Dumbing of Age Book Twelve

Dumbing of Age

A college webcomic by David Willis
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May 12, 2026

Bandage

by David M Willis on November 9, 2011 at 12:01 am
  • 01 - Pajama Jeans
└ Tags: joyce, sarah

Discussion (160) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. JackNapier
    JackNapier
    November 9, 2011 at 12:01 am | #

    This could take some explaining. Where’s a chalkboard when you need it?

    • NCP19
      NCP19
      November 9, 2011 at 12:03 am | #

      Sarah’s got some ‘splainin’ to do…

      • Canvas Hat
        Canvas Hat
        November 9, 2011 at 12:10 am | #

        Some serious ‘splaining. Serious Joeing ‘splaining.

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          November 9, 2011 at 12:29 am | #

          We need Faz here to explain it all.

          • Mkvenner
            Mkvenner
            November 9, 2011 at 12:50 am | #

            NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!

            • calendarman27
              calendarman27
              November 9, 2011 at 2:02 am | #

              i hope she’s not all “no it can’t be! he was gonna be my husband” that will cause a huge fight with sarah and im really liking the big sister/little sister dynamic they’ve got going

            • Wandering Meme
              Wandering Meme
              November 9, 2011 at 3:31 am | #

              Yes yes yes! Faz, the fountain of ultimate wisdom can enlighten us with his bar-graph of truthiness.

              “…This line represents ‘x’, where x is the amount of roofies in your system, multiplied by the measurement of the bulge in your stomach, all divided by the inverse of the likelihood of pastorson McRapist being brought on the maury show by you. “

          • Ess
            Ess
            November 9, 2011 at 11:40 pm | #

            Forget Faz, bring in Clarissa, please!

            • Joebo
              Joebo
              November 10, 2011 at 2:37 pm | #

              As in she who explains it all?

    • Kalan
      Kalan
      November 9, 2011 at 3:50 am | #

      Robin’s campaign office

      • Wandering Meme
        Wandering Meme
        November 9, 2011 at 6:12 am | #

        Where a scandal is about to break out…

    • Elintepic
      Elintepic
      December 12, 2012 at 11:55 pm | #

      Now she has the same hand as the scout

  2. freefall
    freefall
    November 9, 2011 at 12:01 am | #

    Noooooo Joyce.

  3. Jen Aside
    Jen Aside
    November 9, 2011 at 12:01 am | #

    “He wasn’t hurt was he?? I would just DIE if he was!! D= “

    • calendarman27
      calendarman27
      November 9, 2011 at 1:59 am | #

      “because i’d neeeeeeeever do anything violent” *cough cough* Joe *cough cough*

      • calendarman27
        calendarman27
        November 9, 2011 at 2:00 am | #

        not that i dont totally think ryan deserved that and so much more.

  4. Nilla
    Nilla
    November 9, 2011 at 12:02 am | #

    Poor Joyce 🙁

  5. David Herbert
    David Herbert
    November 9, 2011 at 12:02 am | #

    But does she remember being queen of the drunks? She can’t forget her people.

    • fellixe
      fellixe
      November 9, 2011 at 12:08 am | #

      Or “big sister”?

      • Digidestined of Trust
        Digidestined of Trust
        November 9, 2011 at 12:10 am | #

        That was while she was asleep. She wasn’t aware of anything at that point.

      • Canvas Hat
        Canvas Hat
        November 9, 2011 at 12:11 am | #

        Yeah, “sis” can lead the drunks in her place…

  6. calendarman27
    calendarman27
    November 9, 2011 at 12:02 am | #

    “do you have anymore of that delicious sprite?”

    • NCP19
      NCP19
      November 9, 2011 at 12:03 am | #

      IT WAS TERRIBLE SIERRA MIST. THE DEVIL’S DRINK.

      • Wandering Meme
        Wandering Meme
        November 9, 2011 at 3:35 am | #

        She only drinks drugged Sierra Mist! Not that weak stuff!

  7. The Sound Defense
    The Sound Defense
    November 9, 2011 at 12:03 am | #

    It’s going to be fun for me to watch, at least.

    …that’s probably not a good sign.

  8. A. Colunga
    A. Colunga
    November 9, 2011 at 12:03 am | #

    What is the religious equivalent to falling off the wagon called?

    • Mkvenner
      Mkvenner
      November 9, 2011 at 12:05 am | #

      Heretic?

