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It's a pretty rigid format but we keep the content loose, you know?
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I’m guessing she gave them to Ethan as a gift and it was a heartwarming moment of friendship – that makes sense from the context and presumably transformers is something they really bonded over (there was a flashback with Amber watching it when she was younger, right?). So threatening to destroy them is thus, like, a big deal.
Or a very special DOA round of “Who wants to be converteeed?” Ethan is our next contestant with Joyce as the main Converter! Will he go straight or fall for unicorns that fart lavender clouds of happiness? Find out on “Who wants to be converteed?”
I have a feeling the Friday comic will be mostly Ethan hemming and hawing, then either “I’m gay” will be the fourth panel followed by cliffhanger, or the third will be “I’m gay” and the fourth will be Joyce’s reaction face.
No, he told her that in the strip where he agrees to go to church with her. He might have to clarify that he doesn’t plan to convert at some point in the ensuing conversation, but I’m pretty sure he’s not going to lead with it.
There was also her comment about having “an affinity for God’s chosen people” since after all the last guy she went out with was Joe, who’s also Jewish.
And then he’ll prove it by making out with Walky.. Joyce will counter that it means nothing by making out with Dorothy. Dina will misread the behavioural patterns and make out with Amber.
Meanwhile, Sal is making out with Marcie, while Billie looks on in drunken jealousy. When she reaches the end of her booze supply, Billie’s drunk and desperate enough to go confront Ruth, only to find her making out with Daisy. She staggers back to her room, but, unable to face Sal and Marcie again, goes into the other side of the suite, where she discovers that Sarah has taken her advice and is making out up! Is making up with Raidah. With smooches. Increasingly freaked out, she stumbles away, and ends up falling into Mary and Roz’s room, because Mary still hasn’t learned to lock the door when she’s naked. With Roz. And Joe. And the Squad 48 girls. Billie flees the dorm, past Agatha and Asma who are making out behind the front desk, and manages to catch a bus home. When she stumbles through her front door, Mike is there. Just staring at her. And fucking her mom.
Billie wakes up screaming. It’s morning. She’s lying on her bed in her dorm room, amidst empty bottles. Sal is alone in the other bed, flipping her off. “Thank fuckin’ God, it was just a nightmare,” Billie says.
Camera pans over and zooms in. There’s a nickel on her nightstand.
If the next comic is some OTHER characters and we are left hanging on whether or not Ethan is going to actually go through with it and tell Joyce, I think I just might scream and annoy my neighbor.
Ethan would rather pay for something he already owns than to confess for something. Immersion ruined. College students would punt a baby before they spend money.
Basically if your family already has an account and you know the log-in stuff there’s nothing stopping you. Except other family members looking in the recently watched section and going “Who was watching Dinosaur Train and Chinatown?” or the like. Multiple people watching stuff on it with wildly different tastes can get some really bizarre recommendation combos.
I’m old enough to realize it’s the future and I’m the same age as her. Keep in mind that Amber probably grew up with VCR just like me so…this is like…double future already.
A BBS stands for “Bulletin Board System” basically, back before the Internet was popular, people ran dial up programs on their computers that accepted incoming calls from people on modems (we’re talking 1200bps, etc).
They would talk on message forums, play horribly sexist but ‘teh best thing evar’ at the time Legend of the Red Dragon (among other games), and basically it was a pre-form of Internet.
In San Diego, where I grew up, there was a directory of hundreds of bulletin boards. Some of them were up all the time, some could handle MULTIPLE USERS. Some games even allowed for interaction with OTHER BULLETIN BOARDS as things got fancy. A whole sub-culture built up, parallel at the time to MUDs and the like.
Howerver, as the Internet grew in prevalence, Bulletin Boards fell to the wayside. There’s still a handful out there, running outdated software via emulators and allowing telnet (or SSH) connections via hacks and mods. But the era of the BBS is long behind us.
Hmm. Watched the first one. That vintage ’96 TV computer animation is a little… hard to look at for long. Does the story go interesting places (say, Babylon 5 style)? If it just sticks to basic kids-level storytelling, it won’t be worth the eye strain.
Speak for yourself. My father gave me a fully equipped tool kit when I went to college. Not that I’m good at home repairs, just in the off chance that I might need it. I think I had to use a wrench once or twice on a leaky faucet.
“Awful jackass buttface…wonderful. Now, if he just tells her tomorrow…
I too remember dialup BB’s. And my Leading Edge IbM clone with 2 floppy disk drives: one drive to put game on, and one drive to ‘save it’, as it had no hard drive. 2500 bucks for the computer and an extra $800 for the hard drive. I scrapped up 25k, but that final 800 just too much.
Yup it’s the future. My current pc costs the same as the LE and measures its HD in TB. My smart phone has more legs than that LE did. But, damn, it rocked back in 1984.
And yes I would not mind having Beast Wars on dvd, not at all.
Pfft- future smuture, when the future gives us those fancy Jetson clothes, then give me a call, but till then I’m gonna rewatch my Power Rangers season 1 on VHS damnit!
Last time homosexuality was brought up to her she showed no signs of thinking they can be ‘fixed’ and simply says it’s a sin. Being an atheist is a sin and she’s best friends with one now.
It’s a common belief among conservative/fundamentalist Evangelicals that homosexuality is either a choice, or a test of faith and obedience from God. The idea of “sin” generally implies some level of choice, unless one is a strict Calvinist. The idea of homosexual behavior as a sin virtually requires that aspect of free choice to be present in order to not lead into some very undesirable theological positions. Fundamentalists insist on this not because they want to hate homosexuals (although certainly some do), but to protect the idea that a just and loving God is compatible with scripture forbidding homosexual acts. In some way or another, Joyce will have to confront and resolve this, if she is not oblivious to it altogether.
