Dumbing of Age Book Twelve

Dumbing of Age

A college webcomic by David Willis
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dumbing of age book 10: there is no god, you were just bad at things
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June 14, 2026

Alternative

by David M Willis on September 3, 2019 at 12:01 am
  • 01 - Birthday Pursuit
└ Tags: blaine, ross

Discussion (198) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. Ana Chronistic
    Ana Chronistic
    September 3, 2019 at 12:02 am | #

    this match-up

    not sure if want 🤔

    • Ana Chronistic
      Ana Chronistic
      September 3, 2019 at 12:03 am | #

      dunno if I’d be able to buy a book with them on the cover, Willis, I might have to actually NOT get a make-out tier

      …

      nah

      • Doctor_Who
        Doctor_Who
        September 3, 2019 at 12:04 am | #

        You mean you’re not gonna have Blaine and Ross make out?

        • Ana Chronistic
          Ana Chronistic
          September 3, 2019 at 4:13 pm | #

          Already picked my dads!

      • LeslieBean4shizzle
        LeslieBean4shizzle
        September 3, 2019 at 12:31 am | #

        Make-outs aside, I really do hope that these two are NOT on the cover. Bleck.

    • JetstreamGW
      JetstreamGW
      September 3, 2019 at 12:16 am | #

      This is gonna be an EPIC Charlie Foxtrot.

      • catspaw66
        catspaw66
        September 3, 2019 at 10:42 am | #

        Oh,yeah! The classic FUBAR squad.

    • Jack Faire
      Jack Faire
      September 3, 2019 at 1:09 am | #

      It makes me feel gross

    • Sunny
      Sunny
      September 3, 2019 at 7:23 am | #

      A match made in heaven.

      • anonamousethatscurriesinthedarkness
        anonamousethatscurriesinthedarkness
        September 3, 2019 at 12:34 pm | #

        A match made in heaven but what conflagration will it start?

    • Van Jealous
      Van Jealous
      September 3, 2019 at 8:40 am | #

      New made-for-TV movie…”Blaine and Toe-Dad: A Love Story”.

    • Charlie Spencer
      Charlie Spencer
      September 3, 2019 at 9:18 am | #

      Can I assume someone has already suggested these two for the next Slipshine?

  2. Stu
    Stu
    September 3, 2019 at 12:03 am | #

    Well, at least now we’re getting a good glimpse at how Blaine is able to deceive people as well as he has. He seems pretty quick on the uptake in exactly how to manipulate others, which he’s put to malicious use.

    • woobie
      woobie
      September 3, 2019 at 12:06 am | #

      Stupid others, but sure.

      • Icalasari
        Icalasari
        September 3, 2019 at 12:41 am | #

        Well, manipulators DO pick their targets carefully

    • foducool
      foducool
      September 3, 2019 at 5:36 am | #

      that one is a really easy target though

    • Jay
      Jay
      September 3, 2019 at 7:36 pm | #

      So he’s a lot like Mike in that regard, except he actually uses it for his own gain, while Mike is just an asshole.

      • Unusually Angry Hippie
        Unusually Angry Hippie
        September 4, 2019 at 11:06 pm | #

        And there’s the ‘tangentially related Mike-hate’ for my bingo card. Keep being you, Comments Section.

        But really, Mike’s more of an antihero. Unless he’s being a minor nuisance(Walky’s Books, ‘HAIL SATAN!’, Etc.) just to keep up his ‘asshole cred’, everything he does could be seen as constructive….from a very narrow, Neitzche-esque perspective that sees pain as the only route to growth.

        I’m not saying he’s a good person, but he’s definitely not one-dimensional.

  3. ValdVin
    ValdVin
    September 3, 2019 at 12:03 am | #

    Blaine’s devious cunning is worrisome and outweighs how much I like Toedad being fooled.

    • Icalasari
      Icalasari
      September 3, 2019 at 12:42 am | #

      Way I see it, Toedad will later realize he was being used, see Blaine as the Devil, and try to kill Blaine

      So… I’m looking forward to that fight scene

      • Foxhack
        Foxhack
        September 3, 2019 at 1:24 am | #

        … I’m guessing you haven’t dealt with Toedad’s specific kind of [[ redacted so as to not get Willis mad ]]

        • Solarn
          Solarn
          September 3, 2019 at 6:15 am | #

          It depends on when he realizes it. If it’s in the planning stage, I give him 50/50 odds of pulling out of their alliance and trying it his own way or rationalizing things and staying in. If it’s in the execution stage, he’ll rationalize it and from then on nothing will be able to make him question Blaine. However, if they fail and then immediately afterward he realizes Blaine has been lying to him, he’ll absolutely blame him for everything and attack him in order to soothe his wounded ego.

      • Alan in DC
        Alan in DC
        September 3, 2019 at 6:32 am | #

        It’ll be a weird fight to be sure. Ross got hospitalized and needed a neck brace from one punch from a 90-lb teenage girl, and Blaine was flipped on his ass by a 20-year-old depressed alcohol abuser. My money is on Joyce and A-G wiping the floor with those two in one strip.

        Tag in Sal (to the rescue, Han Solo style), and the show is over in two panels.

        • Sunny
          Sunny
          September 3, 2019 at 7:39 am | #

          Ross was also in a car crash just before where he’d been hanging out of the window. It’s more likely he hurt his neck before he got punched.

          I’ve got a pet theory that Ruth knows some martial arts, she definitely knows about leverage and using someone’s momentum against them. Flipping a person on their ass is actually not that hard once you know how, flipping an agitated person whose point of balance is off on their ass is even easier.

          In a fight between Ross and Blaine I’d say the outcome depends just on how bad that neck injury is. If both were fit I’d bet on Ross, he works out and has mass on his side which means he’s stronger and can take more punishment. Blaine has a bit of a reach advantage, but I don’t think that’d be enough on its own. It boils down to whether or not Blaine can inflict enough pain by targeting the head and neck to make ToeDad stop fighting.

