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Welcome to the saga of the working-class adventurer! Enjoy the complete story with new annotations daily!
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Well, they did leave a sequel hook in the season 4 finale, and the Ape Wars episodes had already been spread out over the previous season and a half, so I wasn’t surprised it came back.
I mean, waiting almost two full seasons to do so was weird, but… *shrugs*
Vendor Defender. I mean, the concept of Monkey Master trying to save the banana stand was good and all, but they turned Grumpy Banana Stand Guy into an enthusiastic yet incompetent moron. The grumpiness was his charm!
That and that one episode with the two psycho teenagers with the science project. You know the one. With the robot.
I mean, the school episodes were hit-and-miss at best, but that one just sucked! Also, D&MM were barely in it! Having Dexter’s annoying nephew be the lead in that one was the worst way they could’ve gone about it.
I mean, the psycho teens had some good moments early on, but it became a cliche storm of crap once they unleashed their creation.
Speaking of D.A.N., it really was funny at first the way they avoided giving him an actual name. I think my favorite dialogue tease was:
Dexter: Nephew, get over here!
D.A.N.: My name is-
Dexter: I know your name! Now shut up and listen.
But really, once they started giving him episodes, it got annoying how they wrote around his not having a name, but never addressed it. Not that that was the only thing wrong with his episodes, mind you, the kid was annoying as hell, and even whinier than Shinji…
I like how the spin-off comics stuck him back in a purely supporting role with his comments being instantly dismissed or him being literally shoved off-panel by the characters.
“Kind of bad”? It was terrible! One of the worst episodes of the already bad season 5!
It’s a shame, too, because the Sensitive Scanner shorting out and malfunctioning had a lot of potential! At least they did it well in the spin-off comics (the ones based on the show, not the original “Head Alien” comics).
I’m pretty sure you mean “Rage Ape”. I know the promos said “Rage Monkey”, but the title card for the episode itself said “Rage Ape”, so I go with that.
Reading all the posts replying to this one. I truly can’t believe how far this joke went. People were arguing and making fake seasonal arcs at one point.
…go back and read the comments on the strip where Leslie calls “Taxing Taxonomy” the best D&MM episode.
While caught up in that wave of creativity, I volunteered to write mini-synopses for every episode named. As a man of my word, I’m stuck with that task, as even more and more episodes are being added.
Nah, the larger the herd the better off Bronies are. Generally speaking, large Brony herds provide better safety for Bronies as well as higher quality viewing parties. Now, if your herd gets too large that can lead to issues, but predation usually takes care of the young, the weak and the marginal Bronies who like the show but just aren’t willing to commit to purchasing a Pinkie Pie hoodie.
Yeah. Having the brainwashed enjoy what you enjoy makes you suspect your own brain may be a tad cleaner than you once thought it was. Or something like… er …
Let me try again.
If Walky wants to wear pajama jeans and butt-taco shirts, it’s pretty clear he values an unwashed brain.
Dammit! That still isn’t it. Wait, wait, I got it:
The idea what they like is also pleasing to a clean brain is horrible to those who enjoy a filthy…
Yeah, but… Joyce has gotten comfortable, sitting down in front of the computer/TV/video device thingie and has even lost the sweater-vest, while Ethan and Walky are still just kind of… standing there. Walky’s even still got his hoodie (and bad hair) on.
Couldn’t they just have stood up first? You know, in preparation of Joyce leaving and the D&MM-watching being over? Since they weren’t planning to watch another one and all?
But you don’t understand. Since Joyce took her vest off, Walkie couldn’t possibly take his hoodie off, because doing so might mean his brain had also been hosed down. Maybe even gotten a light loofahing. And Walky can’t have that, because his mind must be soiled.
Apparently, I need to Netflix the Dexter and Monkey Master series. (Or not, so as to avoid losing my job! I totally binged on the archives of It’s Walky and Shortpacked, when I first discovered them, and it was like signing whole days of my life away . . . )
Ah, did that archive binge as well after avoiding the Walky for so long (About 8 years. O_o) Seems to happen with all the webcomics I read.*goes back to his Whovian binge*
Know how there’s that pic with the angry kid playing chess and it says “Stop liking what I don’t like!”?
