Dumbing of Age Book Twelve

Dumbing of Age

A college webcomic by David Willis
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'maybe i can ask walky to get ruth to solve thi-- oh'
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June 8, 2026

Kidding

by David M Willis on July 26, 2014 at 12:01 am
  • 04 - The Whiteboard Dingdong Bandit
└ Tags: jennifer, ruth

Discussion (123) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. An Average Loser
    An Average Loser
    July 26, 2014 at 12:01 am | #

    And she still can’t. . .

  2. Jen Aside
    Jen Aside
    July 26, 2014 at 12:01 am | #

    Yourself?

    maybe

    • Kodra
      Kodra
      July 26, 2014 at 12:03 am | #

      She’s absolutely “kidding herself” into believing that she is the worthless incapable person that she’s been building herself up as over the past couple of days.

      She can do something about it, but she has to believe she can before she’ll ever try.

      Poor Billie, Poor Ruth. They could both really use a good break.

      • An Average Loser
        An Average Loser
        July 26, 2014 at 12:07 am | #

        I thought college was designed to form you into hard-wired, coffee loving, fast paced machines of society who strive for efficiency and shuns breaks?

        . . .

        Where the hell am I going with this?

        • Jen Aside
          Jen Aside
          July 26, 2014 at 12:09 am | #

          I hear Kokomo is nice this time of year.

          • indignostudios
            indignostudios
            July 26, 2014 at 2:44 am | #

            That’s where I want to go… Way down to Kokomo…

            • Random832
              Random832
              July 26, 2014 at 7:23 pm | #

              But Kokomo is north of Bloomington.

        • Kodra
          Kodra
          July 26, 2014 at 12:16 am | #

          I feel like college doesn’t really know what it’s trying to do beyond “if we bring enough smart people together and make them live with each other for four years, hopefully they’ll all become smarter.”

          • AgentKeen
            AgentKeen
            July 26, 2014 at 12:26 am | #

            “Oh, and charge them money, so we make money from their pa- I mean, to improve their education.”

          • MacBone
            MacBone
            July 26, 2014 at 1:07 am | #

            Uh, class? Research? Lab? The library?

            There’s this great debate over what college is about. Some people say it’s to gain knowledge, to learn things, to grow as a person. Others, particularly employers, say it’s all about gaining the skills and knowledge one needs to do well at a job. Still others say the most important part of college is socialization, what goes on outside the classroom.

            All of these things are important. That said, this is a comic about making bad decisions, and it’s always fun to see where Willis takes us.

            • Paul
              Paul
              July 26, 2014 at 2:24 am | #

              Whatever it is, I’m against it.

            • Rutee
              Rutee
              July 26, 2014 at 4:30 am | #

              Except employers frequently *don’t* say that. Or they might say it, but not mean it. Even in a lot of skilled labor, labor that actually requires the degree they demand, you don’t necessarily learn useful skills from that degree. And in ones that just accept a bachelor’s or associates, which is a huge number of office jobs, all that piece of paper says is that you did the amount of hard work necessary to obtain it (to the employer). They still have to train you, and your schooling often won’t help with that. The sum and total of your debt was proving you wouldn’t necessarily waste the training classes (Either by not understanding them, or not having the ‘resolve’ to stay with your employer for an extended period).

            • tinfoil theory
              tinfoil theory
              July 26, 2014 at 7:14 am | #

              In my experience, it is to give people a certificate that they belong.

              It doesn’t help with learning: You can learn all that it professes to teach more effectively by yourself, and usually have to.
              It doesn’t help with research: There are too many distracting students.
              It doesn’t help with skills: After graduation, you more than likely keep doing what you were doing.
              It doesn’t help with networking: Where you go and what you do afterwards rarely depends only on who you got to know there.

              It gives you a shiny degree that proves that you have done your time and put in your share of the work and are now part of the community.

              Surprisingly, science progresses. Thanks to the people who stay and teach how to stay and teach, and often despite of them.

          • StClair
            StClair
            July 26, 2014 at 11:56 pm | #

            To serve as a farm league for various professional sports teams, and act as a conduit for transferring money between the alumni-and-other-fans and the athletic department.