Ethan lied about being straight and as soon as he’s outed he’ll probably admit he doesn’t really want to be Joyce’s boyfriend.
Joyce hates liars so much her speech turns black when talking about them, and as far as I can tell the only reason she’s even in college is to find a husband. I’d say the disappointment here is going to be catastrophic. Even if she weren’t a Christian with hangups about homosexuality, this is a pretty condemning setup for Ethan.
Even if she accepts Ethan as a gay man, Ethan is kind of spineless. He cannot set up or enforce the kind of boundaries that allow Joyce to be friends with Dorothy, and without them, it seems like it’s fairly difficult for anyone to truly enjoy spending time with Joyce.
This is true. And I expect Joyce to be hurt or angry in any case. But this story has also just finished driving home for us all of the things Joyce is struggling with that she will (at least temporarily) no longer have to worry about once Ethan comes out. So I expect there to be some sense of releif as well. So the question is what outcome sets up the most potential for humor and future story development.
Because not having a boyfriend will totally stop Joyce from being horney. Just because the guy will change doesn’t mean her emotional situation will. She’s actively on the manhunt after all.
When I say she won’t have to worry, I mean it in the sense that her opportunity and immediate temptation to act on those desires will be temporarily removed… not that trying to act on them would’ve been very successful at this point, but Joyce doesn’t know that yet.
I feel like this is bad character development, like a not a great plotline, because Ethan’s not making this choice himself. It’s being foisted on him. Your MC’s always supposed to be the game-changer himself!
Ethan’s not really a Main Character (that’s what your MC stood for, right?) and he did change the game by creating this situation. His choices have created these consequences.
Ethan’s a main character over in Shortpacked!. Here… to the best of my recollection, he hasn’t appeared at all outside the setup for this plotline. Even Dina has more going on than he does.
I can think of lots of protagonists who had to be forced into acting like they had a spine before they could actually grow one. Besides, it’s not really character “development” if the character is always the one changing the world and never the one being changed by it.
It doesn’t have to be development into a good person to be good character development, though. He created this situation himself, and in doing so showed himself to be in a vulnerable enough position that he’s willing to ignore a pretty major aspect of him if it makes it possible for him to fit in and be a part of the hang-out — that may have changed him further as a person if Amber hadn’t stopped him when she did (isn’t stopping him…now. Dang weird temporal grammar). This is just Amber doing damage control (and in doing so, establishing herself as much more assertive than we know her as in previous versions, which is character elaboration — I’m not sure about calling it development — for Amber and so on).
Plus, the choice is still up to him when he goes in there. He can say it, he can not say it, he can say a much more minor reveal, he can go crazy and jump out the window, etc.
Amber, I totally agree that Ethan needs to come clear to Joyce. But… maybe not in the middle of a restaurant while surrounded by their mutual friends? Maybe that’s not a good place for that?
Especially not immediately after his not-girlfriend returned from the bathroom embarrassed and near tears! This has trouble written- NO!
This has Trouble stamped all over it.
I wonder if using the rainbow ink on the stamp will just make the wound sting more for Joyce or if it is meant to warn her…
So…this’ll probably spread, now. Either he announces it to everyone or he says it to only Joyce and she spreads it in her shock (á la “You’re GAY!?”)
Dorothy and Dina seem like they wouldn’t mind. (Dina might not realize why some people would mind. Then again, looking at social structures, she may have come across the whole ‘certain sexual orientations carry a negative stigma’ thing.) Danny hardly knows Ethan, so he wouldn’t have any form of reaction either way (except maybe “oh, is this that gay guy you were dating?”) Walky is a bit more childish in this version and seems to follow a man code which might be opposed to the whole homosexual thing, but on the other hand he’s been shown to be pretty clever and may actually be childish enough to only judge a person by if they like Nachitos and cartoons.
Basically, it seems like the only person to have a strong reaction to this will be Joyce.
Awesome moment.
But I think it’s gonna go poorly. Some people have expressed the possibility of Joyce trying to convert Ethan to heterosexuality, but, I have a different guess:
She just saw another girl showing up to “steal” her boyfriend. And we’ve seen her decry as ridiculous the idea that Ethan is gay before. Maybe she’ll assume evil, manipulative Amber is forcing her twue wuv Ethan to lie so she can keep him for herself?
ETHAN!! Even though you just told me, YOUR BEST FRIEND how you want to be feel free of your own sexuality, YOU GO IN THERE RIGHT NOW AND BRING UP YOUR SEXUALITY!!
totally SMH here at the thought of having to discuss your sexuality based on what,when,how others feel you should do this. Man just told Amber how he feels about it and her first response is “TOUGH SHIT HOW YOU FEEL, GO TELL HER NOW” !?!?!?!
Just cause she’s all butthurt he came out when he did, she’s now gonna make sure everyone knows he’s “GAY” and nothing else? o_0
His own damned fault for lieing to her and leading her on. You can not let your sexuality define you without using an unsuspecting and hopeful woman as your beard. All he had to do was not talk about it and just be geeky, like he seems to want.
yeah, but it’s totes not Amber’s right to tell him when and how to do this, or even if he has to. I almost want to say, “since when is lying wrong,” since I’ve never seen a decent argument against it outside certain texts, but I won’t go down that path. If something makes him happy-er, isn’t that his business? Who says he “has” to do anything? Where are we getting this “right and wrong” anyway?