    • MM
      MM
      November 9, 2011 at 12:09 am | #

      Turning plowshares into swords?

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      November 9, 2011 at 12:13 am | #

      Going prodigal?

      • Wandering Meme
        Wandering Meme
        November 9, 2011 at 4:36 am | #

        Compared to what she did to ryan’s face, which was “going ape$#!+”

      • Another Commenter
        Another Commenter
        November 9, 2011 at 10:24 am | #

        Prodigal actually doesn’t mean what most people thinks it means.

        • Bekah
          Bekah
          November 9, 2011 at 11:52 am | #

          A person who spends money in a recklessly extravagant way?

          • Michelle J Caboose
            Michelle J Caboose
            November 10, 2011 at 6:41 am | #

            Prodigal refers to the word “prodigy.” The “prodigal son” was basically “the talented one.” The one who was expected to “be somebody.”

            A man had two sons, one of whom was expected to go on to do great things, because he was so talented/smart/whatever. The talented (or prodigal) son left home and basically learned that it doesn’t matter how gifted you are, being a success requires work. He wasted all his money and goofed off, and wound up broke and homeless.

            I’m sure you know how the rest of the story goes.

            tl,dr: “prodigal” does not mean “spendthrift” or “wandering.” It’s the word “prodigy” as an adjective.

            • Bekah
              Bekah
              November 10, 2011 at 8:48 pm | #

              According to the OED, you’re about as wrong as wrong gets.

            • David
              David M Willis
              November 10, 2011 at 11:07 pm | #

              Origin of PRODIGAL

              Latin prodigus, from prodigere to drive away, squander, from pro-, prod- forth + agere to drive — more at pro-, agent

        • Valerie
          Valerie
          November 9, 2011 at 11:27 pm | #

          Wandering, right? Lost? Something like that?

    • Canvas Hat
      Canvas Hat
      November 9, 2011 at 12:14 am | #

      I think it’s universally called a bruise, and possible fractures. How high off the ground is this wagon?

      • taekwondogirl
        taekwondogirl
        November 9, 2011 at 4:02 pm | #

        That got a laugh out of me. Well done.

    • Mkvenner
      Mkvenner
      November 9, 2011 at 12:14 am | #

      Schism?

    • Mkvenner
      Mkvenner
      November 9, 2011 at 12:15 am | #

      Mormon?

    • Valdrax
      Valdrax
      November 9, 2011 at 12:25 am | #

      Being a holy roller?

    • StClair
      StClair
      November 9, 2011 at 12:34 am | #

      Apostasy.

    • Aniphx
      Aniphx
      November 9, 2011 at 12:35 am | #

      I believe most would call it backsliding.

      • Aizat
        Aizat
        November 9, 2011 at 2:01 am | #

        A wagon? I’LL STEAL IT! NO ONE WILL EVER KNOW!

        • DSL
          DSL
          November 12, 2011 at 4:02 pm | #

          That makes you the pro from Dover, boy.

    • Wandering Meme
      Wandering Meme
      November 9, 2011 at 3:39 am | #

      “What is backsliding? Religious colloquialisms for $400 Alex.”

      • a99steaksauce
        a99steaksauce
        November 10, 2011 at 9:55 am | #

        Lets get ryan in on this.

    • Björn
      Björn
      November 9, 2011 at 2:36 pm | #

      “Losing my religion”?

    • begbert2
      begbert2
      November 9, 2011 at 3:24 pm | #

      Doubting.

    • mickeyten
      mickeyten
      November 18, 2011 at 1:41 am | #

      Lapse, actually. As in “a lapsed catholic.”

  9. Mkvenner
    Mkvenner
    November 9, 2011 at 12:04 am | #

    Nobody has seen him since.

    State Troopers are preparing to search lake monroe.

    • Wandering Meme
      Wandering Meme
      November 9, 2011 at 4:46 am | #

      Amazi-girl missed him when he mindlessly wandered into that gay bikers club, making indiscernable moaning sounds with his pants hanging off his ankles.

      No one ever saw him again.

      • Mkvenner
        Mkvenner
        November 9, 2011 at 10:59 am | #

        Who said it was Amazi-girl?

      • shoeboxjeddy
        shoeboxjeddy
        November 9, 2011 at 8:44 pm | #

        Dude, HE was the rapist. Why you gotta make homosexual bikers into rapists to punish him? That’s messed up…

        • a99steaksauce
          a99steaksauce
          November 10, 2011 at 9:58 am | #

          As messed up as kicking a man while he’s down with a scar in god knows where?

