Dumbing of Age Book Twelve

Dumbing of Age

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May 12, 2026

Smug

by David M Willis on March 18, 2018 at 12:01 am
  • 03 - Faz Is Great
└ Tags: joe

Discussion (128) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. BBCC
    BBCC
    March 18, 2018 at 12:07 am | #

    That line is always weak, but coming from a guy who had his ‘Do-list’ leaked not that long ago and yeah, I wouldn’t buy it either.

    • Regalli
      Regalli
      March 18, 2018 at 12:20 am | #

      It really takes it from ‘Guy Probably Full Of Shit’ to ‘Guy TOTALLY Full Of Shit.’

  2. Doctor_Who
    Doctor_Who
    March 18, 2018 at 12:07 am | #

    Joe doing Faz!Face is simultaneously hilarious and terrifying.

    Quit it, Joe, or it’ll stick that way.

  3. ANeM
    ANeM
    March 18, 2018 at 12:08 am | #

    If Joe made that graph it wouldn’t be “(Projected.)”

  4. Some Random Name
    Some Random Name
    March 18, 2018 at 12:08 am | #

    Joe please never make that face again

    • Nono
      Nono
      March 18, 2018 at 12:11 am | #

      FazFace is spreading. Like a fad.

      Soon there will be a bitter war between the FazFacists and the Cult of the Triangle Smile.

      • King Daniel
        King Daniel
        March 18, 2018 at 1:00 am | #

        Fortunately for The Ones of the Triangle, there will eventually be a bitter schism and civil war between the FazFacists and the ones who misread their name as “FazFascists”.

      • Teddae
        Teddae
        March 18, 2018 at 1:03 am | #

        Dont u mean Fazcists hehehh

        I’ll go now

        • Inahc
          Inahc
          March 18, 2018 at 2:09 am | #

          My brain insisted on reading that as “faz-cysts” :/

      • Eldritch Gentleman
        Eldritch Gentleman
        March 18, 2018 at 4:31 am | #

        Reminds me that scene from Binbougami ga where the protag turned into Kenshiro to disguise herself, then her rival took it as a challenge, a friend assumed it’s some new fashion and soon Kenshiro faces were spreading like crazy.

      • JA
        JA
        March 18, 2018 at 1:29 pm | #

        Fazcists

    • Reltzik
      Reltzik
      March 18, 2018 at 12:14 am | #

      …. panel 3, you mean?

  5. AnvilPro
    AnvilPro
    March 18, 2018 at 12:08 am | #

    That graph is just a line straight up vertically

    • Zach
      Zach
      March 18, 2018 at 12:11 am | #

      That is terrible! No, The Faz would never do such a thing.
      It is a sharp curve and a DOTTED vertical line. Boy knows graphs.

    • Tacos
      Tacos
      March 18, 2018 at 12:16 am | #

      I could make a dirty joke here about up-ness but I won’t.

    • Kamino Neko
      Kamino Neko
      March 18, 2018 at 12:46 am | #

      Time is usually the horizontal axis, so a straight horizontal line – straight vertical would mean he aroused every woman on earth at once….

      • Pablo360
        Pablo360
        March 18, 2018 at 12:50 am | #

        So what you’re saying is it’s a straight line up vertically.

      • LookingIn
        LookingIn
        March 18, 2018 at 12:51 am | #

        so he’s admitting the truth: no woman will be aroused by him?

    • Sunny
      Sunny
      March 18, 2018 at 8:51 pm | #

      Look again, it’s clearly curved. There’s a small bit where women aroused remains at zero, then it takes off, accelerates, and then decelerates slightly.

  6. Passchendaele
    Passchendaele
    March 18, 2018 at 12:08 am | #

    …is Faz dropping these graphs on purpose, hoping someone will pick them up?

    • Doctor_Who
      Doctor_Who
      March 18, 2018 at 12:10 am | #

      He’s like one of those religious groups that goes around distributing their literature, except Faz’s religion is his sex drive.

      • sdrainbow
        sdrainbow
        March 18, 2018 at 8:15 am | #

        I was pressed into doing this once. I was playing with a university orchestra on a “spring mission trip” to Brazil, which was 6 days of us playing concerts around the country and being tourists, so, awesome, and 1 day of us helping remodel a church, which was fine, until they slapped a bunch of pamphlets in my hand and I found myself walking the streets of Rio de Janeiro, a trio of white, non-Portuguese speaking 20-year-olds trying to convince people they’d been wrong all their lives.