Teeechnically I agree with timemonkey, but I totes can’t stand Amber yelling at people and ordering them around–especially people she hasn’t bothered to talk to for a while. I kiiiinda wanna punch her in the face for being a rude mo’fo with no class, compassion, or respect. (I’m a girl so that’s okay, right?) There’s a kind way to tell someone they’re wrong.
This is not it. This is the way fundamentalists convert you and jerks overbear you.
You see, Petre, this lie is not about Ethan anymore. It is about Joyce. In the end, she will be the one hurt by Ethan’s lie. And the longer it takes for her to know the truth, the worse will be latter.
So, yeah, it is totally in Amber’s position, as a friend, to yell at Ethan and tell him he is being a complete asshole. Ethan decision to whether or not to lie would be fine if it was only about him. But it is not, so he have to stop.
If not now, then when? After they start making out? After she tells her parents about him? After their first kiss and he calls her his girlfriend – oh wait. The right time was when he could tell she was getting ideas about them. The right time was not making the decision to lie. The longer he waits now, the worse it will be.
I agree that he should do it in private, but there is going to be no good way to break this news. I’m concerned that if he doesn’t do it right now this second, then he’ll rationalize and procrastinate because it isn’t a good time.
He is going to hurt her. Nothing he can do now but try to minimize it by getting it over with.
He needs to dump her right now, but he doesn’t need to tell her he’s gay right now, or ever.
I mean, there’s always this approach: “Uh Joyce? I was just talking to my ex-girlfriend, and after hugging her I realized that I wouldn’t marry you if you were the last woman on earth. So I’ll just pick up the tab for tonight’s pizza (and subs) and we’ll call it good, okay?”
Which is not quite the same thing as having sympathy for him right now. I understand his confusion, his frustration, his exhaustion — but the part where he’s led Joyce on deliberately is just unnecessary. GO SIT IN THE CORNER, ETHAN, AND THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU’VE DONE
oh wait you’re eighteen
I think part of why teenagers are — comparatively! — self-centered is because when you’re a teen, everything seems so BIG and so SERIOUS and so IMPORTANT all the time. Just existing can feel exhausting, and at the same time when you’re feeling overwhelmed, you’re surrounded by adults who just smile fondly and shake their heads over everything you say, because they’re remembering their own teenage years through a filter of nostalgia, embarrassment, and self-deprecation. So no one ELSE takes you seriously.
This is not going to go well. But it may cause Joyce to reevaluate her stance on gays ———- nah it won’t —- she will make it her mission to “turn” him back to “normal”.
I wonder sometimes if we would be better off or worse off if we had to announce our sexuality when we met someone. you know:
“Hi, pleasure to meet you I’m mouse and I prefer to have sex with members of my own species.”
‘Hi Joyce, I’m Ethan and would like to be hated and oppressed by a disturbingly large segment of the population, including you! By the way, I also don’t want to be defined by my sexual preference, so let’s talk about transformers or batman. Both of which I would also bone given half the chance and a lot of lube. So yeah, homosexual, robosexual, and megachiropterexual. And how’s your day been?”
Well, this is shaping up to be an epic Friday. Although I have the sneaking suspicion Joyce will be more concerned with Ethan being Jewish than being gay. Or she knew all along, and thinks her love can cure him.
You tell him, Amber! I like Ethan but he needs to stop lying to Joyce.
Unrelated note- my only teeny tiny beef with this comic (that is AWESOME and I love it) is that there are so many practicing Christians (re: the comic where a bunch of people head off to church) and yet the only two Jews don’t seem to practice at all. I just wish that there were some practicing Jews around, is all. Just a tiny complaint. Carry on.
You sure you want somebody who isn’t Jewish and hasn’t grown up practicing Judaism, writing characters qrowing up as practicing Jews? Not to disparage Willis’s writing ability, but that’s sort of asking for trouble. Loopy reality-denying christians, he knows.
Well, perhaps just an off screen mention that someone went to shabbat? All I’m saying is that it’s kind of a bummer that the only two in the series don’t seem to practice at all.
This is the future where I can watch all my favorite TV shows on the computer with little to no interruption and watch as people whine in the comments section about the next season not being out.
Where did Hollywood go so wrong? I thought movies were supposed to be an escape from reality, a chance to put your worries aside and not have to think about any underlying ideas or concepts. Well, not anymore.
theonion.com/you-can...
It's not a new argument, of course, but Chesterton dismissed it effectively in 1908.
"You will hear everlastingly... this argument that the rich man cannot be bribed. The fact is, of course, that the rich man is bribed; he has been bribed already. That is why he is a rich man."
Aaron Rupar@atrupar.com ⋅ 17h
Hawley dismisses Trump lining his pockets with his memecoin: "Listen, I think nobody believes that Donald Trump can be bought. I mean, what does Donald Trump need more money for?"
wilbur, savvy enough to know he's in a comic strip but still not a great actor, awkwardly lifts a muffin up into frame so that we, the audience, understand that he has a muffin right now, which is very important narratively, but he's not really selling it well as an organic, human action
confirming that the reason there's been no Galaxy Version female characters in Blokees until now is that they felt they needed to make Round Lady Thighs For Ladies
It's #webcomicday? We have a special day???
Well, my name is Pat McHoarney and I draw 69 Mouse-Ear Blvd, a multigenerational story about women who all have sexy legs and probably other features. There was a grandmother, but she wasn't hot and so she died off-panel.