          • thejeff
            thejeff
            September 3, 2019 at 10:36 am | #

            Sacrifice throws are generally harder to do well, though also easier than most throws when the other party has a strength/weight advantage. The difficulty lies in not hurting yourself in the process.

          • Mollyscribbles
            Mollyscribbles
            September 3, 2019 at 1:05 pm | #

            I wonder if it’d be a fight consisting entirely of light pokes to the opponent’s bandaged areas.

    • SuperZero
      SuperZero
      September 3, 2019 at 12:52 am | #

      He now has three minions in place.

      One is an incompetent child that likes Amber.
      One is a teenager who hates him and explicitly doesn’t want to hurt anybody.
      One is an incompetent adult that will easily switch to hating him.

      A dream team it ain’t.

      • Clif
        Clif
        September 3, 2019 at 1:19 am | #

        Faz is not incompetent and has the charts to prove it.

        • Faros
          Faros
          September 3, 2019 at 1:34 am | #

          Think they mean that guy who ratted Sal out to the cops. Don’t remember what his name is, but he’s like, Sal if she had short hair and also was a guy.

          • Tan
            Tan
            September 3, 2019 at 1:44 am | #

            That would be Asher, and he’s the “teenager who hates him and explicitly doesn’t want to hurt anybody.”

            • SuperZero
              SuperZero
              September 3, 2019 at 2:02 am | #

              And I was worried my descriptions were too vague.

  4. Pablo360
    Pablo360
    September 3, 2019 at 12:04 am | #

    ngl devoid of literally everything else watching Blaine manipulate Ross is kinda funny

    • Anywhere
      Anywhere
      September 3, 2019 at 2:42 am | #

      Absolutely. It’s Hilarious. The last week has been EXTREMELY entertaining as long as I don’t think hard about what’s coming down the road. It’s like how the initial interactions between Joyce and Old Gashface are funny as long as I don’t think about what happens later.

      The jokes are always -so good- even when it’s setting up the scenario for The Worst Thing. I think this is what brings me back, because if this were purely a drama comic I wouldn’t find it half as engaging.

  5. Schpoonman
    Schpoonman
    September 3, 2019 at 12:04 am | #

    I don’t know if Blaine is actually competent or Ross is just this stupid.

    • AeromechanicalAce
      AeromechanicalAce
      September 3, 2019 at 12:05 am | #

      Probably more of column B. Cultists don’t tend to be very bright.

    • Marsh Maryrose
      Marsh Maryrose
      September 3, 2019 at 12:12 am | #

      Ross is the living embodiment of the Dunning-Kruger effect.

    • Marsh Maryrose
      Marsh Maryrose
      September 3, 2019 at 12:17 am | #

      Blaine is actually smart and quick on his feet. If he were a little better at delayed gratification, his sociopathy would carry him pretty far, career-wise.

    • DailyBrad
      DailyBrad
      September 3, 2019 at 12:21 am | #

      Yes.

    • Lingo
      Lingo
      September 3, 2019 at 12:53 am | #

      Well Dina was able to trick him into getting on a bus heading out of town…

    • DudeMyDadOwnsADealership
      DudeMyDadOwnsADealership
      September 3, 2019 at 1:17 am | #

      When the hell in this comic has Ross ever truly demonstrated he is on the same developmental level society, God-fearing or otherwise, expects a man his age and level of independence to be at?

      • Slartibeast Button, BIA
        Slartibeast Button, BIA
        September 3, 2019 at 8:41 am | #

        I wonder if Bonnie was the subtle brains of the marriage, getting him to do the sensible thing while thinking it was his idea.

        • Liquid Len
          Liquid Len
          September 3, 2019 at 10:30 am | #

          Probably. I’m sure it’s one of the reasons that Hank said that he thought Becky would make her mother proud.

          Seeing this much more of Ross, it also makes me think that she eventually was worn down by Ross in the marriage, and saw no other way out than the one she took.

          • Geneseepaws
            Geneseepaws
            September 3, 2019 at 6:23 pm | #

            Without an archive crawl, I’m not sure that she didn’t have the pills forced into her.

    • Keulen
      Keulen
      September 3, 2019 at 1:54 am | #

      I’d say a bit of both, though I didn’t expect Ross to be this easily manipulated.

      • Illjwamh
        Illjwamh
        September 3, 2019 at 2:26 am | #

        A person who hears what they want to hear and believes what they want to believe is easily manipulated.

        Look at what he says in the last panel. He’d rather believe what Blaine is saying than that his own faith was weak, or that he was wrong, or that God didn’t help him, so he does.

    • Needfuldoer
      Needfuldoer
      September 3, 2019 at 2:04 am | #

      Blaine’s a criminal mastermind compared to Ross, but that’s relative.

      His temper is his weak point, he starts flailing pretty quickly once he starts getting angry.

    • foamy
      foamy
      September 3, 2019 at 1:18 pm | #

      A *competent* manipulator wouldn’t gloat in order to provide a punchline. I’m just saying.

  6. Mydnyt
    Mydnyt
    September 3, 2019 at 12:05 am | #

    Damnit Blaine is not supposed to be able to make me laugh so hard I snort

  7. shadowcell
    shadowcell
    September 3, 2019 at 12:05 am | #

    Dumbing of Age Book 10: There Is No God and You Were Just Bad at Things

    • Slartibeast Button, BIA
      Slartibeast Button, BIA
      September 3, 2019 at 12:10 am | #

      In Soviet Russia, things are bad at you!

      • das-g
        das-g
        September 3, 2019 at 4:17 am | #

        Also in Soviet Russia, no God is there.

    • Jess
      Jess
      September 3, 2019 at 12:16 am | #

      More like Dumbing of Age Book 10: No.

    • Keulen
      Keulen
      September 3, 2019 at 1:52 am | #

      DoA Book 10: Hmmm, That Does Sound More Believable

    • Deanatay
      Deanatay
      September 3, 2019 at 10:07 am | #

      *sigh* It’s not as much fun when the author does it!

