A YA F/F fantasy comic about Sonya, a lost skier trying to survive a snowy wilderness and find her way back to her village; and Kyra - a fire spirit trying to fix the home that she let fall apart around her.
Kiwi Blitz
Mary Cagle (Cube Watermelon)
Steffi thinks she can use her kiwi mech to become a superhero. This idea turns out to be very stupid.
Ghost Junk Sickness
Studio CARTRIDGE, Laura Lee
Two hunters try to survive and end up being pushed to pursue a deadly bounty dubbed "The Ghost".
Anarchy Dreamers
Emily Ree
Sparkly undead kids fight society's worst Nightmares in this pastel-punk urban fantasy coming-of-age!
[un]Divine
Ayme
A highschool senior thought giving up his soul for a demon was a good idea. It wasn't.
Real Science Adventures
Brian Clevinger
Spin off stories and other adventures from the world of Atomic Robo!
Cassiopeia Quinn
Gunwild, Psudonym
A cute, pantsless thief is pursued across the stars by a buttoned-up military officer in the spacey, laser-filled future.
Wilde Life
Pascalle Lepas
Oscar decided to rent an old haunted house, and that's when things got weird...
Demon's Mirror
Harry Bogosian
Based loosely off of "The Snow Queen", a story by Hans Christian Andersen, we see things take a different turn as the demons become central characters, and the side characters stick around. Yup, that's the only differences. Enjoy!
Sister Claire
Yamino
In the troubled aftermath of a great war between Witches and her fellow Nuns, novice Sister Claire just wants a purpose.
Stand Still, Stay Silent
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A few generations after the end of the world, a small, poorly financed research crew is sent out to rediscover whatever is left of the forbidden old world in the south.
Cyanide & Happiness
Explosm
Satire, dark humor and surreal humor.
Cut Time
Juby
Rel and her trusty avian friend Fugue are on a quest to save a world that's lost track of time. Follow them and their new recruits, in a story written with help from the stars.
Whomp!
Ronnie
A depressed, portly, hirsute anime fan stumbles through life in the ever-pursuit of chicken nuggets and other life-shortening indulgences.
Between Failures
Jackie Wohlenhaus
The low stakes adventures of an assorted group of 20 somethings trapped in the declining years of American retail. They are naughty and say lots of swears.
Sam & Fuzzy
Sam Logan
Troubled by gangster rodents, lovesick vampire stalkers, or confused ninja assassins? Don't panic! Sam and Fuzzy are here to help. (For a reasonable fee.)
Widdershins
Kate Ashwin
A series of light-hearted Victorian-era adventure stories featuring grumpy bounty hunters, accidental thiefkings, and more, in England's magical capital city Widdershins!
Jailbird
Charlie Davis
An all-ages comic about a recently escaped prisoner's struggle to understand the outside world, and vice-versa. Also, a magic cape!
Devil's Candy
Rem, Bikkuri
A lush fantasy about boy genius Kazu Decker, the girl he constructed for his 9th grade science project, and the world of devils and monsters they live in.
Hazy London
Scotty
A story about messy relationships. From friendly foes to crazy families. Nothing is black and white, just full of color. But, all colors can get a little hazy...
Fireweeds Moors
Gato Iberico
A cat-headed man and a girl with a sandwich hankering accidentally end up in a myth-infused country where magic chalices are a really big thing.
Monsterkind
Taylor C
Wallace Foster, a young, bright-eyed human social worker, has his entire world view rocked when he's suddenly relocated into a city primarily inhabited by monsters.
Guilded Age
T Campbell, John Waltrip, Florence Machina
Welcome to the saga of the working-class adventurer! Enjoy the complete story with new annotations daily!
Awaken
Koti Saavedra/Flipfloppery
Superpowers, monsters and conspiracies. Piras, the spoiled Dameschi heir, fights to recover his identity after becoming a terrorist!
Goodbye to Halos
Valerie Halla
Cuddles, gay flirting, weird feelings, and magic-fueled knife fights - it's an adventure across the queer multiverse!
Godslave
Meaghan Carter
Edith has been thrown into the dangerous world of modern-day Egyptian mythology. Fighting monsters and dealing with family drama of godly proportions.
Wychwood
Varethane
When Tiara's pyrokinesis is finally noticed, she is captured by a magical research organization for study. If she cooperates, she could be helping to save humanity from a dire threat - but can she trust them?
The Automan's Daughter
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Aisha Osman and her uncle Siddig outwit bikers, spies and kidnappers while gearing up for a showdown with the formidable Widowmaker mecha.
The End
August Brown, Cory Brown
Two aliens crash a sci-fi convention and accidentally take seven nerds on an adventure that spans the galaxy!
Star Impact
Jack McGee
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Caramel Corn
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Sarah is the only human left in a world full of mythical creatures and monsters. All she wants to do is live a quiet life, but everything changes when she meets her guardian angel, Jacob.
Atomic Robo
Brian Clevinger, Scott Wegener
The robot punches monsters and bad robots and one time he was a cowboy.
Sufficiently Remarkable
Maki Naro
Two young women living in Brooklyn discover that you're always coming of age.
Lilith's Word
inkPangur
If you had the power to make any wish come true using just one word, what would you say?
Lighter Than Heir
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A young Volant woman joins the military in an effort to upstage her war-hero father.
Empowered
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A sexy superhero comedy (except when it isn't) about the never-ending struggles of a plucky but very unlucky young superheroine.
Go Get a Roomie
Clover
Experience the queer journey of an upbeat hippie and the friendships she makes along the way! A tale of self-discovery and love of many forms.
Alice and the Nightmare
Misha Krivanek
Alice finally attends University to learn to collect the dreams of humans, meet new friends, and deal with a pesky reflection along the way.
Tigress Queen
Allison Shaw
A barbarian warlord and a pampered prince try to avoid a marriage alliance that could end decades of violence.
Star Trip
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Jas is a human taken from her home planet on a trip across the galaxy she will never forget.