Elizabeth Holmes is in prison for defrauding investors through her blood-testing company, Theranos. Her partner, Billy Evans, is now trying to raise money for a company that describes itself as “the future of diagnostics.” nyti.ms/3FbtZm9
www.ebay.com/itm/23609767...
selling my netflix war for cybertron megatron -- the walmart exclusive one that came with pinpointer and lionizer (but being sold here without pinpointer and lionizer)
Gran... IS ALIVE?
okay, juliette still has brown hair, so this is probably definitely a flashback
i'm just surprised that the comic has remembered her, at all
Aaron Rupar @atrupar.com ⋅ 17h
Pavel
@spavel.bsky.social ⋅ 10d
The New York Times @nytimes.com ⋅ 5d
preternia @preternia.com ⋅ 3d
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Why would you threaten to destroy your own DVDs? That’s just silly, Amber!
I’m guessing she gave them to Ethan as a gift and it was a heartwarming moment of friendship – that makes sense from the context and presumably transformers is something they really bonded over (there was a flashback with Amber watching it when she was younger, right?). So threatening to destroy them is thus, like, a big deal.
She made her toys of them kiss. So yeah, Amber liking Beast Wars is definitely a thing.
Because Willis is a sell-out and advertising for Netflix! They’re paying him! It’s subtle capitalist subliminal domination of us all!
–your hipster moment of the day brought to you by Coca-Cola(TM)
Real hipsters only drink Hipster-Cola.
Nah, that went mainstream and now it sucks. These days, they drink a different cola… you probably haven’t heard of it.
I have, but only because I have 22 senses. So yeah I essentially cheated on that one. If you have a problem with that you can call 1-800-OSUFFER.
Oh…Now we’re gonna have a Sad Joyce Friday comic…:(
Or a very special DOA round of “Who wants to be converteeed?” Ethan is our next contestant with Joyce as the main Converter! Will he go straight or fall for unicorns that fart lavender clouds of happiness? Find out on “Who wants to be converteed?”
Yeah, I’m guessing its going to be this. Joyce is the type to think Ethan can be “cured” of this.
“God sent you to me so that I can HELP you!”
“…with my cooter.”
I imagine that will feed into Ethan realising, no, Amber is actually right and I shouldn’t deny myself any more.
I have a feeling the Friday comic will be mostly Ethan hemming and hawing, then either “I’m gay” will be the fourth panel followed by cliffhanger, or the third will be “I’m gay” and the fourth will be Joyce’s reaction face.
He could also tell her he’s jewish. That’s another thing he’s keeping from her right?
No, he told her that in the strip where he agrees to go to church with her. He might have to clarify that he doesn’t plan to convert at some point in the ensuing conversation, but I’m pretty sure he’s not going to lead with it.
No, Joyce knows that already. She made a remark somewhere about Ethan being “halfway there.”
There was also her comment about having “an affinity for God’s chosen people” since after all the last guy she went out with was Joe, who’s also Jewish.
You overestimate Joyce. She’s probably just going to tell Ethan that he’s not gay, silly, his shirt isn’t tight enough for him to be gay.
And then he’ll prove it by making out with Walky.. Joyce will counter that it means nothing by making out with Dorothy. Dina will misread the behavioural patterns and make out with Amber.
THE SMOOCHPOCALYPSE
Laugh of the Day™
And Danny will be standing there with the permanent slightly-apologetic look his face carries, and make out with the soda bottle. OTP!
Aw… I wanted a three-way smoochfest with Walky, Ethan, and Danny!
Meanwhile, Sal is making out with Marcie, while Billie looks on in drunken jealousy. When she reaches the end of her booze supply, Billie’s drunk and desperate enough to go confront Ruth, only to find her making out with Daisy. She staggers back to her room, but, unable to face Sal and Marcie again, goes into the other side of the suite, where she discovers that Sarah has taken her advice and is making
outup! Is making up with Raidah. With smooches. Increasingly freaked out, she stumbles away, and ends up falling into Mary and Roz’s room, because Mary still hasn’t learned to lock the door when she’s naked. With Roz. And Joe. And the Squad 48 girls. Billie flees the dorm, past Agatha and Asma who are making out behind the front desk, and manages to catch a bus home. When she stumbles through her front door, Mike is there. Just staring at her. And fucking her mom.Billie wakes up screaming. It’s morning. She’s lying on her bed in her dorm room, amidst empty bottles. Sal is alone in the other bed, flipping her off. “Thank fuckin’ God, it was just a nightmare,” Billie says.
Camera pans over and zooms in. There’s a nickel on her nightstand.
Fade to black.
Holy shit. That’s epic.
You are awesome.
I’m still expecting lesbian Friday.
If the next comic is some OTHER characters and we are left hanging on whether or not Ethan is going to actually go through with it and tell Joyce, I think I just might scream and annoy my neighbor.
I can just imagine him going in and looking at her FACE and not being able to spit it out and then Amber has to confront him about it AGAIN.
She won’t need to confront him, she’ll be standing behind him, watching silently. Her wrathful gaze burning a hole in his back.
Good point! I sure hope you’re right. This has gone on long enough!
Tomorow we’ll cut to Sal and Marcy making out all licky face style. Four silent panels of hot girl on girl action :p
And the fandom will have no idea whether to complain about the lack of conclusion to the Ethan storyline or not, sending them into spasms.
It is now tomorrow and things are not resolved. Cue fandom spasms!
Everytime I see your gravatar, I think:
“And now… Kiss!”
