Dumbing of Age Book Twelve

Dumbing of Age

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May 12, 2026

Casa De Marcie

by David M Willis on September 24, 2014 at 12:01 am
  • 01 - When Somebody Loved Me
└ Tags: linda, marcie, sal

Discussion (288) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. Jen Aside
    Jen Aside
    September 24, 2014 at 12:01 am | #

    SALLY HOW DARE YOU CLIMB THAT GIANT PLAYGROUND FACILITY DESIGNED FOR CHILDREN TO CLIMB YOU MIGHT BECOME STRONG AND INDEPENDENT AND SCALE BUILDINGS AS A MODE OF TRANSPORTATION

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      September 24, 2014 at 12:04 am | #

      To Linda’s credit, Sal may get hurt.

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        September 24, 2014 at 12:09 am | #

        Would she be as worried if it was Walky up there instead?

        • Doctor_Who
          Doctor_Who
          September 24, 2014 at 12:10 am | #

          She would praise his awesome climbing abilities.

          • Jen Aside
            Jen Aside
            September 24, 2014 at 2:28 am | #

            okay since I finally found this again, what are everyone’s thoughts on this playground, out of curiosity

            • beege
              beege
              September 24, 2014 at 2:44 am | #

              I read that article when it came out and thought it was excellent – and I think we need more playgrounds like it.

              As to the strip, I suspect this is more about how Mrs Walkerton relates to her daughter (you are always in the wrong) then honest concern for her safety.

              • Clif
                Clif
                September 24, 2014 at 11:32 pm | #

                And a big thank you to Jen Aside for the link!!!

            • Gadgeteer Smashwidget
              Gadgeteer Smashwidget
              September 24, 2014 at 3:07 am | #

              I love it. If I ever have kids, I hope there’ll be a Land-style playground near where I live.

              …and i really wish I could play on it now, actually.

            • Plasma Mongoose
              Plasma Mongoose
              September 24, 2014 at 3:41 am | #

              When I recall my own childhood and compare it to today’s overwatched kids, I kinda feel bad for them even though they have access to awesome video games.

            • Nogre
              Nogre
              September 24, 2014 at 4:07 am | #

              I feel like the fleeting mention of “doesn’t let him play many video games or watch much TV” was actually rather telling. It’s not just about freedom and letting kids experience things the way they want to experience them. It’s about a specific kind of freedom and a specific kind of experience. It’s no less rooted in some specific conception of the “right” way to grow up than the protective stuff it decries.

              We’re learning all kind of stuff regarding the benefits of video games, and I’d point to them and my “safe, supervised activities” as the source of my confidence and so on. I just finished growing up and was very sheltered in the way they described my whole life, and I just found the things they say my generation lacks from other sources. I may be an outlier, but looking at my peers, I don’t think so.

              The research is interesting to some extant, but I worry how much of it is nostalgia for a different time. That kind of thing can influence this kind of work very heavily. I’d want to see more serious data before I took too much of this to heart.

              • gka
                gka
                September 24, 2014 at 6:03 am | #

                I have to agree. For all that certain people bemoan excessive “interference” by parents in their children’s growing up, the body of scientific work showing the positive effects of such is relatively vast. There is, of course, such a thing as too much – no child benefits from genuine overprotectiveness, or from helicopter parents. But the flip side is that child development, especially (but not only) early child development, is highly dependent on emotional, physical, intellectual, and social interactions not just with peers but also with parents, mentors, and caregivers.

                The counterargument to actual research based in an actual body of data seems to be equal parts slippery-slope doomsaying, facetious misrepresentation of information, and nostalgic appeal to a “better past” when thousands of children ended up dead or in the emergency room from preventable causes every year. Are there problems with the implementation of safer play environments, issues which turn in part on the one-sided perspective of bureaucrats and a broken, overused tort system? Yeah, sure. But that only demonstrates problems with implementation (and the tort system), not that implementation is unnecessary.

              • Ivan
                Ivan
                September 24, 2014 at 7:23 am | #

                This is the response of a Lunatic Loner! See below for my plans to help your own kid be a REAL loner with a cool armed fort – just a few posts down! 😉

            • Ivan
              Ivan
              September 24, 2014 at 7:20 am | #

              It needs a 50mm canon (not 50 caliber… measure it!) with depleted uranium rounds for protection against enemy knights. Also home-made Claymore mines with ball bearings, Play-Doh & M-80s for projection.

              I have a book available for the “Survivalist Kid” available for $9.99 — great for whacko Dads to spend quality time building underground and above ground “Waco/Koresh” compounds.

              Comes with blueprints – expandable rooms for when the kid’s hormones kick in – to round up the neighborhood girls/girlfriends as his own, and a “church” where the boyfriends agree to put their dongs away and build walls instead!

              Just email me at “LunaticLonerPlans@MyOwnCountryInTexas.com” for more info and pricing!!

              • Ivan
                Ivan
                September 24, 2014 at 7:25 am | #

                (don’t email me… it’s not a real address or thing!)

                • Lanval
                  Lanval
                  September 24, 2014 at 10:28 am | #

                  …Then who replied to me with a list of delivery costs?

            • TPman
              TPman
              October 1, 2014 at 8:32 pm | #

              Man reminds me of all the cool playgrounds I’ve seen torn down as I grew up. So much merriment lost.

        • Kennerly
          Kennerly
          September 24, 2014 at 1:07 am | #

          Boys are supposed to get hurt, that’s how the learn to ignore pain and become manly men.

          • GoldStarz
            GoldStarz
            September 24, 2014 at 1:09 am | #

            Especially ignore that emotional pain and redirect it at another source. Like feminism. Feminism /obviously/ deserves your hate for assuming you can not be a dickface and that you’re a better person than you are.

            • tinfoil theory
              tinfoil theory
              September 24, 2014 at 2:07 am | #

              You mean a rapist?

            • Gadgeteer Smashwidget
              Gadgeteer Smashwidget
              September 24, 2014 at 3:11 am | #

              Or computational linguistics.
              *xkcd 114*

            • gka
              gka
              September 24, 2014 at 6:05 am | #

              Ruth eye-roll, so perfect.

            • The Articulator
              The Articulator
              September 24, 2014 at 10:25 am | #

              You mean assuming that you are /already/ a dickface and need to be a better person than you are?

              • Doom Shepherd
                Doom Shepherd
                September 24, 2014 at 12:01 pm | #

                If you’re human, the assumption is probably accurate. Being good is like being cool: If you have to TELL people you are… You ain’t.

            • Masterofbones
              Masterofbones
              September 25, 2014 at 3:47 am | #

              Haha, being mad at a group whose opinions cover every possible idea on the matter would be pretty stupid. Now, hating specific groups/types of feminists, now that is a perfectly logical thing to do. Some sections of feminism are quite horrible.

              Of course, by calling yourself a member of said all-encompassing group you are supporting all other members of said group, no matter how bad(assuming those people are not kicked out of the group). Since feminism isn’t capable of kicking people out, it cannot avoid this problem.

              So I just stick to explaining my views. If I called myself a feminist, I’d have to explain every step of my views anyway, sothe name doesn’t really help anone.

      • khambatta
        khambatta
        September 24, 2014 at 12:10 am | #

        She loses all that credit by leaving Marcie up there.

        • MrSirk
          MrSirk
          September 24, 2014 at 12:15 am | #

          Hey that’s someone else’s kid who cares if she falls and gets hurt the accident possibly turning her into a mute the rest of her life.

          • Nogre
            Nogre
            September 24, 2014 at 4:12 am | #

            I’m pretty sure if my kid was playing and climbing like that and some other parent demanded they get down (especially saying what Linda is saying), I’d be pissed.

            I’m not even sure if I’m cool with others cussing out they’re own kids. If someone were to cuss out mine, there’d be a reckoning, because that is not okay.

            • Ivan
              Ivan
              September 24, 2014 at 7:31 am | #

              That’s a bit excessive for a comment directed at air, not “you” personally, unless you’re standing there.

