Dumbing of Age Book Twelve

Dumbing of Age

A college webcomic by David Willis
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BUFFER WATCH Comics are currently drawn and uploaded through:

May 5, 2026

Possible

by David M Willis on December 19, 2015 at 12:01 am
  • 02 - That Perfect Girl
└ Tags: danny, ethan

Discussion (197) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. Ana Chronistic
    Ana Chronistic
    December 19, 2015 at 12:01 am | #

    “Oh my God!”

    “Pardon?”

    “Oh no, Mr. Siegal. Oh no.”

    “What’s wrong?”

    “Mr. Siegal, you didn’t… I mean, you didn’t expect…”

    “What?”

    “I mean, you didn’t really think I’d do something like that.”

    “Like what?”

    “What do you think?”

    “Well, I don’t know.”

    “For God’s sake, Mr. Siegal. Here we are. You got me into your dorm room. You show me a slashfic. You… put on Transformers. Now you start opening up your gay sex maneuvers to me and tell me your roommate won’t be home for hours.”

    “So?”

    “Mr. Siegal, you’re trying to seduce me.”

    “Huh?”

    “…aren’t you??” =(

    “Uh, actually I was just getting to a theory that they’re hung like barnacles, so maybe that would reach after all, BUT IF HE COOPERATES”

    “Is… that a yes? I CAN’T TELL ANYMORE”

    • EdHead
      EdHead
      December 19, 2015 at 12:02 am | #

      When you want to get the reference, but never watched the movie….’
      heard of it in the intwerwebz

    • Maveric1984
      Maveric1984
      December 19, 2015 at 12:11 am | #

      I understood that reference

      • Skilltagz
        Skilltagz
        December 19, 2015 at 12:19 am | #

        Damn it but was that reference???!!!

        • Ana Chronistic
          Ana Chronistic
          December 19, 2015 at 12:21 am | #

          PLASTICS

        • vonniesaur
          vonniesaur
          December 19, 2015 at 11:15 am | #

          I thought it was just a general yaoi reference

          • JustCheetoDust
            JustCheetoDust
            December 19, 2015 at 2:25 pm | #

            Wait, people generally ship Dustin Hoffman with his male co-stars?

    • batman
      batman
      December 19, 2015 at 12:19 am | #

      Great movie

    • Captain Button
      Captain Button
      December 19, 2015 at 12:23 am | #

      For the clueless amoungst us

      • Minty
        Minty
        December 19, 2015 at 1:13 am | #

        thanks for posting that! i was so clueless, haha

    • fogel
      fogel
      December 19, 2015 at 4:42 am | #

      “We’d like to know a little bit about you for our files. We’d like to help you learn about yourself.” Can that please go on the hacked Muzak?

    • DarkVeghetta
      DarkVeghetta
      December 19, 2015 at 6:49 am | #

      *slow clap*

    • NelC
      NelC
      December 19, 2015 at 4:18 pm | #

      Last frame:

      http://marieclaire.media.ipcdigital.co.uk/11116/000083c4f/f201_orh1000w646/The-Graduate.jpg

      • Historyman68
        Historyman68
        December 19, 2015 at 8:28 pm | #

        Whoa.

  2. AnvilPro
    AnvilPro
    December 19, 2015 at 12:01 am | #

    Bow chicka bow wow

    • Dana
      Dana
      December 19, 2015 at 12:29 am | #

      Coo coo cachoo

      • Who Izzy
        Who Izzy
        December 19, 2015 at 12:36 am | #

        I’m the key master are you the gate keeper?

        • ed rhodes
          ed rhodes
          December 19, 2015 at 10:53 am | #

          um, wouldn’t they BOTH be “keymasters?”

          • Noclevername
            Noclevername
            December 19, 2015 at 4:40 pm | #

            Don’t forget the back gate.

      • lejwocky
        lejwocky
        December 19, 2015 at 12:48 am | #

        Mann gegen Mann

        • inqntrol
          inqntrol
          December 19, 2015 at 1:37 am | #

          Did you mean this?

        • Usayasha
          Usayasha
          December 19, 2015 at 1:41 am | #

          Cthulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn

          • JustCheetoDust
            JustCheetoDust
            December 19, 2015 at 9:11 am | #

            Pubes.

    • AeroQC
      AeroQC
      December 20, 2015 at 12:07 am | #

      Channel your inner Tucker

  3. Chengrel
    Chengrel
    December 19, 2015 at 12:02 am | #

    Just do it already!

