Dumbing of Age Book Twelve

Dumbing of Age

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June 8, 2026

Wha-wha-wha?

by David M Willis on September 6, 2021 at 12:01 am
  • 01 – Sister, Christian
└ Tags: danny, joe

Discussion (168) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. Ana Chronistic
    Ana Chronistic
    September 6, 2021 at 12:03 am | #

    HOTNESS = SCARINESS, didn’t you know

    • Kyrik Michalowski
      Kyrik Michalowski
      September 6, 2021 at 1:39 am | #

      What about ugliness being equal to scariness? Because if I’m stuck being ugly then I should at least be scary.

      • Reltzik
        Reltzik
        September 6, 2021 at 8:29 am | #

        You have to be at least three standard deviatons off from the mean. Between Nosferatu and Carmilla (she was scary to SOME people, I think) lies the dreaded unscary valley.

        • Clif
          Clif
          September 6, 2021 at 11:22 am | #

          True. But you also have to allow for the fact that humans can adopt to almost anything.

          • Taellosse
            Taellosse
            September 6, 2021 at 12:33 pm | #

            I feel like you probably meant adapt, though your word choice is weirdly accurate as well?

            • Clif
              Clif
              September 6, 2021 at 10:19 pm | #

              Rented fingers.

    • Decidedly Orthogonal
      Decidedly Orthogonal
      September 6, 2021 at 7:48 pm | #

      Maybe this will be good for the S.S. Joeyce. Joe can see that looks aren’t everything and maybe Joyce /could/ like him for being something more than being a McBeef. If Joe can see Sal seeing something in Danny like, maybe *maybe* he can extrapolate.

      …

      maybe

  2. Doctor_Who
    Doctor_Who
    September 6, 2021 at 12:04 am | #

    Danny’s opinion of Sal.

    • Wagstaff
      Wagstaff
      September 6, 2021 at 12:14 am | #

      Yeah, basically.

      Besides Sal, what other characters here do you think would be able to perform Death by Snu Snu?

      • Doctor_Who
        Doctor_Who
        September 6, 2021 at 12:20 am | #

        I’m not convinced Dina wouldn’t take her dinosaur thing a little too far and incorporate a lot of biting.

        Which is, y’know, kinky fun if done right, but human bites can be quite dangerous if not done with care, our mouths are gross.

        • Wagstaff
          Wagstaff
          September 6, 2021 at 1:29 am | #

          On that note, I haven’t seen any of the Slipshines, but I sure hope the characters in them were wise enough to brush their teeth and wash out their mouths before performing oral sex!

      • Needfuldoer
        Needfuldoer
        September 6, 2021 at 6:56 am | #

        Amazi-Girl, and probably Amber.

  3. Thag Simmons
    Thag Simmons
    September 6, 2021 at 12:04 am | #

    Also, y’know, you’ve seen her kick the crap out of a superhero.

    • Nono
      Nono
      September 6, 2021 at 12:08 am | #

      Wasn’t that kind of a draw?

      • Thag Simmons
        Thag Simmons
        September 6, 2021 at 12:11 am | #

        Not really

        • Sirksome
          Sirksome
          September 6, 2021 at 12:18 am | #

          It’s a little more ambiguous than that because it’s implied Amber may have just given up at the end to let Sal kill her….which is all kinds of uncomfortable to think about for both of them.

          • Sirksome
            Sirksome
            September 6, 2021 at 12:26 am | #

            Here’s the strip that implies it in a rather dark conversation between Ruth and Amber.

            https://www.dumbingofage.com/2019/comic/book-9-comic/02-but-the-sun-still-shines/communityservice/

        • BarerMender
          BarerMender
          September 6, 2021 at 12:33 am | #

          It doesn’t count if the hero let her do it.

          • Thag Simmons
            Thag Simmons
            September 6, 2021 at 12:53 am | #

            It doesn’t become a draw just because you took a dive

            • Delavan
              Delavan
              September 6, 2021 at 12:53 pm | #

              No, it becomes an illegitimate underground fight that doesn’t count for measuring purposes.

              Why would MegaloBox lie to us?

  4. Sirksome
    Sirksome
    September 6, 2021 at 12:05 am | #

    Danny has made solid points I approve of! But also Sal is totally into him and he’s been doing a good job of playing it cool.

    • Jenn
      Jenn
      September 6, 2021 at 12:08 am | #

      Yeah, I’ll admit that I was originally rooting for “close boy+girl friendship, not romantic” when this whole thing started, because we don’t get a lot of that in American media.

      • Sirksome
        Sirksome
        September 6, 2021 at 12:16 am | #

        It can still happen I think. Part of the reason the dynamic has worked so far is because they work well as friends. Even if it transfers over to something more romantic I don’t think we’ll lose that energy. The real problem is there aren’t really that many relationships to show in the comic so far. Most of the guys don’t hang out with the girls except for Walky. Joe’s totally sex obsessed so there’s not really much to work with for close platonic friendships.

        • Spencer
          Spencer
          September 6, 2021 at 12:39 am | #

          Yeah I think it’s just that a lot of the main dynamics between characters have been romantic and Sal and Danny have been each other’s primary dynamic since the timeskip.

          So you’ll see Joe/Dina talk about stuff in biology class, but Joe’s “main” relationships are with Danny and Joyce

      • StClair
        StClair
        September 6, 2021 at 12:35 am | #

        We don’t, no.
        But I never really thought that’s where this was going.