              Do you always seek out “fighting words” to justify “Disorderly Conduct” to respond to (which is permitted, but only in the most vile and lowest scoring, least educated states)?

              • Nogre
                Nogre
                September 24, 2014 at 12:15 pm | #

                What she said in panel 4, not panel 5. And in that second paragraph, I’m exaggerating. I wouldn’t physically attack someone for verbally berating my child like this, though I would probably intervene politely.

          • Ivan
            Ivan
            September 24, 2014 at 7:27 am | #

            @MrSirk — Could you please rewrite that? Try inserting basic punctuation and the occasional Oxford comma, and with luck, it will read like English!

            • MrSirk
              MrSirk
              September 24, 2014 at 9:32 am | #

              We can only hope.

            • Historyman68
              Historyman68
              September 24, 2014 at 10:07 am | #

              Who gives a fuck about an Oxford Comma?

              • Jen Aside
                Jen Aside
                September 24, 2014 at 7:28 pm | #

                The Oxford Comma benefits the strippers, Hitler and Stalin.

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          September 24, 2014 at 12:19 am | #

          “She might have welfare-cooties on her or something”.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      September 24, 2014 at 12:04 am | #

      THINK OF THE CHILDREN! 😛

      • Opus the Poet
        Opus the Poet
        September 24, 2014 at 12:11 am | #

        I did, they’ll be fine.

        • GoldStarz
          GoldStarz
          September 24, 2014 at 1:10 am | #

          I WAS TALKING ABOUT ME! THINK OF THE ADULT-CHILDREN!

          • Ancestral Hamster
            Ancestral Hamster
            September 24, 2014 at 3:18 am | #

            Too old, too tough, probably gamey as well. Pass.

            • Lume
              Lume
              September 24, 2014 at 4:39 am | #

              Bet a hamster would taste good. Never tasted hamster before.

              • Ivan
                Ivan
                September 24, 2014 at 7:39 am | #

                Tastes the same a rat, squirrel, guinea pig and rabbit.

                In order of country, that would be: China, USA, Peru, everywhere (for common eating). In the mid-80s, there was a fast-food place started at Purdue that served rabbit (and supplied a fur operation — or the other way around) – but it’s showcase store for investors/franchise investigation was shut down in just a few months because of shady SEC rule breaking.

                I tried the nuggets just one – as usual, expensive, and “just like chicken” – but they had a good name (wish I could recall it) – does anyone else here who was a Boiler back then remember it? On the hill with the Flying Tomato Bros pizza place, but in the corner – by the yogurt place and the Aladdin’s Castle arcade. Would have been 1984 to 1986. It wasn’t around long, but it got LOTS of press.

                Whoever was running that for them really did a good job, and did equally good at being quiet when they were shut down for non-USDA inspected rabbit and then the SEC stuff.

                • Ivan
                  Ivan
                  September 24, 2014 at 7:41 am | #

                  note… I have some resistant keys in the ASDF & E/C section of my keyboard, thanks to a fan and minor instant cocoa dust. Sorry about the errors above I can’t edit.

      • Ancestral Hamster
        Ancestral Hamster
        September 24, 2014 at 3:17 am | #

        I am. And I think they’ll go better as lasagna as opposed to pot roast.

        “People who say they don’t like children simply have not had them in the right sauce.” Attributed to W.C. Fields, but I have been unable to confirm this online or in older print sources.

        • Ivan
          Ivan
          September 24, 2014 at 7:50 am | #

          Surely there are enough Idi Amin quotes around to tell you which is the best age and part!!

          I’m betting that a slow-roasting (250-260 degrees) in a convection oven — as is typical for all great cuts of meat, so they don’t dry out, yet still reach proper temp – such as turkey and prime rib that is on a pricey (and sometimes not too pricey on holidays) buffet line, is the way to do it.

          I recently read that one of the Chinese emperors used to select one of his concubines regularly for fancy entertaining – but would save the head, chilled, so everyone could see she was beautiful – and he didn’t just have the ugly ones cooked up.

          I would like to have that tradition come back – except have it put into action in the United States Congress. People who shut down the government, people who yell “LIAR!” at the president during State of the Union speeches, etc., would be ceremoniously treated with the same respect they gave their constituents, the people of the USA and their president.

          Cooked by the best chefs, served fancy on an exquisite display – after which, it would be pushed (equally ceremoniously, if necessary) down the throats of their relatives and staffers, — Shakespeare style (the eating of the children) and then celebratory appointment by the state’s governor could refill the spot, hopefully with someone who understands the responsibility and respect inherent with the position — or perhaps they just like the idea of becoming lunch for their own group of people.

          Either way works for me.

    • Camachri
      Camachri
      September 24, 2014 at 12:07 am | #

      She went up the down-slide! Get her off of there before she makes it a metaphor!

    • Mr. Random
      Mr. Random
      September 24, 2014 at 12:08 am | #

      Nononono. Children are supposed to play IN the play sets.
      Teenagers are supposed to play ON them.
      Adults can do either, so long as they don’t mind the looks and the cops.

      • Dorje Sylas
        Dorje Sylas
        September 24, 2014 at 12:21 am | #

        And are careful of weight tolerances. 😛

        • David Herbert
          David Herbert
          September 24, 2014 at 3:18 am | #

          And don’t leave their needles lying around.

    • John
      John
      September 24, 2014 at 12:24 am | #

      To be fair, I fell off a slide when I was about Sal’s age, and I still have the scar 35 years later. Of course that was jagged metal ’70s playground equipment, not the rounded plastic safed stuff they’ve got now. Whenever “now” is with the flashback and the sliding timescale and all.

      • Jen Aside
        Jen Aside
        September 24, 2014 at 12:27 am | #

        From like four feet high? Four and a half?

        In my day, we had WOOD playsets–yay, splinters!

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          September 24, 2014 at 12:45 am | #

          Great grand pappy mode: “In my day, we didn’t have namby-pamby playgrounds, we were too busy working for a living back before OHAS was even a thing”.

          • StClair
            StClair
            September 24, 2014 at 1:58 am | #

            My playground was paved. Guess what happened when I fell while playing soccer and someone (in cleats) stepped on my little finger?

            • 4th Dimension
              4th Dimension
              September 24, 2014 at 2:39 am | #

              Happy fun times and rainbows?

              • JacHunter
                JacHunter
                September 24, 2014 at 3:28 am | #

                And kittens sneezing.

                • StClair
                  StClair
                  September 24, 2014 at 4:24 am | #

                  Yeah. Let’s go with that.

                • Ivan
                  Ivan
                  September 24, 2014 at 7:53 am | #

                  Nail biting – but with a full view and no angular restrictions??

                • StClair
                  StClair
                  September 24, 2014 at 3:52 pm | #

                  That’s an even better description. Well done. I would have also accepted “peeled away”.

                  (Actually, not SO bad; and it eventually healed down to just a smooth/rippled scar patch over most of the last knuckle. Yay for the resilience of youth.)

            • gka
              gka
              September 24, 2014 at 6:10 am | #

              Fried food?

          • Animal
            Animal
            September 24, 2014 at 7:30 am | #

            My playground was 60 acres of hardwood timber, and free access to the farms and fields on all sides, as all the local kids wandered pretty freely.

            I wasn’t all that much past 12 or so when I started taking a .22 rifle, a few sandwiches, a pocketful of cookies and staying out 2, 3 or 4 days at a time. My Mom worried a little; the Old Man always took the attitude “he’ll come back when he gets hungry.”

            When I turned 16 I threw my canoe on top of my car, drove up to Minnesota and spent three weeks canoeing in the Boundary Waters. Alone.

            And look! Here I am, middle-aged, confident, self-assured, capable, and all in (more or less) one piece.

            And yes, I think kids today are generally far too restrained. Let them go out and play! Yes, they may get hurt. It’s part of growing up. Life frequently hurts. Kids may as well get used to it.

