Nine days to go! Next stretch goal for the Dumbing of Age Book 8 Kickstarter: Unlocking a free Dorothy magnet for everybody who pledged for mailable goods!
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Nine days to go! Next stretch goal for the Dumbing of Age Book 8 Kickstarter: Unlocking a free Dorothy magnet for everybody who pledged for mailable goods!
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Me on cheat day
I wonder if this maybe points towards being bipolar rather than straight depression. One of the effects of being bipolar is that anti-depressants can send you in the other direction, toward mania. Binges, feeling unnaturally happy, an excess of other emotions like anger and even sadness can characterize the ‘up’ cycle. Maybe keep an eye out for losing concentration, excessive energy, and increased risk-taking behavior. Obviously it’s too early to tell for something like that, just something on my mind. Obviously when you’re down for so long, just feeling normal can feel that good itself at first.
One of the biggest warning signs for that is TOO rapid of a response to the meds, and Ruth took her time on these. She also hasn’t shown any other signs thus far, so I have my fingers crossed..but yeah, something to watch for.
Regardless, those are obviously some good drugs.
Yes, but this onslaught of positive feelings is happening directly after she had a big wave of negative feelings. To me, that means she just has access to a larger range of emotions now. And if she’s lived her whole live having difficulty with accessing dopamine, every little happy thing is going to be a really big deal now.
so far, she just need a bit to adjust. Like, meeting Billie <_<
Eh. “Not depressed” can feel really, really, really good.
As someone who’s overcome depression before, this is almost exactly what it’s like. Food has smells, flavors, fricken amazing colors that you’ve always known were there but you’re only just noticing them for the first time.
Same here! I teared up reading this strip because one of my most powerful memories of the healing process was walking down a street – I still even remember exactly where – and suddenly being aware of everything being in colour. It was like I was emerging out the other side of this grey fog.
Same, though in my case I remember when i started being able to emotionally respond to things and being delighted at my own delight when this occurred to me. It was like spring time! (In January )
Asma: Hey! No extending beyond the bounds of the panel! This isn’t Gwenpool!
I’d say this objection is
a little too late.
Does that count as an Asma attack?
Food, glorious food!
I would have quoted Willy Wonka, but this will do nicely.
BTW, this is, IIRC, the anniversary of the Robin-meets-Jesus-eating-a-chocolate-crucifix Shortpacked! strip.
Taste the Rainbow
I don’t know what to say about Ruth smiling so much. I hope it continues.
I wonder if it has anything to do with standing up to Billie.
Ooh, I was just chalking it all up to the meds kicking in, but I like your idea too.
They’re probably both related to each other…the meds giving her the oomph to be able to say something, which reinforces her newly found something-other-than-self-loathing…which will in turn help with her depression further.
I will shamelessly borrow “newly-found something other than self-loathing” as applicable for myself in the future. Internet cookie to be sent soon.
I’m not sure this theory makes any sense?
Like, even before being treated for depression, Ruth never had trouble standing up for herself. Blackmail and her grandfather using her brother as a hostage trip her up, but little else does.
If Ruth was thinking about her last fight with Billie, I’d expect to make her mood worse, not better. Their relationship may be playfully antagonistic, but they were on the same side. She shouldn’t have needed to stand up to Billie about quitting drinking.
I think for the moment she’s just caught up in being able to enjoy things
Throw in that she has been sober for long enough that she may be coming to the other side of withdrawal.
It’s nice to see her smiling and looking more happy, but it kinda weirds me out since I’ve gotten so used to seeing Ruth looking unhappy.
this is a bit jarring, yet I’m happy for her ?
My hope is we’ll get a course correction and show Ruth still loves collecting femurs and intimidating freshmen.
But now it sparks joy instead of fermenting resentment!
And now I have a mental image of Marie Kondo holding up someone’s femur in the middle of a disaster dorm room, and I don’t regret it in the least. 😀
“that person didn’t spark joy”
Kirby Begins
But his first game was on the Game Boy, so no color. ‘Cept green.
Green Greens.
The music in this strip is that song from Harvey Birdman where Live Action Harvey is gallavanting around the city
Yeah, that fits really well.
Welcome back, Ruth.