“But what if I am an awful jackass buttface, what then?”
“I have a friend named Amazi-girl that DEALS with awful jackass buttfaces”
Ethan: “Here’s the deal, I will come out of the closet…again, if you come out of the phonebooth.”
*He then looks down to see that Amber has disappeared, Batman style and you see a blue cape on a rooftop leaving the scene.*
That would make a good line if he knew her secret.
Yesterday’s comic subtly implies he may.
Subtly? That was about as subtle as painting the words on her face in rainbow colors!
So pretty subtle then?
He implied in the previous strip that he does.
She has a… powerful friend.
Ethan would rather pay for something he already owns than to confess for something. Immersion ruined. College students would punt a baby before they spend money.
Says you! I’m broke for a reason, man!
But if he already has Netflix it doesn’t cost him anything to watch them. Right?
I don’t know how netflix works. *Sits in my rocking chair chewing tobacco and shaking my fist at the neighborhood kids*
Unlimited streaming for movies/shows Netflix has the rights to, $8 a month.
Basically if your family already has an account and you know the log-in stuff there’s nothing stopping you. Except other family members looking in the recently watched section and going “Who was watching Dinosaur Train and Chinatown?” or the like. Multiple people watching stuff on it with wildly different tastes can get some really bizarre recommendation combos.
Well, someone’s paying for that subscription. I dunno if it’s Ethan or his parents or what but someone’s paying.
You misunderstand – college students punt babies because it’s fun.
Pssh, Amber it’s all about blu ray these days anyway
Is Amber even old enough to realize it’s the future?
I think she’s about my age, so she should have childhood memories of VHS tapes, and having to buy DVD seasons. And cell phones that flipped up.
I’m old enough to realize it’s the future and I’m the same age as her. Keep in mind that Amber probably grew up with VCR just like me so…this is like…double future already.
Pfffft, some future, iPads and online movies are no subsitute for proton energy pills and hover-boards.
Back 2 the future lied to us. Where is my damn hoverboard!!!
Stolen! by Martians! from the Moon!
Stolen! by Martys from McFly!
I want the autoshoes.
Power Laces Kickstarter
Thirding the “I have VHSes what sort of black magic are these funky discs” thing.
Man, when I was 16 and logging onto BBSes with a friggin’ dial-up modem that cut out if you pick up the phone I thought it was the future.
Is…is a BBS some ancient version of Black Berry Messenger?
Finally! My time to shine!
A BBS stands for “Bulletin Board System” basically, back before the Internet was popular, people ran dial up programs on their computers that accepted incoming calls from people on modems (we’re talking 1200bps, etc).
They would talk on message forums, play horribly sexist but ‘teh best thing evar’ at the time Legend of the Red Dragon (among other games), and basically it was a pre-form of Internet.
In San Diego, where I grew up, there was a directory of hundreds of bulletin boards. Some of them were up all the time, some could handle MULTIPLE USERS. Some games even allowed for interaction with OTHER BULLETIN BOARDS as things got fancy. A whole sub-culture built up, parallel at the time to MUDs and the like.
Howerver, as the Internet grew in prevalence, Bulletin Boards fell to the wayside. There’s still a handful out there, running outdated software via emulators and allowing telnet (or SSH) connections via hacks and mods. But the era of the BBS is long behind us.
[CrankyOldMan] 1200bps?! Why in MY day, we used a 300 Baud modem on an HP Teletype to play NetTrek* and WE LIKED IT. [/COM]
* and wasted rolls and rolls of paper while doing it. “Monitor”? WTF is a monitor?
Grandpa tell us more!!!
memories of the boards shutting down access to the 300 baud users still brings back nightmares.
Pshaw, silly youngling. In MY day, we used a telegraph to play chess.
Damn, I still remember setting up and running a BBS on a II+ and then migrating to a GS to run Hot Metal and a bank of 20 meg HHDs.
Are you Amber’s adviser?
It was. And it was AMAZING.
Any new technology is the future; just ask anyone conquered by the Assyrians.
I’m younger than her and I still remember VCRs.
You people keep reminding me that these characters are young enough to be my kids.
“Oh. Right. This is the Future.”
….
*gasp*
Amazi-girl is a time-traveller!
From the past no less. Wonder what era?
I’d think it would be obvious, given that the girl she’s rooming with is half-dinosaur.
Willis only made this comic to make people realize that Beast Wars was available on Netflix, didn’t he.
Pretty much.
No, he did it to do that and to delay the conflict between Joyce and Jerkass. Thats how you can tell David is good at this webcomic thing.
Can’t it be both?
Well, I was headed on over to Netflix after catching up here anyways, so I guess I can finally go see what this “Beast Wars” thing is! Thanks Ethan!
It is good, that’s what it is.
Hmm. Watched the first one. That vintage ’96 TV computer animation is a little… hard to look at for long. Does the story go interesting places (say, Babylon 5 style)? If it just sticks to basic kids-level storytelling, it won’t be worth the eye strain.
Ethan doesn’t care if Beast Wars DVDs get destroyed?! Does he know what some of us woulod do to own Beats wars DVDs!?
The rage makes me incapable of spelling properly.
Like everyone else on the internet!
Exactly like everyone on the Internet. We should own up and call it Ragenet.
Or… has someone already patented that? God, that thought… well, you know.
Grrr.
Beats Wars is the porno version of Beast Wars
Man, what sort of shit DVDs does Ethan have? No commentary tracks or deleted scenes worth preserving? Animatics? Not even a making-of featurette?
