Dumbing of Age Book Twelve

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May 12, 2026

Sausage

by David M Willis on July 31, 2015 at 12:01 am
  • 04 - Walking with Dina
└ Tags: danny, dina, ethan

Discussion (216) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. Jen Aside
    Jen Aside
    July 31, 2015 at 12:01 am | #

    I always feel like… somedino’s WATCHING meeeeeee…

    • Jen Aside
      Jen Aside
      July 31, 2015 at 12:01 am | #

      also [insert cockblock joke here]

      • Mr. Random
        Mr. Random
        July 31, 2015 at 12:02 am | #

        …………..

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        July 31, 2015 at 12:03 am | #

        {insert joke about where exactly is “here” here]

      • Maveric1984
        Maveric1984
        July 31, 2015 at 12:08 am | #

        [insert insurance joke here]

        • Halloween Jack
          Halloween Jack
          July 31, 2015 at 11:12 am | #

          [insert insertion joke here]

          • Soundwave the Superior
            Soundwave the Superior
            July 31, 2015 at 8:12 pm | #

            [insert [insert joke here] here]

      • John
        John
        July 31, 2015 at 1:42 am | #

        She’s preventing a threesome with both of them and Amber, It’s a Triceracockblock.

        • Flohomie
          Flohomie
          July 31, 2015 at 2:30 am | #

          Youre using the colloquial definition. A true tricercockblock needs to involve Sarah and 3 males one being an observer (in order for it to remain a threesome)

          According to fanan theory, it would be Jacob and Joe partnered with Sarah, with Danny being the most eligable to remain on the sidelines.

          • gkheyf
            gkheyf
            July 31, 2015 at 8:10 am | #

            surely it should be jacob and other jacob

      • Richie
        Richie
        July 31, 2015 at 12:21 pm | #

        Then it would have to be Big Sausage pizza…

      • Znayx
        Znayx
        November 29, 2015 at 2:22 am | #

        STOP SAUSAGE(pizza)-BLOCKING ME!

        There’s your joke sir.

        • Znayx
          Znayx
          November 29, 2015 at 2:23 am | #

          Eh, on second thought that was kinda obvious. I swear I’m funny some times!

    • Stephen R. Bierce
      Stephen R. Bierce
      July 31, 2015 at 12:02 am | #

      You Rock…well.

      • Lieutenant Dan
        Lieutenant Dan
        July 31, 2015 at 12:06 am | #

        I see what you did there.

    • Scoops
      Scoops
      July 31, 2015 at 12:03 am | #

      And I have no privacy!

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7YvAYIJSSZY

      • otusasio451
        otusasio451
        July 31, 2015 at 12:08 am | #

        Ohhh-ohh-OHHH-oh!

      • WolfLann
        WolfLann
        July 31, 2015 at 10:24 am | #

        I like this version too.
        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xkf95onRgcc

        Also called it! Dina was just off panel this whole time, Unnoticed.

        • WolfLann
          WolfLann
          July 31, 2015 at 10:28 am | #

          Just remembered there was some dance music from the 90’s with a chorus that sounded like that song too.
          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rAnmLLRphqo

    • Freezer
      Freezer
      July 31, 2015 at 1:07 am | #

      And I have no privacy! (Sad lack of 80s pop song knowledge here).

    • Yet_One_More_Idiot
      Yet_One_More_Idiot
      July 31, 2015 at 6:15 pm | #

      WELCOME!…to the Internation House of Sausage. 😛

    • Cedric Y. Berman
      Cedric Y. Berman
      July 31, 2015 at 9:41 pm | #

      Every single day… Every move you make… Every smile you fake… I’ll be waaatching you.

  2. Stephen R. Bierce
    Stephen R. Bierce
    July 31, 2015 at 12:01 am | #

    She used a contraction!

    • Stephen R. Bierce
      Stephen R. Bierce
      July 31, 2015 at 12:03 am | #

      RICH MAN IN ROLLS-ROYCE #1: Baloney!
      RICH MAN IN ROLLS-ROYCE #2: Weiner!

      • Stephen R. Bierce
        Stephen R. Bierce
        July 31, 2015 at 12:08 am | #

        Another Classic Of Madison Avenue

      • Maveric1984
        Maveric1984
        July 31, 2015 at 12:14 am | #

        RICH MAN IN A ROLLS-ROYCE #3: Grey Poupon!

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          July 31, 2015 at 12:55 am | #

          Strange, my poupon is whiter.

    • Doctor_Who
      Doctor_Who
      July 31, 2015 at 12:03 am | #

      Pizza is serious business. Bevity was called for.

    • electromagneticDestroyosaur
      electromagneticDestroyosaur
      July 31, 2015 at 2:21 am | #

      Sarah’s advice is Serious Business, and not to be taken lightly.

  3. Thor
    Thor
    July 31, 2015 at 12:01 am | #

    Lot of sausage-blocking going on here.

    • StClair
      StClair
      July 31, 2015 at 6:46 am | #

      Yeah, guys, stop keeping all the sausage for yourselves.

      • Freemage
        Freemage
        July 31, 2015 at 10:47 am | #

        Share the sausage! Share it with everyone who wants it!

        • Church
          Church
          July 31, 2015 at 1:33 pm | #

          And show us! somewhere our credit cards can regret!

  4. Khantalas
    Khantalas
    July 31, 2015 at 12:01 am | #

    I don’t know why, but I snickered at the title. I’m an awful person.

  5. Marc in MN
    Marc in MN
    July 31, 2015 at 12:02 am | #

    Incoming sausage innuendos in 3…2…1…

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      July 31, 2015 at 12:05 am | #

      In-your-end-ohs began before the first comment.

    • Paul
      Paul
      July 31, 2015 at 9:28 am | #

      Love flies out the door when sausage comes innuendo.

    • motorfirebox
      motorfirebox
      July 31, 2015 at 9:59 am | #

      Incoming sausage in 3…

    • Halloween Jack
      Halloween Jack
      July 31, 2015 at 11:13 am | #

      Do not google “Big Sausage Pizza”. Do NOT.