    • Cerberus
      Cerberus
      December 19, 2015 at 12:07 am | #

      Sadly for shippers, Danny’s loyalty, monogamy, and tendency to flee from attractions that are not to his current partners means that Ethan/Danny is going to be just in subtext for a very long time… unless Amber randomly Dans it up at some point, but even then I can see Danny refusing to date Ethan for awhile after that out of that weird social rule that’s more enforced when you’re younger where you don’t date friends of former romantic partners and vice versa.

      • Emma
        Emma
        December 19, 2015 at 12:15 am | #

        I think Amber has already Danned it up, and a break up is coming…but that doesn’t mean that Danny is into hot rebound sex, and I don’t think Ethan would feel comfortable fucking his best friend’s ex. I feel like he’d be the type to ask permission.

        • Gangler
          Gangler
          December 19, 2015 at 1:24 am | #

          I don’t think Dan would even consider it rebound sex at this point in the process. A breakup may or may not be coming but they’re not broken up yet. Dan would probably consider it infidelity if he were to have sex with somebody else right now.

          Honesly, I’m not sure that’s a bad way to view things? Like, this isn’t the first time he and Amber have had a rough patch. There was that time Amber wouldn’t speak with him for a few days and he was unsure of where he stood with her. Not like it’s a foregone conclusion that the relationship’s over.

          Plus it’s still been what, like ten minutes since they had their spat? I’m pretty sure that’s not how a committed monogamous relationship is supposed to work. The appropriate response to this sort of fight isn’t to walk off and immediately start sexing up other people. Like what, every time there’s an incident is it gonna be a race against the clock to patch things up before Danny finishes walking to the neighbor’s place? Just doesn’t sound functional.

          • Emma
            Emma
            December 19, 2015 at 12:27 pm | #

            But that wasn’t just an argument. She called him a ‘stupid piece of–” and I think we can finish that sentence pretty well. If a partner called me a stupid piece of shit I’d ollie out of there because I don’t deserve to be treated that way and neither does Danny.

            Amber ran off, so obviously he couldn’t patch things up. I think it’ll be awhile yet before they have the conversation, simply because of how this comic operates.

            I’m also a bit biased. I don’t like how Amber treats Danny and I’ve wanted them to break up for a long time.

            • Spencer
              Spencer
              December 19, 2015 at 12:36 pm | #

              Amber said that and then immediately freaked out and started beating herself up.

              People say shitty things sometimes. If I ended every single relationship I’ve ever had because one of us angrily lashed out, I’d never be able to know anybody.

              • Emma
                Emma
                December 19, 2015 at 12:49 pm | #

                I suppose you’re right, and Danny honestly didn’t seem to mind that much. I suppose most people are more forgiving than I am. 😛 After coming out of a relationship from hell, I guess it’s once bitten twice shy for me.

                I do think they need to talk about it though. I don’t think Danny would be the one to break it off in all honesty. IF a break up were to occur, I think it would be from Amber’s end.

                • Emma
                  Emma
                  December 19, 2015 at 12:50 pm | #

                  What the hell that was NOT what I expected from the face I typed out.

                • Spencer
                  Spencer
                  December 19, 2015 at 12:58 pm | #

                  No yeah, it’s a Big Deal because Amber was verbally abusing him, and nobody deserves that regardless of the circumstances. Like, I’ve said horrible shit to people I love, and they’ve done the same to me. Because we’re people and sometimes we say and do things beneath ourselves, and I try to fix things with them because they’re worth it. I wouldn’t really apply that to toxic, abusive relationships, though.

                  But like, that’s just me. I can’t seriously tell people that they must accept a certain level of abuse before they call it quits. Personally, I really, really don’t think Amber is even close to that. She fell back on learned behaviours from Blaine when she lost control of the situation, and then immediately apologized, blaming her inherent failures as a person for lashing out. If she kept doing it without any kind of attempt at changing, or worse even tried to justify it as “not that bad”, then yeah, it would be time to let go, but that’s not Amber. She’s not trying to justify it or anything; she immediately recognized her abusive behaviour as abusive.

                  And for what it’s worth, I’m sorry that you had to go through that.

        • random832
          random832
          December 19, 2015 at 5:05 pm | #

          > his best friend’s ex

          Also his ex’s other ex.

          • Spencer
            Spencer
            December 19, 2015 at 5:30 pm | #

            If were bringing the multiverse into this, then there’s also his girlfriend’s ex’s ex who is Danny’s crossdimensional stalker, and Danny’s ex’s boyfriend’s sister who Danny dated in another timeline.

        • Herp
          Herp
          December 19, 2015 at 10:31 pm | #

          CALLING IT NOW
          AMBER-DAN-ETHAN THREEWAY

          • NakedDumblydore
            NakedDumblydore
            December 19, 2015 at 11:49 pm | #

            I’m gonna need a more powerful B.O.B. if that ship ever sails. Especially if it ever sails into Slipshine.