Monster Pulse
Magnolia Porter Siddell
Four kids run afoul of a creepy secret organization's experiments, which turn their body parts into fighting monsters. Part sentimental coming-of-age story, part monster-training shonen manga, with just a bit of sci-fi body horror.
The Sanity Circus
Windy
Magic, monsters and mysteries await in the odd city of Sanity. It's up to Attley and a colorful group of characters to find out just what is going on.
Never Satisfied
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Lucy Marlowe, a magician's apprentice, competes against other apprentices for an important, magical, Goverment Job.
Nerf Now!!
Josué Pereira
A cute webcomic about fanservice, video games, and... love. Mostly video games, though.
Astral Aves
Moon Cabal
A fantasy coming-of-age following the adventures of Astra The Black and friends, as they navigate the mysterious world around them. It's politics, adventure, and the supernatural; oh, and crazy hair.
El Goonish Shive
Dan Shive
WARNING: This comic often ignores the Laws of Physics
The Witch Door
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Katariina Lehto discovers her neighbor is a witch called Jousia Muotka. Jousia introduces Katariina to the strange people and places beyond the witch door...
Starhammer
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A teen girl inherits a powerful alien artifact and proceeds to make a series of increasingly poor decisions
Love Not Found
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Abeille is on a quest to find someone who wants to do it the old-fashioned way in a time when touching has become outdated.
This is Not Fiction
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What do you do when the person you're in-love with is an anonymous romance novelist? Get your best friend to hire your worst enemy for help!
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Wilfrid's humble quest for revenge becomes bigger and bloodier by the day.
Dumbing of Age
David M Willis
Joyce has been homeschooled her entire life until now, when she's suddenly a freshman in college! Things don't go well.
The Lonely Vincent Bellingham
Diana Huh
Vincent is an unkind man looking to disappear, and finds himself in the care of a vampire and her two wicked children.
Girl Genius
Phil Foglio, Kaja Foglio
In a time when the Industrial Revolution has become an all-out war, Mad Science rules the World...with mixed success.
Paranatural
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Superpowered middle schoolers fight evil spirits in their rural hometown. Come for the jokes, stay for the cast, the creatures, and the mystery that ties them all together!
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…The surgeon must have taken a…non-traditional route to his appendix if the scar wound up so far from its normal location. Perhaps he-or-she too was distracted by other aspects of Jason’s anatomy.
Wait, what about Mexicans? Cuz I’ve never been hungover but I’m sure I remember we’re supposed to handle booze not so well. I used to drink a lot, no beers, mostly vodka and other heavy stuff since it takes a while for me to get buzzed.
It depends on when your ancestors first started drinking alcohol. If it was relatively early in human history, you may have some genes that give you better tolerance of alcohol. Even if you do have such genes, alcohol is still far from harmless, however.
Me, too, and I’m a very cheap drunk. Mind you, I don’t drink that often either, so my system isn’t used to it. Mind you, I sober up again pretty quickly, so there’s that.
LOL Daniel the Human is actually allergic to alcohol. The smell hits him like a truck at times :P. He’s gotta be careful when moving wine glasses around or the fumes may cause problems. Primus help him if anyone spiked his drink…
Just give him bushier hair and take it easy on the 5 o clock shadow Bam! Exact look a like… Be funny if she pointed this out and started to bongo the guy out for all her Dady issues and the guys just standing there like “what?”
The permanent layer of McNugget grease that coats his stomach lining deflects the alcohol like oil deflecting water, preventing any of it from being absorbed into his bloodstream. He can only derive moisture from corrosive liquids, like soft drinks, which is why he requires so much Mountain Dew.
Yes, but McNugget grease is not technically fat. It is made from a non-organic waxy substance, which McDonalds holds the patent on. Its origin is unknown and highly classified, although leaked company memos reveal that harvesting it involves providing Grimace with bran muffins and a newspaper.
Now I really want to get my hands on ethanol and some saran wrap, just to see if one is soluble in the other. Wonder if Everclear would work, despite all that water.
Ethanol is polar, but what makes water so resistant to interacting with fat is the fact that it forms hydrogen bonds with itself so easily. Ethanol can too, but to a much lesser extent thank to that pesky ethyl group. So, ethanol will pass through some surfaces that are watertight. Well, relatively watertight.
You know the bitter flavor is the result of adding hops during the fermentation and aging processes, right? You can totally home brew as much beer as you can drink without hops, just malt and water to make the wort, then ferment and enjoy (quickly, the hops act as a preservative)
Turns out the next slipshine is Jason/bar guy/(Sal passed out in the corner, but left alone because these guys aren’t monsters or anything) and the poll was a red herring.
Half way through Sal wakes up and is all “naw c’mon guys pay attention t’ME” and then they give her all the hugs.
Jason/Bar Dude/Sal three way hug session, yessss.
Sal doesn’t hold her drinks well. Humm. That surprises me.
So now Sal will tick off someone, Jason will have to defend her.
She won’t remember anything.
Back to square one.
Heh heh heh, Daniel the Human has to watch out for that kinda problem too, getting hit by some drunk’s breath. He can be in a room/train railcar with a drunk bad enough you can smell it several meters away, but if so he has to watch what his senses are doing, so it doesn’t get to him.
He has stared down a drunk right in his face, trying to start a fight, but had to sit afterwards cause his head threatened to start spinning…
Looks to me like Sal’s the same. Maybe she should have an allergy test too, see if alcohol sets off the alarm too…
Then I wonder what mine must be made of, given that I’ve drunk an entire bottle of whiskey more than once, and have been known to drink more than an entire fifth of straight vodka, and still be able to walk.
I’ve only had a hangover once, which I didn’t at all enjoy. This would include the time I drank enough in one go to trash my stomach lining and couldn’t eat or drink anything but water for two weeks. Felt fine, the next day.
I…started being careful about how much I drank at one go, after that.
Black Russian = vodka and Kahlua
White Russian = add milk or cream to above
Blonde Russian – vodka, Kahlua, and Bailey’s (or equivalent)
Mad Russian = vodka, Kahlua, and Red Bull (milk or cream optional)
Like brother like sister, I would Paste the “It’s Walky” strip of Walky drinking for the first time but Willis hasn’t gotten to the point of reposting it yet.