  10. Muffinivorous
    Muffinivorous
    November 9, 2011 at 12:04 am | #

    Oh dear. I’m no expert but I’d say this sets back any chance of a police report in one of Ryan’s orifices. I’m hoping that it all comes back to her, and not just because of that…the idea of any kind of permanent memory loss for her is actually really scary.

    • T Campbell
      T Campbell
      November 9, 2011 at 12:13 am | #

      As I understand it, she’s just lost most of the evening. It’s retrograde, not anterograde amnesia like in Memento or Finding Nemo.

      FWIW, Joyce’s memory loss probably means that any chance of prosecuting Ryan was doomed from the start, no matter what decisions Joyce, Dorothy, Billie and Sarah made after hitting him.

      • Canvas Hat
        Canvas Hat
        November 9, 2011 at 12:17 am | #

        Blurry amnesia?

      • R
        R
        November 9, 2011 at 12:44 am | #

        Her lack of going to a hospital to get her blood drawn and tested for the drug doomed her chance of being able to prosecute Ryan. Sexual assault is hard to convict, attempted sexual assault is harder, attempted sexual assault in a “date”-ish setting (they were seen talking happily earlier by a number of people) is excessively hard.

        • Asuka L.S.
          Asuka L.S.
          November 9, 2011 at 3:37 pm | #

          DING-DING-DING! We have a winner!

          Still, there are other ways to make Ryan pay than the legal channels. As a commenter below has stated, he has a characteristic wound and an entire party’s worth of witnesses to his deeds. Even if the police are unable to act upon him, the entire campus is well aware by now that he’s a raping bastard. If he should ever return to an IU party, he WILL be recognized.

          Of course, he could just hop over to another campus’ parties, but the power of electronic social networks is such that he will never be totally safe to prowl again.

      • Wandering Meme
        Wandering Meme
        November 9, 2011 at 3:45 am | #

        Whew…well, that makes things simpler…

        …now they just have to castrate him.

    • Historyman68
      Historyman68
      November 9, 2011 at 12:14 am | #

      Oh god, more memory loss for Joyce?

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        November 9, 2011 at 12:20 am | #

        Joyce has dealt with more cases of amnesia than the cast of Smallville.

        • Zuche
          Zuche
          November 9, 2011 at 12:48 am | #

          A show she doesn’t recall watching, by the way.

          • Creativerealms
            Creativerealms
            November 9, 2011 at 7:34 am | #

            Which makes Joyce luckier then the some. I wish I could forget most of Smallville.

        • Mancuso
          Mancuso
          November 9, 2011 at 1:48 am | #

          That was in another comicverse, guys… remember what David so politely asked us.

          • begbert2
            begbert2
            November 9, 2011 at 3:43 pm | #

            To stop claiming that Ethan is gay?

        • Wandering Meme
          Wandering Meme
          November 9, 2011 at 6:09 am | #

          I loved the blur! But why did he look so much like clark kent?

      • Wandering Meme
        Wandering Meme
        November 9, 2011 at 3:49 am | #

        And now she’s gonna fall in looooove with walky. which will create a weird triangle what with dorothy being in the picture…

    • Kalan
      Kalan
      November 9, 2011 at 3:59 am | #

      What likely happened is the effects of the drug interfered with her short-term memory getting processed and stored in long-term memory. Basically the neural equivalent of not saving and letting the temp files delete. It affects the later part of the evening but shouldn’t extend past that. Unless Willis has plans for that.

      • Gargamel
        Gargamel
        November 9, 2011 at 8:43 am | #

        I’m actually surprised she doesn’t remember Ryan shouting. When my gf was drugged she could remember a few minutes after the event.

        • lauren
          lauren
          November 9, 2011 at 12:39 pm | #

          When I was I didn’t remember conversations had with people starting pretty much from the moment it happened. Sane and rational conversations held with people that would provide no indication I’d just been drugged. But I still remembered everything before.

        • begbert2
          begbert2
          November 9, 2011 at 3:27 pm | #

          There’s actually reason to believe that some time passed between when she started sipping his drink and when the bathroom finally opened up – she complained of the delay.

  11. Mkvenner
    Mkvenner
    November 9, 2011 at 12:05 am | #

    Bat credit card.

