Joe’s new nickname is “Little Dick Monster”. It is decided.
I’m not so sure he will still like it as much if everyone started to refer to him as the LITTLE Dick Monster.
Drop the “monster”, just call him “Little Dick.”
What about little Joe?
wait…is He little or is…”HE” little???
Well, we all know Joe’s big. Little Joe (thank God) hasn’t shown up in a strip.
Also, she’s really pushing for those votes, huh?
“Dickmonster.” The lack of space is important.
Like the Cookiemonster?
yes. a cookiemonster of dicks.
Om nom nom nom nom.
I wonder if THAT was on the video.
This conversation became incredibly awkward for Joe as soon as Plasma brought up CookieMonster. Cool. I mean, how many times does a Sesame Street character lead to a sex tape reference?
I don’t know why exactly, but this comment warms my black heart.
I believe you mean cockmonster
As long as no one declares dicks a ‘sometimes food’ everything should be alright.
@Jimmy: Does that include Spotted Dick?
Is it irony that in a comic strip with a person forgiving little dickmonsters for violating nether regions and upholding family values, a commenter has the gravatar of said person and replies “Om nom nom nom nom” to “a cookiemonster of dicks.”? Or is there a better word?
All that came to mind was… No space for the dickmonster… suddenly goes from insult to freaky. Much approved!
She forgives all the nether defiling little dickmonsters!
I’m dead serious about that, Willis. I’d buy “Vote DeSanto!” Badges.
Thus it is spoken. So let it be done.
Accordingly, all references to being “Joe’d” shall henceforth be changed to being “little dickmonstered”.
“So does the internet!”
teh intarwebz knows ALL
I’m going to guess the ticklish spot is in her pants, by the way.
I bet it’s her nethers.
not anymore. they’re probably numb thanks to the nether-defiling little dickmonster.
So….her knee pits, then?
I’m secretly checking this comic while waiting for a meeting to start and the “So does the internet” line almost made me burst out laughing.
THE INTERNET KNOWS ALL!
It sees you when you’re sleeping. It knows when you’re awake. It knows when you’ve been bad or good, so be good or GTFO.
“4chan is coming TO TOWN!”
And there goes the neighborhood!
Family Values my arse.
Well its more family values than Warren Jeffs and the FLSD have. Ha!
Hey now, the FLSD has wincest, the epitome of family values.
Looks like ending up on the internet is a family curse.
I’m going to guess thar Roz’s plan (if she had one) didn’t come together.
I’m sure there was coming somwhere down the line!
Haha, nethers, I’m so going to start saying that in everyday conversation.
You mean conversation like “Mike did your mum in her nethers and stuck a nickel up there.”
Woah, that is NOT cool. Aside from sounding down right painful, it makes me think of arcade games. Very disturbing arcade games.
Also the idea of someone’s mother having a ‘joystick’ doesn’t help either.
(The internet corrupts all)
Your mom is a complete slot machine.
I was thinking of completely replacing the word “never” with nether, it would go mostly unnoticed when spoken, but when typed it may raise a eyebrows..
So now we know why Roz is so intense. Also, using tickling as a threat proves that Robin will never be mature in any universe.
I like Roz.
Doesn’t defiling suggest that Robin thinks that Roz was a virgin beforehand?
Or it could mean the Robin just thinks Roz should have higher standards and Joe was beneath her.
How can Joe possibly be beneath her? If anyone likes to be on top, it’s Joe!
Beneath her, on top of her, behind her…
pERFECT gRAV rESPONSE
Joe was beneath her…
e heh…e heh heh heh heh heh…
Not necessarily. It’s like Joyce’s analogy about the flower petals: “sinning” once is bad, but not as bad as repeating it.
Holy crap, do I feel weird explaining that with a Joe gravitar.
Just because Joe understands does not mean Joe approves.
Evil witch! Take two antibiotics and call me in the morning. If your still crazy then we will have to lobotmize.
Evolving into FANSERVICE!
I almost feel like the Robin/Joe exchange should’ve been accompanied by a brofist.
Indeed. And that would be just the type of front page picture to help her campaign.
CONGRESSWOMAN FORGIVES DICKMONSTER!
Now thoses are what I call headlines.
Okay three strips and I got to say, this Robin kind of dick monster herself, albiet in a different way. Then again, we’re only three strips in.
I am half expecting for Robin’s skin to peel off revealing Sarah Palin inside.
I was expecting *shudder* Ayn Rand.
What! No one expects Ayn Rand!
So Ayn Rand is the Spanish Inquisition?
No, the Russian Inquisition, they are worse.