        • Spencer
          Spencer
          September 6, 2021 at 12:49 am | #

          Yeah I was pretty adamant it’d never happen. There’s no drama since they already get along so well, it’s like Danny getting rewarded for outgrowing his oldest white knight behaviour (where the hell did this come from?).

          It’s times like these I remember I am not a professional writer for over two decades who intimately understands these character dynamics through being the one who made them.

          • milu
            milu
            September 6, 2021 at 10:10 am | #

            hm! interesting point! i don’t see it.

            sure, that’s how Joe might see it, but within this story Sal is a fleshed-out character with agency, not an empty hotness signifier.

            …re-read the whole sal+danny tag just now, and i really don’t see how this relationship (which has been foreshadowed for a while) can be reduced to the sort of trope you describe. Danny has been a bit of a jerk at times but he’s been super decent towards Sal herself, except for a couple inappropriate comments about her physique early on. i don’t remember him being white-knightish to other characters, but he hasn’t had that attitude towards Sal.

            this arc might be less for the benefit of Danny (who doesn’t seem especially unhappy with singlehood) and more for Sal’s. So far she’s the one whose story is getting some serious mileage out of this.

            • milu
              milu
              September 6, 2021 at 10:13 am | #

              that was unclear

              *i don’t remember him being white-knightish to other characters, but having checked just now, he for sure hasn’t had that attitude towards Sal.

              • Spencer
                Spencer
                September 6, 2021 at 11:36 am | #

                Well, I didn’t say it was right.

                Danny at the start of the comic was a bit of a twerp about the women in his life. He never tried to pressure Dorothy into giving up on Yale so much as he acted the way he did because he had this big romantic fantasy as his Wife’s Husband and Dorothy was part of that, so eventually she’d realize for herself that Yale is stupid and love conquers all.

                Then later he lies about why he didn’t want to sleep with Billie by saying “I didn’t want to take advantage of her!” like that’s just the default state (his actual reasoning was sensible of course, it’s that he used that specific lie) and then later when Dorothy came to ask about borrowing his shoes for Walky, Danny made it this weird test where Dorothy had to choose between the shoes or interviewing him about Amazi-Girl and he all but states he did it because he wanted to prove Dorothy would give up Walky for her ambitions.

                Then he starts dating Amazi-Girl, and while we now recognize Amber and AG as plural at the time of writing she really was Amber in a mask, or a fantasy she created to cope with life, and Danny was all in on that until he finally realized Amber was genuinely suffering and it wasn’t just fun kinky superhero girlfriend time.

                “White knight”, in that someone is trying to be extra special nice to girls so they’ll sleep with him, is the wrong term, but I meant it more that Danny in the first four-ish years of the comic exhibited a lot of self-absorbed and delusional thought processes regarding how he processed romantic relationships. He’d throw himself into them assuming it’d all work out and that any problem will be overcome as long as his fantasy narrative continues. Danny’s long since overcome this behaviour, the final punctuation is, I think, in how he and Ethan had a fight at the hospital where Danny would normally submit and instead he stood up for himself.

                Which then gets me to Sal.

                Danny from day one has approached Sal without any kind of expectation the way he did with Amber and probably Ethan too once he figured what that was about. He is uninterested in dating her, ergo by the time he was freed up for that he had already established a friendship with her based on mutually hanging out and being real at a pace they both appreciated, since neither of them really had that with someone else. Danny never came at her thinking about what they were supposed to be, and that’s what Sal needed in someone other than Marcie.

                Tying this all up, and I went into a longer and more rambling take on this a while ago, but my initial perception of Danny and Sal hypothetically getting together was “Danny outgrew being a Nice Guy and now gets a girlfriend”, and I came to realize that thought process came from wanting to avoid the Nice Guy narrative so hard I was trying to say that a guy who used to kind of have those same thoughts growing up and becoming a better and more mature person and then dating someone after that character development was “rewarding him for not being a Nice Guy anymore”, and I’ve realized that was really stupid because I’m basically saying that Danny isn’t allowed to date girls anymore because otherwise that’s “a Nice Guy narrative.”

                This is why I am not a professional writer, because I think dumb things.

                • Sirksome
                  Sirksome
                  September 6, 2021 at 12:45 pm | #

                  I agree with this for the most part. Especially concerning Danny’s relationship with Dorothy which was probably him at his worst. Makes sense for the start of the comic since he hadn’t developed at all.

                  But I do have to say that shoe thing was totally unfair to him. Dorothy was asking for too much from her ex just because they were still technically friends. She chose to end that relationship and it’s hugely selfish to then expect favors from him to solve problems she created and advance her ambitions. Danny’s nice but there is such a thing as being too nice and helping her there was. Walky should have had two pairs of shoes.

                  Also for a long time Danny wasn’t aware AG and Amber were the same person and even when he found out neither of them were fully aware of the disassociation aspect and frankly Amber just kind of made the rules up as she went along and expected Danny to get it instead of explaining it *Not that she really could*

              • Spencer
                Spencer
                September 6, 2021 at 11:37 am | #

                Oh gosh I did not think that would be that rambling

                • milu
                  milu
                  September 6, 2021 at 2:23 pm | #

                  hey it’s cool, i love it that people here take this story so seriously and i appreciate the effort you went to. i admit i don’t remember a lot of the early stories, so i only have vague memories of those events you describe, so, no notes.

                  one extra thought i’ve had in the meantime (while buying groceries) is that under this framing, Danny must be getting “more” out of dating Sal than she out of dating him. social capital, sure, but beyond that (pretty hollow) value, it’s not at all clear who in this story is a catch for whom. Danny’s a pretty awesome person, i think. at least from what we’ve seen of him lately.

                  anyway, i hadn’t realized you were shaking your head at your past self, your original post makes more sense now lol ^^

                  also also you’re a bit hard on yourself, being a thoughtful and insightful reader (which you are) who sometimes gets something wrong (and readily admits it) doesn’t make you a bad writer? i don’t know that you are a writer, mind. well, aside from all the thoughtful and insightful comments

          • milu
            milu
            September 6, 2021 at 10:21 am | #

            that being said, i do agree that this comic fails to improve the overall media landscape wrt opposite-gender friendships!

            i have spoken.

