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bah, flavored lube tastes really bad… it mostly tastes like normal lube (which tastes pretty bad) plus artificial flavors… which isn’t that great either
I’ve been doing poly long enough that I’m sitting here wondering why there was tension, and then I realized “Oh yeah, these folks think Monogamy is the only way”.
Poly is an orientation (a relationship orientation rather than sexual) you either are or you aren’t people don’t get into poly cause it’s easier (which it isn’t it comes with it’s own challenges as I’m sure you know). For some people there is a click where you go “oh this is a thing? That’s what I am!” but many people are just monogamous.
I’m mono and I have a poly boyfriend (who already had a poly gf when we started going out who also has another partner). So despite going out with someone poly and being down with it I am still completely monogamous and I think Danny probably is as well. I would be interested to see if someone brings it up but we should remember Ethan is Amber’s ex so even if poly was ok for everyone this specific combo may not be.
“I am really attracted to you and really enjoy what we have, but I’m also finding myself attracted to the guy you used to date and I’m sorry I feel like I’m fulfilling your worst fears but at the same time lying about it is probably worse?”
Of course, that’s waaaaaaaaaaaay to smart and honest to come naturally from Danny… but I’m fairly sure it’d be the least disastrous way to go.
I don’t think that Danny is dishonest, but he’s not especially… forthcoming? Like, if he thinks a thing is likely to cause embarrassment or a conflict, he will avoid the subject until it becomes impossible not to?
As someone who has the opposite problems, there are a lot of times when my full disclosure too early causes problems, so it’s kind of a Danned if you do, Danned if you don’t situation I guess.
No, no, no, not smooth enough. Danny and Ethan walk in on Amber, and Danny says “Threesome?”
Amber enthusiastically agrees. Dina pokes her head in saying “What?”
Danny’s response: “All right, foursome.”
Becky follows Dina, and Mike shows up because someone’s using his shtick. Bringing your mom and a roll of nickels, of course. Dotty, Walky, and… JOYCE!
It escalates to the point of a sexularity. The comic ends with a full page panel of Daisy, still desperately wanting to get laid.
Your comment has moved me. I now feel like there is no more satisfying a way to depict an orgy than to imply that it is happening and, in place of the orgy, show a lonely, desperate, single person who wants to get laid. My eyes have been opened. The way is clear.
I kinda doubt it. So far as I’m aware, not many guys bother with masturbatory aids beyond lotion, and that’s money that could be spent on cartoons and McNuggets.
Which fits with his sudden desire to find Ethan a boyfriend.
Oh this is gonna be good.
(Here’s to hoping he tells Ethan to “go try talking to that guy”, points at an attractive guy, but Toedad just happens to walk into the path of his pointing at that exact second.) )
haha, oh man, that reminds me of a story I need made into a comic… the punchline is, dude gestures and asks, “Sexy?” as soon as our dumpy friend walks up
Wait a sec, did Ethan and Sal ever actually get a picture or description of toe dad. Its hard to look out for someone when you don’t know what they look like.
Ethan and Danny vs Ross.
Despite having help from Mike they won’t be able to defeat him, eventually though Joyce will return and battle Ross. Ross will eventually kill Becky causing Joyce to turn into a super fundamentalist.
Oh Dannyboy, darling. You’re getting more obvious by the second. I hope for Amber’s sake and your physical health she doesn’t see you pining over someone other than your girlfriend.
I doubt she does. And even if she does know it rationally, that doesn’t mean she understands it emotionally (not sure I’m saying this clearly, but I don’t know how else to phrase it).
I doubt he’s the type to do that. Tear himself up on the inside as he struggles with his identity and his attraction but his very mono-centric ideals that are so central to his unfailing loyalty and faithfulness, on the other hand…?
It was easy to miss, considering it was revealed in a single page, and then never mentioned again. AFAIK, Ethan is the only character who knows, and he never mentioned it to Joyce or anyone else.
And the reveal wasn’t a direct statement, but an implication, so easy to misunderstand, and she didn’t reveal it until just after she left, so literally every interaction she’s ever had with anyone in the comic has been under the assumption that she’s a dude.
But there were like seventeen million comments discussing it at the time.
My bad, didn’t mean to throw any shade (I wonder how many other people will know what that means…) I tend to forget things that could be considered crucial. Apparently, this fact is one of them.
Damned straight, and that’s why I don’t wear the damned things. Well, that, and since I never wear them, I don’t have any practise wearing them… Also since I didn’t grow up in them my feet don’t fit in them since I have mostly Celtic toes from my Mum so they aren’t as pointy as mainland Europeans, so they don’t fit well, so I don’t wear them, so I can’t walk in them…
FWIW, my long-term prediction is that Joyce will end up having a falling-out with her parents over Becky (and, possibly, supporting Jocelyne) and Jocelyne will end up her ‘parental-ish support person’ for a while.
