Dumbing of Age Book Twelve

Dumbing of Age

A college webcomic by David Willis
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May 12, 2026

Coolsville

by David M Willis on February 19, 2023 at 12:01 am
  • 03 – Joementum
└ Tags: joyce, sarah

Discussion (156) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. shadowcell
    shadowcell
    February 19, 2023 at 12:03 am | #

    Dumbing of Age Book 13: No One Says “Coolsville”!

    • Yumi
      Yumi
      February 19, 2023 at 12:06 am | #

      Dumbing of Age Book 13: You’ve Finally Masturbated, Haven’t You.

      • Ana Chronistic
        Ana Chronistic
        February 19, 2023 at 12:21 am | #

        Sarah’s calibrating her sensors

        (inb4: at midnight we were in the express lanes where an accident had blocked all lanes and for some reason ONLY DoA wouldn’t load on my phone)

      • ValdVin
        ValdVin
        February 19, 2023 at 6:55 am | #

        “There’s nobtruth to the rumor that I call my dominant hand Other Other Jacob. “

      • Lysbeth
        Lysbeth
        February 19, 2023 at 8:46 am | #

        Dumbing of Age Book 13: No WAY, Daddy-O!

  2. Doctor_Who
    Doctor_Who
    February 19, 2023 at 12:03 am | #

    Masturbation turned Joyce into a beatnik!

    …There’s probably a Chick Tract warning about exactly that.

    • Wack'd
      Wack'd
      February 19, 2023 at 12:08 am | #

      She’s finally become a hippie or a drifter, or maybe a hifter or a drippie.

      • Stephen Bierce
        Stephen Bierce
        February 19, 2023 at 12:10 am | #

        “To find water, follow a drip.”–Hawkeye on M*A*S*H

      • Rose by Any Other Name
        Rose by Any Other Name
        February 19, 2023 at 12:54 am | #

        Hifter made me think Grifter, and I just imagined Joyce grifting people into believing that she did not in fact masturbate.

        • Taffy
          Taffy
          February 19, 2023 at 2:14 am | #

          See, “Grifter” just made me think about Joyce in a red bandana mask and combat boots, holding two pistols.

          • Council
            Council
            February 19, 2023 at 2:41 am | #

            Time out. Taffy, you are missing out on that amazing Joyce face on panel 3

            Surely you are shocked enough by this blunder that you will take the amazing Joyce face on panel 5

            • Taffy
              Taffy
              February 19, 2023 at 10:17 am | #

              No? I definitely saw them. What?

              • milu
                milu
                February 19, 2023 at 5:27 pm | #

                you’ve been wearing the same avatar for days! is i think what the person meant.

        • zee
          zee
          February 19, 2023 at 12:18 pm | #

          I mean that’s basically those nofap gurus isn’t it?

      • Furie
        Furie
        February 19, 2023 at 5:44 am | #

        Considering what she did, drippie might be a little on the nose.

        • Opus the Poet
          Opus the Poet
          February 19, 2023 at 8:11 pm | #

          Take my imaginary upvote.

  3. DarkoNeko
    DarkoNeko
    February 19, 2023 at 12:04 am | #

    . . . That’s your first assumption ?

    rather than, like “you finally aren’t suffering atrociously from menstrual cramps anymore ?”

    • James
      James
      February 19, 2023 at 12:12 am | #

      Sarah has known not-suffering-cramps Joyce, this is a distinct and worryingly new flavor of relaxed.

    • TerribleTransit
      TerribleTransit
      February 19, 2023 at 12:22 am | #

      She was already aware of Joyce very conspicuously and enthusiastically “doing laundry” the previous day. It’s not hard to put two and two together.

    • anon
      anon
      February 19, 2023 at 12:39 am | #

      Well, it’s not like we can hear her tone compared to sarah and being in the room, but i feel like the last strip of saying “oh i have to take these for the rest of my life possibly/until menopause” isn’t exactly positive thinking if not a snarky way of her coping/self deprecating(?) even if she didn’t complain as much after downing the bottle compared to last time

      • zee
        zee
        February 19, 2023 at 12:23 pm | #

        Meh? Not sure how it’s negative. It’s just a neutral fact, when you have a reproductive disorder you DO have to take bc for the rest of your life until menopause, unless there’s some sort of permanent surgical solution (rare) or you get an IUD, which i doubt Joyce ever would.

