When Tiara's pyrokinesis is finally noticed, she is captured by a magical research organization for study. If she cooperates, she could be helping to save humanity from a dire threat - but can she trust them?
Goodbye to Halos
Valerie Halla
Cuddles, gay flirting, weird feelings, and magic-fueled knife fights - it's an adventure across the queer multiverse!
Kiwi Blitz
Mary Cagle (Cube Watermelon)
Steffi thinks she can use her kiwi mech to become a superhero. This idea turns out to be very stupid.
This is Not Fiction
Nicole Mannino
What do you do when the person you're in-love with is an anonymous romance novelist? Get your best friend to hire your worst enemy for help!
Devil's Candy
Rem, Bikkuri
A lush fantasy about boy genius Kazu Decker, the girl he constructed for his 9th grade science project, and the world of devils and monsters they live in.
Stand Still, Stay Silent
Minna Sundberg
A few generations after the end of the world, a small, poorly financed research crew is sent out to rediscover whatever is left of the forbidden old world in the south.
Cassiopeia Quinn
Gunwild, Psudonym
A cute, pantsless thief is pursued across the stars by a buttoned-up military officer in the spacey, laser-filled future.
Whomp!
Ronnie
A depressed, portly, hirsute anime fan stumbles through life in the ever-pursuit of chicken nuggets and other life-shortening indulgences.
Demon's Mirror
Harry Bogosian
Based loosely off of "The Snow Queen", a story by Hans Christian Andersen, we see things take a different turn as the demons become central characters, and the side characters stick around. Yup, that's the only differences. Enjoy!
Star Trip
Gisele Weaver
Jas is a human taken from her home planet on a trip across the galaxy she will never forget.
Monsterkind
Taylor C
Wallace Foster, a young, bright-eyed human social worker, has his entire world view rocked when he's suddenly relocated into a city primarily inhabited by monsters.
Star Impact
Jack McGee
A young, energetic woman fights her way up in the world of super-powered boxing after discovering the mighty gloves of her missing idol!
Tigress Queen
Allison Shaw
A barbarian warlord and a pampered prince try to avoid a marriage alliance that could end decades of violence.
Girl Genius
Phil Foglio, Kaja Foglio
In a time when the Industrial Revolution has become an all-out war, Mad Science rules the World...with mixed success.
Monster Pulse
Magnolia Porter Siddell
Four kids run afoul of a creepy secret organization's experiments, which turn their body parts into fighting monsters. Part sentimental coming-of-age story, part monster-training shonen manga, with just a bit of sci-fi body horror.
Never Satisfied
Taylor Robin
Lucy Marlowe, a magician's apprentice, competes against other apprentices for an important, magical, Goverment Job.
Sam & Fuzzy
Sam Logan
Troubled by gangster rodents, lovesick vampire stalkers, or confused ninja assassins? Don't panic! Sam and Fuzzy are here to help. (For a reasonable fee.)
Between Failures
Jackie Wohlenhaus
The low stakes adventures of an assorted group of 20 somethings trapped in the declining years of American retail. They are naughty and say lots of swears.
Cyanide & Happiness
Explosm
Satire, dark humor and surreal humor.
Knights Errant
J.R. Doyle
Wilfrid's humble quest for revenge becomes bigger and bloodier by the day.
Ghost Junk Sickness
Studio CARTRIDGE, Laura Lee
Two hunters try to survive and end up being pushed to pursue a deadly bounty dubbed "The Ghost".
Lilith's Word
inkPangur
If you had the power to make any wish come true using just one word, what would you say?
Kochab
Sarah Webb
A YA F/F fantasy comic about Sonya, a lost skier trying to survive a snowy wilderness and find her way back to her village; and Kyra - a fire spirit trying to fix the home that she let fall apart around her.
The Automan's Daughter
Mike Stamm
Aisha Osman and her uncle Siddig outwit bikers, spies and kidnappers while gearing up for a showdown with the formidable Widowmaker mecha.
The Lonely Vincent Bellingham
Diana Huh
Vincent is an unkind man looking to disappear, and finds himself in the care of a vampire and her two wicked children.
Dumbing of Age
David M Willis
Joyce has been homeschooled her entire life until now, when she's suddenly a freshman in college! Things don't go well.
Real Science Adventures
Brian Clevinger
Spin off stories and other adventures from the world of Atomic Robo!
Empowered
Adam Warren
A sexy superhero comedy (except when it isn't) about the never-ending struggles of a plucky but very unlucky young superheroine.
Sufficiently Remarkable
Maki Naro
Two young women living in Brooklyn discover that you're always coming of age.
The Witch Door
Anni K.
Katariina Lehto discovers her neighbor is a witch called Jousia Muotka. Jousia introduces Katariina to the strange people and places beyond the witch door...
Wilde Life
Pascalle Lepas
Oscar decided to rent an old haunted house, and that's when things got weird...
Lighter Than Heir
Melissa Albino
A young Volant woman joins the military in an effort to upstage her war-hero father.
Astral Aves
Moon Cabal
A fantasy coming-of-age following the adventures of Astra The Black and friends, as they navigate the mysterious world around them. It's politics, adventure, and the supernatural; oh, and crazy hair.
Alice and the Nightmare
Misha Krivanek
Alice finally attends University to learn to collect the dreams of humans, meet new friends, and deal with a pesky reflection along the way.
Fireweeds Moors
Gato Iberico
A cat-headed man and a girl with a sandwich hankering accidentally end up in a myth-infused country where magic chalices are a really big thing.
Anarchy Dreamers
Emily Ree
Sparkly undead kids fight society's worst Nightmares in this pastel-punk urban fantasy coming-of-age!
Cut Time
Juby
Rel and her trusty avian friend Fugue are on a quest to save a world that's lost track of time. Follow them and their new recruits, in a story written with help from the stars.
Awaken
Koti Saavedra/Flipfloppery
Superpowers, monsters and conspiracies. Piras, the spoiled Dameschi heir, fights to recover his identity after becoming a terrorist!
Love Not Found
Gina Biggs
Abeille is on a quest to find someone who wants to do it the old-fashioned way in a time when touching has become outdated.
Widdershins
Kate Ashwin
A series of light-hearted Victorian-era adventure stories featuring grumpy bounty hunters, accidental thiefkings, and more, in England's magical capital city Widdershins!
Sister Claire
Yamino
In the troubled aftermath of a great war between Witches and her fellow Nuns, novice Sister Claire just wants a purpose.
Starhammer
J.N. Monk, Harry Bogosian
A teen girl inherits a powerful alien artifact and proceeds to make a series of increasingly poor decisions
The End
August Brown, Cory Brown
Two aliens crash a sci-fi convention and accidentally take seven nerds on an adventure that spans the galaxy!
El Goonish Shive
Dan Shive
WARNING: This comic often ignores the Laws of Physics
Go Get a Roomie
Clover
Experience the queer journey of an upbeat hippie and the friendships she makes along the way! A tale of self-discovery and love of many forms.
Caramel Corn
Potchimew
Sarah is the only human left in a world full of mythical creatures and monsters. All she wants to do is live a quiet life, but everything changes when she meets her guardian angel, Jacob.
Godslave
Meaghan Carter
Edith has been thrown into the dangerous world of modern-day Egyptian mythology. Fighting monsters and dealing with family drama of godly proportions.
Guilded Age
T Campbell, John Waltrip, Florence Machina
Welcome to the saga of the working-class adventurer! Enjoy the complete story with new annotations daily!
Hazy London
Scotty
A story about messy relationships. From friendly foes to crazy families. Nothing is black and white, just full of color. But, all colors can get a little hazy...
Nerf Now!!
Josué Pereira
A cute webcomic about fanservice, video games, and... love. Mostly video games, though.
Jailbird
Charlie Davis
An all-ages comic about a recently escaped prisoner's struggle to understand the outside world, and vice-versa. Also, a magic cape!
[un]Divine
Ayme
A highschool senior thought giving up his soul for a demon was a good idea. It wasn't.
