Dumbing of Age Book Twelve

Dumbing of Age

A college webcomic by David Willis
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we all feel so attacked right now
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June 1, 2026

Recorded

by David M Willis on March 9, 2018 at 12:01 am
  • 03 - Faz Is Great
└ Tags: amber

Discussion (97) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. Ana Chronistic
    Ana Chronistic
    March 9, 2018 at 12:01 am | #

    ← every evening from 12:30a to ~2:30a =_=

    • m-m
      m-m
      March 9, 2018 at 12:01 am | #

      Co-sign

      • Doctor_Who
        Doctor_Who
        March 9, 2018 at 12:03 am | #

        Yep. Why is it always 2:30? Like, almost on the dot, that’s the exact time the internet finally becomes less appealing than sleep.

        • Yumi
          Yumi
          March 9, 2018 at 12:07 am | #

          I used to do this weird thing where I would have a lot of issues with going to sleep between midnight and 3am. Like, I either had to be asleep by midnight, or my brain would be like, “Oh no, gotta wait for 3am now. Missed the last train to dreamland for a couple hours, we did. It’s not the same day within the continental United States and there’ll be no sleeping until it is again.”

          • Bruceski
            Bruceski
            March 9, 2018 at 1:01 am | #

            Yeah, the second wind gets me too. The frustrating thing for me is that I am definitely a night own physically, but psychologically I need to be diurnal or I get SUPER depressed and moody. I can keep to a day schedule, and am happier for it, but one slip-up and I have to fight to establish it again.

            • Jimi
              Jimi
              March 9, 2018 at 2:10 am | #

              My life was being gradually destroyed by that problem until I got into weed.

              • Clif
                Clif
                March 9, 2018 at 4:38 am | #

                Some of us aren’t fully alive until 3AM.

                • Marsh Maryrose
                  Marsh Maryrose
                  March 9, 2018 at 6:28 pm | #

                  Most of my 20’s and 30’s, I usually stayed awake unill 5:00 AM. In my early 40’s, some internal switch flipped, and I started waking up at 5:00 AM.

    • Bruceski
      Bruceski
      March 9, 2018 at 1:00 am | #

      Yup. “Oh I’ll just put something on Youtube until I get tired. What, this is a 2-hour quiz show and I’m settling in for repetitive phone games? Pay no attention to that, conscious brain.”

    • the GrumpyBear
      the GrumpyBear
      March 9, 2018 at 8:07 am | #

      My body is weird about caffeine. A cup of coffee or a single energy drink will wake me up some. Any more than that, and I actually start getting more sleepy. If I want to go to sleep RIGHT NOW I just down an entire pot of coffee and I’m out in 15 minutes.

      • Ishdakitty
        Ishdakitty
        March 9, 2018 at 12:10 pm | #

        That’s pretty common for people with ADHD. I’m the same way. The first time I ever tried a red bull I was asleep in fifteen minutes. XD

      • Dg
        Dg
        March 9, 2018 at 6:29 pm | #

        Me too.

    • Ana Chronistic
      Ana Chronistic
      March 10, 2018 at 2:06 am | #

      DOING IT AGAIN, DAMN IT

  2. AnvilPro
    AnvilPro
    March 9, 2018 at 12:01 am | #

    Sure we may all “feel” attacked right now, but you know who has been attacked? That pillow.

  3. shadowcell
    shadowcell
    March 9, 2018 at 12:02 am | #

    i like to think she dropped onto her pillow directly from the ceiling

    • Ozzi
      Ozzi
      March 9, 2018 at 3:33 am | #

      Belly flopped from the ISS.

      • Felix
        Felix
        March 9, 2018 at 6:00 am | #

        I did that once, but from the moon, it was fun. Then I woke up. :/

    • ValdVin
      ValdVin
      March 9, 2018 at 8:43 am | #

      Is everyone trying to hang from the ceiling by their shoelaces?

  4. Valerie
    Valerie
    March 9, 2018 at 12:02 am | #

    I just came here to have a good time, and honestly…

  5. Doctor_Who
    Doctor_Who
    March 9, 2018 at 12:02 am | #

    Haha, yeah, I can’t relate to this at all. It’s not like I read webcomics that update at midnight or anything.

