Dumbing of Age Book Twelve

Dumbing of Age

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May 12, 2026

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by David M Willis on June 20, 2012 at 12:01 am
  • 04 - Time Keeps on Slippin'
└ Tags: amazi-girl, dorothy

Discussion (127) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. Kafloobop
    Kafloobop
    June 20, 2012 at 12:02 am | #

    Gah! A bush! My greatest foe!

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      June 20, 2012 at 12:04 am | #

      But he hasn’t been in power for almost 4 years now…

      • Bekah
        Bekah
        June 20, 2012 at 12:07 am | #

        *groans*

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          June 20, 2012 at 12:10 am | #

          Sorry, couldn’t resist that pun.

          • NCP19
            NCP19
            June 20, 2012 at 12:10 am | #

            …not the pun I thought of first…

            • Random Guy
              Random Guy
              June 20, 2012 at 3:17 am | #

              One should never try to pee on thorny bushes in the dark.

              • Andiemus
                Andiemus
                June 20, 2012 at 3:48 am | #

                Mental… Imagery….. Gah!

              • Bekah
                Bekah
                June 20, 2012 at 7:23 am | #

                Teeth.

                Eh? Eh? Anyone? Just me? Oh well… forget I said anything.

              • N0083rP00F
                N0083rP00F
                June 20, 2012 at 2:58 pm | #

                replace “Thorny Bushes” with Electric Fence” and you have a game classic from Blammo ……

              • BD
                BD
                June 22, 2012 at 9:37 am | #

                That sounds like the beginning of an awesome story we’re never going to hear.

                • Witch [Soul] of Heart
                  Witch [Soul] of Heart
                  January 29, 2014 at 12:24 am | #

                  One of the remakes of Bloody Mary (one of the B&W ones, I think) had just that.

    • Aizat
      Aizat
      June 20, 2012 at 12:50 am | #

      A BUSH? IMPOSSIBLE! Wait, that’s completely possible.

      • Nerdman
        Nerdman
        June 20, 2012 at 7:12 pm | #

        Curse you bush! From this day forth I swear vengeance! I shall hunt down your kind and murder them to extinction!

      • Lucca
        Lucca
        June 21, 2012 at 5:20 am | #

        Behold bush! I shall now defeat you with my superior mental mind powers!

        • dusk
          dusk
          June 24, 2012 at 5:11 am | #

          Then you shall be known as my mind slave steve.

    • Blob Marley
      Blob Marley
      June 20, 2012 at 1:06 am | #

      A razor and some lotion will help with that problem.

    • Undrave
      Undrave
      June 20, 2012 at 1:35 am | #

      That’s what she said!

  2. Jen Aside
    Jen Aside
    June 20, 2012 at 12:02 am | #

    By which she means the NES Track & Field? =D

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      June 20, 2012 at 12:03 am | #

      She used the old ruler trick to win.

      • Doctor_Who
        Doctor_Who
        June 20, 2012 at 12:08 am | #

        By which you mean she won because she rules so much.

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          June 20, 2012 at 12:17 am | #

          Not exactly but let’s just go with that, OK?

      • Pooga
        Pooga
        June 22, 2012 at 1:58 am | #

        That was the arcade game, and I always found a pen more effective. Even after they put guards around the tops of the buttons, you could usually get a pen to make contact. On the downside, I’m sure I permanently flattened the knuckle on my left hand middle finger playing that game…

  3. Yotomoe
    Yotomoe
    June 20, 2012 at 12:04 am | #

    STOP RUNNING I LOVE YOUUUUUUUUUU

    • M M
      M M
      June 20, 2012 at 12:09 am | #

      Now that would be an awkward love triangle…

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        June 20, 2012 at 12:14 am | #

        that’d prolly be more of a tetrihedron…

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          June 20, 2012 at 12:20 am | #

          All we need now is a convincing looking male crossdresser and it be a trapezium.