          • Clif
            Clif
            September 6, 2021 at 11:26 am | #

            Where Sal is concerned, I feel that it is far too early to rule out the possibility of drama.

      • Proto
        Proto
        September 6, 2021 at 1:38 pm | #

        We’ve gotten that with Ethan but he hasn’t been around in a while.

  5. Jenn
    Jenn
    September 6, 2021 at 12:06 am | #

    Yeeeep that sounds like Danny

    • Leorale
      Leorale
      September 6, 2021 at 12:36 am | #

      He’s doing so much better at realizing what’s going on, though!
      It’s a Hat of +3 Perception

      • AGV
        AGV
        September 6, 2021 at 4:22 am | #

        Sal actually checks the gear’s stats beforehand
        Not like she’d admit it if asked

    • David
      David
      September 6, 2021 at 12:54 am | #

      To be fair, that was freshman moi as well. Just less self-awareness.

    • Jay
      Jay
      September 6, 2021 at 11:45 am | #

      Honestly, he’s more perceptive and aware than I expected. Kudos.

  6. Kyrik Michalowski
    Kyrik Michalowski
    September 6, 2021 at 12:06 am | #

    It’ll be ok Danny. Sal doesn’t bite you know…

    I mean, she could if you asked her to.

    • Tawnee
      Tawnee
      September 6, 2021 at 12:13 am | #

      Bitey Sal? Yotomoe, you know what to do.

      • Kyrik Michalowski
        Kyrik Michalowski
        September 6, 2021 at 2:02 am | #

        As someone who finds Sal very hot, I would be ecstatic if Yotomoe did more sexy Sal pieces.

  7. Citizen Octopus
    Citizen Octopus
    September 6, 2021 at 12:06 am | #

    Danny Logic is sound logic.

    • Citizen Octopus
      Citizen Octopus
      September 6, 2021 at 12:08 am | #

      Also, panel 4 Danny is cutest Danny ever to grace this comic.

    • David
      David
      September 6, 2021 at 12:55 am | #

      Ah Danny, the normal college freshman character.

  8. Opus the Poet
    Opus the Poet
    September 6, 2021 at 12:07 am | #

    Joe needs to learn that opposite-gender relationships can be non-sexual.

    • Opus the Poet
      Opus the Poet
      September 6, 2021 at 12:08 am | #

      And that people can be into other people and it not be about having sex.

    • Nono
      Nono
      September 6, 2021 at 12:10 am | #

      And yet half this comment section is furiously shipping Joe and Joyce.

      • Spencer
        Spencer
        September 6, 2021 at 1:07 am | #

        I’m working on the other half.

        They too will see the light.

      • Reltzik
        Reltzik
        September 6, 2021 at 8:36 am | #

        The difference is that most of those commenters do realize that opposite gender relationships can be non-sexual… they just don’t WANT it to be in that case.

        (Actually I’m guessing most of the JoJo shippers would be more interested in the romance and relationship than the sex, but that’s how it ties into this thread, so.)

        • zee
          zee
          September 6, 2021 at 1:31 pm | #

          I mean the sex would be interesting too, with Joyce’s hangups and all. Wonder if she’ll ever let slip that she watched his sex tape

          • Miri
            Miri
            September 6, 2021 at 3:36 pm | #

            Also, learnt that sex isn’t the boy rubbing his thingy against the girl’s belly button from his sex tape…

    • Dean
      Dean
      September 6, 2021 at 12:18 am | #

      Not this one, though.

    • Scoops!
      Scoops!
      September 6, 2021 at 12:31 am | #

      Sure, but when Danny’s story ends with “… and then she kissed me.” I don’t blame Joe for running with that. My apologies to anyone who wants to do more platonic kissing.

      • Reltzik
        Reltzik
        September 6, 2021 at 4:24 am | #

        I think platonic kissing just got thrown under la bise.

        • Clif
          Clif
          September 6, 2021 at 11:29 am | #

          Take two Internets. You probably earned them.

          • milu
            milu
            September 6, 2021 at 2:36 pm | #

            i think Reltzik has an silly amount of internets by now, we should switch to giving them cake emojis or something

            • Reltzik
              Reltzik
              September 6, 2021 at 5:38 pm | #

              Nooo! I still need 12,000 more internets to complete my beowulf cluster of internets!

              …. I was going to call it the interinternet.

              • milu
                milu
                September 6, 2021 at 7:53 pm | #

                🍰

    • Keulen
      Keulen
      September 6, 2021 at 6:44 am | #

      They definitely can be. Though Sal is also definitely into Danny, and I’m pretty sure Joyce and Joe would both make a good couple.

