Dumbing of Age Book Twelve

Dumbing of Age

A college webcomic by David Willis
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gadzooks, we have discovered the rare and elusive Happy Billie
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July 8, 2026

Broker

by David M Willis on May 2, 2013 at 12:01 am
  • 03 - Answers in Hennessy
└ Tags: agatha, jennifer

Discussion (97) ¬

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  1. Jen Aside
    Jen Aside
    May 2, 2013 at 12:49 am | #

    All that Snapple works wonders!

    As do drop-kicks for spats, I’m sure.

    • Resne
      Resne
      May 2, 2013 at 1:08 am | #

      Dem spats.

    • Venapax
      Venapax
      May 2, 2013 at 1:59 am | #

      I’m a little concerned that Agatha thinks Billie is qualified to help because she can drop-kick things

      • Ancestral Hamster
        Ancestral Hamster
        May 2, 2013 at 2:19 am | #

        Perhaps Agatha wants Billie to kick some sense into them!

        • Yarrr
          Yarrr
          May 2, 2013 at 2:26 am | #

          Clearly she thinks Billie is an RPG protagonist – that would explain a lot – and can solve everything as long as there’s XP and loot at the end of it.

          • Ancestral Hamster
            Ancestral Hamster
            May 2, 2013 at 3:39 am | #

            Okay, I’ll write up the encounter.

            Room 702: 1 Grace, HP9, THACO 19, 1 Mandy HP 11, THACO 19. Treasure: 1 composition book, 2 three-ring binders, 24 copper pieces.

            • Manly Bowler
              Manly Bowler
              May 2, 2013 at 3:43 am | #

              What, only 20 HP between the both of them? Billie will be happy if she gets XP at all.
              She should try and raid The Dungeon of Sal. Much harder but there’s a kickass bicycle as loot.

              • Ancestral Hamster
                Ancestral Hamster
                May 2, 2013 at 3:52 am | #

                Well, Freshmen are only 2 hit die monsters, so a dorm full of them is basically a starting dungeon. Billie needs some easy encounters to level up first before taking on the Dungeon of Sal. Dungeon of Sal = Tomb of Horrors for difficulty!

                Although Sal is hella sexier than any lich! 😀

                • Cybersnark
                  Cybersnark
                  May 2, 2013 at 7:48 am | #

                  . . . Or a starting dungeon is basically a dorm full of freshmen.

                  Mind: blown.

                • Aizat
                  Aizat
                  May 2, 2013 at 9:47 am | #

                  Depends on the freshmen stats though. Some freshmen starts with a hig Strength and Constitution score from their last class.

                • Aizat
                  Aizat
                  May 2, 2013 at 9:49 am | #

                  What’s the Dungeonland equivalent?

                • Boom
                  Boom
                  May 2, 2013 at 12:16 pm | #

                  And then the Forever DM made a college-based campaign.

                • Ancestral Hamster
                  Ancestral Hamster
                  May 2, 2013 at 3:35 pm | #

                  @Aizat: Not having played Dungeonland, I couldn’t tell you. Your mention of it is the first I’ve heard of it. However, having looked it up, it’s the sort of game I’d like so I’ll check it out further and maybe I’ll buy it. Thanks!

                • Lord Geovanni
                  Lord Geovanni
                  March 30, 2014 at 10:52 pm | #

                  Billie can handle freshmen because she lives in the dungeon of sal

              • ironballs16
                ironballs16
                October 17, 2013 at 9:35 am | #

                Ah, but she has to settle it through non-violent means! She’d fail the quest if one of them started bleeding profusely.

            • Scott
              Scott
              May 2, 2013 at 10:34 pm | #

              Oh, are we using THACO? I didn’t realize DoA took place in 1987.

          • Aizat
            Aizat
            May 2, 2013 at 9:50 am | #

            So, Billie’s a Monk?

      • JA
        JA
        May 2, 2013 at 11:27 pm | #

        Being able to dropkick things should be a requirement for being an RA.

  2. Kiggy
    Kiggy
    May 2, 2013 at 12:49 am | #

    Oh Yeah :3

    • Aizat
      Aizat
      May 2, 2013 at 1:02 am | #

      Or as the late Macho Man Randy Savage would’ve said it: “OOOOOOOH YEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!! DIG IT!”