            Education? Pfft.

        • Kelly
          Kelly
          July 26, 2014 at 12:16 am | #

          Kathmandu?

          • Nono
            Nono
            July 26, 2014 at 12:20 am | #

            Xanadu.

            • badmartialarts
              badmartialarts
              July 26, 2014 at 12:27 am | #

              The stately pleasure domes await!

              • Lawzlo
                Lawzlo
                July 26, 2014 at 2:49 am | #

                Xanadu: Pretty good Rush song.

                • carl320
                  carl320
                  July 26, 2014 at 11:27 pm | #

                  I always break my fast with honeydew and milk of paradise.

              • David
                David
                July 26, 2014 at 11:20 am | #

                Billie has quite a bit of liver training to accomplish before she can aspire to follow in the footsteps of Coleridge’s opium-induced vision of Kubla Khan.

            • Plasma Mongoose
              Plasma Mongoose
              July 26, 2014 at 12:32 am | #

              Xanadu: Great music and visuals(for its time), subpar movie.

              • Lawzlo
                Lawzlo
                July 26, 2014 at 2:51 am | #

                Whoops, I wanted my comment to appear after yours, not before, but clicked on the wrong “reply.”

                Oops.

                • Plasma Mongoose
                  Plasma Mongoose
                  July 26, 2014 at 3:46 am | #

                  Clicks happen.

        • Yotomoe
          Yotomoe
          July 26, 2014 at 12:20 am | #

          I’ve never seen a college student not take a break.

      • Eukie
        Eukie
        July 26, 2014 at 3:54 am | #

        Depression sucks. 🙁

      • Rachel Roth
        Rachel Roth
        July 26, 2014 at 11:51 pm | #

        Either of them can. One of them just has to step up and say “no more” and take that forceful step past that “this is a bad idea” block. After that, it’s all shaky legged follow through.

  3. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    July 26, 2014 at 12:02 am | #

    The way this arc is going, a runaway truck might be the nicer option.

    • Doctor_Who
      Doctor_Who
      July 26, 2014 at 12:03 am | #

      Optimus saves the day again!

      • Camachri
        Camachri
        July 26, 2014 at 12:04 am | #

        Oh god, Roomies! just got a whole lot worse for TF fans.

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        July 26, 2014 at 12:07 am | #

        Billie needs to transform herself and roll on in.

      • pendrake
        pendrake
        July 26, 2014 at 12:23 am | #

        (Peter Cullen voice) One shall stand…
        and one shall fall…
        …but two may ‘ship.

        ’till all are one.

        • sylvester crow
          sylvester crow
          July 26, 2014 at 1:33 am | #

          You win this thread sir.

  4. The adventurer
    The adventurer
    July 26, 2014 at 12:03 am | #

    door nobs, they confound me too.

    • Kinoko
      Kinoko
      July 26, 2014 at 2:37 am | #

      It also works on cats!

  5. sps48
    sps48
    July 26, 2014 at 12:03 am | #

    Don’t give up!
    the ship?

    • An Average Loser
      An Average Loser
      July 26, 2014 at 12:03 am | #

      Always Salvageable. . .

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      July 26, 2014 at 12:07 am | #

      Man the lifeboats.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      July 26, 2014 at 12:13 am | #

      Sir, The hulls have been breached and we’re taking on water.

      • Ivan
        Ivan
        July 26, 2014 at 12:57 am | #

        They are both pregnant?

        • Yotomoe
          Yotomoe
          July 26, 2014 at 1:31 am | #

          That’s not how this metaphor works.

        • Sara
          Sara
          July 26, 2014 at 4:08 am | #

          It was the whiteboard dingdongs that did it.

      • Rutee
        Rutee
        July 26, 2014 at 4:26 am | #

        I don’t know why people keep acting like it’s worse now than when she found out Billie was drinking still. Like, seriously X3

        • tinfoil theory
          tinfoil theory
          July 26, 2014 at 7:21 am | #

          Stay the course, just veer the sails.

    • newllend
      newllend
      July 27, 2014 at 6:55 am | #

      Hope will rebuild it.

