Dumbing of Age Book Eleven

Dumbing of Age

A college webcomic by David Willis
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September 28, 2023

Mornin’

by David M Willis on June 5, 2017 at 12:01 am
  • 04 - The 'Do' List

└ Tags: danny, joe

Discussion (533) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. Ana Chronistic
    Ana Chronistic
    June 5, 2017 at 12:02 am | #

    Look, bro, ACCORDION is where it’s at!

    (tho tbh I legit have both)

    • MM
      MM
      June 5, 2017 at 12:07 am | #

      Danny’s not weird enough to handle the accordion.

      • Ana Chronistic
        Ana Chronistic
        June 5, 2017 at 12:12 am | #

        Who needs to be weird?

        • Ana Chronistic
          Ana Chronistic
          June 5, 2017 at 12:13 am | #

          (that was the wrong way around, should be a link to TMBG)

        • Danni
          Danni
          June 5, 2017 at 12:13 am | #

          al does~!

      • John
        John
        June 5, 2017 at 12:55 am | #

        Weirdness is only required for playing the discordion.

        Hail Eris.

        • Whirlwitch
          Whirlwitch
          June 5, 2017 at 1:15 am | #

          Fnord!

          • Arianod
            Arianod
            June 5, 2017 at 1:26 am | #

            Bless you!

          • Proxiehunter
            Proxiehunter
            June 5, 2017 at 1:39 am | #

            How did you manage to make a blank post?

            • Tgape
              Tgape
              June 5, 2017 at 8:26 am | #

              That’s not a blank post! How did you miss that exclamation point?

    • Durandal_1707
      Durandal_1707
      June 5, 2017 at 1:54 am | #

      Q: An accordion, a viola, and a banjo all fall off of the roof of a 12-story building. Which one hits the ground first?

      A: Who cares?

      • Dara
        Dara
        June 5, 2017 at 3:18 am | #

        What’s perfect pitch?

        When the accordion you threw lands on the banjo without touching the trashcan’s rim.

      • Felix
        Felix
        June 5, 2017 at 3:31 am | #

        The heavies gains the greatest velocity, duh.

        • Clif
          Clif
          June 5, 2017 at 9:18 am | #

          Um.

          • begbert2
            begbert2
            June 5, 2017 at 10:49 am | #

            It would actually depend on which one fell off the roof first. The problem statement never said they fell off at the same time, after all.

            • Ari
              Ari
              June 5, 2017 at 4:44 pm | #

              Also air resistance!

      • Bickendan
        Bickendan
        June 5, 2017 at 4:18 am | #

        Thank Benny Goodman, Artie Shaw and Eddie Daniels the alto clarinet wasn’t a part of that joke!

      • hof1991
        hof1991
        June 5, 2017 at 3:44 pm | #

        Jeeves and Wooster playing Ladies on Spain in a Banjo Orchestra.
        https://youtu.be/_eEIIB5hVy4

      • Benjamin Geiger
        Benjamin Geiger
        June 5, 2017 at 4:08 pm | #

        I was driving cross-country with my accordion in the back seat. At one rest area, I got out to use the restroom and left the windows down.

        Realizing my mistake, I ran back to my car, but it was too late…

        … someone had left another accordion.

        • Roborat
          Roborat
          June 5, 2017 at 4:13 pm | #

          Saw that coming, but still funny.

        • durhamtyler
          durhamtyler
          June 5, 2017 at 11:05 pm | #

          I heard a variation of that joke years ago, but with bagpipes. Still a classic.

    • Aeron
      Aeron
      June 5, 2017 at 2:38 am | #

      Take “Weird Al” Yankovic. Does he play a ukulele? I didn’t think so!

    • MoonLord
      MoonLord
      June 5, 2017 at 3:22 am | #

      The Broccordion.

      • Remmington Steele
        Remmington Steele
        June 5, 2017 at 4:57 pm | #

        The Banjolele! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vEymZ3rXOmc

    • Crumplepunch
      Crumplepunch
      June 5, 2017 at 6:27 am | #

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fFM8IfTVpz0

    • Clif
      Clif
      June 5, 2017 at 4:45 pm | #

      ACCORDION? No, no. Everyone should have a Ryanskinned Ukulele from their ex. Play it proudly.

      • Remmington Steele
        Remmington Steele
        June 5, 2017 at 4:58 pm | #

        He’d probably make a better set of drums.

        Put his skeleton up as an aeolian harp.

  2. Foxhack
    Foxhack
    June 5, 2017 at 12:02 am | #

    GIVE US THE DRAMA, WILLIS

    • foamy
      foamy
      June 5, 2017 at 12:09 am | #

      Jesus man, that’s evil.

      • Emperor Daniel
        Emperor Daniel
        June 5, 2017 at 12:14 am | #

        Could this be even considered . . . an unknown evil?

        • Aeron
          Aeron
          June 5, 2017 at 2:39 am | #

          It’s a known unknown.

  3. Emperor Daniel
    Emperor Daniel
    June 5, 2017 at 12:02 am | #

    Whiplash like nobody’s business.

    • Emperor Daniel
      Emperor Daniel
      June 5, 2017 at 12:04 am | #

      (And yes, I saw the “storyline over” comment in the previous strip.)

    • Undrave
      Undrave
      June 5, 2017 at 12:20 am | #

      Mood neckbrace for everyone!

      • JepMZ
        JepMZ
        June 5, 2017 at 1:08 am | #

        What if I lost my head?

        • Needfuldoer
          Needfuldoer
          June 5, 2017 at 2:25 am | #

          We’ll try to reattach it pointing in the right direction, then you get your mood neck brace.

    • McBogue
      McBogue
      June 5, 2017 at 3:01 am | #

      Webcomic Tonal Whiplash?

      BETTER CALL SAUL!

  4. AnvilPro
    AnvilPro
    June 5, 2017 at 12:02 am | #

    God damn it Willis, you’re gonna time skip after that?

    • Kitanin
      Kitanin
      June 5, 2017 at 12:04 am | #

      Pretty sure it’s not so much of a time skip, as a time [falsetto]tiptoe through the tulips…[/falsetto]

      • Gerard
        Gerard
        June 5, 2017 at 12:14 am | #

        In Wilis time it’s a time skip. This three days should’ve taken months!

        • Cholma
          Cholma
          June 5, 2017 at 12:56 am | #

          *Watches joke tiptoe past Gerard, through the window, into the garden*

          • begbert2
            begbert2
            June 5, 2017 at 10:50 am | #

            Past the willow tree?

          • saltchocolate
            saltchocolate
            June 5, 2017 at 6:29 pm | #

            That’s where I’ll be . . .

    • David
      David
      June 5, 2017 at 12:45 am | #

      Three days are a customary time to prepare for a funeral.

      • Fart Captor
        Fart Captor
        June 5, 2017 at 12:47 am | #

        I don’t think it would take that long for them to flush the ashes, even being extra careful not to clog the plumbing

        • John
          John
          June 5, 2017 at 12:58 am | #

          It probably took Amber a while to cut him into small enough pieces to flush.

      • foamy
        foamy
        June 5, 2017 at 2:54 am | #

        Also the traditional time for coming back from the dead.

        • Dara
          Dara
          June 5, 2017 at 3:20 am | #

          Now he’s gonna be a vampire? Great.

          • DarkoNeko
            DarkoNeko
            June 5, 2017 at 5:43 am | #

            Or, you know, a zombie.

            • begbert2
              begbert2
              June 5, 2017 at 10:51 am | #

              Or a diety, I suppose. Given the ‘traditional time’ in question, and all.

    • abacuswizard
      abacuswizard
      June 5, 2017 at 1:04 am | #

      At least it’s not “Three and a half years later” and they’re all in gowns and mortarboards.

  5. Mr Ak
    Mr Ak
    June 5, 2017 at 12:02 am | #

    Goddamn it.

  6. MissFortune
    MissFortune
    June 5, 2017 at 12:02 am | #

    A FUCKING TIME JUMP? What is this, BSG?

    • lejwocky
      lejwocky
      June 5, 2017 at 12:20 am | #

      At least it’s not 25 years later…

      • MissFortune
        MissFortune
        June 5, 2017 at 12:22 am | #

        I dunno, in the Dumbiverse 3 days takes like a year and a half, so…

    • JepMZ
      JepMZ
      June 5, 2017 at 2:50 am | #

      It probably needs to zoom in on Dorothy’s eyes so much until you see reflection of Amber’s knife in her pupil lunging to something and then her hand comes back out but with a ukulele. And then it zooms out of the eye until we notice it’s Joe’s face sleepily blinking

  7. Danni
    Danni
    June 5, 2017 at 12:02 am | #

    danny, learn to play somewhere over the rainbow with that.

    • Undrave
      Undrave
      June 5, 2017 at 12:03 am | #

      No! He should learn to play ‘We Are the Crystal Gems’!

      • Danni
        Danni
        June 5, 2017 at 12:04 am | #

        somewhere over the rainbow!

        • jeffepp
          jeffepp
          June 5, 2017 at 12:06 am | #

          The Rainbow Connection?

          • Danni
            Danni
            June 5, 2017 at 12:08 am | #

            that works

          • Proxiehunter
            Proxiehunter
            June 5, 2017 at 1:41 am | #

            Somewhere over the rainbow connection we are the Crystal Gems.

            • Pablo360
              Pablo360
              June 8, 2017 at 4:01 pm | #

              And we’ll always live in a riptide submarine

          • Abel Undercity
            Abel Undercity
            June 5, 2017 at 4:15 am | #

            That’s more of a banjo song. Hey, Danny, there’s an idea…

      • SailorCake
        SailorCake
        June 5, 2017 at 12:08 am | #

        I know how to play ‘We Are the Crystal Gems’ on the ukulele

        • Pablo360
          Pablo360
          June 5, 2017 at 8:11 pm | #

          Child’s play. I can play Love Like You.

          I tried to learn Is There Anything That’s Worth More Than Peace And Love On The Planet Earth but that shit is IN MOTHER FUCKING ⛺️

      • Doctor_Who
        Doctor_Who
        June 5, 2017 at 12:16 am | #

        That was actually my first thought when I saw him with it.

      • C baker
        C baker
        June 5, 2017 at 12:33 am | #

        We always save the day!

        • Jinxed44
          Jinxed44
          June 5, 2017 at 10:42 am | #

          And if you think we can’t
          We’ll always find a way!

      • ValdVin
        ValdVin
        June 5, 2017 at 8:43 am | #

        How about the Bob’s Burgers theme?

        • Ivy
          Ivy
          June 5, 2017 at 7:34 pm | #

          That ones hard

    • Reltzik
      Reltzik
      June 5, 2017 at 12:08 am | #

      Dueling banjos!

      (Needs to be double-necked, though.)

    • Undrave
      Undrave
      June 5, 2017 at 12:10 am | #

      Or maybe Danny’s more of a ‘Giant Woman’ kind of guy?

      • Danni
        Danni
        June 5, 2017 at 12:12 am | #

        how about ‘be wherever you are’ for steven universe song?

        • Undrave
          Undrave
          June 5, 2017 at 12:21 am | #

          Could work, could work!

        • Falling Star
          Falling Star
          June 5, 2017 at 6:37 am | #

          What about Here Comes a Thought? That one feels a little closer to the overall mood of thIs webcomic.

          • Lumpy Frogsnuggler
            Lumpy Frogsnuggler
            June 5, 2017 at 11:30 am | #

            i was thinking the Jam Song.

            the sun is bright

            our shirts are clean

            we’re sitting near a murder scene

            come on and share this jam with me

            • ValdVin
              ValdVin
              June 5, 2017 at 12:32 pm | #

              “I’ll do my best to give this corpse the treatment he deserved.”

              “And I’ll keep it fresh, the coroner will see it’s preserved.”

      • Lawzlo
        Lawzlo
        June 5, 2017 at 1:15 am | #

        No, he’s into Amazi-Girl, not Giant Woman.