I’ve always wanted to photoshop a fedora on his head, thick-framed glasses on his face, and a Pabst Blue Ribbon in his hand and change the caption to “Stop liking what I like!”
Dexter is *adorable*? Did they tone him way down from the comic then? ‘Cause in there he is adorable for maybe the first little bit, but then turns very un-adorable
Wrll, to yell with you too, walky! You barge into joyce and athen time with a way to wat ch a show after you were a figgin jerk to joyce and then you say s’no good no more after she likes it so much! well to hell with you too! just be happy she likes it! you converted someone!
It’s the 4th… or th3 5. or something. look, it’s a holdiay. I’m drunk commenting on dumbing of age. Because i love this strip. despite it making me SUPER DUPER ANGRY a lot. but that’s because of the feels, m an. Because of THE FEELSD. The strip makes me FEEL THINGS. And it’s got its hooks in me SO BAD that I have to check when it’s past 11 pm central time because i cannot wait til morning to read it. so sorry for the many numerous mistypings.
Happy 4th, people! Happy dumbing of age! woooooooo!
Hmmmm, now that I’m awake and sober this comment is as embarrassing as I feared it’d be when I awoke.
It does seem funnier in a Texan accent, sure. However, don’t really have a trace of accent myself. I’ve been confused as being from New York and have been called a “damn yankee” before by Texans with thick southern accents, though. I’ve never even been to New York!
I too grew up in Texas, but I was one of those people like Faye in Questionable Content, where I actively tried to eschew my native accent. I think the result is that I used a variety of actors on TV as a basis for “not having an accent”, and might’ve wound up with a vaguely Canadian accent? Or so I’ve been told.
Hmm. Sometime between -WHAP- and “Miss Rapture Ready”, Joyce lost the band-aid, too. I’m choosing to believe that she got so hot thinking about Ethan’s bod that it spontaneously combusted.
Time to face up to it, Walkerton. Like it or not, you’ve just been given proof that as much as you ridiculed Joyce, your brain has at least been vacuumed at some point. Or perhaps steam-cleaned. Or, if it was simply washed like hers, possibly dried on a fluff setting, too.
<Looks at the above. Still don’t think I nailed it.
Oh, you mean Орангутанг босса и шлем? Yeah. I tried to watch it once, but the animation was kind of wonky and the only subtitles I had were Welsh for some reason.
This why gays make great boyfriends. They literally just want to see you happy.
And then they cheat on you with a guy but, hey, YOU’RE the one dating a gay guy.
Ah, the archive marathon. The cool thing is the continuity, especially with weekly comics. ‘Derelict’ did weird things to me, though. (soon some of you will lose a weekend to Derelict–bwahahaha)
Also David Willis has several other comics from which these characters come. I had no idea until I stumbled upon the Wikipedia article on him. You are not done. You are never done, the webcomic universe is vast, and will swallow you.
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btw if you're one of those rando bluesky weirdos who doesn't know me but sees me in the wild being sarcastic and don't know i'm being sarcastic because you haven't taken like 30 seconds to, like, maybe look at my user profile or something, keep walking, you're not going to score internet points here
Here's an entertaining cite at the bottom of the first page
Josh Gerstein@joshgerstein.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
JUST IN: Milwaukee Judge Hannah Dugan moves to dismiss federal criminal case against her for allegedly helping immigrant hide from ICE. Her lawyers say she's protected by official acts & judicial immunity and 10th Amendment. Doc: storage.courtlistener.com/recap/gov.us...
Where did Hollywood go so wrong? I thought movies were supposed to be an escape from reality, a chance to put your worries aside and not have to think about any underlying ideas or concepts. Well, not anymore.
theonion.com/you-can...
It's not a new argument, of course, but Chesterton dismissed it effectively in 1908.