        • Nogre
          Nogre
          September 24, 2014 at 4:19 am | #

          I hated when we were taken to old wood playgrounds. They were cool at first, but the inevitable splinters already kinda ruined the mood 5 minutes in. I guess I was just spoiled by not painful playgrounds.

        • JaneDoe
          JaneDoe
          September 24, 2014 at 6:47 pm | #

          Yeah, it was mostly metal playgrounds for me too. Covered in sand. In the Mojave Desert. This was a fun combination 😛

      • John Cabot
        John Cabot
        September 24, 2014 at 12:43 am | #

        My classmate was on the monkeybars, fell, and SNAP went her arm.

        So much for using as intended.

        Still, it was pretty fun when I got over my fear induced by that to try them out myself!

        • Disloyal Subject
          Disloyal Subject
          September 24, 2014 at 12:55 am | #

          I never trusted my upper body stamina for monkey bars, so I climbed atop them and used them as a bridge.
          Whatever caution points I earn for that are negated by tossing a large, heavy rock up to catch, then forgetting to catch it because I was admiring the way the light caught it on the way down. My skull was permanently dented, but I somehow avoided any concussion; hurray for dense bones! The school nurse was justifiably concerned anyway.
          Lesson learned.

          • Jen Aside
            Jen Aside
            September 24, 2014 at 1:13 am | #

            The moral of the story: Kids are stupid

            • Jen Aside
              Jen Aside
              September 24, 2014 at 1:14 am | #

              [okay that sounds needlessly harsh, but basically kids are supposed to do stupid things and grow out of that–some folks never do, tho]

              • Kiapdx
                Kiapdx
                September 24, 2014 at 4:23 am | #

                Kids are supposed to make mistakes. Safety advice is a lot harder to follow when no one will tell you why, after all. (you’ll get hurt isn’t enough. How will I be hurt? Will it be really painful? Will I get the day off from school or just a band-aid? Will I get grounded?)

                • HeySo
                  HeySo
                  September 24, 2014 at 6:04 am | #

                  Well put.

            • Flailing
              Flailing
              September 24, 2014 at 1:33 am | #

              It’s “You can’t trust the system!”

            • Deanatay
              Deanatay
              September 24, 2014 at 8:18 am | #

              replace ‘stupid’ with ‘learning’.

              • Opus the Poet
                Opus the Poet
                September 24, 2014 at 11:18 am | #

                Exactly. There’s stupid and there’s ignorant, which is treatable with knowledge. ignorant left untreated turns to stupid, which is incurable.

                • Jen Aside
                  Jen Aside
                  September 24, 2014 at 7:31 pm | #

                  I was being facetious with using ‘stupid’ and really shouldn’t have been, but ‘ignorant’ has had this air of snark about it, too… accurate as it is.

              • begbert2
                begbert2
                September 24, 2014 at 3:27 pm | #

                We’re talking about chucking a rock in the air and standing under it staring at it until it hits you in the head. Let’s not get all excited at how much of a learning experience that was, unless that was his first encounter with rocks, heavy objects, and gravity.

        • Pat
          Pat
          September 24, 2014 at 1:15 am | #

          I only liked monkey bars once I got tall enough to stand on the ground.

        • Sam
          Sam
          September 24, 2014 at 7:51 am | #

          My brother played on monkeybars once and one of the rungs was loose. He was a TEENAGER using equipment PROPERLY, but the loose rung meant he fell and broke his leg on the hard ground below. He had to go to hospital to get a cast because of a single loose rung on monkey bars combined with the hardness of the ground.

          That’s why I actually like that people put in softer stuff in play area ground and make the play stuff out of plastic rather than metal or wood – it is safer and prevents serious injuries – if a break doesn’t heal properly, you CAN have issues for the rest of your life e.g. a limp, difficulty moving part of the body, pain whenever you use that part of the body for short periods of time, and that stuff is not something you want a child to experience.

          • anonymous
            anonymous
            September 24, 2014 at 9:43 am | #

            To be fair, monkey bars are designed to hold 7-12 year olds more than to hold teenagers.

            • Leorale
              Leorale
              September 24, 2014 at 10:27 am | #

              I’ve seen some big, muscular 12-yr-olds. Monkey bars ought to be hella strong.

              I like when they put partially-rubber flooring underneath tall structures. That way, a kid can have the freedom to climb cool stuff, and can learn when they fall (because falling is still scary, makes a big sound, etc) while still probably avoiding serious damage and casts and such.

          • gwalla
            gwalla
            September 24, 2014 at 11:51 am | #

            All the monkeybars I saw when I was a kid were made of welded steel pipe. Rungs couldn’t get loose (without obvious damage).

            But since I’ve always been kind of hefty and had woeful upper body strength, I never spent much time on them.

      • Anonymous
        Anonymous
        September 24, 2014 at 2:59 am | #

        My guess is “late 90s to 2000 as of today”, but that’s just going to slide forward as the comic progresses.

        Considering all the kids in this flashback are now college freshmen, and they look like they’re around 3 or 4 years old (Walky looks the same as when he was in that religious TV show a couple arcs ago) we’re probably looking back around 15 years.

        • xKiv
          xKiv
          September 24, 2014 at 7:47 pm | #

          Assuming Willis knows what he’s talking about in two-days-ago annotation (“… buncha five-year-olds”), they are all 5.
          (also, “may not be the best time to out Marcie when she’s five” on tumblr)

    • Cheryl
      Cheryl
      September 24, 2014 at 2:51 am | #

      EPIC FORSIGHT

      • tinfoil theory
        tinfoil theory
        September 25, 2014 at 4:04 am | #

        Just like the gypsy woman had.

    • Aaron Bourque
      Aaron Bourque
      September 24, 2014 at 10:48 am | #

      …how did you do that?

    • Micah
      Micah
      September 26, 2014 at 11:55 pm | #

      Um, yeah, the roofs on those playgrounds are not designed to be climbed on. Most kids in the age range the equipment is meant for can’t even reach them without climbing onto the safety walls that are supposed to keep them in.

  2. Camachri
    Camachri
    September 24, 2014 at 12:01 am | #

    It’s precious moments like these that make me wonder: how the heck did Sal beat Marcie in the “bad-assest character” poll by sixteen-hundred votes?

    Also: screw you Linda.

    • Salmo
      Salmo
      September 24, 2014 at 12:02 am | #

      Linda is an ass character and in many ways a bad person, but not a bad-ass person character.

      • Doctor_Who
        Doctor_Who
        September 24, 2014 at 12:09 am | #

        Maybe she’s bad and her husband is an ass, and together that produces a badass?

        • tinfoil theory
          tinfoil theory
          September 24, 2014 at 2:23 am | #

          While I don’t doubt that Linda rides her hubby like an ass,
          “badass” evolved from “baddest” and has little to do with any beats of burden.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      September 24, 2014 at 12:04 am | #

      I voted for Marcie. Y’all dumb-dumbs voted for Sal.

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        September 24, 2014 at 12:09 am | #

        So did I. 😀

      • JacHunter
        JacHunter
        September 24, 2014 at 5:00 am | #

        I can’t remember what I voted for, but I’m pretty sure it would have been Mike if he was an option. Or Dina.

        What, have you seen anyone be aggressive towards her in this comic? They’re afraid of her!

      • Deanatay
        Deanatay
        September 24, 2014 at 8:21 am | #

        Ditto. <3

    • Paul
      Paul
      September 24, 2014 at 12:09 am | #

      Don’t blame me I voted for Faz.

    • John
      John
      September 24, 2014 at 12:11 am | #

      I voted for Amazi-Girl. Marcie’s pretty bad-ass, but I have yet to see her leap off a building, snag a power line in midair, and zipline down it onto the top of a moving truck.

      Though I wouldn’t put it past her.

    • ChocolateRat
      ChocolateRat
      September 24, 2014 at 12:16 am | #

      I voted for Sarah. She beat up a rapist with a bat, which is the most badass thing any of the characters have done, in my opinion.

      • shietka
        shietka
        September 24, 2014 at 12:37 am | #

        Totally. I can’t believe Sarah didn’t score better on that poll.