      • Ples
        Ples
        July 31, 2015 at 10:38 pm | #

        You leave me no choice but to do so.

      • Ples
        Ples
        July 31, 2015 at 10:41 pm | #

        Oh God there was a penis, inside the pizza, and there was a woman grabbing the penis.

  6. Mr. Random
    Mr. Random
    July 31, 2015 at 12:02 am | #

    Don’t block the food. It’s why everyone’s here.

  7. Usayasha
    Usayasha
    July 31, 2015 at 12:02 am | #

    Buy Dina, they need that for their sausage fest.

    • Usayasha
      Usayasha
      July 31, 2015 at 12:04 am | #

      Dang, I ended up with a typo. This goes to show that one should never rush their puns.

    • electromagneticDestroyosaur
      electromagneticDestroyosaur
      July 31, 2015 at 2:23 am | #

      Although the Whiteboard Dingdong Bandit is in attendance, everyone is too late for the Sausage Festival.

    • zee
      zee
      July 31, 2015 at 8:27 am | #

      damn. Beat me to it.

  8. LiaHansen
    LiaHansen
    July 31, 2015 at 12:02 am | #

    i went to one of these awkward gay meetings yesterday. they had bad cake and cards against humanity.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      July 31, 2015 at 12:05 am | #

      How bad was the cake?

      • LiaHansen
        LiaHansen
        July 31, 2015 at 12:13 am | #

        it was still cake so y’know like meh

        • Deanatay
          Deanatay
          July 31, 2015 at 11:27 am | #

          Probably industrial sheet cake with that plasticky frosting you find a grocery store bakeries across the country. Nasty stuff – I only ate two slices before I got tired of it.

          Or worse. FONDANT. *shiver*

    • Leorale
      Leorale
      July 31, 2015 at 12:09 am | #

      How can cake be bad?
      They should’ve invited more asexual people. I hear they’re the best at having cake.

      • -Sentinel-
        -Sentinel-
        July 31, 2015 at 12:14 am | #

        But sexual people not only have cake, they EAT IT too!

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        July 31, 2015 at 12:17 am | #

        Agreed, I rather not have sexual people “having” any cakes I wanted to eat.

    • Bagge
      Bagge
      July 31, 2015 at 1:04 am | #

      No sausage pizza? Lame

    • Disloyal Subject
      Disloyal Subject
      July 31, 2015 at 4:33 am | #

      Regular CAH feels positively tame when you get used to the internet’s custom expansions… unless someone’s owned it for a while and some of the blank cards have horrific anecdotes penned in, then it’s great.

  9. The Thing
    The Thing
    July 31, 2015 at 12:02 am | #

    >Sausage Pizza

    I GET IT!

  10. Saru
    Saru
    July 31, 2015 at 12:03 am | #

    If you feel uncomfortable, somebody else is probably doing something wrong. A mantra to live by.

    • Someone
      Someone
      July 31, 2015 at 12:11 am | #

      Because you are perfect and should never strive to improve. It’s everyone else who is terrible.

      • A Scientist
        A Scientist
        July 31, 2015 at 1:41 am | #

        Finally, Someone gets it!

  11. chris73
    chris73
    July 31, 2015 at 12:04 am | #

    Well they’re talking so thats a good sign but its still awkward so what they really need here is an injection of…Joyce

    • TheOtherDibbler
      TheOtherDibbler
      July 31, 2015 at 12:06 am | #

      …to make it more awkward? Or so someone in the conversation is even more awkward than the guys are?

      • chris73
        chris73
        July 31, 2015 at 12:06 am | #

        Yes to both but really just to make it even more awkward

        • gkheyf
          gkheyf
          July 31, 2015 at 8:17 am | #

          joyce: ‘helping’ situations whenever she gets the chance

  12. Andr3wtime
    Andr3wtime
    July 31, 2015 at 12:04 am | #

    I wonder when was the last time I ever just said, “That was a good comic!” instead of trying to make a relevant joke.

  13. TheOtherDibbler
    TheOtherDibbler
    July 31, 2015 at 12:05 am | #

    Return of the Dina!

  14. Not First
    Not First
    July 31, 2015 at 12:06 am | #

    And yet Dana’s the one doing the sausage-blocking

    • Opus the Poet
      Opus the Poet
      July 31, 2015 at 12:20 am | #

      Dana isn’t even AT UI, how is she blocking anything? Especially blacking anything in the “questioners meetup”.

  15. Arkantos
    Arkantos
    July 31, 2015 at 12:06 am | #

    Ha Ha, dick jokes.

  16. newllend(henryvolt)
    newllend(henryvolt)
    July 31, 2015 at 12:06 am | #

    Danny: “I feel like there’s eyes on me constantly .”

    Me: Congrats you now know how every woman feels when they leave their house in a skin tight top and shorts.

    • Leorale
      Leorale
      July 31, 2015 at 12:10 am | #

      It doesn’t matter how I’m dressed. I feel that way anyhow.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      July 31, 2015 at 12:12 am | #

      And also how men feel when they wear their day-glo codpieces, the shaming must stop.

    • Bagge
      Bagge
      July 31, 2015 at 1:06 am | #

      Yup. A difference though is that most women’s situation are not primarily triceratopcy in nature.

    • PumpkinCake
      PumpkinCake
      July 31, 2015 at 5:56 am | #

      *a queer character voices his discomfort at being at an LGBT meeting*
      And you decide to make this about women? Minorities talking about their feelings isn’t enough for you?

      • darkoneko
        darkoneko
        July 31, 2015 at 12:22 pm | #

        There, there.

      • Li
        Li
        July 31, 2015 at 3:09 pm | #

        Right, because… no queer people are women. Is that really your argument?

        • Spencer
          Spencer
          July 31, 2015 at 4:31 pm | #

          You are only allowed to talk about the social ills of one group at a time. It is the law.

          Failure to comply makes you a total pandering SJW.