Atomic Robo
Brian Clevinger, Scott Wegener
The robot punches monsters and bad robots and one time he was a cowboy.
Paranatural
Zack Morrison
Superpowered middle schoolers fight evil spirits in their rural hometown. Come for the jokes, stay for the cast, the creatures, and the mystery that ties them all together!
The Sanity Circus
Windy
Magic, monsters and mysteries await in the odd city of Sanity. It's up to Attley and a colorful group of characters to find out just what is going on.
BOOKMARK Click "Tag Page" to bookmark a page. When you return to the site, click "Goto Tag" to continue where you left off.
BUFFER WATCH
Comics are currently drawn and uploaded through:
I think prom as a concept was only a big deal in movies. I remember my prom which was over a decade ago mind you, being really boring. I remember drinking lots of free soda then me and my two friends and a small group of others went bowling at the local arcade after like 20 minutes there.
I remember dressing up for Prom was fun.
I also remember not having a date, showing up alone, meeting friends there, dancing in a vague group… and that’s about it.
In retrospect, getting eaten out woulda been way more fun. Point Malaya.
I remember NOT dressing up for prom was fun. Ripped jeans, t-shirt, and not giving a fuck was actually more fun than I’d expected. I was going to skip it until my mother forbade me from going because it would embarrass my sister, who was in junior high and had been invited to the prom by her idiot boyfriend. That didn’t work out well for her, I was 18 and had my own car.
The after party was at a friend’s house, there was drinking and watching movies. I don’t think there was any sex that night, might have been, hard to remember 35 years later.
See, after parties were apparently where it was at.
I did not have any after party invitations.
It did not help, I think, that Freshman year, I ended up as part of an upper classman friend group. My school had strict rules that only Juniors and Seniors could go to prom, so the years that fun things could have happened, I couldn’t go. And then when it was my turn, all my best friends had graduated already.
I had fun at my prom. I went as the Masque of the Red Death, made my own mask and everything. Inexplicably, I was the only one there who chose that theme (small class of like 125, but it still felt like an obvious choice for a masquerade).
Not gonna lie, that does sound pretty fuckin sweet.
Actually, I did something a little similar. While I couldn’t quite get away with actual historic cosplay, I went with the most Victorian-looking dress I could find.
There was, prehaps, more than one reason I did not have a date. ^^;;
If I’d known someone was going to my prom in the most victorian dress they could find I’d have worn a frock coat and top hat and gone with them instead of staying home and… well, I don’t remember what I did that night, or what night it was, being mumblety-mumble years ago.
Eh, prom was fun for what it was – a night to get dressed up super fancy, hang out with your friends and go ‘thank fuck we’re almost done high school’. If that’s not your thing then yeah it’s not that big a deal. One of my friends didn’t go and she seemed totally fine with that, though we missed hanging out with her that night.
My date wasn’t great – he was more concerned on hitting on the girl he actually wanted to go with (we were there as friends so I wasn’t super hurt but I was kinda miffed), but I had fun. I danced with my friends and the guy who became my first boyfriend a year later. It was fun going home with my date and aforementioned future first boyfriend to watch dumb action comedies at my house after.
Since LatAm imports all of y’all’s culture, but also, we don’t have our drinking age set at 21, schools have been making proms/galas for the last two decades. They can get elaborate. They also usually have an open bar.
Luckily, kiddos don’t usually drive their own cars so this recipe results in a bunch of (sharp-dressed) teenagers getting drunk and partying until really late… With their parents picking them up at the end.
I went to prom with friends, had fun. It’s when you elevate it to being the most consequential romantic moment of your life (something that’s very easy to do when you’re that age) that you run into problems.
My table at the prom dinner was super awkward. My date n I hate just broken up n he had recently cheated on me. Another girls date stood her up. It was a very emotional table
. Then I got very high on too much ecstacy but tried to play it off like I was sober so I drank every full pitcher of water the waiter brought to the table n chewed my face off with bubble gum lmao… It was the only way I could dance cause my dance was an ass n convinced me I had no rhythm n I had to get high to be able to dance in front of my classmates whooo
I remember my prom being fun! There was some fun music and dancing, and me and my friends ate a ridiculous amount of candy. I have no idea who was elected prom king & queen, because most of my friend circle was entirely indifferent to the matter. I’m fairly certain that a significant portion of the student body at large cared, though, and I respect that! Archaic rituals slash popularity contests can be genuinely enjoyable for some people, I’m sure!
I don’t entirely disagree with Malaya about it being kind of dorky, though.
The coolest thing of all would be to eat Malaya out. She’s beautiful, and she’s the kind of arrogant, over-bearing asshole who could put a submissive like me in his place.
Like Joyce, I was homeschooled. Some groups did “homeschool prom.” One of the moms in our group suggested it. Nobody bothered to reply to her email except me, and I suggested we have a Euchre tournament or a flag football game instead. Nobody ever said a word about it again. I don’t think any of us highschoolers in the group cared. It really wouldn’t have fit the vibe of our friend group.
I regret going (Aus version is formal). Didn’t want to go, got bribed, spent half the night reading in a different room until teachers found me and sent me back. Had a panic attack, got picked up early. Pretty much par for my course.
Best part of the night was when a guy made some remark (suggesting I blow him or something) and I dumped my drink on his rented suit. Felt bad ass for two minutes.
Best part of our prom was the insane free all-night party that the town threw for all attendees, in an effort to keep kids from leaving for a drinking afterparty.
Bouncy castles, unlimited food/candy/soft drinks, often a band or other entertainer. Prizes at the very end (5am-ish) if you stayed the whole time. I won an XBox 360 one year. One time they just handed out $50 cash to everyone on the way out.
also seems liek a waste of money. other than a safe supervised place to dress up or so , or being into that prom queen stuff, feels like it’d be better to hang outwith a group of friends at hte movies on the weekends
I loved going to my prom. Theme was Phantom of the Opera, I got to wear a tux with tails, I cut my hair two hours prior from ass-length to this really cute short thing with all these curls on top. After-prom was held at a local pool with hot rubs and saunas, and after that, my friends and our dates went to one friend’s house and watched LA story and crashes til some time in the afternoon the next day. This was also back in the olden days of 1992, so things were definitely different.
Other details, my date looked amazing, but she did cry my hair, dinner was at a fantastic restaurant rhat has long since closed, and no one recognized me because of my haircut.
Prom was imported to this country about ten years after I left school, and I have always been grateful it wasn’t sooner.
(“School disco” isn’t the same thing, even slightly. Although it also wasn’t much fun, at least once I realised I couldn’t breakdance, and the crowd that had gathered around me knew it. And those off-brand 200ml bottles of cola and iron brew that you never saw anywhere except school events, and which never tasted quite right.)
I couldn’t afford it even if I’d wanted to go (which I didn’t). My boyfriend (now husband) and I spent the weekend trying all the ice cream places in like a 45 min radius instead (wayyy less expensive).
agree. I may be biased because mine was uhhh more than 12 hours long (starting at like 4pm) and I got the hell out at about 6am. They wanted us to stay until like noon and I had to argue with the PTA to get out of there.
I spent a bunch my of time at prom batting balloons around. A few other kids joined in.
Also dropped a whole bunch of song requests. Some because they were good songs, others just for the lolz. One of them was Never Gonna Give You Up, I just rickrolled everycreature irl at prom because I could.
Music was freaking LOUD, couldn’t have much conversation outside of that one stretch of time set aside for eating (didn’t eat anything because I’m the pickiest eater on the planet and they didn’t have anything I liked). At one point to take a break from the sensory overload I shut myself in the bathroom for a minute and sang to myself in there. Bathrooms really do have the BEST acoustics btw.
Also there was like, no air conditioning, had to have my rainbow-sequin jacket tied around my waist half the night because I was sweating like crazy. Oh yeah, other things I was wearing included purple glitter sneakers (which were slightly small and too stiff so half the time I just danced around shoeless) and a plastic mask that looked like Pinkie Pie’s face (which went flying off every time I twirled). I was serving kind of a look imo.