I’ve heard studies that dudes with the smallest penises tend to have the most sexually satisfied lady-partners of anyone.
(Theory is that they become really, really good at oral and such. Whereas many dudes with big schlongs — except for Zach’s dude, of course — assume that they can just show up and their big magical dick will automatically satisfy their partner, like in porn, which is very rarely the case in real life.)
It also has to do with the fact that larger (specifically, longer) phalluses generally have difficulty maintaining erection and have issues with achieving as firm an erection, are generally painful since they go in farther rather than wider (thus not necessarily being ‘more filling’ but rather just more intrusive), etc.
Basically, long phalluses are always a no-no.
Wide ones tend to get more varying answers.
I also wonder if Jason’s dad is similar. If so, he may have had to resort to an insemination strategy used by elephants – just spray in the general direction of your target. Or use a pippette.
You know that if the couple in that comic had ever managed to accomplish penetration they would have been locked together until he lost his erection, unable to move more than the elasticity of their combined organs. That would have been most unsexy.
I know that their relationship is very Not Good because student/TA = no, but damn if I don’t love the dynamic that they have, with the gives no fucks rebel and the stick in the mud proper guy, with all of the moments that they exasperate each other, and then whatever this is. Whatever this is is hilarious.
I agree with everything you just said. I love how both of them cling oh-so-hard to their dignity and pride (Jason to his proper behavior, Sal to her aloof coolness) and how both of them occasionally fail to uphold it. Jason in this strip is epic.
For a minute I thought that Sal was literally apologising to Jason’s trousers for having to hold all of that in, as opposed to apologising for originally using the word ‘pants’ instead.
Now I can’t help but think of Sal, in a blue and highlighter-yellow suit with shoulder pads, telling crappy jokes with a terrifying wooden dummy. Thanks for that.
I’m going to need an ear-funnel and a case full of bleach to get this one out.
Jason, I couldn’t care less about the size itself, but if your penis is wide enough that it has the proportions of a beer glass, I am legitimately frightened of you.
Women can safely pass an object the size of a slow-pitch softball through that area, some with room to spare, some not so much. Something the size of a British Pint glass’ base would not be difficult.
Scroll down a bit, people already linked to the previous sexcapades.
She tops in each bit we see, so unless Slipshine ‘flips things over’, a pretty safe guess.
I view Sal as a deconstruction of the cool, badass loner character. She practically exudes coolness looks good no matter what, smokes, drinks, snarks at people, doesn’t put up with their bullshit, can take people in a fight, and even her only having a single friend in Marcie could be construed as Sal being “too cool” to make friends.
But then you delve into her screentime in the comic and Sal is deeply lonely, hurt by her parents racism while desperate for their acknowledgement, traded sex for grades and seems to expect people want *something* out of her if they pay attention (which makes me wonder what the fuck happened at her boarding school), ignores people in social settings, straightens her hair because she wants it to look whiter, and makes a complete ass of herself when she drinks. She’s nowhere near what Joyce idolizes her to be, and I think soon she’s going to go through some major shit with Amber.
Wait, did I miss something? When did they actually hook up? I just remember the antagonism before the test and her stalking away then coming back to get a good grade and bragging about it.
Well, true, but the point I was making was two different times and two different locations.
Although you could just barely tell it from the clothes they were (not) wearing (Sal had on a tank-top prior to the second round of bonky-tonkin’).
… Okay, I know that “Sirsly” is just her Southern accent + drunk thing going on, but I’m still amused that Willis just basically name-dropped his first comic in a scenario the Willis of that era would probably go catatonic in shock to see himself writing. And then, if his religious terror experience and mine are at all similar, prayed compulsively every thirty seconds for days on end because what if the last one wasn’t good enough and now I’ve started a new one I can’t just stop praying or else God’ll hear all my thoughts and they’re awful and…
Every so often, it really strikes me just how much of a nervous wreck I was between the ages of nine and thirteen or so and how much I actually have improved in a few respects.
Speaking as someone in academia, I hope Jason has his resume updated. Because I’m assuming they’re at a campus bar, and (at least in the real world) his ass is gonna get canned.
Knowing those two, I think they’d have the paranoia/ presence of mind to get some distance away for drinking.
Granted, that’d make getting back tricky, given the established friendlessness…
Keep in mind that Jason delegated all of her work to a different TA; in any campus I went to [and I went to/interacted with several (6 or 7 :X) – though in fairness, most were community colleges], that would have been acceptable, as he did not have direct supervision of her grade assignment. So long as he doesn’t directly interact with her assignments and their grading, he doesn’t even need to report the relationship (as per the linked, totally random school site I found).
Though, depending on state, if she’s only 17, that, however, could be an issue.
In any case, generally, from what I’ve picked up, TAs have pretty lenient restrictions on their dating habits.
It’s really funny you pointed to Northwestern, of all places. XD
But, pretty much everywhere I’ve heard of (including NU), relationships between students and Professors/TAs is pretty strictly against the rules if they have “evaluative, supervisory, or instructional authority” over the student. Even voluntarily giving up her grading to someone else, it’s hard to argue he doesn’t; there’s kind of an inherent potential for bias there, to say nothing of the potential imbalance in power. (There’s actually a recent trend at some universities to prohibit relationships between any Professor and student, not just those they’re currently teaching.)
Either way, at the very very least, I imagine Jason would be having a variety of hard conversations with the higher-ups and muckity-mucks at IU.
But yeah, from what little interaction I’ve had with that [can’t say I’ve boinked any educational staff myself], it’s always been a ‘okay to have a relationship with students not in your class [professor] or if you report it’/’okay to have a relationship with students in your class [TA] if you don’t have an effect on their grades’.
Though in fairness, I think all the circumstances I’m aware of, they had the relationships before the class began, and entered the class with that understanding [sort of like having a family member (eg child) in your class].
Starting the relationship while the student is in your class does seem really questionable.
Though if Penny and her comments are any indication, I doubt the school staff’ll care too much. They might even throw him a party :X
Well, there’s one question answered: they will not have sex tonight.