As overwhelmingly adorable as these two are, I think today is the day we get a reprieve from the entire comments section begging for a slipshine immediately.
Because “Disagree” would be just a bit dark for Willis, I think.
to a bunch of queer men and awkwardly flirt with them as he stumbles around with trying to set them up with Ethan. I see at least one instance of someone reacting favorably to Danny’s attempts but assume Danny is just hitting on him and Danny freaking out about it.
Danny! No! This “unchain my heart” bullshit is bullshit. It is definitely not some other person’s fault that you find them attractive and don’t want to control yourself.
Yeah, it’s interesting that a lot of Danny’s problem comes from his belief in a very specific type of narrative regarding relationships, one that has unfortunately been hammered home time and time again (we can safely presume) for him by his “we were high school sweethearts and you need a relationship to complete you” parents.
He hero-worships his romantic partners and potential partners, holds to ideas about “relationships” to the detriment of what the people inside of them need (his insistence of clinging to a narrative about what a relationship is supposed to develop into blew up his relationship with Dorothy to both of their detriments), and so on.
Honestly, as much as I’d love poly representation and think that DEA could be a cute little V, I think Danny and his ideas of relationships are why it won’t happen. Amber has been shown to be very amenable to the idea of 3somes and watching men kiss and be intimate and Ethan would probably thrive in a relationship where he doesn’t feel primarily or entirely responsible for fulfilling a partner role and where there is less pressure on him overall.
But Danny has a whole vision of a one true love that you spend all your days with and subsume yourself completely and unwaveringly faithfully to and all of this baggage and as such would probably have the most trouble switching to that paradigm, which is why he’s happy defining and maintaining Amber’s hard limits between her diverging personalities.
It’ll be interesting to see if he’ll be able to learn to shed himself of this training and these narratives as he matures as that was not really an arc he got to complete in the other universe.
I don’t think Ethan or Danny would be likely to suggest a polyam relationship, so it would probably have to be Amber after she finds out. If Amber were to be the one suggesting it I think that Danny might actually agree to it.
Yeah, he’s unlikely to act on it, but having this be in existence is definitely scrambling him up both on a “aieee, having attractions in the first place is a form of disloyalty” level and a “what even is bi and what does this mean” level.
It’s pretty clear that he knows his tools for processing his attractions to women according to his internal compass (which isn’t always great), but that the attraction to guys is a variable he just doesn’t know how to handle yet. He’s too Danny to act on it, but it’s just so new and different and rife with personal identity discovery for him to put it in the same background radiation box as his attractions to women who aren’t his girlfriend.
Danny, if the fact you have a girlfriend and are thus ‘unavailable’ yourself doesn’t stop you from having fantasies will Ethan getting a long-term boyfriend really help stop them?
I guess you could argue that it might be an extra road block to /Ethan/ actually /acting/ on such things though as I think may happen in your fantasies. Even if it’s far from a fool proof plan.
For one thing, anyone you set him up with could suck (thus it doesn’t last anyway) OR you get Ethan talking to you about it as you fantasise about saying Ethan deserves so much better and you kissing/taking him away from this terrible relationship blahblahblah what a cliche Danny, Christ OR if they’re actually really great you could slowly descend into thinking about them too, along with Ethan, thus double the trouble.
‘Course, it could work out fine but somehow I doubt that.
Also there’s the fact Ethan might feel he’s not ready to get a boyfriend yet anyway, as I probably get from this strip, rendering this all moot, and it would suck to force that on him before he’s comfortable with it.
Bad times ahead for Amber and Danny, IMHO. Danny looks like he’s decided that he wants his cake and eat it (to use the incomprehensible saying). He seems to think he can lead two parallel lives without either affecting the other.
What am I saying? Well, IMO at least, the ‘get you a boyfriend’ means ‘have a relationship with me’. and the previous panels meaning ‘I have no intention to tell my girlfriend that I’m bisexual’. Nothing good can come of such a mindset.
It seems more like Danny wants Ethan to find a boyfriend so he becomes unavailable and thus is no longer a temptation to Danny. At least that’s what his rationale seems to be.
This. Danny probably also knows that he pines less over women when they are taken and so hopes this will be the case with his dude crush as well.
Though, with regards to Ben’s statements, the fact that he’s not feeling confident enough to talk to Amber about all of this is going to bite him in the ass. Maybe not in jealousy, but just because not talking about things with a close romantic partner leads to a lot of contention and stress within the relationship.