Oh, also at one point I did a “dance move” that consisted of dropping on the floor on my back and waggling my arms and legs in the air.
I liked prom. Well. I like getting to wear pretty gowns. And the only reliable opportunities for that are prom and my wedding, with few in between.
I also got to spend the day getting ready with one of my best friends, and our other best friend who moved away the year before flew out to see us and came as her date. So yeah, pretty good night.
I was also made prom queen in the class gc? Which was weird bc that’s not really a thing here? So if was just a weird way to make fun of me ig
Hey now, Malaya totally COULD hang out with other people! They’ve just DECIDED, on their own, not to grant other people that privilege. You know, because she’s COOL.
she doesn’t seem to be as needy for attention as carla, and has fuck face so i imagine she’s cool with being a ‘loner’ but not in a ‘posing lone wolf’ way lol
or randomly hooking up with ppl like she did with joe one time
Malaya does have Fuckface as another roommate, which inherently cool but only if Fuckface has choosen to be present otherwise MMalayais just another dork who went to White Castle, Although to be fair everyone is a dork when compared to Fuckface.
If we need another “Mike death” to move along the story, I volunteer Malaya to be the sacrifice. Hell even if we don’t necessarily need her death, I volunteer her for it anyway.
Honestly I hated Malaya for the longest time but now that Sal is slightly less vulnerable to Malaya’s needling, I’m actually enjoying their new dynamic. It was pretty grating for awhile there but it’s become almost playful or tongue in cheek, which makes it more bearable.
Also, Malaya in this instance is mostly being inflicted on Jennifer, who I haven’t ever really vibed with and I always enjoy seeing people no-sell her “prom queen” shtick.
…wait, hold. Even more than Linda? Or Mary? I get people not liking Malaya (my joking aside), but surely the “#1 most hated cast member” spot should go to someone more ACTIVELY villainous!
No White Castle is kind of awful as far as fast food burger restaurants I’d probably place Wendy’s at the top (five guys is semi fast food and as much as I want to try in and out they don’t have a presence om the East Coast of the United States) and if I inadvertently started a which fast food burger place is best conversation… ok your place is probably better I just likely haven’t tried it.
there ain’t one nearby where I am LOL, but when you got the munchies and the frozen kind are literally less than a mile away at a convenience store, well, good enough XD
I was in Cali a few years ago. I wasn’t impressed with In and Out. Burger King is better. I agree that Wendy’s is the best. The actual all-beef beef is excellent. What’s more excellent is that I just found out, after four years, that I’m near a Wendy’s. Good-bye, Burger King.
don’t think i’ve had it ‘fresh’ , we have had frozen mini ones and they tasted abit weird, then again i live in the south so easier to find like one local burger place that’s alright quality as well as multiple taco places
I knew Jennifer would pull the “HEAD CHEERLEADER, PROM QUEEN” card sdgjsl. ANYWAY. We, uh. We know how that one ended. Some get eaten out at parking lots, others get black-out drunk behind the wheel, neither of them was cool that night.
PS: Poor Sal, you just know a part of her soul DIED when she pronounced The Words.
Oh god, yes. Please. Malaya needs to be humbled even more than Jennifer, what an absolute sinkhole of a person. Every time they appear onscreen I’m like “NOW SAY SOMETHING BEAUTIFUL AND TRUE, GO ON, I DARE YOU.”
Oof. I went looking for hard proof but my brain isn’t cooperating TwT We do know that it was the last time Jennifer saw her ex-bbf/fwb Alice before college, though, and that they spent the entire summer apart. So it was at the very least right by the end of her senior year.
I’m sure it was near the end of the year, but when I picture the panel in my mind of the crash, I don’t remember a prom dress.
Also, I don’t think Jennifer was as open with dating her former bestie as she was with Ruth, which was why I assumed she went to prom with a guy.
I’m feeling too lazy to verify said assumptions, so I’m glad one of us took the time to look.
Malaya is ENTIRELY correct. Being somebody who cares about being prom queen or head cheerleader as anything even approximating an adult is the most immature, dork shit.
I’m really holding out for Jennifer to actually learn, one of these days, that high school is over and that not a single thing that happened in high school mattered even a little bit.
The only things about high school that carry into your adult life are:
– Probably less than half of whatever you studied in class.
– A bunch of vague acquaintances and maybe a few friends.
– Trauma.
I’d say ‘life experiences’ but you get life experiences just by living, and being alive through the ages of 13-18 is not the same as high school.
I respectfully disagree. Whatever people are passionate about is cool to them. Being prom queen clearly matters to Jen and was a formative moment for her. What makes her a “dork” if that’s the term we’re going with is thinking that makes her superior to someone who doesn’t value that status or superior to anyone really. Same with being a head cheerleader which could even be a career. Jennifer has some major personality flaws but valuing her high school experience isn’t inherently wrong.
I think that Jennifer uses her high school status exploits as a replacement for an actual public identity a little too often for her own good, but on the whole, yeah, I’m with you.
Malaya just seems like the sort of asshole that sneers at people for caring about *anything*. She feels kinda like a nihilist, but not in the positive “it doesn’t cosmically matter but fuck it we’re still here” sense, or in the interesting-but-negative “we’re all doomed woe unto us all” sense, just a bland “caring about things is for losers” teenage edgelord crap.
She is only clinging to Prom Queen and Cheerleader because she thinks they’re objectively cool. Not because she has them as important to her subjectively.
Malaya is just running on vibes, like she usually does, which means that because Jennifer cares about it too much, that means she’s a dork because she cares about things too much.
Why I like Malaya isn’t because she’s a fun character but because she correctly identifies the ways people around her self-identify according to stupid bullshit that doesn’t matter…it’s just that *that also applies to Malaya* because identifying yourself as above everything else is her one thing.
She’s pretty right a lot of the time actually! Sal doesn’t need to be so rebellious she’s just in automatic mode when it comes to people, and the proof is watching her bump into Wonderbread and not know what to do with herself. Her glaring flaw is an inability to look in the mirror.
Yeah, there’s this weird take on Jennifer that it’s somehow weird she didn’t instantly drop all of her high school status stuff the moment college started. It was last year. Stuff you did last year can still matter to you. That’s okay.
Hell people were complaining about it when it was still first semester and only a few months back.
I don’t think Jennifer caring about prom or cheerleading is bad or cringe in itself. But the way she thinks those things should automatically give her Status and make everyone respect her, isn’t cool. I mean, that’s not really what happened here, Malaya insulted her first, but just in general that’s how Jennifer tends to talk about high school.
@Daibhid C
I think that part of the trouble is that words like ‘dork’ and ‘nerd’ don’t really mean anything, so people use them differently.
To some people, they’re just a pejorative. Basically another word for ‘jerk’.
To others, like Jennifer, they represent a specific set of interests (science fiction, fantasy, comics, technology). If she doesn’t (openly) like those things, then she can’t be a ‘dork’.
To others, they mean a deep interest in ANY specific topic – sports nerds for example.
I vaguely get the impression that Malaya subscribes to that last one – and thus Jennifer is a ‘cheerleader dork’ or maybe a ‘highschool dork’.
On the other hand, Malaya might also be using the first option and just calling everyone jerks all the time. It’s hard to tell with them.
I think Malaya is using the first one, and the comment section seems to be following suit, which makes sense since we’re commenting on their conversation. Malaya kind of just generically insults everyone. There’s a bit of your last definition in their insults, but with the caveat that they think caring at all about anything can be viewed with contempt, it doesn’t even require a deep level of interest, and also Malaya can just make up reasons.
In terms of memories I’d just as soon forget, I think “getting eaten out in a White Castle parking lot” ranks right up there with “getting a hummer in a heavily-used portapotty at a weekend music festival”.
Getting eaten out isn’t impressive, lots of people have sex.