"You will hear everlastingly... this argument that the rich man cannot be bribed. The fact is, of course, that the rich man is bribed; he has been bribed already. That is why he is a rich man."
Aaron Rupar@atrupar.com ⋅ 2d
Hawley dismisses Trump lining his pockets with his memecoin: "Listen, I think nobody believes that Donald Trump can be bought. I mean, what does Donald Trump need more money for?"
wilbur, savvy enough to know he's in a comic strip but still not a great actor, awkwardly lifts a muffin up into frame so that we, the audience, understand that he has a muffin right now, which is very important narratively, but he's not really selling it well as an organic, human action
confirming that the reason there's been no Galaxy Version female characters in Blokees until now is that they felt they needed to make Round Lady Thighs For Ladies
preternia @preternia.com ⋅ 14h
Josh Gerstein @joshgerstein.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
Aaron Rupar @atrupar.com ⋅ 2d
Pavel
@spavel.bsky.social ⋅ 11d
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Walky also speaks to me.
Do you hear the Walky singing?
He has the voice of Barry Manilow….somehow.
On loan, or did he buy it?
He keeps it in a jar on his desk, next to the heart of a little boy he borrowed from Stephen King.
Singing the song of angry hipsters…
It is the music of a people who will not enjoy anything if it’s popular…
When the beating of the drum is the same for everyone.
Well right now Walky is speaking to his penis
Really? I thought he was looking at Ethan’s ass.
Why can’t it be both? :$
Hahahahahha
Walky, stop making me hate you.
He’s learning from Danny |=(
Danny is still worse though :/
Quick, show her some bad episodes!
Ah, who am I kidding, there ARE no bad episodes of Dexter and Monkey Master!
Aren’t there? Aren’t there really?
Well you can argue it got really hit and miss during the 6th season but come on, you start running out of ideas eventually!
Wasn’t season six the one that ended off really well? Or was that another one?
The season 6 finale was pretty good, yeah. But the bulk of it was all over the place.
It always feels weird when the first episode of a show that you watch is the last of a season.
Season Six’s finale was PHENOMENAL. I’m not gonna lie, I cried at the end.
Yeah, it wrapped up the Ape Wars arc. Which is weird considering that the season 4 finale was supposed to be the end of the Ape Wars arc.
Well, they did leave a sequel hook in the season 4 finale, and the Ape Wars episodes had already been spread out over the previous season and a half, so I wasn’t surprised it came back.
I mean, waiting almost two full seasons to do so was weird, but… *shrugs*
Yeah, Ape Wars run through seasons 3 and 4 with filler episodes filling up in between the important ones.
I wouldn’t call the others “filler” since they’re the bulk of the seasons, and often excellent anyway…
It’s not like that story took place all at once anyway. Certainly other unrelated stuff happened between them.
Is that when the strap wings and a ram rocket on MM and declare him Prince of the Positronicians?
Vendor Defender. I mean, the concept of Monkey Master trying to save the banana stand was good and all, but they turned Grumpy Banana Stand Guy into an enthusiastic yet incompetent moron. The grumpiness was his charm!
That and that one episode with the two psycho teenagers with the science project. You know the one. With the robot.
Oh yeah, “Mechamaniacs”…
I mean, the school episodes were hit-and-miss at best, but that one just sucked! Also, D&MM were barely in it! Having Dexter’s annoying nephew be the lead in that one was the worst way they could’ve gone about it.
I mean, the psycho teens had some good moments early on, but it became a cliche storm of crap once they unleashed their creation.
Speaking of D.A.N., it really was funny at first the way they avoided giving him an actual name. I think my favorite dialogue tease was:
Dexter: Nephew, get over here!
D.A.N.: My name is-
Dexter: I know your name! Now shut up and listen.
But really, once they started giving him episodes, it got annoying how they wrote around his not having a name, but never addressed it. Not that that was the only thing wrong with his episodes, mind you, the kid was annoying as hell, and even whinier than Shinji…
I like how the spin-off comics stuck him back in a purely supporting role with his comments being instantly dismissed or him being literally shoved off-panel by the characters.