          • Li
            Li
            July 31, 2015 at 4:52 pm | #

            I laughed, thank you <3

    • Blegh
      Blegh
      July 31, 2015 at 9:48 am | #

      Not every woman.
      I have to try to be seen by males, and i’m generally not successful. Being reminded that being stared at constantly is expected for most females feels pretty shitty for someone apparently not worth being seen at all.

      …And that’s why overgeneralizations are bad.

      • WolfLann
        WolfLann
        July 31, 2015 at 3:11 pm | #

        99.99999999999% of the time there is something beautiful and worth looking at in every women. Regardless of age, ethnicity or size. Clearly they must be missing something.

        Me personally I don’t like to “Stare” but like to steal a few good glances here and there. I feel like some kind of stalker if I end up staring for too long.

        • HMRC4EVR
          HMRC4EVR
          July 31, 2015 at 7:26 pm | #

          The best thing about not having a social life or any chance of ever getting one (esp involving a woman) is that after a while you just stop caring and don’t bother to look at them anymore.

          That way you’ll never get into trouble by someone thinking you’re looking at them.

      • Li
        Li
        July 31, 2015 at 4:59 pm | #

        I’ve heard this from other women, too; and laments that as they get older, they get cat called less. Even though being cat called is horrible, we’ve been trained to associate it with being attractive, and trained to associate that with having worth. So not being harassed on the streets makes us feel worthless.

        I will say that I get catcalled the most when I wear something big and pink. Guys holler as they drive by at speeds too fast to actually SEE me, it’s purely them reminding what they assume is a woman that we aren’t allowed to exist in public without commentary. (Like I have a big boxy pink coat that goes down to my knees. I wear it in fall and winter. I get honked and hollered at a LOT in that outfit by men who can’t see my body or face. It’s not actually a measure of attractiveness.)

        Also, I was catcalled the most often when I was a teenager. And by that I mean 14 or so. (Catcallers are the grossest people on the planet.) By the time I was 16 I had shaved off my hair and had taken to wearing military fatigues and big tshirts, so I was no longer read as female at a glance and no longer harassed for the rest of my tenure in high school.

  17. otusasio451
    otusasio451
    July 31, 2015 at 12:07 am | #

    Recent studies have suggested that Doasaurus wilcoxii and the smaller species Doasaurus saruyamensis competed for food. Whilst we do not know much of the diet of D. wilcoxii, extensive studies have shown that D. saruyamensis was omnivorous, with a diet consisting of the meat of small, oblong mammals, and supplemented with compacted, grain-based material present in various morphologies, including circular and in flake form. Some scientists have suggested that the digestion of said grain-based material was aided by the ingestion of a proteinous and fatty liquid, similar to the milk produced by mammals. However, as no reptile has been observed doing this in the pas, these studies are still being debated worldwide.

    • Someone
      Someone
      July 31, 2015 at 12:22 am | #

      interestingly with its slow reaction times and the fact that it was bad at sneaking. The wiicoxii was mainly a scavenger who would survive by gaining the trust and protection of the S. Walksaurus and the A. malsaurus. as well as others.

      • otusasio451
        otusasio451
        July 31, 2015 at 12:51 am | #

        Note by the editors of Willis Science Daily: The names S. walksaurus and A. malsaurus are newly coined synonyms for recently discovered species. These names are currently under review, as they do not conform with more traditional systems of naming reptiles in clade Dinosauria. Additionally, paleontologists are still attempting to determine whether the new species are a member of the genus Doasaurus, or are part of separate, more sturdy genera. We anticipate the final results of these reports to be finished soon, but will use the names S. walksaurus and A. malsaurus in the meantime, to minimize confusion.

  18. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    July 31, 2015 at 12:07 am | #

    There is only one way we can remove the awkwardness is for Dina to give Danny a brain-parasite err I mean dino-hat.

    • tim gueguen
      tim gueguen
      July 31, 2015 at 12:11 am | #

      A Jacquesian Worry Hat would be more appropriate to Danny I think.

      • darkoneko
        darkoneko
        July 31, 2015 at 12:24 pm | #

        Until you get blood on it and run screaming through the city.

  19. Bicycle Bill
    Bicycle Bill
    July 31, 2015 at 12:10 am | #

    Wasn’t Triceratops a vegetarian?

    • JessWitt
      JessWitt
      July 31, 2015 at 12:12 am | #

      This one’s more of a flexitarian.

    • -Sentinel-
      -Sentinel-
      July 31, 2015 at 12:13 am | #

      How do you know? You weren’t there!

      • Bagge
        Bagge
        July 31, 2015 at 1:07 am | #

        Yes I was.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      July 31, 2015 at 12:20 am | #

      Eating vegetarian animals kinda counts as a form of vegetarianism.

      • Agemegos
        Agemegos
        July 31, 2015 at 1:11 am | #

        They are what they eat, right? If I eat vegetarians….

        • Deanatay
          Deanatay
          July 31, 2015 at 9:11 am | #

          I’m a vegatarian. I only eat Vegans.

          • Bicycle Bill
            Bicycle Bill
            July 31, 2015 at 3:28 pm | #

            So if I’m a humanitarian…..

            • Darkoneko
              Darkoneko
              July 31, 2015 at 8:19 pm | #

              Yes.

            • Soundwave the Superior
              Soundwave the Superior
              July 31, 2015 at 8:24 pm | #

              I’m a herbivore. That’s why I only eat guys named Herb.

            • xKiv
              xKiv
              July 31, 2015 at 9:48 pm | #

              You eat humanins?

    • Gamaran Sepudomyn
      Gamaran Sepudomyn
      July 31, 2015 at 5:49 am | #

      Most herbivores are actually situational omnivores. And there’s an interesting article somewhere by Mark Witton about the shape of a Triceratops’ beaks being well suited to cutting up flesh.

  20. Em
    Em
    July 31, 2015 at 12:11 am | #

    COCK BLOCK

    Hello Dina are you going to tell Amber about this?

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      July 31, 2015 at 12:13 am | #

      Only if Amber asks I would guess.

      • newllend(henryvolt)
        newllend(henryvolt)
        July 31, 2015 at 12:31 am | #

        Amber: hello Dina how was your day ?