        Sometimes you have to take medication forever for a chronic condition. Oh well, it’s not a big deal. Especially with something as relatively unintrusive on your life as bc pills. Speaking from experience

        • Opus the Poet
          Opus the Poet
          February 19, 2023 at 8:22 pm | #

          There’s a permanent solution to Joyce’s problem, a hysterectomy with removal of ovaries. But as that makes her permanently sterile (and causes other hormonal problems) and Joyce is just 18 I think other methods will get tried first and surgery will be a last ditch effort to save Joyce’s life. Right now she’s just miserable a few days to a week a month, but if she gets anemic or suicidal, well we would have to see. Source, one of my ex girlfriends had severe menstrual cramps that were not reduced much by BC in her 20s, and had the procedure.

          • S.R.
            S.R.
            February 19, 2023 at 10:50 pm | #

            That actually won’t fix endometriosis, if that’s what she’s dealing with. It helps with cramps (of course), but endometriosis is adhesions outside the uterus.

            • S.R.
              S.R.
              February 19, 2023 at 10:52 pm | #

              And I don’t know why you’d remove the ovaries if the goal is to stop cramps and/or bleeding. Can’t cramp and/or bleed with no uterus.
              (Well. Can’t cramp as much. There are people born without uteruses who get menstrual cramps because, for one reason or another, they have the right hormone balance to trigger it.)

    • Mturtle7
      Mturtle7
      February 19, 2023 at 6:56 pm | #

      To be fair to Sarah, it’s very clear that her FIRST assumption was that Joyce was in love! Masturbation was merely her SECOND assumption.

      • Vukodlak
        Vukodlak
        February 19, 2023 at 8:17 pm | #

        Joyce is especially chill, given her default state is rigid.

  4. DailyBrad
    DailyBrad
    February 19, 2023 at 12:04 am | #

    I figured it’d play out just like this.

    Also, goddamn, Joyce looks cute in that salmon button-down.

    • Thag Simmons
      Thag Simmons
      February 19, 2023 at 12:05 am | #

      This comic consistently has great outfits

      • DailyBrad
        DailyBrad
        February 19, 2023 at 1:32 am | #

        Yeah, Willis does great picking outfits out.

        • milu
          milu
          February 19, 2023 at 5:48 am | #

          Ok so. Everyone is always complimenting Willis about their choice of outfits. Well let me be the first person ever to say, they’re fine but they generally skew bland.

          Like, some of these students should be a bit flamboyant and/or eccentric and/or just gorgeously clueless about fashion yet addicted to Vinted. They’re 20, like how are at least some of them not wildly experimenting with leather pants, asymmetrical sequined crop tops, 90’s nostalgia baggy camo sweatshirts, ugly designer sneakers, attempting to rock a trenchcoat and fedora (and failing, of course failing), embarrassingly unflattering flea-market frames without lenses, whatever k-pop and anime are doing these days fashion-wise, i dont follow, trying for princess, trying for manic pixie dream girl, trying for rugged-but-sexy Lara Croftian gear, trying for “i’m into death and 19th-century opium-eating poets, No i’m not cosplaying as Wednesday Addams why does everyone keep thinking that ugh” (is secretely in love with Wednesday Addams), trying for boyish but hating it when people think you’re a boy, trying for boyish and being thrilled when people think you’re a boy, 1920’s-girl’s-school-teacher-butch, pantsuits!? Where are the pantsuits, pantsuits were everywhere a couple years ago, and of course, we all knew one, absolute deranged neon-coloured eyesore. etc etc for ever in 20 open tabs of pinterest infinite scroll.

          But anyway. The outfits are fine.

          • Fay
            Fay
            February 19, 2023 at 7:19 am | #

            You underestimate the blandness of Indiana. Also these people are college students and don’t have a lot of extra money to spend on clothes, and are also all kind of “normies”. Even then, Carla, Sal, Malaya, and Booster all have somewhat more interesting wardrobes.

            Also, there’s the obvious reason that this is a comic and Willis doesn’t want to have to draw a bunch of super complicated or unique outfits 200 times per storyline.

            • milu
              milu
              February 19, 2023 at 11:01 am | #

              All good points, except for the money argument – you (i guess?) underestimate the lengths to which teenagers will go to look cool, they will pester their parents, learn sewing, borrow clothes from richer friends, shoplift, spend hours in thrift stores, some will even get a summer job!!!

              • elfroyalty
                elfroyalty
                February 19, 2023 at 1:32 pm | #

                i’m ngl i have been to or lived near colleges and college students in a bunch of places before and the only college i have ever seen where i see tons of kids wearing a bunch of out-there fashion is yale, and i think a contributing factor to why there is more diverse fashion in yale is because it’s just more accessible and also generally the student body of yale is a little wealthier, and i think the surrounding area is much more population-dense than at IU.

                i think also aside from saving willis unnecessary labor (could you imagine picking and drawing a new lolita coord every storyline? one BTSSB JSK would kill me instantly, and i love a poofy skirt) a lot of the popular trends of the now would date this comic in a way that willis has expressed not wanting to, especially considering how quickly fashion trends move nowadays thanks to things like tiktok. because of the buffer, by the time a chapter starts running the style a character was wearing would already feel dated, y’know?

