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August 1, 2023

Certainly

by David M Willis on May 26, 2018 at 12:01 am
  • 04 – Of Mike And Men

└ Tags: jennifer, ruth

Discussion (72) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. Doctor_Who
    Doctor_Who
    May 26, 2018 at 12:02 am | #

    Billie had better get a move on, three other people need to wake up with her butt in their face today.

    • butts
      butts
      May 26, 2018 at 12:03 am | #

      good morning, doctor

      • Doctor_Who
        Doctor_Who
        May 26, 2018 at 12:04 am | #

        Waking up at the crack of dawn is for amateurs.

        Dawn’s butt isn’t nearly as nice as Billie’s.

        • Side One
          Side One
          May 26, 2018 at 12:46 am | #

          But she may be even more popular… at least with the Amateurs.

        • Victor
          Victor
          May 26, 2018 at 3:12 am | #

          Disagree.

          http://www.nitrocomics.com/cfd5a.jpg

        • Yet_One_More_Idiot
          Yet_One_More_Idiot
          May 26, 2018 at 1:42 pm | #

          Waking up at the crack of dawn is for amateurs.

          But Billie’s not an amateur. No sirree-Bob.

          Tomorrow morning, she’s gonna be waking up at the crack of Dawn. (yeah yeah it’s a crummy buttcrack-related joke…what, you expected more from me? :P)

        • Tim
          Tim
          May 27, 2018 at 1:11 am | #

          No need to get cheeky.

  2. Dafydd
    Dafydd
    May 26, 2018 at 12:02 am | #

    How quickly their places seem to have reversed…

  3. butts
    butts
    May 26, 2018 at 12:03 am | #

    BOOYAH

    • doomska
      doomska
      May 26, 2018 at 12:21 am | #

      Noice

    • Pablo360
      Pablo360
      May 26, 2018 at 1:07 am | #

      And all is right with the world once more

  4. TrueVCU
    TrueVCU
    May 26, 2018 at 12:03 am | #

    Ruth: no, no one has been nailed it is rather vexing DO ME NOW

  5. BBCC
    BBCC
    May 26, 2018 at 12:03 am | #

    I’m having a rough day, faith in humanity wise so I’m just going to say Ruth’s eyes are very pretty in this lighting and also go back to happy mental health places.

    • Mr D
      Mr D
      May 26, 2018 at 12:14 am | #

      Did you try eating? When I’m depressed, A good meal, a sweet dessert and laying in bed to watch cartoons makes me feel great in no time.

      • BBCC
        BBCC
        May 26, 2018 at 2:04 am | #

        I might get some milk in a minute. And then maybe in the morning I’ll check out some Steven Universe or something like that that always makes me happy.

        • butts
          butts
          May 26, 2018 at 2:37 am | #

          Hey.

          Butts loves you.

          (butts love you? i’m not sure how i should be pluralizing… my…selves…?)

          • Deanatay
            Deanatay
            May 26, 2018 at 11:37 am | #

            Are you a person named butts? Or are you, actually, a collection of butts? It’s linguistically relevant.

    • Inahc
      Inahc
      May 26, 2018 at 12:26 am | #

      *jedi hugs*

      • BBCC
        BBCC
        May 26, 2018 at 2:03 am | #

        😀 Jedi hugs are best hugs!

        • Screwball
          Screwball
          May 26, 2018 at 2:17 am | #

          Does that mean a Sith Hug is actually Force Choke?

          • BBCC
            BBCC
            May 26, 2018 at 2:26 am | #

            I think its more like that awkward scene in DH 2 where Voldemort hugs Draco.

          • Crusading Barista
            Crusading Barista
            May 26, 2018 at 6:58 am | #

            They share love through choke hold

            • Schpoonman
              Schpoonman
              May 26, 2018 at 9:23 am | #

              Don’t kink shame them.

        • Roborat
          Roborat
          May 29, 2018 at 2:53 pm | #

          Just put down the lightsaber first.