  3. Evvy
    Evvy
    May 2, 2013 at 12:49 am | #

    Goddammit Billie, don’t go the vengeful route!

  4. Aizat
    Aizat
    May 2, 2013 at 12:49 am | #

    Little did Billie know, RUTHLESS saw everything through the peephole.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      May 2, 2013 at 12:54 am | #

      With her hand down her pants.

      • Skull025
        Skull025
        May 2, 2013 at 12:57 am | #

        Yeah, trying to untwist your panties after watching your job get overshadowed by a cheerleader is a right mess to sort out.

  5. Kernanator
    Kernanator
    May 2, 2013 at 12:50 am | #

    Clearly the answer is to get them both drunk on cognac.

    • Rognik
      Rognik
      May 2, 2013 at 1:08 am | #

      Or spike them with ipecac.

  6. Robbie C
    Robbie C
    May 2, 2013 at 12:50 am | #

    How tall is Agatha?

    • Aizat
      Aizat
      May 2, 2013 at 12:55 am | #

      Tall enough, I’d say.

    • Robbie C
      Robbie C
      May 2, 2013 at 12:55 am | #

      I don’t know what state I was in when I asked this. She just looks kind of tall.

    • begbert2
      begbert2
      May 2, 2013 at 10:36 am | #

      She’s probably only around 5’7″; Willis’s females tend to run a little on the short side.

      • David
        David M Willis
        May 2, 2013 at 11:56 am | #

        Billie’s 5’7″. Agatha’s probably about 5’11”.

        • begbert2
          begbert2
          May 2, 2013 at 9:10 pm | #

          Joe must be HUGE!

          • David
            David M Willis
            May 2, 2013 at 11:33 pm | #

            Yes, he is?

          • Bill M.
            Bill M.
            May 5, 2013 at 10:55 pm | #

            Yes, but this is a discussion about height…

      • Li
        Li
        May 5, 2013 at 9:15 am | #

        This is a weird definition of short. “Short for a man”, is that what you mean?

  7. Leonou
    Leonou
    May 2, 2013 at 12:51 am | #

    49 fucking minutes before being able to read that comic.

    And it was totally worth it !

  8. Aizat
    Aizat
    May 2, 2013 at 12:52 am | #

    So, she knows she got legs and she knows how to use them?

    • Bill M.
      Bill M.
      May 5, 2013 at 10:56 pm | #

      She never begs, she knows how to choose them?

  9. Aizat
    Aizat
    May 2, 2013 at 12:54 am | #

    Wait, she has a good strong, flexible legs? If she have thunderous thighs, I’d say Billie could be Chun-Li.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      May 2, 2013 at 12:55 am | #

      Whelp, so much for me going to bed early. Be back soon.

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        May 2, 2013 at 1:56 am | #

        Alright, now time for bed

        • Aizat
          Aizat
          May 2, 2013 at 2:01 am | #

          Thanks, Yotomoe! 🙂

        • Lumino
          Lumino
          May 2, 2013 at 3:13 am | #

          I can die a happy man.

          Or at least an amused one.

        • Kernanator
          Kernanator
          May 2, 2013 at 10:35 am | #

          Yaaaaay!

          You are a wonderful person.

        • Farmer_10
          Farmer_10
          May 2, 2013 at 5:00 pm | #

          Fantastic.

        • The E-man
          The E-man
          May 3, 2013 at 12:16 pm | #

          Yotomoe you are my favorite

        • Roborat
          Roborat
          May 3, 2013 at 3:42 pm | #

          I know I have said it before, but I will repeat it. Yotomoe, you have to do your own webcomic, that talent must be shared.

  10. Megatron
    Megatron
    May 2, 2013 at 12:55 am | #

    I applaud the fleshling creator for showing the beginnings of a coup. It is important for those in power to keep it by force, or…well you see what happens.

    • Aizat
      Aizat
      May 2, 2013 at 12:59 am | #

      Megatron? Is that you? I always wanted to say that.

      • Megatron
        Megatron
        May 2, 2013 at 2:02 am | #

        Here’s a hint.

