Desperate for companionship, Frankenstein's Monster pretends to be the Opera Ghost. A grave mistake.
Slightly Damned
Chu
Rhea Snaketail returns from the dead, befriending a Demon who falls in love with an Angel. The afterlife ain't what it used to be!
2 Slices
RJ Morel
After a case of mistaken identity, will awkward Daisuke find help from excitable Mamo, or will his love life be thrown completely off track?
Countdown to Countdown
Velinxi
Iris Black is a self-proclaimed inventor with the curious ability to bring his drawings to life, and yearns to find a space where he can use his powers freely.
Paint the Town Red
Windy, Winter Jay Kiakas
Winona runs a werewolf shelter with partner in crime, Odile in the Gothic city of Merlot. One day they take in an injured vampire, and soon unravels many of the dark secrets of Merlot.
Dumbing of Age
David M Willis
Joyce has been homeschooled her entire life until now, when she's suddenly a freshman in college! Things don't go well.
The Otherknown
Lorian Merriman
Chandra is a 12-year-old accidental time traveler with a reluctant new dad, who happens to be a member of a feared galactic crime syndicate.
Mac Hall
Matt Boyd
The legendary early-aughts webcomic that inspired a wave of webcomic creators.
Guilded Age
T Campbell, John Waltrip, Florence Machina
Welcome to the saga of the working-class adventurer! Enjoy the complete story with new annotations daily!
Blindsprings
Kadi Fedoruk
Tamaura, wrested into a world 300 years in the future, must find a way to save the magic fading from her country.
Cyanide & Happiness
Explosm
Satire, dark humor and surreal humor.
Namesake
Isa, Meg
There's ghosts at your heels and fairy tale worlds ahead. What do you do? Jump down the rabbit hole!
Beeserker
TJ Cordes
This comic is about a robot powered by bees, but it's also about the kind of people who think filling a robot with bees is a good idea, and why they're wrong.
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Ruth: Alright, I’ve got everything I need to rip out their femurs and beat them to death…but my room is the first place they’d look for a body and if that ain’t damning evidence I don’t know what is.
But aren’t both swords metaphors for toxic religion? The whole series always seemed to be: ‘kill a bunch of people to claim your rightful power and get what you want.’ Especially with Soul Calibur V having the whole: “Hey, I’m the good sword, now help me kill your sister because she is totally evil! Also, I’m totally your mother and not just using her to get to you!”
Don’t underestimate the universe and the amount of hate, misery, and pompous arrogance it can sustain, after all the US presidential is hasn’t killed it/us yet.
You all act like Mary is sooo hard to be around. “perfect glory’s gentle reminder” Turns out it’s actually real easy. You just have to delude yourself as much as she does.
Noise-cancelling headphones and a lot of nights spent on friends’ futons can go a long way. I’d also look into changing rooms, because if she’s mad over skating in the halls in the middle of the day, you probably can’t breathe in her room without her shouting over a noise disturbance.
I had a friend who had a roommate like Mary. She fixed the problem handily by proceeding to fuck the living daylights out of her boyfriend every time she was in the room.
Mary can’t be that sensitive to noise; after all, she knows about Roz’s vibrating toys, which kind of implies that Roz has used them enough for Mary to notice… unless there was a comic I missed that had Roz trying each of her toys in turn, trying to find the quietest one while Mary complained about the racket.
Mary didn’t hear the phone buzz, so she could easily be assuming Roz has vibrators and trying to shame her over it, because ‘obviously’ the “hellbound slut” would own such ‘devilish’ contraptions.
I could get along with Mary fine, I’m pretty good at connecting with pretty much anyone who isn’t currently trying to stab me. Plus you have to do something really fucking awful to really piss me off, Ryan and Blaine both pass that limit, as does Toe Dad.
I don’t get riled up easily either, but Mary’s lack of good things to say + her unerring close-mindedness + her justification of her words with her religion = she’d be dead within a month.
I’m surprised someone who preaches to others so much also takes the lords name in vain so openly and opportunistically.
Also, could we get an entire story that’s just mary and roz,(something like walking with dina)I’m really interested in seeing how these two live together and make things work given they’ve shared a room for – five weeks now?
I haven’t been Christian for a long time, but I’m pretty sure that mentioning His name when talking about His will doesn’t count as taking His name in vain. The “in vain” part implies a lack of purpose.