In a parking lot? That’s just depressing. Parking lots are depressing. They’re the ugliest environment beyond the inside of butcher shops, strip mines, and the inside of a small percentage of factories. It is one of the least cool places to get eaten out. Try on top of a table mountain, a secluded valley, overlooking a river, under a waterfall, the top of a skyscraper.
I actually think it’s pretty cool by high school standards. Most people would be having sex in their cars at that age, so that’s not unusual. Just having sex wouldn’t be that impressive, but getting eaten out is a flex. At that age everyone is still very self-conscious and hung up on gender norms. A guy doing something specifically to give his partner pleasure is a bit transgressive. It makes me think Malaya must have been very confident and held a lot of the power in that situation.
Only if the person eating her out was even roughly the same age, though. Of course in my neck of the woods the kids don’t have cars at that age, so for me car sex sounds less like a flex and more … transactional..
Well, it’s the same age a drunken Jennifer wrapped her car around a telephone pole (with her not-a-girlfriend with her), so assuming it couldn’t have been her car seems to be a you problem.
And getting eaten out in a parking lot is definitely cooler than Jennifer’s car story.
Yup. Going to prom is at least “going to school and participating in school activities” thing but having sex in a car in a parking lot instead sounds .. well, the wrong sort of “cool”.
I disagree with both, and point out, that the person agreeing with parking-lot-sex-cool is the person who already got a ride a police car lockbox.
Yep. Called that motherfucker. Whipped out the (EX-, bongo) Cheerleader Card like a Platinum AMEX at Tiffany & Co.
I didn’t get to go to prom, as I lived in a Jesus Nazi household. Whi is a bit rich, as Mom was this hippie chick throughout my childhood. Until I was old enough to wanna get out and party; then suddenly NOOP we’re gonna be all churchy now thankyouverymuch. Christ, childhood sucked.
Malaya is a shit stirrer, but I too would stir the shit of someone who pulls out their highschool extracurricular activities to vehemently oppose being called a dork by someone who is so inconsequential.
Expecting strangers care about what you did in highschool is incredibly dorky
Iunno, I think being fresh outta highschool is just about the only time to have “peaked in highschool” energy and it not be kinda sad. She’s being kinda sad but like… That was last year for her.
Yeah, the change is something people are told about in all cases but it never prepares them for the reality, no matter what social status they had (or imagined).
Oh that was not my prom date. I did bring a real someone, but also a fake someone. Also, the automatic pilot would have been a step up, if you can believe it. I never knew these things looked so creepy IRL.
In Malaya’s head, absolutely not Malaya. When they says stuff like this, they’re being real, it’s everyone else who’s performative.
Man, I’ve just realised I really want to see Booster do their thing on Malaya. (I’ve checked the tags, and while Malaya was at the floor meeting where Booster first started doing their thing, they didn’t attract their attention.)
She’s maybe in a Holden Caulfield phase.
On the other hand, she’s probably just calling whomever shows up a dork, with no greater meaning or judgment. It got a little rise out of Jennifer, so she rolled with it because she’s being a mostly harmless contrarian.
The high school I went to didn’t have proms. If they had, only, at most, a handful of people would have shown up, and they’d have gone down in school history as the school dorks. (I’m not saying I would have agreed with that, but that’s what would have happened.)
…Oh no Jennifer thinks there’s a universally accepted measure of Social Success. Like how she thinks being confident means going OBVIOUSLY I’M CONFIDENT. Oh honey.
Obligatory comment to say that I don’t get the “prom queen” thing. High school is already too competitive/not supportive or inclusive enough. I don’t understand why American high schools would add to that with what is basically an in-school popularity contest.
Because suffering builds character, and competition is necessary to separate out the deserving elites from the common filth! It’s a great, historic, part of our national character. Plus, it helps fill the gap in our cultural psyche left behind by the British monarchy. All good things, all around.
Yeah, I don’t really get it either. My school didn’t have a Prom King and Queen, but we did have Homecoming King, Queen, and Court, and it really is weird when you think about it. I didn’t mind it at the time because the girl who was Homecoming Queen my senior year was also really nice– got the senior class superlative* for “nicest girl” at the end of the year– and super involved in school government, worked hard in the calculus class I had with her, so I didn’t feel like it was some… idk, Queen Bee shit. But it’s a weird thing to have in general.
I mean she basically has the same role as him. I could also suggest Rachel but it wouldn’t leave as much an impact because nobody gives a shit about her.
Strips like this make me believe more and more that Sal and Malaya will end up being friends forever and that even at eighty Sal will end up saying “Goddammit, Malaya!” every time they talk.
I like Jennifer and Malaya but I am very much enjoying Jennifer getting put in her place re: high school shit. It’s fine to value your good times but cmon Jen you’re in college now NOBODY CARES.
Now that I think of it how has Jennifer held onto this belief so long? I guess she retains her ability to socially network so she thinks she’s still “popular” but… idk I feel like most of the folks I met were over that shit on like day 1 of college classes.
I suspect most of the people you knew in college weren’t actually popular in high school. That was my circle and we were definitely over it by college – but we’d never really had it.
Of course, Jennifer’s clinging to it because it’s all she has. She’s got no emotional support from her parents and basically never has. She lost her best friend/unacknowledged girlfriend over the DUI that was part of that life.
God, I really hope this doesn’t lead in to Jennifer deciding not to help Sal with her actual problems because she felt disrespected. But. Like. It’s Jennifer. So. That’s very possible.
Jennifer’s takeaway from this arc is definitely going to be “other people don’t understand me”.
as a veritable nerd, I will say that both getting eaten out and eating out, regardless of locale, sound like a much better way to spend prom night than attending prom itself does
of course, I ended up taking the much more bland “play video games at home” option
Malaya’s argument seems fallacious to me. If Sal disagreed just because she doesn’t want to face the fact that Malaya’s right, why is she agreeing with them now??
Malaya’s argument is that Jennifer is not remotely “cool” trying to tout stuff from high cool in college. Sal, who is the embodiment of cool and okay with dorks, is trying to give Jennifer some helpful advice.
“getting eaten out in a white castle parking lot”
wish i had stories like that. just some crazy sh%$ that i can just pull out at random.
for me, highschool was all panic attacks, mental health issues, parents getting divorced, and losing my home. it’d be nice to have fun stories like that one.
“oh, i was too busy getting my b&@@y Bounded by a friend in a wendy’s bathroom; it was chill.”
today in #9chickweedlane i learned we have to be shown children learning and relearning what sex is, for Reasons, even though they already clearly know and have prepared nuanced questions about it!
also that Gran must hate, if she's still alive, how Old Juliette is the same but with gray hair
one of my favorite things is when a commenter explodes WHEN DO THESE CHARACTERS GET THERAPY but directed towards a character who canonically has a regular therapist
Hot Toys Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith 1/6 Scale Darth Vader Deluxe ($495) & Standard ($315) is up for preorder at Sideshow - shrsl.com/4wcx6 #ad
If you preorder make sure to hit the Exclusive versions since they include a commemorative plaque and cost the same.
btw if you're one of those rando bluesky weirdos who doesn't know me but sees me in the wild being sarcastic and don't know i'm being sarcastic because you haven't taken like 30 seconds to, like, maybe look at my user profile or something, keep walking, you're not going to score internet points here
Here's an entertaining cite at the bottom of the first page
Josh Gerstein@joshgerstein.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
JUST IN: Milwaukee Judge Hannah Dugan moves to dismiss federal criminal case against her for allegedly helping immigrant hide from ICE. Her lawyers say she's protected by official acts & judicial immunity and 10th Amendment. Doc: storage.courtlistener.com/recap/gov.us...
Where did Hollywood go so wrong? I thought movies were supposed to be an escape from reality, a chance to put your worries aside and not have to think about any underlying ideas or concepts. Well, not anymore.
theonion.com/you-can...
It's not a new argument, of course, but Chesterton dismissed it effectively in 1908.