Well, even with Dorothy (and at the Questioning with Ethan) he was hesitant to talk about it with Amber. I guess it’s that he thinks saying it will change things? It was kind of like that when I started coming out.
I definitely do believe that a lot of this is stemming from Danny trying to put as many walls in front of his attraction for Ethan as possible, though.
Now then, Danny, remember that you’re dating Amazi-Girl, not Amber. What you do when Amber is just some girl in your computer science class and Amazi-Girl doesn’t exist is entirely up to you.
Or, at least, suggesting that might make Amber realise how much she’s messing things up.
Of course, this is far too much rationalisation for Danny to consider.
I don’t know, that doesn’t seem to be a path of thought process that’s very Danny. To Danny, Amazi-Girl always exists somewhere (and she does in a way in the back of Amber’s diverging DID brain) and so cheating on her when she’s not “around” in that sense would be the same as cheating on a partner when they are out of town.
Ah, matchmaking. That thing that people do to make their friends miserable (under the guise of making them happy, of course) to cover up the fact that they themselves are insecure, miserable, and alone.
Eh, I dunno. If you accept the premise of arranged marriage (which may be what you think is fucked up), this kind of matchmaker actually makes sense. Western matchmakers are mostly just nosy, gossipy and invasive.
Part of it definitely was that Danny was super uncomfortable realizing he had feelings for Amber while still dating someone else (yes, I know), but Amber pushing him kind of made it all bubble to a point where he couldn’t ignore it anymore.
Ethan, meanwhile, is just passively there. He’s not causing anything like Amber was on the bridge. It’s harder for Danny to push the Abort button when nothing’s actually happening.
Danny Ethan is going to ask why you want him to have a boyfriend. Danny Ethan is going to figure this out pretty quick you’re bad at this.
Well I mean he might not. But if he’s at all paying attention he will. (I mean come on. If someone came up to me and said ‘Hey btdubs you need to be less available okay? Let’s find you a datemate’ I’d be pretty damn suspicious.
Never been in this situation myself, but is what’s going on here something other bi people have gone through around the time they started coming to terms with it?
I figured by now Danny would have come to terms with his attraction, but I guess there’s a distinction between having an attraction to guys in general, and Ethan specifically.
I do think that Danny’s attraction to Ethan is more difficult to deal with because of his sexuality. He’s used to being able sort of decide not to be attracted to women if he’s interested in someone else (see his encounter with Billie where he turned her down because he was into Amazi-Girl), but with Ethan he’s insisting on trying to get him a new boyfriend.
It wasn’t for me! My problem was that I’m about a 4-5 on the Kinsey Scale and my parents are homophobic. I realized I would much rather have titties in my face than a dick when I was 15. I’m now 35 and have been married 13 years this December, and would still rather have the titties, and my parents are still homophobic, plus my husband’s dad is homophobic. ^^;
For me, coming to terms with being bi was more about dealing with people being dickbags than about sticking with one partner.
Ha. It was kind of like that for me too, though I’m not entirely certain on my Kinsey placement. I guess I find it easier to be attracted to women?
I think that’s mostly because I’ve been used to it all my life, so when it comes to guys I kind of play it by ear.
Coming to terms with it was like that for me too. Most of my fears were about how people were going to treat me if I told them. It’s for that reason that I’ve still been pretty hush about it IRL.
Sure, but in the last arc at the Questioning meeting I got the impression that Danny had sort of accepted he was bi and that he was attracted to Ethan, though on reflection “I still like girls, I just think there’s something more” isn’t exactly the same as an outright confirmation.
I think at this point Danny does understand that he’s not straight, but actually dealing with being attracted to someone other than Amber is difficult for him.
Optimus Prime broke down and cried on the set of "Transformers" (2007) due to the extensive use of green screen filming. He reportedly said, "This is not why I became an actor."
“I’m just going to say it, shame on any of us who throws a trans child under the bus for thinking they’re going to get elected. That child deserves our support. Don’t worry about the pollsters calling it distractions, because we need to be the party of human dignity.”
Minnesota Star Tribune@startribune.com ⋅ 2d
Gov. Tim Walz is doubling down on trans rights — and criticizing members of his party who are retreating — at a time when the issue has become a political lightning rod nationally and back home in Minnesota.
they managed to get the arms and thighs to be different grays, which I wasn't sure they'd be able to do, the way the mold's set up
though maybe they're just producing a lot of extra thighs and/or arms in the wrong colors and throwing those away, i dunno
Minnesota Star Tribune @startribune.com ⋅ 2d
preternia @preternia.com ⋅ 2d
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⚧️Coming Out
Hailey Piper 
“Alternately, you need, like, a DRASTIC makeover.”
“But I think I look pretty good?”