Barely managed to get the madness in before March ended
BORGER
HERETIC BORGER
Gloria Borger
MEXO
LOCOOOOOOO!
No don’t everything with color. Not all of that is edible.
*don’t eat
Don’t stop her now- she’s having such a good time!
She’s having a
ballburgerJust don’t heat it to 200 degrees!
Yay, more Asma! And Ruth is so happy. <3
So happy for Ruth!
This better not come crashing down and crush all our spirits.
Depends. What comic are you reading and what do the initials D. Y. stand for?
[Horshak] I know, I know, pick me Mr. Kotter [/Horshak]
Cue Kotter earworm in 3… 2… 1…
*waits* Huh, nothing.
Oh, nope. There it is.
I do have to ask – is it common for those on anti-depressants to have an increase in appetite? Whether as a side-effect of the prescription or a different outlook on life doesn’t matter.
i’m not sure if it’s a medicine side effect with me, but when i’m especially down i just…don’t eat. it’s too much energy to do and it’s not “worth it” to my brain. i tend to keep around things that i can stuff in my face without cooking for this reason, but yeah. i just don’t eat.
Not sure if it’s medically induced or not, but food sounds far more interesting and I’m far more likely to eat when I’m on my antidepressants.
Same. Low appetite, and basic foods only, because anything fancier won’t give me any joy so why bother?
It depends. Some will generally decrease appetite, others will increase it. But typically they have little effect on appetite chemically, but the ability to taste things pleasurably often results in increased “appetite”.
Depression is tricky. Loss of appetite and increased appetite are actually both common symptoms of it. So basically if you were less likely to eat while you were depressed then you’ll eat more when the meds kick in. For me I tended to overeat when I was depressed, so when I found meds that worked I actually ate less.
It’s pretty common for psych meds to mess with appetite, hence the reputation they have for weight gain. I’ve gained close to 30kg due to meds (SNRI for major depression, olanzepine for same, pregabalin for chronic pain), and I was only 68kg to start with.
Better to be fat than obsessed with suicide (points to numerous scars).
Yes, it’s common. When we are depressed a lot of ordinary activities seem to be too much bother, including meals. I lost my freshman fifteen instead of gaining them because I had a bout of depression during which I couldn’t be bothered to eat except sometimes at night (I felt worst in the mornings and got rather better in the evenings). By contrast with that an ordinary appetite seems prodigious. And then you have the fact that some antidepressants increase appetite as a side-effect.
They can change appetite (every person’s response will be different), but I personally read this more as “I am enjoying things. …Holy shit, I feel good, and I’m enjoying things!!! Is this how normal people feel when they do these things??? I want to do things!!!” Because when you’re depressed, the normal brain processes for things like enjoyment, satisfaction, and accomplishment are weak and short-lived. Those are some of the first things that come back when you begin recovering. Idk if I’m making sense.
In addition to the ‘it depends’ everyone else has noted, it’s worth pointing out that Ruth’s ‘in color’ comment should be taken literally too- depression can cause mild visual problems, causing things to appear less saturated.
And *literally* darker. I mark the progression through my depressive cycles (I’m bipolar) by assessing my light perception. I know I’m edging in to a manic cycle because light will often seem too bright, even though the actual lumens in the spot haven’t changed. It’s even more fun because thanks to various eye surgeries, my eyes are rather light sensitive — light scatter (as with fog or mist) is painful.
So, yeah, desaturation can happen, and darkness can settle in. Things can get very grey and shadowy. Thankfully, my usually response when things start going black is to get to me bed and let myself sleep.
I was thinking more mood-swings.
When starting, or ending, mood-stabilisers, mood can swing wildly either way, and I think Ruth’s mood is just a side-effect of that.
I hope she doesn’t go to far in the up direction as that can be as disastrous as going the other direction.
To ride on the back of what SUGauthor posted, I was an overeater/comfort eater before my meds, and as soon as my meds kicked in, I had zero appetite. I literally dropped 10 pounds in the first two weeks just from not eating more than, like, a handful of crackers a day.