          • Needfuldoer
            Needfuldoer
            February 19, 2023 at 11:37 am | #

            My tastes generally skew bland, so…

            ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

          • BBCC
            BBCC
            February 19, 2023 at 12:51 pm | #

            This was definitely not my experience with university fashion. The individual items sure, but not so much not so much the aesthetics. It might depend where you are. And pant suits ARE everywhere but are also, mostly, the domain of the business majors, who had to wear “business clothes”.

            If it helps I’m pretty sure Sal’s worn leather pants before. It’s just that Sal can pull off anything – like when she put on Joyce’s shirt. XD.

            • milu
              milu
              February 19, 2023 at 5:22 pm | #

              ah, not pant suits then. (quick googly google) jumpsuits! i meant jumpsuits.

          • Yumi
            Yumi
            February 19, 2023 at 1:44 pm | #

            Yeah, on the day to day of college fashion in the Midwest, your description is not it, in my experience. There are occasional people who wear clothes that make you go, “That sure is an outfit!” on the regular, but in my experience that’s, like, maybe 1 in 60? So in a large campus, yes, that is ultimately many people, but that doesn’t mean that every group is going to feature many of them.

            From your list, what I have experienced more than in this comic is pretty much “glasses without lenses.” There are also far more graphic t-shirts (that often included pop culture things) and sweatpants.

            Now, when people were going out, sure, there were some shakeups and fun choices. On the day to day, though, I feel like these characters put slightly more into their outfits than what was average in my experience.

          • BOOSTER SHOT
            BOOSTER SHOT
            February 19, 2023 at 3:49 pm | #

            That’s not what college in Indiana in the 2010s was like for me or my sister.

          • milu
            milu
            February 19, 2023 at 5:25 pm | #

            @all: i appreciate your input!

            i guess i 1), didn’t go to college for very long 2) did so in france, not the US 3) apparently have always gravitated towards flashy freaks =)

    • Twig
      Twig
      February 19, 2023 at 10:05 am | #

      Looks more coral to me? But yeah

      • DailyBrad
        DailyBrad
        February 19, 2023 at 10:03 pm | #

        Coral may be a touch more accurate, true. Salmon would maybe be a touch more peach-y looking.

    • Needfuldoer
      Needfuldoer
      February 19, 2023 at 11:36 am | #

      Damn right she does.

  5. Thag Simmons
    Thag Simmons
    February 19, 2023 at 12:04 am | #

    Sarah Holmes and the Enigma of the Laidback Roomie

    • milu
      milu
      February 19, 2023 at 5:03 am | #

      “Deducing that her roomie was acting odd based on the way she acted, Sarah Holmes deduced that her roomie had had a goold old wank, which she had long ago deduced needed to happen asap. The roomie said, “Curse you and your matchless deducing skills, Sarah Holmes! My foolproof plan to not be detected has failed because of you”, the end”

      • Mturtle7
        Mturtle7
        February 19, 2023 at 6:59 pm | #

        Using my own flawless skills of deduction, I must conclude that you, @milu, are secretly Ryan North. https://qwantz.com/index.php?comic=2914

        • milu
          milu
          February 19, 2023 at 7:12 pm | #

          either that or???

  6. Sirksome
    Sirksome
    February 19, 2023 at 12:04 am | #

    The “daddy-o” overplayed her hand.

  7. Yotomoe
    Yotomoe
    February 19, 2023 at 12:05 am | #

    Oh you’re Coolsville? Well I think Coolsville sucks.

    • Doctor_Who
      Doctor_Who
      February 19, 2023 at 12:07 am | #

      You’ve made a powerful enemy of Scoob and the gang.

      • a/snow/mous/e
        a/snow/mous/e
        February 19, 2023 at 3:20 pm | #

        Ruh-roh.

    • AbacusWizard
      AbacusWizard
      February 19, 2023 at 12:53 am | #

      I needed a new heel for my shoe, so I decided to go to Morganville, which is what they called Coolsville in those days.

      • CianM1301
        CianM1301
        February 19, 2023 at 6:55 am | #

        Did you tie an onion to your belt? It was the style at the time, after all.

        • Keulen
          Keulen
          February 19, 2023 at 9:34 am | #

          They didn’t have any white onions because of the war. All you could get was those big yellow ones.

          • 80-watt Hamster
            80-watt Hamster
            February 19, 2023 at 3:57 pm | #

            Eh, the yellow are better anyway.

    • BlackScarabFilmZ
      BlackScarabFilmZ
      February 19, 2023 at 6:46 pm | #

      The power of the press strikes again!