“I DO TOOno wait”
Danny gettin’ all territorial up in here
Or anti-territorial, maybe.
“NO I DO NOT WANT TO MAKE YOU MINE STOP BEING CUTE”
tsundere desu
ethan needs to go back to that arc 1 watermelon haircut
even better…?
better.
You might as well give up and go poly right now.
Please.
Pretty please with condom safe flavored lube on top.
bah, flavored lube tastes really bad… it mostly tastes like normal lube (which tastes pretty bad) plus artificial flavors… which isn’t that great either
eh, some people are into artificial strawberry gums.
(I hate those. urgh)
I was just coming in here to post the same.
I’ve been doing poly long enough that I’m sitting here wondering why there was tension, and then I realized “Oh yeah, these folks think Monogamy is the only way”.
Poly is an orientation (a relationship orientation rather than sexual) you either are or you aren’t people don’t get into poly cause it’s easier (which it isn’t it comes with it’s own challenges as I’m sure you know). For some people there is a click where you go “oh this is a thing? That’s what I am!” but many people are just monogamous.
I’m mono and I have a poly boyfriend (who already had a poly gf when we started going out who also has another partner). So despite going out with someone poly and being down with it I am still completely monogamous and I think Danny probably is as well. I would be interested to see if someone brings it up but we should remember Ethan is Amber’s ex so even if poly was ok for everyone this specific combo may not be.
Listen to Danny, Ethan. If you’re left single any longer, he’s gonna jump you any second now.
If he’s left single any longer, he’ll turn into a singaylarity ?
(so would Daisy, I guess)
Sin-gay-lay-ity?
So that’s how you pronounce it.
You’re getting less subtle here, Dan.
He’s about to dan it up, in spite of everything.
In his attempts to do right by Amber, no less. This is an impressive level of Danning.
“I would like to have a threesome with you and the boy who you dated but turned out to be gay, who I am also attracted to.”
genius
“I am really attracted to you and really enjoy what we have, but I’m also finding myself attracted to the guy you used to date and I’m sorry I feel like I’m fulfilling your worst fears but at the same time lying about it is probably worse?”
Of course, that’s waaaaaaaaaaaay to smart and honest to come naturally from Danny… but I’m fairly sure it’d be the least disastrous way to go.
Really, for all his faults, Danny is actually a very honest person. Still way too smart, but maybe he’ll stumble across it?
I don’t think that Danny is dishonest, but he’s not especially… forthcoming? Like, if he thinks a thing is likely to cause embarrassment or a conflict, he will avoid the subject until it becomes impossible not to?
As someone who has the opposite problems, there are a lot of times when my full disclosure too early causes problems, so it’s kind of a Danned if you do, Danned if you don’t situation I guess.
I feel ya’. I really, really do.
That was truly well-written and insightful, and I thank you for having posted it.
He’s honest to a segfault, if I dare say.
No, no, no, not smooth enough. Danny and Ethan walk in on Amber, and Danny says “Threesome?”
Amber enthusiastically agrees. Dina pokes her head in saying “What?”
Danny’s response: “All right, foursome.”
Becky follows Dina, and Mike shows up because someone’s using his shtick. Bringing your mom and a roll of nickels, of course. Dotty, Walky, and… JOYCE!
It escalates to the point of a sexularity. The comic ends with a full page panel of Daisy, still desperately wanting to get laid.
Your comment has moved me. I now feel like there is no more satisfying a way to depict an orgy than to imply that it is happening and, in place of the orgy, show a lonely, desperate, single person who wants to get laid. My eyes have been opened. The way is clear.
*I See The Light from Tangled begins to play*
You basically just described the base plot of Ma3, lol.
hahaha
Far too true. Comment made me actually laugh, not LOL
Mary: What’s going on here?
Ethan: We’re the aristocrats!
At this point, he’s reached fractal Danning: no matter how closely you examine it, all you find is another level of Danning.
the mask comes off!!! ruuuun!
What’s next,the moon crashing on our surface?
Shit, did anyone get the Giants?
Anyone have an ocarina? I misplaced mine.
I found it, but some brat with a freaky mask ran off with it after kicking me in the shin and stealing my left shoe.
I can’t even find my talking hat that’s actually a cursed Minish dude.
Someone calls the Gurren team.
I wear no mask.
Just wait till you crush on Ethan’s boyfriend as well Danny…
Therefore, it’s gotta be Jacob, eh? Eh??
(sorry Jacob, it’s gotta be you)
((not sorry))
Thanks for that mental image. Now if you’ll excuse me, it’s time I called my old friend, Other Jacob…
Apropos of nothing, I am wondering if Walky has an Other Dorothy.