        • David M Willis
          David M Willis
          September 24, 2014 at 12:42 am | #

          a few people asked why she even deserved to be on the poll and i was like whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat

          • Jen Aside
            Jen Aside
            September 24, 2014 at 1:15 am | #

            are you serious |=C

          • JessWitt
            JessWitt
            September 24, 2014 at 3:15 am | #

            Those people must be new here.

          • Animal
            Animal
            September 24, 2014 at 7:33 am | #

            I refuse to vote in any poll that does not have “I harbor Perverse Sexual Lust” as an option.

          • Ivan
            Ivan
            September 24, 2014 at 7:55 am | #

            She has dirty private parts with plastic toys humming inside!! For that alone she deserves to be on the the poll, for using small plastic poles, for when she can’t get her words together to ask for the flesh variety!!

        • quix
          quix
          September 24, 2014 at 1:06 am | #

          I know. Even apart from the bat incident, she’s stood up to more than once kind of social pressure along of other people would have avoided and went along with.

          • quix
            quix
            September 24, 2014 at 1:06 am | #

            *a lot of other people

            • Gigafreak
              Gigafreak
              September 24, 2014 at 10:27 am | #

              I think Sarah is also the only one in the comic who has ever apologized to someone for physically attacking them. Personal responsibility is kinda badass.

              I still voted for Amber/Amazi-Girl, though.

      • leadsynth
        leadsynth
        September 24, 2014 at 12:54 am | #

        No question that Sarah is badass and that Ryan deserved to be beat up wit ha bat, but I don’t know if we can throw around the term “rapist.” All we know is that Ryan drugged Joyce and gave her some godawful PTSD. We don’t know if he has committed rape.

        • Disloyal Subject
          Disloyal Subject
          September 24, 2014 at 12:58 am | #

          I’m going to make an ass of myself again and assert that intent is just as bad, but easier to atone for. If he’s unrepentant, though? Just about as bad, save perhaps in the consequences for the vic.

          • Jen Aside
            Jen Aside
            September 24, 2014 at 1:18 am | #

            Making the attempt is not *as bad as* actually following through, though. Imagine if we made no distinction between attempted murder and actual murder–what would discourage the would-be murderer from following through at the last second if the punishment would be the same anyway?

            You’d end up with MINORITY REPORT

            • Heather
              Heather
              September 24, 2014 at 1:37 am | #

              I think it would be a bit naive to assume he hasn’t tried something like it before though. He planned it from the beginning for one thing, it wasn’t an on the cuff decision. Finding his ‘mark’ indicates he preplanned it all, it was just choosing a target and that was Joyce. Like what year is he in anyway? And it wouldn’t surprise me if there had been an incident in high school or something- maybe after he got his license in another town though so the ‘rents and others don’t find out. Joyce actually got lucky at some points that she didn’t end up alone longer with the guy. Seems to me others wouldn’t be. Plus that kind of evil isn’t something that pops up over a 24 hour period. He’s a rapist and he utterly knows it- he just doesn’t care.

              Plus murder can in some cases actually be actually understandable. Like say someone utterly ruined your life or something or harmed someone you cared about and you don’t want them to hurt others ever again or you/your friend or they never got punsihed. I mean it’s technically vigilantism and ill advised but it can be understandable sometimes. Not so with rape.There can never be any forgiveness for that, attempted or otherwise.

              • tinfoil theory
                tinfoil theory
                September 24, 2014 at 2:28 am | #

                The Devil’s Dictionary states: There are four kinds of homicide: felonious, excusable, justifiable, and praiseworthy.

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          September 24, 2014 at 2:13 am | #

          Ryan didn’t exactly slip Joyce a micky cos he wanted to give her a good night’s rest you know.

        • ChocolateRat
          ChocolateRat
          September 24, 2014 at 2:35 am | #

          I understand what you’re saying, but he brought drugs with the intent of raping someone and generally seemed to be planning it ahead of time, also didn’t seem afraid at all. He seemed manipulative too which I don’t think happens overnight. Based on his behaviour I’d be more surprised to learn he had never done something similar before than hearing he had.

        • kelticat
          kelticat
          September 24, 2014 at 2:54 am | #

          Would you agree, though, that Ryan commited sexual assault on Joyce. And I seem to recall that he was justifying his drug enhanced attack by labeling Joyce as a cocktease.

          • tinfoil theory
            tinfoil theory
            September 24, 2014 at 3:06 am | #

            Committed, no, attempted. That’s the point. And how he would justify it is not relevant.

            “Would-be rapist” would be more accurate.
            Unless you have knowledge of any successful attempts of his?
            That he meant to do it is bad enough, he ought to be committed, but there is still a difference between intent and deed.

            • kelticat
              kelticat
              September 24, 2014 at 3:39 am | #

              All rape is sexual assault, but not all sexual assault is rape. Assault is defined as an attack on someone. Taking a swing at anyone is assault, whether that swing connects or not. If it connects it is assault and battery.

              Ryan attempted rape, and commited sexual assault through roofies, insulting Joyce in a sexual manner, and physically attacking her. Sarah commited assault-and battery and quite possibly assault-with-deadly when she hit Ryan with a baseball bat. Depending on Amber’s martial art rank, and laws of the region, she commited assault-with-deadly during Blaine’s beatdown.

              • gka
                gka
                September 24, 2014 at 6:16 am | #

                *slow clap*

              • Ivan
                Ivan
                September 24, 2014 at 8:04 am | #

                Amber should have done the beat down with one of her jugs — I’ll leave it to one of you to phrase that one legally… “battery with a sexual milk jug, shaken, not stirred… um…” (I’m coming up blank)….

              • Gigafreak
                Gigafreak
                September 24, 2014 at 10:58 am | #

                Well, baseball bats often aren’t categorized as deadly weapons because they have a purpose other than physically harming people. It varies from state to state, but “deadliness” in America is generally defined by the item’s original intended purpose rather than its lethality; attacking with a chainsaw often won’t be “with a deadly weapon” because chainsaws are supposed to be used on trees. Note the list of examples given in the article: all of those are designed to be honest-to-goodness weapons and not tools-that-happen-to-be-dangerous, which is why it has to list specific kinds of knives rather than just “knives” (as many knives are designed for cooking, eating, or outdoor survival).

                So anyway we need a lawyer from Indiana to tell us if baseball bats count as deadly weapons in that state.

                • Opus the Poet
                  Opus the Poet
                  September 24, 2014 at 11:28 am | #

                  In TX “assault with a deadly” is based more on the intent than the weapon, motor vehicles are “deadly weapons” when used with the intent to kill or injure. They just aren’t classified like that enough.

              • tinfoil theory
                tinfoil theory
                September 25, 2014 at 3:55 am | #

                Roofies aren’t inherently sexual, and insulting is not the same as assaulting.

                Ryan assaulted Joyce, unprovoked. That alone would be enough to make him a horrible person. And he is much worse than that. I cannot work up any sympathy for him. Fortunately his attempt at assaulting her sexually remained a frustrated attempt.

                I am not a lawyer, maybe in Indiana there really is no legal difference between attempted assault and actual assault.

            • fogel
              fogel
              September 24, 2014 at 6:22 am | #

              He was thwarted by Sarah. No points to him.

    • insomniac
      insomniac
      September 24, 2014 at 12:32 am | #

      Marcie is awesome, but her appearances in context (before now) are pretty much entirely as Sal’s sidekick/hanger-on. We’ve seen more badass from Sal on-panel, at least before now.

      Also, it probably doesn’t help her ‘screen presence’ that her lines are translated through Sal, at least to those of us who don’t understand ASL.

  3. Toad
    Toad
    September 24, 2014 at 12:01 am | #

    IRONY

    • Jen Aside
      Jen Aside
      September 24, 2014 at 12:32 am | #

      dramatic, in fact

    • nothri
      nothri
      September 24, 2014 at 12:34 am | #

      Its like rain on your wedding day.