"You will hear everlastingly... this argument that the rich man cannot be bribed. The fact is, of course, that the rich man is bribed; he has been bribed already. That is why he is a rich man."
Aaron Rupar@atrupar.com ⋅ 2d
Hawley dismisses Trump lining his pockets with his memecoin: "Listen, I think nobody believes that Donald Trump can be bought. I mean, what does Donald Trump need more money for?"
wilbur, savvy enough to know he's in a comic strip but still not a great actor, awkwardly lifts a muffin up into frame so that we, the audience, understand that he has a muffin right now, which is very important narratively, but he's not really selling it well as an organic, human action
preternia @preternia.com ⋅ 1d
Josh Gerstein @joshgerstein.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
Aaron Rupar @atrupar.com ⋅ 2d
Pavel
@spavel.bsky.social ⋅ 11d
Loading ...
*plays “Super Freak” by Rick James on hacked muzak*
Wait, where is Ana? Have they been kidnapped or something?
Is it Prom season again already?!
Anything you could be doing that isn’t attending prom is better than being the bigshot at prom. Prom sucks ass.
I think prom as a concept was only a big deal in movies. I remember my prom which was over a decade ago mind you, being really boring. I remember drinking lots of free soda then me and my two friends and a small group of others went bowling at the local arcade after like 20 minutes there.
Glad to know I’m not the only one here who skipped it and has no real regrets over doing so.
I remember dressing up for Prom was fun.
I also remember not having a date, showing up alone, meeting friends there, dancing in a vague group… and that’s about it.
In retrospect, getting eaten out woulda been way more fun. Point Malaya.
I remember NOT dressing up for prom was fun. Ripped jeans, t-shirt, and not giving a fuck was actually more fun than I’d expected. I was going to skip it until my mother forbade me from going because it would embarrass my sister, who was in junior high and had been invited to the prom by her idiot boyfriend. That didn’t work out well for her, I was 18 and had my own car.
The after party was at a friend’s house, there was drinking and watching movies. I don’t think there was any sex that night, might have been, hard to remember 35 years later.
See, after parties were apparently where it was at.
I did not have any after party invitations.
It did not help, I think, that Freshman year, I ended up as part of an upper classman friend group. My school had strict rules that only Juniors and Seniors could go to prom, so the years that fun things could have happened, I couldn’t go. And then when it was my turn, all my best friends had graduated already.
I had fun at my prom. I went as the Masque of the Red Death, made my own mask and everything. Inexplicably, I was the only one there who chose that theme (small class of like 125, but it still felt like an obvious choice for a masquerade).
That sounds amazing tho, I love the idea OwO!!
Not gonna lie, that does sound pretty fuckin sweet.
Actually, I did something a little similar. While I couldn’t quite get away with actual historic cosplay, I went with the most Victorian-looking dress I could find.
There was, prehaps, more than one reason I did not have a date. ^^;;
If I’d known someone was going to my prom in the most victorian dress they could find I’d have worn a frock coat and top hat and gone with them instead of staying home and… well, I don’t remember what I did that night, or what night it was, being mumblety-mumble years ago.
YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Eh, prom was fun for what it was – a night to get dressed up super fancy, hang out with your friends and go ‘thank fuck we’re almost done high school’. If that’s not your thing then yeah it’s not that big a deal. One of my friends didn’t go and she seemed totally fine with that, though we missed hanging out with her that night.
My date wasn’t great – he was more concerned on hitting on the girl he actually wanted to go with (we were there as friends so I wasn’t super hurt but I was kinda miffed), but I had fun. I danced with my friends and the guy who became my first boyfriend a year later. It was fun going home with my date and aforementioned future first boyfriend to watch dumb action comedies at my house after.
I never went to prom. by then my limbs had swollen to almost twice their size, so instead I was in the wheel-chair tripping on medical marijuana.
in retrospect i probably wouldn’t have liked prom anyway. seems too bourgeois honestly
Since LatAm imports all of y’all’s culture, but also, we don’t have our drinking age set at 21, schools have been making proms/galas for the last two decades. They can get elaborate. They also usually have an open bar.
Luckily, kiddos don’t usually drive their own cars so this recipe results in a bunch of (sharp-dressed) teenagers getting drunk and partying until really late… With their parents picking them up at the end.
Ah, someone else who understands the basic idea of “old enough to be a soldier, old enough to get wasted”
I went to prom with friends, had fun. It’s when you elevate it to being the most consequential romantic moment of your life (something that’s very easy to do when you’re that age) that you run into problems.
My table at the prom dinner was super awkward. My date n I hate just broken up n he had recently cheated on me. Another girls date stood her up. It was a very emotional table
. Then I got very high on too much ecstacy but tried to play it off like I was sober so I drank every full pitcher of water the waiter brought to the table n chewed my face off with bubble gum lmao… It was the only way I could dance cause my dance was an ass n convinced me I had no rhythm n I had to get high to be able to dance in front of my classmates whooo
I remember my prom being fun! There was some fun music and dancing, and me and my friends ate a ridiculous amount of candy. I have no idea who was elected prom king & queen, because most of my friend circle was entirely indifferent to the matter. I’m fairly certain that a significant portion of the student body at large cared, though, and I respect that! Archaic rituals slash popularity contests can be genuinely enjoyable for some people, I’m sure!
I don’t entirely disagree with Malaya about it being kind of dorky, though.
The coolest thing of all would be to eat Malaya out. She’s beautiful, and she’s the kind of arrogant, over-bearing asshole who could put a submissive like me in his place.
Carla avatar seems rather into it
AU allosexual (or at least, sex-positive) Carla is mildly terrifying to me
There was that brief weird thing where Carla was talking about getting Malaya to step on her, so this kind of tracks?
Oh yeah, I actually forgot about that. Fair enough!
Imagining her talking enthusiastically about eating someone out is still weird, though.
Like Joyce, I was homeschooled. Some groups did “homeschool prom.” One of the moms in our group suggested it. Nobody bothered to reply to her email except me, and I suggested we have a Euchre tournament or a flag football game instead. Nobody ever said a word about it again. I don’t think any of us highschoolers in the group cared. It really wouldn’t have fit the vibe of our friend group.
I regret going (Aus version is formal). Didn’t want to go, got bribed, spent half the night reading in a different room until teachers found me and sent me back. Had a panic attack, got picked up early. Pretty much par for my course.
Best part of the night was when a guy made some remark (suggesting I blow him or something) and I dumped my drink on his rented suit. Felt bad ass for two minutes.
Best part of our prom was the insane free all-night party that the town threw for all attendees, in an effort to keep kids from leaving for a drinking afterparty.
Bouncy castles, unlimited food/candy/soft drinks, often a band or other entertainer. Prizes at the very end (5am-ish) if you stayed the whole time. I won an XBox 360 one year. One time they just handed out $50 cash to everyone on the way out.
also seems liek a waste of money. other than a safe supervised place to dress up or so , or being into that prom queen stuff, feels like it’d be better to hang outwith a group of friends at hte movies on the weekends
I loved going to my prom. Theme was Phantom of the Opera, I got to wear a tux with tails, I cut my hair two hours prior from ass-length to this really cute short thing with all these curls on top. After-prom was held at a local pool with hot rubs and saunas, and after that, my friends and our dates went to one friend’s house and watched LA story and crashes til some time in the afternoon the next day. This was also back in the olden days of 1992, so things were definitely different.
Other details, my date looked amazing, but she did cry my hair, dinner was at a fantastic restaurant rhat has long since closed, and no one recognized me because of my haircut.
:O tail coat! Im jealous, that awesome
Prom was imported to this country about ten years after I left school, and I have always been grateful it wasn’t sooner.
(“School disco” isn’t the same thing, even slightly. Although it also wasn’t much fun, at least once I realised I couldn’t breakdance, and the crowd that had gathered around me knew it. And those off-brand 200ml bottles of cola and iron brew that you never saw anywhere except school events, and which never tasted quite right.)