  6. fit-to-freak
    fit-to-freak
    July 26, 2014 at 12:03 am | #

    nooo billie what are you doing please dont give up she still needs u even if you’ve messed up!!!
    (im really sorry guys im drunk but i had to see the comic and then i felt like I had to say something sorry)

    • Kelli
      Kelli
      July 26, 2014 at 12:10 am | #

      People doing things impulsively because they’re drunk is very appropriate to this storyline.

      • fit-to-freak
        fit-to-freak
        July 26, 2014 at 12:33 am | #

        haha oh shit omg your so right im like an example?

  7. Emperor Kiva
    Emperor Kiva
    July 26, 2014 at 12:03 am | #

    OH FOR THE LOVE GOD!

    • An Average Loser
      An Average Loser
      July 26, 2014 at 12:04 am | #

      Just fuck already?

    • Rosicrucian
      Rosicrucian
      July 26, 2014 at 12:04 am | #

      I don’t think there will be Licky Style for the Love God.

    • Emperor Kiva
      Emperor Kiva
      July 26, 2014 at 12:05 am | #

      GO IN THAT ROOM YOU ASS!

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      July 26, 2014 at 12:14 am | #

      Oh for the Love of Booze.

    • gwalla
      gwalla
      July 26, 2014 at 9:21 pm | #

      LOVE FOR THE LOVE GOD
      SKULLS FOR THE SKULL THRONE

      • StClair
        StClair
        July 26, 2014 at 11:59 pm | #

        (the ‘love’ god is Slaanesh, lest we forget…)

  8. Helmet
    Helmet
    July 26, 2014 at 12:04 am | #

    Come on Billie

    You’re at the door.

    You may as well walk in.

    • Maveric1984
      Maveric1984
      July 26, 2014 at 12:07 am | #

      Her lock was changed tho I thought. The key doesn’t work anymore

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        July 26, 2014 at 12:15 am | #

        Her Legs are just as powerful as they were a week ago.

    • Bantha
      Bantha
      July 26, 2014 at 9:39 am | #

      I can only show you the door. You’re the one that has to walk through it.

  9. Yotomoe
    Yotomoe
    July 26, 2014 at 12:04 am | #

    Panel 3: Wobbuffet

    • Mass Confusion
      Mass Confusion
      July 26, 2014 at 12:10 am | #

      Now I can’t unsee that. At least I got a good laugh from it though

  10. Wonder Wig
    Wonder Wig
    July 26, 2014 at 12:06 am | #

    Fight! Fight! Fight! Kiss. Kiss. Kiss.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      July 26, 2014 at 12:15 am | #

      Preferably at the same time.

      • vmgx
        vmgx
        July 26, 2014 at 10:44 am | #

        And on camera

  11. SUGauthor
    SUGauthor
    July 26, 2014 at 12:07 am | #

    Cmon Billie! You have to at least try!

    • An Average Loser
      An Average Loser
      July 26, 2014 at 12:08 am | #

      This is trying. . . in it’s own special way?

  12. Stephen Bierce
    Stephen Bierce
    July 26, 2014 at 12:08 am | #

    *plays Paul Simon’s “Loves Me Like A Rock” on the Muzak*

  13. Vael
    Vael
    July 26, 2014 at 12:08 am | #

    What if this ended up as the opposite of Roomies!, where instead of Ruth dying and Billie losing the one she loved, and Billie died, and Ruth realized she lost her?

    Few months ago, I would have said this was too sad for DoA, but now I’m not sure anymore. Damnit Willis.

    • Camachri
      Camachri
      July 26, 2014 at 12:12 am | #

      Willis has already said there’s gonna be no dying in Dumbing of Age, mainly ’cause if anyone died the cast would be in mourning for over a year our time. Which is no fun.

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        July 26, 2014 at 12:16 am | #

        Which makes this part, PRETTY damn anti-climactic. I mean, maybe the worst is Ruth will be ALMOST dying or something but we’re guerenteed no cadavers this time around.

        • Kodra
          Kodra
          July 26, 2014 at 12:20 am | #

          I feel like the moments we see right now are the reflections of the characters. We aren’t seeing Ruth right now, we’re seeing Billie, and how she views herself and her place in the world.