NOBODY EXPECTS THE DICTATORSHIP OF THE PROLETARIAT
(wait that’s Marx, crap)
NOBODY EXPECTS STUPID TRAIN METAPHORS also I haven’t read Atlas Shrugged
“I love the smell sight of weird comment tangents in the morning.”
That would be scarier as she has been dead for about 30 years.
Roting in hell I might add.
Still several levels above Marx in the ice, though.
No they’re stuck in the same room.
It’s Hell what more do you need.
Sartre sits in the corner, grinning like an idiot.
Apparently, ignorance is bliss. Living in a pseudo-free market has this effect I presume.
I hate Walkyverse! Roz and enjoy(mostly) Robin, and I dislike DoA Robin and love Roz. Have to wonder if Willis did that intentionally.
When in doubt, just cry out the three words people have been saying for years:
“DAMN YOU, WILLIS!!!”
Joe is totally my favourite.
(Note: My favourite changes from panel to panel)
While this Robin is definitely more mature than her original incarnation, it’s obvious from the tickle comment that she will never lose a little childish streak.
Well, if she was a totally serious and mature character, she wouldn’t be Robin.
I… I think I love DOA Roz. Not expected!
I know, right?! This IS an alternate universe!
It’s actually kind of fascinating how the relationship is so different than Shortpacked. There, Robin always feels that her sister is intruding on her life and is the one more likely to yell and insult, while it’s reversed here.
What I like is how Robin is just as shallow and self-absorbed, but in a totally different way for a slightly different reason.
And nowhere near as likeable when being shallow and self-absorbed, either :\
Man, if Sarah Palin actually had the STEEL BALLS to call Levi Johnston a “little dickmonster” in public, I could almost maybe see myself vote for her!
Especially if she called him “the little dickmonster who defiled my daughter’s nethers”!
Them fists are stranglin’ fists!
Stranglin’ fists of rage.
They thirst for Robin’s neck.
Sounds like a weird fetish to me.
That’s Rule 36 in a nutshell.
Easy there, Roz. You’re intruding on your professor’s Happy Glow Time with her crush object. That’s going to impact your grade if you’re not careful.
Joe already impacted her grade. With his penis.
And it wasn’t even for a nickel.
But it was in her faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaace. (does that make it a faaaaaaaaaaaaacial?)
i doubt it. we all know what happens when two women get into a tickle fight.
I actually have some links I could post, but NSFW.
They wet themselves laughing!?!
I’m not usually a DoA fan, but “Forgiveness accepted” made me laugh out loud.
Sometimes a politician has to know when to represent her constituents’ views. Like George Wallace!
Roz was the one who made the video for her own political/societal motivations first, using (and endangering) her sister’s career for notoriety. They’re both pretty terrible.
Yeah, though I have to admit I’m disliking Roz a little more. But that’s really only because I have some residual bias from the Walkyverse Roz.
Whatchu gonna do, Roz? Punch her in the FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACE?
with her femurs.
…Vote DeSanto! She CAN make you!
Vote DeSanto! She knows your tickle spots!
I love the idea of Robin having her own political machine. I hope you can expand on this.
You know, yesterday I was thinking that, were I assisting Robin (assuming Robin is a Republican, here), I would have her try to paint Roz as some flaky campus liberal, and the very best way to do this would be, oh, to drop by visiting Roz in a gender studies class (screams ‘liberal’) and then tweak Roz into getting all pissy in hopes that she causes a scene at the actual campaign rally later that night.
If so, all is going according to plan, and Robin is probably secretly praying that Roz manages to scrape up an actual crowd of campus radicals at whom she can stoically confront in front of the cameras. Do you know how much she’d have to spend in advertising to buy that kind of credibility?
I’m going to go out on a limb here and assume the value is significantly higher than $9000. Could be wrong about that, though.
Roz IS a flaky campus liberal, she is doing all this not for some political ideal but for an innerfight with her sister. She is not limiting to advertise “free love” but going to the extreme to confront her sister in a political arena (she did know the thing was going to blow when she made the video)
You, I, and Robin all know Roz is a flaky campus liberal, but in terms of neutralizing the controversy her little sister ginned up, Robin needs to demonstrate this to the electorate.
Also, how is it that whatever program assigns Gravatars somehow manages to pick one that is inappropriate to whatever comment is being made? Does “AI” stand for Artificial Irony?
I love how Roz is the little sister. It is a very well-thought-out mechanic.
(heh you know what else is a very well thought out mechanic)
Sure she has the freedom to do what she did, but in that same respect, people have the right to criticize her for it. Public officials and celebrities deal with it constantly whether it be an inappropriate comment or an affair or things of that nature. It isn’t illegal, but that doesn’t mean there won’t be consequences. Right or wrong, it’s life.
