Dumbing of Age Book Twelve

Dumbing of Age

A college webcomic by David Willis
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May 12, 2026

Unbedhead

by David M Willis on June 7, 2023 at 12:01 am
  • 04 – But Don't Give Yourself Away
└ Tags: carol, joe, joyce

Discussion (207) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. Ana Chronistic
    Ana Chronistic
    June 7, 2023 at 12:01 am | #

    Joe: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ht09fEGgPLM

    Joyce: ALLOW ME A DEMONSTRATION

    • Ana Chronistic
      Ana Chronistic
      June 7, 2023 at 12:02 am | #

      I made a world where EVERYTHING can verb

      Names? Joyceing just means “to be Joyce”

      • Kyoulkoa
        Kyoulkoa
        June 7, 2023 at 12:03 am | #

        The Joycening

        • Bogeywoman
          Bogeywoman
          June 7, 2023 at 12:39 am | #

          Joyceing if Age

          • Bogeywoman
            Bogeywoman
            June 7, 2023 at 12:40 am | #

            After all the minute I spent figuring out how to write “joyceing” and forgetting how even spell her name I fuck up “of”

            • Clif
              Clif
              June 7, 2023 at 2:37 am | #

              Welcome to Common Englishing Mistakes 101.

      • vulcanodon
        vulcanodon
        June 7, 2023 at 10:40 am | #

        “ReJoyceing” is when you were someone else for a moment then went back to being Joyce again

      • Just_IDD
        Just_IDD
        June 7, 2023 at 8:47 pm | #

        What about rejoycing?

  2. V
    V
    June 7, 2023 at 12:03 am | #

    Congrats on your new beardbending powers, Joyce

    • Puppeteer Nessus
      Puppeteer Nessus
      June 7, 2023 at 12:07 am | #

      Beardbending. Can it be done from a distance? What are its limitations? Can one use this power for crime fighting?

      • Thag Simmons
        Thag Simmons
        June 7, 2023 at 12:10 am | #

        Usually when Superheroes have hair powers it’s their own hair

        • Slartibeast Button, BIA
          Slartibeast Button, BIA
          June 7, 2023 at 1:38 am | #

          For Beard superpowers specifically, see Action Hank from Dexter’s Laboratory.

      • Switchchris
        Switchchris
        June 7, 2023 at 12:32 am | #

        It would be the best Crime Fighting power ever lol. The amount of Confusion that would cause as Criminals are suddenly being tangled up by their own 15ft long beards that they didn’t have mere seconds ago.

      • Stanistani
        Stanistani
        June 7, 2023 at 2:03 am | #

        When the superhero FolliceMan summons stubble to grow inside the villain’s throat…

        • Stanistani
          Stanistani
          June 7, 2023 at 2:04 am | #

          *FollicleMan

          • Liquid Len
            Liquid Len
            June 7, 2023 at 8:47 am | #

            Follicle Man, Fillicle Man
            Doin’ the things a follicle can

            • Peep
              Peep
              June 7, 2023 at 9:27 am | #

              How does he grow hair
              From way over there?
              Nobody knows
              Follicle Man

      • Xaeon
        Xaeon
        June 7, 2023 at 8:33 am | #

        Her arch-nemesis is an undead King Camp Gillette

    • Rowen Morland
      Rowen Morland
      June 7, 2023 at 12:26 am | #

      Wasn’t there a beard bender in Doom Patrol?

      • Thag Simmons
        Thag Simmons
        June 7, 2023 at 12:56 am | #

        that does sound like a thing Doom Patrol would do

        • morleuca
          morleuca
          June 7, 2023 at 3:03 am | #

          I very rarely become ill from watching television….

      • Hof1991
        Hof1991
        June 7, 2023 at 9:52 am | #

        Beard hunter. https://doompatrol.fandom.com/wiki/Ernest_Franklin

    • Dara
      Dara
      June 7, 2023 at 2:22 am | #

      no super-powers

    • Theluxland
      Theluxland
      June 7, 2023 at 7:35 am | #

      Man I wish I could have theses powers. My beard grows unusually fast and I mostly have a week beard after 24 hours. I would make my life so much easier if I could just revert it on the spot.

      • TheScreenJockey
        TheScreenJockey
        June 7, 2023 at 7:45 am | #

        I knew a guy in the Marine Corps who kept getting in trouble for not being properly clean-shaven, and he eventually had to GET A DOCTOR to verify that his facial hair was simply so dark, coarse, and grew so quickly that the only way he could possibly meet the Corps’ grooming standard would be to shave 2-3 times a day, which could be very bad for his skin. So he got a “beard chit,” which allowed him to simply let it grow out to a full beard, so long as he kept it “well-groomed.”

        • Loki
          Loki
          June 7, 2023 at 8:43 am | #

          That must have been an amazing piece of paperwork, both in its mundane nature and yet in the implications in the need for its existence.

          • Just_IDD
            Just_IDD
            June 7, 2023 at 8:54 pm | #

            Not really. See there is a way to do nearly everything in the military services it just requires someone know how to ask for the proper questions of the proper people. The beard chit is simply one of those things. It exists for several contingencies.

            • Kirt Dankmyer
              Kirt Dankmyer
              June 8, 2023 at 8:33 am | #

              I’m always impressed by the contingencies covered by military bureaucracy.

  3. Yearofthecat
    Yearofthecat
    June 7, 2023 at 12:03 am | #

    Stubble just can’t catch a break

  4. DailyBrad
    DailyBrad
    June 7, 2023 at 12:04 am | #

    Amazing, simply amazing.

    Poor Joe, poor Joe’s jaw.