Maybe they’re bootlegged. I wouldn’t hold it against them.
Well, the Kid Rhino DVD sets of Beast Wars didn’t really have much on them. Frankly, you can find what few special features they had on YouTube.
Are the Shout Factory releases worth getting? Anyone know?
Probably. I don’t own them, but probably.
…man, Rhino and Shout just get all the nerd licenses, don’t they?
As a college student myself, I can safely say that Amber probably doesn’t even OWN a hammer.
She was speaking metaphorically or her HAMMERS OF JUSTICE.
The hammer is her penis?
+1
Why didn’t she tell Ethan that on Prom Night?
My wonderful me-ness
My hammer, the peeeeeople can tell
That I’m awfully swell
She would buy one just for the occasion. Maybe rent it.
Speak for yourself. My father gave me a fully equipped tool kit when I went to college. Not that I’m good at home repairs, just in the off chance that I might need it. I think I had to use a wrench once or twice on a leaky faucet.
I own a fully stocked toolbox. And it’s not even my residence hall.
Yes, but have you opened it and used those strange looking doodads inside?
“Awful jackass buttface…wonderful. Now, if he just tells her tomorrow…
I too remember dialup BB’s. And my Leading Edge IbM clone with 2 floppy disk drives: one drive to put game on, and one drive to ‘save it’, as it had no hard drive. 2500 bucks for the computer and an extra $800 for the hard drive. I scrapped up 25k, but that final 800 just too much.
Yup it’s the future. My current pc costs the same as the LE and measures its HD in TB. My smart phone has more legs than that LE did. But, damn, it rocked back in 1984.
And yes I would not mind having Beast Wars on dvd, not at all.
edit button aggg…obviously not 25k
Pfft- future smuture, when the future gives us those fancy Jetson clothes, then give me a call, but till then I’m gonna rewatch my Power Rangers season 1 on VHS damnit!
Philistine, Betamax first and always …… *snerk* … and that should be Voltron….
I won’t be surprised if Joyce is somehow relieved to have a “boyfriend” that keeps her safe from premarital hanky panky.
However, he will not be able to provide her with post-marital hanky panky. Also he may hanky pank other dudes.
That’s true, but she may think she can “fix” that part of him. Seen the movie Saved! ?
Last time homosexuality was brought up to her she showed no signs of thinking they can be ‘fixed’ and simply says it’s a sin. Being an atheist is a sin and she’s best friends with one now.
It’s a common belief among conservative/fundamentalist Evangelicals that homosexuality is either a choice, or a test of faith and obedience from God. The idea of “sin” generally implies some level of choice, unless one is a strict Calvinist. The idea of homosexual behavior as a sin virtually requires that aspect of free choice to be present in order to not lead into some very undesirable theological positions. Fundamentalists insist on this not because they want to hate homosexuals (although certainly some do), but to protect the idea that a just and loving God is compatible with scripture forbidding homosexual acts. In some way or another, Joyce will have to confront and resolve this, if she is not oblivious to it altogether.
Do Calvinists play Calvinball?
If they do, its not by their own choice.
They’d have to change the rules to “do whatever God preordained for you.” That soundsa lot less fun.
Ethan lied about being straight and as soon as he’s outed he’ll probably admit he doesn’t really want to be Joyce’s boyfriend.
Joyce hates liars so much her speech turns black when talking about them, and as far as I can tell the only reason she’s even in college is to find a husband. I’d say the disappointment here is going to be catastrophic. Even if she weren’t a Christian with hangups about homosexuality, this is a pretty condemning setup for Ethan.
Even if she accepts Ethan as a gay man, Ethan is kind of spineless. He cannot set up or enforce the kind of boundaries that allow Joyce to be friends with Dorothy, and without them, it seems like it’s fairly difficult for anyone to truly enjoy spending time with Joyce.
This is true. And I expect Joyce to be hurt or angry in any case. But this story has also just finished driving home for us all of the things Joyce is struggling with that she will (at least temporarily) no longer have to worry about once Ethan comes out. So I expect there to be some sense of releif as well. So the question is what outcome sets up the most potential for humor and future story development.
Because not having a boyfriend will totally stop Joyce from being horney. Just because the guy will change doesn’t mean her emotional situation will. She’s actively on the manhunt after all.
When I say she won’t have to worry, I mean it in the sense that her opportunity and immediate temptation to act on those desires will be temporarily removed… not that trying to act on them would’ve been very successful at this point, but Joyce doesn’t know that yet.
I feel like this is bad character development, like a not a great plotline, because Ethan’s not making this choice himself. It’s being foisted on him. Your MC’s always supposed to be the game-changer himself!
Ethan’s not really a Main Character (that’s what your MC stood for, right?) and he did change the game by creating this situation. His choices have created these consequences.
He’s… not? I thought they all took turns being the stars of the show.
I’d say Ethan’s more of a secondary character, good enough for his own subplots but not really the focus of the story.
Ethan’s a main character over in Shortpacked!. Here… to the best of my recollection, he hasn’t appeared at all outside the setup for this plotline. Even Dina has more going on than he does.
I can think of lots of protagonists who had to be forced into acting like they had a spine before they could actually grow one. Besides, it’s not really character “development” if the character is always the one changing the world and never the one being changed by it.
It doesn’t have to be development into a good person to be good character development, though. He created this situation himself, and in doing so showed himself to be in a vulnerable enough position that he’s willing to ignore a pretty major aspect of him if it makes it possible for him to fit in and be a part of the hang-out — that may have changed him further as a person if Amber hadn’t stopped him when she did (isn’t stopping him…now. Dang weird temporal grammar). This is just Amber doing damage control (and in doing so, establishing herself as much more assertive than we know her as in previous versions, which is character elaboration — I’m not sure about calling it development — for Amber and so on).