I kinda doubt it. So far as I’m aware, not many guys bother with masturbatory aids beyond lotion, and that’s money that could be spent on cartoons and McNuggets.
That’s a surprisingly well-thought-out response considering the subject.
Well, Disloyal Subject is a clever clogs in that respect.
Well, maybe he doesn’t have an Other Dorothy, but seeing how things are going he could consider investing in an Other Ethan.
Danny, you should honestly know this by now, but if you want anything to go well, you have to make sure that you are in no way involved.
Quick, AmaziGirl and Boy Blunder, to the gay mixer!
Thank you. Just thank you. You’ve made my night.
You’re welcome.
Danny strikes me as the kind of person who loses all sexual attraction to someone the second he finds out they’re unavailable.
He is the god of faithfulness.
Which fits with his sudden desire to find Ethan a boyfriend.
Oh this is gonna be good.
(Here’s to hoping he tells Ethan to “go try talking to that guy”, points at an attractive guy, but Toedad just happens to walk into the path of his pointing at that exact second.) )
haha, oh man, that reminds me of a story I need made into a comic… the punchline is, dude gestures and asks, “Sexy?” as soon as our dumpy friend walks up
Wait a sec, did Ethan and Sal ever actually get a picture or description of toe dad. Its hard to look out for someone when you don’t know what they look like.
Sal knows about his shuttlecock-like appearance, but Ethan may well be in the dark on this one.
Ethan: Well I didn’t meet your father, but this nice mustached man in camo pants wants to talk to you!
I’m just picturing Ross attempting to save Danny and Ethan’s souls as the perfect distraction.
Ethan and Danny vs Ross.
Despite having help from Mike they won’t be able to defeat him, eventually though Joyce will return and battle Ross. Ross will eventually kill Becky causing Joyce to turn into a super fundamentalist.
If Joyce doesn’t have one on her phone, their church/homeschooling org would have him somewhere on their website…
So let’s leave it alone/If we can’t see eye to eye…
There ain’t no good guy/There ain’t no bad guy
There is only you and me
And We Just Disagree
Oh Dannyboy, darling. You’re getting more obvious by the second. I hope for Amber’s sake and your physical health she doesn’t see you pining over someone other than your girlfriend.
Well we know that Danny would never touch Ethan while still dating Amber. The problem is if Amber knows this.
I doubt she does. And even if she does know it rationally, that doesn’t mean she understands it emotionally (not sure I’m saying this clearly, but I don’t know how else to phrase it).
That’s a pretty good way to phrase it. The thing about feelings is that they’re not always logical.
I think that it’s a very nice way to phrase it.
It’s clear.
Amber knows Danny is annoyingly faithful.
Or worse, planning to have a parallel relationship with her and Ethan so that he doesn’t have to confront choosing one over the other.
I doubt he’s the type to do that. Tear himself up on the inside as he struggles with his identity and his attraction but his very mono-centric ideals that are so central to his unfailing loyalty and faithfulness, on the other hand…?
Yeah, this is going to be interesting.
Ethan, how dare you be so *there* and so *existant* in this world, that’s really not fair. Your being-ness is distracting poor Danny!
“By persistently remaining single, a man converts himself into a permanent public temptation.”
Nice one
*claps*
Will Joyce’s sister get involved again?
Wait, Joyce has a sister? Seriously, I know I’m new to the Walkyverse and stuff, but I feel like that’s something I’d remember reading.
Jocelyne. You might know her as Joshua.
Woah… that happens? I really need to readthe other Walkyverse works, I missed a lot.
What? No, in Dumbing pf Age. It’s from the last storyline of Book 3.
…. Beginning to wonder how long its been since I read that chapter, because I feel like thats somethint I’d definitely remember happening.
She’s still closeted and passing as male.
I believe the only one of in-comic cast she’s out to is Ethan.
Her name is Jocelyne.
Jocelyne? I know our society is blind to the plight of our transgender brethren (sic), but this is ridiculous.
It was easy to miss, considering it was revealed in a single page, and then never mentioned again. AFAIK, Ethan is the only character who knows, and he never mentioned it to Joyce or anyone else.
And the reveal wasn’t a direct statement, but an implication, so easy to misunderstand, and she didn’t reveal it until just after she left, so literally every interaction she’s ever had with anyone in the comic has been under the assumption that she’s a dude.
But there were like seventeen million comments discussing it at the time.
My bad, didn’t mean to throw any shade (I wonder how many other people will know what that means…) I tend to forget things that could be considered crucial. Apparently, this fact is one of them.
That’s not what that means.
Wait for real? Because if so, then there’s a good chance i’ve been using that wrong for a while. Man, I have been off my game lately.
Oh, please let her get involved, but in heels this time. Because heels are so pretty on tall girls.