  5. True Survivor
    True Survivor
    June 7, 2023 at 12:04 am | #

    Either A) There was never stubble – Joyce had just smeared chocolate all over Joe’s face that morning and then rubbed it off
    B) Joyce has gone from Christianity to Atheism to Satanism cause that is some witch craft.

    • Doctor_Who
      Doctor_Who
      June 7, 2023 at 12:09 am | #

      I all seriousness, I knew a girl in college who went through basically entirely Joyce’s arc – raised as a fundie Christian, lost her faith due to finally living in the real world for a while at school.

      The Wiccan phase is next, mark my words.

      • Proxiehunter
        Proxiehunter
        June 7, 2023 at 12:12 am | #

        It’s not a phase mom.

      • Rose by Any Other Name
        Rose by Any Other Name
        June 7, 2023 at 12:19 am | #

        Not to be a jerk, but it is somewhat uncool to refer to anyone’s religion as a phase.

        • Doctor_Who
          Doctor_Who
          June 7, 2023 at 12:31 am | #

          Apologies, didn’t mean for it to come off as dismissive.

          • Clif
            Clif
            June 7, 2023 at 3:07 am | #

            Somehow, I doubt that’s nearly as dismissive as True Survivor equating witchcraft and Satanism.

            Pretty sure if you’re Wiccan, you don’t believe in Satan, much less worship them.

            • Skater Girl
              Skater Girl
              June 7, 2023 at 8:11 am | #

              Satanists don’t believe in Satan either.

              • McNitz
                McNitz
                June 7, 2023 at 8:28 am | #

                Depends on the Satanist, I’ve encountered some online that do believe Satan is real and is just actually the good guy in the Bible.

                • Seregiel
                  Seregiel
                  June 7, 2023 at 12:56 pm | #

                  As an atheist, can confirm Satan is a pretty swell guy.

                • NGPZ
                  NGPZ
                  June 7, 2023 at 4:23 pm | #

                  Yeah, compared with the genocidal Yahweh, the biblical Satan seems millions of times more innocent.

              • Capt Calamity
                Capt Calamity
                June 7, 2023 at 12:31 pm | #

                You are confusing Satanism with the Satanic Temple, which is a non-theistic religious organization.

        • HueSatLight
          HueSatLight
          June 7, 2023 at 12:51 am | #

          Or their irreligion.

        • Opus the Poet
          Opus the Poet
          June 7, 2023 at 7:57 pm | #

          My dear departed mother was convinced my Pagan religion was “just a phase” and I would return to being her good little Southern Baptist boy after people from her church tried to convince me that the world was ending soon and we had to use up all the resources or Gawd would be angry we didn’t finish what He had prepared for us to consume. Yeah a couple of years of that and I started looking for a church that believed we had to conserve the environment so the planet was still livable when He came back.

    • Icalasari
      Icalasari
      June 7, 2023 at 6:45 am | #

      C) Joyce has realized she is in a comic and is now harnessing the Toon Force

  6. IniquitousKing
    IniquitousKing
    June 7, 2023 at 12:05 am | #

    Enjoy that faceful of ingrown hairs, Joe.

    • Dday
      Dday
      June 7, 2023 at 12:51 am | #

      ungrown

      • Taffy
        Taffy
        June 7, 2023 at 1:00 am | #

        Degrown

        • milu
          milu
          June 7, 2023 at 4:26 am | #

          Ex-grown

          • JBento
            JBento
            June 7, 2023 at 6:03 am | #

            The Bearded Formerly Known as Joe

            • HueSatLight
              HueSatLight
              June 7, 2023 at 10:37 am | #

              Was-kers

              • Carms
                Carms
                June 7, 2023 at 11:33 am | #

                Waskers is so good thank you

              • milu
                milu
                June 7, 2023 at 1:31 pm | #

                Oh no i just awarded top comment to yoto with his own cheeky pun, you’ll have to share this one 😘🤌

              • anonymsly
                anonymsly
                June 7, 2023 at 4:57 pm | #

                That’s amazing

    • Loki
      Loki
      June 7, 2023 at 8:50 am | #

      Oh, I’m sure they’ll just eject cleanly in reaction to the benign intent behind Joyce’s orders. Her beardbending powers are smarter than she is.

  7. Reltzik
    Reltzik
    June 7, 2023 at 12:05 am | #

    …. Ma Brown has already seen Joe with his hair unkempt and his face stubbly. What’s this supposed to accomplish?

    • Carms
      Carms
      June 7, 2023 at 12:06 am | #

      this is supposed to accomplish Joyce not being thirsty in front of her mum.

    • Angel
      Angel
      June 7, 2023 at 12:24 am | #

      willingness to look presentable in front of relative? Even walky put in effort lol

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      June 7, 2023 at 12:37 am | #

      I’m certain she doesn’t have object permanence.

      • Clif
        Clif
        June 7, 2023 at 3:10 am | #

        I was going to ask which she doesn’t have object permanence, but she’s probably gone now.

  8. UrsulaDavina
    UrsulaDavina
    June 7, 2023 at 12:05 am | #

    The ability to cause beards to grow and shrink may not be the most glamorous super power but it certainly a useful one.

    • Switchchris
      Switchchris
      June 7, 2023 at 12:34 am | #

      If she can master such a ability, to be able to do it at range, it would be the greatest crime fighting power ever. Just imagine Male and female criminals alike becoming insanely confused as their new 15ft beards they didnt have mere seconds ago tangles them up allowing for easy capture lol.