  9. EpochFlame
    EpochFlame
    September 6, 2021 at 12:07 am | #

    danny is going to have a good day

  10. RassilonTDavros
    RassilonTDavros
    September 6, 2021 at 12:07 am | #

    I feel like Panel 4 is calling out people who get on other peoples’ asses about their ships

    • Mr D
      Mr D
      September 6, 2021 at 8:34 am | #

      I am so angry about people turning everything into ships. Characters share a single conversation and the fans go “OH THEY FAWKING”

    • Regalli
      Regalli
      September 6, 2021 at 9:56 am | #

      I really wish multishipping and the understanding of ‘I don’t expect or even necessarily want this to be canon, but I like playing with this dynamic’ were more common. Sometimes there’s a relationship you don’t think would actually work, but has one particular aspect that’s really fun to think about and work with. Sometimes the relationship is clearly a trainwreck, but is a really compelling trainwreck that’s fun to explore. Sometimes you just think it’d be hot and/or funny to pair these two characters up.

      (For an example of the first: Sal/Carla obviously isn’t gonna work. Sal is too straight, and Sal seems to want sex in her romantic relationships where Carla’s a sex-repulsed ace. Totally incompatible orientations. At the same time, while ‘what would Linda think’ shouldn’t be the only factor in a Sal or Walky ship, there’s something I really enjoy about Sal introducing her girlfriend to the parents and them having to deal with all the unexamined biases and the fact that Carla’s every bit as rebellious and uninterested in what authority figures think of her as Sal, but is also a tech heiress whose social clout FAR eclipses the Walkertons. I enjoy Sal and Carla’s dynamic in general, but that particular aspect is what I’d write a fic about because Carla would DESTROY Linda.)

      • milu
        milu
        September 6, 2021 at 10:30 am | #

        ooh, please write it =)

        • Regalli
          Regalli
          September 6, 2021 at 6:56 pm | #

          I don’t write nearly fast enough to commit to anything, but with my longstanding interest in this series it seems more likely than not to happen EVENTUALLY.

          • milu
            milu
            September 6, 2021 at 7:57 pm | #

            =D
            Hypothetically, this would happen on ao3?

            • Regalli
              Regalli
              September 6, 2021 at 8:35 pm | #

              If a fic ever happens, the comments section will know.

      • BBCC
        BBCC
        September 6, 2021 at 2:19 pm | #

        Exactly. Not every ship is ‘I want it to be canon’. Sometimes it’s just ‘ahahahaha, no, not for canon, but for hypotheticals sake, what could happen?’

    • milu
      milu
      September 6, 2021 at 10:25 am | #

      if so, i feel like the complaint is somewhat weakened by Joe instantly calling BS and Danny agreeing.

  11. BBCC
    BBCC
    September 6, 2021 at 12:07 am | #

    GET OVER IT AND GET OUT THERE OR SO HELP ME I’LL BREAK THROUGH THE FOURTH WALL AND THROW YOU OUT YOUR WINDOW MYSELF.

    • Doctor_Who
      Doctor_Who
      September 6, 2021 at 12:10 am | #

      The Salvatar* makes this better.

      *(didn’t he fight the Flash)?

      • powerpowerpow
        powerpowerpow
        September 6, 2021 at 12:30 am | #

        I thought he was the guy who painted those melty clocks

    • Joe_prolly
      Joe_prolly
      September 6, 2021 at 12:11 am | #

      “I’ve never had reason to say this Danny but LET ME LIVE VICARIOUSLY THROUGH YOU! DO IT FOR ME!”

  12. Brumagem
    Brumagem
    September 6, 2021 at 12:07 am | #

    Frightened into denial is a lot more believable than being THAT oblivious.

    For a minute there I was going to punch a hole through my screen.

    • Spencer
      Spencer
      September 6, 2021 at 1:33 am | #

      Well yeah he’s not oblivious now, Sal made a move.

      Sal kissing him on the cheek suddenly made him realize he was talking to the absurdly hot motorcycle girl who used to beat people up on the reg with Amazi-Girl.

      • thejeff
        thejeff
        September 6, 2021 at 10:52 am | #

        Maybe. Or maybe he’s been at least partly aware for awhile, but too frightened into denial to address it. He wasn’t showing it right after the kiss, so not showing it before doesn’t mean he was oblivious then.

  13. Beau Kirin Maysey
    Beau Kirin Maysey
    September 6, 2021 at 12:11 am | #

    Listen, Joe, I might believe in everything I’m saying but that doesn’t mean i can’t also utilize it as a

    COPING MECHANISM

  14. Prince Mech
    Prince Mech
    September 6, 2021 at 12:14 am | #

    Oh Danny, you precious little idiot. Good luck kiddo.

  15. Qube
    Qube
    September 6, 2021 at 12:14 am | #

    has danny gained… self-awareness?

    FUCK’S SAKE EVERYBODY PANIC

    • Doctor_Who
      Doctor_Who
      September 6, 2021 at 12:23 am | #

      Sal bought him a hat than grants +2 Wisdom.

      • Nayann Martinelli
        Nayann Martinelli
        September 6, 2021 at 1:20 am | #

        He can finally roll an Insight check with a +0 bonus!

  16. newlland(Henryvolt)
    newlland(Henryvolt)
    September 6, 2021 at 12:20 am | #

    There it is, There it is he’s blowing it already. For fuck sakes Danny this better be the one where you don’t Dan it all up again

    • Spencer
      Spencer
      September 6, 2021 at 12:28 am | #

      It’s a pretty good gig tbh

      Sal’s afraid of affectionate gestures that turn out to be fronts for manipulation, except Danny’s in full Deer in Headlights mode and can’t really make any kind of gesture so all she has to do is sufficiently bully him to get used to the whole “being open and affectionate around someone” thing.