Once I stabilized, I discovered that my “comfort” foods – soda, pastries, cakes, candy bars, etc – tasted TERRIBLE. It was like I was pouring raw corn syrup in my mouth. (Which, yeah, basically you are – but when it’s disguised as ‘food,’ most people don’t notice.) On the other hand, other foods had real, marked flavors – even foods I used to season to the end of the planet and back. (I was once one of those people who would eat jalapenos raw and say, “Yeah, I guess it has a little bit of a bite, if you don’t eat spices.”) Now, I rarely go for the super-challenge spicy foods, but I can enjoy a much broader range of food and drink. (I also now understand why white people consider salt and pepper “seasoning,” because I can actually taste it in my food. XD) I will say that I am still – slowly, now – dropping down to a healthier weight just because there is WAY less garbage in my diet and WAY more actual food. [I want to emphasize this side note, because lack of an appetite/too much appetite for too long is a flag, folks. If you don’t stabilize to where you’re eating a regular, moderate amount of food each day, talk to you doc about whether or not you need a med check/adjustment. I’ve been through two adjustments to my med dosage! No two people are identical in what works for them.]
And yes, food has color now. Holy shit, does food have color. Taste the fuckin’ rainbow indeed. @_@
Days like these, I really wish we could upvote comments. Well said, BA!
finally, the non chik-fil-a members of the food court make an appearance. MEXO LOCO
Read food court members that have not yet made an appearance:
Vermilion Canteen
Display Depot
And while I’m perseverating about the food court in Read Hall: “Bistro” is a loan word from French. “El” is a Spanish adjective. The name “El Bistro” is just stupid, period and end of story.
Contrariwise, I can’t believe that “Mexo Loco” isn’t already the name of a restaurant chain.
What would you name a FrancoMex restaurant?
La Cage Aux Pollo
More confrontationally, Cinco de Mai or Cinq de Mayo. (Cinco de Mayo commemorates a Mexican victory over the French.)
All the internets are yours.
Google is your friend.
“El Bistro” gets plenty of hits. “Mexo Loco” on the other hand is an opportunity.
“Vermilion Canteen”? Don’t you mean “Maroon Saloon”?
This is so beautiful
I hadn’t really thought about it before but being healthier after having been dangerously clinically depressed is kinda like when you need glasses and wear them for the first time and notice that the trees have distinct leaves and road signs are legible
…um… this is bad, folks.
?
No, it isn’t.
I predict she’ll be Amazi-Girl’s Joker soon.
Sounds like you’re worried this is a manic phase kicking in. It’s possible, but it may also be an effect of rebalancing due to her meds. Let’s watch and see.
Some days, life feels so good that you want to eat at ALL of your favorite places.
And then you pay for it with an overstuffed stomach for two days.
And if she can’t finish both layer cakes, she can always donate the remaining one to Joyce for scientific dissection.
The Future’s So Bright, I Gotta Wear Shades
I bought that album.
I wonder if Asma’s scolding her for running, or if she’s surprised to see Ruth with pep in her step.
I’m glad Ruth’s riding the high, for however long it’s going to last. She’s had many years of rain, time for a rainbow.
I hope it’s the former because I compared Asma to Mr. Moseby just the other day.
I’ve always thought of her as the Read Hall lobby’s Odo.
In the immortal words of that little girl from the old El Paso commercials:
“Por que no los dos?”
And we have the next book title people! XD
Are we sure that her script didn’t push her into a manic episode?
All I can see is Ethan behind the counter, tearing of an Amazi-girl costume, yelling “¡Mexo Loco!”
Pretty much the brand’s mascot.
‘Everything is beautiful in God’s creaaaaaation’
See, if Ruth starts singing stuff like that, then the dorm’s going to achieve Peak Freakout.
The dorm is seemingly deserted. Everyone is hiding under their beds while Ruth skips back and forth in the corridor. On the third day, the scared residens push out Joyce to talk to Ruth and figure out if they dare to come out
Teachers across the campus are left puzzled as to what big event they missed that’s causing so many students to keep missing class.
has this comic become an advertisement for depression medication? therapy? is this a sign?
I mean in all seriousness, I would love to feel like this.
I mean, it is still a comic. All emotions, bad and good, tend to be amped up a bit.
DW would have to have a panel full of side effects warnings for that.
I wasn’t on medication but got out of my depression with therapy, so the switch between “just continuing to exist costs all my strength” and “wuhu, fun things are FUN” was less abrupt but.. Yeah. Pretty much this. Like life suddenly had colours.