    • Chaucer59
      Chaucer59
      March 9, 2018 at 1:00 am | #

      Yeah, what kind of loser would fall into such an obvious timesuck?

      • Deanatay
        Deanatay
        March 9, 2018 at 8:56 am | #

        You know, the comic will still be here at 6am.

        The REAL reason you have to be here at midnight is for the comments section. Admit it, the people here mean more to you than sleep.

        Or, at least, being FIRST means more to you than sleep.

  6. tim gueguen
    tim gueguen
    March 9, 2018 at 12:03 am | #

    “Soon Faz will be trending number one on Twitter. Every day.”

    • David DeLaney
      David DeLaney
      March 11, 2018 at 5:19 am | #

      “And by number one, Faz has a chart explaining that phrase’s relation to using his penis.”

      –Dave, at which point Trump countertweets and all becomes higgledy-piggledy

  7. Yumi
    Yumi
    March 9, 2018 at 12:04 am | #

    I blame this comic for me being this way. “Time to go to bed,” I’ll say. “Oh, it’s 11:50pm,” I’ll say. “Might as well wait for DoA to update,” I’ll sAY. “Might as well post one (1) comment,” I’LL SAY

    • Marsh Maryrose
      Marsh Maryrose
      March 9, 2018 at 12:31 am | #

      In my time zone, the comic updates a little after 9:00 PM, which, during the work week, is right around the time I need to be starting my shutdown sequence (which means cutting myself off from pixeled screens of any sort).

      It’s 9:30 PM now and I was just getting started, but instead I’m just going to utter a sincere and heartfelt “Damn you, Willis!” and retire.

      • adjudicus
        adjudicus
        March 9, 2018 at 4:03 am | #

        Thankfully, in my timezone updates are at 12:00pm, which makes my lunch that much more interesting (though sometimes I end up on the receiving end of some quizzical stares due to cackling like a demon.)

    • Tacos
      Tacos
      March 9, 2018 at 12:38 am | #

      What even is this thing called “sleep”?

  8. Passchendaele
    Passchendaele
    March 9, 2018 at 12:04 am | #

    haha I basically just did this

  9. Laladoria
    Laladoria
    March 9, 2018 at 12:04 am | #

    Every time i go to lay in bed. Every time. Sure, it isn’t TWITTER, but who can sleep when there’s so much INTERNET left to read?!

    • Inahc
      Inahc
      March 9, 2018 at 12:18 am | #

      yep. I try to stick to my kindle, which is far too bad at internets. it can barely handle fanfiction.net 😛

      plus, eink is far easier on the eyes.

  10. Kernanator
    Kernanator
    March 9, 2018 at 12:05 am | #

    Wouldn’t know anything about being stuck on social media when I have other things I want and need to do.

  11. newllend(henryvolt)
    newllend(henryvolt)
    March 9, 2018 at 12:06 am | #

    To Alt text David: You feeling alright.

  12. Dean
    Dean
    March 9, 2018 at 12:06 am | #

    Also, there’s a video of a guy bouncing down a hallway on his thingley.

  13. Tacos
    Tacos
    March 9, 2018 at 12:16 am | #

    We can all relate to Amber. Might not be Twitter but there’s a lot of stuff on the Interwebz.

    • Needfuldoer
      Needfuldoer
      March 9, 2018 at 2:06 am | #

      Oh yes. I’ve fallen down the Wikipedia rabbit hole many a time. You just haven’t lived until you’ve been up until 3 AM reading pages on the Space Race.

  14. DarkoNeko
    DarkoNeko
    March 9, 2018 at 12:25 am | #

    Hey, this is me. this is totally me.

  15. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    March 9, 2018 at 12:28 am | #

    I know it’s not but Amber looks like she’s sporting a 5 O’clock shadow.

    • Yumi
      Yumi
      March 9, 2018 at 12:30 am | #

      The pillow give magical beard powers.

    • Dellaran
      Dellaran
      March 9, 2018 at 12:50 am | #

      Yay Ashley!