  8. Diner Kinetic
    Diner Kinetic
    September 3, 2019 at 12:06 am | #

    Hahahaha I was worried about where this was going at first but also hahahaha

  9. Joe Moose
    Joe Moose
    September 3, 2019 at 12:07 am | #

    “Sometimes it’s like watching a wasp land on a stinging nettle: someone’s going to get stung and you don’t care.” ― Terry Pratchett, Night Watch

  10. woobie
    woobie
    September 3, 2019 at 12:07 am | #

    Or maybe God showed how wrong you were?
    nah

    • newllend(henryvolt)
      newllend(henryvolt)
      September 3, 2019 at 12:33 am | #

      This reminds me of Roy Moore the ex-senator that lost a race in 2017 refuse to concede because he claimed “God’s will must prevail.”

      My genuine reply to that was just “What if it wasn’t in gods plan for you to win?”

      • Needfuldoer
        Needfuldoer
        September 3, 2019 at 2:00 am | #

        Well, Roy Moore’s an evangelical Republican, which apparently means he gets to use God as a sock puppet account.

      • He Who Abides
        He Who Abides
        September 3, 2019 at 5:02 am | #

        “What if it wasn’t in God’s plan for you to win?”

        Now now, we all know that concept only applies to brown people and Democrats. Moore is chosen by God, he said so almost every chance he got. #SARCASM

      • thejeff
        thejeff
        September 3, 2019 at 7:37 am | #

        Judging from the number of people God’s told to run for office, it’s pretty obvious He’s just messing with them.

        • Wizard
          Wizard
          September 3, 2019 at 8:58 am | #

          Politics as divine practical joke? I find this theory oddly plausible.

      • Wizard
        Wizard
        September 3, 2019 at 8:59 am | #

        It’s funny how God always seems to agree with those types.

  11. jmsr7
    jmsr7
    September 3, 2019 at 12:08 am | #

    Jesus Christ Ross.

    .

    Also, gratz Willis, for making Blaine make me laugh!

    • He Who Abides
      He Who Abides
      September 3, 2019 at 5:04 am | #

      Yes, that’s who Ross thinks has his back.

  12. BBCC
    BBCC
    September 3, 2019 at 12:08 am | #

    The only upside to this team up is they’re gonna hate each other almost as much as I hate them both.

    • JBento
      JBento
      September 3, 2019 at 8:27 am | #

      Pretty sure it’s also an upside that this level of demonstrable stupidity is going to result in whatever they come up with failing spectacularly. Or getting them elected as co-presidents of the United States, one of the two.

  13. Miguel
    Miguel
    September 3, 2019 at 12:08 am | #

    Is nobody listening to them?

  14. AntJ
    AntJ
    September 3, 2019 at 12:09 am | #

    They met two strips ago and Blaine has already abandoned the pretend nice face. That’s even less time than it took with Danny!

  15. Piotr W
    Piotr W
    September 3, 2019 at 12:09 am | #

    … I don’t want this plot threat to continue. I’m scared :\

  16. tim gueguen
    tim gueguen
    September 3, 2019 at 12:11 am | #

    So, how many decades before Ross figures out that last line was an insult? 3? 4?

    • Needfuldoer
      Needfuldoer
      September 3, 2019 at 1:55 am | #

      DoA decades, or real time decades?

      • He Who Abides
        He Who Abides
        September 3, 2019 at 5:02 am | #

        Yes.

  17. Ivy
    Ivy
    September 3, 2019 at 12:12 am | #

    God, it’s like an odd couple bromance comedy from an evil mirror dimension.

    • Slartibeast Button, BIA
      Slartibeast Button, BIA
      September 3, 2019 at 12:23 am | #

      Gee, Blaine, what are we going to do tomorrow night?

      • Ivy
        Ivy
        September 3, 2019 at 1:10 am | #

        They’re Toe Dad and the Blaine! They’re Toe Dad and the Blaine!
        One is a Christian! They’re both a fucking pain
        To prove they are the worst
        They’ll kidnap, stalk and hurt
        We hate them!
        They’re Toe Dad and the Blaine, Blaine, Blaine, Blaine, Blaine!

        • Nymphie
          Nymphie
          September 3, 2019 at 3:37 am | #

          Thank you, i laughed so hard i almost triggered my asthma

  18. artschoolrage
    artschoolrage
    September 3, 2019 at 12:13 am | #

    Bad Prediction: Blaine wrongfully assumed that Ross, due to also not being a good guy/single-minded in his goals, would team up with him and his “cunning plan”, and will get frustrated with Ross because he assumed he’d just be a redneck oaf. During an important part of whatever the plan is that requires stealth, Ross will not follow whatever the plan was and be the downfall for both of them, getting them caught a second time.

    Also, WOG says that no one gets killed. Does anyone get sent to jail? Drop out of school? I can’t see how this plot line could go without Amber (rightfully) hospitalized to deal w some stuff.

    • SUGauthor
      SUGauthor
      September 3, 2019 at 12:15 am | #

      If Amber drops out of school then that means Blaine wins, so I sincerely, truely hope that doesn’t happen.

  19. SUGauthor
    SUGauthor
    September 3, 2019 at 12:14 am | #

    Where has this intelligence been in all of his other appearances?

    • MatthewTheLucky
      MatthewTheLucky
      September 3, 2019 at 12:33 am | #

      Everyone’s a supergenius when they’re standing next to Ross.

      • SUGauthor
        SUGauthor
        September 3, 2019 at 12:36 am | #

        That’s a good point.

    • Foxhack
      Foxhack
      September 3, 2019 at 1:26 am | #

      He’s not angry at the moment.

      Blaine seems to be very susceptible to his emotions.

    • Kamino Neko
      Kamino Neko
      September 3, 2019 at 6:57 am | #

      He’s in his wheelhouse, here. He’s manipulating someone who’s not on guard against him, who doesn’t have a positive connection to the person he’s trying to destroy, and so on.

  20. newllend(henryvolt)
    newllend(henryvolt)
    September 3, 2019 at 12:17 am | #

    Ross you one of these days you haft to consider the possibility that God does not like you, If that wasn’t the case you think he’d design your body without a neck?