      • Dave
        Dave
        December 19, 2015 at 12:43 am | #

        A Danny sandwich (or Danwich) is still an option!

        • John
          John
          December 19, 2015 at 2:24 am | #

          The only sandwich with the Wonderbread in the middle!

          • Noclevername
            Noclevername
            December 19, 2015 at 9:01 am | #

            John, I hereby award you an Internet.

            • Opus the Poet
              Opus the Poet
              December 19, 2015 at 1:40 pm | #

              +1! Would read again.

          • Henrique
            Henrique
            December 19, 2015 at 5:00 pm | #

            Damn, that was gold!

          • Skilltagz
            Skilltagz
            December 19, 2015 at 8:45 pm | #

            Nope Chuck Tes- I mean toast sandwich https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Toast_sandwich

      • Adam Black
        Adam Black
        December 19, 2015 at 1:52 am | #

        Sexuality has a way of breaking people of out their expected consistency.
        if this was true to life theyd probably rip off their clothes soon, and feel bad after
        . Maybe we can have some playful wrestlung that goes to far first

        • Lord Stoneheart
          Lord Stoneheart
          December 19, 2015 at 8:13 am | #

          It can still be true to life without having a character, who has loyalty as one of his defining traits, cheat on his girlfriend.

          I mean I was under the impression that you could find someone attractive and get flustered by them without sex stuff happening.

    • Dara
      Dara
      December 19, 2015 at 1:51 am | #

      YES PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF THE GODS JUST FIND OUT ALREADY.

    • Needfuldoer
      Needfuldoer
      December 19, 2015 at 7:46 am | #

      Don’t let your dreams be dreams!

  4. Mr. Mendo
    Mr. Mendo
    December 19, 2015 at 12:02 am | #

    Danny’s, like, ten seconds from ripping his bodice open. 😉

    • Cholma
      Cholma
      December 19, 2015 at 12:08 am | #

      Mr Darcy won’t allow that! He owns the patent on causing bodice-ripping! 😀

      • Arian
        Arian
        December 19, 2015 at 1:59 am | #

        Dresses at the time P&P was set didn’t even have bodices. What would otherwise be the waistline started directly under the bust. You want to do any ripping, you need to pretty much tear the dress straight from the neckline….

        • fogel
          fogel
          December 19, 2015 at 4:46 am | #

          Empire waists we called them.

    • Yet_One_More_Idiot
      Yet_One_More_Idiot
      December 19, 2015 at 7:04 am | #

      Danny, that was a truly impressive Flash Step you managed just then.

      Go, find your girlfriend and have amazing make-up sex right now, before you go and Dan things up again by mistake!
      (or is Ethan about to go and Dan things up this time? …I’m not sure)

  5. modulusshift
    modulusshift
    December 19, 2015 at 12:02 am | #

    I want to see this in pictures. Can anyone figure out their description?

    • Ana Chronistic
      Ana Chronistic
      December 19, 2015 at 12:04 am | #

      sounds like a standing 69

      • Tan
        Tan
        December 19, 2015 at 12:15 am | #

        I thought about that, but the self-evidence of 69 (whether vertical, horizontal, orthogonal, whatever) on similar-height persons should be fairly inarguable. The difficulty of standing 69 is an issue of support strength. This is something else, or at least some more specific subset of standing 69 (say that 6 times fast).

      • JustCheetoDust
        JustCheetoDust
        December 19, 2015 at 12:57 am | #

        Or a Rusty Venture.

    • Captain Button
      Captain Button
      December 19, 2015 at 12:07 am | #

      Don’t be so sure the artist actually knows the answer: Head-Tiltingly Kinky

      • modulusshift
        modulusshift
        December 19, 2015 at 12:12 am | #

        It is, in fact, possible that even Amber wasn’t quite keeping up with what all exactly was going on. anatomical plausibility may come with age. 🙂

    • Swissaboo
      Swissaboo
      December 19, 2015 at 4:53 am | #

      I’m 90% sure this is the pitcher sucking the catcher’s dick.

      • Silly Name
        Silly Name
        December 19, 2015 at 5:57 am | #

        It is definitely some sort of reacharound move, but the pitcher sucking the catcher’s dick _is_ impossible.

        • Firefly
          Firefly
          December 19, 2015 at 4:30 pm | #

          Difficult, but not impossible if the top is flexible enough.

      • Emma
        Emma
        December 19, 2015 at 12:54 pm | #

        That…that can’t work? It could be a combination of dick sucking and rimming, but that seems super crazy far fetched. But I guess that’s the point!