  9. Pocky
    Pocky
    June 7, 2023 at 12:05 am | #

    OH NO

    NOT THE WOO

  10. tim gueguen
    tim gueguen
    June 7, 2023 at 12:05 am | #

    Speaking In Stubble, the Talking Heads album that will never happen because David Byrne and Tina Weymouth hate each other.

  11. NGPZ
    NGPZ
    June 7, 2023 at 12:06 am | #

    Joyce’s Stand Beasty Boys shows its power once more! XD

  12. Taffy
    Taffy
    June 7, 2023 at 12:07 am | #

    A “charismatic church”? Does that mean a church that can be described as charismatic, or is that like, a Charismatic Church®️ sort of deal? I mean, is it a basic adjective or proper noun?

    • NGPZ
      NGPZ
      June 7, 2023 at 12:10 am | #

      She probably means any church that has a non-zero chance of reminding you that this is the 21st century. 😑

      • JBento
        JBento
        June 7, 2023 at 6:06 am | #

        So, none of them?

      • zee
        zee
        June 8, 2023 at 8:59 am | #

        Judging by what’s happening in the third panel i think she means one of those churches that does exorcisms and getting possessed by the holy spirit n stuff. Like pentecostals.

    • Steelbright
      Steelbright
      June 7, 2023 at 12:10 am | #

      I dunno but I’m assuming it’s the kind where people are expected to have mass hysteria and start shrieking in the middle of the service

    • Proxiehunter
      Proxiehunter
      June 7, 2023 at 12:11 am | #

      Generally it means these folks https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charismatic_Christianity

      • Taffy
        Taffy
        June 7, 2023 at 12:26 am | #

        All I can think when I read about these things, even the tamer stuff, is “People really live this way?”, and I know that’s a judgmental thing to think.

        • Clif
          Clif
          June 7, 2023 at 2:41 am | #

          Good judgment is important.

      • CallynD
        CallynD
        June 7, 2023 at 12:32 am | #

        I’m honestly surprised that Joyce’s church wasn’t already one of these. It seemed culty enough.

        • Loki
          Loki
          June 7, 2023 at 8:53 am | #

          The various right wing factions of Christianity can be very judgmental of each other.

          Really, this happens everywhere. See the “left wing circular firing squad”.

          • Taffy
            Taffy
            June 7, 2023 at 10:11 am | #

            What’s this about a firing squad?

        • zee
          zee
          June 8, 2023 at 9:03 am | #

          Different types of cults. like, Amish vs Mormon vs this stuff
          I was gonna out Jehovas witness in there too but i actually have no idea what their services are like or how they’d compare to the others. I assume they’re very boring.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      June 7, 2023 at 12:36 am | #

      What is the Charisma modifier on a church?

      • Taffy
        Taffy
        June 7, 2023 at 12:38 am | #

        It’s gotta be pretty high, to suck in so many people. And to convince them they need to build a new one every few fucking years, making sure to pop one on every street corner they can.

      • Loki
        Loki
        June 7, 2023 at 8:54 am | #

        Depends on what its player rolled at chargen, obviously.

    • HueSatLight
      HueSatLight
      June 7, 2023 at 12:57 am | #

      She probably means faith healing, like Benny Hinn type theatrics.

      • Taffy
        Taffy
        June 7, 2023 at 12:58 am | #

        Benny Hill?

        • HueSatLight
          HueSatLight
          June 7, 2023 at 1:02 am | #

          Benny Hinn is a faith healer televangelist. Does “beseeching” pronouncements and puts his hand on someone’s head and makes them fall over. He actually uses suggestion and self-defense techniques to make them lose their balance. I saw a video of a devout Christian who was a self-defense instructor debunking him.

          • Taffy
            Taffy
            June 7, 2023 at 1:06 am | #

            You’re making it sound really entertaining, like people come up on his stage and he starts unleashing combo attacks on ’em for the Lord.

            • Taffy
              Taffy
              June 7, 2023 at 1:09 am | #

              “➡️⬇️↘️➕✊”
              Isaiah 19:87

            • HueSatLight
              HueSatLight
              June 7, 2023 at 1:51 am | #

              He cons sick people out of money by like pushing on their temples.

              • Taffy
                Taffy
                June 7, 2023 at 2:32 am | #

                Oh, so he’s a worthless leech, same as the rest of ’em. Good to know.

            • Keulen
              Keulen
              June 7, 2023 at 3:09 am | #

              Something like this, perhaps?

          • HueSatLight
            HueSatLight
            June 7, 2023 at 3:30 am | #

            The video of the self defense instructor / pastor debunking Hinn. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bffI10DDj-c&t=120s

    • TheScreenJockey
      TheScreenJockey
      June 7, 2023 at 7:48 am | #

      It’s a proper noun for a particular form of Christianity. “Getting the Holy Spirit” and “speaking in tongues” feature prominently in Charismatic Christian churches.

      The root here, BTW, is the Middle English “karisme” meaning “spiritual gift” or “divine power.”

  13. Kitschensyngk
    Kitschensyngk
    June 7, 2023 at 12:07 am | #

    Teleportation AND the ability to summon facial hair at will? What CAN’T Joyce do?

    • StClair
      StClair
      June 7, 2023 at 12:10 am | #

      Not be ND about food.

      • Slartibeast Button, BIA
        Slartibeast Button, BIA
        June 7, 2023 at 1:41 am | #

        All proper Heroes have to have Hangups. Nuff Said!

      • Pergola
        Pergola
        June 7, 2023 at 5:34 pm | #

        Or use exercise machines properly.

  14. foducool
    foducool
    June 7, 2023 at 12:09 am | #

    can’t believe it works lmfao

  15. RassilonTDavros
    RassilonTDavros
    June 7, 2023 at 12:10 am | #

    He’s reverted from Super Stud 4 to his base form.