Never give up fighting against depression. When you finally win, it’s so worth all the hardship.
This is faster, and more exaggerated than real life (to better connect with those who have felt this, and convey emotions to those who have not). But in all seriousness, yes. If you are able to, get ye to a therapist. Get ye some meds. If you want them, you will likely have to shop around for a therapist who is good for you, and try different medications before finding one that works. And you may find that you only need one of the two. But let me tell you, as someone who’s at about the stage of recovery that Ruth seems to be, it is so, so worth it. It takes a long time to become functional, and I’m not there yet myself, but the ability to feel satisfied with even minor accomplishments, to actively want things, to feel not just fleeting happiness, but contentment, it’s…
If you can get help, do it. I cannot recommend it enough.
B…Burber Derber’s…?
I was wondering if I was reading that right.
Legally speaking, Burber Dirbir’s is most definitely not based on any of the restaurants located in Read Hall’s El Bistro food court.
Try this link instead.
IU:RPS really needs to get its shit together, web development-wise. For starters, if they’re still using Adobe ColdFusion, a) for fuck’s sake, why? and b) they’d better migrate before all the dinosaurs like me who remember Adobe ColdFusion retire and they have to scrap everything.
I assumed Trump had named it.
Everything is chow, chow, chow
Everything is food to go now
Everything is enjoying the taste
From your breakfast, lunch and dinner plate
It is food
Everything is food
Food, food, food
Everything is food
Thank god I’m not the only one whos seen that movie
Was that to the tune of “Hot, hot, hot!”? because that was how I read it.
Everything is Food from the Popeye movie. (Although the lyrics have been changed to be more appropriate to the scene here.)
That’s exactly what it was like when I finally found the right dosage of SNRI medication. Everything had colour again.
Meds are not happy pills, but they can make life worth living for, and fighting for.
Thank you.
Honestly, yay for therapy and meds! This comic has had a few too many “PSH,PROFESSIONAL HELP IS FOR SUCKERS” moments from Sal and Amber so this is very very VERY nice.
Okay, I definitely remember Sal’s ‘therapy can lick my boots’ attitude, but when did Amber express anything like that? I’m very tired tonight, so I’m probably forgetting something obvious.
She does an “Oh me getting therapy, what an original idea” thing. I thiiink fairly recently but I archive binge parts of this comic too often so I could be wrong.
http://www.dumbingofage.com/2019/comic/book-9-comic/02-but-the-sun-still-shines/equipped/
Like anyone is equipped to deal with her. She thinks she’s beyond it.
That was Sal – “Therapy for me, what a novel suggestion’.
But yeah, Amber doesn’t think a therapist can possibly help her, because she thinks she’s too far gone.
I think it was because her Dad paid for some real loser therapists after the convenience store battle.
Nope. Amber didn’t see a therapist after the robbery. Everyone wanted her to, but her dad got her self defence classes instead.
That was around the time the divorce finalized.
Sal apparently saw a zillion (and oh, it sounds like Linda to drag her to every therapist she could find until she found an answer she liked) and the kindest thing she has to say is ‘none are worth shit’.
Ah, my bad. Amber said something similarly dismissive as pointed out by Seregiel.
I can kinda say the deal with Sal is that she was very much forced into therapy likely with aims of “correcting her behavior” as opposed to, ya know, helping her deal with stuff.
Point being, its nice when mental health issues are dealt with in ways other than violently.
Yeah, it seems like Sal was dragged to a ton of therapists who were, at best, unhelpful and at worst, not very nice to her. May also have been more based in Catholicism than Sal may have been comfortable with if it was in Tennessee (and I suspect her parents had a hand in her therapy in Indiana).
It really is nice – I’m proud of Ruth and Dorothy seeking good therapists. Roz also suggested one to Joyce in the wake of the Ryan incident, but Joyce didn’t take her up on it.
Yeah, the therapists Sal got dragged to were probably pressured into making her what Linda and Charles wanted her to be, instead of helping her through her issues on her own terms. That’s… ineffective at best.
Also, Dorothy found a therapist on her own after Amber did a puncturegeist on Ryan’s torso.