It’s all fun and game until someone breaks a knee.
Some women have instincts for managing heels. Others do not. Those who do not should refrain from wearing them for their own safety.
Damned straight, and that’s why I don’t wear the damned things. Well, that, and since I never wear them, I don’t have any practise wearing them… Also since I didn’t grow up in them my feet don’t fit in them since I have mostly Celtic toes from my Mum so they aren’t as pointy as mainland Europeans, so they don’t fit well, so I don’t wear them, so I can’t walk in them…
It’s a convoluted and vicious cycle.
Oops, more like women.
FWIW, my long-term prediction is that Joyce will end up having a falling-out with her parents over Becky (and, possibly, supporting Jocelyne) and Jocelyne will end up her ‘parental-ish support person’ for a while.
That sounds nice, tho writer isn’t exactly a well paid job.
As overwhelmingly adorable as these two are, I think today is the day we get a reprieve from the entire comments section begging for a slipshine immediately.
Because “Disagree” would be just a bit dark for Willis, I think.
Pffff. You’ll never get anything with that attitude. Now is the time to double down.
I’m just saying, that last panel doesn’t bode well for immediate sexing.
untz untz
What are you talking about? Angst is a whole genre of sexing.
It would be nice.
I feel like this boyfriend search is going to lead to Ethan finding out about Danny’s crush on him.
I’ve been waiting for this since the shower scene.
It might.
It will definitely lead to a lot of awkwardness as Danny tries to sidle up with his idea of subtle:
http://www.dumbingofage.com/2011/comic/book-1/05-media-rumble/butt/
to a bunch of queer men and awkwardly flirt with them as he stumbles around with trying to set them up with Ethan. I see at least one instance of someone reacting favorably to Danny’s attempts but assume Danny is just hitting on him and Danny freaking out about it.
Aah, reading that bit again, Danny actually changed some bits. More than we give him credit for
Danny! No! This “unchain my heart” bullshit is bullshit. It is definitely not some other person’s fault that you find them attractive and don’t want to control yourself.
This is an act that is part of the behavioral pattern known as “danning it up”
If it continues, we will adapt our catchphrase to “Dann you, Willis!”
*snort*
Wow I almost spit out my coffee there.
That’s a Dann good phrase.
Yeah, it’s interesting that a lot of Danny’s problem comes from his belief in a very specific type of narrative regarding relationships, one that has unfortunately been hammered home time and time again (we can safely presume) for him by his “we were high school sweethearts and you need a relationship to complete you” parents.
He hero-worships his romantic partners and potential partners, holds to ideas about “relationships” to the detriment of what the people inside of them need (his insistence of clinging to a narrative about what a relationship is supposed to develop into blew up his relationship with Dorothy to both of their detriments), and so on.
Honestly, as much as I’d love poly representation and think that DEA could be a cute little V, I think Danny and his ideas of relationships are why it won’t happen. Amber has been shown to be very amenable to the idea of 3somes and watching men kiss and be intimate and Ethan would probably thrive in a relationship where he doesn’t feel primarily or entirely responsible for fulfilling a partner role and where there is less pressure on him overall.
But Danny has a whole vision of a one true love that you spend all your days with and subsume yourself completely and unwaveringly faithfully to and all of this baggage and as such would probably have the most trouble switching to that paradigm, which is why he’s happy defining and maintaining Amber’s hard limits between her diverging personalities.
It’ll be interesting to see if he’ll be able to learn to shed himself of this training and these narratives as he matures as that was not really an arc he got to complete in the other universe.
I don’t think Ethan or Danny would be likely to suggest a polyam relationship, so it would probably have to be Amber after she finds out. If Amber were to be the one suggesting it I think that Danny might actually agree to it.
Well said.
You won’t like Danny when he disagrees.
A lot of people don’t seem to like him regardless.
Danny wants to hop on it so bad.
Danny wants it to stop being so hoppable XD
Basically, yeah. Danny is still in denial and seems to be determined to just avoid dealing with it at all.
To steal someone else’s gimmick:
*wicked game plays on the muzak*
to be fair danny isnt exactly the only one here that disagrees with the idea of ethan staying single
though i think most of the fans PROOOOOOOOBABLY have different reasons.
aw man, you should’ve named this strip after the last panel
He did the hovertext though
he had a golden opportunity for a hat trick, angrier version of myself
“Stupid sexy Ethan!”
“Nothing at all!
Nothing at all!
Nothing at all!”
Oh good, at least Danny knows what his own feelings are.
Your grav makes this sound menacingly sarcastic.
Because only one of you being unavailable isn’t deterrent enough, I guess.
Eh, it’s probably deterrent enough, but it means there’s a temptation there that Danny would probably rather not have to fend off all the time.