  16. Suet
    Suet
    June 7, 2023 at 12:13 am | #

    Are you really sure there’s no SEMME in DoA? I could use Joyce’s powers on a couple of characters…

    Exhibit C of Joe as an oversized teddy bear

  17. Sirksome
    Sirksome
    June 7, 2023 at 12:13 am | #

    Joyce has complete control over facial hair I guess. Not the greatest super power you could get honestly but it’s better than nothing.

    • Switchchris
      Switchchris
      June 7, 2023 at 12:39 am | #

      It is 100% one of the best super powers ever if mastered lol. Just think of all the possibilities that would come with being able to force hair growth on people, stopping villains with their own newly grown beards as they get tangled up in it lol.

  18. BBCC
    BBCC
    June 7, 2023 at 12:13 am | #

    XD Hey, whatever works!

  19. Kirtro
    Kirtro
    June 7, 2023 at 12:13 am | #

    The last hairbender.

    • Sirksome
      Sirksome
      June 7, 2023 at 12:22 am | #

      Long ago there was peace on the clean shaven face, then the stubble nation attacked!

    • Dara
      Dara
      June 7, 2023 at 12:45 am | #

      someone get this commenter a chicken dinner because we have a certain WINNER

  20. KM
    KM
    June 7, 2023 at 12:14 am | #

    My suspension of disbelief is ruined, ruined I tell you.

    • Angel
      Angel
      June 7, 2023 at 12:23 am | #

      less believable than amber basically being an irl ver of kick ass while having social anxiety?

      • Opus the Poet
        Opus the Poet
        June 7, 2023 at 7:37 am | #

        That’s not Amber, that’s Amazi-Girl, two different people who share the same body.

        • Angel
          Angel
          June 7, 2023 at 11:08 pm | #

          even if you could disassociate, you’d still need physical strength. i know amber mentioned being in track and field during school, team sports doesn’t seem like the type of thing she’d sign up for unless she also disassociated into her amazigirl persona while doing it or doesn’t have the mental space to be anxious if she’s busy/exhausted running laps or so

    • HueSatLight
      HueSatLight
      June 7, 2023 at 12:53 am | #

      They’re just altering their perception filters.

  21. Angel
    Angel
    June 7, 2023 at 12:21 am | #

    lol i’m surprised some ppl wouldn’t keep a pocket razor (even if a bit dangerous) to do a quick shave if they have to ‘on the go’ or so lol

    • Angel
      Angel
      June 7, 2023 at 12:22 am | #

      and, carol’s surprisingly calm for this kinda behavior unless joyce acted ‘weirder’ at home/has somehow ‘forced’ some of her church peers/friends to be more ‘kempt’ around/spruce up or so

      • Sol
        Sol
        June 7, 2023 at 1:09 am | #

        Could be she’s happy to see Joyce with a boy (I don’t think Joyce has ever dated) especially considering that her best friend is a Lesbian, so she’s probably worried that Joyce has been “”””corrupted”””” by Becky.

        • Angel
          Angel
          June 7, 2023 at 2:50 am | #

          well, she did briefly date ethan before he came out

          tho i suppose with joyce having multiple brothers, putting her hand over his mouth isn’t rly that inappropriate/something that could’ve happened in a lighthearted play-fight

  22. cmd1095
    cmd1095
    June 7, 2023 at 12:22 am | #

    Either Joyce has magic powers, or Joe is trying frighteningly hard to be a good boyfriend and I am impressed either way

    • Angel
      Angel
      June 7, 2023 at 12:26 am | #

      well, if ‘5 o clock shadow’ is a thing , maybe it can be the reverse for some.

  23. Warcodered
    Warcodered
    June 7, 2023 at 12:28 am | #

    …it’s working, dear god is she strong.

  24. AbacusWizard
    AbacusWizard
    June 7, 2023 at 12:31 am | #

    In Jesus’ name, begone! …wait, Jesus might not be the right name to invoke to banish a beard.

    • Mark
      Mark
      June 7, 2023 at 7:07 pm | #

      Could be taking all of the world’s beards onto Himself.

  25. Proto_Eevee
    Proto_Eevee
    June 7, 2023 at 12:34 am | #

    I thought joyce didn’t have superpowers in this universe

    • John Campbell
      John Campbell
      June 7, 2023 at 1:44 am | #

      She just has different superpowers. Instead of superstrength and the physics engine for flight, she got beard control and teleport-to-Dorothy. I’m assuming from the wildly inconsistent results that the characters are generating powers by rolling on the tables for the old Marvel FASERIP system.

      • Kirt Dankmyer
        Kirt Dankmyer
        June 8, 2023 at 8:37 am | #

        Or the STUPERPOWERS RPG tables.

        We’ll know for sure if someone gets “Summon Mariachi Band”.

  26. Joyfulldreams
    Joyfulldreams
    June 7, 2023 at 12:40 am | #

    okay I understand that this is what Joyce wants and Joe is a great boyfriend for being understanding and doing his best.

    But I still want Carol to do something BATSHIT and for Joe to get protective. For reasons.

    • Holly
      Holly
      June 7, 2023 at 1:18 am | #

      There’s a good chance Walky is going to get a chance at that with his parental lunch time, but who knows what his reaction will actually be!

      • Bryy
        Bryy
        June 7, 2023 at 4:10 am | #

        oh shit we still have THAT.

    • Theluxland
      Theluxland
      June 7, 2023 at 7:30 am | #

      Carol seem surprisingly calm this time around. Since she have glasses, she seems to be much less agressive.