        Dina: oh I was stalking this one couple and I ended up in a gay pride meeting where I also saw your boyfriend and gay Ex-boyfriend there bonding over pizza, but how was your day?………why are you crying?

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          July 31, 2015 at 12:59 am | #

          That would be one of the most commented comics EVER!

        • electromagneticDestroyosaur
          electromagneticDestroyosaur
          July 31, 2015 at 2:40 am | #

          Considering Danny’s inability to obfuscate the truth, this could all be a means of driving a wedge between Danber without compromising Danny’s integrity (in this continuity at least)

        • Spencer
          Spencer
          July 31, 2015 at 7:26 am | #

          I don’t know if Amber’s going to react that violently to Danny’s bisexuality. She knows he’s huge on being faithful, and he likes girl parts.

          I could see Amber having a knee jerk “But he likes guys!” reaction, but I think since Ethan’s coming out she’s tried to educate herself on sexuality.

        • gkheyf
          gkheyf
          July 31, 2015 at 8:27 am | #

          i think she would just ask ‘how was your day?’ then politely wait for amber to stop crying to hear the answer. she may deftly dodge any furniture flung around in anger in the mean time.

          if amber falls asleep without answering, then dina will wait and ask again as she wakes up

          • Deanatay
            Deanatay
            July 31, 2015 at 11:21 am | #

            “I have read that leaking from the tear ducts indicates some extremity of emotion. I have told her that two close acquaintances are bonding over pizza – perhaps this is joy? I should study Amber more closely to learn more…”

            • gkheyf
              gkheyf
              July 31, 2015 at 11:55 am | #

              *staaaaaaaaaaaaa~re*

  21. Em
    Em
    July 31, 2015 at 12:13 am | #

    Also, Danny, RUDE. Don’t tell people your relationship is going to be awkward because of their sexuality, without giving context! You’re just making him feel bad! He has no idea that you want his dick.

    • SonicBlueRanger
      SonicBlueRanger
      July 31, 2015 at 8:52 am | #

      Ok. I understand where you’re coming from but what about Ethan’s face makes you think Danny’s comment made him feel bad?

  22. JessWitt
    JessWitt
    July 31, 2015 at 12:14 am | #

    Is there a female equivalent to, um, c*ck blocking that’s also food-related, a la clams or tacos?

    • TheKelliestKelly
      TheKelliestKelly
      July 31, 2015 at 12:15 am | #

      I’ve heard a few but the only one I remember off the top of my head is clam jamming

      • JessWitt
        JessWitt
        July 31, 2015 at 12:19 am | #

        Points for the rhyme, but sounds kinda violent (I might be overthinking it).

        • Bagge
          Bagge
          July 31, 2015 at 1:10 am | #

          “Cockles and mussels, alive, alive, oh”

      • chris73
        chris73
        July 31, 2015 at 12:22 am | #

        Now I’ve Black Betty stuck in my head

      • electromagneticDestroyosaur
        electromagneticDestroyosaur
        July 31, 2015 at 2:27 am | #

        Odd, “jamming” sounds like the opposite of the problem at hand.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      July 31, 2015 at 12:27 am | #

      twat swat
      clitoference
      muffin muzzle
      beaver dam

      • JessWitt
        JessWitt
        July 31, 2015 at 1:24 am | #

        Muffin muzzle sounds neat.

        • A Scientist
          A Scientist
          July 31, 2015 at 1:43 am | #

          It most certainly does not! Can you imagine being forced to wear a muzzle designed specifically to prevent you from eating muffins! They’re probably blueberry muffins, too, darn it!

      • TheOtherDibbler
        TheOtherDibbler
        July 31, 2015 at 1:44 am | #

        I like ‘beaver dam’ that’s clever.

    • Flohomie
      Flohomie
      July 31, 2015 at 2:49 am | #

      Taco stop-o?

    • Disloyal Subject
      Disloyal Subject
      July 31, 2015 at 4:38 am | #

      I recall seeing ‘box-blocked’ used a time or two.

    • Eggy
      Eggy
      July 31, 2015 at 12:21 pm | #

      Clam Jam

  23. Poop-em-Out
    Poop-em-Out
    July 31, 2015 at 12:15 am | #

    great use of snausage!

  24. dailybrad
    dailybrad
    July 31, 2015 at 12:16 am | #

    Okay, thank you for being honest, Ethan. Hope Danny can explore what his own questions and feelings are.

  25. Koms
    Koms
    July 31, 2015 at 12:21 am | #

    So many eyes in panel 4

    • gkheyf
      gkheyf
      July 31, 2015 at 8:40 am | #

      i know. so many. how are people focusing on the sausage when there are so many eeeyyyyeees!

      staring is one of dina’s greatest strengths, amiright?

  26. Professor Fate
    Professor Fate
    July 31, 2015 at 12:41 am | #

    Is this what is called a ‘sausage fest’?

    • detective boomwolf
      detective boomwolf
      July 31, 2015 at 12:42 am | #

      WHY DID I NOT THINK OF THAT?!?!

      • A4lbi
        A4lbi
        July 31, 2015 at 3:08 am | #

        That was actually my first thought.

        SPEED UP AND GET YOUR HEAD IN THE GAME,SON!

        • ninja_jesus
          ninja_jesus
          July 31, 2015 at 7:34 am | #

          Wait, so you’re saying if I want head, I have to get it “in the game”?

    • Deanatay
      Deanatay
      July 31, 2015 at 9:10 am | #

      It was, until Dina interrupted it. Dina’s taking the sausage pizza, so… sausage fest over.

  27. Mandy
    Mandy
    July 31, 2015 at 12:43 am | #

    My favorite kind of pizza: sausage and pineapple.

  28. detective boomwolf
    detective boomwolf
    July 31, 2015 at 12:45 am | #

    Man, everyone is comming up with good sausage related puns… I gotta come up with something…

    HAHA, SAUSAGE IS ANOTHER WORD FOR SHLONG!

    … Nailed it.