    • OneBeardToRuleThemAll
      OneBeardToRuleThemAll
      November 9, 2011 at 12:08 am | #

      Dont.Tempt.Me.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      November 9, 2011 at 12:14 am | #

      Are you trying to make things worse? 😛

      • Canvas Hat
        Canvas Hat
        November 9, 2011 at 12:18 am | #

        Ice puns would be making things worse….

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          November 9, 2011 at 12:27 am | #

          Ice puns wouldn’t stand a snowflake in hell’s chance in today’s comments.

          • Shade743
            Shade743
            November 9, 2011 at 11:22 am | #

            Ice-ee what you did there.

            • begbert2
              begbert2
              November 9, 2011 at 3:47 pm | #

              Cool it, you guys.

              • Plasma Mongoose
                Plasma Mongoose
                November 9, 2011 at 4:25 pm | #

                JUst chill out everyone.

        • Zuche
          Zuche
          November 9, 2011 at 12:49 am | #

          No, if you’re Denny O’Neill, it just doesn’t get worse than the Bat credit card.

  12. Confuzor
    Confuzor
    November 9, 2011 at 12:07 am | #

    “welllll, other than the gash on his face and broken ribs….”

  13. MM
    MM
    November 9, 2011 at 12:08 am | #

    Look on the bright side, Sarah. After your little confession, at least you don’t have to deal with “You like me! You really, really like me!”

  14. Caffienated
    Caffienated
    November 9, 2011 at 12:09 am | #

    Uh oh, this can’t be good.

  15. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    November 9, 2011 at 12:09 am | #

    We need someone with great understanding, maturity and sensitivity to talk to Joyce about last night, unfortunately Mike isn’t around. 😛

    • Jacob
      Jacob
      November 9, 2011 at 12:33 am | #

      He’s off Joeing your mom. For a nickel.

      • Wandering Meme
        Wandering Meme
        November 9, 2011 at 3:52 am | #

        In her faaaaaaaace…or her Faaaaaaaaz!

        • madd
          madd
          November 9, 2011 at 1:14 pm | #

          With no paaaaants.

          • Björn
            Björn
            November 9, 2011 at 2:42 pm | #

            But with his penis.

    • a99steaksauce
      a99steaksauce
      November 10, 2011 at 10:06 am | #

      “It is unfortunate for me to say, but the man you speak of drugged you and attempted to go have sex with you. However, you were saved by your friend Sarah.”
      Is that any good?

  16. Wistful
    Wistful
    November 9, 2011 at 12:09 am | #

    Oh man, that just made me laugh out loud. I feel like such a bad person. How dare I laugh at Sarah’s exasperation.

  17. iggzy
    iggzy
    November 9, 2011 at 12:11 am | #

    This will get interesting. Maybe Amazi-Girl can help

  18. Digidestined of Trust
    Digidestined of Trust
    November 9, 2011 at 12:11 am | #

    Oh boy. Hate to break it to ya Joyce…… Where’s the mind wiper when you need it so we can reverse it to get her to remember. Though it’d probably be best to make her forget being at the party altogether.

    • T Campbell
      T Campbell
      November 9, 2011 at 12:14 am | #

      Oh, geez, the mind wiper. I totally missed THAT little parallel.

      • Digidestined of Trust
        Digidestined of Trust
        November 9, 2011 at 12:48 am | #

        I almost did too, but I was trying to figure out the easiest way to break it to her and that came up. Unfortunately, the Mind Wiper had quite a few setbacks in it so it might not work too well.

  19. Leon Real
    Leon Real
    November 9, 2011 at 12:26 am | #

    That depends on the perspective, Sarah.

  20. Organs
    Organs
    November 9, 2011 at 12:35 am | #

    Call me slow on the uptake, but I’m getting that de ja vu feeling…

    • fellixe
      fellixe
      November 9, 2011 at 12:43 pm | #

      Not again!

  21. Matt Boyd
    Matt Boyd
    November 9, 2011 at 12:36 am | #

    “Losing your faith” or “apostasy,” depending on how hard you do it.

    • Matt Boyd
      Matt Boyd
      November 9, 2011 at 12:37 am | #

      This was supposed to go under the thread about falling off religious wagons.

  22. Ancestral Hamster
    Ancestral Hamster
    November 9, 2011 at 12:37 am | #

    Normally, you sit the victim down when giving them bad news. Looks like Sarah needs to sit down instead. (With something strong after.)