Roz doesn’t like the way life is – that appears to be her point. She hung the bait out, and when Sis took it, the crime against her was committed.
Though I think criticizing her would have gone over a little better than forgiving her. Forgiveness is just so patronizing.
The crime against Roz, I meant. Pronouns…
I agree in principle, but there’s not much talk from her about a solution to the problem (maybe that will come later). However, as long as people have opinions, this won’t ever go away. Just my opinion anyway
It’s theoretically possible that one day we’ll collectively as a society get over being bothered by other people’s sexual behavior, the way many of us have gotten over being bothered by other people’s interracial romances. There is no sign of this happening in the forseeable future, admittedly, but that’s no reason why Roz shouldn’t see it as an ideal to be pursued – not the least by her own sister.
Yeah I read that propaganda about “loving the children” too. But I say, if you need to have sex then sell It and buy It, the whole love thing does not apply in the cases when you just want a bang.
We will be comfortable with other people’s sexual behaviors when everyone stops publicizing their sexual behaviors.
The solution is to just stop talking about it:
How much freedom she really has to do what she did is debatable. The funny thing about freedom is that it’s granted via social contract, and only those willing to forgo society have truly unfettered freedom as the social consequences of their actions are made moot by removing themselves absolutely from society.
For the rest of us, our freedom is tempered on how it’s consequences affect those around us (unless one is a complete sociopath), and the magnitude of such consequences depends on how well known one is, As an example, most of the world wouldn’t bat an eyelash over Paris Hilton if she wasn’t from the family she is and by the same token no one would give a nickle either way over Roz’s video exploits is her sister weren’t in congress.
Assuming she made the vid specifically to tweak her sister’s nose or to make a statement about sexual freedom by leapfrogging off her sister’s public figure status, she, in my mind anyway, is the one who has denigrated herself here and it paints her in as bad a light as Robin’s response does her.
Still wondering who said “So does the internet!”
…I hope it was Walky!
I’m thinking it was Joyce!
…okay, possibly not.
I’m guessing it was Joe
I actually don’t think so – that reads as a dig against Roz’s exhibitionism in posting the video, and Joe wouldn’t be inclined to insult any aspect of what Roz has done.
Joe is machist, despict the woman body as an empty object that can be made to do pointless jokes is in his nature. He did it for the Lulz, as he honestly doesnt care about Roz
I didn’t read it as an insult. It sounded like a gloating frat boy type who just high fived his mates offscreen.
But if it was an insult, it was totally Mike who said it.
I’m going with,it was the entire class.
I’m personally assuming Dean McHenry, who probably feels that the video reflects badly on his school.
Oh, hellz yeah! Sex education advocate, feminist, amateur porn star, opponent of fake political rallying. Roz is so boss, Roz is Da Boss.
I mean obviously Robin is meant to be the enemy here, but Roz is just throwing a tantrum. She sounds like she’s a five year old fighting with her parents about bedtime. It’s the same argument.
I so don’t agree. Roz’s life is her own, fuck what some conservative hillbilies think.
Firstly, DoA Roz is quite awesome.
Secondly, if politicians in real life talked like Robin does … I’d probably watch the news more often.
oh man, “so does the internet” totally needs to be a meme now!
Now, wait a minute. In the original continuity, Robin only ran for congress because she was sugar high as all hell. But since she doesn’t have superpowers in this ‘verse, sweets presumably don’t have as insane an effect on her.
So was it still because of high highness, or did she actually *want* to go into politics in this universe?
Maybe she’s an attention whore?
There are some pretty weird and unexpected paths to politics in real life. People have been elected who were basically asked to fill a spot on the ballot – there was a lot of that in the recent Canadian elections; the NDP put in some space-fillers in Quebec and was probably as surprised as anyone to have them actually elected. Alvin Greene was an unemployed guy who collected the bare minimum of signatures and won the Democratic primary for Senator in SC because of voter dissatisfaction. I vaguely recall some story about the Republican Party once placing a want-ad for a candidate (I think a Congressional rep, too!).
So despite the lack of superpowers, there’s no reason Robin can’t have gotten elected due to some weird stuff happening. I personally favor the want-ad approach (“It was either retail or Washington”) because I expect that sort of odd ad-hoc stuff from Robin.
xD I love that… sounds perfectly like something she would do too. Although I don’t think it would be ‘retail or Washington’ I think it would be more like; “It was retail or Washington, and the retail place refused to hire me.”
Yeah, DoA Robin has pretty much the same personality as Walkyverse Robin. Give that woman some Cadbury cereal!
The internet knows everything!