          • Khrene Cleaver
            Khrene Cleaver
            June 20, 2012 at 1:27 am | #

            Why wouldn’t it just be a trapizoid

            • Plasma Mongoose
              Plasma Mongoose
              June 20, 2012 at 2:49 am | #

              For some reason, the first thing that came to mind when I saw trapizoid was a genderbender Freakazoid.

              • Random Guy
                Random Guy
                June 20, 2012 at 3:23 am | #

                http://i211.photobucket.com/albums/bb177/jiveturkey06/freakazoid2af5.jpg

                • saorla
                  saorla
                  June 20, 2012 at 11:37 am | #

                  Thank you for that. I love freakazoid. 😀

              • Izzy
                Izzy
                June 20, 2012 at 3:23 am | #

                You mean Freakazoid. No need to be redundant and say the some thing over and over

              • Zababcd
                Zababcd
                June 20, 2012 at 9:07 am | #

                I feel compelled to interject here to correct the spelling of tetrahedron and trapezoid. Not you, Plasma Mongoose, I know you knew how to spell it correctly (probably).

                • Plasma Mongoose
                  Plasma Mongoose
                  June 20, 2012 at 11:56 pm | #

                  Trapezium: 4-sided shape with no parallel sides.
                  Trapizoid: 4-sided shape with one set of parallel sides.

                • Zababcd
                  Zababcd
                  June 22, 2012 at 3:28 am | #

                  Trapezoid: 4-sided shape with one set of parallel sides.

                  Both trapezium and trapezoid are spelled with an ‘e’.

    • Aizat
      Aizat
      June 20, 2012 at 12:51 am | #

      WAIT! I HAVE SOMETHING FOR YOU!

  4. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    June 20, 2012 at 12:05 am | #

    If only AG was wearing something that would make her easier to grab…. HMMMMMM!

    • Bekah
      Bekah
      June 20, 2012 at 12:07 am | #

      If she’s smart, that cape can be easily removed.

      • Spazman
        Spazman
        June 20, 2012 at 6:50 am | #

        No Capes!

        http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jy2YhxXn7NY

        • Emma
          Emma
          June 20, 2012 at 9:01 am | #

          Yay!! Incredibles reference is….
          Incredible. Oh, I should’ve seen that coming. I apologize for that.

      • Mrelegos
        Mrelegos
        June 20, 2012 at 10:58 am | #

        It could fasten with a pair of magnets. Holds fine under normal circumstances, but put it under the slightest tension and it’ll just pull off.

    • lord of dance
      lord of dance
      June 20, 2012 at 12:14 am | #

      she can use that cape to steal someones phone from their hand… i dont think dorothy should go anywhere NEAR that cape

  5. Doctor_Who
    Doctor_Who
    June 20, 2012 at 12:07 am | #

    Hmmm, think Dorothy will find a way to cross reference new students with school team records?

    • lord of dance
      lord of dance
      June 20, 2012 at 12:16 am | #

      as i understand it iu is a big school. even if she shortened it to freshman track girls with brown hair i imagine it would be quite the list

      • AngryBamboo
        AngryBamboo
        June 20, 2012 at 5:57 am | #

        What makes her think amazigirl is a freshman? I know She just showed up this year, but realisticly it could be anybody who just decided to be a vigilante one day

        • lord of dance
          lord of dance
          June 20, 2012 at 10:36 am | #

          hunch id imagine. that or a transfer student. its flimsy but she seems too well trained and experienced to have been put together in a spur of the moment, and no ones heard of her before this year

      • lordphulish
        lordphulish
        June 20, 2012 at 9:23 am | #

        She doesn’t know whether amazigirl is wearing a wig or not.

    • Brasca1
      Brasca1
      June 20, 2012 at 12:17 am | #

      Reminds me of when Ras Alghul tracked down Batman and figured out he was Bruce Wayne. Wonder if Galasso might do the same to marry off Talia to run his pizza empire.