        I certainly wasn’t a Christian before that, but that experience 100% drove the nail into the coffin of my religion.

        • C.T Phipps
          C.T Phipps
          March 18, 2018 at 7:06 pm | #

          Which was the part that bothered you? The lack of care to your situation/preparation or the fact you were evangelizing?

          • sdrainbow
            sdrainbow
            March 18, 2018 at 10:54 pm | #

            The feeling of walking around the streets, handing out pamphlets to people as if I had any authority to tell grown-ass adults they were wrong about their religious choices and should convert.

            • DSL
              DSL
              March 19, 2018 at 8:01 am | #

              My own experiences, memory of which is thankfully dimmed by years, and my present-day experiences tell me that late-teen and college-age humans ought to have the fewest problems telling “grown-ass” people they’re doing it wrong.

  7. shadowcell
    shadowcell
    March 18, 2018 at 12:09 am | #

    still holding out hope this results in the Advent of Wen

    • jeffepp
      jeffepp
      March 18, 2018 at 12:11 am | #

      What? Where!?

      • Bicycle Bill
        Bicycle Bill
        March 18, 2018 at 4:49 am | #

        What is at second base.  (Who?)  Who’s on first.
        And Where must be the right fielder, as that’s the only position not specified in the famous routine

    • Doctor_Who
      Doctor_Who
      March 18, 2018 at 12:11 am | #

      That’s one Second Coming the world can do without.

      “Faz and Wen have had many comings.”

      Quiet, you.

  8. TemporalShrew
    TemporalShrew
    March 18, 2018 at 12:10 am | #

    It looks like that graph shows a gradual plateau, actually. For as obviously absurd as it is, that’s still more self-awareness than I would expect of Faz.

    Although maybe he’s set it up so the graph is over a lifelong period and that plateau occurs somewhere around age 250.

    • Reltzik
      Reltzik
      March 18, 2018 at 12:21 am | #

      “Faz is not limited by self-awareness. But Faz shall eventually be limited by the slow growth rate of the Earth-wide lady population.”

      • Chris Phoenix
        Chris Phoenix
        March 18, 2018 at 5:20 am | #

        I’m torn between responding “+5 insightful” and “But not the growth of their individual excitement, sexual and otherwise, about Faz.”

    • Khyrin
      Khyrin
      March 18, 2018 at 8:45 am | #

      It may also be a recognition of… Please forgive me for this phrasing…. As arousal is something that fades with time, that plateau may be a theoretical saturation point, where he is arousing further ladies, while others are leaving his radius of effect and therefore becoming unaroused.

  9. Nono
    Nono
    March 18, 2018 at 12:10 am | #

    Today’s word of the day: incel

    • Delicious Taffy
      Delicious Taffy
      March 18, 2018 at 3:48 am | #

      Incel: A narcissistic sack of shit who feels he is owed sexual gratification and long-term companionship. Frequently sighted making disparaging remarks regarding women, inventing nonsensical jargon, and demanding government-mandated prostitution.

      • Kryss LaBryn
        Kryss LaBryn
        March 18, 2018 at 7:14 am | #

        I have spent enough time reading fanfics that although I know what it really means, every time I see it I mistake it for an incest label.

      • Needfuldoer
        Needfuldoer
        March 18, 2018 at 8:08 am | #

        This is what happens when an echo chamber’s feedback loop grows loud enough.

      • thejeff
        thejeff
        March 18, 2018 at 10:25 am | #

        See also: MRA, PUA, “Game”

        A common on ramp to the alt-right.

  10. ValdVin
    ValdVin
    March 18, 2018 at 12:10 am | #

    Wait, Faz wrote “I” and not “Faz”? Is that progress?

    • Pablo360
      Pablo360
      March 18, 2018 at 12:51 am | #

      No, it’s whatever the opposite of progress is. Oh, that’s right. Senate.

      • SpaceshipPilot
        SpaceshipPilot
        March 18, 2018 at 6:49 pm | #

        “Faz is the Senate.”