        • Opus the Poet
          Opus the Poet
          June 5, 2017 at 1:40 am | #

          Split the difference? http://www.giantgirladventures.com/

    • TheGrammarLegionary
      TheGrammarLegionary
      June 5, 2017 at 2:02 am | #

      I teach guitar, and recently branched out into ukulele. Bought a blue ukulele, and the first thing I learned to play was Over The Rainbow.

      • Remmington Steele
        Remmington Steele
        June 5, 2017 at 4:43 am | #

        I had one, seem to have lost it. This has regenerated my yearnings.

    • foamy
      foamy
      June 5, 2017 at 3:03 am | #

      Nah: Devil Went Down To Georgia.

    • Dara
      Dara
      June 5, 2017 at 3:21 am | #

      “An Open Letter to Stephen Fry.”

  8. Nono
    Nono
    June 5, 2017 at 12:02 am | #

    Huh, Joe doesn’t have the abs I’d have expected him to have for some reason.

    • Rosicrucian
      Rosicrucian
      June 5, 2017 at 12:04 am | #

      Freshman Fifteen.

      And he doesn’t lift like Jacob does.

    • Ana Chronistic
      Ana Chronistic
      June 5, 2017 at 12:14 am | #

      you can totes be buff (read: actually strong) and have no definition, it’s healthy fat

      • Eldritch Gentleman
        Eldritch Gentleman
        June 5, 2017 at 3:53 am | #

        Just like Maui

    • Theluxland
      Theluxland
      June 5, 2017 at 1:19 pm | #

      That was a sight I never want to forget anyway XD

  9. Undrave
    Undrave
    June 5, 2017 at 12:03 am | #

    DAMN YOU WILLIS!!!

    • saltchocolate
      saltchocolate
      June 5, 2017 at 6:26 am | #

      And I repeat: DAMN YOU WILLIS!!!

  10. Roger Sterling
    Roger Sterling
    June 5, 2017 at 12:03 am | #

    Willis…you magnificent bastard I READ YOUR BOOK!

    • smolgrlboi
      smolgrlboi
      June 6, 2017 at 12:52 am | #

      fave comment

  11. Black
    Black
    June 5, 2017 at 12:03 am | #

    Well, that de-escalated quickly…

    • Reltzik
      Reltzik
      June 5, 2017 at 12:09 am | #

      Which was odd, because I didn’t think Ryan was the sort of person who could be staired down.

      *flees for dear punning life*

      • Emperor Daniel
        Emperor Daniel
        June 5, 2017 at 12:10 am | #

        It’s a good thing Amber was there to cut him down to size.

        • Reltzik
          Reltzik
          June 5, 2017 at 12:31 am | #

          The moment he lost the knife, he lost his only edge.

          • Emperor Daniel
            Emperor Daniel
            June 5, 2017 at 12:43 am | #

            If he’d brought a firearm, Amber would’ve soon had him fleeing for his dear gunning life.

            • Reltzik
              Reltzik
              June 5, 2017 at 1:14 am | #

              Nothing like a weapon to give a coward a shot of courage.

              • Emperor Daniel
                Emperor Daniel
                June 5, 2017 at 1:22 am | #

                Without it, he didn’t even have a stab in the dark at winning.

                • Reltzik
                  Reltzik
                  June 5, 2017 at 8:15 am | #

                  So the point is that he’s a loser either way.

                • Clif
                  Clif
                  June 5, 2017 at 9:25 am | #

                  I think it was the phone that had the point.

                • Reltzik
                  Reltzik
                  June 5, 2017 at 9:53 am | #

                  Like I said, I’m pretty sure it was a RAZR.

                • Emperor Daniel
                  Emperor Daniel
                  June 5, 2017 at 10:43 am | #

                  The phone’s audio quality is pretty sharply defined.

                • Reltzik
                  Reltzik
                  June 5, 2017 at 11:38 am | #

                  I saw what you did there.

                • Orion Fury
                  Orion Fury
                  June 5, 2017 at 10:47 pm | #

                  I think this comment thread is unravelling now.

                • Emperor Daniel
                  Emperor Daniel
                  June 5, 2017 at 11:39 pm | #

                  At least we’re not mindless hacks?

    • Pat
      Pat
      June 5, 2017 at 12:09 am | #

      That’s called “falling.”

      • Undrave
        Undrave
        June 5, 2017 at 12:11 am | #

        More like plummeting!

  12. Corlanthis
    Corlanthis
    June 5, 2017 at 12:03 am | #

    Well this feels warranted.

    DAMN YOU, WILLIS!

  13. Yumi
    Yumi
    June 5, 2017 at 12:03 am | #

    Three days later, are you shitting me????

    • Okami
      Okami
      June 5, 2017 at 12:09 am | #

      “I am not shitting on you”

      • Clif
        Clif
        June 5, 2017 at 9:27 am | #

        Who then?

  14. TimeLoss
    TimeLoss
    June 5, 2017 at 12:03 am | #

    3 days is enough time to marathon all of the ABC hit show “How to Get Away with Murder” and… take notes

    • Undrave
      Undrave
      June 5, 2017 at 12:13 am | #

      Or to get into a hilarious comedy of error as they ‘Weekend at Bernie’ their way down to New-Orleans to throw Ryan to some gators so nature can take the blame!

    • Tawdry Quirks
      Tawdry Quirks
      June 5, 2017 at 2:59 am | #

      The number one lesson to learn from that show is not to kill anybody, because otherwise you’ll have to kill even more people to stay out of prison, and might potentially end up getting murdered yourself.

  15. Emperor Daniel
    Emperor Daniel
    June 5, 2017 at 12:03 am | #

    I guess you could now call him . . . “Danukelele”?

    • Undrave
      Undrave
      June 5, 2017 at 12:06 am | #

      No.

    • Reltzik
      Reltzik
      June 5, 2017 at 12:12 am | #

      Danny: “I call it the ukulDanny.”
      Joe: “I kill Danny?”
      Danny: “No, the ukulDa-” *hurk*
      Joe: “If you play it too early in the morning, I’m going to get its name wrong.”

    • Deanatay
      Deanatay
      June 5, 2017 at 9:45 am | #

      I believe it’s time for a ‘Damn You-Kelele!’

  16. Nicster216
    Nicster216
    June 5, 2017 at 12:03 am | #

    Well…..at least he’s getting over Amber well

    • Reltzik
      Reltzik
      June 5, 2017 at 12:12 am | #

      If by “well”, you mean “spiraling down into a well of despair and nihilsim to the point where he will take up the ukulele.”

      • Undrave
        Undrave
        June 5, 2017 at 12:14 am | #

        It was either that or cocaine, but the ukulele is way cheaper.

        • Suzi
          Suzi
          June 5, 2017 at 12:42 am | #

          Only the crap-quality ukulele like that blue plastic piece of crap he’s holding.

          Damnit I’m a ukulele hipster now.

        • Reltzik
          Reltzik
          June 5, 2017 at 12:44 am | #

          ….. also, Danny and cocaine.

        • achallenger
          achallenger
          June 5, 2017 at 5:49 am | #

          financially maybe but the emotional cost is thru the roof

  17. Kris
    Kris
    June 5, 2017 at 12:03 am | #

    I’m sure he’ll play a touching song on that mini guitar at Ryan’s funeral

  18. Goki
    Goki
    June 5, 2017 at 12:03 am | #

    Not the worst I have seen Willis troll us… but X_X….

  19. Ridureyu
    Ridureyu
    June 5, 2017 at 12:04 am | #

    It is determined: EVerything that happened in the last strip is all Danny’s fault, because that Ukelele causes murderous rage.

    • Clif
      Clif
      June 5, 2017 at 9:29 am | #

      Retroactively in time.

  20. shadowcell
    shadowcell
    June 5, 2017 at 12:04 am | #

    his best song is “love cuts like a knife”

    • jeffepp
      jeffepp
      June 5, 2017 at 12:05 am | #

      But, it feels alright.

      • Clif
        Clif
        June 5, 2017 at 9:31 am | #

        Isn’t the correct title “love cuts like a phone”

        • David M Willis
          David M Willis
          June 5, 2017 at 9:24 pm | #

          savage

    • Random832
      Random832
      June 5, 2017 at 9:05 pm | #

      cuts like a willis comic

  21. Sporky
    Sporky
    June 5, 2017 at 12:04 am | #

    this is a very roomies-esque strip

    • Cattleprod
      Cattleprod
      June 5, 2017 at 12:06 am | #

      It really does feel like something from a gag-a-day strip, which helps maximize the whiplash.

      • Orion Fury
        Orion Fury
        June 5, 2017 at 10:50 pm | #

        It’s a palate cleanser.

    • Minder
      Minder
      June 5, 2017 at 1:25 am | #

      I think that is the point!

  22. jeffepp
    jeffepp
    June 5, 2017 at 12:04 am | #

    Angst queen Danny is making jokes. Amber murdered a dude, and he’s making jokes?

    • Shiro
      Shiro
      June 5, 2017 at 12:06 am | #

      This tells me Danny doesn’t know Amber (maybe) murdered a dude. How doesn’t Danny know? Has he been this far under a rock, or was it hushed up?

      • Undrave
        Undrave
        June 5, 2017 at 12:07 am | #

        Even if e didn’t know Amber did it a murder on campus would be a big deal!

        • Danni
          Danni
          June 5, 2017 at 12:09 am | #

          unless amber didnt murder the bastard and only left him in massive pain.

          • jeffepp
            jeffepp
            June 5, 2017 at 12:13 am | #

            Close enough. She only killed him a little bit.

            Still, the conversation implies that Amber is no longer around.

            • Fart Captor
              Fart Captor
              June 5, 2017 at 12:26 am | #

              They broke up like a week ago. The conversation implies that Amber is fine, or else Danny would be angsting about it.

              • Clif
                Clif
                June 5, 2017 at 9:33 am | #

                Agreed. So incident not reported.

      • fillerusername
        fillerusername
        June 5, 2017 at 12:12 am | #

        Whatever happened must have been hushed up somehow because both Danny and Joe are showing no signs of knowing anything. I think we were deliberately given this pairing to show that because Dorothy being friends with Joe and Amber/Dorothy being Danny’s exes if word had gotten out they’d be affected by it. So these two going along like everything’s fine and normal means no one knows anything yet.

        • TheOthin
          TheOthin
          June 5, 2017 at 12:25 am | #

          It’s also possible that it’ll come up later in the conversation.

      • Eyebrow
        Eyebrow
        June 5, 2017 at 7:29 am | #

        Murder? Unnecessary.
        Castration with a knife? Necessary and sufficient.

    • Sam
      Sam
      June 5, 2017 at 12:14 am | #

      He’s not dead. If he were dead, everyone would know and would be terrified that a murder happened on campus even if they didn’t know who died or who did it.

      • C.T Phipps
        C.T Phipps
        June 5, 2017 at 12:27 am | #

        Honestly, if the campus was like, “That’s awful, time for class.” about a murder happening on campus that would be about par for the course at Ohio University, Athens. There’s a lot more violent crime on campuses than you’d ever know about.

      • Meta
        Meta
        June 5, 2017 at 4:26 am | #

        I agree, but more because Danny would know if Amber had killed somebody.

    • David
      David
      June 5, 2017 at 12:48 am | #

      Danny’s not invested in Amber but Amazi-Girl.

      • thejeff
        thejeff
        June 5, 2017 at 7:15 am | #

        No, Danny was invested in both. Even if he was only officially dating Amazi-Girl. He showed that again and again.

        • Spencer
          Spencer
          June 5, 2017 at 3:42 pm | #

          I mean ever since finding out she was Amber he was stringent on trying to date her as herself, thought the whole thing was a game, and very clearly cared about her and her wellbeing so I don’t know how anyone could say he wasn’t invested in Amber.

    • John
      John
      June 5, 2017 at 1:10 am | #

      Amber self-defensed a dude.

    • Minder
      Minder
      June 5, 2017 at 1:29 am | #

      People are able to laugh after something bad happens. Like, your brain kind of forces you to insert humor into a morbid or terrifying situation the second it detects that your environment is no longer immediately dangerous or stressful and then suddenly you’re cracking a joke and forgetting for two seconds that something terrible happened to a love one.