Yeah, he’s unlikely to act on it, but having this be in existence is definitely scrambling him up both on a “aieee, having attractions in the first place is a form of disloyalty” level and a “what even is bi and what does this mean” level.
It’s pretty clear that he knows his tools for processing his attractions to women according to his internal compass (which isn’t always great), but that the attraction to guys is a variable he just doesn’t know how to handle yet. He’s too Danny to act on it, but it’s just so new and different and rife with personal identity discovery for him to put it in the same background radiation box as his attractions to women who aren’t his girlfriend.
Myeahhh.
‘Cause pawning him off on some other guy will TOTALLY get rid of all that yearning and tension.
That happens.
Danny is a born player 2. He’ll be good just watching.
Ooh, kinky!
Danny, noooooo.
Danny is… asserting himself?
*Starts klaxon, puts on hard hat, runs around in circles*
Next: Danny, Joyce and Amber team up in “the Ethan shipping league.”
“Amber, I’m breaking up with you to bone your gay ex-boyfriend.”
Did you mean “I’m breaking up with your alter ego”?
“Amazi-Girl, I’m sorry but I’m breaking up with you.”
“But why?!”
“The entire dynamic of our relationship was just too much for me, and I need more. Besides, there’s… someone else…”
“What? How?! Who!?!”
“Okay, so think Nightwing in civilian clothes and also a homosexual, and then make him a bit taller.”
“…holy shit, that’s hot.”
Danny, if the fact you have a girlfriend and are thus ‘unavailable’ yourself doesn’t stop you from having fantasies will Ethan getting a long-term boyfriend really help stop them?
I guess you could argue that it might be an extra road block to /Ethan/ actually /acting/ on such things though as I think may happen in your fantasies. Even if it’s far from a fool proof plan.
For one thing, anyone you set him up with could suck (thus it doesn’t last anyway) OR you get Ethan talking to you about it as you fantasise about saying Ethan deserves so much better and you kissing/taking him away from this terrible relationship blahblahblah what a cliche Danny, Christ OR if they’re actually really great you could slowly descend into thinking about them too, along with Ethan, thus double the trouble.
‘Course, it could work out fine but somehow I doubt that.
Also there’s the fact Ethan might feel he’s not ready to get a boyfriend yet anyway, as I probably get from this strip, rendering this all moot, and it would suck to force that on him before he’s comfortable with it.
Bad times ahead for Amber and Danny, IMHO. Danny looks like he’s decided that he wants his cake and eat it (to use the incomprehensible saying). He seems to think he can lead two parallel lives without either affecting the other.
What am I saying? Well, IMO at least, the ‘get you a boyfriend’ means ‘have a relationship with me’. and the previous panels meaning ‘I have no intention to tell my girlfriend that I’m bisexual’. Nothing good can come of such a mindset.
It seems more like Danny wants Ethan to find a boyfriend so he becomes unavailable and thus is no longer a temptation to Danny. At least that’s what his rationale seems to be.
This. Danny probably also knows that he pines less over women when they are taken and so hopes this will be the case with his dude crush as well.
Though, with regards to Ben’s statements, the fact that he’s not feeling confident enough to talk to Amber about all of this is going to bite him in the ass. Maybe not in jealousy, but just because not talking about things with a close romantic partner leads to a lot of contention and stress within the relationship.
Well, even with Dorothy (and at the Questioning with Ethan) he was hesitant to talk about it with Amber. I guess it’s that he thinks saying it will change things? It was kind of like that when I started coming out.
I definitely do believe that a lot of this is stemming from Danny trying to put as many walls in front of his attraction for Ethan as possible, though.
How did you even come to that conclusion?
And yesterday Danny had a scary face. And today he has a mad face.
Wonder if all this emotion is going to unDanny him.
Ethan can’t possibly be missing these ‘hints’ – they’re about as subtle as bricks.
Bricks can be subtle…
Anything can be brick subtle.
dang it italics
BRICK
Now then, Danny, remember that you’re dating Amazi-Girl, not Amber. What you do when Amber is just some girl in your computer science class and Amazi-Girl doesn’t exist is entirely up to you.
Or, at least, suggesting that might make Amber realise how much she’s messing things up.
Of course, this is far too much rationalisation for Danny to consider.
I don’t know, that doesn’t seem to be a path of thought process that’s very Danny. To Danny, Amazi-Girl always exists somewhere (and she does in a way in the back of Amber’s diverging DID brain) and so cheating on her when she’s not “around” in that sense would be the same as cheating on a partner when they are out of town.
Danny doesn’t see Amber compartmentalizing her identities.
But I mean, even if Danny was solely convinced he was dating Amazi-Girl and Amber was some girl, he still wouldn’t do anything with anyone else.