        I think that joke was done a week or so ago.

  11. addude
    addude
    May 2, 2013 at 1:06 am | #

    Are we going to find Ruth dead?

    • Aizat
      Aizat
      May 2, 2013 at 1:07 am | #

      Or depressed.

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        May 2, 2013 at 1:08 am | #

        I’d be depressed if I was dead.

        • Ancestral Hamster
          Ancestral Hamster
          May 2, 2013 at 2:25 am | #

          No, no, if she’s dead, she won’t be depressed. Dead is dead. When she becomes undead, she might be depressed. Or not. If she comes back as a lich, wraith or vampire she’ll have so much power she won’t care that she’s undead.

          Living -> Dead -> Undead: it’s the path of existence! 😀

          • begbert2
            begbert2
            May 2, 2013 at 10:38 am | #

            Unless of course she died of having been pushed downwards too hard.

    • Rognik
      Rognik
      May 2, 2013 at 1:09 am | #

      passed out is my bet

    • Pinja
      Pinja
      May 2, 2013 at 2:42 am | #

      Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

      And that’s not a Vader no, that’s an “Everyone stop being teh dumb” no

    • Tenn
      Tenn
      May 2, 2013 at 3:00 am | #

      That would be rubbish.

      Also highly unlikely, since she hasn’t even said her Arc Words. It’s like Stavromula Beta.

      • Neospector
        Neospector
        May 2, 2013 at 11:05 am | #

        Rubbish.
        Either I see what you did there or I’m desperate for laughs.

        • Tenn
          Tenn
          May 3, 2013 at 3:51 am | #

          Huh? I was referencing Bo-Starr.

  12. Aizat
    Aizat
    May 2, 2013 at 1:12 am | #

    The peephole or as I like to call the Eye of Ruth.

  13. Aizat
    Aizat
    May 2, 2013 at 1:47 am | #

    The disadvantage of reading an American webcomic in Malaysia? It’s nighttime there when it’s afternoon here.

    • Megatron
      Megatron
      May 2, 2013 at 2:02 am | #

      And you have to deal with american fleshlings.

      • Aizat
        Aizat
        May 2, 2013 at 2:09 am | #

        Well, I don’t really want to judge Americans just based on the nutjobs.

        • Megatron
          Megatron
          May 2, 2013 at 3:06 am | #

          Good idea. There are only a few dozen non-nutjob americas, but we’re proud of our sanity (says the guy posting as Megatron with a cat on his head).

          • Robert
            Robert
            May 2, 2013 at 1:35 pm | #

            That’s a cat? It looks like a scorpion…

            • Megatron
              Megatron
              May 2, 2013 at 2:13 pm | #

              Megatron says it’s a cat!

              Seriously, take a look a the origianal + some other good stuff here.

  14. Robert
    Robert
    May 2, 2013 at 1:49 am | #

    I think Grace and Mandy are arguing about what that disgusting smell might be that’s coming from the R.A.’s dorm room. Mandy thinks it smells like old vomit and Yeager, where as Grace thinks it smells like a dead body covered in cat poop. Now both girls have noticed that there are a lot more flies hanging around the girls floor and a couple of days ago, Grace saw a huge cluster of Maggots infested in her favorite hoodie. Now Grace is all because she can’t wear her smelly grimy shirt anymore and Nancy thinks she’s acting like a paranoid little bongo and would someone give this girl a Zanack and some Ambien???

    • StaticAir
      StaticAir
      May 2, 2013 at 9:25 am | #

      I smell a really weird fanfic coming on!

  15. Nyxness
    Nyxness
    May 2, 2013 at 1:59 am | #

    Maybe she should put on some pants first?

  16. blackouthart
    blackouthart
    May 2, 2013 at 2:37 am | #

    Sweet, sweet validation, Billie. I’m glad for her, though since we’re dealing with Willis, I’m not sure how long it’ll last. Hope it lasts for today, though, poor girl needs some cheering.

  17. Pinja
    Pinja
    May 2, 2013 at 2:43 am | #

    http://www.dumbingofage.com/2012/comic/book-3/01-if-the-shoes-split/long/

    Grace and Mandy in case everyone forgot.