Now I’ve got Shirley Bassey in my head singing “Hash tags are
for ever” over and over …
I tried watching one of the Craig Bond films. I like Craig, he’s a good actor – Layer Cake, Sword of Honour etc. I lasted 5 minutes of preposterous “action” before switching off.
Even Ian Fleming found Bond boring after two books. Like most British heroes, he’s a shallow thug with charm.
Seeing her where the “More him Less me” shirt, I thought it might be a sign she’s lost some pride, finally realizing she’s not god’s greatest creation everyone should revere and aspire to be. And then she opened her mouth.
I am fully confident that she can learn various techniques to be even more annoyingly noisome-Christian. No, I don’t by into the notion that there is a maximum rank for that skill.
…… is that MORE or LESS horrific than threatening them with literally eternal literal torture that is literally beyond any pain that can be experienced by a living person?
Um, let’s go with the idea that the people in heaven get to look down and see the people in hell being tortured, but maybe they were hoping to see just that, and spent a lot of their lives saying so.
I’m not threatening you with eternal torture, I’m warning you that it’s going to happen if you don’t change your ways.
Of course if you do change your ways and accept Jesus Christ as your personal savior, confess all your sins, and eat this cracker, you don’t get to hang out with all the other cool people getting tortured in hell.
Eh, what’s she DONE really? Aside from make a sex tape with Joe (which he consented to) and chewing out Joyce that one time? (Which, considering the last time they’d met, Joyce was slut shaming her over the sex tape, i’d say was warranted, but that’s me)
She released the sex tape without Joe’s consent, though.
And Joyce had just made improvements in her worldview, which Roz took as a chance to slam on her. Now, Joyce needs to be taken to task on occasion, but that was the worst time to do it, as Roz stood a good chance of driving her back to fundamentalism. That doesn’t make Roz a horrible person, but it reminds me of some horrible people I know.
1) Treated Joyce like trash for taking longer to reach the point of acceptance she was at and attacked her for it.
2) Tried to pin the responsibility of teaching Joyce on Dorothy for some reason as if it is her fault that Joyce took time to get there???
3) Essentially told Leslie, a lesbian, that she should be outraged at Joyce taking time to learn LGBT+ views that she finds more acceptable.
In general Roz is someone with the right views and right intentions but her methods are horrible and her anger is misplaced.
She released a sex tape, giving people all the incentive needed to slutshame her in an effort to argue AGAINST slutshaming – this is a terrible way to go about it as it backfiring wouldn’t be a surprise to anyone ever.
She wants to get people to have the same views as her but she goes about it by shouting at the people learning them and talking over the very people she is supposedly protecting.
Roz’s heart is in the right place, but her ways of going about it have been seriously wrong.
Looking up the list above me, I’m just going to casually and quietly note that the character who has been shown on screen to have absolutely fantastic consent practices and who has gone out of her way even while sleepy to try and be inclusive to her sister and who has reached out every time except that one when she’s realized she’s hit a nerve gets pilloried for made-up stuff about her consent practices and sexual dynamics and the time she was an asshole to Joyce and Leslie (which is totally her bad)
While the character with absolutely terrible consent practices on screen, who has been seen sexually harassing multiple characters, and who has regularly attacked Joyce including when she’s already visibly upset and college famous for having been through recent trauma, tends to get “gosh, this guy is awesome” and praised for his theoretical positive sexual practices.
And then I’m going to highlight the words “double standards”.
She has to deal with Republican Robin AND Mary all in one day. If i were in her shoes SOMEONE would be getting shanked (and i can’t guarantee it’d be just one.)
For some reason a lot of more conservative and fun die communities like to ignore Luke and focus on Mark or Matthew instead. It seriously disturbing that so many people who identify as Christian forget about passages like this.
Yes, but based on Jesus’ description of hell, you wouldn’t ever see them. You wouldn’t see demons either. You might see people across an uncrossable chasm enter into heaven, but no matter how much you shout they won’t hear you. Whomever meets them there might, but, y’know, uncrossable chasm and all. Also, the agonizing fire.
My main problem with hell is that there is nothing on this planet you could do that would warrant it, you could launch every nuclear bomb at once, and you would not build up enough bad karma to warrant suffering forever.
ARGUABLY you could bioengineer a disease that never gets cured and causes suffering for the entire lifespan of the human species (and any descendant species).
