everything is somebody’s fetish.
It’s definitely a good thing Mary wasn’t around during that incident, or Ruth would definitely be in trouble. She’s a sharp one, that Mary.
In Canada this would be justifiable homicide. Not just for the Leafs.
Someone took a grapefruit and wore it like a hat
A couple a’my buddies were under the kitchen table
Talkin’ to my ol’ tomcat
They were talkin’ ’bout hockey
The cat was talkin’ back
Round about then everything went black–but
Wasn’t That A Party?!
Coulda been the whiskey; mighta been the gin
Coulda been the three, four six packs, I dunno, but look at the shape I’m in
Lord, that takes me back.
See, this is why I voted for “Ruth and Billie again”. How can this NOT be the beginning of the next Slipshine?!
Everyone wants to see Jason’s huge cock.
Appropriate gravatar is appropriate.
+1
I just threw up in my mouth.
A TA’s staff has a knob on the end…
It’s not nearly as suggestive when you leave the poem unfinished.
It was too long.
Hate-fuck FTW!
I think I can actually hear her fury.
“Or maybe some Montreal Canadiens gear?…”
Not to a Leafs fan, them’s fighting words. When I was living up there (back when those were the only two Canadian teams) people were literally killed for that.
If any of you haven’t seen this, check out this NFB short film, “The Sweater“. Fantastic, and a Canadian classic. We all grew up on it.
Not all of us …. Some of us had other priorities or just could not enjoy watching a game that got ‘mericanized.
Understandable.
“The Sweater” was one of the ones they played at us in school. Actually, the NFB films are pretty rad.
Did they… … …
…Did they apologize afterward
Looks like its Stabby time!
Billie..u dun fucked up!!!
I think that was her intention.
Who cares about pro hockey in Bloomington, Indiana?
Angry Ruthless people.
Ruth, and people who want to have angry sex with Ruth.
And the people that actually play the game.
And Billie.
Because, Billie isn’t Ruthless.
Cause she, you know, has a Ruth.
Overexplaining is fun.
“Who cares about pro hockey in Bloomington, Indiana?”
Look up “Indianapolis Racers” on Wikipedia. In particular, look at who they signed.
(Besides, there are plenty of out-of-state, and out-of-country, students.)
Who cares about Hockey anywhere…*Sees Mobs of Hockey fans* Oh, Shit!
Hrm, I’m a bit worried something else is going on here; Ruth looks pretty disturbed in 4 and 6, and I’d think Billie’s comments would just make her angry.
I’m just assuming it’s a joke about how seriously some people take their sports, with the disturbed look there. Unless shown otherwise later, I guess.
I read it as a combination of shock and surprised. Ruth is shocked Billie would promote the Sens to her like this, and surprised she knows enough about hockey to know it’d get under her skin. And THEN she gets mad.
I agree with commenters above: it looks like Billie’s learned a bit about hockey specifically to tease Ruth.
Two things to understand:
1) Billie is deliberately provoking Ruth to anger, ’cause she finds that frickin’ hot. For these two, rage is the fastest route to sexytimes.
2) Billie has found Ruth gets very emotional about her Leafs. As Billie is a Sens fan, this is an easy subject to provoke her with.
Stupid question: Why exactly would Ruth get fired if they were found out? I mean, she’s a student too, right? Just because she’s an RA, does that mean she can’t have a relationship with another student?
I imagine it would be due to the fact that Billie is under her care. If she were not her R.A. it would probably be fine.
Power imbalance. It’s a rule at pretty much every college.
It does in fact mean that she can’t have a relationship with a student on her floor, because she’s in a position of authority over them. If Billie moved to a different dorm they could bang all they want and no one could say anything about it.
At least not legitimately. It probably wouldn’t stop Mary from mouthing off, but she wouldn’t be able to get Ruth in trouble with the administration over it.
Which makes me wonder why Billie doesn’t just request a transfer. Surely that would be easy enough in a dorm?
She’s 18, alcoholic and in love. That’s the stupidity trifecta.
Pretty much the same reason why teacher’s aren’t allowed to bang students. Good thing no the teachers in this universe aren’t fucking stude- oh wait.
>No teachers aren’t fucking students
The next Slipshine will be Professor Rees receiving fellatio from Danny.
NUMBER MUNCHER: A Dumbing of Age Pornographique
*patiently waits for opportunity for wrestling jokes*
You might be grappling with a long wait, then.