(Although Google didn’t come up with any satisfying results to “Roz DeSanto ticklish areas”, nor to “Robin DeSanto pubic hair”, but that’s probably just because I didn’t search had enough.)
Leslie’s smile has faded.
No no, Roz’s shouting just broke her out of her fantasy for a moment. It’ll be back momentarily.
Roz has a special gift for always annoying me I think. All I can see here is she joes random people to try and prove a point that she is free to do as she wishes.
But…she is free to do what she wishes. (And who she wishes, as well.)
So why bothering to prove the point then? For me is an attention whore and a rebellious girl, mostly because of her sister (A politician in the family? thats not good…)
Well, it looks like this Roz is at least as self-centered as the Shortpacked! Roz, but with added misguided self-righteousness! Unsympathic character successfully created!
Mi politic stand is that if kids are not responsable enough they shouldnt have sex (a.k.a Responsable Fun). But when my Ethics teacher asked me how I would prevent they from having sex I said “first ofend then castration, there would be no secon offence”, yeah she reacted the same as you.
Other problem was my definition of “responsable enough”=Not Stupid. They acused me of nazi eugenics. But I meant good!
After this we discover that this is all a big misunderstanding and no one on campus actually knows what sex is. The video is mostly just Joe tickling Roz for two hours. Despite their behavior at many times almost resembling known fetishes at no point during the video does any form of sexuality occur. Ten minutes of it is just the two of them puzzling a pair of dildos before engaging in a impromptu mock-sword fight.
An investigation is put forth to discover how this video was able to successfully pull the wool over the eyes of the entire student body, the news media, and the voters of a congressional district. Ultimately it’s Leslie who compiles all the data into a thesis that somehow fixes all of the country’s problems. History is made.
When does Leslie gets to have love time with Robin then if she is making the thesis!?
Robin capitalizes on this to earn herself presidency with Leslie as the first lady. They also make a video together that goes to great lengths to correct misconceptions regarding sex. It will become the Kama Sutra of the modern world.
“Candidate Desanto, how do you feel about people saying that you’re lesbianism goes against the family values that you promised the nation?”
Robin: Now now, I know you guys all are up in arms about Leslie here, but I’m not going to be the one to break tradition! It’s the ‘First Lady’ not the ‘First Gentleman’!
Everyone nods in agreement.
See… the problem with her logic is that once she put it on the internet for the world to see… it kind of became her sister’s business. And the world’s for that matter.
Like Joe said, now the internet knows where she’s ticklish. She just asked for her sex like to be critiqued. Why is the girl so surprised?
She made it public, that doesn’t mean she expected it to go viral. Maybe it was only meant for her facebook friends to see. Specifically I recall a powerpoint presentation made by a girl comparing all of her sexual partners on campus… it was only meant for friends until someone started emailing it to everyone and soon it was on the evening news.
HOW IS THIS NEWS?
Yeah, see, now I’m not liking this universe’s Robin. She’s basically just the run of the mill politician. Roz is totally in the right at the moment. Its pretty annoying that even DoA Robin just makes anything she’s involved in about her self.
When I read panel 4, I couldn’t help but think of this video.
Seriously, commenters of DoA? Seriously?
Why are so many of the comments slut-shaming Roz, or at least implying that she did something wrong?
I totally agree with what she says in the fourth panel! Her body is her own! She can do what she likes! She can have sex with everyone or no one at all; she can tattoo “Aladdin” on her forehead if she wants to and she can shave off her eyebrows and it would be nobody else’s business!
At least not all comments were bad; I completely agree with the person who said we are not yet in the century when people do not care about others’ sexual antics.
I agree with you that it’s Roz’s business, but I disagree with the people that are saying that Robin’s trying to make it her business.
If you pay attention, she’s basically just saying she forgives Joe and Roz for the cameras, and probably doesn’t honestly care what her little sister does. But she’s expected to do something to “clean up her house” (so to speak) by her constituents, so she’s putting in a passable attempt at screentime so she can get out of this as quickly as possible, so she can get back to her attempt to get ‘Cadbury Cereal’ off the controlled substance list.
What Robin should be doing is explaining that her house doesn’t need cleaning.
She certainly can. She even may.
This does not mean that she should.
Now people who approve of Joe’s actions while disapproving of Roz’s very similar actions? Or vice versa? That’s quite unfair.
But people have just as much right to say they’re both wrong as you do to say they’re both right.
(Actually, she probably does care, but at the same time she doesn’t because, y’know, it’s Robin).
Oh gee, thank you for forgiving us for hurting absolutely no one, I know how much it hurts you when we do that.
Roz is def my fave character so far omg she’s basically me
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