It would be kinda sweet if Jason let Sal sleep it off on his couch. Or he might be more chivalrous than I expect and give her the bed while taking the couch himself. He will definitely not be interested in trespassing onto the dorms to help a sloshed underage student find her room. Hey, maybe the two of them will run into certain people on their way back from a sushi restaurant! That would be gloriously awkward.
“Hey, Bowtie, what do you think you are doing with my sister”
“Booooooffin'”
“We are NOT ‘boffin’ or knobbin’ or any other activity without a properly pronounced ending.”
“Heh, I know all’bout your endin'”
“That doesn’t even make sense.”
Sal has to sober up considerably before Jason will even vaguely consider sexual performings, and I’m not sure he’s desperate enough to wait around until she’s able to give consent.
My bad, forgot to leave out the drunk part of the “near/drunk sex”. Him still being sober cancels out the drunk sex part. Near sex, then sober up, feels, so on…
Worked last night, still haven’t had a recharge, head’s not clicking at full speed right now…
Come to think of it, the “near sex” part could be something less sex-like. I guess bonding moment would be a better choice of words. Something to bring them a bit closer outside the classroom & tutoring, Sal sobers up, so on, so forth…
Daniel the Human’s brother sent me a short video of some lady on a roadside. Butt naked. Parading & showing everything for all the cars to see. She then goes up to the car that’s taping, takes a Victoria Bitter bottle & gets it surprisingly deep before the car drives off…
You Humans are weird, but that’s why I like you so much…
The only thing better than Jason NOT hitting us over the head with ‘I’M BRITISH!” dialogue is drunk Sal sort-of feeding into sort-of skewering the foible.
Welp someone has been getting cervical brusing jfc. And…I don’t THINK dicks can be that wide? Can they? I’m not a penis girth expert here. But damn can you imagine trying to blow a dick like that, if she IS being literal?
today in #9chickweedlane i learned we have to be shown children learning and relearning what sex is, for Reasons, even though they already clearly know and have prepared nuanced questions about it!
also that Gran must hate, if she's still alive, how Old Juliette is the same but with gray hair
one of my favorite things is when a commenter explodes WHEN DO THESE CHARACTERS GET THERAPY but directed towards a character who canonically has a regular therapist
Hot Toys Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith 1/6 Scale Darth Vader Deluxe ($495) & Standard ($315) is up for preorder at Sideshow - shrsl.com/4wcx6 #ad
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btw if you're one of those rando bluesky weirdos who doesn't know me but sees me in the wild being sarcastic and don't know i'm being sarcastic because you haven't taken like 30 seconds to, like, maybe look at my user profile or something, keep walking, you're not going to score internet points here
Here's an entertaining cite at the bottom of the first page
Josh Gerstein@joshgerstein.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
JUST IN: Milwaukee Judge Hannah Dugan moves to dismiss federal criminal case against her for allegedly helping immigrant hide from ICE. Her lawyers say she's protected by official acts & judicial immunity and 10th Amendment. Doc: storage.courtlistener.com/recap/gov.us...
Where did Hollywood go so wrong? I thought movies were supposed to be an escape from reality, a chance to put your worries aside and not have to think about any underlying ideas or concepts. Well, not anymore.
theonion.com/you-can...
It's not a new argument, of course, but Chesterton dismissed it effectively in 1908.
"You will hear everlastingly... this argument that the rich man cannot be bribed. The fact is, of course, that the rich man is bribed; he has been bribed already. That is why he is a rich man."
Aaron Rupar@atrupar.com ⋅ 2d
Hawley dismisses Trump lining his pockets with his memecoin: "Listen, I think nobody believes that Donald Trump can be bought. I mean, what does Donald Trump need more money for?"
wilbur, savvy enough to know he's in a comic strip but still not a great actor, awkwardly lifts a muffin up into frame so that we, the audience, understand that he has a muffin right now, which is very important narratively, but he's not really selling it well as an organic, human action
she’s actual size, but she seems much bigger to me
big men often tremble as they step aside
I thought I was big once.
She changed my mind.
…That was before the accident…
I wish I was big.
“Big” is relative. All guys are big…compared to an ant, as a for instance.
Everything is big compared to planck length. No really. EVERYTHING.
There are rabbit men, deer men, and elephant men.
Fortunately, also rabbit women, deer women, and elephant women. Choose wisely (and not necessarily heterosexually!).
What about particle men, triangle men, universe men, and person men?
Universe man is as big as the universe, man.
Don’t forget the starmen
Squares may look distant in her rear view mirror
Squares in the rear view mirror may appear closer than they are.
Why is Sal so obsessed with the size of Jason’s appendectomy scar?
cause she can’t see it normally, she has to part the massive dong obscuring it.
She loves that scar.
…The surgeon must have taken a…non-traditional route to his appendix if the scar wound up so far from its normal location. Perhaps he-or-she too was distracted by other aspects of Jason’s anatomy.
She has to PART the dong? Oh god, why…
I said something else originally then realized the mental image that phrasing would give people was just BETTER.
So it appears the vaunted Walkerton lack of capacity for alcohol is a multiversal constant after all.
is this the first time lapse in all of doa
Nah, there was a much larger skip for when Walky got his pajama jeans.
And when Dorothy was studying a few nights in a row until Parent Day arrived.
Even Willis cannot hold back time forever…
No, Bille has lapsed from her abstinence from alcohol, so this lapse is not a first time for this strip.
Sal lacks the Scottish/Irish blood needed to handle a lot of booze.
Or Russian/Polish. That’s me. Never been hungover despite dirnking decent amounts of alcohol many times and hoping my 18th won’t change that
Wait, what about Mexicans? Cuz I’ve never been hungover but I’m sure I remember we’re supposed to handle booze not so well. I used to drink a lot, no beers, mostly vodka and other heavy stuff since it takes a while for me to get buzzed.
It depends on when your ancestors first started drinking alcohol. If it was relatively early in human history, you may have some genes that give you better tolerance of alcohol. Even if you do have such genes, alcohol is still far from harmless, however.