    • Needfuldoer
      Needfuldoer
      March 9, 2018 at 2:10 am | #

      This chapter is actually composed of stills from the pilot of a DoA animated series. Problem is, Hanna-Barbera won the contract…

      • ValdVin
        ValdVin
        March 9, 2018 at 8:52 am | #

        If you think that’s unpromising, wait til you hear the soundtrack.

        (Actually, you have: It’s just their stock music from the ’60s.)

        • Needfuldoer
          Needfuldoer
          March 9, 2018 at 2:51 pm | #

          Next time we see Fuckface he’ll be 6 feet tall, walking upright, and wearing a hat, shirt collar, and necktie.

          • David DeLaney
            David DeLaney
            March 11, 2018 at 5:20 am | #

            … and monocle?

            –Dave, tell us more

    • Inahc
      Inahc
      March 9, 2018 at 2:18 am | #

      Amber is an Experience. 😉

      • ValdVin
        ValdVin
        March 9, 2018 at 8:53 am | #

        “Now. Go. Get. Sleep!”

    • DT
      DT
      March 10, 2018 at 12:37 pm | #

      Oh good I’m not the only one who noticed.

  16. Yumi
    Yumi
    March 9, 2018 at 12:29 am | #

    Yo, any non-cis or cis-and-experience-gender-dysphoria folks want to drop some tips for minimizing feelings of gender dysphoria related anxiety? Like, really just short term things that might make, say, a doctor’s visit easier.
    I’m trying not to throw up this time.

    • Opus the Poet
      Opus the Poet
      March 9, 2018 at 1:00 am | #

      When we had trans people renting the spare room we helped by referring to them by their preferred gender even when the situation did not call for a gender reference. Constant reminder they were who they felt like they were, from an outside source, made them feel more like the gender they preferred.

      I don’t know if that helps you, but it helped them. We rented to a transman ad a transwoman.

    • Inahc
      Inahc
      March 9, 2018 at 2:26 am | #

      I don’t know anything about gender, but short term postponement of anxiety is what benzos are good at.
      …oh, but you’d need a doctor appointment to get a prescription. So I guess that’s still a problem.

      For not throwing up, I used to suck on candies… The most effective were really stale fruit pastilles (stale because i only got them when my uncle visited from England). Something about the sugar and acidity seemed to calm my throat.

    • SaerSaur
      SaerSaur
      March 9, 2018 at 9:08 pm | #

      Seconding Opus The Poet, constant affirmation of gender can be great. My wife and I are both trans and we affirm each other constantly.

      I am trans masculine, and recently got my first binder. Wearing it feels good. But even when I am not wearing it, I can still improve how I feel by wearing clothes that feel masculine to me (and then having my wife affirm my gender 10000x times).

      Framing certain actions/interests in a gender affirming way. Key for me is that it has the be my own framing, but once I have established one others can use it for affirmation. Like, I study social work, sand most of my fellow students are women, which could be dysphoria inducing. But if I think of it in terms of how I am a dude who is unafraid of being in a woman dominated field, it gets a lot better.

      I think doctor appointments can be especially tricky, especially if reception and/or the doctor deadname you or highlight the wrong gender. And getting a pap smear sucked because I don’t like being reminded of my reproductive anatomy.

      • Yumi
        Yumi
        March 9, 2018 at 11:58 pm | #

        Yeah, the doctor appointment in question was at the gyno. I went on Tuesday but had to go back because on Tuesday I threw up before the procedure actually happened. But I went back today and did not throw up, so yay.

  17. Some Random Name
    Some Random Name
    March 9, 2018 at 12:29 am | #

    She fell with her glasses on. I call bullshit, that shit hurts.

    • Inahc
      Inahc
      March 9, 2018 at 2:28 am | #

      That doesn’t stop me from doing it >.< But I've only had glasses a couple of years, maybe I'll learn eventually.

      • Deanatay
        Deanatay
        March 9, 2018 at 9:01 am | #

        My SO keeps a pair of glasses by the bed specifically for reading their phone in bed.