      Angst queen Danny is either stressed and nervous because he senses something happened but doesn’t know what to do about it, or he knows very well and has been locked in his room for three days stressing out about it. Nervous energy is a great way to learn new skills like playing ukulele so HE HAS TO KEEP IT THE UKULELE JOKES NEED TO STAY

  23. Briny
    Briny
    June 5, 2017 at 12:05 am | #

    YES.

  24. Shiro
    Shiro
    June 5, 2017 at 12:05 am | #

    NO Willis! Bad Willis! Back to the other thing!

  25. Cattleprod
    Cattleprod
    June 5, 2017 at 12:05 am | #

    Gah, this is like most other fiction cutting to ‘five years later’. THREE DAYS?

    • Fart Captor
      Fart Captor
      June 5, 2017 at 1:03 am | #

      SOMEBODY CHECK THE MOON D:

      • Gesc
        Gesc
        June 5, 2017 at 2:16 am | #

        Prepare your ocarina!

        • MatthewTheLucky
          MatthewTheLucky
          June 5, 2017 at 11:49 pm | #

          Joe’s met with a terrible fate, hasn’t he?

  26. Synnerman
    Synnerman
    June 5, 2017 at 12:05 am | #

    NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

    *SOBS*

    It’s storitus interruptus!

    OMG… I can’t… I just can’t… I don’t know what I can’t anymore I so can’t, can’t.

    • Reltzik
      Reltzik
      June 5, 2017 at 12:16 am | #

      There’s only one thing we can do.

      We speculate.

      It’s like how when we don’t have coffee we can drink chicory instead.

      ….

      Okay, so, two options. Speculation, or self-induced percussive coma so that when we wake up again enough new comments have been posted for us to get closure.

      • Clif
        Clif
        June 5, 2017 at 9:38 am | #

        Three options. Speculation. Self-induced coma to reach the future faster. Shaking your fist at the sky and yelling “DAMN YOU WILLIS!!”

        These options are not mutually exclusive.

        • Reltzik
          Reltzik
          June 5, 2017 at 11:41 am | #

          And an almost fanartical devotion to the fanon.

  27. The Mad Academic
    The Mad Academic
    June 5, 2017 at 12:05 am | #

    YES!

    • Lingo
      Lingo
      June 5, 2017 at 12:45 am | #

      This comic needs more Arnold. (And Ken. And Lucy.)

  28. Aislashu
    Aislashu
    June 5, 2017 at 12:05 am | #

    Triggered (Or should I say…hilted?)

    • Shiro
      Shiro
      June 5, 2017 at 12:06 am | #

      Idk but you definitely shouldn’t be making tasteless jokes about triggers.

      • Pat
        Pat
        June 5, 2017 at 12:11 am | #

        …that’s a joke?
        Where’s the part that’s a joke?

        • Andy
          Andy
          June 5, 2017 at 11:47 am | #

          Apparently saying “Triggered!” randomly is all that’s needed to complete the joke. Because nothing says humor like mocking trauma.

  29. Saaaam
    Saaaam
    June 5, 2017 at 12:06 am | #

    After getting bloodlust, Amber knifed everyone, and this is Joe in hell.

    • Undrave
      Undrave
      June 5, 2017 at 12:15 am | #

      No, this is the ukulele’s hell.

      • Opus the Poet
        Opus the Poet
        June 5, 2017 at 1:57 am | #

        Joe’s Hell, Danny has an endless supply of ukuleles. And kazoos. “Who the gods would destroy they must first drive insane.”

  30. Stephen Bierce
    Stephen Bierce
    June 5, 2017 at 12:06 am | #

    *plays Jeff Beck’s “Ambitious” on the hacked Muzak*

    • Dara
      Dara
      June 5, 2017 at 3:23 am | #

      DOES NO ONE HERE LIKE MOLLY LEWIS?

  31. Derek
    Derek
    June 5, 2017 at 12:06 am | #

    deja vu? have we seen this panel in previews or something?

    • vlademir1
      vlademir1
      June 5, 2017 at 3:01 am | #

      This was the preview strip for Kickstarter.

      • Axel
        Axel
        June 5, 2017 at 10:57 am | #

        THANK YOU, I was also trying to figure out where I read this before, or if it was a retread of a roomies joke or something, because the deja vu was strong.

  32. chromacandi
    chromacandi
    June 5, 2017 at 12:06 am | #

    I refreshed like crazy for this??

  33. Reltzik
    Reltzik
    June 5, 2017 at 12:06 am | #

    And, of course, we get no resolution to the Amber/Ryan slash. I (and everyone else) called it. Willis often trolls us with cliffihangers. Today, he’s stringing us along with a ukulele.

    ….

    ….

    *flees for dear punning life*

    • Emperor Daniel
      Emperor Daniel
      June 5, 2017 at 12:08 am | #

      He really played us with that one.

      • Reltzik
        Reltzik
        June 5, 2017 at 12:35 am | #

        I think he’s trying to make us fret.

        • Emperor Daniel
          Emperor Daniel
          June 5, 2017 at 12:44 am | #

          I treble with anticipation for a resolution of yesterday’s cliffhanger.

          • Reltzik
            Reltzik
            June 5, 2017 at 1:15 am | #

            Sorry, that storyline’s overture.

            • Emperor Daniel
              Emperor Daniel
              June 5, 2017 at 1:23 am | #

              All orchestrated by Willis, of course.

              • Jon S.
                Jon S.
                June 5, 2017 at 3:53 am | #

                He’s cleffed us in twain.

                • Reltzik
                  Reltzik
                  June 5, 2017 at 8:16 am | #

                  That’s how he likes to conduct his comic empire.

                • Emperor Daniel
                  Emperor Daniel
                  June 5, 2017 at 10:44 am | #

                  We should all be taking notation.

    • Cephalo the Pod
      Cephalo the Pod
      June 5, 2017 at 12:12 am | #

      No resolution? How is it not obvious that Ryan is hospitalized and Amazi-Girl fled the scene, leaving behind a terified Dorothy?

      • Emperor Daniel
        Emperor Daniel
        June 5, 2017 at 12:16 am | #

        Boo, you’re no pun.

      • Clif
        Clif
        June 5, 2017 at 9:47 am | #

        It is not obvious that Ryan was injured enough to be hospitalized. It is not obvious that Ryan is alive. It IS obvious that Amazigirl did not flee the scene, because that identity wasn’t there.

        And as Billie would point out, neither was Sal.

  34. MM
    MM
    June 5, 2017 at 12:07 am | #

    I feel like this strip should’ve been Joe peering through the window or keyhole in horror as Danny picked up the ukelele and began strumming.

    • TrueVCU
      TrueVCU
      June 5, 2017 at 12:08 am | #

      And then Ethan peering through a second window/keyhole at Joe :3

      • Clif
        Clif
        June 5, 2017 at 9:49 am | #

        Ethan would be more likely paying attention to Danny.

        I wonder how Ethan, or for that matter Amber, feels about the banjo.

  35. TrueVCU
    TrueVCU
    June 5, 2017 at 12:07 am | #

    VETO’D

  36. Mr.J
    Mr.J
    June 5, 2017 at 12:07 am | #

    Three days later: Amber is still beating the hell out of him.

    • Emperor Daniel
      Emperor Daniel
      June 5, 2017 at 12:13 am | #

      People walk by Amber and Ryan on their way to class. Amber is still hacking away. “Oh, just your regular Saturday morning slicing-of-life show…” they say, paying little heed as they stroll on by.

      • Undrave
        Undrave
        June 5, 2017 at 12:16 am | #

        People just keep tissing change her way, thinking it’s a brilliant piece of performance art.

        • Reltzik
          Reltzik
          June 5, 2017 at 12:19 am | #

          Or because they know Ryan, and not in a good way.

        • Undrave
          Undrave
          June 5, 2017 at 12:19 am | #

          *tossing dangit ><

      • Yumi
        Yumi
        June 5, 2017 at 12:23 am | #

        Why do these people have class on Saturday

        • Emperor Daniel
          Emperor Daniel
          June 5, 2017 at 12:29 am | #

          That’s another of the great mysteries, behind “How do they get the snow into snowglobes”.

          It’s clearly the work of dark wizards.

        • Eldritch Gentleman
          Eldritch Gentleman
          June 5, 2017 at 5:45 am | #

          Not sure what the term is in US but… non-stationary students? Basically people who have jobs or for some other reasons can’t study normally and have a University-light version where they have classes on Saturday and Sunday.

      • Eldritch Gentleman
        Eldritch Gentleman
        June 5, 2017 at 5:46 am | #

        Dear God Emperor on his Golden Throne O_o I have entered some kind of cult of Chaos God of Puns. Need to go and tell the Inquisition!

        • DonDueed
          DonDueed
          June 5, 2017 at 1:27 pm | #

          Nobody expects the Punnish Inquisition!

          • Eldritch Gentleman
            Eldritch Gentleman
            June 5, 2017 at 2:41 pm | #

            This is a job for Ordo Punnus!

  37. Passchendaele
    Passchendaele
    June 5, 2017 at 12:08 am | #

    The concept of Danny soul-searching scares the crap out of me. Let’s hope he doesn’t become a self-righteous wiseass. 😛

    • Emperor Daniel
      Emperor Daniel
      June 5, 2017 at 12:10 am | #

      Nah, you gotta hit Ruth with a non-metaphorical truck for that to happen.

      • Passchendaele
        Passchendaele
        June 5, 2017 at 12:22 am | #

        hopefully Ruth won’t need to step outside for a week or two, just to be safe. :p

    • Undrave
      Undrave
      June 5, 2017 at 12:17 am | #

      Maybe he could do a semester abroad, in someplace so different and full of philosophy.

      Like Winnipeg.

      • Eldritch Gentleman
        Eldritch Gentleman
        June 5, 2017 at 5:48 am | #

        Send him to Gravity Falls. After That kind of adventurer he’ll be immune to everything the world can throw at him.

    • Passchendaele
      Passchendaele
      June 5, 2017 at 12:19 am | #

      Also, I just realized there is a tiny smily face on the bottom left of this page. Having *clearly* discovered it, I name it Chad. bow down to chad.

      (this is the most roomies! strip in doa I’ve seen, except Danny isn’t sulking/upset. I like it.)

    • Reltzik
      Reltzik
      June 5, 2017 at 12:20 am | #

      I don’t know. He went searching for his soul and found a ukulele instead. I think it’s safe to say he’s off-course.

      ….

      Soul typically uses bass or a conventional guitar instead.

      • Emperor Daniel
        Emperor Daniel
        June 5, 2017 at 12:22 am | #

        Are youkelele sure about that?

        • Reltzik
          Reltzik
          June 5, 2017 at 12:32 am | #

          Well it’s hardly a bassless assertion.

          • Emperor Daniel
            Emperor Daniel
            June 5, 2017 at 12:40 am | #

            I hope no-one sympathizes with Ryan for “being a victim of senseless violins”.

            • Reltzik
              Reltzik
              June 5, 2017 at 12:54 am | #

              Unfortunately, I’m sure he’ll be able to drum up some support. People will think he’s cymbalic of some oppressed priveleged group or another.

              • Emperor Daniel
                Emperor Daniel
                June 5, 2017 at 1:03 am | #

                Yeah, that situation’s often a bongo to play. If only people would stop acting accordion to their preconceptions.

                • Reltzik
                  Reltzik
                  June 5, 2017 at 1:16 am | #

                  Yeah, but everyone feels they have to chime in.

                • Emperor Daniel
                  Emperor Daniel
                  June 5, 2017 at 1:23 am | #

                  Does this ring a bell?

                • joe archer
                  joe archer
                  June 5, 2017 at 1:34 am | #

                  Let’s hope no vital organs were sounded.

                • Reltzik
                  Reltzik
                  June 5, 2017 at 8:20 am | #

                  Depends how badly Ryan got scored.

                • Clif
                  Clif
                  June 5, 2017 at 9:52 am | #

                  I’m just glad he had to face the music.

                • Reltzik
                  Reltzik
                  June 5, 2017 at 9:55 am | #

                  He might still come back, though. His defeat might be tempo-rary.