Please. My wife is English/German, and she’s done after one drink.
That is why I said may. It is not true for everyone of a particular background, just more likely relatively speaking.
I know a Brittany person that can barely get a single beer before getting drunk, and it’s hilarous
Me, too, and I’m a very cheap drunk. Mind you, I don’t drink that often either, so my system isn’t used to it. Mind you, I sober up again pretty quickly, so there’s that.
LOL Daniel the Human is actually allergic to alcohol. The smell hits him like a truck at times :P. He’s gotta be careful when moving wine glasses around or the fumes may cause problems. Primus help him if anyone spiked his drink…
Alcohol hits Ruth like a truck too…
i must have gotten the alcoholics super lottery then: german, scottish, irish and swedish. I still have no idea what a hangover feels like
pshhh you northerners, when you can drink like a Greek/Italian, then come see me
That would make Sumerians and Egyptians the ones with the highest alcohol tolerance, they have archeological evidence of beer brewing before 4K BCE.
Evidence!? Arse!
If… if this is accurate then I applaud the limey Brit on being well endowed. Damn.
Seeing as how Sal’s inebriated enough to touch him with other people around, it’s doubtful.
I won’t make the easy joke, I won’t make the easy joke, I won’t make the easy joke…
Why even resist?
Your avatar makes it seem kinda redundant anyway.
It’s apparently not such an easy joke that I know what joke you’re valiantly not making.
I’m assuming it has something to do with the Big Man On Campus, or something along those lines.
What easy joke?
Why did the chicken cross the road?
What’s really awkward is Sal saying all this to who appears to be her father.
Just give him bushier hair and take it easy on the 5 o clock shadow Bam! Exact look a like… Be funny if she pointed this out and started to bongo the guy out for all her Dady issues and the guys just standing there like “what?”
That would be … hilarious. I wish that would happen. Also I love the “Bongo” filter is still in effect.
Still needs some gray hair, though.
Naw, this dude looks more like some Middle Eastern flavor of person. Sal/Walky’s dad is a more vibrant shade of brown.
Glad to know some things are constant throughout all incarnations.
Took the words right out of my mouth.
Though having said that, now it’ll turn out it’s impossible to get Walky drunk.
The permanent layer of McNugget grease that coats his stomach lining deflects the alcohol like oil deflecting water, preventing any of it from being absorbed into his bloodstream. He can only derive moisture from corrosive liquids, like soft drinks, which is why he requires so much Mountain Dew.
This has been Real Science®, with Doctor_Who.
I’d believe it.
I must correct you, for alcohol, like THC, is fat soluble. Walky’s stomach is lined with a plastick like saram wrap.
Come on, like Doritos are chemicly organic…
Yes, but McNugget grease is not technically fat. It is made from a non-organic waxy substance, which McDonalds holds the patent on. Its origin is unknown and highly classified, although leaked company memos reveal that harvesting it involves providing Grimace with bran muffins and a newspaper.
This has been Real Science®, with Doctor_Who.
“non-organic waxy substance”.
Sorry, stopped reading right there. You can’t get much more organic than wax!
I really, really wish we could all agree on one definition of “organic”. It drives me nuts, in case you haven’t notced.
I think that’s why he said _non-organic_ waxy substance. It behaves like wax, but with no carbon, hydrogen, or oxygen in it.
It can have hydrogen or oxygen! Just no carbon.
Now I really want to get my hands on ethanol and some saran wrap, just to see if one is soluble in the other. Wonder if Everclear would work, despite all that water.
That’s weird. Alcohol’s polar, isn’t it? Shouldn’t fat be non-polar?
Sure, there’s oxygen atoms, but they’re surrounded on both ends by a bunch of carbon and hydrogen.
Unless the fact that the carbon and hydrogen lie more on one end than the other causes a bit of polarity.
Ethanol is polar, but what makes water so resistant to interacting with fat is the fact that it forms hydrogen bonds with itself so easily. Ethanol can too, but to a much lesser extent thank to that pesky ethyl group. So, ethanol will pass through some surfaces that are watertight. Well, relatively watertight.
For a moment I thought that Jason’s Bicep was the constant across universes.
bet he hates beer, anyway.
It’s not for everyone. The stuff’s joy to make, but I never cared for bitter flavors or carbonation.
You know the bitter flavor is the result of adding hops during the fermentation and aging processes, right? You can totally home brew as much beer as you can drink without hops, just malt and water to make the wort, then ferment and enjoy (quickly, the hops act as a preservative)
Guy on the right is disturbed, but intrigued.
But is he aroused? Not that I care to look.
It’ds much easier to tell with Jason.
He’s like “I should get away from the drunk couple before it turns ugly, but I really want to know where this is going.”
Can’t blame him there.
Turns out the next slipshine is Jason/bar guy/(Sal passed out in the corner, but left alone because these guys aren’t monsters or anything) and the poll was a red herring.
Make it so XD
It’s… a possibility I would appreciate to see if Sal/Jason is indeed a red herring…
On a side-note, I love Sal correcting herself about the trousers
Half way through Sal wakes up and is all “naw c’mon guys pay attention t’ME” and then they give her all the hugs.
Jason/Bar Dude/Sal three way hug session, yessss.
Hah, such a nice throwback. Sal Sal Sal…
I missed the drunk Walkerton twins. Now I want to see Walky drunk.
Also for some reason have started to respect Jason more.
When and how? He hasn’t really changed that much from when we established why most people aren’t fond of him.
Respect was earned from putting up with inebriated Sal’s shenanigans.
Sal doesn’t hold her drinks well. Humm. That surprises me.
So now Sal will tick off someone, Jason will have to defend her.
She won’t remember anything.
Back to square one.
Sal needs to learn from Billie, she can hold her liquor.
Those two really need to get drunk together.
Given their respective alcohol tolerances, I think if Billie had landed that kiss, that would have been sufficient to get Sal drunk with her.
I’m almost surprised Sal didn’t get drunk off of her breath alone.