      • emusam
        emusam
        March 19, 2018 at 12:22 am | #

        Progress is going out. Congress is coming together.

        • DSL
          DSL
          March 19, 2018 at 8:02 am | #

          Well played.

  11. Regalli
    Regalli
    March 18, 2018 at 12:10 am | #

    … at least he’s aware incel ideology’s full of shit? Which means either some serious studying the last few days or even he has standards and awareness. Either way I’m counting this as a plus for Joe. But um, seriously. This was a bad idea.

    • tim gueguen
      tim gueguen
      March 18, 2018 at 12:22 am | #

      I just had a scary thought. Faz is probably a prime candidate to end up being either an incel or a MGTOW when his attempts at being a PUA fail.

      • Regalli
        Regalli
        March 18, 2018 at 12:32 am | #

        Disturbingly likely, yeah. (Thank Willis for our timescale meaning we won’t have to see that. *shudders*)

      • vlademir1
        vlademir1
        March 18, 2018 at 1:10 am | #

        I had to look up what MGTOW meant… I generally know of them by a different term.

        • Charlie Spencer
          Charlie Spencer
          March 18, 2018 at 6:14 am | #

          ‘s okay, I would have to look up MGTOW, PUA, and Incel if I was at all motivated. I’m assuming from the context of Joe’s line that incel isn’t anything I’d be interested in, but then I feel that way about Reddit in general.

          • TemperaryObsessor
            TemperaryObsessor
            March 18, 2018 at 7:58 am | #

            Quick Google search Incel, Involuntary celebit men who blame women for “unfairly” refusing to date/have sex with them they generally think its because they aren’t handsome enough. Its actually because of there attitude towards women. Instead of working to improve themselves they hate women and men who date women.
            MGTOW Men going there own way, men who have sworn off women, seems to range from okish to ranting about how the world favors women.
            PUA pickup artist.

            • sdrainbow
              sdrainbow
              March 18, 2018 at 8:18 am | #

              ………………………………………

              I knew what “incel” meant in a general sense, but the actual long form being “involuntarily celibate” makes me want to gouge my eyes out.

              • ValdVin
                ValdVin
                March 18, 2018 at 7:28 pm | #

                I dunno, the fact these guys are so set on the idea to create a dang nickname for it is a whole nother level of squick.

            • cbwroses
              cbwroses
              March 18, 2018 at 2:46 pm | #

              Learned something new

    • DailyBrad
      DailyBrad
      March 18, 2018 at 12:26 am | #

      Joe engaged in misogyny, but even he didn’t go incel levels of misogyny.

    • Emily
      Emily
      March 18, 2018 at 5:58 am | #

      I’ve never got the impression that Joe feels women owe him sex and are horrible selfish harpies who should be literally enslaved if they won’t give it to him willingly.

      • DrunkenNordmann
        DrunkenNordmann
        March 18, 2018 at 6:15 am | #

        Yeah, while Joe is somewhat sleazy, he’s nowhere near the level of myopic misogyny that incels are on.

        • tim gueguen
          tim gueguen
          March 18, 2018 at 11:59 am | #

          The very fact he’s had lots of sex with women makes him ineligible for incelism. Unfortunately he could be slotted into the Pickup Artist category.

          • thejeff
            thejeff
            March 18, 2018 at 1:33 pm | #

            Though he could transfer into that category if his reputation prevents him from continuing to score.
            I don’t think he will, mind you. I think he’s moving onto a better path.

  12. TemporalShrew
    TemporalShrew
    March 18, 2018 at 12:11 am | #

    Also, I was going to say that the joke about the incel subreddit hadn’t aged well, since the sub got shut down, but who am I kidding? Half a dozen replacement subs must have cropped up by now.

    • Reltzik
      Reltzik
      March 18, 2018 at 12:16 am | #

      …. So they’re inincels?

      • Needfuldoer
        Needfuldoer
        March 18, 2018 at 8:11 am | #

        Until they cross the wrong people and end up in cells.

    • Delicious Taffy
      Delicious Taffy
      March 18, 2018 at 3:41 am | #

      They have, and they’re all hilariously pathetic.

      • DrunkenNordmann
        DrunkenNordmann
        March 18, 2018 at 6:18 am | #

        To the surprise of absolutely nobody.