      • Jen Aside
        Jen Aside
        September 24, 2014 at 1:19 am | #

        “It’s like meeting the girl of your dreams, then finding out she’s only five”

        • Verdande
          Verdande
          September 24, 2014 at 1:58 am | #

          It’s like a song about irony where none of the examples are actually ironic

          • Kang the Less-Balanced-Than-Usual
            Kang the Less-Balanced-Than-Usual
            September 24, 2014 at 2:38 am | #

            Don’t you think?

          • insomniac
            insomniac
            September 24, 2014 at 2:49 am | #

            A FREE RI-YI-YIDE

          • Adam Black
            Adam Black
            September 24, 2014 at 4:13 am | #

            It IS ironic that you say that..
            Ahem….
            http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/situational+irony

            Don’t you think ?

        • Ivan
          Ivan
          September 24, 2014 at 8:05 am | #

          >> “It’s like meeting the girl of your dreams, then finding out she’s only five”

          BRAVO!!! THREAD WINNER!!

          • Jen Aside
            Jen Aside
            September 24, 2014 at 7:56 pm | #

            Can you believe I can’t find a SINGLE copy of that specific reference online?? |=<

      • Crumplepunch
        Crumplepunch
        September 24, 2014 at 5:52 am | #

        That’s not ironic, it’s just unfortunate.

        • Gigafreak
          Gigafreak
          September 24, 2014 at 11:01 am | #

          Linda’s attempt to protect Sal in the hopes of preventing her from knocking over a convenience store as a cry for help… has indirectly led to Sal knocking over a convenience store as a cry for help.
          I’d say that is pretty damn ironic, yes.

          • Clif
            Clif
            September 25, 2014 at 12:33 am | #

            I think the irony is more Linda decrying someone elses “bad parenting” as likely to lead to an undesirable result, while it will be her bad parenting that leads to an identical undesirable result.

  4. MrSirk
    MrSirk
    September 24, 2014 at 12:02 am | #

    More like drinking in a parking lot and beating up caped vigilantes but hey it all starts somewhere.

    • AgentKeen
      AgentKeen
      September 24, 2014 at 12:04 am | #

      That came AFTER robbing the convenience stores.

    • Opus the Poet
      Opus the Poet
      September 24, 2014 at 12:05 am | #

      Except she did knock over a couple of convenience stores, with a knife.

      • MrSirk
        MrSirk
        September 24, 2014 at 12:12 am | #

        Also banging the T.A.

        • Ivan
          Ivan
          September 24, 2014 at 8:06 am | #

          THIS IS NOT A CRIME!

          In fact, it’s a serious motivator for graduate school!!

          • PoweredBySucrose
            PoweredBySucrose
            September 24, 2014 at 1:09 pm | #

            It’s not a crime, necessarily, but a sexual relationship between a TA and a student in their class [i]will[/i] get the TA fired.

          • Clif
            Clif
            September 25, 2014 at 12:37 am | #

            Banging the TA increases motivation for entering graduate school? Where did you do your research?

            • Charles
              Charles
              September 26, 2014 at 1:11 am | #

              My introductory linguistics TA’s apartment.

      • insomniac
        insomniac
        September 24, 2014 at 12:32 am | #

        Marcie didn’t! (that we know of)

        • John Cabot
          John Cabot
          September 24, 2014 at 12:44 am | #

          Marcie’s too busy at her bible study, Skaters for Christ

  5. NCP19
    NCP19
    September 24, 2014 at 12:02 am | #

    THE DARK SAL RISES

  6. Emperor Kiva
    Emperor Kiva
    September 24, 2014 at 12:02 am | #

    I’m at a loss for words

  7. Idon'tcarenomore
    Idon'tcarenomore
    September 24, 2014 at 12:02 am | #

    Sal and Marcie are so dang CUTE.

    • Leonou
      Leonou
      September 24, 2014 at 2:04 am | #

      Panel 3 Marcie is the fairy-princess-queen of Cuteness !

  8. Yotomoe
    Yotomoe
    September 24, 2014 at 12:03 am | #

    I bet she’ll grow up to have a bad mouth. Watch her. She’ll be cussing all the time.

    • newllend
      newllend
      September 24, 2014 at 12:10 am | #

      And she will be jumping in and out of windows all the damn time.

    • Doctor_Who
      Doctor_Who
      September 24, 2014 at 12:11 am | #

      Nah. Marcie grows up to have the foul mouth. They installed a V-Chip in her like in the South Park movie, which is why she doesn’t talk anymore.

  9. sps48
    sps48
    September 24, 2014 at 12:03 am | #

    Irony a bit overdone, though.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      September 24, 2014 at 12:06 am | #

      Iron-y? That’s the stuff that anvils are made of. 😀

      • Leorale
        Leorale
        September 24, 2014 at 12:10 am | #

        I think it’d be ironic, if we were all made of iron.

        • Ivan
          Ivan
          September 24, 2014 at 8:09 am | #

          We are, to a certain extent. Iron and calcium, and about 7 cents worth of other minerals (assuming no gold fillings, crowns, inner pins or titanium bone screws!)

          (Prices may vary. Contact your local commodities trader for more information on current mineral prices)

          • Cybersnark
            Cybersnark
            September 24, 2014 at 11:18 am | #

            “Water: 35 l. Carbon: 20 kg. Ammonia: 4 l. Lime: 1.5 kg. Phosphorus: 800 g. Salt: 250 g. Saltpeter: 100 g. Sulfur: 80 g. Fluorine 7.5 g. Iron 5 g. Silicon 3 g. and trace amounts of 15 other elements.

            And in case you’re wondering… All those ingredients can be bought on a child’s allowance. Humans can be built on the cheap.” –Edward Elric

      • 3oranges
        3oranges
        September 24, 2014 at 12:22 am | #

        Iron Y is one of the best alphabetic superheroes. Yes, even better than V and the X-men.

      • Kang the Less-Balanced-Than-Usual
        Kang the Less-Balanced-Than-Usual
        September 24, 2014 at 2:31 am | #

        God is an iron.

        • StClair
          StClair
          September 24, 2014 at 4:29 am | #

          Beat me to it.

          • Ivan
            Ivan
            September 24, 2014 at 8:10 am | #

            My Black & Decker Steam Iron is “Ghod-Like” to me!!

    • JessWitt
      JessWitt
      September 24, 2014 at 3:18 am | #

      It’s as Ann as the nose of plain’s face.

  10. Em
    Em
    September 24, 2014 at 12:04 am | #

    Wow holy shit Linda is even more of jerk than I thought. And I thought she was pretty jerky to begin with.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      September 24, 2014 at 12:10 am | #

      Jerkier than beef jerky.

  11. Nena
    Nena
    September 24, 2014 at 12:05 am | #

    I have seen people cuss kids out like that. It makes me sad.

    • OpticianOfUrza
      OpticianOfUrza
      September 24, 2014 at 1:56 am | #

      Reminds me of the time a doctor told my mum that I had an addictive personality, and would probably end up ODing in a gutter.

      I don’t even drink.

      • Ivan
        Ivan
        September 24, 2014 at 8:12 am | #

        Yeah, but the whole heroin thing at six years old WAS a possible indicator, don’t you agree?

  12. newllend
    newllend
    September 24, 2014 at 12:06 am | #

    Holy shit her foresight puts Yoda to shame.

    • newllend
      newllend
      September 24, 2014 at 12:09 am | #

      Oh wait she talking about Marcie in that case she might be off just a little bit, oh ya and also HA !

  13. Mr. Random
    Mr. Random
    September 24, 2014 at 12:06 am | #

    Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

  14. Regalli
    Regalli
    September 24, 2014 at 12:07 am | #

    … Well, that hurts.

    *Gives baby Sal all the hugs and friendship*

    *Would give them to current Sal, but I’m not sure she’d accept them.*

    • Sam
      Sam
      September 24, 2014 at 8:39 am | #

      She would likely pat you on the head awkwardly and say something like, “Well it was nice meeting ya…affectionate stranger…but ah got to go to math or something.” And then if you accepted her excuse, she’d quickly leave – she’d be too nice to hurt your feelings but also feel too awkward to reciprocate me thinks. XD

  15. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    September 24, 2014 at 12:07 am | #

    I don’t recall but was Marcie involved the convenience store robbery at all?