The real reason she always leaves the room except when she passes out in it: The alcohol fumes get her tipsy.
Heh heh heh, Daniel the Human has to watch out for that kinda problem too, getting hit by some drunk’s breath. He can be in a room/train railcar with a drunk bad enough you can smell it several meters away, but if so he has to watch what his senses are doing, so it doesn’t get to him.
He has stared down a drunk right in his face, trying to start a fight, but had to sit afterwards cause his head threatened to start spinning…
Looks to me like Sal’s the same. Maybe she should have an allergy test too, see if alcohol sets off the alarm too…
Billie’s liver is apparently made of adamantium, given that she can reportedly drink an entire bottle of whiskey in one go without dying.
Then I wonder what mine must be made of, given that I’ve drunk an entire bottle of whiskey more than once, and have been known to drink more than an entire fifth of straight vodka, and still be able to walk.
I’ve only had a hangover once, which I didn’t at all enjoy. This would include the time I drank enough in one go to trash my stomach lining and couldn’t eat or drink anything but water for two weeks. Felt fine, the next day.
I…started being careful about how much I drank at one go, after that.
I have never wanted a heterosexual Slipshine more than I do in this moment.
Well, aside from my theoretical, “Joe Bangs Everyone,” but that’s really closer to omnisexual than anything else.
“The Biggest Bang”
Cue “I don’t want relationship. I just want bang bang bang.”
Oh man now I really want “Joe bangs everyone: all the threesomes” and “Mike bangs everyone, including your mom”
“Joe Bangs Everyone, the Never-ending Conga Line”
Slipshine can’t survive on 5 cent subscriptions.
“Joe Joes Jacksonville”
Just now, I realized Sal and Jason are two of my favorite DoA characters.
Sal was already my favourite, but she just became more my favourite.
Right?!
your icon makes me smile, because I’m imaging that Penny now ships those two. XP
I think she does.
Who’da thought a motorcycle enthusiast would be a size queen?
It’s not the CCs, it’s the RPMs.
It’s not the schnieder of the rider, it’s the veering of the steering
It’s not the ship in the slip, it’s the motion of the ocean.
Also… I don’t think any Brit appreciates Yankin’ in any capacity…
She doesn’t hold her chocolate milk well, Jason. It’s been well established that she’s drinking chocolate milk.
Chocolate milk with several shots of Kahlua…
So, does that make it a Black Russian or a White Russian?
(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Black_Russian http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/White_Russian_%28cocktail%29 tldr White Russians have the dairy, Blacks don’t, but chocolate milk is black, ergo madness.)
It’s almost a mudslide (just add Irish Cream)
Black Russian = vodka and Kahlua
White Russian = add milk or cream to above
Blonde Russian – vodka, Kahlua, and Bailey’s (or equivalent)
Mad Russian = vodka, Kahlua, and Red Bull (milk or cream optional)
Colorado Bulldog (which I occasionally call a Dirty Russian) – vodka, Kahlua, milk or cream, Coca-Cola
Tonight we learn interesting things about Jason, yay!
Well, *THIS* went to hell in a hurry.
Like brother like sister, I would Paste the “It’s Walky” strip of Walky drinking for the first time but Willis hasn’t gotten to the point of reposting it yet.
Is she indicating that Jason’s penis is the size of that glass she’s holding?
E-yup. Seems scary and inconvenient to me, but different strokes for different folks.
Wonder if having penetrative sex taken off the table for him has driven Jason to become exceptionally skilled at other forms of sex?
My man is just thicker than my wrist.
Yes it has.
I’ve heard studies that dudes with the smallest penises tend to have the most sexually satisfied lady-partners of anyone.
(Theory is that they become really, really good at oral and such. Whereas many dudes with big schlongs — except for Zach’s dude, of course — assume that they can just show up and their big magical dick will automatically satisfy their partner, like in porn, which is very rarely the case in real life.)
It also has to do with the fact that larger (specifically, longer) phalluses generally have difficulty maintaining erection and have issues with achieving as firm an erection, are generally painful since they go in farther rather than wider (thus not necessarily being ‘more filling’ but rather just more intrusive), etc.
Basically, long phalluses are always a no-no.
Wide ones tend to get more varying answers.
*The topic here isn’t necessarily longer ones, but that’s generally the correlation when ‘large size’ is referenced.
Being bar glass width might be a bit extreme in any circumstance, though.
I’m pretty sure it’s specifically not off the table.
Which explains why both are hanging around each other still.
On the table, under the table, on top of the math books…
I see what you did there…
I got video to prove it…
I also wonder if Jason’s dad is similar. If so, he may have had to resort to an insemination strategy used by elephants – just spray in the general direction of your target. Or use a pippette.
Hah, different strokes, I get it!
Unless we’ve all thoroughly and massively misunderstood this strip, yes.
Ah. Just making sure I’m on the same page as everybody.
I had rejected that as impossible—the meaning . . . and the measurement, too.
“Interesting. My vagina is glass-shaped also but faces in the exact opposite direction.”
There was an Oglaf comic recently about that very subject, except cones… Not going to link Oglaf here obviously.
I know, I was quoting it directly.
You know that if the couple in that comic had ever managed to accomplish penetration they would have been locked together until he lost his erection, unable to move more than the elasticity of their combined organs. That would have been most unsexy.
I believe that reference is, in fact, the source of humor that prompted the comment to which you replied.
Man, that’s wordy. And I’m too asleep to at least Mojo Jojo-ify it.
At first I thought she was comparing it to Jason’s forearm, I hadn’t even noticed the glass until now…
Welp, as the saying goes: Sal, you’re drunk, go home.
I know that their relationship is very Not Good because student/TA = no, but damn if I don’t love the dynamic that they have, with the gives no fucks rebel and the stick in the mud proper guy, with all of the moments that they exasperate each other, and then whatever this is. Whatever this is is hilarious.
I agree with everything you just said. I love how both of them cling oh-so-hard to their dignity and pride (Jason to his proper behavior, Sal to her aloof coolness) and how both of them occasionally fail to uphold it. Jason in this strip is epic.
I concur. I concur so very hard.