(“Murder was in fact a fairly uncommon event in Ankh-Morpork, but there were a lot of suicides. Walking in the night-time alleyways of The Shades was suicide. Asking for a short in a dwarf bar was suicide. Saying ‘Got rocks in your head?’ to a troll was suicide. You could commit suicide very easily, if you weren’t careful.”)
WHERE IS THE FREAKIN’ “LIKE” BUTTON???
I’m so happy for this quote.
Discworld references for the win! That’s Music With Rocks In right there.
Heh.
Ah, if Ruth ever gave a “You’re dead to me” look, it would be panels 4 & 6.
I’m pretty sure those are anger-lust.
Those are “I’ll strangle you!” looks.
Which are closely followed by “Her skin is so soft..” thoughts as she is strangling her.
“Auto ass fix” you say?
Auto ass fix she hate.
Yeah, I’d hate to make repairs to Carla’s butt, too.
It’s funny because the word “tailpipe” works on both the literal and figurative levels here
Supposedly there is a term for when someone provokes a fight with law enforcement that winds up with deadly force being employed known as “suicide by cop”. I guess “assisted suicide by RA” isn’t entirely out of the question.
I love how hockey is a thing in this comic. Seriously. It’s awesome
I hate hockey so this is meaningless to me. I don’t like any sport where you can go the whole game and end up at 0-0.
amen brother
But 0-0 would either mean that both teams really sucked, or that both teams were really awesome. If the latter, you’d still end up with a really entertaining game despite no one actually scoring.
But you are forgetting that for a lot of “Fans” that it is not about how the game is played but by how big the scores are or the points spread …… Explains why Basketball is more popular than Football aka Soccer.
Wasn’t it about the fistfights
I thought it was all about the fistfights
“I went to a fight the other night, and a hockey game broke out.”
I’m not really a sports guy in general outside of Pro Wrestling but yeah that’s why I can’t get into Hockey or Soccer.
Pro wrestling is not a sport, they even admitted it when they changed the name to Worldwide Wrestling Entertainment.
Sure you are not thinking about soccer? Very few hockey games end scoreless. Getting a shutout is a pretty big accomplishment for a goalie.
Awww, it’s their first fi
uh, their, fifth fi
uh, their seven hundred and ninety-second fight!
Wait, I’m JOEL?
…Acceptable.
*Joe, damn one of my uncles for having a name similar to a webcomic character
He’s also a psychic, gay, anthropomorphic prick.
Ballerina Mafia, I think.
Ha, I thought you’d slipped up and were referring to Watson.
Didn’t expect the breakup to happen so quickly
You misspelled “furious hatesex” there.
They’re still supposed to be in Billie’s room, not Ruthless’
Where will you be when FHS happens?
Epic Hate Fucking, it’s Epic Hate Fucking
Hrm… well my knowledge of hockey stuff pretty much begins and ends with the Mighty Ducks movies ~_~
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZZyDsF-Gp3o
This will explain the conversation here, at least.
Ruth’s face is priceless
As a Leafs fan, gotta say, I’ve been loving the recent strips, and am amused that your Indiana folks are as up to date with their Leafs jokes as your average Canadian.
Since I’ve been lured into commenting, gotta say two things. First, cheer on a winning team? If you wanted a winning team, you wouldn’t cheer for the Leafs in the first place. Also, if you want a winning team, then you aren’t really a fan either. It’s the mindless love in the face of constant defeat that makes a true fan.
Secondly, the Sens?! THE SENS?!
Take her femurs and beat her mostly to death because death is too good for her, Ruthless!
Eh, see but the Sens can actually beat the worst team in the NHL. Though the Leafs have only split the series, which is a little disappointing because the Sabres can usually count on winning that and seeing the Leaf fans’ angry disappointed faces as they leave First Niagara Center gives me life.
Mostly because that’s pretty much the only time in recent years where I can leave without feeling horribly depressed but YOU KNOW.
(Also I went through and counted and y’all aren’t doing as bad as Montreal vs the Sabres, so you have that over them).
As someone who doesn’t even watch sports (other than esports), I can completely get behind this line of thought.
You’re a fan because you wanna cheer, if you wanted to root for the winners, just wait until the outcome and be like “Yeah! My team won!”.
and then they kiss
I voted for the 3 dudes option, not least to see what people in the strip would be up for it.
Joe? He doesn’t sound too keen on man on man, but who else would be with Danny and Ethan?
It might not even be any of them at all!