  6. Cerberus
    Cerberus
    December 19, 2015 at 12:03 am | #

    I think Danny’s about to Dan things up to separate himself from the “temptation of Ethan”.

    • Historyman68
      Historyman68
      December 19, 2015 at 12:08 am | #

      Intentional Danning is an advanced Danny move.

      • Yet_One_More_Idiot
        Yet_One_More_Idiot
        December 19, 2015 at 7:05 am | #

        Flash Stepping away from Ethan was a pretty good start to intentionally Dannning things up with Ethan.

      • achallenger
        achallenger
        December 19, 2015 at 10:23 pm | #

        Professionals only

  7. JessWitt
    JessWitt
    December 19, 2015 at 12:03 am | #

    I don’t understand any of this and yet it’s turning me on.

  8. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    December 19, 2015 at 12:03 am | #

    I have seen enough fanart to know that it indeed can reach that far.

    • JustCheetoDust
      JustCheetoDust
      December 19, 2015 at 1:20 am | #

      One guy jerking off a large room full of dudes gets a 12 page study on its feasibility, I’m not sure this will get similar treatment.

      • inqntrol
        inqntrol
        December 19, 2015 at 1:49 am | #

        My God, it’s math again! I just can’t escape it! It’s….it’s…everywhere around us.

        • inqntrol
          inqntrol
          December 19, 2015 at 1:51 am | #

          And physics as well, but I math is the one I don’t get along with since highschool.

          • MrZombieScordo
            MrZombieScordo
            December 19, 2015 at 2:04 am | #

            physics is just applied math

            • TheGrammarLegionary
              TheGrammarLegionary
              December 19, 2015 at 3:49 am | #

              Yes, but physics is also to math what sex is to masturbation.

              (Richard Feynman)

              • Yet_One_More_Idiot
                Yet_One_More_Idiot
                December 19, 2015 at 7:08 am | #

                As someone who studied both physics and maths at uni (my degrees is in Mathematics, but I took a lot of advanced physics courses in there too), they’re both equally amazing subjects in their own ways. 🙂

                …trying to take two modules in quantum mechanics, however, was a bad move for me in hindsight. 😛

        • Gecko
          Gecko
          December 19, 2015 at 7:11 am | #

          Yes, try as you may, you just can’t get away from mathematics!

          • JustCheetoDust
            JustCheetoDust
            December 19, 2015 at 9:08 am | #

            Math truly is the Droopy [Mc]Poodle of knowledge.

      • DaveM
        DaveM
        December 19, 2015 at 5:31 am | #

        Well, that beats my favourite study
        Estimating the Airspeed Velocity of an Unladen Swallow

        Though mine is much safer for work (unless you have a swallow/python fetish, which frankly is your business).

      • de Combys
        de Combys
        December 19, 2015 at 7:17 pm | #

        OH NO WTH HAHAHA I’m crying

      • Tenn
        Tenn
        December 19, 2015 at 7:28 pm | #

        What the actual fuck.

        It’s like Rule 34 in reverse.

        They can be connected in series or parallel.

        Series. Or parallel.

  9. Makkabee
    Makkabee
    December 19, 2015 at 12:03 am | #

    What time is it, kids?

    It’s GAY PANIC TIME!!!

    (cue corny theme song and creepy marionettes)

    • Usayasha
      Usayasha
      December 19, 2015 at 1:47 am | #

      Is it gay panic if you’re bisexual? Or should we call it BI FRENZY!!!

      Speaking of, there should also be DEMI DREAD, HETERO HYSTERIA, ACE ALARM, and PAN TERROR!!!

      • Solenoid
        Solenoid
        December 19, 2015 at 3:30 am | #

        Why not pandemonium?

        • Usayasha
          Usayasha
          December 19, 2015 at 4:53 pm | #

          I concede that you idea is much better than mine.

          • achallenger
            achallenger
            December 19, 2015 at 10:24 pm | #

            So many demons

  10. Jabberwocky
    Jabberwocky
    December 19, 2015 at 12:03 am | #

    C’mon, Ethan, don’t sell yourself short!

  11. Lennard
    Lennard
    December 19, 2015 at 12:03 am | #

    It’s a bit of a stretch isn’t it?

  12. modulusshift
    modulusshift
    December 19, 2015 at 12:05 am | #

    Major props to Ethan for standing around with effectively a ThinkPad while reading text. Anyone use tablets?

    • Ana Chronistic
      Ana Chronistic
      December 19, 2015 at 12:20 am | #

      maybe that’s what Amber wrote it on, she won’t let anyone take it off the drive

    • Needfuldoer
      Needfuldoer
      December 19, 2015 at 7:52 am | #

      However did we survive before magical Internet rectangles were invented?