        • ninja_jesus
          ninja_jesus
          July 26, 2014 at 12:48 am | #

          Agreed, the element of surprise is somewhat spoiled, but there are worse things than death in this world.

          • Yotomoe
            Yotomoe
            July 26, 2014 at 12:51 am | #

            Well normally I’d ask how you’d know, but you’re Jesus, so you probably know more about death than I do.

            • tinfoil theory
              tinfoil theory
              July 26, 2014 at 7:24 am | #

              Like, repeatedly being eaten alive by your followers.

              • Kintrex
                Kintrex
                July 26, 2014 at 2:53 pm | #

                Hey, he TOLD us to do that.

        • Ivan
          Ivan
          July 26, 2014 at 1:06 am | #

          I think if someone died, and Amazi-Zombie appeared just to eat them (and then disappeared forever) that would close the loop quick, clean out a character or two, and there would be shock – but no mourning!

          Suddenly it’s Halloween and everyone just moves forward cracking jokes about whoever gets eaten rising on Easter for Joyce!

          IT’S A WINNER, Willis! I hereby grant you free and unhindered use of the idea for a PDF of any/all SlipShine strips!

          (Girl zombies eating a dong is not Slipshine material… but it is slapstick!!)

      • Nono
        Nono
        July 26, 2014 at 12:21 am | #

        We could have Blaine or Faz die! Then all would be gravy.

  14. VizardJeffhog
    VizardJeffhog
    July 26, 2014 at 12:08 am | #

    NONONONONONONONONONONONONONONO!!!!!

  15. MrSirk
    MrSirk
    July 26, 2014 at 12:10 am | #

    Come on Billie grow a pair and show us the badass take no shit cheerleader hero we all know you are.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      July 26, 2014 at 12:17 am | #

      If you’d look just a bit bellow the neck you’ll see that Billie has worked HARD at growing a pair.

      • MrSirk
        MrSirk
        July 26, 2014 at 1:03 am | #

        Heh.

    • Kodra
      Kodra
      July 26, 2014 at 12:18 am | #

      She’s spent the past day stewing on the fact that her self-image is a hollow lie. Her one supposed success had nothing to do with her. That part of her brain will just keep reminding her of her failures.

      • tinfoil theory
        tinfoil theory
        July 26, 2014 at 7:33 am | #

        Ruth becoming sober has nothing to do with her?

        • begbert2
          begbert2
          July 26, 2014 at 12:34 pm | #

          Maybe he was talking about the Dorothy/Walky hookup?

  16. Regalli
    Regalli
    July 26, 2014 at 12:10 am | #

    Ruth. Billie. PLEASE. SEEK HELP. IMMEDIATELY. PROFESSIONAL HELP.

  17. caesaria82
    caesaria82
    July 26, 2014 at 12:13 am | #

    Gutpunch right into the ~feels region.

  18. Kodra
    Kodra
    July 26, 2014 at 12:14 am | #

    You know, we really don’t know very much about Billie as told from the horses mouth. I never really thought about it but she’s a very private person. Part of that is her home life, which sounds atrocious, but as a result I don’t think Ruth really comprehends Billie as a fully realized person.

    Ruth on the other hand made herself incredibly vulnerable and was betrayed and that hurt a lot. Billie has her own hangups though that we really don’t know about. We know she likes to get drunk, but we don’t really know why.

    This is a long rambling round about way to saying Billie tried to further the relationship by reciprocating physically, but I think to save the relationship she needs to reciprocate emotionally as well. Ruth needs to see her as she is. She needs to talk to her.

  19. Gigafreak
    Gigafreak
    July 26, 2014 at 12:22 am | #

    “…and why are there penises on all the doors today?”

  20. Googergeiger
    Googergeiger
    July 26, 2014 at 12:23 am | #

    Damnit Billie, you still need to APOLOGIZE.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      July 26, 2014 at 12:27 am | #

      It’s too late to apologize.

      • ninja_jesus
        ninja_jesus
        July 26, 2014 at 12:45 am | #

        It’s too laaaaaate.

  21. JessWitt
    JessWitt
    July 26, 2014 at 12:25 am | #

    The tension, I can’t take it. (!!)