  6. Passchendaele
    Passchendaele
    May 26, 2018 at 12:03 am | #

    She’s nailing a bit more than that. <••>

    • Passchendaele
      Passchendaele
      May 26, 2018 at 12:05 am | #

      what did I do to mess <•< and its buddy up

      • Laladoria
        Laladoria
        May 26, 2018 at 12:21 am | #

        I’m assuming putting the arms were read as code and eaten as a result

        • vlademir1
          vlademir1
          May 26, 2018 at 12:29 am | #

          Yeah. If you’re using them in any online textbox that parses HTML style markup, rather than, say, BBCode style, you have to be careful what side you look toward first or use certain unicode tricks.
          >.>
          <.<
          -.-

  7. SailorCakes
    SailorCakes
    May 26, 2018 at 12:05 am | #

    That’s not all she wants to nail 😉

    • Pablo360
      Pablo360
      May 26, 2018 at 1:07 am | #

      She’s got a barn-raising to get to, after all.

      😉

  8. Cattleprod
    Cattleprod
    May 26, 2018 at 12:09 am | #

    That clear view of her scrunchie is weirding me out, my brain refuses to remember that Billie doesn’t have short hair in DoA, if her ponytail’s behind her head I just register it as not existing.

  9. Tacos
    Tacos
    May 26, 2018 at 12:09 am | #

    Yeah who needs math anyways?

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      May 26, 2018 at 1:11 am | #

      There are three types of people in the world, those who can count and those who don’t.

      • RicardtheDragoon
        RicardtheDragoon
        May 26, 2018 at 2:16 am | #

        And those who construct “kinds” jokes with broken parallelism. The first kind you mention possesses the ability to count while the second kind doesn’t perform the action to count. Those two kinds are not exclusive which is usually a crucial element to that type of joke. In particular, a person may be able to count, thus being of the first kind, and choose not to count, thus being also of the second kind.
        Perhaps that is part of the joke as well, but a little clarification seemed to be needed or at least I felt compelled to add it. Indeed, perhaps you are driving at a different and perhaps subtler point: everyone can count, but not everyone chooses to exercise that ability.

        • Dana
          Dana
          May 26, 2018 at 3:52 am | #

          Don’t explain the joke. Or do. That was actually pretty good.

          • Nymphie
            Nymphie
            May 26, 2018 at 7:18 am | #

            Richard made a joke on its own based on that previous joke should have said “there are three kinds of people in the world. Those who can count, and those that can’t.” not “don’t”. So it wasnt so much explaining the joke as deconstructing it

        • Chris Phoenix
          Chris Phoenix
          May 27, 2018 at 3:52 am | #

          Why does this remind me of Bubbles from QC?

      • Bicycle Bill
        Bicycle Bill
        May 26, 2018 at 6:20 am | #

        There are 10 kinds of people in the world … those who understand binary and those who don’t.
        (speaking of binary, Willis … back in the late 1970s there used to be a bank in downtown Columbus near the Statehouse that had a binary clock on its outside wall. Is it – the clock – still there and working?

  10. Mr D
    Mr D
    May 26, 2018 at 12:09 am | #

    Billy you gonna flunk out

    • Doctor_Who
      Doctor_Who
      May 26, 2018 at 12:13 am | #

      Billie: Dammit, I’m flunking math.

      Walky: I know a guy who can help. Want to go see him?

      Billie: Walky, I have no interest in meeting some nerd friend of yo-

      Walky: He works behind a bar.

      Billie: LET’S GO I LOVE MATH!

      • ǝ snow ʍousɐ
        ǝ snow ʍousɐ
        May 26, 2018 at 12:15 am | #

        Walky and Billie and Jason perform a drunken tutor

        • ǝ snow ʍousɐ
          ǝ snow ʍousɐ
          May 26, 2018 at 12:16 am | #

          tutorship? tutorial?

          • TemporalShrew
            TemporalShrew
            May 26, 2018 at 1:07 am | #

            No no, tutorship is what Sal and Jason were.

    • Bagge
      Bagge
      May 26, 2018 at 3:44 am | #

      Honestly, that’s a HUGE step up from the “codependent suicide pact” where she was a few days ago.

  11. Kernanator
    Kernanator
    May 26, 2018 at 12:16 am | #

    Oh cool, so popularity gives you teleportation.

    • jeffepp
      jeffepp
      May 26, 2018 at 1:53 am | #

      Well, that’s one way to explain that sleeping position.

    • BrokenEye, the True False Prophet
      BrokenEye, the True False Prophet
      May 26, 2018 at 2:35 am | #

      No, you’re thinking of mojo

      • King Daniel
        King Daniel
        May 26, 2018 at 6:21 pm | #

        Popularity gives you mojo? Mojo gives you teleportation?