Feeling this rn. After nearly a decade on psychiatric medication, we finally found the right combo, and it kicked in for me this week. And now I want to eat EVERYTHING.
Congrats! It’s great that you are finally being rewarded for a decade of struggling with meds.
YAya I’m glad you’re on the upswing Ruth. A couple of weeks for things to get right and the color is coming back. YAY.,
Come on, Ruth, let’s sing it.
EVERYTHING IS AWESOME
EVERYTHING IS COOL WHEN YOU’RE PART OF A TEAM
EVERYTHING IS AWESOME
WHEN YOU’RE LIVING OUR DREAM
This is gonna end like that one episode of Spongebob.
“No, Ruth, the food goes to your thighs! Then you explode!”
What will femurs taste like now?
She won’t get that far, before she never noticed just how RED blood is.
Then she’ll drink it? Man, that’s dark.
🙂
that comment…
your avatar…
chills!
This update genuinely makes me happy.
…I’m gonna take this as a sign that I need to change my depression meds. I wanna eat colors. (Especially teal. Teal is a lovely color.)
A light meal, like in The Phantom Tollbooth?
BEST REFERENCE
I’m both thrilled that her meds are kicking in and concerned at how quickly her feeligs are changing. But mostly I’ve been there. Shortly after I started taking ADD meds I was amazed at how easy focusing on schoolwork became.
I think Ruth needs adult supervision when she is on these meds.
I’unno. I mean “ate some food 🍲” isn’t exactly a rampage. And she literally has a psychiatrist adult supervising the overall prescription.
“Everything’s in color and I want to eat it.” is not a normal reaction to food. Not even most foodies think that way.
Eh, it’s just NRE. For, like, living.
It…it is when you’ve lived too many years of your life without any will to perform basic self-care or self-sustaining actions? ‘Everything is in color’ is pretty common way to convey the feeling that comes with the cloud of depression lifting. The ‘color’ is symbolic for…meaning, and value, and even potentially joy.
So she’s not literally saying she wants to eat everything because it’s in color or whatever the hell. She’s saying she is suddenly re-discovering the concept of ENJOYING the taste of foods again, enough to potentially WANT to experience different kinds of food. Whereas before, eating was simply something you had to do to not die. Which to a suicidal person is in of itself not that great.
I would think “I want to eat it” is a *very* normal reaction to food… That… Is kind of what it’s for.
That’s what getting out of a deep depression feels like. Like, you had forgotten that the world wasn’t grey. It is colourful and bright and exciting and, yes, tasty and suddenly, you notice all that. And then, you try to make up for everything you missed.
She has a burger, a sandwich, some chili, some layer cake.
But she isn’t trying to eat the tray.
Anti-depressants are great when they work but I’m terrified of them. I can’t not worry where this arc goes.
Somehow not less cold coming from Rachel’s face.
My biggest problem with my anti-depressant meds was they would work for a little while and then the side effects kicked in and I was worse than I was before, only minus a sex life, or appetite, or things sounded buzzy (I have tinnitus from TBI, and got a temporary new ring that didn’t work well with the OG ringing), or the absolute worst my digestion got messed up.
Yeah, like if you need them and they work, which is a frequent occurrence, awesome. But this is just building up too good to end good. But maybe I’m reading this comic too much as “College Game of Thrones”.
I think the innate source of life pain is not from a George RR Martin making it a crapsack world because screw the audience.
I think it’s more like:
Ruth: “I want to grow and change and be my best self.”
Billie: “I don’t.”
Ruth: “O-ouch my heart!”
Seen another way, Ruth paid some of this in advance by crying it out in the shower.
this kinda has “uh-oh” stamped all across it.
Yeah, there’s going to be a hangover of some kind and a regret (if only indigestion) but I can’t really blame Ruth for wanting to enjoy having a hind brain that wants to be alive again.
Same.
One thing many people dont know is if someone actually has Bipolar disorder, antidepressants alone can sometimes trigger manic episodes. Drs usually add a mood stabilizer in those situations. I hope this is just Ruth coming out of the depression rather than swinging the other way.
This is likely her just coming out of apathy with all emotions coming back at full power all at once as uncontrollable crying and sadness is not a symptom of mania and other people have said this is their experience with antidepressants when recovering from depression.