  18. Fart Captor
    Fart Captor
    March 9, 2018 at 12:29 am | #

    Haha I definitely haven’t been suddenly been browsing Life Is Strange fan art at 11:30 at night because Twitter wasn’t providing me with enough heated arguments and honestly I just NEEDED IT because it’s all so goddamn cute and sweet (and also very, very gay) and is healing my heart and oops, now it’s 2am and I have to work in the morning

    Certainly not the sort of thing that’s likely to happen again and again, or which has happened more often than not since I got sucked into Twitter. I am a responsible v adult, you see. Very sensible

    • Emperor Norton II
      Emperor Norton II
      March 9, 2018 at 11:03 pm | #

      You’ve certainly convinced me.

  19. Keulen
    Keulen
    March 9, 2018 at 12:39 am | #

    I don’t even bother trying to get sleep when I know there’s stuff I still want to do on the Internet. Yes I don’t get enough sleep why do you ask?

  20. Xailenrath
    Xailenrath
    March 9, 2018 at 12:47 am | #

    The Human Condition, circa 2018

  21. brionl
    brionl
    March 9, 2018 at 12:55 am | #

    Two Hours Later…

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wana6XQn7QU

  22. Bagge
    Bagge
    March 9, 2018 at 12:55 am | #

    “Huh, someone says their dog is stolen.”
    (…)
    *wakes up*
    “Huh, someone says Amazigirl saved their dog.”

    • BenRG
      BenRG
      March 9, 2018 at 3:59 am | #

      Basically, yes. I’m hoping and praying for Amazi-Girl to run into Danny and Sal and for them to realise that there is something very wrong happening here.

      • Bagge
        Bagge
        March 9, 2018 at 4:32 am | #

        As long as she doesn’t run into Faz…

      • HeatherJean
        HeatherJean
        March 9, 2018 at 7:10 pm | #

        I’m still hoping she finds out that, during the past few hours while she’s been Faz-sitting, Amazi-girl has been sighted doing Amazi-good deeds.

    • Deanatay
      Deanatay
      March 9, 2018 at 9:02 am | #

      “I am Tyler Durden’s repressed sense of justice.”

  23. cookie1995
    cookie1995
    March 9, 2018 at 12:57 am | #

    most accurate page of dumbing of age willis has ever written

  24. Jesse
    Jesse
    March 9, 2018 at 1:01 am | #

    I basically did this just today.

  25. ZORK
    ZORK
    March 9, 2018 at 1:02 am | #

    It’s early morning, I just went to the bathroom, now I’m back in my bed and intended to sleep for another hour, but instead I’m here now.

    So yeah, I can relate to Amber so much right.

  26. threePwny
    threePwny
    March 9, 2018 at 1:02 am | #

    Now that I’m caught up with DoA, I can’t spend longer than five minutes on it before I’m bored enough to sleep. *sigh* I need more webcomics to binge

  27. No Name
    No Name
    March 9, 2018 at 1:29 am | #

    This is why I don’t have a smartphone, tablet, or laptop. So I actually have to get up out of bed to enjoy the internet. It doesn’t actually help, but it does keep the bed free of internet angst so I can actually sleep when I’m finally tired.

    • Needfuldoer
      Needfuldoer
      March 9, 2018 at 2:17 am | #

      Mine live across the room and don’t get touched at bedtime. The tablet will still be there in the morning for the daily webcomics fix.

      The phone is also my alarm clock, so I have to get up to stop it every morning. It’s more effective than the real alarm clock just for that reason.

      The bed’s a no-Internet area after 6 PM. Maybe that will help?

      • Bagge
        Bagge
        March 9, 2018 at 3:42 am | #

        I game the system by constantly breaking my phone.

        “What did you say, brain, are you addicted to easily accessible screen time? TO BAD IF SOMETHING WERE TO HAPPEN TO IT!”

      • wynne
        wynne
        March 9, 2018 at 8:05 am | #

        My phone charges in a different room overnight, and it has helped me be less attached. Not UNattached, mind you, but I tend to forget about checking it at home. Having a slide or flip phone until late 2014ish probably helped too.

        The laptop’s a different story (she typed from her bed). Uhhhh… blue light filters, eh?

  28. Zaidyer
    Zaidyer
    March 9, 2018 at 1:32 am | #

    Dang it, there’s always more Twitter!

    • Bagge
      Bagge
      March 9, 2018 at 3:54 am | #

      Great callback!