But if we’re gonna go with current cast members…
Joe MIGHT. He seems extremely uncomfortable with his sexual orientation. He’s always having to assert it, almost like he’s making sure everyone knows he fucks chicks. But I dunno, I might be reading into it a lot more than necessary. Him and Danny though? I don’t think either of them would be down. It might feel like incest for them.
I’d go with Jacob. Of the characters we know right now, I’ll go with Danny, Ethan, and Jacob.
I’m pretty sure Joe is Straight with a capital S. He isn’t uncomfortable with his sexual orientation, he’s just -enjoying- it.
He makes sure everyone knows because he’s broadcasting his availability.
I have a feeling if Joe got hit on by guys – good looking ones – he’d be flaunting it. ‘The J-Man’s that good that he got dudes like THAT to want a piece of him.’
For reasonably main characters, I think the only option is Ethan, Danny, and Mike.
I have no prurient interest in dudes banging, but I want that to happen just because it would be awesome and hilarious and wrong.
Mike has already expressed no qualms about hypothetically getting Danny’s sloppy seconds. Presumably he also would have no qualms about getting Dan-juice on himself directly from the source, unless it would involve Danny enjoying the process.
The 3 Dudes option does not mean he has a plan for a 3 dudes slipshine, it’s just gauging where people’s mindsets are at in terms of subsequent pornings.
I think the honeymoon period has just officially ended.
A lot of people are thinking this is break up city. Would they really break up over a sports team? Is that a thing that ACTUALLY happens?
It happens much more often than people would hope.
I can confirm, I’ve broken up for less.
(namely I didn’t like the name she gave my schlong)
When she starts calling it “Millimeter Peter” it is probably not a compliment, no
Millipete?
Dammit, all the easy puns have been taken and I don’t know enough about hockey to say something clever.
Loved the DiskWorld quote. Excellent.
Poke her again Billy, she’s heating up.
Time for a tasteful fade out here, as the girls get down to business.
To bad the two of them turn each other on by pushing each other’s pissed buttons.
“too bad”?
I do not think that phrase means what you think it means, my dear.
It’d be a shame if their turned on-ness has a parallel exponential growth with their hornyness. They’d end up killing each other as the ultimate sex play.
Angry Lesbian Hate-Sex is imminent.
And also the perfect name for a band.
Anything is a name for a band if you’re willing to stretch it.
The kind of band is the issue.
I’m waiting for the Rubber Band, comprised of people who play music while wearing rubber suits.
“Rubber Band” could totally be a mascot band for a condom company.
Bangin’… on the drums
Blowin’… into the trumpet
Fingerin’… the cello
Wailin’… into the microphone
They’re safe even when they’re edgy, and they can always get a good rib in. They’re the Rubber Band!
Angry Bisexual Hate-Sex is imminent.
Unless they bring in a guy, I’m pretty sure it’s still valid to call their sex acts “lesbian”.
Neither of them is a lesbian. So no. They don’t stop being bisexual just because there’s no penis involved at the moment.
Ah, the Maple-loafs. Making everybody else feel better since forever.
(says a lifelong Cubs fan)
Someone’s feeling sassy right now XD
As a Leafs fan myself, even I will admit that was a great burn.
Clever Billie who knows what buttons to push to turn sensible girlfriend anger into hot hockey-rage sex
hot hockey-rage sex sounds much better than lesbian sexy suicide pact
Y’know Bille, you could just ASK for a hatefuck.
I think that’s what she’s doing.
Oh, Billie. Ruth does care about you, but you’re talking heresy. I’m not sure even your wiles can get you out of being scourged & purged.
…oh hell, now I’m gonna interpret Astarte’s warcries lewdly.
Adeptus Astartes is not possessive. I thought I’d disabled autocorrect…
As someone from Toronto… this is legit how people will react. I honestly don’t care for hockey all that much. It doesn’t really matter to me who wins, so long as it’d be a Canadian team. However, to quote my hardcore Leafs fan of an older sister and the conversation we had…
Me: “The Leafs are never in the playoffs. Why not just cheer for Montreal/Ottawa/any other Canadian team?”
Sister (with wide eyes of death): “No. They’re our rivals. They have to lose. Don’t ever say something so stupid again.”
Technically EVERY team is a rival!
A rivalry is more personal than just a competitor. All criminals aren’t Sherlock Holmes’ rival, but Moriarty sure is.
I would find Billie’s cattiness much more adorable if I didn’t think it was caused partly by the two bottles of booze from yesterday.
You are right, Ruth, that discretion would be a smart move – but it’s awfully late in the game for you to demand discretion, miss pigtails-in-inkwells.