    • Rutee
      Rutee
      July 31, 2015 at 1:07 am | #

      Why can’t I Like your comment

      • nkh
        nkh
        July 31, 2015 at 6:00 pm | #

        +1

        Hey, remember when people said “+1” in comments? I feel like they stopped doing that a few years back, though.

  29. Karen Lynn
    Karen Lynn
    July 31, 2015 at 12:49 am | #

    Brace yourselves. Dick jokes are cumming.

    • Someone
      Someone
      July 31, 2015 at 1:28 am | #

      that joke was ballsy

      • Kryss LaBryn
        Kryss LaBryn
        July 31, 2015 at 1:41 am | #

        Really? It’s making me a bit teste.

        • electromagneticDestroyosaur
          electromagneticDestroyosaur
          July 31, 2015 at 2:29 am | #

          A true stroke of genius.

          • Flohomie
            Flohomie
            July 31, 2015 at 2:41 am | #

            These puns are teste-ing my patiences.

            • Dana
              Dana
              July 31, 2015 at 3:42 am | #

              My question with any pun war is if there will be a happy ending or if it will just peter out.

              • Spencer
                Spencer
                July 31, 2015 at 8:27 am | #

                What’s the deferens either way?

                • SonicBlueRanger
                  SonicBlueRanger
                  July 31, 2015 at 8:54 am | #

                  The important thing is not to cock it up.

                • Someone
                  Someone
                  July 31, 2015 at 11:34 am | #

                  some of these jokes kinda blow

                • Roborat
                  Roborat
                  July 31, 2015 at 3:21 pm | #

                  This whole pun cascade sucks.

                • Karen Lynn
                  Karen Lynn
                  July 31, 2015 at 5:32 pm | #

                  Even though some of the jokes are a bit thick, this went on longer than I expected.

                • Soundwave the Superior
                  Soundwave the Superior
                  July 31, 2015 at 8:28 pm | #

                  This chain is a bit schlong, wouldn’t you say?

                • Detective Boomwolf
                  Detective Boomwolf
                  August 1, 2015 at 12:00 am | #

                  THIS WHOLE CHAIN IS A PHALLASY!!!

  30. Jon P
    Jon P
    July 31, 2015 at 1:02 am | #

    We went from a sausage pizza-party to a sausage-pizza party!

  31. BenRG
    BenRG
    July 31, 2015 at 1:09 am | #

    By George, I think that she’s solved the mystery!

  32. Bagge
    Bagge
    July 31, 2015 at 1:12 am | #

    The triceratops strikes to feast on low-growth vegetation

    • gkheyf
      gkheyf
      July 31, 2015 at 8:30 am | #

      you mean low-hanging fruit puns?

      • Bagge
        Bagge
        July 31, 2015 at 9:31 am | #

        Ouch

        • gkheyf
          gkheyf
          July 31, 2015 at 11:57 am | #

          i genuinely thought that was the joke you were making. you see all of the sausage puns here? dina feasts upon them!

  33. FuryOfFirestorm
    FuryOfFirestorm
    July 31, 2015 at 1:20 am | #

    Sadly, the fish tacos remained untouched.

    • Palamdrone
      Palamdrone
      July 31, 2015 at 1:27 am | #

      Which is odd, considering Becky is constantly yelling about how much she loves them.

      • Kryss LaBryn
        Kryss LaBryn
        July 31, 2015 at 1:42 am | #

        Well, you can’t just run up to someone and start chowing down on their fish tacos. You have to persuade them to share them with you first.

        Becky’s still working on that bit.

      • Deanatay
        Deanatay
        July 31, 2015 at 9:08 am | #

        Becky’s not there, yet. Once she shows up, ALL of the fish tacos will be eaten.

  34. Idon'tcarenomore
    Idon'tcarenomore
    July 31, 2015 at 1:59 am | #

    Guess there is no problem ‘not seeing’ Dina, unless you get in between her and a sausage pizza.

    Damn, Dina is too cute.

    • darkoneko
      darkoneko
      July 31, 2015 at 12:27 pm | #

      Probably works for cereal, as well

  35. Idon'tcarenomore
    Idon'tcarenomore
    July 31, 2015 at 2:05 am | #

    And good grief and holey moley and all that stuff.
    Ethan said he’s Gay, right out loud, to another person.
    Danny is handling it, no pun intended, sort of.

    Now then, where is Joyce?

  36. ThatGuy
    ThatGuy
    July 31, 2015 at 2:38 am | #

    Priorities

  37. electromagneticDestroyosaur
    electromagneticDestroyosaur
    July 31, 2015 at 2:47 am | #

    Oh my gosh, THREE things:
    One, how is there only *one* sausage pizza for *this* event?
    Two, I never noticed just how short Dina is. I mean, Galasso towered over her, but he’s like seven feet tall. Danny isn’t too abnormally tall, but still an entire head and shoulders over Dina.
    Three, the adorkableness of Danthan is going to kill me via overdose of squee. Get me an IV of their Slipshine, *stat.* .. What do you mean, there isn’t one yet?

    • Disloyal Subject
      Disloyal Subject
      July 31, 2015 at 4:42 am | #

      It might be the only one left, or the only one open. I’ve known other events to have one of each type of pizza they have open with 2-4 closed & stacked up behind the open box to stay warm until they’re needed.

  38. Time Sage
    Time Sage
    July 31, 2015 at 3:40 am | #

    My mind mentally “corrected” Dina’s line in the last panel to “You are”. Should I be worried my subconscious is aware of character tics and adjusting for them when they’re not present?

  39. darkoneko
    darkoneko
    July 31, 2015 at 5:06 am | #

    “Dina is hungry and could not care less about your plumbing of choice.”

  40. TJ Pittsburgh
    TJ Pittsburgh
    July 31, 2015 at 5:41 am | #

    I feel like there are three things going on in the comments sections of late: 1) the Ethanny shippers can’t wait for Ethan and Danny to bang; 2) the Danny-haters pre-emptively hate Danny even more because they presume he will inevitably cheat on Amber; and 3) the possibility of an Ethan/Amber/Danny threeway relationship is discussed (or perhaps hoped for?).