I couldn’t afford it even if I’d wanted to go (which I didn’t). My boyfriend (now husband) and I spent the weekend trying all the ice cream places in like a 45 min radius instead (wayyy less expensive).
agree. I may be biased because mine was uhhh more than 12 hours long (starting at like 4pm) and I got the hell out at about 6am. They wanted us to stay until like noon and I had to argue with the PTA to get out of there.
W H A T ??????????????????
I went to prom solo and got to eat a bunch of cookies, so it was a decent experience.
I spent a bunch my of time at prom batting balloons around. A few other kids joined in.
Also dropped a whole bunch of song requests. Some because they were good songs, others just for the lolz. One of them was Never Gonna Give You Up, I just rickrolled everycreature irl at prom because I could.
Music was freaking LOUD, couldn’t have much conversation outside of that one stretch of time set aside for eating (didn’t eat anything because I’m the pickiest eater on the planet and they didn’t have anything I liked). At one point to take a break from the sensory overload I shut myself in the bathroom for a minute and sang to myself in there. Bathrooms really do have the BEST acoustics btw.
Also there was like, no air conditioning, had to have my rainbow-sequin jacket tied around my waist half the night because I was sweating like crazy. Oh yeah, other things I was wearing included purple glitter sneakers (which were slightly small and too stiff so half the time I just danced around shoeless) and a plastic mask that looked like Pinkie Pie’s face (which went flying off every time I twirled). I was serving kind of a look imo.
Oh, also at one point I did a “dance move” that consisted of dropping on the floor on my back and waggling my arms and legs in the air.
I liked prom. Well. I like getting to wear pretty gowns. And the only reliable opportunities for that are prom and my wedding, with few in between.
I also got to spend the day getting ready with one of my best friends, and our other best friend who moved away the year before flew out to see us and came as her date. So yeah, pretty good night.
I was also made prom queen in the class gc? Which was weird bc that’s not really a thing here? So if was just a weird way to make fun of me ig
Haven’t we established by now coolness is subjective? Who cares about who was getting eaten out where or who was cheerleader when?
I guess I would say 7 to 8 degrees Celsius is cool which about 44.6 to 46.4 Fahrenheit but your right coolness is subjective.
I live in Forida. 74 F is cool to me. At 70, I break out my long johns.
When you die, they add up all your cool points to decide if you can get in to cool heaven.
Jennifer absolutely does not believe that.
To the first question: not in comic, and not for these two, no.
To the second: Malaya and Jennifer, respectively (and exclusively).
Rooming with Jennifer and then Malaya, I’m surprised Sal hasn’t turned to murder yet.
Maybe if her next roommate is Mary that will be the tipping point.
Why would you wish such terrible fate on someone? There are circles of hell better than that.
The only person I’d sic Mary on is Malaya. The only person I’d wish on Malaya is Mary.
THIS would be a perfect roommate arrangement. And the resulting Sal and Roz sounds full of possibilities.
Problem; Malaya had a pet that’s against dorm rules and Mary is a snitch
I would not wish Mary on Malaya. Mary would absolutely snitch on the lizard while constantly misgendering them. Malaya is just kind of cantankerous.
I’d ask why Malaya doesn’t have other people to hang out with, but that is a question that answers itself.
Hey now, Malaya totally COULD hang out with other people! They’ve just DECIDED, on their own, not to grant other people that privilege. You know, because she’s COOL.
she doesn’t seem to be as needy for attention as carla, and has fuck face so i imagine she’s cool with being a ‘loner’ but not in a ‘posing lone wolf’ way lol
or randomly hooking up with ppl like she did with joe one time
Well, she is an relationship with Marcie and go to the roller derbies thing.
She’s a loner who doesn’t need people, but in a less try hard way than Sal (ie the exact same)
Malaya does have Fuckface as another roommate, which inherently cool but only if Fuckface has choosen to be present otherwise MMalayais just another dork who went to White Castle, Although to be fair everyone is a dork when compared to Fuckface.
Dumbing of Age Gets Eaten Out in a White Castle Parking Lot
I’d buy it.
Take that, Garfield At Large!
Ya had to ruin the moment, eh Malaya? XD
I think if Malaya actually thought she was having a moment with Sal, she would either implode due to hatred, or explode from intolerance of others.
Malaya is a reflexive contrarian so if she has a moment, she must ruin it. It’s the way of the Malaya.
If we need another “Mike death” to move along the story, I volunteer Malaya to be the sacrifice. Hell even if we don’t necessarily need her death, I volunteer her for it anyway.
I fucking detest Malaya; was that not clear?
+1 the less Malaya the better
-1 Malaya, like Carla, is perfect and can do no wrong
As far as depth goes she’s the flattest character we’ve had in the series and that is a hell of an accomplishment when Faz exists
It’s the binder isn’t it.
It is. It is the binder.
I think you are thinking of Mary.
Honestly I hated Malaya for the longest time but now that Sal is slightly less vulnerable to Malaya’s needling, I’m actually enjoying their new dynamic. It was pretty grating for awhile there but it’s become almost playful or tongue in cheek, which makes it more bearable.
Also, Malaya in this instance is mostly being inflicted on Jennifer, who I haven’t ever really vibed with and I always enjoy seeing people no-sell her “prom queen” shtick.
I don’t wish death on them, but out of all the cast if someone died in a fire I would be the least upset if it were Malaya.
…wait, hold. Even more than Linda? Or Mary? I get people not liking Malaya (my joking aside), but surely the “#1 most hated cast member” spot should go to someone more ACTIVELY villainous!
I think they mean out of the main cast.
To be fair, Jennifer would have been doing the same, if not for that tree.
What’d the tree ever do to her?
It’s true trees don’t eat out; like Batman they are selfish lovers.
Trees spray pollen over the entire countryside just in case someone is interested in it, how can that be selfish?
I don’t think this is what “having Nibblers in White Castle” normally means.
Hold up, by association, does that mean cheerleaders are dorks too?! Brrr.
Is anyone else here getting a sudden craving for White Castle?
No White Castle is kind of awful as far as fast food burger restaurants I’d probably place Wendy’s at the top (five guys is semi fast food and as much as I want to try in and out they don’t have a presence om the East Coast of the United States) and if I inadvertently started a which fast food burger place is best conversation… ok your place is probably better I just likely haven’t tried it.
there ain’t one nearby where I am LOL, but when you got the munchies and the frozen kind are literally less than a mile away at a convenience store, well, good enough XD
I’ve never actually tried the frozen ones I see then in freezers in my local supermarket.
not bad when you add mustard and caramelized onions :9
Harold and Kumar respectfully disagree.
I was in Cali a few years ago. I wasn’t impressed with In and Out. Burger King is better. I agree that Wendy’s is the best. The actual all-beef beef is excellent. What’s more excellent is that I just found out, after four years, that I’m near a Wendy’s. Good-bye, Burger King.
Wendy’s is the best after Whataburger.
Burgers by Gormet (aka Gormyburgers) used to be the best back when they were a thing.
Wendy’s is great, but it’s clear that you don’t have a Steak’n’Shake in your area.
don’t think i’ve had it ‘fresh’ , we have had frozen mini ones and they tasted abit weird, then again i live in the south so easier to find like one local burger place that’s alright quality as well as multiple taco places
Indiana has Culvers now. The other fast food places can close. Frozen custard.
I knew Jennifer would pull the “HEAD CHEERLEADER, PROM QUEEN” card sdgjsl. ANYWAY. We, uh. We know how that one ended. Some get eaten out at parking lots, others get black-out drunk behind the wheel, neither of them was cool that night.
PS: Poor Sal, you just know a part of her soul DIED when she pronounced The Words.
It has to come, at some point the golden time could arrive where finally, finally, Sal can beat her, believe me, I hope for that.
And Jennifer….no need to explain
Oh god, yes. Please. Malaya needs to be humbled even more than Jennifer, what an absolute sinkhole of a person. Every time they appear onscreen I’m like “NOW SAY SOMETHING BEAUTIFUL AND TRUE, GO ON, I DARE YOU.”