Why is it every time someone mentions banana stands all I can think of is Girl Bravo?
There’s always money in the banana stand.
Two Words: “Ape Bait”.
Notice they never show that one in reruns.
Almost all of the episodes in season 5.
Very true. But, fortunately the good ones in that season are some of the show’s best.
That episode where the janitor spills his mop bucket and Sensitive Scanner gets shorted out was kind of bad.
“Kind of bad”? It was terrible! One of the worst episodes of the already bad season 5!
It’s a shame, too, because the Sensitive Scanner shorting out and malfunctioning had a lot of potential! At least they did it well in the spin-off comics (the ones based on the show, not the original “Head Alien” comics).
“Merry Monkeymas” was pretty terrible, actually. I think they just stopped trying to make Christmas specials after that.
Hey, I really liked “… And An Apey New Year!” It’s definitely the best of the Christmas episodes- which, admittedly, is faint praise.
“Twas the Brawl before Christmas” was pretty good. Too bad it was not canon.
And remember, there’s always “Rage Monkey.” No matter how hard we try to forget.
Don’t you mean “Rage Ape”?
Rage Monkey. That is all.
I’m pretty sure you mean “Rage Ape”. I know the promos said “Rage Monkey”, but the title card for the episode itself said “Rage Ape”, so I go with that.
Reading all the posts replying to this one. I truly can’t believe how far this joke went. People were arguing and making fake seasonal arcs at one point.
Just, yikes people.
…go back and read the comments on the strip where Leslie calls “Taxing Taxonomy” the best D&MM episode.
While caught up in that wave of creativity, I volunteered to write mini-synopses for every episode named. As a man of my word, I’m stuck with that task, as even more and more episodes are being added.
Ahem. Season 8.
Geez, you threaten to take people’s femurs ONE TIME, and suddenly you’re the bad guy.
She acts as if she needs them to live or something.
You can get new ones for a nickel, anyways.
But your mother needs her femurs to live!
Mike will give your mom another bone.
I doubt that bone would allow her to live or even walk again though.
In fact it may make those situations worse!
If she needs help to walk, she can hold onto mike’s guard rail.
Which he’ll fix with Joyce’s penis.
Walky isn’t a hipster, is he?
No, he’s just acting like one. Y’know, once the “sheeple” start liking something you thought was cool, then it’s not cool any more.
Would that mean that bronys would stop being bronys if MLP became mainstream?
Nah, the larger the herd the better off Bronies are. Generally speaking, large Brony herds provide better safety for Bronies as well as higher quality viewing parties. Now, if your herd gets too large that can lead to issues, but predation usually takes care of the young, the weak and the marginal Bronies who like the show but just aren’t willing to commit to purchasing a Pinkie Pie hoodie.
^Sounds like the commentary on a wildlife show.
I APPROVE.
Are you implying that MLP isn’t mainstream?
YUP!
Man have I got news for you!
Yeah, this comic was so cool until all these posers started commenting on it. Now it’s so 200-late.
I hate that approach. Blech.
Nope, it’s not the “sheeple” it’s just Joyce.
Yeah. Having the brainwashed enjoy what you enjoy makes you suspect your own brain may be a tad cleaner than you once thought it was. Or something like… er …
Let me try again.
If Walky wants to wear pajama jeans and butt-taco shirts, it’s pretty clear he values an unwashed brain.
Dammit! That still isn’t it. Wait, wait, I got it:
The idea what they like is also pleasing to a clean brain is horrible to those who enjoy a filthy…
He’s on the slippery slope to becoming one *DUN DUN DUN*
Nah, he’s just absorbed the message that he’s not allowed to like anything that female teenagers like. Especially if they squee.
Have Walky and Ethan just been standing there for five hours watching Joyce watch D&MM?
Well, they were watching the show, too.
You can watch something you’ve seen before. ‘S not unheard of.