    Isn’t that all a bit premature?

    I mean, just because Danny is bi doesn’t mean that he *ever* has to have sex with a guy, let alone Ethan. Bisexuals can be monogamous, too!

    And even though Danny is somewhat dense–probably on par with people in the real world–and a little whitebread/boring, loyalty to his romantic partner is his “thing.” I see no reason that he would be tempted to cheat on anyone, even if his confused feelings or attractions are reciprocated by Ethan.

    And finally, I see nothing to suggest that any of the three would be comfortable in a poly relationship. It’s not for everybody. I think Ethan would be uncomfortable with Amber being there, I doubt Danny could wrap his head around the concept, and I think it could break Amber. She’s not exactly stable, you now, much as I love her. And non-traditional relationships are especially difficult for people with mental/emotional problems. (Source: my personal life.) Besides that, Amber has previous emotional baggage with Ethan and sex, which makes a poly relationship even more potentially problematic.

    That being said, I think Amber would enjoy a threesome with Danny and another guy–which I suspect because of this strip–but not with Ethan, because of the aforementioned emotional baggage.

    (Unrelated: any idea when Sayid will show up? I’m in love with him already!)

    • darkoneko
      darkoneko
      July 31, 2015 at 12:29 pm | #

      They are mostly jesting and shipping. It shouldn’t be taken too seriously.

      • Spencer
        Spencer
        July 31, 2015 at 1:28 pm | #

        It’s still fairly annoying when people talk about how Danny needs to fuck Ethan right this second while ignoring his current relationship, or the demands that the two of them wander off together while they were drunk, or how people screech that Danny better not cheat like he’s ever given any indication that he would, but suddenly it’s possible because he’s into guys.

        (I’m not even touching the poly debate because I’ve said so much hurtful and offensive shit about polyamory that I’m just not allowing myself to do so anymore until I can better articulate myself.)

        Whether or not I’m being overly sensitive to perceived dismissal of Danny’s struggles and personal agency (and I am), it’s still cringe inducing to go through every time he’s on-page.

        • darkoneko
          darkoneko
          July 31, 2015 at 2:02 pm | #

          Lord I wish they would come off the constant dan-hating-assuming the worst, too. He’s like the new Becky.

          • darkoneko
            darkoneko
            July 31, 2015 at 2:04 pm | #

            Or as I often put it : “it’s called DUMBING of age for a reason”.

  41. Spencer
    Spencer
    July 31, 2015 at 5:42 am | #

    I was honestly expecting Danny to freak out. He’s taking this better than I initially thought he would.

    • Nono
      Nono
      July 31, 2015 at 7:46 am | #

      It’s easy to exceed expectations when they’re low enough.

      • Spencer
        Spencer
        July 31, 2015 at 8:07 am | #

        It’s not that. Last strip Danny was insisting that Ethan had to be straight. Here, he’s trying to make an effort to accept that it’s true and hastily ensure Ethan that he’s okay with it.

  42. Turbanous
    Turbanous
    July 31, 2015 at 5:43 am | #

    All hail Dina, breaker of awkward tension!!

    • gkheyf
      gkheyf
      July 31, 2015 at 8:37 am | #

      dina is known far and wide as the maker of awkward tension. she may do with it what she wishes, even break it

  43. Catty
    Catty
    July 31, 2015 at 5:55 am | #

    And that particular speech balloon is blocking our view of their own sau- (ahem) crotches.

    Coincidence? Is Willis trying to tell us something? Or does he want us to think that he is? Perhaps it means the universe will collapse on itself.

    Or perhaps we Dumbifans have a tendency to read too much into things because we’re so impatient for the next instalment.

    • Idonwanna
      Idonwanna
      July 31, 2015 at 1:41 pm | #

      I just assumed that the joke is meta. Dina’s looking directly at Danny in panel three and telling him that he’s blocking the sausage pizza — i.e., Danny is preventing the readers from getting the ONLY guy/guy relationship that could exist in this comic, at least right now.

  44. Guyferd
    Guyferd
    July 31, 2015 at 6:09 am | #

    Pedro says

    You never Sausage a place!

  45. Les
    Les
    July 31, 2015 at 6:28 am | #

    I read the title before the comic, so when I saw “Sausage,” I was thinking Walky might be blundering through with an insulting innuendo. Nope, just 2 awkward guys blocking Dina’s access to the pizza she wants…

    • Darkoneko
      Darkoneko
      July 31, 2015 at 6:44 am | #

      Heh, I took the reverse road : I saw the alt text and immediatly thought “I bet the page is named…” 😀

  46. Crumplepunch
    Crumplepunch
    July 31, 2015 at 8:42 am | #

    THE SAUSAGES ARE TOUCHING.

    CODE RED, I REPEAT, CODE RED.

  47. SonicBlueRanger
    SonicBlueRanger
    July 31, 2015 at 8:57 am | #

    Sausage Pizza. It’s Pizza topped with irony.

  48. Deanatay
    Deanatay
    July 31, 2015 at 9:01 am | #

    Dina! Stop interrupting their sausage fest!

    (Yeah, I know, the joke’s probably been done already.)

  49. Shawn L.
    Shawn L.
    July 31, 2015 at 9:16 am | #

    With panel 2, I thought we were segueing into a musical number from Avenue Q.

    • Someone
      Someone
      July 31, 2015 at 12:03 pm | #

      IF YOU WERE GAY
      THAT’D BE OKAY.
      I MEAN ‘CAUSE, HEY,
      I’D LIKE YOU ANYWAY.
      BECAUSE YOU SEE,
      IF IT WERE ME,
      I WOULD FEEL FREE
      TO SAY THAT I WAS GAY
      (BUT I’M NOT GAY.)

  50. Bagge
    Bagge
    July 31, 2015 at 9:39 am | #

    Well, Ethan and Danny, I think you have got what you need from the questioning meeting for now. Now I suggest you stroll down to the comic shop or wherever else you are comfortable and do some talking!