                • Emperor Daniel
                  Emperor Daniel
                  June 5, 2017 at 10:47 am | #

                  If he’s still out there, odds that he’ll come back balalaika-n annoying thing that just won’t go away?

                • Reltzik
                  Reltzik
                  June 5, 2017 at 11:46 am | #

                  But this time it won’t be with a blade. He’ll be playing spoons instead.

                • Orion Fury
                  Orion Fury
                  June 5, 2017 at 10:56 pm | #

                  Now this pun thread isn’t toying around.

                • Emperor Daniel
                  Emperor Daniel
                  June 5, 2017 at 11:40 pm | #

                  It’s all fun and games until someone reveals he’s Lute’s father.

  38. JetstreamGW
    JetstreamGW
    June 5, 2017 at 12:08 am | #

    Things that bother you never bother me. I feel happy and fine, aha!
    Living in the sunlight, loving in the moonlight, having a wonderful time!

  39. fillerusername
    fillerusername
    June 5, 2017 at 12:08 am | #

    Aww it’s blue! I support you in this Danny.

    ….So I’m guessing everything that went down has somehow not gotten around campus?

  40. Magdalana
    Magdalana
    June 5, 2017 at 12:08 am | #

    I swear to God I had to stop and check if it was April Fool’s Day.

  41. Valerie
    Valerie
    June 5, 2017 at 12:08 am | #

    DAMN YOU, WILLIS

  42. Sam
    Sam
    June 5, 2017 at 12:09 am | #

    EXCUSE ME.

    ‘Three days later. I’ve got a Ukelele’!?

    There are no words that can truly convey how this has killed my soul.

    • Fart Captor
      Fart Captor
      June 5, 2017 at 12:12 am | #

      In a week, EVERYONE will have them!

      • Danni
        Danni
        June 5, 2017 at 12:16 am | #

        i dont have a ukulele

        • Inspector Hound
          Inspector Hound
          June 5, 2017 at 3:38 pm | #

          Please report to the nearest indoctrination center for your ukulele.

          If you do not have a ukulele by end of week, please report to the department of music corrections.

          That is all.

          • Orion Fury
            Orion Fury
            June 5, 2017 at 10:59 pm | #

            Huh, it says here that you’re bad at dealing with Home Economics. We weren’t even testing for that.

    • Reltzik
      Reltzik
      June 5, 2017 at 12:21 am | #

      I think the word “ukulele” conveys the concept of soul-killing-ness pretty darn well.

  43. Tarmaniel
    Tarmaniel
    June 5, 2017 at 12:09 am | #

    I’m surprised that so many people are surprised. This is the kickstarter poll strip. We’ve alreadyvseen it. It even had the date on it.

    • Lingo
      Lingo
      June 5, 2017 at 12:48 am | #

      Well good for you, but I hadn’t seen it.

    • JessWitt
      JessWitt
      June 5, 2017 at 3:35 am | #

      I didn’t care to keep track of the date personally. Still, it made for a bittersweet surprise (and I knew we weren’t going to see the Ryan-Amber knife fight through to an immediate end).

  44. Mandy
    Mandy
    June 5, 2017 at 12:10 am | #

    Ah, so the unspoken evil mentioned on Kickstarter WAS the time-skip.

    • Tacos
      Tacos
      June 5, 2017 at 12:16 am | #

      Are you sure it’s not the ukulele?

      • Danni
        Danni
        June 5, 2017 at 12:17 am | #

        ukuleles bring goodness! dont blaspheme ukuleles!

        • Deanatay
          Deanatay
          June 5, 2017 at 9:51 am | #

          Only when you smash them…

      • Reltzik
        Reltzik
        June 5, 2017 at 12:22 am | #

        It’s a ukulele that sounds like a skipping CD.

        …..

        …. I just dated myself, didn’t I? DAMMIT TECHNOLOGY, STOP INCREMENTING!

        • Chris Phoenix
          Chris Phoenix
          June 5, 2017 at 2:51 am | #

          If you play it really slowly, it sounds like a skipping record.

          …See, I’m more dateable than you!

          • Reltzik
            Reltzik
            June 5, 2017 at 8:20 am | #

            ….. I think this makes us LESS dateable.

      • Mandy
        Mandy
        June 5, 2017 at 12:36 am | #

        Well, that was the obvious choice, but now that we’ve seen the time-skip in context, yeah. It’s definitely the most evil part of this strip.

  45. Jhon
    Jhon
    June 5, 2017 at 12:10 am | #

    Dang. I was hoping for Dina/Becky banter.
    But this will do.

  46. Kernanator
    Kernanator
    June 5, 2017 at 12:10 am | #

    I am liking this new Dan-rection.

  47. Blackbird
    Blackbird
    June 5, 2017 at 12:11 am | #

    Us: “Nothing could be more horrific than the Amber-Ryan fight.”

    Willis: “Hold my beer.”

    • jeffepp
      jeffepp
      June 5, 2017 at 12:16 am | #

      Never in our darkest nightmares, did we imagine a uke.

      • MM
        MM
        June 5, 2017 at 12:34 am | #

        His first name isn’t Damnyou for nothing.

      • Andy
        Andy
        June 5, 2017 at 11:49 am | #

        All we need is a SEMME.

        • Spencer
          Spencer
          June 5, 2017 at 2:17 pm | #

          This joke would be funnier if that’s how ukulele was spelled.

          • Amazi-Stool
            Amazi-Stool
            June 5, 2017 at 4:17 pm | #

            Wait until you witness the backstory of the UKULELF!

          • Clif
            Clif
            June 5, 2017 at 4:21 pm | #

            This is English. We can agree to spell it however we want.

            • Orion Fury
              Orion Fury
              June 5, 2017 at 11:01 pm | #

              Wouldn’t it be something else if Willis created a filter to turn SEMMe into ukulele?

    • Schpoonman
      Schpoonman
      June 5, 2017 at 12:44 am | #

      Jesus Christ.

      • Orion Fury
        Orion Fury
        June 5, 2017 at 11:02 pm | #

        I think it’d be ‘wine’ and not ‘beer’ then.

  48. Fart Captor
    Fart Captor
    June 5, 2017 at 12:11 am | #

    All other things aside, I completely approve of Danny annoying Joe by any and all means, and its definitely good that he’s actually focusing on himself and his own needs, not just as Danny The Boyfriend

  49. Daniel Shive
    Daniel Shive
    June 5, 2017 at 12:11 am | #

    I want to say “damn you, Willis”, but really, I welcome a bit of chill.

    • Halpful
      Halpful
      June 5, 2017 at 12:44 am | #

      yeah. It’s a relief to just have a silly fun comic. the last few strips felt like an eternity of dooooooom.

      • Chris Phoenix
        Chris Phoenix
        June 5, 2017 at 2:53 am | #

        Funny you should mention… Dooooooom is the punchline of today’s GWS Chaser.
        http://www.girlswithslingshots.com/comic/gws-chaser-585

    • John
      John
      June 5, 2017 at 4:02 am | #

      I’m suddenly reminded that you still haven’t revealed what’s up with the shadow monster thing lurking in Susan’s room and grabbing hapless immortals.

      • MatthewTheLucky
        MatthewTheLucky
        June 5, 2017 at 11:54 pm | #

        I thought that was Box.

  50. ailorn
    ailorn
    June 5, 2017 at 12:12 am | #

    What happened?? >,<

    • Reltzik
      Reltzik
      June 5, 2017 at 12:24 am | #

      Willis said, “We’re here in the Dumbing of Age comments section, where I’ve secretly replaced the expected and long-desired comeuppance of a deeply-hated villain with a hot, steaming cup of ukulele. Let’s see if my fans notice.”

      • Orion Fury
        Orion Fury
        June 5, 2017 at 11:05 pm | #

        Bark! Bark! Bark! Bark! Bark! Bark! Bark! Bark! Bark! Bark!

  51. Tomas
    Tomas
    June 5, 2017 at 12:13 am | #

    Blah, blah, blah, but for me it was just Wednesday.

    • Gesc
      Gesc
      June 5, 2017 at 2:22 am | #

      Loophole!

    • Orion Fury
      Orion Fury
      June 5, 2017 at 11:05 pm | #

      Wait, I thought someone said it was now Saturday.

      • Tomas
        Tomas
        June 6, 2017 at 12:13 am | #

        Therefore the butchery was Wednesday.

  52. Mada
    Mada
    June 5, 2017 at 12:14 am | #

    So three days after two of Danny’s exes are involved in some sort of appallingly brutal incident involving a knife and a known rapist…

    Danny’s doing this?

    I…did…did the shock addle his brain and that’s why Joe’s concerned?

    • Cephalo the Pod
      Cephalo the Pod
      June 5, 2017 at 12:18 am | #

      You’re assuming either Amber or Dorothy has told anyone.

      • Reltzik
        Reltzik
        June 5, 2017 at 12:25 am | #

        Or that Danny didn’t already spend a couple of days fretting over them and being reassured that they’re both okay.

      • John
        John
        June 5, 2017 at 1:13 am | #

        You’re also assuming that Danny has a brain.

      • JessWitt
        JessWitt
        June 5, 2017 at 3:33 am | #

        I wonder if it’s possible anyone else is privy. Goodness me.

      • Inbar Fink
        Inbar Fink
        June 5, 2017 at 2:05 pm | #

        Or, in another possiblity, maybe Danny had finally given up about telling Joe about his Issues

  53. Jess
    Jess
    June 5, 2017 at 12:14 am | #

    I’M WITH YOU JOE

    College has induced a thorough hatred of ukeleles in my very being.

  54. Tacos
    Tacos
    June 5, 2017 at 12:14 am | #

    You better know how to play the Steven Universe theme on that Danny or else I’ll be disappointed.

    • Emperor Daniel
      Emperor Daniel
      June 5, 2017 at 12:16 am | #

      I bet a lot of people know how to play the Steven Universe theme on a Danny.

  55. Lauralot
    Lauralot
    June 5, 2017 at 12:14 am | #

    Okay, so Danny’s level of calm indicates that Amber hasn’t been arrested/hospitalized/gone on the run now that the police are trying to arrest her for murder or maiming? Or at least Danny’s not aware of it if she has, I guess?

    • motorfirebox
      motorfirebox
      June 5, 2017 at 12:16 am | #

      I dunno, man. He took up the ukelele. That’s a cry for help if I ever heard one.

      • C.T Phipps
        C.T Phipps
        June 5, 2017 at 12:45 am | #

        It’s clearly a cover story for helping Amber and Dorothy dissolve Ryan’s body Breaking Bad style.

      • Jess
        Jess
        June 5, 2017 at 1:37 am | #

        I’M LAUGHING

    • Lauralot
      Lauralot
      June 5, 2017 at 12:18 am | #

      Also Danny’s happy ukulele face makes me happy, which I needed.

    • Spencer
      Spencer
      June 5, 2017 at 3:44 pm | #

      I personally believe that he knows she’s okay, but given their last interaction, where she told him point blank that Danny shouldn’t want to talk to her anymore, maybe he is trying to distance himself from her?

      Of course, it’s Danny, so I doubt he’d be able to distance himself from his feelings for Amber that easily.

  56. Adam
    Adam
    June 5, 2017 at 12:16 am | #

    Danny: “That, and I’m Bisexual.”

    ( Joe raises one eyebrow )

    Danny: “Maybe my next girlfriend should… Be a Boyfriend”

    Joe: “Why do you do this to me? Why can’t you just say ‘I like knockers?’ .

    Danny: ( looks at Joe’s Chest ) “Nice Knockers, Joe”

    Joe: “Too late! Go Play your Ukulele!” ( Joe storms off to showers. )

    • Derek
      Derek
      June 5, 2017 at 12:19 am | #

      Joe didn’t seem to mind Danny’s bisexuality and encouraged Danny to go get himself some dick as I recall.

      • Adam
        Adam
        June 5, 2017 at 8:42 am | #

        I don’t think he’s fully out to him, Joe hasnt dealt with all the feels between them once he does. Joe was suggesting Ethan ( described anonymously ) would make a good catch ( especially as it sounded like Joe ) for someone.