    • tim gueguen
      tim gueguen
      September 3, 2019 at 12:20 am | #

      The truth is that Ross used to be 6’5″, but was dramatically shortened by a horrible piano moving accident.

      • Geneseepaws
        Geneseepaws
        September 3, 2019 at 6:29 pm | #

        I gotta archive crawl again, I thought it was an anvil from acme.

  21. DailyBrad
    DailyBrad
    September 3, 2019 at 12:22 am | #

    Blaine’s a smooth enough operator for now, but it’s going to be interesting seeing where his arrogance will get him.

    • Bagge
      Bagge
      September 3, 2019 at 12:44 am | #

      Beat up yet again, I presume.

      I can’t wait for it to happen.

  22. Cholma
    Cholma
    September 3, 2019 at 12:26 am | #

    DoA: Book 10 will feature a cross-over with Pascalle Lepas’ “Wilde Life”, where Blaine & ToeDad meet a Rougarou, forcing the Witch of Summer, Eliza, to slay both of them.

  23. abysswatcher1993
    abysswatcher1993
    September 3, 2019 at 12:30 am | #

    Blaine, if Toe Dad were smart he would kill you for sarcastically explaining how the world works without a god. Now we have Mr. Glass and the Horde ready to cause mayhem in the world… untile the truth is revealed and Toe Dad breaks Blaine’s bones in front of his wife and Faz, traumatizng them and making Faz get the epiphany that he was two steps from being like Blaine.

    • Poofdepoof
      Poofdepoof
      September 3, 2019 at 3:34 am | #

      What are these two steps? I too haven’t had the epiphany that Faz is on a path to becoming Blaine

      • abysswatcher1993
        abysswatcher1993
        September 3, 2019 at 1:01 pm | #

        Step 1: have a failed marriage you fuck up yourself. Step 2: Get into organized crime. Step 3 of 2.5 because it isn’t really a step: be pathetic.

  24. Zellgato
    Zellgato
    September 3, 2019 at 12:34 am | #

    Whelp.
    Danny’s gonna die at this rate.

  25. TlalocW
    TlalocW
    September 3, 2019 at 12:36 am | #

    Oh, man, I made so much pizza money in college off of people like Ross with simple magic tricks.

  26. NinjaNick
    NinjaNick
    September 3, 2019 at 12:36 am | #

    Perhaps Sons of Satan was an overstatement. I dub them the Bruised Brothers. “We’re on a mission from God…to take our daughters.”

  27. William Leonard Reese Jr.
    William Leonard Reese Jr.
    September 3, 2019 at 12:37 am | #

    . . . .Wouldn’t this kind of talk set off ALL of the alarm bells in Ross’s head? This man claiming to speak for god and be sent BY god to help him?

    • Bagge
      Bagge
      September 3, 2019 at 12:43 am | #

      Nah, he wants to hurt his daughter and regards her as property, so obviously he is allright in Ross’ book.

      Ross is a bad person.

    • David M Willis
      David M Willis
      September 3, 2019 at 12:45 am | #

      check in with how much evangelicals dig trump and then get back to me on this

      • William Leonard Reese Jr.
        William Leonard Reese Jr.
        September 3, 2019 at 12:47 am | #

        Ooph. Fair enough.

        • JBento
          JBento
          September 3, 2019 at 8:31 am | #

          Yeah, I mean, “sent by god” is an ACTUAL STEP DOWN from Trump, who not long ago claimed to be the second coming.

      • CJ
        CJ
        September 3, 2019 at 1:30 am | #

        Just yesterday, a friend mentioned pietists digging Trump. It’s incredible what kind of contradictions the mind can ignore.

        • Needfuldoer
          Needfuldoer
          September 3, 2019 at 1:51 am | #

          It helps if you start with the preconceived outcome you desire, then fold, spindle, and mutilate facts and your perception reality itself to draw a Family Circus Billy Line connecting it to where you’re starting from.

          • Delicious Taffy
            Delicious Taffy
            September 3, 2019 at 3:50 am | #

            There’s a really good video by Quinton Reviews about exactly what you just said. It mostly covers the Paul Is Dead conspiracy theory.

      • Foxhack
        Foxhack
        September 3, 2019 at 1:31 am | #

        … see, I wanted to make a Trump comment but felt it would be too on the nose or cause problems.

        (I have no issues with religion in general, just with the kind of people who are so blind as to not see they worship the friggin’ Antichrist!)

    • Illjwamh
      Illjwamh
      September 3, 2019 at 2:33 am | #

      Blaine is telling him what he wants to hear and offering him what he wants.

    • TemperaryObsessor
      TemperaryObsessor
      September 3, 2019 at 6:29 am | #

      Nah the most negative my response to someone doing something I regard as good or well meaning and not harmfull and attributing it to God would be to roll my eyes.

  28. Bagge
    Bagge
    September 3, 2019 at 12:39 am | #

    Spoiler: ToeDad is bad at things

    • SillyGoose
      SillyGoose
      September 3, 2019 at 6:02 am | #

      Narrator: “He was bad at things”.

    • JBento
      JBento
      September 3, 2019 at 8:31 am | #

      And also just bad.

  29. Thursday Violist
    Thursday Violist
    September 3, 2019 at 12:41 am | #

    but wait you forgot another option

    There is a God but also he likes lesbians and dislikes abusive fathers.

    • Bagge
      Bagge
      September 3, 2019 at 12:42 am | #

      God is chill

      http://www.dumbingofage.com/2016/comic/book-6/04-it-all-returns/remembrance/

    • TemperaryObsessor
      TemperaryObsessor
      September 3, 2019 at 6:16 am | #

      Blaine does not believe that.
      Also there is an extremely slight chance that hearing that possibility even mentioned by someone who’s supposed to be on his side will make Ross consider it.
      Honestly I want to say Ross’s faith did falter now, because even if you buy that the feelings God gave her are a sin, despite there being no evidence that acting on them harms anyone, instead of trusting Gods ability to forgive or set Becky on the right path Ross put his faith in a shot gun and the institutions of man.