      It’s not even that big for a laptop, maybe large-netbook size.

  13. Captain Button
    Captain Button
    December 19, 2015 at 12:05 am | #

    Learn from the mistakes of others, Danny.

    Lock
    the
    door.

    • John
      John
      December 19, 2015 at 12:08 am | #

      At least close the door, jeez. How are you supposed to charge a subscription fee to watch your bangings if you’re just doin’ it with the door wide open?

      • inqntrol
        inqntrol
        December 19, 2015 at 1:31 am | #

        A sock on the door handle solves that problem.

  14. John
    John
    December 19, 2015 at 12:05 am | #

    Are they still talking about Transformers? Because I don’t think whatever position they’re analyzing is the most unlikely way Transformers can move/bend/scale themselves.

    • Captain Button
      Captain Button
      December 19, 2015 at 12:20 am | #

      This is the Avengers in college. That is what is on the tablet. The Transformers one was just mentioned.

      • Ana Chronistic
        Ana Chronistic
        December 19, 2015 at 12:23 am | #

        the Avengers AU segues into Transformers in a sexy crossover

      • modulusshift
        modulusshift
        December 19, 2015 at 12:25 am | #

        That’s a laptop. Businessy, like a ThinkPad. It’s half folded in the last panel.

      • modulusshift
        modulusshift
        December 19, 2015 at 12:26 am | #

        Also I interpreted panel 3 of the last comic to mean that he was switching to the Transformers fic, which Danny then asked about.

  15. Catullus
    Catullus
    December 19, 2015 at 12:05 am | #

    Based on that last panel, they’ve apparently been having this whole discussion in front of an open door.

    • Dean
      Dean
      December 19, 2015 at 3:14 am | #

      In tomorrow’s strip, Dina wanders in and explains how it works, with diagrams.

      • Genesee
        Genesee
        December 19, 2015 at 7:39 am | #

        Sorry, I think Mike is about to wander in. It is how this cruel universe works. It is just the way this cruel universe short-sheets you. You walk away from an inter action like this, and bam! You’re hard as a 20 penny nail.

        • Emma
          Emma
          December 19, 2015 at 12:57 pm | #

          Mike walks in, explains how it works, and says he knows from experience, leaving both of them flustered.

          • de Combys
            de Combys
            December 19, 2015 at 7:15 pm | #

            Ohhh :O

  16. Stephen R. Bierce
    Stephen R. Bierce
    December 19, 2015 at 12:05 am | #

    I swore I would never play “Little Willy” on the hacked Muzak.

    DAMN YOU WILLIS.

    • inqntrol
      inqntrol
      December 19, 2015 at 2:52 am | #

      It’s not a bad…or is it for another reasons you won’t play it(heh heh)

  17. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    December 19, 2015 at 12:06 am | #

    …and then Jacob walks in…

    • inqntrol
      inqntrol
      December 19, 2015 at 1:28 am | #

      “Oh hey folks, my glasses broke and I came to get my spare. Cya.”
      “….Is he..?
      “No, but according to Amber’s other fanfic..”

  18. Kraken
    Kraken
    December 19, 2015 at 12:06 am | #

    He’s gonna need to get closer if they’re hoping to pass their Mechanics of Gay Sex final.

  19. Historyman68
    Historyman68
    December 19, 2015 at 12:06 am | #

    Never was the title of the individual strip so relevant.

  20. DarkoNeko
    DarkoNeko
    December 19, 2015 at 12:07 am | #

    Stop protecting your butt, DAnny.

  21. meanderling
    meanderling
    December 19, 2015 at 12:07 am | #

    Two of her boyfriends acting out her slash fic: is this Amber’s wet dream or worst nightmare? (The answer is probably both. Let’s see if her yaoi fangirl can trump worries about being left out.)

    • modulusshift
      modulusshift
      December 19, 2015 at 12:09 am | #

      I feel like Amazi-Girl is gonna be pissed, but Amber might be all “Kiss him, not me!”

    • DarkoNeko
      DarkoNeko
      December 19, 2015 at 12:18 am | #

      in theory it’s a big, big wet dream. In pratice that’d be a nightmare.

  22. DinaWho
    DinaWho
    December 19, 2015 at 12:07 am | #

    is that a boner i see in panel four

    • Emma
      Emma
      December 19, 2015 at 12:11 am | #

      Why yes, yes it is.

    • lejwocky
      lejwocky
      December 19, 2015 at 12:19 am | #

      Good eye

    • AgentKeen
      AgentKeen
      December 19, 2015 at 12:23 am | #

      Oh good, I’m not the only one that thought that.