    • JessWitt
      JessWitt
      June 5, 2017 at 3:31 am | #

      lol. That’s great.

      • Adam
        Adam
        June 5, 2017 at 8:43 am | #

        Thx

    • motorfirebox
      motorfirebox
      June 5, 2017 at 11:17 am | #

      I read this last night, and it’s so completely DoA that I forgot it wasn’t the actual strip until now.

      • Adam
        Adam
        June 5, 2017 at 4:47 pm | #

        / Takes A Bow.

        Thx

  57. Reltzik
    Reltzik
    June 5, 2017 at 12:17 am | #

    ….. I just realized.

    Willis is a genius.

    Pure, friggin’ GENIUS.

    ….

    If we kill him, we won’t get to see what happened with Amber and Ryan.

    DAMN UKULELE WILLIS!

    • shammers
      shammers
      June 5, 2017 at 1:01 am | #

      Lmao that was a good one

    • dn3s
      dn3s
      June 5, 2017 at 12:57 pm | #

      there’s a pretty big buffer built up, so we’d still have a pretty good chance.

  58. Bodmans
    Bodmans
    June 5, 2017 at 12:17 am | #

    Damn you Willis

    A 3 day skip is months worth of content

    • Inspector Hound
      Inspector Hound
      June 5, 2017 at 3:54 pm | #

      But then we’ll have flashbacks to the missing three days, and talk about the three days, and by the time it’s over we’ll have spent more months on those three days than on any other three days in DoA history.

      Very clever, Mr. Willis.

  59. Cephalo the Pod
    Cephalo the Pod
    June 5, 2017 at 12:17 am | #

    Funny thing is, this suddenly emergent passion for music is his first real development as a character that doesn’t involve a relationship with someone else.

    Or, at least, it could be, depending on how seriously this strip is taken.

  60. AY
    AY
    June 5, 2017 at 12:17 am | #

    (o u o` what the fuck, willis

    • AY
      AY
      June 5, 2017 at 12:20 am | #

      (okay, to be perfectly honest, I think this is my new fav page)

  61. My1DigitIQ
    My1DigitIQ
    June 5, 2017 at 12:17 am | #

    3 day timeskip? Thats like 2 months of comics right there.

  62. Mackabre
    Mackabre
    June 5, 2017 at 12:17 am | #

    I don’t agree with Joe often, but this one time we are in perfect alignment.

    NO!

  63. Ash_Ketchup
    Ash_Ketchup
    June 5, 2017 at 12:19 am | #

    A TIME SKIP?!!?!?!?

    • C.T Phipps
      C.T Phipps
      June 5, 2017 at 12:22 am | #

      3 days is like 3 years in Real Time. It’s almost time for President Robin’s term to end.

      • John
        John
        June 5, 2017 at 1:17 am | #

        Wait, wait… can we do this the other way around? Have Willis post a whole mess of DoA strips all at once and skip the next 3.5 years of real time?

        • Opus the Poet
          Opus the Poet
          June 5, 2017 at 2:13 am | #

          What and miss Trump and the rest getting offed in a mass firing squad?

  64. Archivist
    Archivist
    June 5, 2017 at 12:19 am | #

    Thank you for these snark idiots, Willis.

  65. C.T Phipps
    C.T Phipps
    June 5, 2017 at 12:21 am | #

    I misquote the DIXIE CHICKS song “Goodbye Earl.”

    “It turns out Ryan was a missing person that nobody missed at all.”

  66. newllend(henryvolt)
    newllend(henryvolt)
    June 5, 2017 at 12:21 am | #

    Learn play a real fucking instrument, like a saxophone or a guitar.

    • John
      John
      June 5, 2017 at 1:18 am | #

      Or the triangle! Danny seems like a triangle player.

      • Tacos
        Tacos
        June 5, 2017 at 6:12 pm | #

        Needs more cowbell.

    • Needfuldoer
      Needfuldoer
      June 5, 2017 at 2:38 am | #

      Somebody learning how to play can make far more horrible sounds with a Stratocaster than a ukelele.

  67. Heinousactszx
    Heinousactszx
    June 5, 2017 at 12:22 am | #

    Who would have thought that we were going to jump from a knife fight into something TRULY TERRIFYING?

  68. caesaria82
    caesaria82
    June 5, 2017 at 12:23 am | #

    I actually love the ukulele for Danny, that is so on brand lmao. It’s such a milquetoast white boy thing to do. Bless you, my only mildly problematic fave.

    • C.T Phipps
      C.T Phipps
      June 5, 2017 at 12:28 am | #

      I really was hoping Danny could not get lamer–but it seems there is no end to his infinite lameness.

  69. Rukduk
    Rukduk
    June 5, 2017 at 12:23 am | #

    Well, at least it’s not a banjo. Banjos make everything worse. Except that one video game that I only 50% of the title of.
    …
    Also, I’m willing to bet Danny would have bought an actual guitar instead if he had the money.

    • Emperor Daniel
      Emperor Daniel
      June 5, 2017 at 12:31 am | #

      Banjos make everything worse? Say that to THE GOD OF PUPPETS WHY DON’T YOU

      • Dave
        Dave
        June 5, 2017 at 12:45 am | #

        OK, danny worship giggles now

    • Victor Riley
      Victor Riley
      June 5, 2017 at 12:33 am | #

      Steve Martin. Your argument is invalid. Good day, sir.

    • Lingo
      Lingo
      June 5, 2017 at 12:52 am | #

      Man, imagine if it were a bongo. Think of all the stupid comments.

      • Opus the Poet
        Opus the Poet
        June 5, 2017 at 2:15 am | #

        “Bongos” is the name of the instrument. They only come in pairs.

    • rectilinearpropagation
      rectilinearpropagation
      June 5, 2017 at 1:02 am | #

      “Except that one video game that I only 50% of the title of.”

      For some reason I immediately thought of The Last of Us and I’m pretty sure my brain is very wrong on this.

  70. Yotomoe
    Yotomoe
    June 5, 2017 at 12:25 am | #

    I ALSO play the ukulele.
    I’m perfect at it, just like I am at everything.

    • Reltzik
      Reltzik
      June 5, 2017 at 12:27 am | #

      Except picking musical instruments. 😛

      • Reltzik
        Reltzik
        June 5, 2017 at 12:36 am | #

        ….. okay, THAT pun was unintentional.

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        June 5, 2017 at 12:51 am | #

        ARE you implying The Ukulele, Guitar and Trombone are bad choices?

        • Reltzik
          Reltzik
          June 5, 2017 at 12:55 am | #

          I’m not implying that the guitar and trombone are bad choices, no.

          • Deanatay
            Deanatay
            June 5, 2017 at 9:56 am | #

            Besides, how would you pick a trombone? There’s no strings!

            • Reltzik
              Reltzik
              June 5, 2017 at 10:45 am | #

              Technically, you’re right, but I’m willing to let it slide.

              • AY
                AY
                June 5, 2017 at 11:48 am | #

                *clap clap*

  71. Tyramisu
    Tyramisu
    June 5, 2017 at 12:25 am | #

    We have a request for an Exterminatus because of a time skip, My Lady.

    Time skips are Heretical. Request GRANTED!

    • Rukduk
      Rukduk
      June 5, 2017 at 3:18 pm | #

      See, this is why no one likes the Inquisition and the only reason to play an Imperium of Man faction is because the Imperial Guard have the Baneblade and the combined WW2 strategis combined, the Skitarri are cool cyborgs, the Sisters of Battle are always the underdog, and the Salamanders are the only Space Marines who are actually nice to people, aside from occasionally the Blood Angels and Blood Ravens. Other than those, Tau is where it’s at. For the Greater Good!!!

  72. Derek
    Derek
    June 5, 2017 at 12:26 am | #

    A time skip! Willis’s stand is far more powerful than I could’ve ever imagined…

    • AGV
      AGV
      June 5, 2017 at 2:55 am | #

      The next thing you’ll say is: “Damn you, Willis!”

      • Derek
        Derek
        June 5, 2017 at 7:38 pm | #

        By what sorcery do you read my mind and predict my actions so accurately?!?

  73. Absorbingman
    Absorbingman
    June 5, 2017 at 12:26 am | #

    Meanwhile outside the dorm, Amber is still stabbing away at not-Ryan’s long dead corpse.

    • Emperor Daniel
      Emperor Daniel
      June 5, 2017 at 12:27 am | #

      His name is still Ryan, it’s just his middle name. Which is why Dorothy wasn’t able to find it by searching in the directory.

  74. zoelogical
    zoelogical
    June 5, 2017 at 12:27 am | #

    this feels like a dream. i can’t remember danny ever smiling like that, or being that emotionally grounded

  75. Jhon
    Jhon
    June 5, 2017 at 12:28 am | #

    Dorothy was really upset about something.
    But she’s OK now.

  76. C.T Phipps
    C.T Phipps
    June 5, 2017 at 12:29 am | #

    I now have the weird idea for an R-rated black comedy about Dorothy helping Amber dispose of the body in Galasso’s pizza ovens.

    “HOW TO GET AWAY WITH SELF-DEFENSE.”

  77. Reltzik
    Reltzik
    June 5, 2017 at 12:30 am | #

    Okay, enough of bashing on the ukulele. (From me. You folks feel free to continue on.)

    Also, enough from you, Joe. You don’t get to veto Danny’s likes and dislikes. At best, ask him to not practice while you’re in the room together.

    While you’re at it, shitcan that joke you’re planning about Danny having the smallest phallic instrument ever.

    • vlademir1
      vlademir1
      June 5, 2017 at 3:24 am | #

      Nah, he should make that joke, that way we’d get to watch as Danny replies, “Well, ya see Joe, I don’t have anything to compensate for.”

      • Reltzik
        Reltzik
        June 5, 2017 at 8:22 am | #

        Danny doesn’t really do snappy comebacks.

  78. Sapphic-Sunshine
    Sapphic-Sunshine
    June 5, 2017 at 12:30 am | #

    I want to laugh, but spending my newfound free time learning to play the ukulele is exactly what I did following my breakup lol

  79. Bicycle Bill
    Bicycle Bill
    June 5, 2017 at 12:31 am | #

    Since three days have passed and Joe and Danny are talking about ukuleles rather than the dead (or near-dead) body found outside the dorm doors, we can safely assume that Amber did not commit murder, manslaughter, or grievous bodily harm and that Ryan was able to leave under his own power.

    • Emperor Daniel
      Emperor Daniel
      June 5, 2017 at 1:27 am | #

      Would they be talking about that first thing in the morning, three days after it happened, though?

  80. Andy
    Andy
    June 5, 2017 at 12:32 am | #

    Half an hour after posting, 160 comments, and no one is talking about the fact that Danny has no girlfriend and just spent 3 days getting to know himself? Fine, I guess I’ll have to start that one.

    …so why isn’t his arm super bulked up?

    • Reltzik
      Reltzik
      June 5, 2017 at 12:33 am | #

      It looks like he’s been focused on necking.

      • Fart Captor
        Fart Captor
        June 5, 2017 at 1:02 am | #

        *slow clap*

    • Cephalo the Pod
      Cephalo the Pod
      June 5, 2017 at 1:11 am | #

      Hey, I DID make a post about how this is Danny’s first development as a character that doesn’t involve a relationship.

  81. Victor Riley
    Victor Riley
    June 5, 2017 at 12:32 am | #

    I want a ukulele.

    • Pl0x
      Pl0x
      June 5, 2017 at 12:57 am | #

      Me too. So many people are hating on it. There’s nothing wrong with ukuleles.

  82. Phantom
    Phantom
    June 5, 2017 at 12:33 am | #

    I can only picture Joe saying this after saying No!
    “None of that! Shame on you!”

    • rectilinearpropagation
      rectilinearpropagation
      June 5, 2017 at 1:00 am | #

      Tee hee. Now the only question is which other character ends up saying that exact line to him again later.

  83. Kingmonster
    Kingmonster
    June 5, 2017 at 12:35 am | #

    NOOOOOOOOOOO!!! TIME SKIP!!!

    DARN IT, WILLLLIIIIIIIIIIIS!!!