Yeah, but… Joyce has gotten comfortable, sitting down in front of the computer/TV/video device thingie and has even lost the sweater-vest, while Ethan and Walky are still just kind of… standing there. Walky’s even still got his hoodie (and bad hair) on.
I don’t always undress for my tv shows, especially if it’s somethin’ I’ve already seen.
I think he means that people probably wouldn’t be STANDING for that length of time. Lord knows my knee will give out if I did that.
Naw, I stand hoverin’ over people too. Eventually you forget how tired your legs are.
Couldn’t they just have stood up first? You know, in preparation of Joyce leaving and the D&MM-watching being over? Since they weren’t planning to watch another one and all?
I’d’a guessed that Walky’d take his hoodie off long before any clothes came off of Joyce.
But you don’t understand. Since Joyce took her vest off, Walkie couldn’t possibly take his hoodie off, because doing so might mean his brain had also been hosed down. Maybe even gotten a light loofahing. And Walky can’t have that, because his mind must be soiled.
It’s still missing something, isn’t it?
He was staring intently and gathering data on audience reception.
I think that the IT Walky is refering in the last panel to is his boner.
It’s dead… It can’t be saved now… This is the end for it. I’m so sorry.
I mean it perked up a bit when the sweater vest came off but if that’s as far as we’re going I just don’t think we can salvage it.
We leave the greiving to have time with the deceased.
Dotty will no longer get to enjoy her caramel injection anymore.
We can bring it back. We have the technology.
Better than it was before. Better, stronger, but unfortunately faster.
At least now it makes cool sounds when Walky activates it.
WHOOOOOSH!
Maximize?
That’s called the ultra-dudes who wear Tapout shirts effect.
Eh, friendships take time.
Apparently, I need to Netflix the Dexter and Monkey Master series. (Or not, so as to avoid losing my job! I totally binged on the archives of It’s Walky and Shortpacked, when I first discovered them, and it was like signing whole days of my life away . . . )
Do it! Give in! Who needs sleep?
+1
Ah, did that archive binge as well after avoiding the Walky for so long (About 8 years. O_o) Seems to happen with all the webcomics I read.*goes back to his Whovian binge*
Dammit, Walky, stop giving me reasons to hate you.
He’s a manchild. It wouldn’t be authentic if he wasn’t at least a little unlikeable, if not very unlikeable.
This, right here.
Fucking plebs ruin everything.
Know how there’s that pic with the angry kid playing chess and it says “Stop liking what I don’t like!”?
I’ve always wanted to photoshop a fedora on his head, thick-framed glasses on his face, and a Pabst Blue Ribbon in his hand and change the caption to “Stop liking what I like!”
DOOOOO IIIIIIT!
Hey… Hipsters aren’t the _only_ people who like PBR…
Don’t tell them that, they’ll stop drinking it! Then how will we know they’re hipsters after we torch their fedoras and fake glasses?
Beards.
Trucker caps.
Patchouli oil.
White-person dreadlocks.
“Ironic” clothing.
Neckerchiefs.
Etc.
Dude, fedoras are awesome. Especially if you are wearing a trench coat.
Nope, sorry. Fedoras have been ruined
but if you wear a fedora, due to the nature of hipsterism, you will be reclaiming it from the hipsters
Nah, you just have to make fedoras mainstream again.
Nope, it’s just Joyce.
…and Danny, and Mary.
You brought this on yourself, Walky.
This is so weird after reading “It’s Walky” and “Joyce and Walky!”
Damn Willis a few times. You’ll feel better immediately.
I know I did.
Hipsters: Another word for elitist douche.
Glad that Joyce will keep her femurs for awhile, she has enough problems without losing them.
Dexter is *adorable*? Did they tone him way down from the comic then? ‘Cause in there he is adorable for maybe the first little bit, but then turns very un-adorable
Well, he’s subjectively adorable.
Joyce always thought he was adorable!
http://www.itswalky.com/comic/the-cutest-little-vest/
Does anyone else see a very blue tint to this strip?
Well, it is supposed to be night time and the only light source in that room is the monitor….or something like that.