      …But I wouldn’t suprised if this was a facade.

  27. Dday
    Dday
    June 7, 2023 at 12:50 am | #

    Snikt!

  28. Taffy
    Taffy
    June 7, 2023 at 12:57 am | #

    So, I’ve been slightly curious about religion in like a “see what they’re doing at that table” sorta way, but there’s not a lot of diversity for that here (xtian/”witch” and that’s it). This is probably a stupid/insensitive question, but how’s a body supposed to ease into/try out these sorta things without disrupting or upsetting people?

    • Clif
      Clif
      June 7, 2023 at 2:50 am | #

      Become a Unitarian first and then people expect you to try things out.

    • Angel
      Angel
      June 7, 2023 at 2:52 am | #

      my parents are tehcniclaly buddhist/they’re pretty chill, wen ever went to any temples if there is any in teh south tho other than doing the ‘offering incense/lighting sticks with a meal at the table for departed spirits’ we don’t do anything esp ‘religious/spiritual’

    • TerribleTransit
      TerribleTransit
      June 7, 2023 at 5:35 am | #

      For any organized/led religion you can probably find livestreams/recordings of services — a lot of places started those up during the pandemic if they didn’t already have them. Of course, most places will also welcome visitors if you just ask — recruitment is fundamentally a part of any religion’s strategy — but you do have to find them first, and there’s always the issue of them being TOO “welcoming”.

      For any more personal religions without official services it would definitely be a lot harder, but I’m sure someone has videos of 101 explaining the core of what they do.

      • Taffy
        Taffy
        June 7, 2023 at 7:50 am | #

        Goddamn it, of course there’s probably videos. I keep forgetting YouTube has more than video game history, music videos, and Zelda conspiracy theories. It might be smarter to check that way, because people being too welcoming can be really stressful and usually drives me away from new things.

    • Mark
      Mark
      June 7, 2023 at 7:09 am | #

      Talk to people you know. You’re probably acquainted with people who practice this religion or that, but haven’t become Pod People, and would be glad to discuss the topic with you calmly and let you be yourself. Such people do exist — they just don’t call attention to themselves, so we’re less aware of them.

      • Taffy
        Taffy
        June 7, 2023 at 7:34 am | #

        The only trouble here is the first 10 words. If I ever start being acquainted with people though, I’ll give it a shot.

    • milu
      milu
      June 7, 2023 at 7:26 am | #

      If you’re interested in doing this in meatspace, I’d say walk into any place of worship and ask if you can talk to someone, or maybe just sit around. Most religious communities emphasize openness, peace, connection. They will typically be pretty happy and chill with outsiders, even agnostics or atheists, respectfully engaging and wanting to learn about them. Places of worship have rules, so it’s good to ask someone what those are but they won’t freak out if you mess up, they’ll just tell you, they know you don’t know how things are done until you’re told. i’m generalizing a lot, but i’m reacting to your worry about upsetting people, and i don’t think it’s as likely as you seem to think?

      Now obviously some religious groups are bigoted or culty, so perhaps do a small bit of research online before you walk in.

      • Taffy
        Taffy
        June 7, 2023 at 7:40 am | #

        I’ll have to dig around and see if there are even any non-Christian places of worship around here. That’s like, the one religion I’m kinda good on learning about, cuz it’s fuckin’ creepy to observe.

        • Taffy
          Taffy
          June 7, 2023 at 8:04 am | #

          A quick Google search (filtered to exclude anything with “christ” in the name) brings up “Freedom From Religion groups” (sounds like a subreddit), the local Jehovah’s Witnesses (shitty filter I guess), and something called “Baha’i Faith” (sounds vaguely familiar, might look it up).

          • milu
            milu
            June 7, 2023 at 1:08 pm | #

            Don’t know a whole lot about the Baha’i but what i know i like.

            They’re a recent (19th century) religion that basically goes, “those monotheisms had some good ideas but they were founded in a very different world and are no longer adapted. Why not keep the fundamental values of spiritual connection, peace and tolerance but update all the rest?”

            They advocate for world peace, are in favour of scientific knowledge and just generally seem chill and reasonable. But like i said, i don’t know much

            • Taffy
              Taffy
              June 7, 2023 at 3:50 pm | #

              I looked into it a little bit (skimmed Wikipedia), and it seems mostly harmless? I saw something about a “voluntary 19%” tithe-like thing, which is an immediate red flag and they could apparently use a little work on their queer-inclusive policies (you can marry if you’re trans, but it’s worded to sound like only if you’ve gotten surgeries). I think this might be one my sibling was telling me about months ago.

          • HueSatLight
            HueSatLight
            June 7, 2023 at 6:26 pm | #

            Freedom From Religion Foundation is an advocacy group, advocating for the separation of church and state. They are not opposed to people being religious, but are opposed to laws and attitudes that discriminate or stigmatize the irreligious.

            Rainn Wilson (Dwight from the Office) has some explainers because he’s Bahai, I kind of stopped watching after he conflated atheism with scientific naturalism, but I expect when he gets to Bahai it’s more informative. https://bahaiteachings.org/what-is-bahai-faith-introduction-by-rainn-wilson/

            Other than Christianity and Islam, the major world religions are Buddhism and Hinduism. There’s most likely ISKCON (Hare Krishna) around, they’re a sect of Hinduism, and they love sharing info about their religion (for proselytizing). I went to a buffet once, and it turned out to be a Hare Krishna temple and I, uh, was not as bashful as I could have been fact checking the guy during his proselytizing.
            Keep in mind that Hinduism is a lot more varied than the sects of Christianity or sects of Islam, so Hare Krishnas aren’t going to really give you a good understanding of all of Hinduism.