      • Spazman
        Spazman
        June 20, 2012 at 6:51 am | #

        Damn. Can’t think of a response to this that doesn’t involve sausage.

  6. Kurai Seraphim
    Kurai Seraphim
    June 20, 2012 at 12:08 am | #

    Countdown until she drops her DS?

    • NCP19
      NCP19
      June 20, 2012 at 12:11 am | #

      Yeah, you probably got it right.

    • Undrave
      Undrave
      June 20, 2012 at 1:37 am | #

      She changed her handle on it to ‘Amazi Girl so Danny wouldn’t know, so it doesn’t really matter much.

  7. Sensedog
    Sensedog
    June 20, 2012 at 12:09 am | #

    That might explain why Dorothy has a nice figure. However, I would imagine that even if Dorothy can catch her, what exactly could she do to force Amazi-Girl to answer her questions?

    *Awaits the inevitable comments from the shipping department*

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      June 20, 2012 at 12:15 am | #

      force her to watch “The Sound of Music”, an idea she got from her favorate show.

      • Historyman68
        Historyman68
        June 20, 2012 at 2:08 am | #

        Nice one.

  8. Yotomoe
    Yotomoe
    June 20, 2012 at 12:21 am | #

    Amazigirl was pretty cool with being seen in public and being pretty conspicuous before Dorothy took a picture. Dorothy probably could have gotten a decent pic if she hid out.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      June 20, 2012 at 12:31 am | #

      She wants to remain an urban legend.

    • Zephindabius
      Zephindabius
      June 20, 2012 at 12:43 am | #

      That is a suspiciously valid point. Amazi-Girl is a known public figure, and even signs autographs. Why would she not want her picture taken? Is it because she is a known vigilante who can be sued by the people that she “brings to justice”, or does she merely hate paparazzi?

      It has been clarified that her identity cannot be verified from her costume, as Billie and Danny have both failed to make the connection between mask and person. In addition, it seems very implausible for there not to be a picture of her since she does, in fact, make public appearances. Since that is the assumption, it also brings into question her fanbase. Her fans are likely to try to deduce who she is on facial recognition alone, and it should be fairly easy to come up with an identification with the amount of research obsessed fans are likely to put into their free time.

      So, what does she have against the photo? If Amazi-Girl is not afraid of being identified in costume, and she is not afraid of becoming a public figure, what other reason could she have to avoid media contact?

      • Kernanator
        Kernanator
        June 20, 2012 at 12:56 am | #

        She’s trying to keep to genre conventions. Everyone knows that dark vigilantes can’t be photographed.

      • GenericScreenName101
        GenericScreenName101
        June 20, 2012 at 2:48 am | #

        Dina is just taking precautions because she doesn’t want pictures of her in crime fighting gear.

        • Spazman
          Spazman
          June 20, 2012 at 6:57 am | #

          But Amazigirl is Ultracar.

          Wait, Ben is Glory?

          • Gneiss
            Gneiss
            June 20, 2012 at 9:20 am | #

            So….you’re saying that Ben knows something about Glory?

            • Mrelegos
              Mrelegos
              June 20, 2012 at 10:56 am | #

              So can we assume there is some kind of connection between Ben and Glory?

      • George
        George
        June 20, 2012 at 4:49 pm | #

        I’d bet she keeps her public appearances short to avoid people looking too closely. We never saw how many autographs went out, after all, and it’s early enough in the year that even the most obsessive fans wouldn’t have seen her more than once or twice. A picture would be something people could stare at and compare to other pictures without their memory messing things up. And as for Billie and Danny- Danny’s only seen her in the dark, and Billie never got a good look at her face (and might not know who Amber is). The party guests probably got a better look at her, but might not have included anyone she knows. The picture would be seen by everyone, even Mike and Ethan, and Mike would definitely recognize and expose her because he’s Mike.

  9. Aizat
    Aizat
    June 20, 2012 at 12:38 am | #

    Dorothy:Oh yeah, well I’m black belt in karate.