  13. Some1
    Some1
    March 18, 2018 at 12:12 am | #

    Well Faz has yet to say anything about woman all being sluts who deserve to be raped, so he’s still doing better than incel subreddits

    • ZerglingOne
      ZerglingOne
      March 18, 2018 at 12:57 am | #

      Or mention of Chad or Stacy.

  14. Keulen
    Keulen
    March 18, 2018 at 12:18 am | #

    Where was Faz even carrying that graph anyway? Does he have some sort of hammerspace where he keeps graphs?

    • Deanatay
      Deanatay
      March 18, 2018 at 2:48 pm | #

      Yes. It is called Fazspace.

      The opening to it is in his pants.

  15. Reltzik
    Reltzik
    March 18, 2018 at 12:19 am | #

    Panel 3 Joe: You assume much if you think Amber will be disappointed by Faz’s disappearance.

    • Regalli
      Regalli
      March 18, 2018 at 12:22 am | #

      It’s not him being gone that’s the problem so much as him roaming freely.

      • Reltzik
        Reltzik
        March 18, 2018 at 12:25 am | #

        That’s not “disappeared”. That’s “unleashed”.

        • Regalli
          Regalli
          March 18, 2018 at 12:30 am | #

          … You know actually do they make kid leashes that big? Because while I’d normally find such things horrifying, Faz would benefit from one.

          • David DeLaney
            David DeLaney
            March 18, 2018 at 12:42 am | #

            We passed the Child Boutique a few strips back, remember?

            –Dave, also comes with solid lead internet blockers and some of Mrs Piggle-Wiggle’s concoctions

          • vlademir1
            vlademir1
            March 18, 2018 at 1:17 am | #

            Yes they do make them. You likely don’t want to know at least one of the reasons why they do.

  16. Stephen Bierce
    Stephen Bierce
    March 18, 2018 at 12:21 am | #

    *”Runaway” from For Your Eyes Only has been continuing to play*

    • tim gueguen
      tim gueguen
      March 18, 2018 at 12:25 am | #

      “Faz hopes he can pull as many ladies as James Bond has. Of course it will hopefully involve less encounters with SPECTRE.”

      • Stephen Bierce
        Stephen Bierce
        March 18, 2018 at 2:50 pm | #

        Of course, if you know the movie, the scene in which the music plays has 007 being pursued by one of the villain’s hit gangs, who are being led by a particularly nasty KGB assassin. And whatever the production paid the stunt performers, it wasn’t enough.

        • DSL
          DSL
          March 19, 2018 at 8:10 am | #

          What scene does the music play if I don’t know the movie?

    • Remmington Steele
      Remmington Steele
      March 18, 2018 at 3:38 pm | #

      I’m reminded of the The Runaway Train …

  17. SUGauthor
    SUGauthor
    March 18, 2018 at 12:35 am | #

    I’m sure Amber will be thrilled to know that people are still referring to her as the Crazy Stabby Girl.

    • adjudicus
      adjudicus
      March 18, 2018 at 12:37 am | #

      To be honest, that’d probably upset her more than Faz disappearing

      • Emperor Norton II
        Emperor Norton II
        March 18, 2018 at 12:48 am | #

        Oh no, her reaction will be worse than that.

        She will feel validated in thinking of herself as a monster.

        • C.T Phipps
          C.T Phipps
          March 18, 2018 at 1:44 am | #

          I admit, I’m completely uncaring about real life psychology or consequences with Amber and want her to embrace her dark avenger of the night persona completely. Then we can follow her Dexter style around campus as she rids Indiana of rapists.

    • DailyBrad
      DailyBrad
      March 18, 2018 at 1:15 am | #

      A. She assumes that, anyway
      B. It’s Joe, I don’t think she’d give many shits.

    • BenRG
      BenRG
      March 18, 2018 at 3:27 am | #

      To be fair, I don’t think that Joe has ever actually stopped and I suspect that Amber would be concerned that he had been replaced with a pod person.

  18. Queen Anthai
    Queen Anthai
    March 18, 2018 at 12:59 am | #

    I’m 100% stealing “social graces of an incel subreddit”.