Plus, the choice is still up to him when he goes in there. He can say it, he can not say it, he can say a much more minor reveal, he can go crazy and jump out the window, etc.
But he is.
Amber, I totally agree that Ethan needs to come clear to Joyce. But… maybe not in the middle of a restaurant while surrounded by their mutual friends? Maybe that’s not a good place for that?
Especially not immediately after his not-girlfriend returned from the bathroom embarrassed and near tears! This has trouble written- NO!
This has Trouble stamped all over it.
I wonder if using the rainbow ink on the stamp will just make the wound sting more for Joyce or if it is meant to warn her…
I wonder if she’ll think that kiss turned him gay.
Ya got Trouble with a capital T and that rhymes with P and that stands for Pool
Amber’s been surprisingly courteous to him, I’m impressed.
Well-reasoned. Atta girl!
Ah yes, the old jackass buttface argument, many a schoolyard battle has been won with that line
And followed right after his confession, a text message from Mike that merely reads, “I told you so.”
To Ethan or Joyce?
To their mama…and for only a nickel…
‘mama’? So only one person then? Ethan and Joyce are clearly long lost siblings.
Sure… why not?
*Checks Latin America Netflix*
*finds beasts wars is unavailable here*
*stars sobbing*
*Checks Latin America Netflix*
*finds beasts wars is unavailable here*
*starts sobbing*
Have you tried changing your location code?
This is the correct argument. I’m glad.
So…this’ll probably spread, now. Either he announces it to everyone or he says it to only Joyce and she spreads it in her shock (á la “You’re GAY!?”)
Dorothy and Dina seem like they wouldn’t mind. (Dina might not realize why some people would mind. Then again, looking at social structures, she may have come across the whole ‘certain sexual orientations carry a negative stigma’ thing.) Danny hardly knows Ethan, so he wouldn’t have any form of reaction either way (except maybe “oh, is this that gay guy you were dating?”) Walky is a bit more childish in this version and seems to follow a man code which might be opposed to the whole homosexual thing, but on the other hand he’s been shown to be pretty clever and may actually be childish enough to only judge a person by if they like Nachitos and cartoons.
Basically, it seems like the only person to have a strong reaction to this will be Joyce.
The others may have a strong reaction to Ethan lieing to Joyce and using her as a beard.
Oh yeah, that’s true. Dorothy already knew something was up, but yeah.
Instead of “Netflix” you should have gone with “This is the Future”/
“Oh, right. This is the future.”
I should say that more often.
Awesome moment.
But I think it’s gonna go poorly. Some people have expressed the possibility of Joyce trying to convert Ethan to heterosexuality, but, I have a different guess:
She just saw another girl showing up to “steal” her boyfriend. And we’ve seen her decry as ridiculous the idea that Ethan is gay before. Maybe she’ll assume evil, manipulative Amber is forcing her twue wuv Ethan to lie so she can keep him for herself?
Oh no… if this prediction is correct, Amber will become the Sal of distant past, while Ethan will become the new Danny. orz
I’m still rooting for Ethan/Joyce. There’s so much going against them.
Ha you poor dear, Willis will never allow it
Oh. This means when he tells her, it’ll be a Friday. And end on a cliffhanger note for two days.
DAMN YOU WILLIS!!
Money says Joyce accuses Amber of being a witch and casting a spell on Ethan to make him gay after he tells her that he’s gay.
Shits about to get real
ETHAN!
YOU GO IN THERE RIGHT NOW AND MAKE THAT OTHER GIRL FEEL AS BAD AS I DO THAT I CANT CONTROL YOUR SEXUALITY!!!
Because it’s not like her boyfriend not being attracted to her has already made Joyce feel bad! …oh wait.
I like very much that you have an Ethan gravatar. It makes it three times more hilarious.
HOORAY FOR THE FUTURE!
… it is the future, and yet Ethan reads the newspaper.
Maybe by “reads the newspaper”, Ethan means “follows the IDS on Twitter“.
ETHAN!! Even though you just told me, YOUR BEST FRIEND how you want to be feel free of your own sexuality, YOU GO IN THERE RIGHT NOW AND BRING UP YOUR SEXUALITY!!
totally SMH here at the thought of having to discuss your sexuality based on what,when,how others feel you should do this. Man just told Amber how he feels about it and her first response is “TOUGH SHIT HOW YOU FEEL, GO TELL HER NOW” !?!?!?!
Just cause she’s all butthurt he came out when he did, she’s now gonna make sure everyone knows he’s “GAY” and nothing else? o_0
This isn’t just about how he feels about it, it’s also about misleading Joyce.
Yeah. The girl thinks they’re going to get married some day for pete’s sake.
Silly Joyce, God wants you to be a nun.
His own damned fault for lieing to her and leading her on. You can not let your sexuality define you without using an unsuspecting and hopeful woman as your beard. All he had to do was not talk about it and just be geeky, like he seems to want.
yeah, but it’s totes not Amber’s right to tell him when and how to do this, or even if he has to. I almost want to say, “since when is lying wrong,” since I’ve never seen a decent argument against it outside certain texts, but I won’t go down that path. If something makes him happy-er, isn’t that his business? Who says he “has” to do anything? Where are we getting this “right and wrong” anyway?