    Amazi-Girl:So? I’m a master in judo, jujitsu and kung fu.

    • bwernard
      bwernard
      June 20, 2012 at 12:43 am | #

      “Batman: year one” reference? Or am I overthinking this?

      • Aizat
        Aizat
        June 20, 2012 at 12:49 am | #

        I never knew I did a “Batman: Year One” reference.

        • bwernard
          bwernard
          June 20, 2012 at 1:10 am | #

          Linking the scene that confused me: http://scans-daily.dreamwidth.org/1162322.html

          Second page, Selina Kyle vs. Disguised pre-Batman Bruce Wayne

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      June 20, 2012 at 12:44 am | #

      If Dotty learnt karate from one of those McDojos, then chances are, she didn’t learn how to fight too well.

      • Shnon
        Shnon
        June 20, 2012 at 5:50 am | #

        cracked reader?

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          June 20, 2012 at 11:48 pm | #

          YES!

      • Mrelegos
        Mrelegos
        June 20, 2012 at 10:55 am | #

        Somebody’s been reading Cracked recently.

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          June 20, 2012 at 11:48 pm | #

          I also read something similar from much earlier CRACKED articles.

          • Mrelegos
            Mrelegos
            June 21, 2012 at 12:03 pm | #

            Yeah, I thought that particular section seemed like a repeat of an earlier article…

    • Ancestral Hamster
      Ancestral Hamster
      June 20, 2012 at 2:48 am | #

      “There’s something you should know.”

      “What’s that?”

      “I’m not left-handed either.”

      • N0083rP00F
        N0083rP00F
        June 20, 2012 at 3:04 pm | #

        Princess Bride reference …. *squeee*

        • Mrelegos
          Mrelegos
          June 20, 2012 at 9:33 pm | #

          You keep using the word…I do not think it means what you think it means…

  10. Kernanator
    Kernanator
    June 20, 2012 at 12:46 am | #

    Well now, Amazi Girl has cleared that hurdle, but can she deal with a pole?

    • Aizat
      Aizat
      June 20, 2012 at 12:50 am | #

      A person from Poland or a long metal bar?

      • Kernanator
        Kernanator
        June 20, 2012 at 12:54 am | #

        …Yes.

        • Aizat
          Aizat
          June 20, 2012 at 12:55 am | #

          *blasts Kernanator* Freaking smartass.

          • Kernanator
            Kernanator
            June 20, 2012 at 12:58 am | #

            It’s a metal bar made in Poland.

            Seriously though, the second one was the original intended meaning, but I couldn’t resist.

            • Aizat
              Aizat
              June 20, 2012 at 12:59 am | #

              I know you meant well, it’s just that I always wanted to use that joke.

  11. Rayrayrave
    Rayrayrave
    June 20, 2012 at 1:08 am | #

    I hope this doesn’t come off as offensive, but Dorothy and Amber are both a little short and curvy for cross-country and running stars. I’m just saying; they’re usually tall and lean.

    • Batman1016
      Batman1016
      June 20, 2012 at 1:42 am | #

      You’ve obviously never hung out with the throwers on the track team. And my HS female CC captain was just barely 5″ tall.

      • Rayrayrave
        Rayrayrave
        June 20, 2012 at 2:13 pm | #

        I was best friends with the star female thrower at my high school. She was 6″4′. An amazon she was.

    • secret
      secret
      June 20, 2012 at 1:57 am | #

      that was my first thought as well (too curvy)

    • Jackson
      Jackson
      June 20, 2012 at 1:27 pm | #

      I would not be surprised at all if Dorothy played soccer.

  12. Rayrayrave
    Rayrayrave
    June 20, 2012 at 1:08 am | #

    *track not running

  13. bwernard
    bwernard
    June 20, 2012 at 1:13 am | #

    The blue-colored baloons make her voice sound like a female version of Nolan’s Batman? ’cause thats awesomebabies.