    • Delicious Taffy
      Delicious Taffy
      March 18, 2018 at 3:42 am | #

      You can’t steal a negative quantity.

  19. King Daniel
    King Daniel
    March 18, 2018 at 1:02 am | #

    Thanks to xkcd, I’m reading Joe’s line in the third panel as him saying he’d be in “deep ass-shit”…which is still a correct turn of phrase surprisingly enough, if a little redundant.

    • Koms
      Koms
      March 18, 2018 at 2:23 am | #

      I immediately thought that too!!✋

  20. Tarmaniel
    Tarmaniel
    March 18, 2018 at 1:23 am | #

    Was this comic strip drawn before or after r/incels got shut down?

    • MacBone
      MacBone
      March 18, 2018 at 5:42 am | #

      They’re like the hydra. Cut them down, and two more spring up in their place. Napalm is the only solution.

    • DrunkenNordmann
      DrunkenNordmann
      March 18, 2018 at 6:12 am | #

      To be fair, Joe says “AN incel subreddit”, not THE. And as MacBone points out, there’s probably around a dozen replacement subreddits by now, some of them thinly disguised.

  21. cbwroses
    cbwroses
    March 18, 2018 at 1:24 am | #

    I don’t use reddit and don’t know what an “incel” is.
    *goes to Wikipedia for a minute*
    Oh. Well that’s several degrees of messed up.
    I don’t think Faz is quite at that level though.
    Of course, with Blaine as a role model, who knows how badly he can turn?

    • C.T Phipps
      C.T Phipps
      March 18, 2018 at 1:45 am | #

      He’s fourteen and thus all things are sexual.

      • thejeff
        thejeff
        March 18, 2018 at 10:39 am | #

        He’s actually almost 16 and while I won’t argue the level of the sex drive at that age, most kids manage to keep it a bit less obvious – even if it’s just because they’re embarrassed and scared of rejection.
        Faz appears to lack any filters or the concept of embarrassment.

        • Inahc
          Inahc
          March 18, 2018 at 3:07 pm | #

          I went back and looked it up and you’re right, he’s nearly 16. http://www.dumbingofage.com/2018/comic/book-8/03-faz-is-great/handle-2/#comment-1309734

          • C.T Phipps
            C.T Phipps
            March 18, 2018 at 7:03 pm | #

            Then Amber’s treatment is ridiculous.

            • thejeff
              thejeff
              March 18, 2018 at 8:57 pm | #

              Huh?
              If you mean Amber’s treatment of Faz, what is she supposed to do?

    • thejeff
      thejeff
      March 18, 2018 at 10:36 am | #

      Well, his social graces appear about on the same level.
      He still has enormous apparent self-confidence though, knowing that his sexual conquests are just around the corner. Judging by a comment from his first appearance, he’s currently more on the edges of the PUA community.
      He won’t see himself as an incel until that fails him, he accepts that he’s not going to get laid regularly and blames women in general for it.

  22. Kris
    Kris
    March 18, 2018 at 1:41 am | #

    These two no name losers have had more lines than most extras and no tag! Snub! I call snub! Baldy and Curls deserve tags!

    • Delicious Taffy
      Delicious Taffy
      March 18, 2018 at 4:00 am | #

      Dirk and Farah

      • Needfuldoer
        Needfuldoer
        March 18, 2018 at 8:14 am | #

        Yes. Yes!

        Name all the one-off background characters!

  23. Dana
    Dana
    March 18, 2018 at 1:51 am | #

    He got hacked? Is it hacky girl or stabby girl? Make up your mind!

  24. Bagge
    Bagge
    March 18, 2018 at 2:09 am | #

    Change that to “annoyed” and the chart is pretty accurate unless Joe catch the little creep.

  25. Josh Spicer
    Josh Spicer
    March 18, 2018 at 2:56 am | #

    That sub-text made me laugh harder than it should have.

  26. BenRG
    BenRG
    March 18, 2018 at 3:26 am | #

    I agree with Joe’s assessment. Only Faz could have created that graph.

  27. C.
    C.
    March 18, 2018 at 3:48 am | #

    Joe, like many of us, is confused as to what he will be to Faz if Richard and Stacy marry.

    • Eldritch Gentleman
      Eldritch Gentleman
      March 18, 2018 at 4:29 am | #

      Step-step brother, two degrees of separation? Dubstep brother?