  84. Leorale
    Leorale
    June 5, 2017 at 12:36 am | #

    Aw, so many people dislike ukuleles! But they’re so happy.
    For me it’s like DoA!Danny is making up for his previous incarnation by being more likeable every strip. He’s bi, he spits on Blaine, he plays a cheerful novelty guitar, it’s darling.

  85. Keulan
    Keulan
    June 5, 2017 at 12:36 am | #

    This is quite the mood whiplash from the previous strip. Also, kinda surprised that the 4th panel didn’t end up being a joke about masturbation or something.

    • Reltzik
      Reltzik
      June 5, 2017 at 12:37 am | #

      From Willis’s twitter feed:

      “look it’s not tonal whiplash if it’s the first strip of a new storyline”

      • Cephalo the Pod
        Cephalo the Pod
        June 5, 2017 at 1:09 am | #

        If this were a TV/web series, this could totally be the beginning of a new episode, even after the dramatic end we just had

    • Amazi-Stool
      Amazi-Stool
      June 5, 2017 at 4:43 pm | #

      How is “I’m about (…) playing the ukulele” not a joke about masturbation?

  86. Cephalo the Pod
    Cephalo the Pod
    June 5, 2017 at 12:37 am | #

    People freaking out over a time skip as if moving on to just the next morning would have been any better.

    • Reltzik
      Reltzik
      June 5, 2017 at 12:41 am | #

      No! We can’t skip even one second! We must stay frozen in that moment forever!

      • Emperor Daniel
        Emperor Daniel
        June 5, 2017 at 12:43 am | #

        “How does a moment last forever?”

        • Reltzik
          Reltzik
          June 5, 2017 at 12:56 am | #

          Well, you need time to apply a force to divert it, and you can’t have that time if the moment lasts forever.

          In short, it just needs to have momentum.

    • Cephalo the Pod
      Cephalo the Pod
      June 5, 2017 at 1:19 am | #

      In fact, I’m pretty sure this time skip is simply a means to give everyone the day off so that big plot developments can happen.

  87. L!ghtn!ng
    L!ghtn!ng
    June 5, 2017 at 12:41 am | #

    Damn you, Willis!!

  88. C.T Phipps
    C.T Phipps
    June 5, 2017 at 12:44 am | #

    So, Amber and Dorothy hid the body. Awesome.

    • zoelogical
      zoelogical
      June 5, 2017 at 12:49 am | #

      road trip!!!!

    • Reltzik
      Reltzik
      June 5, 2017 at 12:57 am | #

      “He was a self-centered, self-entitled prick with no real core. So he gets a shallow grave without any depth.”

      • Kingmonster
        Kingmonster
        June 5, 2017 at 2:53 am | #

        I feel wrong, but I REALLY LIKE THIS COMMENT.

        • Valerie
          Valerie
          June 5, 2017 at 3:13 pm | #

          I’m as wrong as you, then.

  89. kater
    kater
    June 5, 2017 at 12:45 am | #

    Good for Danny!

  90. Kitschensyngk
    Kitschensyngk
    June 5, 2017 at 12:50 am | #

    But I’ve heard there’s big money to be made making cheap, happy, upbeat stock music to use in commercials for Windex and Lysol and prepackaged family dinners and dating sites and home improvement stores!

  91. AutobotDen
    AutobotDen
    June 5, 2017 at 12:50 am | #

    I’m not even coordinated enough to play a normal-sized guitar. Props to Danny. Also, Joe, kindly stfu.

  92. Lingo
    Lingo
    June 5, 2017 at 12:55 am | #

    Hmm I just noticed the name of this storyline. Might we have a story more focused on Joe for once?

    • Lingo
      Lingo
      June 5, 2017 at 12:56 am | #

      Also, Joe calls Danny “Li’l Buddy”? Now I can’t help thinking they’re based off of Gilligan and the Skipper.

      • Minder
        Minder
        June 5, 2017 at 1:32 am | #

        Willis has mentioned a few times there’s a lot of Joe and Danny in this story. Also, Joe thinks of Danny as an annoying and immature / a kid for not spending his time focused on sex, which funnily enough is a wrong assessment because Danny’s been forced to mature at a breakneck pace up to keep up with the complications in his life and Joe is the actual dumb kid who needs some handholding to adulthood.

        • Spencer
          Spencer
          June 5, 2017 at 2:23 pm | #

          I know there’s a lot of Joe in this story, but where did he say there’d be a lot of Danny?

          • Minder
            Minder
            June 5, 2017 at 6:56 pm | #

            I honestly don’t remember, coulda been twitter or tumblr but probably twitter

  93. Zatar
    Zatar
    June 5, 2017 at 12:57 am | #

    I legitimately can’t tell if Danny is deliberately annoying Joe or not.

    • Bagge
      Bagge
      June 5, 2017 at 2:48 am | #

      Me neither. I’m intrigued and confused.

  94. rectilinearpropagation
    rectilinearpropagation
    June 5, 2017 at 12:57 am | #

    Nothing wrong with ukulele when utilized properly: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sxEuq32tI5s

    • Needfuldoer
      Needfuldoer
      June 5, 2017 at 2:50 am | #

      How can they possibly be utilized properly when they’re not on fire?

  95. Aprion
    Aprion
    June 5, 2017 at 1:02 am | #

    considering how chill these two are, either they have no fucking clue what went down, or what we were led to believe wasn’t anything serious. either way the author is being a troll.

  96. ABC123
    ABC123
    June 5, 2017 at 1:04 am | #

    A Joe-centered storyline for once? Maybe my DannyxEthan ship finally sailing? Amber guest stars in an OITNB episode? I am intrigued. And annoyed. Because honestly Will, a cliffhanger that frigging big. The hate is winning in my one-sided love-hate relationship with you.

  97. Cephalo the Pod
    Cephalo the Pod
    June 5, 2017 at 1:08 am | #

    Wait…Do any of these characters go to clubs?!

    I don’t know how it works at Indiana University, but at the University of Western Ontario, signing up for clubs happens during, like, the second or third week of the year.

    I get that Amber’s a shut-in, Bilie got into journalism, and Dorothy keeps herself busy with lots of other stuff, but…did no school clubs pique the interest of Joyce? Of Walky? Ethan? Danny?

    Seems weird to me that so many of these characters don’t seem to have any extracirricular interests.

    • Reltzik
      Reltzik
      June 5, 2017 at 1:19 am | #

      Sarah’s got a club.

      ….. *checks*

      … no, wait, that’s a bat.

      • Delicious Taffy
        Delicious Taffy
        June 5, 2017 at 1:38 am | #

        She can say it’s a bat all she wants. I’ve read the Player’s Handbook, and that’s definitely just a re-flavored club.

        • Anowan
          Anowan
          June 5, 2017 at 3:20 am | #

          Are we sure it wasn’t a phone though

          • Delicious Taffy
            Delicious Taffy
            June 5, 2017 at 4:24 am | #

            Don’t be ridiculous.

            Phones don’t have the Versatile keyword.

          • Delicious Taffy
            Delicious Taffy
            June 5, 2017 at 8:58 am | #

            I mean, I know a phone when I see one.

            • Reltzik
              Reltzik
              June 5, 2017 at 9:57 am | #

              But do you know a phone when you see something else?

            • Valerie
              Valerie
              June 5, 2017 at 3:12 pm | #

              I love that you’re so good humored. A lot of people would probably be all mad, but you’re here making jokes and shit. It’s awesome. A+.

              • Rukduk
                Rukduk
                June 5, 2017 at 3:25 pm | #

                In my experience there are three types of DoA commenters. The really insightful ones that occasionally throw out some really good humor and we all appreciate as a result like Cerberus, the really silly ones who can be serious when required like Reltzik or SgtWadeyWilsom, and the good humored hybrid between the two like Delicious Taffy. No idea where I fit into on that scale.
                …
                There’s also the ones that Willis blocks, but I don’t really count those.

                • Orion Fury
                  Orion Fury
                  June 5, 2017 at 11:13 pm | #

                  Um, sorry, little lost here. Phones? New filter, or inside joke?

                • Reltzik
                  Reltzik
                  June 5, 2017 at 11:50 pm | #

                  Delicious Taffy made about twelve dozen thousand posts a few comics back insisting that Ryan was holding a phone, not a knife. He even went so far as to say that if it WAS a knife, he’d change his grav to something embarrassing for a week, whatever we suggested.

                  The overwhelming suggestion was a grav of the knife itself.

                  He’s been a good sport of it.

    • rectilinearpropagation
      rectilinearpropagation
      June 5, 2017 at 1:21 am | #

      What percentage of the college student body ends up joining school clubs though? 30%?

      Whatever the number, I’d expect it to be lower for freshman since some of them are likely to want to find out what their academic load is like before making non-academic commitments.

      • DinaWho
        DinaWho
        June 5, 2017 at 1:34 am | #

        Well in my case it was more like ‘sign up for like five different clubs and then never go to any of them, then proceed to get super involved in an activity that wasn’t even on your radar when picking clubs was a thing’.

    • Doom Shepherd
      Doom Shepherd
      June 5, 2017 at 8:03 am | #

      Feh. I didn’t join any clubs until my senior year. Being asocial will do that to you. What their excuse is, I don’t know, but that’s mine.

    • Lingo
      Lingo
      June 6, 2017 at 12:29 am | #

      I’d be shocked if Joe is NOT a member of some fraternity.

  98. rectilinearpropagation
    rectilinearpropagation
    June 5, 2017 at 1:16 am | #

    You know, after some thought, the time skip makes sense.

    We saw the how ordeal with Becky’s dad because we didn’t know how that was going to pan out.

    We don’t need to spend weeks watching Amber curb stomp Ryan and the very immediate aftermath. We saw what we needed to see which was 1) what Amber is like when it’s her being violent instead of Amazi-Girl and 2) Ryan lost the fight super hard. Instead of entire comics consisting entirely of Amber and Dorothy panicking and going “oh no, what now” we can skip to the what now part.

    I know in stories you’re supposed to show, don’t tell but sometimes summing up is OK. I don’t want to see the entirety of Wooden Rod’s drive to work.

    Also, as someone’s already pointed out, getting a break from the glum is nice.

    • Minder
      Minder
      June 5, 2017 at 1:35 am | #

      Yep! It’s hard because we’re in a serial webcomic but the story would be worse if we’d just stayed on Ryan and Amber / Dorothy to just drag on the horror and psychological wringing instead of being allowed to infer the details of it later at a safer distance

      • Needfuldoer
        Needfuldoer
        June 5, 2017 at 2:54 am | #

        But think of the spectacle! The gory, cathartic spectacle!

        • Clif
          Clif
          June 5, 2017 at 4:33 pm | #

          You can construct it in your mind.

  99. BP
    BP
    June 5, 2017 at 1:21 am | #

    Don’t knock it ’til you try it, Joe! Mine was my best Christmas present last year (its name is Tiny Tim).

  100. Minder
    Minder
    June 5, 2017 at 1:22 am | #

    this is the best strip of all time and anybody that’s upset this strip is Joe and Danny talking about the ukulele is OBJECTIVELY WRONG.

  101. Arianod
    Arianod
    June 5, 2017 at 1:25 am | #

    Ooh, a cut to a different scene º3º Who’d have guessed?

  102. Delicious Taffy
    Delicious Taffy
    June 5, 2017 at 1:36 am | #

    Joe might change his mind if Danny started playing this.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ho1LgF8ys-c

  103. AgentKeen
    AgentKeen
    June 5, 2017 at 1:38 am | #

    [‘Babe’ mouse chorus’]: Three Days Later🎵

    • rectilinearpropagation
      rectilinearpropagation
      June 5, 2017 at 1:54 am | #

      OMG, you just reminded me of that “Make a Day for You” song!

      🙂

  104. Bagge
    Bagge
    June 5, 2017 at 1:41 am | #

    The ukulele is an euphimism for his penis.

    • JessWitt
      JessWitt
      June 5, 2017 at 3:29 am | #

      I was thinking more of his testicles.

    • Remmington Steele
      Remmington Steele
      June 5, 2017 at 4:53 pm | #

      That’s usually the pink trombone!