    • JessWitt
      JessWitt
      December 19, 2015 at 3:32 am | #

      Good god, I thought it was just implied.

    • Silly Name
      Silly Name
      December 19, 2015 at 6:00 am | #

      The penis knows.

    • chiscii
      chiscii
      December 19, 2015 at 1:37 pm | #

      ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

  23. Edupoet81
    Edupoet81
    December 19, 2015 at 12:10 am | #

    Awww, and things were just starting to really heat up. Apparently, it was getting too hot for Danny to handle.

    The guy’s so distracted by the visions of man on man action dancing in his head, he seems to have forgotten that he (presumably) originally stopped by for advice on handling Amber’s emotional issues.

  24. Emma
    Emma
    December 19, 2015 at 12:12 am | #

    I love this strip so much. Laughed at the end, it was too perfect. I love how Ethan is more concerned about explaining the position than the fact that the example included himself and Danny.

    • de Combys
      de Combys
      December 19, 2015 at 7:13 pm | #

      I know, right?

      • achallenger
        achallenger
        December 19, 2015 at 10:27 pm | #

        Haven’t laughed outloud at a strip that hard in a while.

  25. batman
    batman
    December 19, 2015 at 12:18 am | #

    Steamy

    • modulusshift
      modulusshift
      December 19, 2015 at 12:27 am | #

      Quick on the uptake on that avatar.

      • No Name
        No Name
        December 19, 2015 at 1:45 am | #

        Time-bendingly quick, since this one (taken from today’s last panel) was up yesterday. Still not as quick as Ana Chronistic though.

        • Ana Chronistic
          Ana Chronistic
          December 19, 2015 at 1:51 am | #

          I could do faster, but I like the occasional realization of “OH I SEE WHAT YOU DID THERE” to shorten the intervals

      • batman
        batman
        December 21, 2015 at 12:41 pm | #

        Patreon

  26. caesaria82
    caesaria82
    December 19, 2015 at 12:28 am | #

    This is so cute and funny and maaaan, I just ship these two SO HARD. I’m so happy this is the last strip I’ll see before I leave into internet-less-ness for three weeks and not a downer strip xD

    • de Combys
      de Combys
      December 19, 2015 at 7:12 pm | #

      So hard!!!

  27. neeks
    neeks
    December 19, 2015 at 12:29 am | #

    This whole scene is like a fic prompt, tbh. “Character A and Character B are reading fanfiction, and in the process of arguing about the sexual mechanics of said fic they end up accidentally having sex.”

    Except that last bit probably won’t happen here between these two for various reasons like Danny’s monogamous trends and still coming to grips with his sexuality etc.

    • Sam
      Sam
      December 19, 2015 at 1:46 am | #

      That’s a really good fic prompt actually, I might use that.

      • modulusshift
        modulusshift
        December 19, 2015 at 11:56 pm | #

        Report back if you do!

  28. Rukduk
    Rukduk
    December 19, 2015 at 12:32 am | #

    There are now only three ways this can end. Two involve Danny danning things up, and one turns these past few strips into a very welcome comic relief segment. From what little I have learned of Willis’s style of writing, the first two seem more likely as there will be pain and the crushing of souls involved.

  29. DarkoNeko
    DarkoNeko
    December 19, 2015 at 12:38 am | #

    Are you going to ask Ethan about Amber anytime soon, tho ?

    • JustCheetoDust
      JustCheetoDust
      December 19, 2015 at 9:09 am | #

      Maybe post-coitus.

      • DarkoNeko
        DarkoNeko
        December 19, 2015 at 10:10 am | #

        totally pillow talk material.

  30. altalemur
    altalemur
    December 19, 2015 at 12:47 am | #

    it is funny and reassuring that Amber was one of the many many teenage girls who thought guy on guy was hot, but didn’t know the exact mechanics of sex when you’re not a contortionist.

    clearly the best way for Ethan and Danny to solve their conflict is to find porn of people in that position and compare.

    • Noclevername
      Noclevername
      December 19, 2015 at 8:59 am | #

      Second best. The best method is experimentation. FOR SCIENCE!

      • DarkoNeko
        DarkoNeko
        December 19, 2015 at 10:12 am | #

        They’ll need amber to direct them, too.

        • Captain Button
          Captain Button
          December 19, 2015 at 10:40 am | #

          Butt who will do the clapboard?

  31. Shiro
    Shiro
    December 19, 2015 at 12:49 am | #

    Oh my god we’re in actual fanfic hell and I love it

  32. miz
    miz
    December 19, 2015 at 1:10 am | #

    I chime in with a
    haven’t you people ever heard of
    closing the goddamn door

    • StClair
      StClair
      December 19, 2015 at 1:13 am | #

      But then we couldn’t have hilarious and/or traumatic misunderstandings!