      • Jhon
        Jhon
        September 3, 2019 at 8:32 pm | #

        Not a shotgun.

  30. JessWitt
    JessWitt
    September 3, 2019 at 1:01 am | #

    Ugh I just get more frustrated the more these subhumans show up.

    By storyline’s end I hope they end up in separate prisons for 15 to 20 years.

    • ego
      ego
      September 3, 2019 at 7:49 pm | #

      you’re too kind. cellmates would be poetically just.

  31. klept0
    klept0
    September 3, 2019 at 1:09 am | #

    This is FASCINATING and I cannot wait to see how things pan out :DDDD

  32. Marsh Maryrose
    Marsh Maryrose
    September 3, 2019 at 1:12 am | #

    There is no foreshadowing at all in panel 3 of this strip, no sirree, not a bit.

  33. Zemyla
    Zemyla
    September 3, 2019 at 1:20 am | #

    Ross’s lines about “God will deliver us our rightful victory” and “Are you saying my faith wasn’t strong enough?” are right out of the Narrativist Framework.

    I would like to explain what “If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again” means to a Narrativist. When defeated, what a Narrativist does is try to do the exact same thing again, but to invest themselves more emotionally in the outcome. Narrativists believe that the reason for their failure is almost always not being motivated enough/trying hard enough, and their answer is always to try and whip themselves up into a bigger frenzy next time. They are following the Grand Narrative and the Grand Narrative always says that if you lose it’s because you didn’t work hard enough.

    • Minotaur
      Minotaur
      September 3, 2019 at 9:51 am | #

      But there’s no narrativium in our universe to make that work!

    • Bagge
      Bagge
      September 3, 2019 at 11:43 am | #

      Wow! That was very well put. Chillingly so. That sorts of thinking crops up in many places, although usually not that severe

    • Jhon
      Jhon
      September 3, 2019 at 8:33 pm | #

      You need to believe in yourself!

  34. Shane Wegner
    Shane Wegner
    September 3, 2019 at 1:36 am | #

    You guys need hobbies and a lesson in daughters, adulthood and boundaries.

    • Bagge
      Bagge
      September 3, 2019 at 1:42 am | #

      and restraining orders

      • Shane Wegner
        Shane Wegner
        September 3, 2019 at 4:12 am | #

        Pretty sure Blaine already effectively has restraining orders against him, at least in the form of college campus security restrictions against him. Would not surprise me if there are more in part of the judgments against him in Amber’s case in addition to the college tuition parts.

        He just sees his concerns as more important than the law. Blaine. It’s you. Your that restraining order creeper who can’t realize when it’s time to stop. You think it’s other people who need those but it’s you.

        Law enforcement is already coming into effect. Guess he dodged getting caught for kidnapping Danny, but the Law already said “No you can’t fire off firearms to try and coerce people into doing what you want, you can’t.”

        The Law is going to keep getting involved at this rate.

        • thejeff
          thejeff
          September 3, 2019 at 7:46 am | #

          Campus security will just escort him off campus. Big step down from a restraining order. There was no mention of such a judgement when he showed up on family weekend, so there likely isn’t anything already.

          Ross is likely to have something about staying away from Becky in the terms of his release on bail, but we haven’t seen it.

          Anyway, since they’re certainly going to escalate to more crimes, it doesn’t matter much. They would just have to be careful not to be spotted before they’re ready to act.

    • Keulen
      Keulen
      September 3, 2019 at 2:00 am | #

      I’m not sure one lesson would be enough for them.

  35. Foxhack
    Foxhack
    September 3, 2019 at 1:38 am | #

    To those of you who gave me condolences yesterday, thank you. All that mess is over with, now it’s just finishing up paperwork and figure out other things, but that’s not really pertinent to the comic at hand. I just figured you folks would like a reply or something.

    *goes back to bed*

    • JBento
      JBento
      September 3, 2019 at 8:33 am | #

      Take care of yourself.

  36. Queen Anthai
    Queen Anthai
    September 3, 2019 at 1:40 am | #

    I can’t read this storyline. It’s legitimately triggering my anxiety. 🙁

  37. Dave
    Dave
    September 3, 2019 at 1:41 am | #

    We in the industry call that alternative: the truth.

  38. Chris Phoenix
    Chris Phoenix
    September 3, 2019 at 1:52 am | #

    Blaine in panel 2 reminds me of this: SFW reading a kids’ book (Sorry to compare him to something cute.)

  39. Danielle
    Danielle
    September 3, 2019 at 2:03 am | #

    what was ross gonna do? try to hit blaine? with a neck brace on?

  40. BenRG
    BenRG
    September 3, 2019 at 2:13 am | #

    Yeah, I kind of figured that Ross’s idea of a ‘plan’ would be to keep trying the same thing over and over again until he either gets irreparably crippled or killed. Because his idea of ‘faith’ seems to be ‘God will give me success because I say he should’.

  41. FacelessDeviant
    FacelessDeviant
    September 3, 2019 at 2:18 am | #

    Toedads moustache is one of his, probably quite rare, good qualities I think.

    Cuz its a Batstache.
    It is the night.

  42. Arianod
    Arianod
    September 3, 2019 at 2:21 am | #

    Goddamit, Blaine is good at this.

    • BenRG
      BenRG
      September 3, 2019 at 4:28 am | #

      Religion contains many useful buzz-phrases for the unscrupulous con-man to use.

  43. Mithras
    Mithras
    September 3, 2019 at 2:21 am | #

    Seriously, Blaine + bus.

    I ship it.

    • BBCC
      BBCC
      September 3, 2019 at 2:26 am | #

      otp

      • SillyGoose
        SillyGoose
        September 3, 2019 at 6:14 am | #

        We call them “Blainus”, which also coincidentally sounds a lot like “Blennorrhagia from the anus”.”