  105. LooksLikeDaniel
    LooksLikeDaniel
    June 5, 2017 at 1:53 am | #

    SON. GET A MANDOLIN.

    • Dara
      Dara
      June 5, 2017 at 3:26 am | #

      THANK YOU.

    • Rukduk
      Rukduk
      June 5, 2017 at 3:26 pm | #

      I love the Mandolin! Seriously, such a good instrument.

  106. A Scientist
    A Scientist
    June 5, 2017 at 1:58 am | #

    Strumming of Age, in which we find Danny is actually Chris Thile.

    • A Scientist
      A Scientist
      June 5, 2017 at 1:58 am | #

      Wait, no, that’s a mandolin. Never mind.

      • Bicycle Bill
        Bicycle Bill
        June 5, 2017 at 10:45 am | #

        Listen to someone like Peter Ostroushko play a mandolin.  Mandolins were not meant to be ‘strummed’, and anyone who does so and still claims to be a mandolin player is not to be trusted.

    • Chris Phoenix
      Chris Phoenix
      June 5, 2017 at 3:02 am | #

      Unless Danny gets pretty good at the uke, pretty fast, we might have Shunning of Age.

  107. Saki
    Saki
    June 5, 2017 at 2:17 am | #

    Three days later?! ARE YOU KIDDING ME? THREE. DAY. LATER???!!!!

    Ahem. Well if this is just three days later either these boys have not heard about what happened (doubtful? word travels fast on campus) or things aren’t that bad? probably? hopefully?

    Also tbh Danny’s “quite the opposite” made me think “ah yes instead of a girlfriend it’s a boyfriend this time” and, like, I knew that wasn’t gonna be it, but I was still lowkey disappointed.

    • Saki
      Saki
      June 5, 2017 at 2:22 am | #

      (okay but for serious the change to something ligther is actually very welcome, the last few strips had me really tense)

  108. BenRG
    BenRG
    June 5, 2017 at 2:21 am | #

    Sometimes, I genuinely empathise with Joe. They’re rare occasions but they happen. This is one of those occasions!

  109. xtravisage
    xtravisage
    June 5, 2017 at 2:36 am | #

    Damn it, Three days!? That’s like, at least 5 years of content you’ve left out.

    • ValdVin
      ValdVin
      June 5, 2017 at 8:40 am | #

      I’m older than Willis, and I guess most of the readers.

      Without timeskips like this, some fans may not live to see these kids graduate!

      • Amazi-Stool
        Amazi-Stool
        June 5, 2017 at 4:57 pm | #

        Graduate? You hope for graduation?

        It’s unlikely that we ever see them completing first year!

    • Remmington Steele
      Remmington Steele
      June 5, 2017 at 4:52 pm | #

      and 3 years of flashbacks.

  110. brasca1
    brasca1
    June 5, 2017 at 2:43 am | #

    Ukuleles are for the lazy. Now accordions and bagpipes are for those who want to commit to finding themselves while tormenting everyone around them. Unless Danny is completely disconnected I’m going to assume nothing catastrophic happened to Amber.

    • Remmington Steele
      Remmington Steele
      June 5, 2017 at 3:19 am | #

      Trombone is also good for that.

    • Vulcanodon
      Vulcanodon
      June 5, 2017 at 11:59 am | #

      One of our neighbor’s kids plays the bagpipes, and he’s pretty good at it. The sweet, sweet sound of nonconformity…

      • Rukduk
        Rukduk
        June 5, 2017 at 3:28 pm | #

        Well, there’s a good reason they’re used for military funerals. A skilled bagpipe player can make some of the most somber music around. Or some of the most exciting marching music. Highland Regiments exist for a reason.

      • Remmington Steele
        Remmington Steele
        June 5, 2017 at 4:51 pm | #

        +1

        I love the sound of bagpipes.

  111. NinjaNick
    NinjaNick
    June 5, 2017 at 2:46 am | #

    After a tension-filled previous story arc, an ukelele sounds like a peaceful instrument. Danny needs to find some bandmates.

    • Amazi-Stool
      Amazi-Stool
      June 5, 2017 at 5:02 pm | #

      You’ll find some suggestions here!

  112. acher4
    acher4
    June 5, 2017 at 2:48 am | #

    Ohhhh ffffffor crying out loud!
    That’s so mean Willis!
    Meaaaaaannnnnnnn!

    😛

  113. podian
    podian
    June 5, 2017 at 2:54 am | #

    I don’t know whether to love or hate Willis for this.

    Just… wow.

  114. Walstafa
    Walstafa
    June 5, 2017 at 3:01 am | #

    Next thing you know he’ll be wearing a fedora.

    • JessWitt
      JessWitt
      June 5, 2017 at 3:27 am | #

      And he won’t pull it off. Well, not with that hoodie I mean.

  115. Bane
    Bane
    June 5, 2017 at 3:03 am | #

    Jesus, I am WAY to familiar with this. I bought one after I graduated high school, because “Hmmm, I can’t afford a tuba, but I wanna sing the deep, soulful lyrics I can’t come up with while I play, and everyone already plays guitar.”

    $50 and sever people in my dorm shouting varying forms of “SHUT THE FUCK UP, NOBODY LIKES YOUR MUSIC” later, I left my cheapulele in the under my bed til the end of the year.

  116. some guy
    some guy
    June 5, 2017 at 3:04 am | #

    Dammit Willis you’ve made me even more invested to know if ryan is dead now that you’ve pulled the “3 days later” thing and goddammit it worked amazingly(pun unintended)

  117. CianM1301
    CianM1301
    June 5, 2017 at 3:11 am | #

    “The ‘Do List”? Will we be seeing a Joe-centred storyline? I hope so.

    • JessWitt
      JessWitt
      June 5, 2017 at 3:26 am | #

      He could use a bit more dimensionality.

    • Galuna
      Galuna
      June 5, 2017 at 9:23 am | #

      Woah, it’s an OC Emerl.

      • CianM1301
        CianM1301
        June 5, 2017 at 3:33 pm | #

        I’m glad someone else remembers Emerl, because Sonic Team sure as hell doesn’t.

    • Spencer
      Spencer
      June 5, 2017 at 2:16 pm | #

      According to Willis’ twitter he shows up in 30 strips of this storyline, approximately a third.

  118. Dara
    Dara
    June 5, 2017 at 3:27 am | #

    “Where’s the lil’ body lil’ buddy?”

  119. AGV
    AGV
    June 5, 2017 at 3:30 am | #

    What a twist

  120. George_V
    George_V
    June 5, 2017 at 3:43 am | #

    Next strip: Amber is still busy mutilating Ryan’s body.

    • Valerie
      Valerie
      June 5, 2017 at 3:08 pm | #

      I’m totally down with Amber torturing a rapist for three days straight.

  121. phildog
    phildog
    June 5, 2017 at 3:45 am | #

    Oh come on man, what the hell dude?

  122. Pic of Ice
    Pic of Ice
    June 5, 2017 at 3:46 am | #

    My guess, is that Ryan aint dead, but Amber marked him so that all can read the kind of person he is.

    Inglorious Bastards style.

    Or, took away his weapon.

    BOTH of them.

    Im good with either, really.

    • Danni
      Danni
      June 5, 2017 at 4:43 am | #

      or girl with the dragon tattoo style?

    • TomHCinMI
      TomHCinMI
      June 5, 2017 at 10:48 am | #

      “Sin City” reference!

  123. Eldritch Gentleman
    Eldritch Gentleman
    June 5, 2017 at 3:48 am | #

    Suckered by Willis we got I see…

  124. All mankind
    All mankind
    June 5, 2017 at 4:12 am | #

    [Amanda Palmer’s Ukulele Anthem plays now]

  125. Remmington Steele
    Remmington Steele
    June 5, 2017 at 4:41 am | #

    Mornin’ Willis.

    Damn you.

  126. Martin Smith
    Martin Smith
    June 5, 2017 at 4:44 am | #

    No court would convict you, Joe.

  127. Neil Himself
    Neil Himself
    June 5, 2017 at 4:50 am | #

    “Anyway, here’s Wonderwall.”

  128. Remmington Steele
    Remmington Steele
    June 5, 2017 at 4:51 am | #

    Writing an atonal piece for accordion, viola and ukulele might just about piss every off;-j

    • BenRG
      BenRG
      June 5, 2017 at 6:59 am | #

      That could be a nicely artistic way of saying ‘screw you’ to everyone. Do stuff everyone hates then pass it off as ‘fine art’ and force everyone to think that they like it. I’m pretty sure that a lot of modern artists use this basic battle plan.

      • davidbreslin101
        davidbreslin101
        June 5, 2017 at 8:34 am | #

        I have a theory that Modernism happened when a group of representatives from all the Serious Arts had a meeting. “In this new century, improvements in education and an increase in disposable income means that our audience is larger than ever! Now…. how can we get rid of all these frightful oiks?”

      • Remmington Steele
        Remmington Steele
        June 5, 2017 at 4:50 pm | #

        Just arseholes like you. Have fun!

  129. DarkoNeko
    DarkoNeko
    June 5, 2017 at 5:43 am | #

    You can make beautiful things with an ukulele.
    Well, other people can. not Danny.

  130. Ashonai
    Ashonai
    June 5, 2017 at 6:49 am | #

    NO

  131. Li
    Li
    June 5, 2017 at 7:10 am | #

    Probably the only person here who’s relieved to get a break from the drama. (Although I’m hoping the fact Danny doesn’t seem upset is a good sign nothing TOO terrible happened with Amber)

    Anyway, I love Danny. He just whapped that ukele out from nowhere. He’s the best.

  132. IllogicalBobcat
    IllogicalBobcat
    June 5, 2017 at 7:18 am | #

    For once no one is yelling at Joe.

  133. Andrew_C
    Andrew_C
    June 5, 2017 at 7:33 am | #

    I feel it would be appropriate to link to “The Most Unwanted Song” by Komar & Malamid, but I don’t know how to do links on this site so just google it.

  134. Callid13
    Callid13
    June 5, 2017 at 7:34 am | #

    And tomorrow, we jump back with a “three days earlier”. Right? RIGHT?

  135. Inbar Fink
    Inbar Fink
    June 5, 2017 at 7:35 am | #

    Danny happy with a ukulele = good, happy, pure

  136. ArbiterSands
    ArbiterSands
    June 5, 2017 at 7:38 am | #

    Dat tone shift tho

  137. Vulcanodon
    Vulcanodon
    June 5, 2017 at 7:44 am | #

    *Ukulele plays, Danny imitates Kermit T Frog*
    “Why are there so many
    songs about rainbows?
    And what’s on the oooother side?…”

    • Galuna
      Galuna
      June 5, 2017 at 9:22 am | #

      LEARN A NEW SONG!

      • Scar Man!!!
        Scar Man!!!
        June 5, 2017 at 12:30 pm | #

        but’s it’s the best song ever!

  138. Dex
    Dex
    June 5, 2017 at 8:41 am | #

    Judge“This is the second knife murder is less than a week on campus! What is going on over there? How do you explain yourself, young man?”

    Joe “Well, you see, your Honor, Danny started playing the ukulele…”

    Judge“Ah, say no more. Case dismissed!”

  139. JasonAW3
    JasonAW3
    June 5, 2017 at 8:55 am | #

    Willis, you are an evil cuss!

    Well, guess I’ll just have to wait PATIENTLY for what happens with Amber, Dorothy and the late Ryan….

  140. Sam
    Sam
    June 5, 2017 at 9:01 am | #

    Soon, the ukulele will dump Danny and we will right back where we started.

  141. JBento
    JBento
    June 5, 2017 at 9:21 am | #

    Don’t worry, Joe – soon, Danny is going to play the ukulele on the Steps of Break-Up (TM), and the ukulele is going to dump him.

    Also: Willis made a megapost of the last few strips in one of his tumblers, and Ryan is tagged as “druggo mcstabbed,” which made me genuinely chuckle (I’m easily amused. Sue me).

  142. Deanatay
    Deanatay
    June 5, 2017 at 10:01 am | #

    Danny is found dead the next day, smothered in his own blue bedsheets, with a ukelele sticking out of his butt.