        • SgtWadeyWilson
          SgtWadeyWilson
          May 27, 2018 at 10:29 am | #

          Popularity gives mojo teleportation.

  12. Stephen Bierce
    Stephen Bierce
    May 26, 2018 at 12:18 am | #

    *looks up an old Foster Grants jingle*

  13. newllend(henryvolt)
    newllend(henryvolt)
    May 26, 2018 at 12:19 am | #

    If Billie likes attention so much why not just take up acting or is she trying to become a reporter like in the last universe.

    • King Daniel
      King Daniel
      May 26, 2018 at 12:25 am | #

      As mentioned early in this comic’s run, she’s majoring in journalism.

      • Bagge
        Bagge
        May 26, 2018 at 3:24 am | #

        Huh. I was thinking maybe… THEATRE

        http://www.dumbingofage.com/2014/comic/book-5/01-when-somebody-loved-me/expelled/

  14. Marsh Maryrose
    Marsh Maryrose
    May 26, 2018 at 12:38 am | #

    Oh, crap. Did Billie get so drunk last night that she’s waking up still drunk?

    Not that I would recognize the signs from personal experience or anything.

    • thejeff
      thejeff
      May 26, 2018 at 8:02 am | #

      Last time we saw Billie she was with Faz, so maybe? I can see that driving someone to drink.

      [Obligatory Billie]I can drive myself[/Billie]

  15. C.T Phipps
    C.T Phipps
    May 26, 2018 at 12:43 am | #

    Billie is awesome because in McAwesomes, you never have to pretend to be an actual person. I’m curious, has Billie looked into joining any sorority’s? Those are the places you go when you need the stability of high school cliques and the comfort of being surrounded by fellow rich people.

  16. Side One
    Side One
    May 26, 2018 at 12:44 am | #

    This is prettymuch what my college experience was.
    Of course, this is also prettymuch why I dropped out.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      May 26, 2018 at 1:13 am | #

      Because of too much ass and not enough class??

  17. Keulen
    Keulen
    May 26, 2018 at 12:55 am | #

    As someone who was never one of the popular crowd in my school years, I still don’t see the point in doing stuff solely to be popular.

    • BenRG
      BenRG
      May 26, 2018 at 2:14 am | #

      Trust me, for strongly social people, not being in the ‘A’ set is worse than death.

      • BrokenEye, the True False Prophet
        BrokenEye, the True False Prophet
        May 26, 2018 at 2:33 am | #

        What’s the ‘A’ set? Is that similar to the A-Team?

        • BenRG
          BenRG
          May 26, 2018 at 2:58 am | #

          The most popular people – the ones that tell themselves that everyone wants to be part of their clique and that they have the right to bully everyone who isn’t part of their clique due to their intrinsic superiority.

  18. BenRG
    BenRG
    May 26, 2018 at 2:14 am | #

    If you recall, Billie, that attitude is why no-one wanted anything to do with you when you started at IU. I suspect that she has a violent and awful learning curve awaiting her.

    • Bagge
      Bagge
      May 26, 2018 at 9:46 am | #

      Yes, yes, but that was then.

      NOW she has a whole wing full of admirers, so now she can start over properly.

      • C.T Phipps
        C.T Phipps
        May 26, 2018 at 9:19 pm | #

        They really need to have Billie join a sorority.

        • Bagge
          Bagge
          May 27, 2018 at 10:13 pm | #

          Exactly her thought.

          Preferably one with lots of insane keg stand parties

  19. BrokenEye, the True False Prophet
    BrokenEye, the True False Prophet
    May 26, 2018 at 2:31 am | #

    Don’t call Ruth an “it”

  20. BKC
    BKC
    May 26, 2018 at 2:46 am | #

    Wearin’ those glasses, tho.

  21. Bagge
    Bagge
    May 26, 2018 at 3:19 am | #

    I’m glad to see that Billie is doing well in college.

  22. erejnion
    erejnion
    May 26, 2018 at 3:54 am | #

    Sasuga Billie.

  23. Teddae
    Teddae
    May 26, 2018 at 6:56 am | #

    Dammit billie…

  24. motorfirebox
    motorfirebox
    May 26, 2018 at 8:58 am | #

    Sunglasses! Over her regular glasses. Because that is what cool people do.

Joyce and Joe?

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