  18. Raen
    Raen
    May 2, 2013 at 2:50 am | #

    …Pixie Trix?

    Boy, they’re going to have the whole Internet if they keep up like this.

  19. Tenn
    Tenn
    May 2, 2013 at 2:51 am | #

    Anyone else see how Billie is turning all Hayao Miyazaki in the third panel? 🙂

  20. Freq
    Freq
    May 2, 2013 at 3:31 am | #

    Yes, go solve that dispute. But perhaps first… Pants?

    • saltchocolate
      saltchocolate
      May 2, 2013 at 7:29 am | #

      Yep. For this, she needs pants. Might be different if the spat was between Greg and Manuel!

  21. Chenrezi
    Chenrezi
    May 2, 2013 at 7:53 am | #

    SOON

    • StaticAir
      StaticAir
      May 2, 2013 at 9:26 am | #

      REVENGE SHALL BE MINE

  22. Kernanator
    Kernanator
    May 2, 2013 at 11:13 am | #

    “That’s right, I’m taking your job. WHAT NOW?”

  23. thepantswhisperer
    thepantswhisperer
    May 2, 2013 at 12:43 pm | #

    oh man, happy billie is ADORABLE

    • LiveWire
      LiveWire
      January 22, 2014 at 10:40 pm | #

      “Happy” Billie is scheming Billie.
      She’s going to take Ruth’s job, isn’t she?

  24. Angel
    Angel
    May 2, 2013 at 12:53 pm | #

    we need more negotiators who will work in panties.

  25. CheesustheGreat
    CheesustheGreat
    May 2, 2013 at 1:51 pm | #

    So, actually unrelated to this specific one, but todays Questionable Content totally has joyce in the first pannel

    • Concerned Citizen
      Concerned Citizen
      May 2, 2013 at 2:37 pm | #

      Proof that DoA and QC take place in the same universe!

    • Roborat
      Roborat
      May 3, 2013 at 3:47 pm | #

      Without a sweatervest, I refuse to accept that that is Joyce.

  26. Nym
    Nym
    May 2, 2013 at 3:12 pm | #

    This is the first time I’ve noticed the animated Dina header, and it is ridiculously awesome. Ridicuawesome. Seriously adorable and fun.

    On the topic of the today’s actual comic, it is pretty great to see Billie looking so pleased and happy.

  27. Animal
    Animal
    May 2, 2013 at 3:59 pm | #

    Billie + No Bra = Animal Seal of Approval.

  28. Ragnal
    Ragnal
    May 2, 2013 at 5:01 pm | #

    I just realized, Billie hasn’t worn her glasses all week. Is she wearing contacts?

    • David
      David M Willis
      May 2, 2013 at 10:38 pm | #

      It’s just early in the morning. She was only taking out the trash and hadn’t gotten dressed yet. Same reason Joyce wasn’t in a sweater vest earlier.

  29. Farmer_10
    Farmer_10
    May 2, 2013 at 5:02 pm | #

    The ultimate revenge on your nemesis: HELPING PEOPLE.

  30. Arkadi
    Arkadi
    May 2, 2013 at 5:06 pm | #

    Happy Billie is so goddamn cute and sexy, it’s downright disturbing. it’s like when Clark Kent takes off his glasses.

    Definitely me gusta.

  31. Ryan
    Ryan
    May 2, 2013 at 5:20 pm | #

    Boooo.

  32. Impy
    Impy
    May 2, 2013 at 7:08 pm | #

    “Ah, Ruth, my old friend. Do you know the cheerleader proverb that tells us that “revenge is a dish best served cold”? It is very cold on my FAAAAACE!

  33. Orion Fury
    Orion Fury
    May 3, 2013 at 12:14 am | #

    I could have swore I commented on this comic, but there’s no comment. Did I break a commenting rule? If so, is there a place where one can go to see what they are to avoid such things? I’m kinda lost.

  34. nothri
    nothri
    May 3, 2013 at 4:04 pm | #

    What is Billie even trying to accomplish here?