  23. ScytheAkse
    ScytheAkse
    November 9, 2011 at 12:38 am | #

    Poor girl =/

  24. Aizat
    Aizat
    November 9, 2011 at 12:40 am | #

    No he’s not fine, Joyce. He’s probably in the hospital judging by how bad Sarah beat the tar out of him.

    • Shifty
      Shifty
      November 9, 2011 at 12:15 pm | #

      To say nothing of the massive cut Joyce herself inflicted on him.

      • Björn
        Björn
        November 9, 2011 at 2:50 pm | #

        A huge scar over the face–inflicted by the protagonist–gives him great possibility to become the strip’s cloaked/masked supervillain.

        • narmenduke
          narmenduke
          November 9, 2011 at 4:44 pm | #

          Ohpleaseohpleaseohplease let that culminate in a massive fight across campus between him and Amazi-girl in which many buildings are destroyed.

        • MarcinMN
          MarcinMN
          November 9, 2011 at 11:28 pm | #

          He can go all Phantom of the Opera with a mask over half his face. =P

  25. alicemacher
    alicemacher
    November 9, 2011 at 12:41 am | #

    Whether Willis intended for us to do so or not, I find tonight’s strip very sad. I’ve a feeling Joyce will never quite be the same again after Sarah tells her what the “nice pastor’s boy” was up to. ;__;

    • ScytheAkse
      ScytheAkse
      November 9, 2011 at 2:24 am | #

      agreed

    • begbert2
      begbert2
      November 9, 2011 at 3:57 pm | #

      On the other hand, she seems to have recovered just fine after Joe’s betrayal of her expectations. So maybe she’ll write Ryan off as another ‘Mr Wrong’ and move straight on to the next Mr Right.

      • taekwondogirl
        taekwondogirl
        November 9, 2011 at 4:07 pm | #

        Joe didn’t really do anything actually *evil*, though. She also went into the date knowing he’s Jewish and the idea that she would convert him.

        If you’re as naive as Joyce, learning that people can outright lie to you (Joe didn’t, Ryan did) about being good in order to take advantage of you in one of the worst ways… that’s kind of earth shattering.

        • begbert2
          begbert2
          November 9, 2011 at 8:32 pm | #

          I’m just saying I can see it going either way – especially since she doesn’t actually remember the betrayal. She could still be shattered by the second-hand account, but alternatively she could fail to internalize it and, after a troubled morning/day/week, fall back into her usual mindset.

          • taekwondogirl
            taekwondogirl
            November 9, 2011 at 11:32 pm | #

            Hmm, that’s true…

    • narmenduke
      narmenduke
      November 9, 2011 at 4:46 pm | #

      What I fear is that she’ll refuse to believe Sarah. *crosses fingers in fervent hope that this isn’t the case*

  26. Locke
    Locke
    November 9, 2011 at 1:01 am | #

    “He’s probably fine, he just got a gash in the face, as well as some blunt head trauma. HINT HINT.”

    • Khrene Cleaver
      Khrene Cleaver
      November 9, 2011 at 1:41 am | #

      Ah I see what you did there… For a nickel.

      Oh and it seems the the f word has been replaced with “Joe;” well met Mr.Willis very well met.

      • Rikushadow5
        Rikushadow5
        November 9, 2011 at 2:37 am | #

        Wait, what? Does it really? Fuck.

        • Rikushadow5
          Rikushadow5
          November 9, 2011 at 2:39 am | #

          >.>
          <.<
          This has been a test of the emergency broadcast system. This was only a test. If there'd been a real emergency, it'd be something like "HELP HELPUS PLEASE, FOR THE LOVE OF ALL HUMANITY!! NO NO NO!!"

          Thank you.

      • Locke
        Locke
        November 9, 2011 at 3:57 pm | #

        Wait, really? Motherjoe-er.

  27. Uniqueantique
    Uniqueantique
    November 9, 2011 at 1:28 am | #

    Joyce had been handling herself really well up until a**hole made his rush at her and Sarah showed him the error of his ways..so to speak.
    Joyce may just come through this better than Sarah thinks she will. She was attacked, she fought back, friends helped her. Now all they have to do is ‘find’ the ‘body’ that crawled away…

  28. Brendan
    Brendan
    November 9, 2011 at 1:40 am | #

    I’m kind of surprised she says “that doesn’t sound like me.” Again, from everything we’ve seen of her, here and in the Walkyverse, since she’s female, she’s probably had “A HEATHEN WILL RAPE YOU” drilled into her brain, and as casually as she broke the glass on his face, I doubt it would be beyond the realm of her sober mind.