Teeechnically I agree with timemonkey, but I totes can’t stand Amber yelling at people and ordering them around–especially people she hasn’t bothered to talk to for a while. I kiiiinda wanna punch her in the face for being a rude mo’fo with no class, compassion, or respect. (I’m a girl so that’s okay, right?) There’s a kind way to tell someone they’re wrong.
This is not it. This is the way fundamentalists convert you and jerks overbear you.
You see, Petre, this lie is not about Ethan anymore. It is about Joyce. In the end, she will be the one hurt by Ethan’s lie. And the longer it takes for her to know the truth, the worse will be latter.
So, yeah, it is totally in Amber’s position, as a friend, to yell at Ethan and tell him he is being a complete asshole. Ethan decision to whether or not to lie would be fine if it was only about him. But it is not, so he have to stop.
That doesn’t mean there isn’t a better time and place then “right now”.
If not now, then when? After they start making out? After she tells her parents about him? After their first kiss and he calls her his girlfriend – oh wait. The right time was when he could tell she was getting ideas about them. The right time was not making the decision to lie. The longer he waits now, the worse it will be.
I agree that he should do it in private, but there is going to be no good way to break this news. I’m concerned that if he doesn’t do it right now this second, then he’ll rationalize and procrastinate because it isn’t a good time.
He is going to hurt her. Nothing he can do now but try to minimize it by getting it over with.
He needs to dump her right now, but he doesn’t need to tell her he’s gay right now, or ever.
I mean, there’s always this approach: “Uh Joyce? I was just talking to my ex-girlfriend, and after hugging her I realized that I wouldn’t marry you if you were the last woman on earth. So I’ll just pick up the tab for tonight’s pizza (and subs) and we’ll call it good, okay?”
What could possibly go wrong?
Joyce will probably stab all the things, but better to get it over with now.
Like so many others have said, he doesn’t have to come out to her to tell her he doesn’t want to marry her.
It IS slightly complicated by him having just called her his girlfriend though. I don’t envy him the conversation.
Which is not quite the same thing as having sympathy for him right now. I understand his confusion, his frustration, his exhaustion — but the part where he’s led Joyce on deliberately is just unnecessary. GO SIT IN THE CORNER, ETHAN, AND THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU’VE DONE
oh wait you’re eighteen
I think part of why teenagers are — comparatively! — self-centered is because when you’re a teen, everything seems so BIG and so SERIOUS and so IMPORTANT all the time. Just existing can feel exhausting, and at the same time when you’re feeling overwhelmed, you’re surrounded by adults who just smile fondly and shake their heads over everything you say, because they’re remembering their own teenage years through a filter of nostalgia, embarrassment, and self-deprecation. So no one ELSE takes you seriously.
Bleh.
This is not going to go well. But it may cause Joyce to reevaluate her stance on gays ———- nah it won’t —- she will make it her mission to “turn” him back to “normal”.
Or to murder him for lying to her and trying to deceive her out of her happy marriage. Better hide the glasses.
Shameless product placement in Panel 3.
Wait, what’s in Amber’s hair? Tears? It wasn’t there in the last strip.
Amber mispronounced it. It’s pronounced THE FUUUTUUURE.
I felt this was necessary. I can’t explain why.
http://www.herecomesyourdan.com/temp/dumbingoftime.png
I like this.
Haha. Appealing to his better nature because the BLACKMAIL failed.
Am I the only one who got the impression from the fourth panel that Amber is a time traveler?
I wonder sometimes if we would be better off or worse off if we had to announce our sexuality when we met someone. you know:
“Hi, pleasure to meet you I’m mouse and I prefer to have sex with members of my own species.”
What, not a practitioner of rishantra then?
Ringworld reference! Yay!
‘Hi Joyce, I’m Ethan and would like to be hated and oppressed by a disturbingly large segment of the population, including you! By the way, I also don’t want to be defined by my sexual preference, so let’s talk about transformers or batman. Both of which I would also bone given half the chance and a lot of lube. So yeah, homosexual, robosexual, and megachiropterexual. And how’s your day been?”
So what you’re saying is that Ratbat is Ethan’s perfect man.
Well, this is shaping up to be an epic Friday. Although I have the sneaking suspicion Joyce will be more concerned with Ethan being Jewish than being gay. Or she knew all along, and thinks her love can cure him.
She was okay with Joe being gay. The problem was his heterosexuality.
*facepalm*. She was okay with Joe being Jewish. The two are different things and not interchangeable. Stupid brain.
Sarah told Joyce that Siegal is a Jewish name when Joyce first met him and was fantasizing about being Mrs. Siegal.
You tell him, Amber! I like Ethan but he needs to stop lying to Joyce.
Unrelated note- my only teeny tiny beef with this comic (that is AWESOME and I love it) is that there are so many practicing Christians (re: the comic where a bunch of people head off to church) and yet the only two Jews don’t seem to practice at all. I just wish that there were some practicing Jews around, is all. Just a tiny complaint. Carry on.
You sure you want somebody who isn’t Jewish and hasn’t grown up practicing Judaism, writing characters qrowing up as practicing Jews? Not to disparage Willis’s writing ability, but that’s sort of asking for trouble. Loopy reality-denying christians, he knows.
Well, perhaps just an off screen mention that someone went to shabbat? All I’m saying is that it’s kind of a bummer that the only two in the series don’t seem to practice at all.
This is the future where I can watch all my favorite TV shows on the computer with little to no interruption and watch as people whine in the comments section about the next season not being out.
And now Beast Wars is no longer on Netflix. The future is cruel.