Did the crash happen on prom night?
I thought it was a regular day.
Oof. I went looking for hard proof but my brain isn’t cooperating TwT We do know that it was the last time Jennifer saw her ex-bbf/fwb Alice before college, though, and that they spent the entire summer apart. So it was at the very least right by the end of her senior year.
I’m sure it was near the end of the year, but when I picture the panel in my mind of the crash, I don’t remember a prom dress.
Also, I don’t think Jennifer was as open with dating her former bestie as she was with Ruth, which was why I assumed she went to prom with a guy.
I’m feeling too lazy to verify said assumptions, so I’m glad one of us took the time to look.
It wasn’t prom, that I recall.
Malaya is ENTIRELY correct. Being somebody who cares about being prom queen or head cheerleader as anything even approximating an adult is the most immature, dork shit.
I’m really holding out for Jennifer to actually learn, one of these days, that high school is over and that not a single thing that happened in high school mattered even a little bit.
The only things about high school that carry into your adult life are:
– Probably less than half of whatever you studied in class.
– A bunch of vague acquaintances and maybe a few friends.
– Trauma.
I’d say ‘life experiences’ but you get life experiences just by living, and being alive through the ages of 13-18 is not the same as high school.
The detail is how strong, accurate and effective that blow of reality will have to be for her to finally wake up.
Of course, I forgot, who was the one who gave that blow?
I respectfully disagree. Whatever people are passionate about is cool to them. Being prom queen clearly matters to Jen and was a formative moment for her. What makes her a “dork” if that’s the term we’re going with is thinking that makes her superior to someone who doesn’t value that status or superior to anyone really. Same with being a head cheerleader which could even be a career. Jennifer has some major personality flaws but valuing her high school experience isn’t inherently wrong.
It happens that it is precisely her personality that completely opaques that aspect that should be seen in an honorable way.
I think that Jennifer uses her high school status exploits as a replacement for an actual public identity a little too often for her own good, but on the whole, yeah, I’m with you.
Malaya just seems like the sort of asshole that sneers at people for caring about *anything*. She feels kinda like a nihilist, but not in the positive “it doesn’t cosmically matter but fuck it we’re still here” sense, or in the interesting-but-negative “we’re all doomed woe unto us all” sense, just a bland “caring about things is for losers” teenage edgelord crap.
I mean Jennifer absolutely doesn’t believe that.
She is only clinging to Prom Queen and Cheerleader because she thinks they’re objectively cool. Not because she has them as important to her subjectively.
Malaya is just running on vibes, like she usually does, which means that because Jennifer cares about it too much, that means she’s a dork because she cares about things too much.
Why I like Malaya isn’t because she’s a fun character but because she correctly identifies the ways people around her self-identify according to stupid bullshit that doesn’t matter…it’s just that *that also applies to Malaya* because identifying yourself as above everything else is her one thing.
Malaya’s “Fake Detector” is usually wrong but got a hit here with Jennifer. Almost all of Jennifer’s present identity is performative.
She’s pretty right a lot of the time actually! Sal doesn’t need to be so rebellious she’s just in automatic mode when it comes to people, and the proof is watching her bump into Wonderbread and not know what to do with herself. Her glaring flaw is an inability to look in the mirror.
The diploma is mildly useful.
Have an upvote, I’m still trying to board up that haunted house. :/
This is what, February of their freshman year? Prom was all of ten months ago for her, that’s recent enough to still hold value.
Yeah, there’s this weird take on Jennifer that it’s somehow weird she didn’t instantly drop all of her high school status stuff the moment college started. It was last year. Stuff you did last year can still matter to you. That’s okay.
Hell people were complaining about it when it was still first semester and only a few months back.
Yeah, it’s January. It hasn’t even been a year yet. Prom’s usually, what, somewhere between April and June? Gotta give it at least a year, guys.
I don’t think Jennifer caring about prom or cheerleading is bad or cringe in itself. But the way she thinks those things should automatically give her Status and make everyone respect her, isn’t cool. I mean, that’s not really what happened here, Malaya insulted her first, but just in general that’s how Jennifer tends to talk about high school.
It’s definitely not cool. It’s kind of desperate in a way.
But it’s not that weird that she’s still got an attachment to it.
It’s the use of it as a status symbol that is what throws people.
“Hey, respect me, I was quarterback of my high school!”
It seems like you’re using “dork” as a general perjorative here, and speaking as a dork, I’m not cool with that. Or in general.
@Daibhid C
I think that part of the trouble is that words like ‘dork’ and ‘nerd’ don’t really mean anything, so people use them differently.
To some people, they’re just a pejorative. Basically another word for ‘jerk’.
To others, like Jennifer, they represent a specific set of interests (science fiction, fantasy, comics, technology). If she doesn’t (openly) like those things, then she can’t be a ‘dork’.
To others, they mean a deep interest in ANY specific topic – sports nerds for example.
I vaguely get the impression that Malaya subscribes to that last one – and thus Jennifer is a ‘cheerleader dork’ or maybe a ‘highschool dork’.
On the other hand, Malaya might also be using the first option and just calling everyone jerks all the time. It’s hard to tell with them.
I think Malaya is using the first one, and the comment section seems to be following suit, which makes sense since we’re commenting on their conversation. Malaya kind of just generically insults everyone. There’s a bit of your last definition in their insults, but with the caveat that they think caring at all about anything can be viewed with contempt, it doesn’t even require a deep level of interest, and also Malaya can just make up reasons.
That does sound much cooler than prom. Of course some people probably went to prom and did that afterwards.
worst-person-you-know.meme
In terms of memories I’d just as soon forget, I think “getting eaten out in a White Castle parking lot” ranks right up there with “getting a hummer in a heavily-used portapotty at a weekend music festival”.
Look, I’ve never even been close to a White Castle. And yet. The first thing my brain supplied was “hey, but the portapotty comes with a soundtrack”
Isn’t a hummer a type of car? That doesn’t fit!
Hummer can also be slang for a blow job.
Which is one of several reasons why that SUV name is hilarious.
Depends on how good the eating-out was.
The parking lot at least sounds like a less unpleasant location.
Ah yes, the ol’ “Woodstock Blumpkin”
she is and she should say it!
Getting eaten out isn’t impressive, lots of people have sex.
In a parking lot? That’s just depressing. Parking lots are depressing. They’re the ugliest environment beyond the inside of butcher shops, strip mines, and the inside of a small percentage of factories. It is one of the least cool places to get eaten out. Try on top of a table mountain, a secluded valley, overlooking a river, under a waterfall, the top of a skyscraper.
I actually think it’s pretty cool by high school standards. Most people would be having sex in their cars at that age, so that’s not unusual. Just having sex wouldn’t be that impressive, but getting eaten out is a flex. At that age everyone is still very self-conscious and hung up on gender norms. A guy doing something specifically to give his partner pleasure is a bit transgressive. It makes me think Malaya must have been very confident and held a lot of the power in that situation.
Only if the person eating her out was even roughly the same age, though. Of course in my neck of the woods the kids don’t have cars at that age, so for me car sex sounds less like a flex and more … transactional..
That’s a weird scenario you’ve invented in your head.
Super creative way to call a teenager a whore.
Well, it’s the same age a drunken Jennifer wrapped her car around a telephone pole (with her not-a-girlfriend with her), so assuming it couldn’t have been her car seems to be a you problem.
And getting eaten out in a parking lot is definitely cooler than Jennifer’s car story.
If someone paid Malaya to go down on them, that’s still a flex.
Who says it was a guy?
Malaya mostly seems interested in guys so far. Mostly I was trying to find a way to word it that didn’t call Malaya a girl.
Literally in a relationship with Marcie.
“Mostly”
“But what about exception to mostly, hm?”
They never said it was a guy who ate them out.
Yup. Going to prom is at least “going to school and participating in school activities” thing but having sex in a car in a parking lot instead sounds .. well, the wrong sort of “cool”.