And on top of it all, they’re hot!
Sal is hot on top.
Now I believe the proper term is pantaloons.
Only if your a clown.
Furthering their Pygmallion dynamic, Sal gets her musical number, “I’ve grown accustomed to your dong”.
Congratulations on making me burst into a weird laughter while sitting at work.
I f-ing LOVE Jason and Sal! OTP right here!
A rebel gets drunk and babbles to strangers about her sex life. Forget sleeping with gloves and having a motorcycle – this stuff is hard core.
For a minute I thought that Sal was literally apologising to Jason’s trousers for having to hold all of that in, as opposed to apologising for originally using the word ‘pants’ instead.
haha, I like that better
Not Trousers…. Knickers!
And it’s nice to see that liquor helps Sal to reminisce fondly….
I missed who’s a top, actually.
Sal naturally. ^_^
On the one hand, I want to point out that Top and Bottom is not necessarily obvious based on personality.
…but yeah, definitely Sal.
Documentation!
Exactly!
Pants in England refer to underwear, so pants are the correct term, not trousers.
Trousers could still work if he’s going commando.
How can they talk while drinking? Why aren’t they doing a team ventriloquist act? This would be entertainment GOLD, people!! Call Vegas!
Now I can’t help but think of Sal, in a blue and highlighter-yellow suit with shoulder pads, telling crappy jokes with a terrifying wooden dummy. Thanks for that.
I’m going to need an ear-funnel and a case full of bleach to get this one out.
Jason, I couldn’t care less about the size itself, but if your penis is wide enough that it has the proportions of a beer glass, I am legitimately frightened of you.
Welp, since they’re well ahead in the next Slipshine poll we should get to see if she’s representing his girth accurately soon enough!
I4m fairly sure she’s exagerrating ._.
One would think. Unless Sal has been suffering from internal organ damage.
Women can safely pass an object the size of a slow-pitch softball through that area, some with room to spare, some not so much. Something the size of a British Pint glass’ base would not be difficult.
At first it would be! But given time, you’d get used to it.
The shipping must be destroyed!
“It might be nice to know something about each other beyond who’s a top”? Well, I’d guess Sal would top, but just how kinky did these two get?
Scroll down a bit, people already linked to the previous sexcapades.
She tops in each bit we see, so unless Slipshine ‘flips things over’, a pretty safe guess.
Slightly incapacitated by laughter.
[insert joke about how the English call sausages “bangers”]
Now who’d like a banger in the mouth?
It’s the WRONG trousers, Jason!
Kudos on the Wallace and Grommit reference.
Thanks!
Oh my.
I am so glad that we now know Sal still can’t handle her drink, because badass Sal not being able to is even funnier.
I know, right. It also makes her more human, and makes us remember just how young she is.
I view Sal as a deconstruction of the cool, badass loner character. She practically exudes coolness looks good no matter what, smokes, drinks, snarks at people, doesn’t put up with their bullshit, can take people in a fight, and even her only having a single friend in Marcie could be construed as Sal being “too cool” to make friends.
But then you delve into her screentime in the comic and Sal is deeply lonely, hurt by her parents racism while desperate for their acknowledgement, traded sex for grades and seems to expect people want *something* out of her if they pay attention (which makes me wonder what the fuck happened at her boarding school), ignores people in social settings, straightens her hair because she wants it to look whiter, and makes a complete ass of herself when she drinks. She’s nowhere near what Joyce idolizes her to be, and I think soon she’s going to go through some major shit with Amber.
LMAO
Well done Jason and well done Sal because if a girls going to get drunk and embarrassing then thats how they should be doing it
Wait, did I miss something? When did they actually hook up? I just remember the antagonism before the test and her stalking away then coming back to get a good grade and bragging about it.
Or is she just drunkenly making stuff up?
This: http://www.dumbingofage.com/2013/comic/book-3/01-if-the-shoes-split/whatsallthis/ and this: http://www.dumbingofage.com/2013/comic/book-3/03-answers-in-hennessy/altercation-2/
There was a strip heavily implying that they got the hanky-panky on. Which is a bit of an understatement, really.
On two different occasions, actually
It started with this.
And continued with this a little later.
I’d say the continuation concluded there, and started here…
Well, true, but the point I was making was two different times and two different locations.
Although you could just barely tell it from the clothes they were (not) wearing (Sal had on a tank-top prior to the second round of bonky-tonkin’).
I have been voting for the Sal/Jason Slipshine since the beginning but now I REALLY want it.
That is WAY more than I wanted to know about Jason.
Your Grav couldn’t be a better reflection of what you’re saying.
Tedd’d probably want to know, though.
Er-
For science?
… Okay, I know that “Sirsly” is just her Southern accent + drunk thing going on, but I’m still amused that Willis just basically name-dropped his first comic in a scenario the Willis of that era would probably go catatonic in shock to see himself writing. And then, if his religious terror experience and mine are at all similar, prayed compulsively every thirty seconds for days on end because what if the last one wasn’t good enough and now I’ve started a new one I can’t just stop praying or else God’ll hear all my thoughts and they’re awful and…
Every so often, it really strikes me just how much of a nervous wreck I was between the ages of nine and thirteen or so and how much I actually have improved in a few respects.
The nice part of this exchange is that Jason is actually referring to her as ‘Sal’ now, rather than ‘Ms. Walters’.
She’s Ms. Walkerton in this universe. “Walters” is Beef’s name.
Speaking as someone in academia, I hope Jason has his resume updated. Because I’m assuming they’re at a campus bar, and (at least in the real world) his ass is gonna get canned.
Knowing those two, I think they’d have the paranoia/ presence of mind to get some distance away for drinking.
Granted, that’d make getting back tricky, given the established friendlessness…
I’ve never heard that before, your campus must be more strict than most.
(eg http://www.northwestern.edu/womenscenter/issues-information/sexual-harassment/student-faculty-relationships.html ) from a quick google search.