  8. Greg
    Greg
    February 19, 2023 at 12:05 am | #

    Excellent Joyce face and posing in panel 3

  9. AGV
    AGV
    February 19, 2023 at 12:06 am | #

    It took her a hot minute but she did catch up

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      February 19, 2023 at 12:13 am | #

      Oh it was a really hot minute, alright.

      • Needfuldoer
        Needfuldoer
        February 19, 2023 at 2:42 pm | #

        Your clothes will shrink less if you run the dryer on low.

  10. Dana
    Dana
    February 19, 2023 at 12:10 am | #

    Lying, yes. Lying convincingly, hell no.

    • anon
      anon
      February 19, 2023 at 12:55 am | #

      I mean it depends on what ur technical definition of it, considering a shaking washing machine isn’t rly that strong of a force

      tho it’d be hilarious if just yelling at someone ‘you are very convinced’ actually worked

      • Clif
        Clif
        February 19, 2023 at 1:13 am | #

        The power of positive thinking.

      • Schpoonman
        Schpoonman
        February 19, 2023 at 2:28 am | #

        Like the Orc Rogue with a bloated charisma stat who “sneaks” via intimidation checks.

        • milu
          milu
          February 19, 2023 at 5:33 pm | #

          immediately braining every person who sees you is technically sneaking!

          …or is it :questioning-emoji-except-it’s-an-orc:

  11. saltchocolate
    saltchocolate
    February 19, 2023 at 12:11 am | #

    Sarah, let her have her afterglow!

    • anon
      anon
      February 19, 2023 at 12:52 am | #

      i imagine the next strip will either be sarah ‘encouraging’ her to do it more, or joyce going back to being a ‘bundle of nerves’ and semi-offended like “stop thinking about me doing/that/’ or so ?

  12. The Wellerman
    The Wellerman
    February 19, 2023 at 12:11 am | #

    oops my keyboard slipped

    https://twitter.com/NGtheWelllerman/status/1627174612126797825

    • Screwball
      Screwball
      February 19, 2023 at 6:06 am | #

      Chug chug chug chug chug chug…

  13. Yotomoe
    Yotomoe
    February 19, 2023 at 12:12 am | #

    https://imgur.com/a/JnTOmmX
    Earlier on twitter Willis was messing around with Joyce’s outfit so I took his drawing and drew my own Joyce outfit on her. I think it fits!

    • The Wellerman
      The Wellerman
      February 19, 2023 at 12:14 am | #

      NGL, this is enough to make gay little me melt 🫠

      Splendid edit!

    • Kyrik Michalowski
      Kyrik Michalowski
      February 19, 2023 at 12:17 am | #

      That does in fact look like something Joyce would wear. It’s all bright and cheery like she is, and Sarah would probably make a comment about it.

      Well done dude. 🙂

    • RassilonTDavros
      RassilonTDavros
      February 19, 2023 at 12:36 am | #

      I like it!

    • anon
      anon
      February 19, 2023 at 12:42 am | #

      i’m not the hugest fan of yellow personally but it does suit joyce. being a ‘sunshine girl’ lol.

      • Mark
        Mark
        February 19, 2023 at 8:19 am | #

        She was positively ravishing in that yellow dress she wore for her date with Joe. It suits her.

        • Schpoonman
          Schpoonman
          February 19, 2023 at 8:08 pm | #

          I hope she breaks it back out for another date with Joe without the full outfit on underneath.

    • Needfuldoer
      Needfuldoer
      February 19, 2023 at 7:58 am | #

      “Yellow Doug Funnie Joyce” isn’t something I expected to see today.

      The only thing I don’t get about the original version of that character model is the tiny vest; I’ve never seen someone wearing something like that. I think one of those slightly poofy outerwear vests would make more sense.

  14. Joyfulldreams
    Joyfulldreams
    February 19, 2023 at 12:14 am | #

    You know. I don’t understand how this is a thing. Is this genuinely a thing, that an orgasm has the power to just…outwardly alter someone’s mood this drastically for up to DAYS afterwards?

    Like. I masturbate. It does not have this effect on me. Is this an ace thing, not getting this? I enjoy orgasms plenty, but this just seems silly.

    • Doctor_Who
      Doctor_Who
      February 19, 2023 at 12:17 am | #

      Pretty sure that A) she’s at the very least gone back for seconds and B) it’s more the years of repression finally getting released. We know Joyce. She is HORNY and always has been. She never had a way to deal with it until now.

      • The Wellerman
        The Wellerman
        February 19, 2023 at 12:27 am | #

        😭🥹

    • Mano308gts
      Mano308gts
      February 19, 2023 at 12:19 am | #

      Nah, I’m 100% with you on this one- Getting off (regardless of context) doesn’t make a person so dramatically more ‘chill’ afterward as has been suggested by media over the years… at least not in my experience- either personal, or observational.