    In the wake of the Ryan Massacre, the newspapers don’t even notice.

  143. Spencer
    Spencer
    June 5, 2017 at 10:34 am | #

    If something had happened to Amber Danny would probably be a nervous wreck, so maybe that’s a good sign?

  144. TomHCinMI
    TomHCinMI
    June 5, 2017 at 10:47 am | #

    We know Amber got “Ryan”‘s blood on that knifeblade, but we don’t know where she cut him, nor how deeply, nor whether it was a stab or a slice.

    • Guairdean Beatha
      Guairdean Beatha
      June 5, 2017 at 4:25 pm | #

      I’m waiting for either Amber, Amazi-Girl, or someone completely new to that body to show up with his scalp tied to her belt.

  145. Sarpiedon
    Sarpiedon
    June 5, 2017 at 10:57 am | #

    Why do I get the feeling that Dumbiverse Joe is going to end up with AIDS?

    • Amias
      Amias
      June 5, 2017 at 10:15 pm | #

      I dunno, he does seem pretty dedicated to using condoms. They’re a good safeguard.

  146. Tenchan
    Tenchan
    June 5, 2017 at 11:03 am | #

    Danny is evolving!!!

    • JBento
      JBento
      June 5, 2017 at 12:04 pm | #

      Danny has evolved into Ukulelemon!

  147. 3oranges
    3oranges
    June 5, 2017 at 11:15 am | #

    Aw yeah now the plot is finally moving. 😀

    • Orion Fury
      Orion Fury
      June 5, 2017 at 11:17 pm | #

      So it hasn’t been moving for the last few days?

  148. Guairdean Beatha
    Guairdean Beatha
    June 5, 2017 at 11:17 am | #

    This is intriguing. Is he really interested in the ukulele, or is he secretly getting a head start on Nintendo’s upcoming release of “Ukulele Hero, Nirvana Edition”?

    • DonDueed
      DonDueed
      June 5, 2017 at 1:37 pm | #

      Obviously, the Amber / notRyan Incident has driven Danny totally insane.

  149. Scar Man!!!
    Scar Man!!!
    June 5, 2017 at 12:29 pm | #

    Fucking hell, Willis!

  150. Cerberus
    Cerberus
    June 5, 2017 at 12:30 pm | #

    Comic Reactions:

    Previous comic: That was what I ended up needing to self-care over. I’m so nervous and anxious for Amber and seeing Amber possibly very likely doing the thing that I spent my whole young DID life terrified I would do with exactly the same look from onlookers as Dorothy gives still haunts a lot.

    It’s an amazing piece of storytelling, though, just… intense and breaking my little DID heart. Like, I don’t even blame her fighting back or taking Ryan to the cleaners, just the psychic and legal fallout for Amber is likely to be so high as it’ll feel like yet another confirmation that the Amber alter is dangerous and needs to be constrained and locked up for everyone’s safety.

    This comic: On that note, damn you Willis, you are history’s greatest monster for leaving that on a long cliffhanger.

    Panels 1-2: Okay, I’ve been super hard on Joe, so I want to extra highlight how awesome and important a growth moment this is. Like, all this comic in total, he’s done everything he can to avoid emotionally checking in with Danny and create a wall of “don’t talk to me about life stuff”.

    But he’s recognizing how alienating that was and how it was pushing away his best friend and so he’s taking the opportunity to check in, even though it was highly likely that he’d be dealing with lots of feelings from Danny.

    Like, it’s an important growth moment and may be a sign that he’s starting to loosen some of the trappings he thinks are necessary to be a man.

    Panel 3: Good on you, Danny. That’s really really important and will help your next relationship (because you are very very alloromantic and will be in one eventually) be a lot lot healthier.

    Panel 4: Oh my Bob, Danny is every queer HS freshman at my school (they take turns passing around a ukulele and trying to play Steven Universe songs). So I guess intentionally or unintentionally, he’s fully embracing his newly discovered queerness. Next step is obsessing about Overwatch.

    • Spencer
      Spencer
      June 5, 2017 at 2:20 pm | #

      Welcome back.

    • Rukduk
      Rukduk
      June 5, 2017 at 3:43 pm | #

      Welcome back Cerberus. *gesture of support* How are things going with the job and the fiancé? I know you were annoyed about the other teachers who didn’t actually stand up to your scumbag school head coming out of the woodworks all of a sudden, so I hope these past few weeks have been good for you and your students. I also hope you’re new job goes well. Also, about reaction 4: Gabe and Jack totally wanted to be a thing but Jack wouldn’t because of command reasons right? And Tracer is awesome as a possible role model for young lesbian women. Also, am I a bad person for feeling like Sombra and D.Va would make a nice couple based on their shared interests of electronics and tgeir similar joking attitude? And despite being a white cis-male I really relate to Symmetra because we’re both on the spectrum, and I have a lot of the same problems with crowds and properly communicating. Also, I now need to check if Steven Universe is still on hiatus. I must know if Peridot and Lapis become canon!!

      • Spencer
        Spencer
        June 5, 2017 at 3:46 pm | #

        Steven Universe is back and Lapis and Peridot have become Lesbian Farmers.

        • Rukduk
          Rukduk
          June 5, 2017 at 9:07 pm | #

          Last episode I remember was the one with that one ruby stealing back the ruby ship to fly back to homeworld. So I get what you’re sayin.

    • MatsuoTanuki
      MatsuoTanuki
      June 5, 2017 at 5:44 pm | #

      I wasn’t aware Overwatch was a thing queers obsessed over.

      • Micki
        Micki
        June 5, 2017 at 7:27 pm | #

        Well, that explains my sister. LOL

    • Bagge
      Bagge
      June 6, 2017 at 3:33 am | #

      *All the hugs*

    • Pablo360
      Pablo360
      June 6, 2017 at 7:57 am | #

      Your Panel 4 analysis describes me perfectly. I don’t even play Overwatch, I just read other people’s McHanzo.

  151. timemonkey
    timemonkey
    June 5, 2017 at 12:37 pm | #

    So glad to be back with Danny and Joe.

    • Spencer
      Spencer
      June 5, 2017 at 2:45 pm | #

      Said no one ever.

  152. Rosstifer
    Rosstifer
    June 5, 2017 at 12:41 pm | #

    ‘All joke aside Joe, my ex-girlfriend killed a guy a couple days ago. Cut his balls off and let him bleed to death. It was really fucking gruesome. I have no idea why I thought learning the ukulele would help, but I need to do something other than picture the event over and over again in my mind.’

    • 3oranges
      3oranges
      June 5, 2017 at 12:57 pm | #

      “I heard my ex-girlfriend took up the machete, and I thought that might make for a good shared interest. But you don’t see many Portuguese instruments around here, so this ukulele was the closest thing I could find.”

  153. Fire_daws
    Fire_daws
    June 5, 2017 at 1:05 pm | #

    What t’fk happened to Amber?????

    DAMN YOU WILLIS!!!!!!!

  154. Brumagem
    Brumagem
    June 5, 2017 at 1:36 pm | #

    Headcanon: when Joe says “”Mornin’ little buddy” he’s referring to his penis when Dan-o so Ridley assumes everything is about him and his instrument of Satan.

    • ValdVin
      ValdVin
      June 5, 2017 at 3:59 pm | #

      Of course Joe talks to his member; it’s good to be on speaking terms with the decisionmaker in a relationship.

      (I’ll show myself out.)

      • MatsuoTanuki
        MatsuoTanuki
        June 5, 2017 at 5:45 pm | #

        *chokes on drink*

    • Orion Fury
      Orion Fury
      June 5, 2017 at 11:22 pm | #

      How in the hell did it take over 13 hours for this comment to be made? I was 10 top level comments away from asking if Willis was deleting them.

  155. Spencer
    Spencer
    June 5, 2017 at 2:27 pm | #

    Guys holy crap Ryan isn’t dead. We’re not suddenly in for Amber as a murderer. That would be awful.

    • Guairdean
      Guairdean
      June 5, 2017 at 7:50 pm | #

      As the bird said, you’d be amazed at what you can live through.

    • Fart Captor
      Fart Captor
      June 5, 2017 at 8:08 pm | #

      Not being murdered doesn’t guarantee that he’s alive. He totally could have been hit by a truck on his way to the hospital

  156. Nenja
    Nenja
    June 5, 2017 at 3:04 pm | #

    Damn, the cliffhanger. I knew this was coming, since this is the ‘strip from the FUTURE’ that was promised people on the kickstarter, but still: what happened to Amber!?

    also, with a chapter-name like ‘The DO-list’, I wonder if Joe will get development?

    • Spencer
      Spencer
      June 5, 2017 at 3:10 pm | #

      Given the nature of the comic she was presumably stopped from killing Ryan by either the police or campus security and had to give a statement along with Dorothy. Maybe afterwards she was taken to the hospital.

      She has a character model for this chapter so she’s gonna show up.

  157. CJ
    CJ
    June 5, 2017 at 4:55 pm | #

    Has the color of Joe’s bedsheets changed and the last panel is a dream? Or are the blue sheets Danny’s?

  158. Spencer
    Spencer
    June 5, 2017 at 5:00 pm | #

    You know I have to say I’m pleasantly surprised by the total lack of “god look how much better Danny is without that psycho harpy Amber” going on in the comments today. I thought for sure that’d be the gist of things and I’d have to avoid it, but so far so good.

  159. Rodimiss
    Rodimiss
    June 5, 2017 at 5:18 pm | #

    This is honest-to-god one of the funniest things I have seen in a long time, especially Danny’s face in the last panel.

  160. Oberon
    Oberon
    June 5, 2017 at 6:09 pm | #

    Having a room mate who plays the ukulele would not be such a bad thing.
    .
    .
    .
    Having a room mate who was just learning to play the ukulele would be a living hell, a waking nightmare, and any number of other combinations of two words which describe a completely unbearable situation.

    Options include “justifiable homicide,” “broken ukulele,” and and any number of other combinations of two words which describe the means to end such a situation.

    • ValdVin
      ValdVin
      June 5, 2017 at 9:26 pm | #

      Having a roomie learning to play any instrument is much the same. (Don’t ask me how I know.)

  161. Reltzik
    Reltzik
    June 5, 2017 at 7:08 pm | #

    Sorry, Danny, but no. NO. That’s a nerd instrument. Billie will back me up on this. And I’m not talking cool late-90s/2000s dignified nerd chic. I’m talking 80s/early-90s sitcom nerd laughingstock. It’s a tiny, high-pitched, annoying, unwelcome tool.

    It’s an Urkelele.

    • StClair
      StClair
      June 5, 2017 at 7:44 pm | #

      *claps* Just so.

  162. Micki
    Micki
    June 5, 2017 at 7:23 pm | #

    Ahahaha — that alt-text made me laugh out loud. 🙂 I’m a sucker for corny jokes.

  163. McBogue
    McBogue
    June 5, 2017 at 10:52 pm | #

    Don’t rate musical instruments, Joe.

  164. Poskie
    Poskie
    June 5, 2017 at 11:05 pm | #

    I’m laughing at this strip and Danny’s stupid face, but it’s with a tic in my eye and a tiny voice in my brain screaming “WHAT HAPPENED WITH AMBER AND RYAN.” The laughter hinges on hysterical. Still it does not stop.

  165. Sarda
    Sarda
    June 6, 2017 at 10:09 pm | #

    I find it extremely hard to believe that three entire days passed without anyone finding out that a student murdered another student. Amber’s hopeless, sure, but Dorothy would have told someone.

    • David M Willis
      David M Willis
      June 6, 2017 at 11:28 pm | #

      I would also find that extremely hard to believe!

      Note to self: go back in time, tell self to NOT write strip that says Ryan is murdered and that also nobody found out about it somehow.

      *looks at strip*

      whoa, time travel works

  166. Griffin Fredette
    Griffin Fredette
    June 7, 2017 at 3:40 am | #

    “but how could three days pass without everyone knowing that ryan was murdered????”
    maybe because

    he wasn’t murdered you dingueses.

    or maybe danny and joe know and are indifferent idk

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