    • insomniac
      insomniac
      September 24, 2014 at 12:33 am | #

      Unless I’m entirely forgetting something–not that we saw. Sal was arrested alone and we never saw a sign of a second mugger.

      • anonymous
        anonymous
        September 24, 2014 at 8:00 am | #

        Was there a second mugger behind the grassy knoll?

        • Ivan
          Ivan
          September 24, 2014 at 8:14 am | #

          Yes – they were behind the grassy knoll. Another was just above on the overpass. The problem with the plan was the other two idiots were in Dallas! not anywhere near THIS store! The whole plan went to hell!!

    • Jen Aside
      Jen Aside
      September 24, 2014 at 12:34 am | #

      The one we’ve seen? Not unless she was a NINJA and Amber never saw her

    • Itama
      Itama
      September 24, 2014 at 1:08 am | #

      i dunno why, but for some reason i kind of hope marcie was there and her muteness is somehow amber’s fault.
      maybe i just like watching my favourite characters get shit on.

      DRAMA WHIRLWINDS FOR EVERYBODY!!

    • Deanatay
      Deanatay
      September 24, 2014 at 1:18 pm | #

      I think Marcie was more an element of Sal’s recovery from her teenage crash-and-burn years. Sal probably avoided Marcie during those years – I’m guessing she carried around some crushing guilt for whatever horrible thing winds up happening to Marcie through her teenage years, and at some point during Catholic school reconciles with Marcie, who forgives her and provides her catharsis.

  16. Mr k
    Mr k
    September 24, 2014 at 12:07 am | #

    Here’s my theory. Marcie has Black Bolt’s power.

    • Lonas
      Lonas
      September 24, 2014 at 12:20 am | #

      Strong desire for this to be true.

  17. timemonkey
    timemonkey
    September 24, 2014 at 12:08 am | #

    Yeah, I figured this would somehow lead to Sal getting in trouble.

  18. Ridureyu
    Ridureyu
    September 24, 2014 at 12:08 am | #

    Sal’s mom: “Black children aren’t allowed to be seen in public!”

    • Kiwi
      Kiwi
      September 24, 2014 at 12:12 am | #

      How does that follow from anything that has happened in this particular strip? I mean ok we know from other strips that she actually has a poor racist attitude, but Marcie’s as far as I can tell not black and she’s the focus of her negative comments here.

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        September 24, 2014 at 12:30 am | #

        More like she’s one of those mothers who excessively worry about their girl-children getting physically hurt and them hanging around with the ‘riffraff’.

        • tinfoil theory
          tinfoil theory
          September 24, 2014 at 2:42 am | #


          The darkness must go down the river of nights dreaming
          Flow morphia slow, let the sun and light come streaming
          Into my life.

          • Ivan
            Ivan
            September 24, 2014 at 8:19 am | #

            Oh… you make me miss my poppy garden so!

            Flow (5α,6α)-7,8-didehydro-
            4,5-epoxy-17-methylmorphinan-3,6-diol, flow! Let the sun and light and chicks and boners go streaming to others from my own personal webcast channel!

            • Clif
              Clif
              September 25, 2014 at 12:42 am | #

              URL or it doesn’t happen.

  19. Jacob Newburn
    Jacob Newburn
    September 24, 2014 at 12:10 am | #

    How dare you act like a child Sal! Don’t you know that children are suppose to be well behaved and not curious about anything at all?!

    • Gadgeteer Smashwidget
      Gadgeteer Smashwidget
      September 24, 2014 at 1:16 am | #

      You should’ve done all that when you were supposed to – in College!

      • Jacob Newburn
        Jacob Newburn
        September 25, 2014 at 12:22 am | #

        Because everybody knows when you hit college, that’s when the real fun begins. Kind of like when you get married and the sex is non stop.

        • Clif
          Clif
          September 25, 2014 at 12:43 am | #

          For some random reason I’m suspecting you’ve never been married for any extensive length of time.

          • tinfoil theory
            tinfoil theory
            September 25, 2014 at 4:09 am | #

            Your irony detector is in serious need of recalibration.

  20. Soozi
    Soozi
    September 24, 2014 at 12:15 am | #

    I roamed pretty dang free for most of my childhood, and now I’m finishing up a degree in physics and me and mom are now best friends.

    Maybe roaming builds character and makes you well adjusted.

    • Nogre
      Nogre
      September 24, 2014 at 4:37 am | #

      I practically didn’t roam at all, and I’ve been quite successful and happy with a great relationship with my parents. There are lots of ways to build that character.

    • Clif
      Clif
      September 25, 2014 at 12:46 am | #

      Maybe roaming free comes out later in nefarious ways like robbing convenience stores and getting physics degrees.

  21. newllend
    newllend
    September 24, 2014 at 12:16 am | #

    So I don’t get this, that part of that play house looks like it was ment to be climb what’s the problem.

    • timemonkey
      timemonkey
      September 24, 2014 at 12:21 am | #

      You’re supposed to play inside that part not on top.

    • Kryss LaBryn
      Kryss LaBryn
      September 24, 2014 at 1:44 am | #

      Yes. Plus remember how Sal said it was slippery..?

    • newllend
      newllend
      September 24, 2014 at 3:46 am | #

      I mean the part of the slide Sal was standing on.

      • Betty Anne
        Betty Anne
        September 24, 2014 at 3:25 pm | #

        She was clearly intending to climb up (or try to) and join “that little vagrant” on top of it, which is what Mrs. Walkerton was over-reacting to. This is the MO of over-protective/helicopter parents: stop a child when they’re doing something perfectly normal, okay and sensible BEFORE they do something that could in any way be interpreted as unacceptable. (I had two of those over-protective parents – my mom was the worse of the two – so I pretty much lived this until I turned 18 and moved out of the house.)

  22. epershannd
    epershannd
    September 24, 2014 at 12:19 am | #

    Gosh, that little wave in the last panel is too precious.

    • JessWitt
      JessWitt
      September 24, 2014 at 3:21 am | #

      And a friendship was born that day, strong enough to survive the rantiest of mom rants.

  23. Kernanator
    Kernanator
    September 24, 2014 at 12:19 am | #

    “I bet she’ll room with an alcoholic in college, too.”

  24. Reb
    Reb
    September 24, 2014 at 12:20 am | #

    Sal needs to learn that the best way to climb as slide is to just run up it as fast as you can- maybe grabbing a side on the curly ones.

    I mean, not like metaphorically, it’s just useful playground knowledge.

    • lipstick_suckerpunch
      lipstick_suckerpunch
      September 24, 2014 at 10:45 am | #

      Best way to climb a slide is shoes and socks off…. And not letting mom catch you doing it.

      • Betty Anne
        Betty Anne
        September 24, 2014 at 3:26 pm | #

        +1

  25. Arkadi
    Arkadi
    September 24, 2014 at 12:22 am | #

    Ouch ^^ That was below the belt.

    • newllend
      newllend
      September 24, 2014 at 12:39 am | #

      I can just imagine like 8 years later Marcie is just walking by their house then see’s Sal being brought back home by the police and then remembers what Linda said so she just flips her off and yells “what know Mrs. Perfect mother ! “

  26. caesaria82
    caesaria82
    September 24, 2014 at 12:22 am | #

    Marcie’s pose in panel 3 is so boss. I love it.

    • Leorale
      Leorale
      September 24, 2014 at 10:42 am | #

      Strongly agree.

  27. Jumanji83
    Jumanji83
    September 24, 2014 at 12:25 am | #

    God preserve us from overprotective parents…

    • Nogre
      Nogre
      September 24, 2014 at 4:42 am | #

      Yes, let’s worry about the over protectiveness rather than the racism, cussing, and ridiculous standards about how “good kids” behave.