    • Kyrik Michalowski
      Kyrik Michalowski
      February 19, 2023 at 12:22 am | #

      I think it is not just the afterglow that Joyce is feeling, that goes away in a little while.* Joyce is also free to masturbate as she pleases now and that has her feeling good. Also after not touching herself for her whole life, I can imagine it would be something she’s happier than most.

      *Depending on the person

    • not someone else
      not someone else
      February 19, 2023 at 12:24 am | #

      Sometimes. Rarely. I think it’s been more like hours than days, though.

      I don’t really want to get into the circumstances but if you’ve been really pent up for like, weeks… or longer… Like, Joyce has been actively reading sexy fanfiction and hanging around someone she’s attracted to, apparently, without ever letting off steam, so if it is the same morning, it might be noticable.

      I wouldn’t immediately jump to the conclusion that was what made her calm if I were Sarah, but rule of funny I guess?

      • Joyfulldreams
        Joyfulldreams
        February 19, 2023 at 1:16 am | #

        I guess the disconnect must be that I don’t get ‘pent up’ and have no frame of reference for it outside of media. Interesting!

      • Mark
        Mark
        February 19, 2023 at 8:21 am | #

        How many hours has it been since her last trip to the laundry room, anyway? Comic time….

    • anon
      anon
      February 19, 2023 at 12:35 am | #

      well she was pretty repressed though it’d be a bit insensitive to say to an ace or sex repulsed person stuff like “oh x needs to get laid”, tho that always seemed silly to me, even with sexually active ppl, plenty have seemed like raging assholes who still take their anger out on ppl

    • Nerrin
      Nerrin
      February 19, 2023 at 12:37 am | #

      I’m reminded of a college friend who was quite Christian (though not quite as… viciously so as Joyce was) and how he was considerably less wound-up for at least a little while after he got married and finally had his own moral permission to bang.

      Also, comedic exaggeration.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      February 19, 2023 at 12:46 am | #

      I’m like that snickers commercial. You’re not yourself when you’re hungry. Except, y’know.

      • PirateTawnee
        PirateTawnee
        February 19, 2023 at 5:00 am | #

        Horngry.

    • Bogeywoman
      Bogeywoman
      February 19, 2023 at 1:21 am | #

      Yes, but Joyce doesn’t know that and is probably the most susceptible person to placebo affect on campus

    • The Oracle
      The Oracle
      February 19, 2023 at 2:05 am | #

      As a person who’s never masturbated, I believe Joyce may have discovered the fantastic world of gay sex. We may never find out who her partner was, but I suspect Mary.

    • Amós Batista
      Amós Batista
      February 19, 2023 at 4:27 am | #

      Peharps it’s the real Joyce, you know?

    • Dandi Andi
      Dandi Andi
      February 19, 2023 at 7:23 am | #

      There’s definitely some “rule of funny” here, and that might be all it is from a writing perspective. But if it were me in that situation, I think it would be less about releasing sexual frustration and more about the process of letting go of the guilt shame and embarrassment of being a sexual person that her faith community saddled her with. She masturbated and God did not send her to the horny jail down below. Now she knows she can read a spicy fan fic and not be left to fidget in her chair in the hopes of getting off accidentally. She is, in a small but very important way, more free than she was yesterday.

    • Fay
      Fay
      February 19, 2023 at 7:28 am | #

      Yes, but this is a comic, *not* real life, and as such it frequently runs off of “Rule of Funny.“.

    • Rowan
      Rowan
      February 19, 2023 at 7:46 am | #

      For me, a quick wank won’t do much to my mood, but a really good blissful sexual experience will have me more cheery for at least a day maybe more. Ocassionally a good wank will do that for me. If this is her first time and she really enjoyed it I think this comes across as only slightly exaggerated

    • OBBWG
      OBBWG
      February 19, 2023 at 1:04 pm | #

      Several years ago, when my job was teaching at a community college, I ended a several month sexual drought. The next day, halfway through my first class (Accounting 101), one of my students raised her hand and asked “Did you finally get laid last night?”

      I admitted I did. Everyone murmured their agreement that it showed.

    • Roborat
      Roborat
      February 22, 2023 at 3:39 pm | #

      I have observed that it does have this affect on some people in my life, and it has lasted for several days on occasion.

  15. Chaucer59
    Chaucer59
    February 19, 2023 at 12:20 am | #

    The power of cumming compels you!