            It’s probably difficult to find, but the best information about a religion will come from an apostate. Someone who has been out of religion long enough the hard feelings aren’t so fresh, they’ll have compassion and sympathy for people in that religion, but has a deep understanding and won’t obfuscate the silly or nasty parts. I expect I am biased, but that’s my reasoning.

    • The Oracle
      The Oracle
      June 7, 2023 at 8:13 am | #

      You could also NOT join a cult just because you’re having a midlife crisis and need some place to belong.

      • BBCC
        BBCC
        June 7, 2023 at 12:23 pm | #

        Nobody said anything about joining a cult, just because someone is interested in learning about religious diversity in a ‘oooh, whatcha doing’ way.

        • The Oracle
          The Oracle
          June 7, 2023 at 4:16 pm | #

          That’s how it stared with my uncle. Also, isn’t it a little bit privileged to treat other people’s religions as a curiosity?

          • pig
            pig
            June 7, 2023 at 4:48 pm | #

            Privileged, maybe, in the sense that not everyone has the ability to do it. But I consider it a good thing to try to better understand other people’s values, worldviews, systems of ethics, and beliefs.

            • Taffy
              Taffy
              June 7, 2023 at 5:37 pm | #

              Yeah, I’m trying to stop being so anxious/self-conscious about learning new things. I build up these ideas in my head that no matter what I try to learn, someone’s going to forcibly shove me “back in my lane”, so to speak, and then with that baseline assumption of rejection, I’ve been kinda stifling my own growth. The worst anyone can do about it is be terse with me over the internet, and there’s literally billions of other people anyway so one rude person isn’t an entire group’s mouthpiece.

          • BBCC
            BBCC
            June 7, 2023 at 5:55 pm | #

            If you treat it like something weird/bad that only weirdos/freaks do, sure, but if you’re just curious and want to learn more about people then no.

            Taffy, I wouldn’t worry. As long as you’re not being jerky, it’ll be okay.

            • Taffy
              Taffy
              June 7, 2023 at 5:58 pm | #

              Damn, there go my plans to extract religious information at knifepoint in a candle lit room.

          • Uly
            Uly
            June 7, 2023 at 11:37 pm | #

            Perhaps, but it’s not nearly as rude as treating them all like a cult.

    • BBCC
      BBCC
      June 7, 2023 at 12:22 pm | #

      If you don’t want to talk to people, there are a zillion religious books you could read. Or if you want to find more ‘lived experience’ type deals, you could find blogs by people in those religions.

      • Taffy
        Taffy
        June 7, 2023 at 3:54 pm | #

        I’m gonna admit something slightly embarrassing, but I’ve never knowingly read (or even seen) a blog and been aware I was doing it. Books though, they live at the librarby. I know books’ home address, I can find ’em easy.

        • BBCC
          BBCC
          June 7, 2023 at 5:58 pm | #

          That’s fine! But yes, there’s lots of religious memoirs and things like that too.

          I dunno if you have a university login or anything but many of them also have religious encyclopedias or databases you could look at. So would many libraries.

          • Taffy
            Taffy
            June 7, 2023 at 6:04 pm | #

            It’d have to be a library, for sure. I haven’t got enough money for a university, but libraries are (currently) free, which is exactly within my budget.

  29. Comic.phile
    Comic.phile
    June 7, 2023 at 1:08 am | #

    I’m getting Sage working vibes, and the last Cradle book just dropped haha. Does Joyce have a touch of an Icon perhaps?

    • Taffy
      Taffy
      June 7, 2023 at 1:09 am | #

      Is this an anime reference?

      • Allison Branford
        Allison Branford
        June 7, 2023 at 4:42 am | #

        Joyce has a copy of the Claire Bible.

        • Taffy
          Taffy
          June 7, 2023 at 10:43 am | #

          Okay Google: What is a Claire Bible?

          After looking it up, the answer seems to be “Yes, it’s an anime reference.”

          • Comic.phile
            Comic.phile
            June 7, 2023 at 9:46 pm | #

            Haha well maybe their reference was! I wish mine was. It would make a great anime.

      • Comic.phile
        Comic.phile
        June 7, 2023 at 9:45 pm | #

        No, its a 12 book series by Will Wight. First book is called “Unsouled,” if you wanted to check it out. Highly recommend.

  30. Needfuldoer
    Needfuldoer
    June 7, 2023 at 1:13 am | #

    “What kind of noises are those?”

    Do fundies really talk this stilted, or is this just Carol being Carol? She asked something like “what is the meaning of the symbols on your clothing” the first time she saw Joyce in her D&MM stuff during freshman family weekend.

    • Clif
      Clif
      June 7, 2023 at 2:52 am | #

      Stilted? How else would you ask the question?

      • Taffy
        Taffy
        June 7, 2023 at 9:22 am | #

        “What are you doing?” is a good start. She knows what grunting sounds like, unless she’s somehow never heard anyone exerting effort in her entire life.

    • Taffy
      Taffy
      June 7, 2023 at 9:27 am | #

      “What’s the symbolism behind the clothes you’re wearing?” So not quite as robotic but still weird as hell. She’s got a bizarre mind that runs on indecipherable logic.

      • Mark
        Mark
        June 7, 2023 at 7:40 pm | #

        Religion can affect people that way, and some groups encourage it. Everything becomes symbolic.

  31. John Campbell
    John Campbell
    June 7, 2023 at 1:46 am | #

    Yes, Joyce now worships Charisma. She’s learning to be a Diplomancer.