      I’m honestly not even sure if real concern over Sal’s physical well being is all that much of a factor here compared to the rest.

    • xKiv
      xKiv
      September 24, 2014 at 8:51 pm | #

      … but not too much!

  28. Van Jealous
    Van Jealous
    September 24, 2014 at 12:26 am | #

    “Elizabeth…….” My aunt’s middle name was “Elizabeth…”. And her husband was a crooked policeman who collected protection from store owners for 30 years. SEE! Your middle name WILL get you in trouble later in life as much as your first OR your last name!!!!

    • Kang the Less-Balanced-Than-Usual
      Kang the Less-Balanced-Than-Usual
      September 24, 2014 at 2:35 am | #

      Oh dear. Kang’s middle name is “the”.

      • Opus the Poet
        Opus the Poet
        September 24, 2014 at 11:35 am | #

        How about that, so is mine… 😉

        • Clif
          Clif
          September 25, 2014 at 12:49 am | #

          So is mine — as far as you know.

        • Kang the Less-Balanced-Than-Usual
          Kang the Less-Balanced-Than-Usual
          September 25, 2014 at 2:06 am | #

          Hm. We nust have been stolen from the same orphanage.

  29. Romanticide
    Romanticide
    September 24, 2014 at 12:30 am | #

    Jeez Linda your parenting seems to have gone so wrong at some point…

    • Jen Aside
      Jen Aside
      September 24, 2014 at 12:36 am | #

      “I remember when I was the perfect parent… before I had kids.”

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        September 24, 2014 at 12:41 am | #

        “No parenting plan ever survives contact with having offspring”.

        • hof1991
          hof1991
          September 24, 2014 at 8:25 am | #

          Was not expecting a paraphrase from Helmuth von Moltke the Elder. But I do appreciate it.

    • JessWitt
      JessWitt
      September 24, 2014 at 3:25 am | #

      She did instill that idea onto Sal’s impressionable little head. Man, parents. They mean well, but they’re, well, mean.

  30. Malchus
    Malchus
    September 24, 2014 at 12:32 am | #

    Sal: “No matter how long it takes, I will reach you someday! Wait for me!”

    Marcie: “‘Kay.”

    • Jen Aside
      Jen Aside
      September 24, 2014 at 12:37 am | #

      Sal’s Go?

    • John Cabot
      John Cabot
      September 24, 2014 at 12:47 am | #

      awwww

  31. Vex Godglove
    Vex Godglove
    September 24, 2014 at 12:34 am | #

    And thus the thought was planted.

  32. Mkvenner
    Mkvenner
    September 24, 2014 at 12:36 am | #

    Yeah that won’t possible come back and bite her in the ass.

  33. Katrika
    Katrika
    September 24, 2014 at 12:41 am | #

    No! Darn it! 🙁

  34. John Cabot
    John Cabot
    September 24, 2014 at 12:49 am | #

    I roamed so free as a kid that before I was seven I’d broken into homes (I didn’t steal anything, I just wanted to see what other houses were like and no one caught me) and would go up to other houses in my pjs during breakfast time and ask if I could join them.

    Later I would bike at three am to convenience stores and use pocket change scavenged from around the house to read comics and get candy.

    I’m pretty sure I was half feral.

    What really concerns me about this is not once did my parents ever mention me maybe not doing this anymore to me or acknowledge it.

    • Jen Aside
      Jen Aside
      September 24, 2014 at 2:24 am | #

      curious what your opinion on this playground would be

      • John Cabot
        John Cabot
        September 25, 2014 at 2:16 am | #

        I would have been all about that. Minus the fire, I pretty much played that as a kid – I discovered a series of abandoned, falling down treehouses in the woods near my neighbourhood that I’d explore.

  35. Yu'Karaya
    Yu'Karaya
    September 24, 2014 at 12:57 am | #

    So this isn’t the best place to ask but I dunno where to ask this– but I swear I remember some sort of flashback which involves Walky suddenly getting abducted by a UFO while playing hide and seek with Billie or something. Was that in this or another comic or am I just imagining things?

    • David M Willis
      David M Willis
      September 24, 2014 at 12:59 am | #

      That’s in Roomies!, which is another continuity.

      • Kennerly
        Kennerly
        September 24, 2014 at 1:03 am | #

        Actually, you can just trace with another marker.

      • Yu'Karaya
        Yu'Karaya
        September 24, 2014 at 1:17 am | #

        Thanks!! I’m a bit drunk and for some reason I remember it being in Dumbing of Age and I thought I was going insane.

        • Clif
          Clif
          September 25, 2014 at 1:02 am | #

          Well, I traced with another marker and still no UFOs came to abduct me, so I have to say it doesn’t work that well.

  36. TheDOCTOR
    TheDOCTOR
    September 24, 2014 at 1:02 am | #

    Is it me, or does Sals Mom look a little like Joyce.

    • Kennerly
      Kennerly
      September 24, 2014 at 1:05 am | #

      Only if Joyce didn’t smile and didn’t have blue eyes, and without those those qualities you might as well say she looks like Head Alien.

      • Heavensrun
        Heavensrun
        September 24, 2014 at 9:10 pm | #

        What are you talking about? They totally both have hair.

    • airyu
      airyu
      September 24, 2014 at 11:36 pm | #

      She looks like a freckle-less Ruth to me.

  37. Darwin
    Darwin
    September 24, 2014 at 1:08 am | #

    So weird seeing Marcie with dialog.

  38. OnyxIdol
    OnyxIdol
    September 24, 2014 at 1:08 am | #

    Laying it on a little thick Mr. Willis?

    Also: Marcie is having none of Your nonsense, Sal.

    • Blackbird
      Blackbird
      September 24, 2014 at 1:36 am | #

      Subtlety is not Willis’ forte.

      • Clif
        Clif
        September 25, 2014 at 12:55 am | #

        I beg to disagree. Did you notice any squirrels in the playground?

  39. Renshear Blade
    Renshear Blade
    September 24, 2014 at 1:15 am | #

    So is Marcie waving in the last panel or giving the bird? or maybe doing the “curses” fist?

    • Jen Aside
      Jen Aside
      September 24, 2014 at 2:26 am | #

      “hang ten”

      [/headcanon]

  40. Jerk
    Jerk
    September 24, 2014 at 1:19 am | #

    Is this the 90’s? Is that why everything’s blue?

    • tinfoil theory
      tinfoil theory
      September 24, 2014 at 2:49 am | #

      … Is that an Eiffel 65 reference?

    • Cheryl
      Cheryl
      September 24, 2014 at 2:50 am | #

      YEs to 90s
      Shame on you for remembering eiffel 65.

    • JessWitt
      JessWitt
      September 24, 2014 at 3:27 am | #

      You mean “Blue World”. That song dates back to the 2K decade, according to Iron Man 3.

  41. Dragon
    Dragon
    September 24, 2014 at 1:50 am | #

    Oh, irony. As it turns out, Marcie is probably more well adjusted and responsible than Sal. Actually, maybe not, since we don’t seem to know much about her.

  42. Los
    Los
    September 24, 2014 at 2:48 am | #

    That last bit of irony kinda bummed me out:-(

    • Gadgeteer Smashwidget
      Gadgeteer Smashwidget
      September 24, 2014 at 2:58 am | #

      This entire comic could reasonably be used as an example of dramatic irony at this point.

  43. Nogre
    Nogre
    September 24, 2014 at 4:47 am | #

    Poor Sal. It started out as a fairly happy memory, and then Linda got involved. I wonder if their dad is any better with this stuff.

  44. Voiddragon13
    Voiddragon13
    September 24, 2014 at 4:55 am | #

    I think my feels won’t be able to handle the shot to the feels I see coming…

  45. cj95
    cj95
    September 24, 2014 at 7:19 am | #

    Racist bongo.

  46. hof1991
    hof1991
    September 24, 2014 at 8:28 am | #

    flashback foreshadowing? It that even a thing?

    • Deanatay
      Deanatay
      September 24, 2014 at 9:02 pm | #

      It’s called ‘irony’.