Ruth is eventually going to get used to having her emotions blaring in her head at full volume but, today, she’s going to enjoy her second lease of life!
The way Asma is yelling ‘No running in the lobby!’, I’m thinking that she’s studying Library Science. There are certain skills that come with certain careers and that one definitely feels ‘Librarian’!
I completely understand Ruth right now. This is a very relatable moment.
Meds and being sober do that to you.
It’s weird how dependent ddent life-worth-living-ness is on tiny brain molecules. At least we know to make medicines for them.
Drugs! They’re what’s for dinner.
The only problem is their effectiveness varies so drastically between any two people.
Depression is a REALLY weird disease with a billion causes. Low serotonin levels are pretty much only a symptom that’s treatable with SSRI(Google it) and some people respond positively, some respond INCREDIBLY negatively, and some not at all. It’s weird shit man.
Ruth’s Emotionally Sound Adventure
curious Non- American here
Are those real restaurant chains or did Willis make them up?
They are slightly altered versions of the restaurants available at the Read dining hall at IU
I know, I know, I’m late to the party, but:
I just love Happy Ruth …!! <3
Happy Ruth is a gift we can all enjoy, with no expiration date!
… I hope.
This comic tells me EXACTLY what meds Ruth is on – because they’re the same ones I’m on
And what meds are those?
The gooooooood shit
Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!
On another note, it’s sort of weird that Asma’s job seems to be only front desk woman. Is she not a student? If she is, then it seems unlikely they could schedule all the hours that they need to keep the front desk open. If she’s not, then it’s not very efficient to hire someone full time for a job like that when they can just switch off desk duty between RA’s.
There are other front desk people, but if I show them, that’s less Asma.
Not all heroes wear capes.
She is actually identical quintuplets with telepathy.
I love that someone wrote “red” over “center” on the front desk
Actually it says “Read”, just like the actual Read Hall.
Heck yeah, Ruth. You go be happy. You’ve been without that for a while.
When I was coming out of my depressive episode it was a lot more gradual. Like I woke up one morning and realized I couldn’t remember the last time I really seriously considered suicide. Or I realized that it had been years since I last even wanted to self-insured. Coming out of depression was as slow and insidious as falling into it was for me.
“Hey…I could write a poem about this. Like I haven’t done in years.”
“This book is more than just a thing to do to pass the time. I’m…enjoying it. It’s…fun.”
“I’m crying because this particular song playing at this particular time of day is just so pretty. Is–is that allowed?”
“Hey, the sun on my skin is warm. It’s… Nice. Wait, when was the last time I enjoyed the weather? That’s possible?!”
I appreciate the positive imagery depicting antidepressants.
There still seems to be a stigma in regard to that particular medication, in that it… numbs you. No. No it does not. It lets you be you.
Good on you, Willis, good on you.
I want it all… I want it aaaaall!
I want it all… and I want it noooow!
Adventure seeker on an empty street…
Just an alley creeper, light on her feet
A young fighter screaming, with no time for doubt…
With the pain and anger can’t see a way out
It ain’t much I’m asking, I heard her say:
Gotta find me a future, move outta my waaaaay!
I want it all, I want it aaall, I want it aaall, and I want it now!
I want it all, I want it aaall, I want it aaall, and I want it NOOOW!
I’ve been on and off various antidepressants my entire life. I’ve never really liked food all that well, although I eat better when I’m not depressed.
About two years ago, I started on Remeron, which isn’t very popular because it increases appetite as a side effect.
But it’s perfect for me, and it’s AMAZING. I actually get hungry for food, instead of just “I need to eat because my body needs fuel, just put calories in me, so annoying.” I’d never experienced it before, and I LOVE IT.
im jelly
What kind of meds did she get and why don’t mine have this kind of effect?
Yay Ruth
Amsa is right to be alarmed. Has she ever seen Ruth running except in an emergency? And she might not recognize that expression of ruth’s Face, since she has never seen it before.
“Rage…? No, I’ve seen that. Anger-rage? Blood-rage? Spite-rage…?”
Willis doesn’t do many strips which are nearly silent. This example has just one line, and it’s boffo.
I Feel Fantastic
Seeing Ruth happy puts a smile on my face. Take that depression!