I love how they’re both wearing Leafs shirts. There’s a nice cosplay idea.
i believe we touched on this the other day. Billie is wearing the Leafs shirt; Ruthless has a ringer T-shirt that appears to be in Toronto colors, but it is not a Leafs shirt specifically.
As a hockey fan, I know her anger
Fitting Avatar.
You deserve to be fired, Ruth. You’re a power mad, abusive asshole.
She’d make a good politician eh.
It’s sad that I know how Ruth feels, but in an American football sense. I’m a huge Cincinnati Bengals fan and people can’t help but give me crap when they find out.
Could be worse…I’m a Bills fan.
Touche’
And this is why you never ask someone to betray their favorite team.
Hey being a leaf’s fan is no different than being a Dallas Cowboys fan… Most years the team is not the greatest but when they get on a roll,
When’s the last time the Leafs were on a roll? I’m curious.
1967
Fourth generation Packer fan. Yes, your team matters. Bears are rivals, Lions and Vikings are just teams you like to beat. But I’ll watch the Bears just to see them suck. There are even several songs, a chant and an abbreviation (tbss) that are quite common. Plus, Bears fans are FIBs.
Billie may be pushing Ruth too far here. Or they may end up walking out after switching jerseys during hot sex and not notice it. Though Mary will.
Long-time Packer fan myself here too. You could actually draw a diagonal line from roughly Green Bay to Dubuque IA, and as a general rule the “hated team” depends on which side of this line you find yourself. Fans who find themselves to the south and east of this line generally all hate “da Bears”, and anyone north and west of the line feel that even if the Pack goes 2-14, as long as those two wins were against the Minnesota Viqueens it was a good season.
No, telling her to switch to the Montreal Canadiens would have been pushing Ruth to far. Always been a huge rivalry between Montreal and Toronto in hockey.
Kicking the Leafs while they’re down, eh?
I’m a Habs fan, so maybe this is a weird thing to say, but I feel kind of bad for the Leafs, and especially bad for Leafs fans.
Billie’s poking the bear. And for the record, Mr. Willis – “angry Canadian”… Is that a thing? Of course, I’m from the Maritimes, so what do I know?
Yes its any Canadian when they talk to someone from Toronto about … well anything actually.
Talk to Rob Ford about bicycle infrastructure, or better yet Google it…
Are all Indiana teens so well versed in hockey?? Growing up kids only knew about footballs and hardly cared about hockey.
I think the implication is Billie cared enough about her relationship to look up some hockey facts. That, or osmosis.
Definitly osmosis.
It wasn’t just Billie. It was the girls on the floor too. Does Indiana just follow the NHL since they don’t have a football team?
LGRW
I am so happy that the only sports discussion thus far is all about the only sport I actually care for. <3
Of course, both of these girls need to get some Red Wings apparel.
And Mike can wear a Thrashers jersey just to piss me off.
“Thrashers” is appropriate for mike. But lets be honest hes a bruins fan.
-Maniacal laughter from the Canadiens fans in the distance-
THE SPORTS HAVE BEEN OFFENDED!
oof, it took me a moment to figure out that the perspective completely flips between the first and second panels. the slow turn confused me because it looked like she was turning to look outside of the room.
Ruth looks ready to beat Billie up. Again.
Oh… Of course Billie knows how to trash-talk rival sports teams. She used to be a cheerleader, which means it was basically her job!
I’m torn between wanting these two to work things out together and building a 300 mile wall between them that can only be passed by undergoing sobriety tests and years of therapy.
Their relationship is not one of their problems, but their problems are not helped by their relationship. MAYBE their relationship might be the path to a solution to some of their problems. Maybe.
OK I have lived in places where these were the NHL “home teams”: Leafs, Bruins, Kings, Mighty Ducks, Ducks, Stars, Predators, Flames (they used to be in Atlanta), and not in the NHL, the Golden Eagles. I still have a Golden Eagles souvenir puck someplace. We moved around a lot when I was a kid.
*insert joke that someone who knows anything about hockey, or any other sport for that matter, would make*
Ruth’s gonna need some ointment for that burn (in Billie’s defense, the Maple Leaf’s do suck….the only team worse would probably be Edmonton Oilers….like my sister cheers for….they are constantly the last team or second last team in the Western Conference)
Assisted small death.
Hon hon hon
You never know when the black humour is going to creep in with these two. Assisted suicide…just wow
BUT LOOK AT HER FAAAAAAACE