  16. BBCC
    BBCC
    February 19, 2023 at 12:31 am | #

    You will NEVER be able to lie to big sis, Joyce, accept it. XD

    • anon
      anon
      February 19, 2023 at 12:36 am | #

      inb4 sarah buys joyce her own vibe so she doesn’t need to depend on the washing machine (tho given how she said it ‘doesn’t count if it’s an accident’ , maybe something like a massaging chair?lol)

      • The Oracle
        The Oracle
        February 19, 2023 at 2:06 am | #

        Vibes are like tarot cards. They work better if somebody else buys them for you.

      • DailyBrad
        DailyBrad
        February 19, 2023 at 4:01 am | #

        Yeah, I could totally see a sex shop visit in their future, or maybe just a bullet vibe. Guessing Joyce isn’t exactly looking for insertion at this time.

    • Needfuldoer
      Needfuldoer
      February 19, 2023 at 2:40 pm | #

      Sarah sees right through the lie in that speech bubble. (Why else would she be staring it down?)

  17. Slartibeast Button, BIA
    Slartibeast Button, BIA
    February 19, 2023 at 12:33 am | #

    Joyce starts speaking like a video game!

    It’s super ineffective!

  18. Suet
    Suet
    February 19, 2023 at 12:33 am | #

    That calmness lasted long. 😶 🤌 🤌 Wish it lasted longer.

    Doesn’t look like she has banged half the town like a frenzied Tasmanian Devil yet, tho.

    • The Wellerman
      The Wellerman
      February 19, 2023 at 12:41 am | #

      Give her a bit, it’s only gonna escalate from here. XD

    • anon
      anon
      February 19, 2023 at 12:50 am | #

      even with a bit more ‘sexual freedom’, other than joe i don’t think she’d go around hooking up with everyone unless she goes back to her hometown to proposition every churchgoer boy she ever had a crush on or so lol (like didn’t she ‘stalk’ a boy at a certain church/choose between diff morning services, other than her family ‘changing’ churches now and then idk how common it would be to go to a diff church every week/choosing between certain times)

      • Ed Callahan
        Ed Callahan
        February 19, 2023 at 7:37 am | #

        It would be a good way to play off the Ruth quote. On the other hand, Willis kind of explored the same theme back when Ethan cut loose a bit after getting together with Mike. A compromise approach might to the Joyce/Joe hook up happening.
        A lot.

  19. UrsulaDavina
    UrsulaDavina
    February 19, 2023 at 1:27 am | #

    Worst attempt at the Jedi mind trick ever!

  20. TrueVCU
    TrueVCU
    February 19, 2023 at 1:57 am | #

    I love it when Joyce gets that hollow pupil “my soul has left my body” look in her eyes XD

  21. Kyrik Michalowski
    Kyrik Michalowski
    February 19, 2023 at 2:10 am | #

    I’m guessing Sarah will be proud of Joyce. Unless somehow Joyce tells her how it happened, then she might have some questions.

    On the bright side, this means Joyce is one step closer to owning her first sex toy. Probably a vibrator and she can uhh… “upgrade,” if she ever needs/wants to.

  22. Rabid Rabbit
    Rabid Rabbit
    February 19, 2023 at 2:17 am | #

    “Just so you know, Other Jacob is off-limits to you. Got it? And if you don’t got it, for non-existent God’s sake, sterilize him after you’ve used him.”

    • Taffy
      Taffy
      February 19, 2023 at 2:18 am | #

      Probably best to do the same with Normal Jacob, as well. Just to be sure. A good scrub-down never hurts after some nice 1v1 time.

  23. milu
    milu
    February 19, 2023 at 4:49 am | #

    I haven’t been reading QC for a bit but damn if Joyce isnt channeling horny flustered Marigold energy in that last panel

  24. milu
    milu
    February 19, 2023 at 4:54 am | #

    In fairness to Joyce she did convincingly lie about not being in love. Not that she’s necessarily in love with Joe but a truthful answer to that question would probably not be “nope, daddy-o coolsville”

    Although it might still involve the word daddy, idk

  25. Axel
    Axel
    February 19, 2023 at 6:01 am | #

    Please make the connection then tell her about non-laundry options

  26. Needfuldoer
    Needfuldoer
    February 19, 2023 at 7:51 am | #

    Did Joyce get all her “cool” slang from old beatnik movies, or A Pup Named Scooby-Doo?

    • Daibhid C
      Daibhid C
      February 19, 2023 at 8:05 am | #

      I don’t imagine Joyce would have been allowed to watch either of those things growing up. (Well, maybe the beatnik movies that were all “These are beatniks. They are bad and evil and want to destroy America with their non-rhyming poetry.”)

  27. Daibhid C
    Daibhid C
    February 19, 2023 at 8:04 am | #

    “I’m hip, I’m hep, I’m one swinging chick!”
    “Okay, the only one of those than anyone still says is ‘swinging’, and it no longer means what you think it means.”