  44. Transgressingwaffle
    Transgressingwaffle
    September 3, 2019 at 2:28 am | #

    I laughed. I didn’t want to but I did. That has to be my new favorite line.

  45. Wraithy2773
    Wraithy2773
    September 3, 2019 at 4:02 am | #

    Also, off-screen, Blaine kicked a puppy.

  46. Abbefaria
    Abbefaria
    September 3, 2019 at 4:14 am | #

    Anyone else hear “You and me (but mostly me)” from The Book of Mormon when looking at panel four?

    • Abbefaria
      Abbefaria
      September 3, 2019 at 4:15 am | #

      *panel six

  47. Shane Wegner
    Shane Wegner
    September 3, 2019 at 4:18 am | #

    Blaine has some skills but for what? Even if this deranged plan works, what’s the net outcome? He will have spent dozens of hours, presumably thousands or tens of thousands of dollars, untold emotional energy, and his limited legal standing and freedom to what? Show a geeky college freshman who is boss? Restore his sense of ego? He lost before he started by investing way too much in a dead end. Amber isn’t stealing these from you, you’re burning them up.

    • BenRG
      BenRG
      September 3, 2019 at 4:27 am | #

      In many ways, he’s like Ross in more ways than one. He isn’t thinking about ‘what next’. He’s just trusting in the narrative that he will get what he wants (because isn’t that the right thing to happen?) and making it up as he goes along.

    • Sunny
      Sunny
      September 3, 2019 at 7:54 am | #

      Also get Amber out of college (dead or expelled or dropped out, doesn’t matter to him), thereby not having to pay for her education any more. College and university are stupid expensive in the USA from what I hear, even the normal ones.

      Also, my understanding is that as long as Ross shows up to the trial the bond money will be returned, but I’m not sure what happens if he commits more crimes in between and gets himself arrested again.

      • Shane Wegner
        Shane Wegner
        September 3, 2019 at 8:26 am | #

        Fair point, although it seems like he has been spending a lot in bail money to try and achieve that financial objective.

        • King Daniel
          King Daniel
          September 3, 2019 at 12:40 pm | #

          Bail money gets refunded on condition that the person on bail shows up for their trial, if I’m not mistaken.

      • thejeff
        thejeff
        September 3, 2019 at 10:33 am | #

        Getting busted also forfeits the bond. And since Blaine plans on having him re-offend, he can’t really be expecting the money back.

        • Luris
          Luris
          September 3, 2019 at 11:41 am | #

          IIRC, Blaine lended money to the church which then bailed Ross. So, assuming the church doesn’t learn (or care) that Blaine has a role in Ross being arrested again, Blaine could very well still ask his money back.

          • thejeff
            thejeff
            September 3, 2019 at 2:49 pm | #

            It’s not clear what the deal with the church group was. He just showed up and offered to help. It could certainly be a loan.

    • JBento
      JBento
      September 3, 2019 at 8:39 am | #

      Blaine is a narcissist. “Restoring his ego” and “show x who is boss” are literally his primary goals in life, and anything he does to attain them is therefore justified, because to him “I’m the best” and “I’m the boss of everyone and you should all acknowledge it” are unshakeable truths. Anyone who so much as speedbumps him is committing an unforgiveable crime against “how things should be”, and all resource expenditure is justifiable in punishing them, and also it’s their fault for making him spend resources at all instead of just acknowledging his obvious superiority from the get-go.

  48. Zaxares
    Zaxares
    September 3, 2019 at 5:14 am | #

    I almost feel bad for Ross, being manipulated so openly by an evil man, but he’s so convinced of his own righteousness that he doesn’t see it. Doesn’t even think to question it.

    • Jago
      Jago
      September 3, 2019 at 6:43 am | #

      Someone once said, don’t weep for the stupid, you’ll be crying all day.

      • Jago
        Jago
        September 3, 2019 at 6:43 am | #

        But in an Irish accent.

  49. Mishyana
    Mishyana
    September 3, 2019 at 5:22 am | #

    I keep finding myself hoping the next strip is police walking up behind Toedad and going “Hah, sorry, our bad, we just remembered that you fired a gun on a college campus and kidnapped your estranged daughter and tried to flee with her at high speed and so you are DEFINITELY a flight risk so no bail for you. Come now, back to jail.”

    • Clif
      Clif
      September 3, 2019 at 8:07 am | #

      Judge sets a bail, cop isn’t going to override it.

    • King Daniel
      King Daniel
      September 3, 2019 at 12:42 pm | #

      As mentioned in the comments a day or two ago, the Indiana state constitution mandates bail to be set for any crime short of actual murder.

  50. Guest42
    Guest42
    September 3, 2019 at 5:36 am | #

    But that last option sounds really believable

  51. Lex
    Lex
    September 3, 2019 at 5:45 am | #

    The Terrible Dads Dynamic Duo is concerning already.

    Blaine’s last line in panel 4 did make me laugh, though.

  52. Aprion
    Aprion
    September 3, 2019 at 6:02 am | #

    And then they got run over by a truck. The karma truck. Who wants to help me drive it?

  53. sunflowerofice
    sunflowerofice
    September 3, 2019 at 7:31 am | #

    Or that god didn’t want you to do it and you ignored him, but i doubt either would consider that possibility.

    • thejeff
      thejeff
      September 3, 2019 at 7:50 am | #

      God wanted you to do it and fail – for the drama of it all.

      • Makkabee
        Makkabee
        September 3, 2019 at 9:50 am | #

        God wanted you to do it and fail because he* loves gay people and he’s grooming your gay daughter for gay glory.

        * possibly she. Or it. Or they.

        • JBento
          JBento
          September 3, 2019 at 10:21 am | #

          Gay Glory sounds like a superhero name.

          • Kamino Neko
            Kamino Neko
            September 3, 2019 at 1:58 pm | #

            Or an Australian ice cream.

  54. DarkoNeko
    DarkoNeko
    September 3, 2019 at 7:42 am | #

    That guy really is so duuuumb

  55. Vulcanodon
    Vulcanodon
    September 3, 2019 at 8:06 am | #

    (Tries hard not to get political, fails)
    This has such a familiar feeling to it…

    • Apostate
      Apostate
      September 3, 2019 at 8:17 am | #

      Sure does, doesn’t it?