  32. Ray Radlein
    Ray Radlein
    June 7, 2023 at 1:51 am | #

    JOYCE BROWN: FAITH BARBER

  33. 0xKruzr
    0xKruzr
    June 7, 2023 at 1:52 am | #

    you get Turn Facial Hair at level 5 of whatever cleric she is.

  34. Bryy
    Bryy
    June 7, 2023 at 2:00 am | #

    ….. did Carol….. did Carol just fucking….. see Joyce making noises and placing her hands on Joe and then just correlate it to a church thing…. even though, contextually, it’s obviously not…..

    ….. oh god does Carol actually think Joyce is legit trying to “Pray the Stubble Away”?….

    • Alex
      Alex
      June 7, 2023 at 2:20 am | #

      No, it’s stupider than that.

      That’s all I’m going to say on the subject, it’s too stupid to explain.

      • Clif
        Clif
        June 7, 2023 at 2:48 am | #

        So you don’t understand it either.

      • Bryy
        Bryy
        June 7, 2023 at 3:14 am | #

        No, you see, I WANT TO KNOW.

        • Allison Branford
          Allison Branford
          June 7, 2023 at 4:39 am | #

          So in the book of Acts, there’s a story of the Spirit of God coming down on people and causing them to speak in languages not their own, to the surprise of the Greeks, Romans, etc, who were like “Whoa, that Israelite is speaking my language about some god.” Fast forward 1900 years, and some Southern Christian churches believe that gibberish spoken in a religious fervor, “speaking in tongues”, is the language of the Spirit of God speaking through a person’s mouth. Like any goofy post-reformation idea, there’s debate about the particulars, but that’s the broad gist.

          • Taffy
            Taffy
            June 7, 2023 at 8:20 am | #

            What I wanna know is, how do people get whipped up into that much of a lather without mind-altering substances? It’s sorta disturbing.

            • DonAshei
              DonAshei
              June 7, 2023 at 9:44 am | #

              People want control over their lives. Not necessarily outside control, but being part of this or that community can be a way of feeling in control. If only to believe you are right about something other people are wrong about.
              I think that’s the root of most fanaticism one way or another.

              • Taffy
                Taffy
                June 7, 2023 at 10:09 am | #

                What does wanting control have to do with thrashing around like you’re being electrocuted in a cartoon, spouting absolute gibberish? Makes ’em look more like they need immediate medical attention.

                • Yotomoe
                  Yotomoe
                  June 7, 2023 at 1:17 pm | #

                  I think you just described an intense orgasm.

                • milu
                  milu
                  June 7, 2023 at 1:20 pm | #

                  Yeah like Amos & Uly said. Its a trance state. Like other trance states, whether religiously ritualized or not, it’s a pretty intense experience. But i agree it might not come from an impulse towards control. If anything I’d guess the opposite, more of a (socially sanctioned) catharsis or release? @Amos do you wanna talk about your research? I’m sure it must be fascinating

                • Taffy
                  Taffy
                  June 7, 2023 at 3:58 pm | #

                  @Yotomoe You might be on to something, here. I’d totally find excuses to go to church if it involved more fuckin’.

                • Amós Batista
                  Amós Batista
                  June 7, 2023 at 7:48 pm | #

                  @Yotomoe: that’s a dangerous way of analyze this, but go on.

            • Amós Batista
              Amós Batista
              June 7, 2023 at 10:10 am | #

              I don’t know if religion, god, is real or not, but spiritual ecstasy is pretty real.
              I’ve seen the same tongue speech in many churches, and the way people have possessed is similar in another religions.

              (It’s strange and awesome, it’s a thing I’m studing currently.)

              • Amós Batista
                Amós Batista
                June 7, 2023 at 7:47 pm | #

                @milu: My main source is this video list that I’m keeping.https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLDVvC_EZqzRztRdr3LHPKpxg5iKqcWzXF
                TW: Lot of christian people.

            • Uly
              Uly
              June 7, 2023 at 1:05 pm | #

              Speaking in tongues (at least, for some people – there are presumably people who fake it) does involve a mind-altering state, which can be confirmed by putting them in an MRI while they do it.

              This doesn’t mean that they’re mentally ill. Lots of things can alter your mental state that have nothing to do with your sanity.

              It also doesn’t mean that they actually are being possessed by deities, much less that they’re speaking any sort of language. That should go without saying, but just in case….

            • HueSatLight
              HueSatLight
              June 7, 2023 at 1:12 pm | #

              There are things that put people in a heightened state of suggestion. Like lighting levels and music, to provoke overwhelming emotion, and people subconsciously act how they think it’s supposed to go.
              And some people fake it because they think it’s what’s supposed to happen and they don’t want their friends to know it’s not happening to them for real (and shun them).
              There’s literally classes to teach people to think their internal dialogue or other thoughts are actually the god of the Bible communicating with them.

              Some of the subterfuge is by design. Some of the practices are just things people did and it was successful at producing the results that perpetuated the practices. To use a loaded analogy, evolution of religious behavior.

              • HueSatLight
                HueSatLight
                June 7, 2023 at 1:50 pm | #

                From personal experience, the church primed me to think overwhelming emotions were divine. I was raised mainline protestant, for reference. Our pastor occasionally talking about “the peace that passeth understanding” from being touched by the Holy Spirit. The archaic sounding language is important, it gives the idea gravity.
                I was pretty religious, but I also had doubts about stuff, and I didn’t go in for creationism, and I generally didn’t expect other people to follow my religious strictures. But I did believe some religious based urban legends, like about divine intervention.