  28. Sajuuk-Khar
    Sajuuk-Khar
    February 19, 2023 at 8:36 am | #

    SARAH CLINTON, ORGASM SLEUTH

    • Sajuuk-Khar
      Sajuuk-Khar
      February 19, 2023 at 8:38 am | #

      SHE’S THE BENOIT BLANC OF CUM

      • Emperor Norton II
        Emperor Norton II
        February 19, 2023 at 12:44 pm | #

        “Cumlumbo” was right there.

        • JBento
          JBento
          February 19, 2023 at 2:54 pm | #

          Sherlock Comes

        • DailyBrad
          DailyBrad
          February 19, 2023 at 10:05 pm | #

          Well, that’s a whole lot better than Jessica Felcher.

    • Caro
      Caro
      February 19, 2023 at 3:33 pm | #

      this is how i learned sarah’s last name

  29. ValdVin
    ValdVin
    February 19, 2023 at 8:47 am | #

    After her next load of laundry, Joyce’s slang will further retrograde.

    I hope Sarah knows what a Stutz Bearcat, raccoon coat, and “Oh, You Kid!” are.

    • Needfuldoer
      Needfuldoer
      February 19, 2023 at 9:48 am | #

      She’s the jaunty jackanapes with moxie and pizzazz.

    • Sajuuk-Khar
      Sajuuk-Khar
      February 19, 2023 at 10:24 am | #

      She’s been drinking bootleg hooch and listening to the jazz!!

      • UnDrewsual
        UnDrewsual
        February 19, 2023 at 11:35 am | #

        Bo-do-do-dee-o-do
        It’s the Joyce!

        • Needfuldoer
          Needfuldoer
          February 19, 2023 at 11:38 am | #

          *Doo-wacka-doo-wacka-doo

  30. Mr.Morningstar
    Mr.Morningstar
    February 19, 2023 at 12:21 pm | #

    So convinced

  31. Segnosaur
    Segnosaur
    February 19, 2023 at 12:43 pm | #

    Well technically Joyce isn’t lying. She didn’t exactly masturbate. Just say on a vibrating dryer. Didn’t actually do anything TOO herself.

    • Emperor Norton II
      Emperor Norton II
      February 19, 2023 at 12:46 pm | #

      Oh, she did put her hands down there as well. Dorothy had to leave the laundry room for a reason.

      • TerribleTransit
        TerribleTransit
        February 19, 2023 at 5:08 pm | #

        It’s up in the air whether she sent Dorothy out because she was taking up the offer to use her fingers more privately, or if she simply didn’t want Dorothy to see her climax as the thigh-rubbing finally got her there. Neither reading is explicitly confirmed in the comic.

  32. wakeangel2001
    wakeangel2001
    February 19, 2023 at 12:53 pm | #

    if you do it every day nobody cares, if you’ve done it for the first time in the entire 6 months she’s known you she’s gonna notice

  33. Taffy
    Taffy
    February 19, 2023 at 2:11 pm | #

    Since the topic of masturbation has come up and it’s kinda related:

    I keep getting Jehovah’s Witnesses coming to my door in their creepy unmarked black SUVs, knocking on the door despite us telling them we’re not interested. I’m sick of it, so I’m thinking about being completely naked next time they show up, instead of going through the effort of getting dressed like I usually do. I wouldn’t be answering the door or even acknowledging they exist. Our driveway is long as fuck and there’s 0% visibility into the windows from the road during the day, so I wouldn’t be flashing the public or anything. I’ve told them to go away at least ten times and they won’t take the hint. Is passively being naked in my own home while some creep squints through the high-placed window on my front door in any way a form of sexual harassment? I want them to be disgusted by my weird body and leave on their own, without me doing anything other than playing my video game and being coincidentally naked. Absolutely zero effort on my part to make sure they see, to be extremely clear; you have to really try to see anything from outside my apartment, like at least 5 steps of effort to even open the screen door.

    I just wanna make sure I’m not gonna get arrested for being naked in my own home, when they’re the ones harassing me. Not remotely asking for legal advice (as if this is the place lmao), just curious before I decide whether they’re worth putting pants on for when I normally sit at home naked and only bother if somebody knocks. Like, is that in any way on me if they spend a full minute trying to see me in my unlit gamer cave?

    • The Oracle
      The Oracle
      February 19, 2023 at 2:28 pm | #

      What the fuck is this question? Based on your description, it sounds like you live in some sort of featureless concrete garage with a porthole on the door, a door which is located at the back of the building or something. Those must be some extraordinarily determined JWs if they’re still coming up to the door and not expecting to get their kidneys stolen. I think as long as you’re not pressing yourself up against your single 8-foot-high window and jelqing in their faces, you’re… probably fine? And I thought my house was weird.