  47. Tenn
    Tenn
    September 24, 2014 at 9:30 am | #

    That’s evil, Willis. 😉

  48. Slinx
    Slinx
    September 24, 2014 at 9:39 am | #

    SURPRISE ALL-CAPS SCROLL-OVER TEXT THAT STARTS WITH THE WORD SURPRISE

  49. Killjoy
    Killjoy
    September 24, 2014 at 9:54 am | #

    Linda, you suck.

  50. isitsevenyet
    isitsevenyet
    September 24, 2014 at 9:59 am | #

    Oh hey, Sal and I have the same middle name. How about that?

  51. Toes14
    Toes14
    September 24, 2014 at 10:43 am | #

    Hmm, so Marcie could talk when she was younger, but now doesn’t speak & uses sign language instead. Can she still talk but doesn’t for some reason? Or did something happen to make her mute? Will this flashback sequence give us answers, or leave us hanging?

    • Gigafreak
      Gigafreak
      September 24, 2014 at 11:11 am | #

      While it’s possible that this flashback (or series of flashbacks) isn’t of the time Marcie lost her voice, the mere fact that it’s a David Willis story means it’s rather probable that it is.

      • MindLink
        MindLink
        September 24, 2014 at 1:49 pm | #

        Hmm… I suddenly got reminded of Hot Tub Time Machine, where the main characters have travelled back in time, and meet a guy that has only one arm in the present. He still has both of them in the past, cue several scenes throughout the entire movie where the time travellers see this guy get into one situation after the other that seems to be how he lost the arm but ends in a cop out. It does seem like a Willis-y kind of move.

    • Nogre
      Nogre
      September 24, 2014 at 12:29 pm | #

      Willis has said multiple times that Marcie is incapable of speaking, so something must have happened between the time of this flash back and now.

  52. Lonas
    Lonas
    September 24, 2014 at 11:43 am | #

    I demand a webcomic called It’s Marcie or It’s Sal.

  53. Alexx
    Alexx
    September 24, 2014 at 12:21 pm | #

    I feel you, Marcie. My number one goal when going to a park was to find the highest point and nearly kill myself getting on top of it.

    Good times.

    • Bill
      Bill
      September 24, 2014 at 3:52 pm | #

      Agreed.  I’m glad I was a kid when I was, before the namby-pambies, the well-meaning (but clueless) do-gooders, and the government took all the fun out of it.

      • VOldFart
        VOldFart
        September 24, 2014 at 10:01 pm | #

        I Know, right? I long for the days before mandatory seat belts in cars. Of course my stupid parents went and paid extra to have them installed, and insist that we wear them. Assholes. Bicycle helmets? How stupid! Of course my dented one did probably prevent a lifelong disability, but at the cost of my freedom to feel the wind through my hair. When I was 4 years old, my younger brother and I had the run of the neighborhood. It was totally worth losing him to a backing car in the neighbour’s driveway. Then a few years later, when the school district didn’t provide busses to anyone a mile or less away, I got to walk my other brother to school. Good thing that one driver was quick on the brakes when he suddenly ran in front of him. Those were the days.

        Sarcasm aside, I wish we were more mamby pamby back then.

    • Voiddragon13
      Voiddragon13
      September 24, 2014 at 11:17 pm | #

      I firmly believe that trees should be the playground equipment. I mean come on, what’s more fun than climbing a huge tree with many fragile branches which may break and cause you to fall and…I’m not good at this whole convincing fun thing am I?

  54. OmegaDez
    OmegaDez
    September 24, 2014 at 1:15 pm | #

    Once again, parents ruin everything.

  55. Deanatay
    Deanatay
    September 24, 2014 at 1:27 pm | #

    “Hmm, so knocking over convenience stores gets mommy’s attention?”
    *filed away for later*

    • WeezerLuvr3030
      WeezerLuvr3030
      September 24, 2014 at 2:37 pm | #

      Maybe the message was confused, and what was heard was, “Knocking over convenience stores gets Marcie’s attention.”

      • Gadgeteer Smashwidget
        Gadgeteer Smashwidget
        September 24, 2014 at 4:28 pm | #

        Sal x Marcie?

        • Jen Aside
          Jen Aside
          September 24, 2014 at 7:24 pm | #

          YOU KNOW IT

          • Deanatay
            Deanatay
            September 24, 2014 at 9:00 pm | #

            Yes, Jen, we’ve lived long enough with your avatar to be aware of your inclinations on this subject.

            • Jen Aside
              Jen Aside
              September 26, 2014 at 12:27 am | #

              it’ll change soonish, actually

  56. WeezerLuvr3030
    WeezerLuvr3030
    September 24, 2014 at 2:36 pm | #

    There are so many layers to this critique of parenting styles that it would take generations just to sort them out.

  57. Betty Anne
    Betty Anne
    September 24, 2014 at 3:34 pm | #

    Mentioned it in reply to another comment, but oof does this one hit home a bit too much. :/ Mrs. Walkerton is totally my mom. :/

  58. Mass Confusion
    Mass Confusion
    September 24, 2014 at 5:21 pm | #

    Linda can sort of predict the future!

  59. Kugai
    Kugai
    September 24, 2014 at 7:15 pm | #

    Irony can be pretty ironic sometimes.

    • Jen Aside
      Jen Aside
      September 24, 2014 at 7:40 pm | #

      I think that’s the idea…?

  60. Henry
    Henry
    September 24, 2014 at 8:59 pm | #

    Because I find stupid things funny, I’m irrationally-amused by the fact that Sal’s initials spell out “SEW”. Y’know, something Sal probably wouldn’t be caught dead doing.

    Unless it was like, her wounds or something that she was sewing shut.

    • VOldFart
      VOldFart
      September 24, 2014 at 10:05 pm | #

      With porcupine quills held between her teeth.

  61. Hinoron
    Hinoron
    September 24, 2014 at 11:49 pm | #

    So, this is who planted the idea in Sally’s mind that knocking over convenience stores was a viable method to get Mommy’s attention from the Favored Child.

    Probably never would have occurred to her otherwise. Good work Mom.

  62. Maycroft
    Maycroft
    September 25, 2014 at 12:35 am | #

    Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahhaha!!!!

  63. TheMjohann
    TheMjohann
    September 25, 2014 at 4:24 pm | #

    Well this is what is wrong with the world today. In my days we played in playgrounds that had stuff you could fall off, sand instead of padded ground and all kinds of health hazards and we liked it that way!

  64. B.D
    B.D
    March 25, 2015 at 1:49 pm | #

    …Did Sal base her image off of Marcie?

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May 3, 2025 - FCBD @ Laughing Ogre Comics in Columbus, Ohio

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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 8h
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This is never going away, is it.
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 19h
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today in #9chickweedlane i learned we have to be shown children learning and relearning what sex is, for Reasons, even though they already clearly know and have prepared nuanced questions about it! also that Gran must hate, if she's still alive, how Old Juliette is the same but with gray hair
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
one of my favorite things is when a commenter explodes WHEN DO THESE CHARACTERS GET THERAPY but directed towards a character who canonically has a regular therapist
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
www.ebay.com/itm/23609624... Three hours left on this murder machine
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
mary: dawn says your girlfriend is trying to murder her wilbur: but what about MY happiness okay can we kill wilbur now
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
help I had a big yawny stretch after I got into bed and threw out my back
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fuck off
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Phew, they made NoHo Hank wear pants.
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Hot Toys Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith 1/6 Scale Darth Vader Deluxe ($495) & Standard ($315) is up for preorder at Sideshow - shrsl.com/4wcx6 #ad If you preorder make sure to hit the Exclusive versions since they include a commemorative plaque and cost the same.
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Ryan North @ryannorth.ca ⋅ 2d
hey, FANTASTIC FOUR got an Eisner nomination for best ongoing series!! I think this news is... really great! Fantastic even :0
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
I may have to pin this
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Politico: Ever been slapped by breasts?
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Who can forget the Swiss-Austrian Union, or its famous capital - Istanbul.
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