  56. bandman
    bandman
    September 3, 2019 at 8:45 am | #

    Tomorrow, a piano falls on both of their heads. End of chapter.

    • Makkabee
      Makkabee
      September 3, 2019 at 9:48 am | #

      From your lips to Dave’s ear.

  57. Slartibeast Button, BIA
    Slartibeast Button, BIA
    September 3, 2019 at 8:49 am | #

    Are they going to go to Ross’s house to discover evidence of Becky’s “burglary”?

  58. Brandon Madigan
    Brandon Madigan
    September 3, 2019 at 8:55 am | #

    Blaine/Ross 2020 – You thought Trump was bad? Hold my Beer.

  59. Rabisch
    Rabisch
    September 3, 2019 at 9:12 am | #

    It’s bad if I like Blaine? He’s just so machiavellian and Evil.

    • DarkoNeko
      DarkoNeko
      September 3, 2019 at 10:01 am | #

      You can like a character and hate everything they do

    • JBento
      JBento
      September 3, 2019 at 10:26 am | #

      Blaine’s a good character. He’s believable, he’s memorable, and though he gets consequences for his action he keeps coming back for more like the narcissist he is. As far as DOA characters go, he’s one of the best written – compare with, say, AG, where you have to push down hard on the accelerator of the supensionofdisbeliefmobile.

      • Daibhid C
        Daibhid C
        September 3, 2019 at 1:19 pm | #

        This supports my theory that believability is an over-rated character trait, because real people are terrible, therefore believable characters are terrible, and I get enough of them in reality without having them in my fiction, thanks.

        • Sam
          Sam
          September 3, 2019 at 5:21 pm | #

          At least in this kind of comic, you know they will lose in the end.

  60. hof1991
    hof1991
    September 3, 2019 at 10:47 am | #

    Blaine and Ross belong together. They start at the result they want and but don’t think through the costs and difficulty of getting those things. They want them so they will have them. This will not be a wacky plan, but directed reasoning.

  61. Gvtprtsgvnit
    Gvtprtsgvnit
    September 3, 2019 at 12:04 pm | #

    That look like a book title to anyone else?

    • Sunny
      Sunny
      September 3, 2019 at 12:45 pm | #

      Anything can be a book title if you look hard enough.

  62. Schol-R-LEA
    Schol-R-LEA
    September 3, 2019 at 12:45 pm | #

    I still think Toedad is going to turn on Blaine (‘the demon sent to tempt me’) once he gets within reach of Becky. And that Blaine is expecting and means to use it as his own exit plan (‘Officer, I was just trying to help someone who could testify against that terrible vigilante Amazi-Girl in court, and then he forced me to come here at gunpoint!’).

  63. Cmd1095
    Cmd1095
    September 3, 2019 at 4:59 pm | #

    On the one hand, watching Toedad be so flawlessly manipulated is satisfying because it highlights how dumb he and his faith are, on the other, Blaine is getting what he wants and that’s bad

  64. Cardinal Country
    Cardinal Country
    September 3, 2019 at 6:32 pm | #

    This isn’t going to end well….

  65. scytheakse
    scytheakse
    September 3, 2019 at 7:07 pm | #

    off topic but there is an add on the left of the screen blocking your comic, dont know if you read these or can do anything about it

  66. Suitora
    Suitora
    September 3, 2019 at 7:18 pm | #

    Damn you, Willis! And on my birthday, too. >:(

  67. ego
    ego
    September 3, 2019 at 8:00 pm | #

    panel 5: toedad’s mustache is gonna crawl off his face and go strangle blaine.

    that mustache really deserves its own tag, if not its own storyline.

  68. ADLegend21
    ADLegend21
    September 3, 2019 at 8:08 pm | #

    can the next strip be them getting hit by a truck? I’ll pay.

    • ADLegend21
      ADLegend21
      September 3, 2019 at 8:08 pm | #

      I’ll DRIVE the truck.

      • Needfuldoer
        Needfuldoer
        September 3, 2019 at 8:46 pm | #

        Make it a bus, sell tickets.

        • ADLegend21
          ADLegend21
          September 4, 2019 at 1:12 am | #

          I love the way you think!

  69. Elsendor
    Elsendor
    September 3, 2019 at 11:53 pm | #

    im so stressed

  70. Armepos
    Armepos
    September 4, 2019 at 11:51 am | #

    Back in higschool there was a group of parents in the school’s advisory board from the extreme right wing. They managed to put security cameras inside and outside the campus (was a big school) to watch the students for ill behaviour, they had put a large billboard on the entrance saying they didn’t want students from the lower income population and from racial minorities (the school was public!). Also they shared mails with the info of members from the students center encouraging to get them expelled. We managed to get the director to get the cameras and the billboard out, but those same parents were still on the counsil by the time I graduated. we could have used an amazi-girl back then, luckily we had the students center and the student members of the advisory counsil (politics are the best if you want to defend the beckys and ambers of the world).

  71. Commander Clash
    Commander Clash
    September 4, 2019 at 5:24 pm | #

    By the time this is resolved I hope at least one is in a wheelchair for life.

  72. Felian
    Felian
    September 5, 2019 at 2:47 pm | #

    Hi Willis,

    is there any possibility you could have trigger warnings on the Blaine/Ross story arc? I don’t know how that could technically be done…
    I just notice it brings up bad memories i don’t want to deal with, but i also don’t want to quit reading DoA completely.
    Otherwise i’ll probably just try to not read it if i see that these guys are in it, maybe that works, too. Or maybe the community has suggestions?
    I love your comic and i also love that it’s deep and showing the very bad people that reality has. it’s just… too real for me atm to read.

  73. Ragingagnostic
    Ragingagnostic
    September 8, 2019 at 3:35 pm | #

    One smart atheist (?) with one very stupid, religious fanatic in a neck brace. It’s basically the smart minion/stupid minion pair-up that you get in the odl commedia dell’arte plays. Fun times ahead!