    • curiousg
      curiousg
      December 19, 2015 at 1:15 am | #

      No, it’s much better to face these kinds of things with a sense of poise and rationality.

    • Peduncle
      Peduncle
      December 19, 2015 at 11:06 pm | #

      In Menage a Trois, there are no lock-enabled doors. Apparently DoA inherits.

  33. brionl
    brionl
    December 19, 2015 at 1:16 am | #

    This is where we need the Chilton’s Guide for Gay Sex Mechanics.

    • ninja_jesus
      ninja_jesus
      December 19, 2015 at 1:19 am | #

      I wonder, if there are normal gay sex mechanics, are there gay sex quantum mechanics?

      • Adam Black
        Adam Black
        December 19, 2015 at 1:43 am | #

        yeah, It called a waterbed.

        • TheGrammarLegionary
          TheGrammarLegionary
          December 19, 2015 at 3:56 am | #

          … I see the waves, but I’m not sure I want particles getting to involved… all I can think of is sand, or crumbs.

          • fogel
            fogel
            December 19, 2015 at 4:54 am | #

            Think tapioca, like in bubble tea.

      • Tenn
        Tenn
        December 19, 2015 at 7:35 pm | #

        If there is, Danny backing away from Ethan won’t make a difference, because of quantum entanglement.

  34. Bicycle Bill
    Bicycle Bill
    December 19, 2015 at 1:31 am | #

    I’ll tell you what — let’s send it to the Mythbusters and see what they have to say about it.

    • inqntrol
      inqntrol
      December 19, 2015 at 1:38 am | #

      I get the feeling they get this kind of weird requests daily, but turn them down beacause….reasons.

      • Silly Name
        Silly Name
        December 19, 2015 at 6:04 am | #

        Adam and Jamie have sweaty, hot mansex. For science.

        • de Combys
          de Combys
          December 19, 2015 at 7:10 pm | #

          :O

  35. Sam
    Sam
    December 19, 2015 at 1:47 am | #

    That alt-text though. *waggles eyebrows*

  36. Adam Black
    Adam Black
    December 19, 2015 at 1:49 am | #

    My response to this page is this:
    ‘I like you Mr Willis’
    ( i dont believe what Jeff and Joel say. wait? Is this comic actually about buttmuching? I cannot tell ? )

  37. Somebro
    Somebro
    December 19, 2015 at 1:54 am | #

    Have to think it is a 69, but one where the guy on top is doing some sort of spider position with his back to the other dude.

  38. Noclevername
    Noclevername
    December 19, 2015 at 1:56 am | #

    “Are you saying your penis reaches from here to here?”

    “Well it does NOW…”

    • de Combys
      de Combys
      December 19, 2015 at 7:09 pm | #

      Hahaha!!

  39. NinjaNick
    NinjaNick
    December 19, 2015 at 2:04 am | #

    I like the awkwardness in this storyline so far.

  40. Precious Roy
    Precious Roy
    December 19, 2015 at 2:11 am | #

    I’m calling the next Slipshine RIGHT NOW

    • de Combys
      de Combys
      December 19, 2015 at 7:09 pm | #

      YES

  41. Jammy
    Jammy
    December 19, 2015 at 2:22 am | #

    This entertains me. Another!

  42. Stormtrooper0914
    Stormtrooper0914
    December 19, 2015 at 3:04 am | #

    Wonder where this conversation is goin.

  43. Noen
    Noen
    December 19, 2015 at 4:08 am | #

    I actually laughed out loud at this, god Ethan

  44. Bagge
    Bagge
    December 19, 2015 at 4:45 am | #

    Amaziegirl outside the window: “I shouldn’t peep, I shouldn’t peep, I shouldn’t peep… daaang, my stories are instructional. NO, I shouldn’t peep…”

  45. 6Qubed
    6Qubed
    December 19, 2015 at 4:47 am | #

    well that got weird quickly

    nice going danny

    (dude just blow him already you’re making this super awkward)

  46. Daisy
    Daisy
    December 19, 2015 at 5:26 am | #

    The mind of an internet pornlord…

  47. Maharhar
    Maharhar
    December 19, 2015 at 6:41 am | #

    I find it cute how Danny’s crossing his legs in the last panel in what looks to be an effort to hide arousal. 😛

  48. Spencer
    Spencer
    December 19, 2015 at 7:00 am | #

    Poor Danny. He was genuinely into a conversation about queer sexuality, but he went too far and now he’s rebounded by back into panic mode.

    The more he acknowledges that, yes, I am into dudes, the happier he’ll be.