  22. Kernanator
    Kernanator
    July 26, 2014 at 12:27 am | #

    I’m pretty sure these two are going to make me go gray prematurely.

  23. Pyr05
    Pyr05
    July 26, 2014 at 12:27 am | #

    Who am I kidding, I don’t need TWO hands to open a door! (Unless you’re suggesting she’s got a BAD case of Capral Tunnel)

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      July 26, 2014 at 12:35 am | #

      She’s been doing a lot of work on her lower body, but has neglected her upper body so much that she’s not sure if one hand will be enough.

  24. Opus the Poet
    Opus the Poet
    July 26, 2014 at 12:29 am | #

    You can do it Billie! Show her you still care.

  25. Ragnal
    Ragnal
    July 26, 2014 at 12:29 am | #

    NO. SHUT UP.

    GET IN THAT ROOM. TELL RUTH YOU WERE GONNA SAY SHIT BEFORE YOU MADE OUT. TELL HER YOU’RE SORRY.

    THIS ISN’T ROCKET SCIENCE, BILLIE. IF ETHAN CAN COME OUT TO JOYCE NO PROBLEM, THIS STORYLINE CAN END NEXT WEEK. BOOM.

    GET IN THAT ROOM NOW.

    • Lamachine
      Lamachine
      July 26, 2014 at 2:23 am | #

      YES

    • Rachel Roth
      Rachel Roth
      July 26, 2014 at 11:56 pm | #

      And if you find yourself out of confidence, Ruth will have you conveniently metaphorically cornered to force you to do what you have to.

  26. ninja_jesus
    ninja_jesus
    July 26, 2014 at 12:51 am | #

    Say it with me, Billie!

    Head cheerleader! Problem solver!

    Now go dawn your cheerleader uniform and fucking prove it!

    Bring out that inner-Cordelia, god damn it!

    • ninja_jesus
      ninja_jesus
      July 26, 2014 at 12:54 am | #

      don*

      Grammar God Yankovic, please don’t forsake this fallen warrior of Grammar Justice.

      • spaceinvader42
        spaceinvader42
        July 26, 2014 at 1:26 am | #

        Not to be a semantics Nazi, but technically that’s a spelling mistake, not a grammar mistake.

        • nekobawt
          nekobawt
          July 26, 2014 at 4:21 am | #

          can we please just stop comparing people who are particular about sentence structure and word use to nazis? like, can the “grammar nazi” thing just die forever? cuz that’d be great.

          • ninja_jesus
            ninja_jesus
            July 26, 2014 at 5:02 am | #

            That’s just what the Nazi’s want. >:(

          • Rutee
            Rutee
            July 26, 2014 at 5:40 am | #

            +1

          • Kernanator
            Kernanator
            July 26, 2014 at 12:34 pm | #

            Apparently, the Finnish idiom for “grammar nazi” is “comma fucker”. So I’d say that’s a good replacement.

          • begbert2
            begbert2
            July 26, 2014 at 12:37 pm | #

            But what other term should we use for people who are picky and efficient and also the worst people ever?

    • Bantha
      Bantha
      July 26, 2014 at 9:51 am | #

      Yeah…only Cordelia didn’t so much solve problems as create them. Even when she stopped being a bongo…she created nothing but problems for Angel. We don’t want Billie channeling Cordy here 😛

      • Cybersnark
        Cybersnark
        July 26, 2014 at 10:28 am | #

        Yeah. Forget Cordy; be Kim Possible.

      • ninja_jesus
        ninja_jesus
        July 31, 2014 at 11:49 am | #

        But at least she was confident while doing so. Or at least put on the bravado of confidence quite well. 😛

    • AgentKeen
      AgentKeen
      July 26, 2014 at 6:40 pm | #

      That’s what Billie really means in the last panel. She’s going to go put on a cheerleader uniform to give her the strength to bust down that door!

  27. Idon'tcarenomore
    Idon'tcarenomore
    July 26, 2014 at 2:25 am | #

    The friggin’ problems of typical alcoholics. What comes first the booze or..?

    What does Billie want the most, choosing between booze and Ruth?

    It doesn’t really matter, because she will chose booze everytime: unless she gets help.