  51. JBento
    JBento
    July 31, 2015 at 9:42 am | #

    Shit, the Republicans are right: LGBT folk ARE terrible, sinful, hideous people. What kind of monster only puts out ONE sausage pizza?! YOU MONSTERS!!!

    (since tone doesn’t convey over written text, that was tongue-in-cheek)

    Also, I threw up a bit in my mouth writing “the Republicans are right,” let us hope Willis doesn’t give me a reason to do it again – heavens know the real republicans don’t…

    • darkoneko
      darkoneko
      July 31, 2015 at 12:31 pm | #

      Hey, blame Galasso for that one !

  52. Robert
    Robert
    July 31, 2015 at 10:02 am | #

    If Dan and Ethan are standing in front of the only sausage pizza, then that section of the lunch counter is a total sausage fest.

  53. darkoneko
    darkoneko
    July 31, 2015 at 12:36 pm | #

    Next page may give Danny a new person to try and talk about bisexuality with.

    Well, if it comes back to the question of why he’s here.
    One can hope.

  54. Edupoet81
    Edupoet81
    July 31, 2015 at 1:15 pm | #

    Interesting how Ethan isn’t asking why *Danny* is here. I suppose he’s respecting Danny’s right to disclose if and when he’s comfortable doing so. Still, Ethan does care for Amber, and now he’s just seen her current boyfriend at a questioning meeting. Under the circumstances, you’d think Ethan would have, well, questions.
    Now watch Amber come in, looking for advice on how to better help her friend Ethan, only to find Ethan and Danny bonding over their shared love of sausage.
    Would Amber flee from the room in tears straightaway, or would she stick around long enough to hear Danny’s explanation?
    It does seem that Amber and Ethan at least are still on speaking terms tomorrow. http://dumbingofage.tumblr.com/post/122339983209/itswalky-september-18-this-is-for-real-just-a
    Of course, Amber could be in the midst of a full-on psychotic break, and Ethan just realized that box contains what’s left of Danny.
    Or on a less horrifying note, maybe Amber just told Ethan that she just wrote a super-hot fanfic about Ethan and Danny getting it on while she watches, and Ethan won’t be allowed to read it — ever.

    • Edupoet81
      Edupoet81
      July 31, 2015 at 1:17 pm | #

      And by tomorrow, I mean tomorrow in comic-time. Not sure how clear that was.

    • Spencer
      Spencer
      July 31, 2015 at 1:19 pm | #

      I’m guessing that Walky showing up for some free gay pizza, and Danny claiming that he has no idea where he is, gave him the impression that Danny is also just here for the food.

  55. Edupoet81
    Edupoet81
    July 31, 2015 at 1:40 pm | #

    If Danny were more of a smooth operator, he *could* have played it off like that. However, his awkward sputtering and claim that he was leaving to look at chicks indicates that he’s (unsuccessfully) hiding something.

    • Edupoet81
      Edupoet81
      July 31, 2015 at 1:42 pm | #

      That was supposed to be a reply to Spencer, regarding the assumption that Danny is there for the free food, but I clicked “post comment” instead of reply, because I’m dumb.

    • Spencer
      Spencer
      July 31, 2015 at 1:48 pm | #

      Sure, but to Ethan, Danny is straight as an arrow, and I’m going to make a huge assumption and say that Ethan wants Danny to be straight so that Amber doesn’t lose another boyfriend. Plus, right now he’s more concerned with whether Danny’s okay with him being gay.

      • darkoneko
        darkoneko
        July 31, 2015 at 1:58 pm | #

        It’s nice he could get down from his closet-induced panic thanks to their meeting, I feel.

        • Spencer
          Spencer
          July 31, 2015 at 3:05 pm | #

          Danny awkwardness aside, I imagine it’s comforting to Ethan hearing from a friend that they’re okay with his sexuality. He seems to mellow out somewhat from Panel 3 and on.

          • TJ Pittsburgh
            TJ Pittsburgh
            July 31, 2015 at 5:06 pm | #

            Has there been anyone (except his parents, and I’ll grant that that is a big “except”) who hasn’t been supportive? Even Joyce has come around and has been super supportive!

          • TJ Pittsburgh
            TJ Pittsburgh
            July 31, 2015 at 5:08 pm | #

            Since he’s been to college, I mean. I imagine that high school kids are still merciless when it comes to things like this . . .

            • Spencer
              Spencer
              July 31, 2015 at 6:43 pm | #

              The only people who’ve acted on their knowledge have been Walky, Joyce and Danny, while Dorothy knows but has yet to say anything.

              It’s not just a matter of “Okay I’m cool with it!” because Ethan has the lingering fear that being gay will change how people will see him. If Dorothy were to walk up to him and talk about how totes supportive she’s going to be, he’d probably be a bit annoyed that he’s being defined as “Gay Ethan” again.

              His relationship with Danny has so far gone smoothly, and he’s been able to go full on nerd like he hasn’t been able to lately. Walky, meanwhile, undermines his sexuality by making Ethan’s declaration about how is super smart he is for sussing him out.

              • Kamino Neko
                Kamino Neko
                July 31, 2015 at 7:20 pm | #

                Yes, because ‘that makes things awkward’ is totally supportive and part of a good, normal relationship.

                • Spencer
                  Spencer
                  July 31, 2015 at 7:28 pm | #

                  If Danny were Ethan’s straight friend reacting that way, then sure, it’d be awful. But we know that Danny is reacting this way because he doesn’t know how to deal his own attraction. It “makes things awkward” because now it’s not just a completely impossible fantasy anymore. Plus, I think his insistence that Ethan being gay is okay is significant when trying to determine Danny’s feelings.

                  I understand why someone would interpret Danny’s reaction negatively, because “You being gay makes things awkward” is something bandied by straight dudes when their friends come out to them, but I do feel that there’s a different context to Danny saying it then if it were Walky or Jacob.

  56. hack
    hack
    July 31, 2015 at 1:50 pm | #

    dina like sausage pizza and there’s nothing wrong with that.