      • newlland(Henryvolt)
        newlland(Henryvolt)
        September 6, 2021 at 12:34 am | #

        Well Danny loves getting dominated after all: http://www.itswalky.com/comic/bossy/

  17. Regalli
    Regalli
    September 6, 2021 at 12:22 am | #

    Those last two panels are just delightful on every level.

    • Regalli
      Regalli
      September 6, 2021 at 12:41 am | #

      And then I went to Willis’s Twitter to see if we were finally free of the Screaming Jesus Bondage Face 9CL thread and the ‘gay people just haven’t met the right Straight Love Interest yet!’ storyline that has been running the last THREE MONTHS, happy Pride. (Yes, bisexuals exist. No, that word has not been uttered, or any sentiment like it, at any point in the last three months. Go see the thread for yourself if you think it deserves the benefit of the doubt.)

      We are not.

      Still, those last two panels soothe me.

      • Thag Simmons
        Thag Simmons
        September 6, 2021 at 6:29 am | #

        i want to get off mr. legs’s wild ride

      • Needfuldoer
        Needfuldoer
        September 6, 2021 at 8:17 am | #

        I’m not on Twitter, and I don’t read LEGSLEGSLEGSLOVECRAFTIANMOUTHLEGS the comic, but I salute Willis for his sacrifice in keeping up on it for us.

        o7

        • Regalli
          Regalli
          September 6, 2021 at 8:58 am | #

          Indeed. Truly, the filter of Willis Dismay is what keeps the all-consuming terror from taking hold in us all.

          • milu
            milu
            September 6, 2021 at 10:42 am | #

            me, a person not in the US who has no idea how many people actually read this ridiculous comic: it’s a pretty funny thread tho

            • Regalli
              Regalli
              September 6, 2021 at 12:50 pm | #

              Oh, it’s a great thread and newspaper comics are dying. I’m just dismayed by the strip itself.

              • milu
                milu
                September 6, 2021 at 2:29 pm | #

                yep. yep yep yep

            • Thag Simmons
              Thag Simmons
              September 6, 2021 at 2:41 pm | #

              I can’t imagine it has a large readership, because despite everything my brain still believes in a just and sensible world

  18. powerpowerpow
    powerpowerpow
    September 6, 2021 at 12:26 am | #

    I haven’t related more to Danny than I do in this moment.

    • Jimmy
      Jimmy
      September 6, 2021 at 11:44 am | #

      Same here, though this moment is exceedingly rare in my experiences. Wishing him and Sal nothing but the best though!

  19. Svata
    Svata
    September 6, 2021 at 12:32 am | #

    If that ain’t a mood from Danny I don’t know what is

  20. newlland(Henryvolt)
    newlland(Henryvolt)
    September 6, 2021 at 12:32 am | #

    Is there a trope name for willful ignorance towards a intense love interest so we can use this strip as a page image on TV tropes. Right now Danny is reminding me of Fred from the mystery interview incorporated version of Scooby-Doo or that resident evil chrisposting meme version of Chris Redfield always friend zoning all his romantic interests.

    • StClair
      StClair
      September 6, 2021 at 12:37 am | #

      He’s not actually oblivious, though. He’s just terrified of the implications and consequences.

      • Spencer
        Spencer
        September 6, 2021 at 12:42 am | #

        I think he means that Danny knows Sal is interested but he himself is too shy and panicked to say how he himself feels.

        • Jamie
          Jamie
          September 6, 2021 at 2:11 am | #

          Buying her a bicycle was… a lot, though?

          • Spencer
            Spencer
            September 6, 2021 at 7:47 am | #

            Yeah but the whole point of Danny and Sal’s interactions last chapter was that Danny actually was completely as straightforward and honest as he appeared, and his stated intent was in making her feel better. By the end Sal understood that his persistent kindness towards her wasn’t a front for emotional blackmail and that Sal attempting to reject that kindness by making it into a transaction or just flat out refusing the flowers wasn’t going to make Danny turn on her.

            I definitely think he could have had a crush on her while doing so, but their little storyline last chapter was really clear that Danny’s current actions were entirely motivated by his stated intent to make her happy since he had noticed she was upset without her bike.

            • Regalli
              Regalli
              September 6, 2021 at 9:32 am | #

              My read on Danny’s actions there was 1) Crush definitely EXISTS and was a partial motive (between the bike and the immediate follow-up flowers, there was A Lot, and Danny usually reserves these Big Dramatic Gestures that tend to be overwhelming for people he likes romantically,) but 2) The gifts were sort of a ‘hey, I’m interested in you, but if you’re not, no big deal, and you can take the gifts without me reading it as romantic if you’d like’ gesture. Putting his interest out there, but not expecting anything in return.

              Which is growth from how he handled the big dramatic gesture with Dorothy, while still giving room for tension in this relationship as it potentially turns romantic because Sal’s trauma and defense mechanisms aren’t going away just because it’s Danny. He’s going to have to stay conscious of how his romcom tendencies can come off as too big not to have a catch (and make sure he DOESN’T unconsciously have a catch there,) she’s going to have to choose to trust him that they don’t. Plus the inevitable Linda Issue. But they can also have their very sweet dynamic together that they’ve had hanging out platonically, because that doesn’t have to change even if they’re banging.

              • Spencer
                Spencer
                September 6, 2021 at 12:00 pm | #

                I dunno, I’m not sure I read it that way myself.