I VOLUNTEER
Where this is going. I like it.
Ah, matchmaking. That thing that people do to make their friends miserable (under the guise of making them happy, of course) to cover up the fact that they themselves are insecure, miserable, and alone.
I learned a different definition of “matchmaking” growing up.
…It’s even more fucked up.
Eh, I dunno. If you accept the premise of arranged marriage (which may be what you think is fucked up), this kind of matchmaker actually makes sense. Western matchmakers are mostly just nosy, gossipy and invasive.
They get some memorable music numbers, though.
Sometimes it’s just payback for annoying the wrong people.
Danny really doesn’t know how to handle attraction to multiple people doesn’t he?
At least this attraction is relatively new, young, and still in the meet-cute flirty stage as Danny seems to be at his most Dannying it up when he really takes a good honest look at how deep his attractions go and lets himself fully acknowledge to himself the full shape of it:
http://www.dumbingofage.com/2013/comic/book-3/04-just-hangin-out-with-my-family/dynamic/
http://www.dumbingofage.com/2013/comic/book-3/04-just-hangin-out-with-my-family/hands-2/
And his choices under that state in order to live by his own personal code with regards to what he personally deems to be faithfulness are… “not the greatest” to say the least:
http://www.dumbingofage.com/2013/comic/book-3/04-just-hangin-out-with-my-family/wander-2/
http://www.dumbingofage.com/2013/comic/book-3/04-just-hangin-out-with-my-family/didnt/
Which makes me think that there’s probably some epic level Dannying it up ahead that probably has a greater chance of hurting Ethan than Amber.
Nah, Amber was pushing herself onto him, Ethan is not.
What timemonkey said.
Part of it definitely was that Danny was super uncomfortable realizing he had feelings for Amber while still dating someone else (yes, I know), but Amber pushing him kind of made it all bubble to a point where he couldn’t ignore it anymore.
Ethan, meanwhile, is just passively there. He’s not causing anything like Amber was on the bridge. It’s harder for Danny to push the Abort button when nothing’s actually happening.
Danny Ethan is going to ask why you want him to have a boyfriend. Danny Ethan is going to figure this out pretty quick you’re bad at this.
Well I mean he might not. But if he’s at all paying attention he will. (I mean come on. If someone came up to me and said ‘Hey btdubs you need to be less available okay? Let’s find you a datemate’ I’d be pretty damn suspicious.
) sorry. Didn’t close that parentheses. That’s gonna bother me.
Never been in this situation myself, but is what’s going on here something other bi people have gone through around the time they started coming to terms with it?
I figured by now Danny would have come to terms with his attraction, but I guess there’s a distinction between having an attraction to guys in general, and Ethan specifically.
The situation really doesn’t have much to do with him being bi. That’s just a complication.
I do think that Danny’s attraction to Ethan is more difficult to deal with because of his sexuality. He’s used to being able sort of decide not to be attracted to women if he’s interested in someone else (see his encounter with Billie where he turned her down because he was into Amazi-Girl), but with Ethan he’s insisting on trying to get him a new boyfriend.
I think he’s more interested in Ethan than Amber, and THAT is what’s causing the issue.
It wasn’t for me! My problem was that I’m about a 4-5 on the Kinsey Scale and my parents are homophobic. I realized I would much rather have titties in my face than a dick when I was 15. I’m now 35 and have been married 13 years this December, and would still rather have the titties, and my parents are still homophobic, plus my husband’s dad is homophobic. ^^;
For me, coming to terms with being bi was more about dealing with people being dickbags than about sticking with one partner.
Ha. It was kind of like that for me too, though I’m not entirely certain on my Kinsey placement. I guess I find it easier to be attracted to women?
I think that’s mostly because I’ve been used to it all my life, so when it comes to guys I kind of play it by ear.
Coming to terms with it was like that for me too. Most of my fears were about how people were going to treat me if I told them. It’s for that reason that I’ve still been pretty hush about it IRL.
Only about five days have passed in comic time since Danny experienced the first hint he was into dudes.
Sure, but in the last arc at the Questioning meeting I got the impression that Danny had sort of accepted he was bi and that he was attracted to Ethan, though on reflection “I still like girls, I just think there’s something more” isn’t exactly the same as an outright confirmation.
I think at this point Danny does understand that he’s not straight, but actually dealing with being attracted to someone other than Amber is difficult for him.
MAKE UP ALREADY!
You spelt “out” wrong.
Yeah, those two really should out up already.
I can’t wait to see them make up out. Make up outings are simply divine.
Danny’s best feature is availability, he doesn’t want Ethan horning in on his territory!
That last panel is my life.