  57. Willoughby Chase
    Willoughby Chase
    July 31, 2015 at 6:22 pm | #

    An extended game of hunt the sausage?

  58. Tenn
    Tenn
    July 31, 2015 at 7:15 pm | #

    Badum-tish.

    That’s it, folks. The end of Dumbing of Age. Goodness, it’s almost been five years! Time sure flies.

    Well, I don’t know about you, but I’m looking forward to the spin-off strip, “Orgies Solve Everything”.

    • Darkoneko
      Darkoneko
      July 31, 2015 at 8:15 pm | #

      Orgies of Age ?

  59. Skizz
    Skizz
    July 31, 2015 at 7:53 pm | #

    Man,mthose guys sure ordered a load of pizza.

    • Darkoneko
      Darkoneko
      July 31, 2015 at 8:14 pm | #

      They didn’t ; probably left that logistic for Galasso to bring whatever he wanted.

  60. Aaron Bourque
    Aaron Bourque
    July 31, 2015 at 7:59 pm | #

    Only one sausage pizza at the gay meeting thing?

    Is that irony?

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      July 31, 2015 at 8:17 pm | #

      No, that is just poor catering, if you are going to have pizzas, you should have plenty of supreme and meat-lovers, some Hawaiian and margarita pizzas and depending on how many vegetarian/vegans you believe are going to show up, at least one pizza that they can enjoy too.

      • Dana
        Dana
        July 31, 2015 at 10:34 pm | #

        Plain cheese isn’t just good for veggies though. Also good for us picky omnivores.

  61. Chrissy
    Chrissy
    July 31, 2015 at 10:42 pm | #

    Aw, I like Danny with sclera!

  62. Sam
    Sam
    July 31, 2015 at 10:47 pm | #

    And Sarah is still sitting in the cafeteria waiting for the intel. Agent Dina has become distracted by all the free food.

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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
I may have to pin this
damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatarDavid M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 5d
btw if you're one of those rando bluesky weirdos who doesn't know me but sees me in the wild being sarcastic and don't know i'm being sarcastic because you haven't taken like 30 seconds to, like, maybe look at my user profile or something, keep walking, you're not going to score internet points here
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damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
#relatable
header image - a man in a hospital gown says
media.tenor.com
a man in a hospital gown says " stop pooping " to another man
ALT: a man in a hospital gown says " stop pooping " to another man
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osmote.net's user avatar
OSMOTE @osmote.net ⋅ 2d
Screenshot of Jonathan Frakes on the set of Beyond Belief
brendelbored.bsky.social's user avatarBrendel @brendelbored.bsky.social ⋅ 1y
Politico: Ever been slapped by breasts?
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joshuajfriedman.com's user avatar
Joshua J. Friedman @joshuajfriedman.com ⋅ 3d
Here's an entertaining cite at the bottom of the first page
The problems with this prosecution are legion, but most immediately, the
government cannot prosecute Judge Dugan because she is entitled to judicial immunity for her official acts. Immunity is not a defense to the prosecution to be determined later by a jury or court; it is an absolute bar to the prosecution at the outset. See Trump v. United States,
603 U.S. 593, 630 (2024).
joshgerstein.bsky.social's user avatarJosh Gerstein @joshgerstein.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
JUST IN: Milwaukee Judge Hannah Dugan moves to dismiss federal criminal case against her for allegedly helping immigrant hide from ICE. Her lawyers say she's protected by official acts & judicial immunity and 10th Amendment. Doc: storage.courtlistener.com/recap/gov.us...
storage.courtlistener.com

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damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
Dumbing of Age: "Up, continued" www.dumbingofage.com/2025/comic/b... #webcomic #webcomics
www.dumbingofage.com
Up, continued
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theonion.com's user avatar
The Onion @theonion.com ⋅ 3d
Where did Hollywood go so wrong? I thought movies were supposed to be an escape from reality, a chance to put your worries aside and not have to think about any underlying ideas or concepts. Well, not anymore. theonion.com/you-can...
header image - You Can’t Even Watch A Movie Anymore Without Seeing Some Theme Explored
theonion.com
You Can’t Even Watch A Movie Anymore Without Seeing Some Theme Explored
I’ve loved movies ever since I was a little kid. Just stepping into that dark theater, with the smell of fresh popcorn, was like being transported to a whole other world. It used to be so magical. But now I’m thinking about boycotting movies altogether. Why? Because I can’t seem to watch one anymore without […]
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damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
GOTTEM
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parsnip.bsky.social's user avatar
geoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
the 90s were a wild time. if i told you how many magazines there were you wouldnt even believe me
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aubreygilleran.bsky.social's user avatar
Aubrey Gilleran @aubreygilleran.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
It's not a new argument, of course, but Chesterton dismissed it effectively in 1908. "You will hear everlastingly... this argument that the rich man cannot be bribed. The fact is, of course, that the rich man is bribed; he has been bribed already. That is why he is a rich man."
atrupar.com's user avatarAaron Rupar @atrupar.com ⋅ 3d
Hawley dismisses Trump lining his pockets with his memecoin: "Listen, I think nobody believes that Donald Trump can be bought. I mean, what does Donald Trump need more money for?"
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catacalypto.bsky.social's user avatar
Cat Manning @catacalypto.bsky.social ⋅ 12d
1984 calendar meme reading 1529, the year of the first Ottoman siege of Vienna
spavel.bsky.social's user avatarPavel🐀 @spavel.bsky.social ⋅ 12d
Who can forget the Swiss-Austrian Union, or its famous capital - Istanbul.
AI generated ad by a company called Travello showing the 10 most visited cities in Europe, except the cities are hilariously poorly placed. London is in Wales, Paris is in Ireland, Rome is in France, Rom (yes like Rome but without an E) is in Spain, Barcelona is in Morocco, Prague is in Germany, Vienna is in Italy, Istanbul is in Austria, Milan is in Libya, and Antalya is correctly shown as in Turkey but is in the wrong place. Also a few of the borders like Switzerland and Austria or Hungary and Slovenia are missing.
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