Keep in mind that Jason delegated all of her work to a different TA; in any campus I went to [and I went to/interacted with several (6 or 7 :X) – though in fairness, most were community colleges], that would have been acceptable, as he did not have direct supervision of her grade assignment. So long as he doesn’t directly interact with her assignments and their grading, he doesn’t even need to report the relationship (as per the linked, totally random school site I found).
Though, depending on state, if she’s only 17, that, however, could be an issue.
In any case, generally, from what I’ve picked up, TAs have pretty lenient restrictions on their dating habits.
It’s really funny you pointed to Northwestern, of all places. XD
But, pretty much everywhere I’ve heard of (including NU), relationships between students and Professors/TAs is pretty strictly against the rules if they have “evaluative, supervisory, or instructional authority” over the student. Even voluntarily giving up her grading to someone else, it’s hard to argue he doesn’t; there’s kind of an inherent potential for bias there, to say nothing of the potential imbalance in power. (There’s actually a recent trend at some universities to prohibit relationships between any Professor and student, not just those they’re currently teaching.)
Either way, at the very very least, I imagine Jason would be having a variety of hard conversations with the higher-ups and muckity-mucks at IU.
Fair enough
But yeah, from what little interaction I’ve had with that [can’t say I’ve boinked any educational staff myself], it’s always been a ‘okay to have a relationship with students not in your class [professor] or if you report it’/’okay to have a relationship with students in your class [TA] if you don’t have an effect on their grades’.
Though in fairness, I think all the circumstances I’m aware of, they had the relationships before the class began, and entered the class with that understanding [sort of like having a family member (eg child) in your class].
Starting the relationship while the student is in your class does seem really questionable.
Though if Penny and her comments are any indication, I doubt the school staff’ll care too much. They might even throw him a party :X
Now I’m hoping the real reason this arc is called “Three’s a Crowd” is because it’s gonna be Sal, Jason, and this other guy for the next three weeks.
“I.. I just want to go HOME.”
“You.. ARE home.”
Nope. Sal, Jason, and Penny — and Penny is the one that will end up unlocking the drama closet.
You mean it’s been locked all this time? What the hell is in there?!?
Well, there’s one question answered: they will not have sex tonight.
It would be kinda sweet if Jason let Sal sleep it off on his couch. Or he might be more chivalrous than I expect and give her the bed while taking the couch himself. He will definitely not be interested in trespassing onto the dorms to help a sloshed underage student find her room. Hey, maybe the two of them will run into certain people on their way back from a sushi restaurant! That would be gloriously awkward.
“Hey, Bowtie, what do you think you are doing with my sister”
“Booooooffin'”
“We are NOT ‘boffin’ or knobbin’ or any other activity without a properly pronounced ending.”
“Heh, I know all’bout your endin'”
“That doesn’t even make sense.”
I wonder if Dorothy knows that “boffin” is also British slang for nerd. “Boffin? Poindexter? What the hell is wrong with people today?”
The way I see it, we’re getting closer to my predicted outcome #1; drunk (Sal alone’s good enough), near/drunk sex, sober up, feel bit sorry, Slipshine material…
I have made my prediction, I wanna see just how close I am. Direct comment link saved for future reference, I recon both #3 then #1 are gonna happen…
Sal has to sober up considerably before Jason will even vaguely consider sexual performings, and I’m not sure he’s desperate enough to wait around until she’s able to give consent.
pretty sure that’s a crime
I did make sure to add sober up in there…
Yeah, but you put it in -after- the sex.
So…
Yeek.
My bad, forgot to leave out the drunk part of the “near/drunk sex”. Him still being sober cancels out the drunk sex part. Near sex, then sober up, feels, so on…
Worked last night, still haven’t had a recharge, head’s not clicking at full speed right now…
Come to think of it, the “near sex” part could be something less sex-like. I guess bonding moment would be a better choice of words. Something to bring them a bit closer outside the classroom & tutoring, Sal sobers up, so on, so forth…
“Jason is what we call an ectomorph.”
OMG, he’s a ghost?! That explains why no one else at the bar can see him!
Newcastle Brown is powerful stuff.
Wey-hey the lads!
Aand Penny’s warning about emotionnal availability.
I can suddenly imagine Sal going “AAAAAAAAHH’M IN A GLASS CAAASE OF EMOTIOOON!”
No harm can come of telling everyone that you are boffing the TA!
You know, knobbing.
Did you mean slap jackin’?
Bonky tonkin’?
Noodling caboodles?
…We’re all making up words now, right?
I knew it! Sal only wants him for his hot bod.
Well it SURE wasn’t for his conversational skills.
Well that answers that.
I don’t know whether to be terrified or tantalized.
And for those of you who don’t think that women can take that girth, we can push out something larger than a beer glass.
And you enjoy that experience so much, too!
Well there is a threshold between pleasantly filling and “Oh. My. Gawd. Get it out getitoutnow.”
Daniel the Human’s brother sent me a short video of some lady on a roadside. Butt naked. Parading & showing everything for all the cars to see. She then goes up to the car that’s taping, takes a Victoria Bitter bottle & gets it surprisingly deep before the car drives off…
You Humans are weird, but that’s why I like you so much…
The only thing better than Jason NOT hitting us over the head with ‘I’M BRITISH!” dialogue is drunk Sal sort-of feeding into sort-of skewering the foible.
I’m starting to feel like Sal isn’t so much cooler than Billie as she is uncool in every way Billie is not and vice versa.
Welp someone has been getting cervical brusing jfc. And…I don’t THINK dicks can be that wide? Can they? I’m not a penis girth expert here. But damn can you imagine trying to blow a dick like that, if she IS being literal?
Last panel’s dialogue makes panel 3 pretty awkward to look at.
Thank god I wasn’t the only one who thought that.
Incest, a game for the whole family…
…Tho they aren’t really family, so does it still count…
Sal is an excellent wingwoman.
Alright, last strip I made some predictions, & it looks like #1 is starting to look more & more likely. Mind you, I can see him doing #3, going to other characters, before it gets…”resolved”…
Clever bloke on the right knows not to interrupt Sal when she’s passionate about something.
I always wondered why English pint glasses have that bump that goes the whole way around the glass.