    • Li
      Li
      December 19, 2015 at 2:23 pm | #

      I don’t think he’s freaked out about being into dudes, here. I think it’s more a matter of “holy crap I am actually talking about having sex with this guy right in front of me and he’s not into that but he might notice I’m way too into it”. It’s a different subset of feelings.

      Like you can totally accept you’re into dudes and still not want a presumed straight guy and friend to know you’re into him.

      (At least I think Danny still thinks Ethan is straight. I feel like Ethan dodged that part of the conversation during their Questioning meet up.)

      • Spencer
        Spencer
        December 19, 2015 at 2:32 pm | #

        I think he’s better at wrapping his head around “being attracted to guys” than he is “being attracted to Ethan.”

        But like, Danny was actually really, genuinely interested in what he was reading. He was having fun talking with Ethan about it and got into a dorky argument, and he’s apparently heard about Amber’s latest Steve/Bucky fic 30 times from her and has read some of her other stuff. It just became too real when he realized in Panel 4 that he was hypothesizing being in this apparently impossible sex position with Ethan, because Danny’s still has the thought process of “I can’t have an attraction to more than one person at a time, or else I’m a cheater.”

        Ethan also came out to him at the Questioning, and AFAIK he actually was pretty into Amber’s fics that he was reading.

  49. Noclevername
    Noclevername
    December 19, 2015 at 9:02 am | #

    The hard wants what the hard wants.

    • Ntrovert60
      Ntrovert60
      December 19, 2015 at 11:02 am | #

      The hard has its reasons…

  50. Sam
    Sam
    December 19, 2015 at 11:59 am | #

    Wow, Dan moved really fast there. Do I see a sidekick coming on soon for AG?

    • tim gueguen
      tim gueguen
      December 19, 2015 at 1:43 pm | #

      I doubt Awkward Boy would be an effective sidekick.

      • Kaara
        Kaara
        December 19, 2015 at 4:12 pm | #

        https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/db/c9/4e/dbc94e4ed94b3a5b5b960b34edd26305.jpg

        • Sam
          Sam
          December 19, 2015 at 10:55 pm | #

          Yes, exactly.

          • tim gueguen
            tim gueguen
            December 20, 2015 at 3:25 pm | #

            Ron just makes them think he’s awkward. He also has the Mystical Monkey Power.

      • Sam
        Sam
        December 19, 2015 at 10:56 pm | #

        Maybe he can go by WonderBread. His superpower is making awkward talk with villains till they despair of life.

  51. Deanatay
    Deanatay
    December 19, 2015 at 11:59 am | #

    They may both love the D, but they’re nerds first.

    And, it seems, friends second. That’s great!

  52. Emma
    Emma
    December 19, 2015 at 12:21 pm | #

    IS ETHAN EYEING THAT BONER

    No.

    But I wish he was.

    • Emma
      Emma
      December 19, 2015 at 12:22 pm | #

      I’m a big shipper of Danny/Ethan and Ethan/Joe so things are gonna get a bit shippy up in here.

  53. EpikAlia
    EpikAlia
    December 19, 2015 at 2:44 pm | #

    …And now, here comes Amber!

  54. pjeseb
    pjeseb
    December 19, 2015 at 4:03 pm | #

    Nobody’s dick is that long, not even Long Dick Johnson’s.

    • Gubbey
      Gubbey
      December 19, 2015 at 4:56 pm | #

      And he had a fuckin’ long dick.

      • Blue Virtue
        Blue Virtue
        December 19, 2015 at 5:00 pm | #

        thus the name.

      • Kamino Neko
        Kamino Neko
        December 19, 2015 at 5:06 pm | #

        Thus the name.

  55. Pinja
    Pinja
    December 19, 2015 at 5:09 pm | #

    “Definitely not gonna reach”

    Speak for yourself guys!

  56. Kirkybobz
    Kirkybobz
    December 19, 2015 at 6:44 pm | #

    Come the f*ck ON, WILLIS!

  57. de Combys
    de Combys
    December 19, 2015 at 7:06 pm | #

    Moaaaarrr

  58. ItsTheWolfMan
    ItsTheWolfMan
    December 19, 2015 at 7:33 pm | #

    This is eventually going to end in a threesome.

  59. Tenn
    Tenn
    December 19, 2015 at 7:39 pm | #

    Danny and Ethan perform an acting out slashfic.

  60. Micki
    Micki
    December 20, 2015 at 12:28 am | #

    *jumping up and down in my seat*

  61. rachel
    rachel
    December 20, 2015 at 4:17 pm | #

    L&Gs WE HAVE HAIR OVERLAP, REPEAT WE HAVE HAIR OVERLAP

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