    • Aizat
      Aizat
      November 9, 2011 at 2:02 am | #

      So what you’re saying is that Joyce was not herself when she broke the glass on Ryan’s face?

      • lawzlo
        lawzlo
        November 9, 2011 at 3:28 am | #

        She was possessed!

    • begbert2
      begbert2
      November 9, 2011 at 3:33 pm | #

      Joyce probably doesn’t acknowledge that “rage Joyce” is part of her personality. If you asked her, she probably would fail to recall that she personally participated in beating Joe – the whole evening’s failure would undoubtedly be his own doing.

      • taekwondogirl
        taekwondogirl
        November 9, 2011 at 4:08 pm | #

        This.

  29. aaron_bourque
    aaron_bourque
    November 9, 2011 at 2:51 am | #

    He was drugged too. Also, coincidentally, he’s got scars like someone attacked him with a broken bottle. Also, he looks just like the guy who drugged you. But the nice pastor boy went back home. Yeah.

    • Michelle J Caboose
      Michelle J Caboose
      November 10, 2011 at 6:56 am | #

      Imaginary panel 6:

      Sarah: “Actually, he died before the party. The rapist killed him and wore his skin to lure you into having sex.”

      Joyce makes a face like the “Scream” painting.

  30. Kelvin
    Kelvin
    November 9, 2011 at 3:44 am | #

    Really loving this dynamic between Joyce and Sarah. ^_^ Can’t wait to see more.

    And yes, Joyce. He went home…to KINGDOM COME! MWAHAHAH! >:D

  31. Dr.Z
    Dr.Z
    November 9, 2011 at 5:55 am | #

    And this is one of the reasons they should have called for an ambulance.

  32. Acher4
    Acher4
    November 9, 2011 at 7:59 am | #

    I know that it was mostly hinted that Joyce was going to be okay.
    But today i finally let a huge ‘phew’ seeing her really ok after the whole ordeal.
    Damn you Willis for taking 1 1/2 week to show her. 😛

  33. Joraiem
    Joraiem
    November 9, 2011 at 8:01 am | #

    Is panel 2 the only time we’ve ever seen Sarah without angry eyes?

    • taekwondogirl
      taekwondogirl
      November 9, 2011 at 4:09 pm | #

      No… when she was watching over Joyce in bed, she wasn’t wearing them.

  34. Webcomic Addict
    Webcomic Addict
    November 9, 2011 at 8:45 am | #

    Okay, on one hand, if real world logic applies here, he’s not going to get arrested or prosecuted. On the other, by now the entire campus knows what he did. He’s got obvious facial lacerations, internal contusions, broken bones, etc. He’d better get used to severe injuries, because I don’t see this campus letting him off easy.

    • G.S.Mercs
      G.S.Mercs
      November 9, 2011 at 6:25 pm | #

      Assuming, of course, he’s a student. I don’t recall if he was or not. I don’t believe he is

  35. ryan
    ryan
    November 9, 2011 at 8:57 am | #

    and now joyce is reminding me of aunt may from the 90s cartoon. always calling every supervillain she casually meets “a nice young man”.

  36. Lord Synick XXIII
    Lord Synick XXIII
    November 9, 2011 at 10:29 am | #

    …

    …….

    In his FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACE?

    • Lord Synick XXIII
      Lord Synick XXIII
      November 11, 2011 at 12:39 am | #

      And I’m the Head Alien. Must have been the inclusion of ‘Lord’.

  37. Kernanator
    Kernanator
    November 9, 2011 at 11:05 am | #

    Time for SOUL CRUSH.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      November 9, 2011 at 4:24 pm | #

      It’s bad enough already that her masturbating hand is injured, she doesn’t need more bad news.

      • Rex Hondo
        Rex Hondo
        November 9, 2011 at 11:25 pm | #

        Just means she has to cross-train. It’s not that hard to do…

  38. sockv
    sockv
    November 9, 2011 at 11:14 am | #

    …and Ryan files a police report saying she got drunk and assaulted him.

    • Shifty
      Shifty
      November 9, 2011 at 12:14 pm | #

      That’s what I fear.