    • extremist343
      extremist343
      April 22, 2015 at 10:40 pm | #

      Yes, this, totally, yes.

  14. Robert
    Robert
    June 20, 2012 at 1:13 am | #

    That brush is filled with thicket, Dorothy. You want to run through all that be my guest..but you’ll be pulling twigs out of your skin for a week.

  15. LurkerAbove
    LurkerAbove
    June 20, 2012 at 1:29 am | #

    So, Amazi-girl knows Parkour as well?

    • Scoops!
      Scoops!
      June 20, 2012 at 1:44 am | #

      Amazi-girl has trained to be the best at everything.

      • lord of dance
        lord of dance
        June 20, 2012 at 1:48 am | #

        and she doesn’t even need a multi-billion dollar inheritance to make it all work. or i assume so, not knowing who she is and all

        • bwernard
          bwernard
          June 20, 2012 at 2:11 am | #

          Google and wikipedia weren’t around yet whe Bruce did it. Kids today have it easy…

    • HMRC4EVR
      HMRC4EVR
      June 20, 2012 at 4:44 am | #

      She’d butter know Parkour cause there’s only a small margarine of error if she wants to slip away!

      • Mrelegos
        Mrelegos
        June 20, 2012 at 9:30 pm | #

        Otherwise, Dorothy will do a major Spread on her…

  16. Raen
    Raen
    June 20, 2012 at 2:10 am | #

    It’s a good thing Superman and Lois were never a couple, or this would seem strange indeed.

    …*cries into beef bourguignon and ketchup*

    • Heavensrun
      Heavensrun
      June 20, 2012 at 6:42 am | #

      Eh, this is more like Batman and Vicki Vale.

      Wait, that brings the same problem.

      …if you want to call it that.

  17. Wonder Wig
    Wonder Wig
    June 20, 2012 at 2:36 am | #

    Seems like amber is aerodynamically curvacious.

  18. Aegon01
    Aegon01
    June 20, 2012 at 2:47 am | #

    Amber is getting hotter by the minute.

    • Roborat
      Roborat
      June 20, 2012 at 3:49 pm | #

      That’s cause she is running in a poorly ventilated bodysuit.

  19. Uniqueantique
    Uniqueantique
    June 20, 2012 at 2:47 am | #

    She just doesn’t like Dorothy.

    • Heavensrun
      Heavensrun
      June 20, 2012 at 6:40 am | #

      She knows that Dorothy is Danny’s ex, and that her similarities to Danny’s ex are why he didn’t want to date her.

  20. Historyman68
    Historyman68
    June 20, 2012 at 5:45 am | #

    So. Badass.

  21. Malisteen
    Malisteen
    June 20, 2012 at 7:25 am | #

    Am I the only one who imagine’s amazi-girl’s white-on-blue speech bubbles voiced in Christian Bale’s hilarious Batman growl?

    • WaywardCat
      WaywardCat
      June 20, 2012 at 8:35 am | #

      No… no that’s more or less how I’ve been reading it too. Maybe a little more feminine, but not by much. I’m not sure if I’m distracted or amused by the way it sounds in my mind.

    • Zababcd
      Zababcd
      June 20, 2012 at 9:22 am | #

      I get the semi-comical-‘fear not, [people/citizens] of [wherever]’-while- posing-majestically/egotistically sort of superhero voice, but a growl does work better for a female superhero. I will probably read with both voices from now on.

      I have no idea what Christian Bale’s Batman growl is like. I don’t like/know superhero-based anything, really, so I’m not familiar with particular portrayals (although I don’t think Batman counts as a superhero, since I don’t think he actually has superpowers. That’s a matter of technical definition, not judgement of the hero, so if anyone’s a Batman worshipper, quit yelling at your computer).