                I think Danny’s actions last chapter and Danny having a crush on Sal are two things, because I really think the point of last chapter was that Danny was completely sincere and honest with zero hidden intention. If he was into her but treated it as “I’m just being nice!” then that’s a level of dishonesty that I think cuts into Sal’s trust in him. Not that it’s wrong for Danny to have a crush on her and also want to do right by her as a friend, but that I think Sal herself would perceive it as emotional manipulation.

                Which is to say that while Danny could definitely have had a crush on her and that motivated him to do what he did, I don’t think there was any expectation out of it, since romantic expectations were a defining feature of him for the last decade. “Putting it out there”, I think, is something if Danny wanted to do at that point, he would have said so.

                • Regalli
                  Regalli
                  September 6, 2021 at 12:49 pm | #

                  Admittedly, hard to say unless it comes up. The way they’d been talking about the flowers before he bought them suggests to me the romantic element was something on his mind and that Sal picked up on (because flowers, being a traditionally romantic gesture,) but I could see the bike being genuinely a friend thing (or at least, intended as a friend thing but he does have a crush.)

                  That said, I also WANT a degree of character drama where they haven’t worked through all their insecurities before entering a romantic relationship, because there’s plenty of genuinely interesting storylines from trying to navigate a relationship when trauma’s in the way. (And not nearly enough stories about ‘lasting trauma does not go away because love, but that doesn’t mean you can’t have a functional relationship even with the trauma causing problems.’) Sal’s still going to be insecure about if her partner’s manipulating her no matter what, because Linda, so I’d see ‘recognizing Danny had potential romantic intent but still totally accepted a no’ as a better sign than ‘Danny had no romantic intent whatsoever’ there. (And either way, Danny’s still making big enough moves that he’s going to have to be careful because Sal will still have that issue. Danny’s romcom thing is also one of those characterization pieces I expect he’ll have to keep in check longterm, just in general, because it’s become a problem with EVERY romantic relationship he’s floated, including Ethan just pre-timeskip. He was too caught up in the ‘I’m gonna confess’ to keep in mind ‘Ethan is REALLY traumatized by this and does deeply care about/is maybe in love with his and Amber’s shitty friend, I should tread carefully there even if I don’t like Mike.’)

      • newlland(Henryvolt)
        newlland(Henryvolt)
        September 6, 2021 at 1:13 am | #

        I always thought “willful ignorance” was just a saying for people in such deep denial that they just convince themselves of not knowing to the point where they seem oblivious.

    • Spencer
      Spencer
      September 6, 2021 at 12:46 am | #

      Oh yeah, not trying to jump down your throat saying this since I know exactly what you’re actually saying, but “friend zone” is a pretty loaded term given its origins as essentially a way for dudes to whine that girls don’t like them back for being So Nice.

      I reiterate that I know you mean it as simply as “Person A likes Person B, but Person B doesn’t like them back”, I just wanted to point this out since using it casually can get conflated with its roots.

  21. Sirksome
    Sirksome
    September 6, 2021 at 12:41 am | #

    You know I just thought about how happy Linda would be at the thought of Sal dating a white boy and I kind of hate how quickly I thought of that but also now it kind of ruins Sal x Danny just a little bit.

    • Spencer
      Spencer
      September 6, 2021 at 12:43 am | #

      Yyyyyeeeeepppp.

      If this gets serious I think a lot of the drama’s gonna be based in how other people treat Sal for opening up to the dorky ukelele guy, and how that betrays the image everyone just decided she had to follow.

      Sal dating someone her parents approve of is the main course.

    • DailyBrad
      DailyBrad
      September 6, 2021 at 1:41 am | #

      Yeah, though she’s also probably going to be shitty to him because I get the impression the Walkertons are considerably better off than the Wilcoxes.

      • AGV
        AGV
        September 6, 2021 at 4:27 am | #

        Or as soon as she finds out that he’s bi

        • Varangian
          Varangian
          September 6, 2021 at 6:07 am | #

          Y…you mean Linda, right? The idea of Sal being shitty to Danny because he’s bi is wildly out of character, but Linda…I mean, I think she’d probably couch it in passive-aggressive faux acceptance, rather than outright homophobia, but yeah.

      • Needfuldoer
        Needfuldoer
        September 6, 2021 at 8:23 am | #

        Linda looks down on the Wilcoxes for not being as well off as she is.

        The Wilcoxes berate Danny for getting involved with “people like them”.

        Linda takes offense and starts arguing with them.

        The argument escalates into one of those cartoon fight dust clouds.

        Charles, on the sidelines, almost hints that he might congratulate Sal and Danny, but at just the right moment Linda pops out of the dust cloud, grabs him by the wrist, and drags him in.

        • Miri
          Miri
          September 6, 2021 at 4:04 pm | #

          I think Linda can think of plenty of reasons to disapprove of Danny:

          1. Unmotivated. He was totally planning on being First Husband and had no personal ambitions beyond “keep Dorothy” at the start of the school year; he’s been finding himself a bit more but I don’t think Linda will see any of that.
          2. She’ll either believe that being bi means he’s closeted gay, or super-promiscuous. Or both. I could see her telling Sal not to come crying to her when he gives her AIDS in the heat of an argument (despite things like Prep, and monogamy, and that juat being an utterly vile thing to think, let alone say).
          3. The ukelele. Either Sal is going for a wannabe musician? He’s probably a drug-addled loser. Or Sal is going out with somebody with such poor taste he thinks the ukelele is a good instrument to take up playing? Well, he likes Sal so of course he’s a moron with no sense of taste.
          4. No backbone. Despite Charles being cardboard, I can see her despising Danny for being a pushover. (I kinda suspect she despises Charles and he in part doesn’t stick up for Sal because time Linda spends berating her is time she isn’t spending berating him…)
          5. When they break up, Walky will need to date Sal, and he’s Linda’s precious golden child and she wants better for him His friends: Joe is Amber’s stepbrother, and Amber is facing a court case for assault and her father kidnapped Walky. Clearly Danny hangs out with dangerous individuals.