  29. Dana
    Dana
    March 9, 2018 at 1:41 am | #

    Oh shit.

  30. BenRG
    BenRG
    March 9, 2018 at 1:45 am | #

    Amber, I think that checking Twitter (and thus getting angry at the latest trending hashtags) is really counter-productive to napping.

    • Deanatay
      Deanatay
      March 9, 2018 at 9:04 am | #

      But… someone on there is WRONG. ALWAYS…

  31. C.T Phipps
    C.T Phipps
    March 9, 2018 at 2:38 am | #

    I’m really hoping she finds time to bone Danny.

  32. Revil Fox
    Revil Fox
    March 9, 2018 at 3:28 am | #

    I feel so attac…oh. Fine then.

  33. BenRG
    BenRG
    March 9, 2018 at 3:58 am | #

    For some reason a phrase has jumped into my head: “Twitter is the Napkiller.”

    • Deanatay
      Deanatay
      March 9, 2018 at 9:08 am | #

      I must not Twitter
      Twitter is the Nap-Killer
      Twitter is the little time suck that bring total desolation.
      I shall ignore my Twitter
      I shall allow the world’s events to pass over and through me
      And when it is gone I will – oh, who am I kidding
      *pulls out phone*

      • Bathymetheus
        Bathymetheus
        March 9, 2018 at 10:47 am | #

        The original of that poem goes with mind-enhancing drug(s). Which of course we do not endorse (not the royal ‘we’ – I am sure I represent the entire DoA readership in this opinion).

        Also, Dune!

        • Bathymetheus
          Bathymetheus
          March 10, 2018 at 9:23 pm | #

          Perhaps I should add ” /s” to the end of the parenthesized expression.

  34. Clif
    Clif
    March 9, 2018 at 4:36 am | #

    None of us has ever done this.

  35. Joe Covenant
    Joe Covenant
    March 9, 2018 at 4:44 am | #

    Would it be too avante-garde for tomorrow’s strip to be six panels of the sixth panel from today’s? 🙂

    • Solenoid
      Solenoid
      March 9, 2018 at 1:54 pm | #

      I’m actively hoping that’s tomorrow’s strip now.

    • Jhon
      Jhon
      March 9, 2018 at 8:55 pm | #

      You have a graphics editor, don’t you? What’s stopping you?

  36. C.
    C.
    March 9, 2018 at 7:04 am | #

    After I have my nighttime pills, I lay in bed with my phone for the 20 minutes or so before they kick in.

  37. Eldritch Gentleman
    Eldritch Gentleman
    March 9, 2018 at 9:02 am | #

    A very random and very unlikely idea…
    I’ve been randomly thinking about that time Sal told Marcie that Malaya might not be homosexual at all because she had absolutely no interest in Marcie’s boobs. But then it hit me, what if Marcie just isn’t Malaya’s type. What if Sal is and Malaya is doing the dumb “bullying the girl I like” shtick.

    • BBCC
      BBCC
      March 9, 2018 at 10:16 am | #

      In Sal’s defence, she also asked if Malaya seemed interested in other girls.

      • Eldritch Gentleman
        Eldritch Gentleman
        March 9, 2018 at 4:03 pm | #

        And this reminds me how Sal misinterpreted Marcie’s “I’d tap that” into “Yeah I’d punch her too”

  38. Solenoid
    Solenoid
    March 9, 2018 at 1:53 pm | #

    Face first, hugging the pillow. Not a bad way to sleep. Just gotta make sure the phone’s somewhere else. :V

  39. Nenja
    Nenja
    March 9, 2018 at 7:07 pm | #

    oh yes, that’s me. Actually, I should go to sleep now, instead of reading this comic.

  40. Mojo
    Mojo
    March 9, 2018 at 9:36 pm | #

    You know… I still want to know what the heck happened to scarface guy.

    • Emperor Norton II
      Emperor Norton II
      March 9, 2018 at 11:09 pm | #

      I think he’s upgraded his name to scarbody.

  41. Formedras
    Formedras
    March 9, 2018 at 11:17 pm | #

    No… what you SHOULD be doing is checking Mastodon.

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