    • MM
      MM
      November 9, 2011 at 2:09 pm | #

      Which will go nowhere once the police get a look at those guileless baby blues and the other witnesses turn it into a he said/she said. If Ryan’s smart, he’ll realize his best bet is just to let this fade into obscurity.

      Of course, if Ryan were smart, he wouldn’t have done this or lost his temper in the first place, so who knows?

      • begbert2
        begbert2
        November 9, 2011 at 3:40 pm | #

        Seriously! If he’d just stayed calm for five minutes longer, he would have had a happy fun evening and got away scot free. That is literally all it would have taken.

        Isn’t that a joyous thought?

      • Shifty
        Shifty
        November 9, 2011 at 7:23 pm | #

        Unfortunately, even Joyce’s big blue eyes might not help her. Joyce didn’t go to the police or the hospital when it happened. She doesn’t remember Ryan drugging her, and can’t prove it was him who did it, particularly when the party has such a big group of people there. Sarah, who saved Joyce, is the only one who saw Ryan assaulting her, and then she proceeded to beat the crap out of him with a baseball bat. People saw Sarah do this, but didn’t see Ryan do anything. Because the girls didn’t take immediate action and go to the proper authorities, there is now no evidence that Ryan actual did anything to Joyce. Unless they can find evidence, Ryan could easily get off scott-free unfortunately.

  39. Shifty
    Shifty
    November 9, 2011 at 12:14 pm | #

    Ugh… this is so sad. And I really worry about what the aftermath of this is going to be. Particularly since they never went to the hospital or called the police.

  40. ziggy78eog
    ziggy78eog
    November 9, 2011 at 12:21 pm | #

    Whoooooooo, boy, no matter how Sarah tries to approach this, it is going to be awkward.

  41. Professor Zoot
    Professor Zoot
    November 9, 2011 at 2:07 pm | #

    The pastor’s son is dead, he was killed by Darth Ryan.

  42. begbert2
    begbert2
    November 9, 2011 at 3:46 pm | #

    Wait – how does Sarah know that Joyce is talking about Ryan? She didn’t discuss his upbringing with him before she beaned him, nor did any of the rest of our heroes. For all Sarah knows Joyce could be talking about somebody else.

    • Joraiem
      Joraiem
      November 9, 2011 at 4:50 pm | #

      She was around in the comic where Joyce was accusing him of not being a pastor’s son. Presumably she overheard.

  43. Steven
    Steven
    November 9, 2011 at 3:54 pm | #

    I was always under the impression that a cup was either a unit of measurement or a small liquid container not made of glass.

  44. nothri
    nothri
    November 9, 2011 at 4:52 pm | #

    This should be pretty easy to explain, actually. Just mention how Joe was also theoretically religious (being from a jewish family and all) but turned out to be kind of a sleeze, then show her that “powers of ten” video and explain that this guy was basically the entire universe if Joe is planet earth.

  45. nothri
    nothri
    November 9, 2011 at 4:52 pm | #

    This should be pretty easy to explain, actually. Just mention how Joe was also theoretically religious (being from a jewish family and all) but turned out to be kind of a sleeze, then show her that “powers of ten” video and explain that this guy was basically the entire universe if Joe is planet earth.

  46. Kalan
    Kalan
    November 9, 2011 at 4:58 pm | #

    Soooo…Joyce isn’t wearing pants either?

    • JA
      JA
      November 9, 2011 at 7:14 pm | #

      Pants not necessary.

    • begbert2
      begbert2
      November 9, 2011 at 8:43 pm | #

      So far in this storyline, only Amber, Walky, and Sarah have been confirmed to be wearing pants. Dina, Mike, and Joyce (and Sal) could easily have been wearing underwear or less in the shots seen so far. And Walkywas only confirmed to be pantsed when he left his bedroom; his status while talking to Mike and browsing womens’ clothing online was unknown.

      Just so you know!

  47. Valerie
    Valerie
    November 9, 2011 at 11:24 pm | #

    Oh God, poor Joyce. And poor Sarah for having to explain it.

  48. DarkoNeko
    DarkoNeko
    April 13, 2015 at 7:13 pm | #

    …nope, it’s not.

  49. BrokenEye, True False Prophet
    BrokenEye, True False Prophet
    September 16, 2015 at 10:21 pm | #

    “Then I heard a human voice coming from between the banks of the Ulai. It called out, “Gabriel, enable this person to understand the vision.””

    Daniel 8:16

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