I disagree with both, and point out, that the person agreeing with parking-lot-sex-cool is the person who already got a ride a police car lockbox.
what’s the “right kind of cool”? being a cop?
No, that’s being a tool. Similar words, very different meanings.
I mean was it fun? Did she like the other participant? Was it fun for them too?
Just saying.
Yep. Called that motherfucker. Whipped out the (EX-, bongo) Cheerleader Card like a Platinum AMEX at Tiffany & Co.
I didn’t get to go to prom, as I lived in a Jesus Nazi household. Whi is a bit rich, as Mom was this hippie chick throughout my childhood. Until I was old enough to wanna get out and party; then suddenly NOOP we’re gonna be all churchy now thankyouverymuch. Christ, childhood sucked.
Malaya is a shit stirrer, but I too would stir the shit of someone who pulls out their highschool extracurricular activities to vehemently oppose being called a dork by someone who is so inconsequential.
Expecting strangers care about what you did in highschool is incredibly dorky
I think it’s a tiny bit different when you and the stranger in question isn’t even a year out of high school yourselves.
You’re a little young for “peaked in high school” energy, Jennifer.
Iunno, I think being fresh outta highschool is just about the only time to have “peaked in highschool” energy and it not be kinda sad. She’s being kinda sad but like… That was last year for her.
Yeah, the change is something people are told about in all cases but it never prepares them for the reality, no matter what social status they had (or imagined).
I went to prom with a blow-up doll (I did dress it up in clothes before don’t worry). That was my crowning achievement really.
The better-known eaten out clown, of course, is the infamous Clown Ham. Which you “eat out” of your plate
See now I’m imagining your prom date looked like the automatic pilot from Airplane
Oh that was not my prom date. I did bring a real someone, but also a fake someone. Also, the automatic pilot would have been a step up, if you can believe it. I never knew these things looked so creepy IRL.
Being a cheerleader is definitely dork shit, you’re doing extra school to impress the grownups with your fancy gymnastics.
triangle smile fish!
this has nothing to do with this strip but
triangle smile fish!
Sacabambaspis had a triangle smile?!? That’s so cool!
“Malaya could now rest easy, knowing that, at long last, she had, essentially, broken Sal.”
The words Malaya is longing to hear from the narrator.
Ah, so that’s what she came for
Wow Malaya now who’s a performative rebel loner?
In Malaya’s head, absolutely not Malaya. When they says stuff like this, they’re being real, it’s everyone else who’s performative.
Man, I’ve just realised I really want to see Booster do their thing on Malaya. (I’ve checked the tags, and while Malaya was at the floor meeting where Booster first started doing their thing, they didn’t attract their attention.)
Performatively getting cleaned out to own the libs
She’s maybe in a Holden Caulfield phase.
On the other hand, she’s probably just calling whomever shows up a dork, with no greater meaning or judgment. It got a little rise out of Jennifer, so she rolled with it because she’s being a mostly harmless contrarian.
Alt. text <3 ^^
He’s going to get haunted by a ghost because of that alt text.
(IYKYK)
The high school I went to didn’t have proms. If they had, only, at most, a handful of people would have shown up, and they’d have gone down in school history as the school dorks. (I’m not saying I would have agreed with that, but that’s what would have happened.)
…Oh no Jennifer thinks there’s a universally accepted measure of Social Success. Like how she thinks being confident means going OBVIOUSLY I’M CONFIDENT. Oh honey.
Obligatory comment to say that I don’t get the “prom queen” thing. High school is already too competitive/not supportive or inclusive enough. I don’t understand why American high schools would add to that with what is basically an in-school popularity contest.
Because suffering builds character, and competition is necessary to separate out the deserving elites from the common filth! It’s a great, historic, part of our national character. Plus, it helps fill the gap in our cultural psyche left behind by the British monarchy. All good things, all around.
Yeah, I don’t really get it either. My school didn’t have a Prom King and Queen, but we did have Homecoming King, Queen, and Court, and it really is weird when you think about it. I didn’t mind it at the time because the girl who was Homecoming Queen my senior year was also really nice– got the senior class superlative* for “nicest girl” at the end of the year– and super involved in school government, worked hard in the calculus class I had with her, so I didn’t feel like it was some… idk, Queen Bee shit. But it’s a weird thing to have in general.
*also kind of a weird thing
I hope in the next AU Willis makes with these characters Malaya is the one to die instead of Mike.
Wow…that’s a little extreme. I would hate Malaya so much only if she caused Sal and Danny to break up.
I mean she basically has the same role as him. I could also suggest Rachel but it wouldn’t leave as much an impact because nobody gives a shit about her.
Congrats Ronna McDonna, I’m sure it was definitely the most satisfying experience of your life.
The highlight of Malaya’s high school experience was Billie’s Wednesday.
God I’ve never loved Malaya more than today. Please trash Jennifer some more. Destroy her entire ego.
But Jennifer, what have you done LATELY?
This is going to be the most electric, raunchiest hatefuck the world has ever seen
Strips like this make me believe more and more that Sal and Malaya will end up being friends forever and that even at eighty Sal will end up saying “Goddammit, Malaya!” every time they talk.
Frenemies 4 Life!
These three need to take their act on the road, they’re better than The Three Stooges.
I like Jennifer and Malaya but I am very much enjoying Jennifer getting put in her place re: high school shit. It’s fine to value your good times but cmon Jen you’re in college now NOBODY CARES.
Now that I think of it how has Jennifer held onto this belief so long? I guess she retains her ability to socially network so she thinks she’s still “popular” but… idk I feel like most of the folks I met were over that shit on like day 1 of college classes.
unusual feedback in Forest Hall.
It hasn’t been that long. It hasn’t even been a year. And Jennifer is one of those people who think popularity applies everywhere.
I suspect most of the people you knew in college weren’t actually popular in high school. That was my circle and we were definitely over it by college – but we’d never really had it.
Of course, Jennifer’s clinging to it because it’s all she has. She’s got no emotional support from her parents and basically never has. She lost her best friend/unacknowledged girlfriend over the DUI that was part of that life.
She’s a Freshman, She’s literally fresh out of high school.
Plus, she’s being enabled by a social manipulator.
“I’m not a dork!” Immediately confesses the dorkiest things about herself.
sal, you sweet summer child, some day you’ll have to realise you and malaya are basically the same text with a different font
God, I really hope this doesn’t lead in to Jennifer deciding not to help Sal with her actual problems because she felt disrespected. But. Like. It’s Jennifer. So. That’s very possible.
Jennifer’s takeaway from this arc is definitely going to be “other people don’t understand me”.
caring about prom in college is the dorkiest shit
clearly malaya and jennifer should interact more
I feel like “Goddammit Malaya!” should become the next “Shut up Wesley!”
Hg
as a veritable nerd, I will say that both getting eaten out and eating out, regardless of locale, sound like a much better way to spend prom night than attending prom itself does
of course, I ended up taking the much more bland “play video games at home” option
Malaya’s argument seems fallacious to me. If Sal disagreed just because she doesn’t want to face the fact that Malaya’s right, why is she agreeing with them now??
Malaya’s argument is that Jennifer is not remotely “cool” trying to tout stuff from high cool in college. Sal, who is the embodiment of cool and okay with dorks, is trying to give Jennifer some helpful advice.
I’m just talking about Malaya’s allegation in the last panel, not the strip as a whole.
Tired: Prom
Wired: Grom
The question is whether or not alcoholism is standard nerd shit or not, cause Billie had that shit on lock.
I don’t know what I expected, but it wasn’t this. Sal needs to keep her hands off of people.
“getting eaten out in a white castle parking lot”
wish i had stories like that. just some crazy sh%$ that i can just pull out at random.
for me, highschool was all panic attacks, mental health issues, parents getting divorced, and losing my home. it’d be nice to have fun stories like that one.
“oh, i was too busy getting my b&@@y Bounded by a friend in a wendy’s bathroom; it was chill.”