      • vlademir1
        vlademir1
        June 20, 2012 at 2:30 pm | #

        Just because I’m a pedantic ass:
        Depending who you ask he actually does. He has a metahuman level of ability in bringing out peak performance in people through training and/or a metahuman level of ability to plan and be prepared for any potential contingency.
        How true this is rather depends on interpretation, but is something I have seen/heard mentioned by various fans over time. I don’t think this is the DCU canonical interpretation however.

        • begbert2
          begbert2
          June 20, 2012 at 3:19 pm | #

          He also can breathe in space, according to officially licensed merchandise.

          I think he may also have flown alongside the other superfriends once or twice as well, in a licensed cartoon.

    • begbert2
      begbert2
      June 20, 2012 at 10:45 am | #

      http://www.dumbingofage.com/2012/comic/book-2/03-the-first-step-towards-recovery/voice/

      Yes, it is in fact a Bale voice.

      Which is awesome.

    • Junk
      Junk
      June 20, 2012 at 11:41 am | #

      I got that same feeling.

  22. Zababcd
    Zababcd
    June 20, 2012 at 11:03 am | #

    It would feel more superhero-ey for me with a blue ‘night’ tint, or polarised brightness, or a combination of the two. Not that I’m complaining.

    • scruffy
      scruffy
      June 20, 2012 at 11:01 pm | #

      i’m going to find some tinted shades so i can see the world like that during my night-time chase scenes, now

  23. Junk
    Junk
    June 20, 2012 at 11:41 am | #

    Long time reader, first time poster. I just wanted to say that these Amazi-Girl strips are my absolute favorites. I am mad impressed with your strip and thank you so very, very much for giving me something to wake up and enjoy each and every day. Thank you!

  24. Gnoka
    Gnoka
    June 20, 2012 at 12:00 pm | #

    What does she keep in that one large holster?

    • David
      David M Willis
      June 20, 2012 at 2:09 pm | #

      She has a large pocket hanging from each side of her belt, so there are two of them. They hold Things.

      • Nerdman
        Nerdman
        June 20, 2012 at 7:16 pm | #

        Ah, things. Essential to any aspiring superhero.

  25. Kragar
    Kragar
    June 20, 2012 at 3:56 pm | #

    Hey! My friend got up to the Phoenix Comic-con and got me a poster from ya. 😀 (Sadly he didn’t have any idea of anything for you to draw. :P)

    I ran cross country, and track, just never did hurdles.

  26. Paul1963
    Paul1963
    June 20, 2012 at 4:07 pm | #

    Gotta say, that hedge-leap shows a degree of agility I would not previously have credited Amber/Amazi-Girl with.

    • Aydr
      Aydr
      June 20, 2012 at 4:08 pm | #

      What does Amber have to do with anything?

    • HMRC4EVR
      HMRC4EVR
      June 20, 2012 at 7:50 pm | #

      I might be way off base, but I’m getting a ‘HIM’ vibe from Amazi-Girl, and I don’t mean HIM from PPG-rather Him from Cannonball Run.

      When Amber puts on the suit and becomes Amazi-Girl, there is a subconscious mental effect that she really is a different person who’s not limited by what may or may not adversly effect Amber. She knows she’s Amber so it’s not like a GRAND DELUSION! but rather she’s who she needs to be to be Amazi Girl and stuff like a hedge or critisim just isn’t gonna stop her.

  27. Paul1963
    Paul1963
    June 20, 2012 at 4:08 pm | #

    Whoa, I got assigned a different Gravatar than the one I have at Shortpacked!
    Still the wrong gender, though…

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      June 20, 2012 at 4:32 pm | #

      This is why I never base someone’s gender by their grav.

  28. shadowMobster
    shadowMobster
    June 20, 2012 at 6:08 pm | #

    THE HUNT BEGINS.

  29. Nerdman
    Nerdman
    June 20, 2012 at 7:20 pm | #

    “Nice try, media hound! But Spider-man has taught me that no reporter is friends with a superhero!’

  30. Maycroft
    Maycroft
    June 22, 2012 at 5:32 am | #

    Owned!

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