          Nothing Sal does will ever be good enough for Linda. If she dated Jason, he’d be too Black. Although she’d probably say that given the time he spends building his muscles, his going into Law is probably to get him out of the trouble he’ll get himself into being a general thug. Think of a person, she will find something wrong with them. If nothing else if they want to have a serious relationship with Sal she will believe their judgement is seriously flawed.

          She’s a horrible person.

          • Needfuldoer
            Needfuldoer
            September 6, 2021 at 4:37 pm | #

            I know you mean Jacob, but Linda probably wouldn’t approve of Jason either.

            Nothing Sal does will ever be good enough for Linda. Sal is the scapegoat in her narcissistic world.

            • Regalli
              Regalli
              September 6, 2021 at 7:02 pm | #

              The only way I’d find Linda approving of Sal’s boyfriend remotely plausible is if it becomes a horrible racist interplay while also meeting Lucy. Even then, I wouldn’t bet one way or the other.

            • Miri
              Miri
              September 7, 2021 at 2:47 am | #

              😂🤦🏻‍♀️ Of course I did! I am not great with names…

    • Andy
      Andy
      September 6, 2021 at 1:55 am | #

      What’s worse is that when Sal realizes her mom approves, it’ll probably ruin it in-universe, too.

    • Thag Simmons
      Thag Simmons
      September 6, 2021 at 6:30 am | #

      Imagine how bad Sal/Tony would go here

  22. Illjwamh
    Illjwamh
    September 6, 2021 at 12:45 am | #

    I feel you, Danny.

    • Nayann Martinelli
      Nayann Martinelli
      September 6, 2021 at 1:17 am | #

      Ditto

  23. brionl
    brionl
    September 6, 2021 at 12:50 am | #

    Maybe he really is dead after all.

  24. MrSmith
    MrSmith
    September 6, 2021 at 12:56 am | #

    Joe speaks for all of us and sometimes thats how you have to speak to someone, especially Danny

  25. David
    David
    September 6, 2021 at 12:56 am | #

    Oh hai 18-year-old me, I didn’t see you there.

    • Needfuldoer
      Needfuldoer
      September 6, 2021 at 8:24 am | #

      No, that’s 30-mumble year old me…

  26. Kravis
    Kravis
    September 6, 2021 at 1:24 am | #

    Face it, tiger… (Or whatever other animal is “proportional” to you)

    Sal want the D.

    • Kyrik Michalowski
      Kyrik Michalowski
      September 6, 2021 at 1:41 am | #

      The “D” in this case referring to Danny.

      • Kravis
        Kravis
        September 6, 2021 at 12:08 pm | #

        EXACTLY!

        (and I’m missing a “S” in “wants”)

  27. Judas Peckerwood
    Judas Peckerwood
    September 6, 2021 at 1:33 am | #

    Honesty is the best policy. Mostly.

  28. DailyBrad
    DailyBrad
    September 6, 2021 at 1:41 am | #

    This is one of the funniest Danny and Joe interactions in quite some time.

  29. JessWitt
    JessWitt
    September 6, 2021 at 1:44 am | #

    4th to 5th panels: What the flip-oh thank the gods Danny’s not that dumb.

    Also welcome back, Dapper Danny.

    • Alex
      Alex
      September 6, 2021 at 4:39 am | #

      I was about to be very mad at him until I saw the last panel, and now all I can think is “yeah that’s fair”.

  30. Bagge
    Bagge
    September 6, 2021 at 2:38 am | #

    So between Danny dannying it up and Joe trying his best to Joe it up to avoid feels and Sal being too chicken for doors… I think this is the beginning of a very Danny relationship

  31. Proto
    Proto
    September 6, 2021 at 2:59 am | #

    Alright I will accept the hat as part of your new look or whatever, Danny, but Jesus, if you aren’t going to a formal event why are you putting on a damn necktie?

    • Kyrik Michalowski
      Kyrik Michalowski
      September 6, 2021 at 3:10 am | #

      Is Danny not allowed to wear a necktie just because he wants to?

      • Proto
        Proto
        September 6, 2021 at 1:35 pm | #

        I mean, he’s allowed to wear whatever he wants the same way I’m technically allowed to wear a tuxedo to the gym but that doesn’t stop it from being a bizarre fashion choice for a young man who is (presumably) just going to class today and not a job or anything that requires a tie.

    • Disastroid
      Disastroid
      September 6, 2021 at 9:48 am | #

      In the back of his mind, he’s just being ready for his own funeral?

    • milu
      milu
      September 6, 2021 at 11:07 am | #

      maybe he has some sort of fantasy in mind where Sal grabs him by the tie to kiss him?

      maybe Willis has that sort of fantasy in mind?