      • Needfuldoer
        Needfuldoer
        February 19, 2023 at 4:05 pm | #

        Sounds like an ideal gamer dungeon to me.

        • Taffy
          Taffy
          February 19, 2023 at 4:41 pm | #

          It does, and if I were single I’d totally try to find a setup like that.

    • Sporky
      Sporky
      February 19, 2023 at 3:46 pm | #

      Can’t you just like… put up a sign on your door that tells them to fuck off instead of whatever the hell this is?

      • Taffy
        Taffy
        February 19, 2023 at 4:39 pm | #

        Tried that. They visit even more than before. I know I come off as a very level-headed individual with nerves of steel in these comments (/s), but I’m honestly extremely paranoid for trauma reasons that aren’t necessarily relevant, and these nonstop unexpected* visits from cultists make me freak out when I hear tires on gravel now, so I’m basically at my wit’s end and in need of a desperate solution that won’t get me arrested.

        *Okay, kind of unexpected. I know they’re coming by now, just not when, so I can’t say “Oh, it’s the third Sunday of the month, better make myself scarce.”

    • milu
      milu
      February 19, 2023 at 6:12 pm | #

      being naked inside your own house sounds like peak not-a-crime honestly.

      i do wonder why they keep coming back though, like why do they bother when you are evidently not recruitable? not that you would know, probably.

      • Needfuldoer
        Needfuldoer
        February 19, 2023 at 6:58 pm | #

        Being naked in your own home definitely isn’t a crime.

        Answering the door naked is another matter, since you’re deliberately exposing yourself (heyo) to other people. Probably best to hide the bits behind the door, while still being very obviously naked.

        https://www.itswalky.com/comic/could-you-come-back/

        Drop hints about being “late for the ritual”, for good measure.

        • Taffy
          Taffy
          February 19, 2023 at 7:04 pm | #

          Ya know what, “The Ritual” is one of my favorite punchlines. I might have to try that.

        • Morleuca
          Morleuca
          February 19, 2023 at 7:23 pm | #

          I knew a guy back when I was in college who would open the door wearing a hockey mask pushed up and carrying a machete if he wasn’t expecting anyone.

      • Taffy
        Taffy
        February 19, 2023 at 6:58 pm | #

        Maybe it’s like with bronies, where the more you don’t wanna join, the more they want you? Maybe they relish the challenge. Maybe they get off on it. I really, sincerely wish I knew, so I could make it stop.

        I was really nice to the first lady who came by, aside from giving her a fake name and kinda rushing to get her gone, so that explains the first couple of tries, but sometimes they don’t even get out of the car before they leave, even when the lights are on and I’m visibly looking through the blinds at them.

        • ButWhyASpoon
          ButWhyASpoon
          February 19, 2023 at 9:48 pm | #

          Join the Herd. It’s 20% Cooler.

          • Taffy
            Taffy
            February 19, 2023 at 10:45 pm | #

            I joined the herd in like 2013 and stuck around for a couple years. That’s actually how I got into tabletop RPGs.

  34. Caro
    Caro
    February 19, 2023 at 3:31 pm | #

    quick, someone make a ‘coolsville sucks’ meme

  35. Dr. T
    Dr. T
    February 19, 2023 at 3:52 pm | #

    Remember when Sarah said she was never around for the fun stuff, just the messes that come afterwards? That’s was almost word for word what she said after Becky kissed Joyce.

  36. Van Jelaous
    Van Jelaous
    February 19, 2023 at 4:52 pm | #

    If you want to learn how to talk “hip”, you must learn from the master himself, Lord Buckley!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U0x5x8lyON8

  37. Jonah Sanville
    Jonah Sanville
    February 19, 2023 at 5:12 pm | #

    if i wasn’t super in love with my icon, i’d be using panel 3 joyce “daddy-o”

    i’m still saving it

    • Alex
      Alex
      February 19, 2023 at 7:14 pm | #

      Personally I like the “coolsville” one.

  38. JessWitt
    JessWitt
    February 19, 2023 at 5:43 pm | #

    Well I’m just glad Sarah figured it out right away. Now to see if Joyce will keep on sailing down the Nile.

  39. Grant
    Grant
    February 19, 2023 at 5:47 pm | #

    Whoa, Joyce, I know you grew up thinking masturbation was a slippery slope to all kinds of sexual depravity, but it’s not slippery enough to get you all the way to ‘master hypnotist’ by day 2.

  40. Rikunda
    Rikunda
    February 19, 2023 at 11:53 pm | #

    I have never had an orgasm THAT good…

    • The Wellerman
      The Wellerman
      February 19, 2023 at 11:56 pm | #

      awe…. 🙁

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