  35. wakawakawaka
    wakawakawaka
    May 5, 2013 at 4:50 pm | #

    I have a sickin’ feeling something is wrong with Ruth…

  36. Jenny Creed
    Jenny Creed
    July 27, 2013 at 12:34 pm | #

    I love a girl who can hold a knee at shoulder height and a conversation at the same time.

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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 18h
Mario Kart World hits my attention span just right. Why do I want to do the same lap 3 times in a row? Why can't all three-to-five laps be all different things who wants to drive in a circle mario kart world takes me places
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danschkade.bsky.social's user avatar
Dan Schkade @danschkade.bsky.social ⋅ 1y
Check out my new original character, Guy Around the Office Who's 100% Noticed That Clark Kent Is Superman
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
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damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
Asking an elderly person to identify Yosemite Sam is a real dementia check question, especially if they respond with his voice actor.
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
stop copying my story beats, luann!!!!!
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
thinking about how that one gijoe message board site is called hisstank, for some reason
techcrunch.com's user avatarTechCrunch @techcrunch.com ⋅ 3d
Jack Dorsey working on Bluetooth messaging app, Bitchat
header image - Jack Dorsey working on Bluetooth messaging app, Bitchat | TechCrunch
techcrunch.com
Jack Dorsey working on Bluetooth messaging app, Bitchat | TechCrunch
Block CEO and Twitter co-founder Jack Dorsey wrote in an X post on Sunday night that he spent his weekend creating an app called Bitchat (presumably a
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damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
Dumbing of Age: "More trouble" www.dumbingofage.com/2025/comic/b... #webcomics #webcomic
www.dumbingofage.com
More trouble
you can read tomorrow's strip now on patreon, if you want...
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
i know the second patreon bonus strip of the month tends to drop on the 6th day of the following month, and it's now the 9th, but i gotta hold on to this one for at least one more day, for reasons
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benrosen.bsky.social's user avatar
Ben Rosen @benrosen.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
1977: why would the bartender in star wars even care if some robots with artificial intelligence came into his bar 2025: ohhh ok
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nicoleoking.bsky.social's user avatar
Wineless Cat Mom @nicoleoking.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
Real AF; I too would delay releasing new music for 8 years to avoid being trapped in a vehicle with James Corden
James Corden admits he
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leavittalone.bsky.social's user avatar
John Leavitt @leavittalone.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
I am sincere when I say when lockdown happened and everyone decided to Go Onto Computer the majority of people didn’t have internet brainworm antibodies and now they’re the greatest marks known to man
ceej.online's user avatarceej @ceej.online ⋅ 2m
that a bunch of billionaires have been irreversibly brainwormed by getting addicted to a glorified chat room adds credence to my theory that spending too much time on IRC as a child acts as a powerful inoculant to the worst impulses of an escalatory group dynamic
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gthanku.bsky.social's user avatar
Puns N' Roses @gthanku.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
tagging the bad Jeffries like is that asshole your brother lol
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premthakker.bsky.social's user avatar
Prem Thakker ツ @premthakker.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
Hasan Kwame Jeffries is not only Hakeem Jeffries' brother, he is also a history professor at Ohio State University — where he teaches classes on African-American, US, and civil rights history
premthakker.bsky.social's user avatarPrem Thakker ツ @premthakker.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
Hakeem Jeffries' brother endorses Zohran Mamdani ––>
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
don't tell walky, but i massaged him out of a joyce head
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
I ask this about Beetle Bailey every day.
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
"You're/we're toast" was not coined as a phrase until 1984's Ghostbusters, so of course this French king from 1000AD of course doesn't understand the reference. A good cartoon.
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
A too-3D Joyce
damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatarDavid M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
Completo
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
linkin park mobile defense unit
diemtf.bsky.social's user avatarDiem @diemtf.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
See, THAT'S the kind of doofy-ass repaints I'm talking about.
Loyal Subjects 40th Anniversary Mobile Defense Unit (Rhino in all black and gold)
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zohrankmamdani.bsky.social's user avatar
Zohran Kwame Mamdani @zohrankmamdani.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
Shooting our videos is a little bit different now.
video thumbnail
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
today in #9chickweedlane i learned that these two should probably take Plan B after every time they spend a week Importantly Fucking in the pool
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