    Get help Billie, you and Ruth talked about AA once. Go do it. Now.

  28. Idon'tcarenomore
    Idon'tcarenomore
    July 26, 2014 at 2:27 am | #

    Why I say to myself, am I getting major feels for fictional characters?

    Because Willis is a major artist with characters, and this is a close subject I guess.

    wtg Mr. W.

  29. newllend
    newllend
    July 26, 2014 at 3:20 am | #

    Baby don’t hurt me no more.

  30. dekho1
    dekho1
    July 26, 2014 at 3:26 am | #

    Okay, now I officially understand nothing. What’s going on? What did she realize in yesterday’s strip? Please help me, those who understand American psychology 🙂

    • Eukie
      Eukie
      July 26, 2014 at 3:52 am | #

      She thought in yesterday’s strip that Ruth’s words meant the latter was planning to kill herself (or, at best, that she was going to drink heavily, which Billie has a pressing fear will cause Ruth’s death; see Guardian). Today, she’s reflecting back to their previous interaction, where she ended up hurting Ruth. This comes at the end of a rather harrowing period of being told that she has accomplished nothing (and being able to help others is a source of pride to Billie). In short, she realizes/becomes convinced that just like all the other times she’s tried to help someone, it’ll come to nothing. So why bother?

      (Or I could be completely wrong.)

  31. Rutee
    Rutee
    July 26, 2014 at 5:43 am | #

    Ah, Billie, Ruth. You two are goin to make me wait for my payoff for a really god damn long time, aren’t you? You might even beat Violent Murasame and Ushio. Damn you, Willis – not for the drama, but for its sheer RL length. And double damn you for leaving me with the knowledge you can’t reasonably go faster.

    • Rutee
      Rutee
      July 26, 2014 at 5:45 am | #

      Also, poor the both of them. I’ve been at that ‘I’m useless and therefore can’t help the only person i actually love’ stage. it is… nothing I would wish on another human. And nothing external we’ve seen in Billie’s life looks like it’s a solid anchor to recover from (if such is possible) *and* the one she loves is justifiably pissed off at her for getting pissed. That’s… just a bad place, and I hope it gets better.

      and that they bang.

  32. Aolbain
    Aolbain
    July 26, 2014 at 6:41 am | #

    Does the megapost mean that this particular mini-arc is over?

  33. hubble
    hubble
    July 26, 2014 at 7:28 am | #

    Dear author of this webcomic, please make sure that Ruth is fine and doesn’t do anything stupid. I really worry she might 🙁

  34. Kugai
    Kugai
    July 26, 2014 at 6:56 pm | #

    [HanSoloVoice]”I’ve got a bad feeling about this.”[/HanSoloVoice]

  35. nothri
    nothri
    July 26, 2014 at 9:22 pm | #

    You know, Billie, while your focusing in on little bits and pieces of things Ruth has said in a conditional manner, maybe you should remember this one:

    http://www.dumbingofage.com/2014/comic/book-4/01-the-only-dope-for-me-is-you/taste/

    “You lie to me again, and I will hate you forever.”

    Now, just like you can extrapolate from what she said about not drinking YET to imply that she will be drinking at some point you can extrapolate from FOREVER that, having not lied to her again, she intends to stop hating you at some point.

    Now don’t get me wrong. You really, really, really fucked up on this one. But…well, if you let the fuck ups of the past interfere with you being a better person in the now…that’s basically the opposite of learning from your mistakes, ya know?

    Also also, if you stop drinking right now it will be completely obvious to anyone who knows what to look for, and might just go a little ways to redeeming your dumbass in someone’s eyes. Even trying to quite might count for something. It certainly can’t make her opinion of you any WORSE, know what I’m saying?

  36. Davidbean
    Davidbean
    July 26, 2014 at 10:54 pm | #

    Ok, so I only just found this web comic after seeing an advertisement on the ggar page and… I love this. The characters, the issues. I find myself able to empathize with most of the cast.

  37. LoserBoi
    LoserBoi
    July 27, 2014 at 12:29 am | #

    Dammit, let them bang! to be honest, if they didnt end up together I’d probably like that more, just because the author decided to skip the love story and be original.

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