    • zee
      zee
      September 6, 2021 at 1:45 pm | #

      It’s fashion bro

  32. BenRG
    BenRG
    September 6, 2021 at 3:14 am | #

    This is genuinely sweet; we all occasionally meet someone and the biggest barrier to doing anything is knowing that they are totally out of your league (at least in our own minds)!

  33. Sombrero
    Sombrero
    September 6, 2021 at 3:39 am | #

    From now on, Sal’s description in the Cast page should be just “Walky’s absurdly hot twin sister”.

    • BenRG
      BenRG
      September 6, 2021 at 5:02 am | #

      “… who likes musical hat-wearing geeks.”

    • milu
      milu
      September 6, 2021 at 11:09 am | #

      …or not? i find it kind of demeaning

      • khn0
        khn0
        September 6, 2021 at 5:32 pm | #

        Walky’s description should be “Sal’s absurdly hot twin brother” as a result.
        Because, you know, circular definitions are a thing that I find hilarious.
        I may be the only one, tho.

        • Michael L
          Michael L
          September 6, 2021 at 6:06 pm | #

          That’s not particularly circular. It reduces them both to their physical appearance, but those descriptions are accurate and not confusing.

          • khn0
            khn0
            September 7, 2021 at 7:48 am | #

            it’s circular because in order to have one defined, you must know the other, which is defined by the first

  34. Rabisch
    Rabisch
    September 6, 2021 at 3:59 am | #

    I can’t stop thinking that Danny’s new hat fits him much better than his old one. It’s really a part of a great style now! Joe’s reaction is pretty adorable and he’s finally able to point out how Danny knows what’s going on and is afraid of it. I just hope this will lead Joe to be a great wingman for Danny and not a source of terrible advice.

    • Alex
      Alex
      September 6, 2021 at 6:00 am | #

      Why not both?

      • Rabisch
        Rabisch
        September 6, 2021 at 10:53 am | #

        A great wingman that gives a lot of terrible advice? Like suggesting an absurd courtship dance? Interesting…

        • a/snow/mous/e
          a/snow/mous/e
          September 6, 2021 at 11:47 pm | #

          a wingman whose advice is really for the birds?

  35. Varangian
    Varangian
    September 6, 2021 at 6:09 am | #

    Danny, you must fulfill your destiny. Go be Sal’s new motorcycle.

    • Proto
      Proto
      September 6, 2021 at 1:36 pm | #

      *eyebrows waggle*

  36. Keulen
    Keulen
    September 6, 2021 at 6:54 am | #

    I’m glad Danny isn’t that oblivious and he’s figured out that Sal is into him. For me, I’d like to hope a girl giving me a gift and kissing me would be enough for me to realize she’s into me, but I feel like there’s a very good chance I’d still not figure it out I’d assume she’s just being friendly or something.

    • Reltzik
      Reltzik
      September 6, 2021 at 8:16 am | #

      Danny is clearing the “must jump this high to not be oblivious” bar recently established by Walky.

      This feels like this shouldn’t be an accomplishment, but for Danny, I think it’s an accomplishment.

    • thejeff
      thejeff
      September 6, 2021 at 10:57 am | #

      I suspect he’s been aware for awhile but the “frightened out of my mind” part was keeping him from openly acknowledging it.

  37. T Campbell
    T Campbell
    September 6, 2021 at 7:32 am | #

    An inferior version of this strip would’ve had Joe say “Nooo, this can’t happen, I’M the one the hotties go for,” and cue existential crisis. But Joe’s never been like that. Maybe he treats sexual interactions as a game, but at least the game is not a zero-sum one.

  38. Delicious Taffy
    Delicious Taffy
    September 6, 2021 at 7:43 am | #

    Oh good, he does know.

  39. Thomas O.
    Thomas O.
    September 6, 2021 at 9:25 am | #

    I read panel 3 in South Park Kyle’s Mom’s voice. 😀

  40. Xccj
    Xccj
    September 6, 2021 at 10:01 am | #

    Should I be concerned that Danny’s outfit of vest, tie, and hat is something I would wear?

    • Jammy
      Jammy
      September 6, 2021 at 10:23 pm | #

      I think they’re mostly fine choices, just a lot to wear all at once.
      That said, nobody really wants to wear a tie and they’re disease sponges that don’t get laundered enough. They always come off a try-hard affectation or an obligation for a job in my eyes.

      • Roborat
        Roborat
        September 7, 2021 at 3:56 pm | #

        I absolutely hate ties, they have no actual purpose as clothing, and I would be very happy if they fell out of fashion. The only time I wear them is when I have to, such as part of my uniform (military), or at a formal event.

  41. thumb
    thumb
    September 6, 2021 at 12:17 pm | #

    True, but then, more true.

    • milu
      milu
      September 6, 2021 at 2:50 pm | #

      pithy.

  42. zee
    zee
    September 6, 2021 at 1:46 pm | #

    Heh, this reminds me a lot of my boyfriend right before we started dating. I love these two so hard

  43. ADLegend21
    ADLegend21
    September 7, 2021 at 2:36 pm | #

    Danny is the embodiment of “well mark me down as scared AND aroused” lmaoooo

    • Roborat
      Roborat
      September 7, 2021 at 3:53 pm | #

      Isn’t scaroused an actual thing?

  44. LovelyMonsters
    LovelyMonsters
    September 9, 2021 at 3:36 am | #

    Ah, so he would have made his move and not even pretended this was a friendship if the girl in question was uglier? Wow. Tight race these days between Danny and Walky for who’s the most misogynist piece of shit in the strip.

    Men become “better people” by parasitizing women’s lives and minds.

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