                Anyways, once I felt an overwhelming sense of contentment, and I thought, “this must be that peace that passeth understanding, this must be the Holy Spirit.” I didn’t speak in tongues (I already knew that was fake from watching Taxi) or shake, I just relaxed and enjoyed it. It probably helped me repress my doubts for a few years longer. And I wasn’t even in a religious setting. I was around 16, so maybe wonky brain chemistry. It was after a school play, like my short was done and I was just hanging out outside the theater with some friends, so the background level of stress I had from the play was over. The lighting was lowish, and one of my friends was the girl I kind of liked. Looking back, it’s not mysterious at all. But experiencing it, after being taught from a young age that it would be God when I felt like that, that’s how people get that way without mind-altering substances.

                • Taffy
                  Taffy
                  June 7, 2023 at 3:44 pm | #

                  Well, that seems mighty comprehensive. Thanks for sharing! It makes more sense now.

                • Amós Batista
                  Amós Batista
                  June 7, 2023 at 7:41 pm | #

                  I wonder if I were able to experience something like that, I shouldn’t abandon the faith. I have somee classes and camp services like you have described, but nothing worked to me. hahaha.

              • HueSatLight
                HueSatLight
                June 7, 2023 at 2:00 pm | #

                A briefer explanation, from the strip, “there are key changes, the key changes feel like God.”

  35. Yoursmoreisburning
    Yoursmoreisburning
    June 7, 2023 at 2:06 am | #

    Joyces list of powers continues to grow. And never fails to astound and amaze me.

  36. Alex
    Alex
    June 7, 2023 at 2:19 am | #

    Is… Joyce magical?

    Joe, you marry that girl. Right now. Her mom’s an ordained minister or something.

    • Slartibeast Button, BIA
      Slartibeast Button, BIA
      June 7, 2023 at 2:41 am | #

      Joyce is a Magical Girl?

      • Needfuldoer
        Needfuldoer
        June 7, 2023 at 3:45 am | #

        She can teleport…

  37. Keulen
    Keulen
    June 7, 2023 at 3:07 am | #

    The Dark Side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. Like un-growing your boyfriend’s facial hair, apparently.

  38. Acher4
    Acher4
    June 7, 2023 at 3:07 am | #

    Joyce does have super powers. o.O
    Horror powers! O.O

  39. Matthew Davis
    Matthew Davis
    June 7, 2023 at 3:38 am | #

    I wonder if Carol is going to take this as Joyce attempting to pray away Joe’s Jewishness. If she does that may be a road too far for him.

    • Bryy
      Bryy
      June 7, 2023 at 4:11 am | #

      …. that too.

    • Opus the Poet
      Opus the Poet
      June 7, 2023 at 7:46 am | #

      When I attended a Southern Baptist church they tried to “pray away” my wife’s Catholicism when we got married. This was when we lived in Salt Lake City in the late ’70s, so trying to out-weird the magic underwear people on their home turf…

  40. Now
    Now
    June 7, 2023 at 6:06 am | #

    HOLY MACARONI SHE HAS BEARD POWERS?????

    • Now
      Now
      June 7, 2023 at 6:07 am | #

      (I know she made it grow earlier in the day but I thought it just grew by itself because Joe had that kind of hair genetics)

      • Heavensrun
        Heavensrun
        June 7, 2023 at 9:56 am | #

        There is no “That kind of hair genetics”

        • Now
          Now
          June 7, 2023 at 11:01 am | #

          Other people had stated on the commentaries of that day that their stubble was basically back by 11AM ^^

      • HueSatLight
        HueSatLight
        June 7, 2023 at 2:10 pm | #

        Both times it’s just for the humor of it. There’s inconsequential things that happen in the strip that are visual metaphors, sight gags, exaggerations, etc. Both the “growing” and “ungrowing” could be replaced with them changing their perception, especially if Joe has whiskers that are still visible a little bit through the skin and will grow out fairly quickly anyways.
        “Grow” and “ungrow” are just funnier than her closing her eyes and saying “give me a second, I need to be visualizing you with stubble.”

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      June 7, 2023 at 1:18 pm | #

      Of course she does. She dated Ethan, after all.

      • milu
        milu
        June 7, 2023 at 1:22 pm | #

        😄 TOP COMMENT

  41. Raven
    Raven
    June 7, 2023 at 8:08 am | #

    Lol now Carol thinks Joyce is the one who’s gone off the deep end

  42. Amós Batista
    Amós Batista
    June 7, 2023 at 8:24 am | #

    God forbide me, but it will be a tragedy if Carol joins a pentecostal church, like Assembly of God.

  43. Juanoku
    Juanoku
    June 7, 2023 at 9:37 am | #

    Ok how in the FUCK

  44. The Oracle
    The Oracle
    June 7, 2023 at 9:54 am | #

    Joyce could always just kill her mom and frame Mary for it. Doesn’t seem very difficult, and it would eliminate two antagonists.

  45. Amós Batista
    Amós Batista
    June 7, 2023 at 10:12 am | #

    Superman could easily beat Lex Luthor if he get this “hair control” super power…

  46. Slartibeast Button, BIA
    Slartibeast Button, BIA
    June 7, 2023 at 10:45 am | #

    If Joyce has hair *growing* powers, I foresee an extremely lucrative career in treating baldness.

  47. TulipKitten
    TulipKitten
    June 7, 2023 at 12:12 pm | #

    … Is Carol gonna hit on Joe? Because if so, that would be hilarious.

  48. Bibliholic93
    Bibliholic93
    June 8, 2023 at 6:49 am | #

    BEGONE, 10AM SHADOW, I BANISH THEE TO THE DEPTHS OF THE DRAINSSSSS

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May 3, 2025 - FCBD @ Laughing Ogre Comics in Columbus, Ohio

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