Vaguely, yes. I assumed it was a stylized choice to represent the glow of the screen, though.
Wrll, to yell with you too, walky! You barge into joyce and athen time with a way to wat ch a show after you were a figgin jerk to joyce and then you say s’no good no more after she likes it so much! well to hell with you too! just be happy she likes it! you converted someone!
It’s the 4th… or th3 5. or something. look, it’s a holdiay. I’m drunk commenting on dumbing of age. Because i love this strip. despite it making me SUPER DUPER ANGRY a lot. but that’s because of the feels, m an. Because of THE FEELSD. The strip makes me FEEL THINGS. And it’s got its hooks in me SO BAD that I have to check when it’s past 11 pm central time because i cannot wait til morning to read it. so sorry for the many numerous mistypings.
Happy 4th, people! Happy dumbing of age! woooooooo!
Go to bed, Texan.
Not gonna lie, I read your comment in a Southern acccent.
Hmmmm, now that I’m awake and sober this comment is as embarrassing as I feared it’d be when I awoke.
It does seem funnier in a Texan accent, sure. However, don’t really have a trace of accent myself. I’ve been confused as being from New York and have been called a “damn yankee” before by Texans with thick southern accents, though. I’ve never even been to New York!
I too grew up in Texas, but I was one of those people like Faye in Questionable Content, where I actively tried to eschew my native accent. I think the result is that I used a variety of actors on TV as a basis for “not having an accent”, and might’ve wound up with a vaguely Canadian accent? Or so I’ve been told.
Hmm. Sometime between -WHAP- and “Miss Rapture Ready”, Joyce lost the band-aid, too. I’m choosing to believe that she got so hot thinking about Ethan’s bod that it spontaneously combusted.
Time to face up to it, Walkerton. Like it or not, you’ve just been given proof that as much as you ridiculed Joyce, your brain has at least been vacuumed at some point. Or perhaps steam-cleaned. Or, if it was simply washed like hers, possibly dried on a fluff setting, too.
<Looks at the above. Still don’t think I nailed it.
Screwed up the code, too. Ah well.
RUINED FOREVER
(MONKEY MASTER NOT TRUCK MASTER)
Oh right, that knockoff. I mean, that is worse than the cheap Russian knockoff.
Oh, you mean Орангутанг босса и шлем? Yeah. I tried to watch it once, but the animation was kind of wonky and the only subtitles I had were Welsh for some reason.
Ethan’s always been pretty supportive (Remember Amber), but it seems like it’s not balanced out by social awkwardness in DoA. Neat!
Walky only has himself to blame. He set it up perfectly for beginners to love the show. Really he should have chosen the worst episodes.
Good point. He’s too good.
Personally I hate that look Monkey Master gives when he… it gives me the creeps.
This why gays make great boyfriends. They literally just want to see you happy.
And then they cheat on you with a guy but, hey, YOU’RE the one dating a gay guy.
Gay make great friends, but not boyfriends. They want to see you happy, but not make you happy.
Wink wink nudge nudge.
Good going Walky. You’ve ruined it for yourself.
Jeez I’ve just caught up, and I can say new favorite web comic!
Ah, the archive marathon. The cool thing is the continuity, especially with weekly comics. ‘Derelict’ did weird things to me, though. (soon some of you will lose a weekend to Derelict–bwahahaha)
Also David Willis has several other comics from which these characters come. I had no idea until I stumbled upon the Wikipedia article on him. You are not done. You are never done, the webcomic universe is vast, and will swallow you.
ONE MORE EPISODE!
*several episodes and a few hours later*
ONE MORE EPISODE!
“I’m just watching to know what you and Dorothy are talking about” she said, “I’m not investing myself” she said.
Ya’ll hear about that terrible accident in Hawaii with the hipster tourist?
Yeah, seems that he got into the lava before it was cool.
Thank you! I’m here all night!
Walky, for the love of everything holy, don’t say “I think it killed it for me” while looking at your pants (” )