  74. Micki
    Micki
    September 9, 2019 at 9:28 am | #

    Pleeeeeease let that be the real Book 10 title!

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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 13h
www.ebay.com/itm/23615537... My Siege Astrotrain is up for sale! because i finally found that last goddamn rifle!!!!!!!!!!
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 15h
Some SDCC-ass packaging here
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 15h
it may be a strong indictment of my design philosophy that i can sculpt a reasonable dorothy out of a joyce mesh in like 15 minutes, but boy does it come in handy
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Alt Shiv Posting Service @nameshiv.bsky.social ⋅ 21h
Hortman was a catholic who ensured children got fed and her killer was in a psycho church that demanded violent prayer and guess which one is getting the"Christian" coverage
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
two days to go! www.makeship.com/petitions/tr...
damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatarDavid M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 9d
www.makeship.com/petitions/tr... Wanna Tricerahoodie Dina plush? GO PLEDGE FOR ONE! We need 200 people to make it happen! Pledge period will end in 10 days!
header image - Tricerahoodie Dina Plushie
www.makeship.com
Tricerahoodie Dina Plushie
Dina is so small and quiet that she goes completely unnoticed by most people for long stretches of time. She doesn’t talk much — she prefers to observe. People and how they interact is a puzzle to Din...
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 19h
had a personal trainer for a couple years now, and still i get folks trying to um, actually the situations present in my exermacise strips
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
Other 3D printing adventures: bought this Velocity head on Cults, sized it down a tiny bit (it's meant for Velocitron Override), then painted it and gave it to my Velocity custom made from Legacy Arcee.
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
two days to go! www.makeship.com/petitions/tr...
damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatarDavid M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 9d
www.makeship.com/petitions/tr... Wanna Tricerahoodie Dina plush? GO PLEDGE FOR ONE! We need 200 people to make it happen! Pledge period will end in 10 days!
header image - Tricerahoodie Dina Plushie
www.makeship.com
Tricerahoodie Dina Plushie
Dina is so small and quiet that she goes completely unnoticed by most people for long stretches of time. She doesn’t talk much — she prefers to observe. People and how they interact is a puzzle to Din...
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
Dumbing of Age: "How many" www.dumbingofage.com/2025/comic/b... #webcomics #webcomic
www.dumbingofage.com
How many
Two days left to collect pledges for a Tricerahoodie Dina plush!  If we reach 200 pledges by Thursday, Dina will be made! That sounds pretty rad, I dunno!  Run over there if you want to help make this...
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reposted by David M Willis!
kashana.bsky.social's user avatar
Kashana @kashana.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
Can’t believe nobody wants to go to a soccer game to be kidnapped by ICE
phillewis.bsky.social's user avatarPhil Lewis @phillewis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
FIFA Club World Cup ticket sales tank dramatically after the Dept. of Homeland Security bragged that agents would be “suited and booted" at the stadium in a now-deleted social media post
header image - FIFA Club World Cup Ticket Sales TANK After DHS Says Agents Will Be At Stadium
www.huffpost.com
FIFA Club World Cup Ticket Sales TANK After DHS Says Agents Will Be At Stadium
Tickets to the opening match that were once $349 (and up) could be had for just $4.
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damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
Three days to go! www.makeship.com/petitions/tr...
damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatarDavid M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 9d
www.makeship.com/petitions/tr... Wanna Tricerahoodie Dina plush? GO PLEDGE FOR ONE! We need 200 people to make it happen! Pledge period will end in 10 days!
header image - Tricerahoodie Dina Plushie
www.makeship.com
Tricerahoodie Dina Plushie
Dina is so small and quiet that she goes completely unnoticed by most people for long stretches of time. She doesn’t talk much — she prefers to observe. People and how they interact is a puzzle to Din...
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
www.ebay.com/itm/23615364... selling my studio series 86-11 perceptor! with *jazz hands* instructions!!!
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
....got into spx on the waitlist dreams are real!!!!!!!
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
hey guess who's getting sold next
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
ACAB means Dolly
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damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
Three days to go! www.makeship.com/petitions/tr...
damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatarDavid M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 9d
www.makeship.com/petitions/tr... Wanna Tricerahoodie Dina plush? GO PLEDGE FOR ONE! We need 200 people to make it happen! Pledge period will end in 10 days!
header image - Tricerahoodie Dina Plushie
www.makeship.com
Tricerahoodie Dina Plushie
Dina is so small and quiet that she goes completely unnoticed by most people for long stretches of time. She doesn’t talk much — she prefers to observe. People and how they interact is a puzzle to Din...
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
I think you mean the Slug-Maker
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
today in #9chickweedlane i guess we're memory-holing again that 1997 story where amos and edda kissed for the first time after she, uh, got shot at school
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
this has real "leia comforting luke for losing a guy he just met after her planet got exploded" energy
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
Dumbing of Age: "Locate" www.dumbingofage.com/2025/comic/b... #webcomics #webcomic
www.dumbingofage.com
Locate
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
butts disease
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reposted by David M Willis!
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Unnatural Selections @soundmirrors.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
It’s been awhile since I’ve more seriously read up on Ugaritic and Canaanite religions (alas, w/semi dated scholarship), but this is interesting, and not in a peaceful matriarchal fantasy kind of way.
theradr.bsky.social's user avatarRabbi Danya Ruttenberg @theradr.bsky.social ⋅ 22d
If you do a close read not only of the Bible but the archeology, it starts to look like the Israelites, & all but a couple of Judean kings, worshipped a goddess for pretty much the whole First Temple era. The implications of this are... far ranging-- & her name might not be what we've believed.
header image - Israelite Goddess Mystery Quest
www.lifeisasacredtext.com
Israelite Goddess Mystery Quest
smashing pillars / tracing echoes
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
Have some sticker ideas for Toyhax
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
fellas, is hasbro trying to make toys for children again
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