    • Tan
      Tan
      March 18, 2018 at 3:14 pm | #

      In the words of Dark Helmet: Absolutely nothing

      • Eldritch Gentleman
        Eldritch Gentleman
        March 18, 2018 at 6:05 pm | #

        Which is what Joe is about to become if he doesn’t catch up to Faz… or so he thinks.

      • Kamino Neko
        Kamino Neko
        March 19, 2018 at 10:34 am | #

        That scene has been running through my head since Joe and Faz met.

  28. DarkoNeko
    DarkoNeko
    March 18, 2018 at 4:13 am | #

    It wasn’t me, my bro vandalised wikipedia from my computer while I was eating !

  29. Eldritch Gentleman
    Eldritch Gentleman
    March 18, 2018 at 4:28 am | #

    Run Joe Run, each second Faz is on the loose your reputation will drop by 50 points… and seeing how it’s already in the negative you Really should hurry.

  30. Bicycle Bill
    Bicycle Bill
    March 18, 2018 at 4:44 am | #

    I want to see the accompanying graph … the one on which one axis is labelled “time” and the other one is “number of times I got shot down in flames (projected)”.

    • BenRG
      BenRG
      March 18, 2018 at 5:40 am | #

      Faz is literally incapable of perceiving that. He tends to see it as ‘playing hard to get’ or ‘thinking about it – push harder’.

  31. Ainara
    Ainara
    March 18, 2018 at 4:57 am | #

    Smugness is a renewable resource

  32. Just a Ian
    Just a Ian
    March 18, 2018 at 6:16 am | #

    Could Smugness be used as a fuel source?

  33. Just a Ian
    Just a Ian
    March 18, 2018 at 6:18 am | #

    i Bet Faz is going to be in that boutique that we saw way back at the beginning..

  34. motorfirebox
    motorfirebox
    March 18, 2018 at 7:40 am | #

    Y’know it’s funny, for someone who just lost Faz, Joe sure doesn’t seem very… Unfaz’d.

    • motorfirebox
      motorfirebox
      March 18, 2018 at 7:41 am | #

      *goes back and checks* YES I’m the first one to make that pun at least in the current subplot.

  35. motorfirebox
    motorfirebox
    March 18, 2018 at 8:16 am | #

    Oh my GOD I just noticed Joe is making Faz’s face in panel 2.

  36. Dara
    Dara
    March 18, 2018 at 11:53 am | #

    Never disappoint the crazy stabby girl.

    Oh, so that’s how you make that happen. HEY, ANYBODY WANT STABBED?

  37. Bagge
    Bagge
    March 18, 2018 at 2:41 pm | #

    So… those strips where Amber’s fears about being defined as the “stabby girl” and people like Sierra and Carla proved her wrong… Joe is now doing exactly what she was afraid of.

    • Les Moore
      Les Moore
      March 18, 2018 at 5:15 pm | #

      I recall it as her expecting to be known as the crazy stabby girl – more than fearing it.

    • GoblinScribe
      GoblinScribe
      March 18, 2018 at 6:21 pm | #

      It’s also worth considering that Joe may not be speaking totally sincerely, and this is probably more thoughtless hyperbole about the trouble he’s in than real belief that she’s going to stab him.

  38. Remmington Steele
    Remmington Steele
    March 18, 2018 at 3:33 pm | #

    “Hey Joe, where you gonna go with that graph in your hand …”

    • GoblinScribe
      GoblinScribe
      March 18, 2018 at 6:22 pm | #

      Mild Prediction: Joe accidentally drops this graph, people think it’s his, and he gets a taste of karmic humiliation.
      Mind you, I don’t want that, but it could happen.

  39. (((Mkvenner)))
    (((Mkvenner)))
    March 18, 2018 at 10:53 pm | #

    Or it’s Donald Trumps.

    I’ll see myself out.

  40. dralou
    dralou
    March 19, 2018 at 12:02 am | #

    The first unnamed character is totally a poseable art figure with a face, isn’t it ?

  41. Tealjoy
    Tealjoy
    March 19, 2018 at 9:13 am | #

    I honestly feel bad for Joe, because he’s at least trying (and failing) to do things right haha

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