….
But yeah, it’s a really disproportionate punishment even if you DO buy into the idea of retributive justice (as opposed to, say, restorative).
While England got really nuts with it so that the sun wouldn’t set on the British empire, it in’t just Europe known for imperialism. China’s expansion was nightmarish for a number of peoples due to a very high emphasis on class. But a number of Europe’s moves were motivated to push religion, whether it was France trying Protestants with heresy against the Catholic church, or Henry VIII’s Protestant reformation which would be eventually used to excuse many atrocities done to a mostly Catholic Ireland.
I doubt hell would be horrible in the long run. There is no torture, no matter how painful, that the human mind will not eventually fetishise after long exposure to it.
Thanks for this strip. After the brief few days since last we saw her, I was beginning to forget how awful Mary is. Was? Subject-verb agreement can be tricky.
Maybe it’s because Robin forgave Roz for the sex video and general promiscuity. Mary isn’t much into forgiveness. Her family values is about shaming people and coercing them into the “righteous” path, not forgiving their sins and loving them as they are. Plus, Robin isn’t sincere in her platform of family values, she’s just doing it for popularity ratings and votes. Mary, as Roz’s roommate, would likely be aware of that. http://www.dumbingofage.com/2011/comic/book-1/06-yesterday-was-thursday/forgiveness/
1) Catholic (never underestimate how much fundies hate catholics)
2) Relation to Roz (cause remember her going off on Riley)
3) Catholic (seriously never underestimate how much fundies hate catholics)
I’m sort of surprised that Mary is that vehemently opposed to Robin. Usually the Republican representative is the favoured one of Christians like Mary. Is it just because she’s related to Roz? Is she not sufficiently ‘Christian’ for Mary?
Yeah, this, though that happened about 2 strips in for me. I’m torn between “At least she’s a good villain” and “If the wood chipper is still working after Blaine and Toedad, maybe we can also guarantee Mary will never show up again.”
I was okay with Carla riffing on her. Right now, I feel like I’ve hit my Mary quota. Even it this strip is setting her up for some pain later, it’s not worth it.
“more him less me” wow i didn’t think i’d ever find a tshirt that’d ever upset me more than that stupid “good, better, best” marriage shirt but welp there it is
Maybe Robin is Catholic, and Mary is one of those conservative Protestants whose church still considers the Roman Catholic Church as the Whore of Babylon.
Ok, I can maybe kinda see Nazism (Hitler growing up in a Catholic Austrian family and some of his earliest supporters being far-right Bavarian Catholics and all that) but c’mon Communism and Islam as well? Liberation theology didn’t start until nearly a century after Marx who called religion “the opiate of the masses” and Muhammad would have had contact with Coptic, Nestorian, and Monothelite Christians. Why does no one ever study history?
Actually according to chick tracts dnd is a pagan witch cult. Something I don’t really understand as a deterrent. I mean, “Do this and you will gain magical powers, so don’t do it !” does not sound really convincing .
Jesus Christ, could you please smack Mary upside the head? Or at least send some good karma Roz’s way? She kinda deserves a reward for somehow not murdering Mary, and still trying to be slightly friendly to her.
“HEY! I just got smacked upside the head by some brown-skinned curly-haired guy with one of those jew hats! HATE CRIME! HATE CRIME! Christians are so persecuted in this society!”
For some reason, I can’t hate Mary. I don’t agree with her in any way shape or form, I love Carla, and any other transgender/gay characters. But for some reason I don’t have the same intense hatred that everyone else has. Maybe if I actually had to deal with her, I’d hate her more. Although I have had people describe me as way too forgiving.
Our church just got finished going over John 15:1-17.
For five weeks.
In light of that, and my tendency to rarely open a bible otherwise, the Fig tree story takes on a different light.
But on the other hand, Mary really gets my goat. Or at least she strongly reminds me of one.
That makes sense. I grew up with Mary types so Mary tends to be deeply deeply familiar to me, and so I envy anyone who has managed to mostly avoid the Marys of the world.
If Howard Stern and Rush Limbaugh were female college teens who shared a room, I think they’d be these two. Opposite in beliefs, yet both unbearably loud and obnoxious.
If Mary’s not being sarcastic in panel 2, then probably she dislikes Robin as insufficiently steadfast or genuine in her religious conservatism. Probably would have favoured Cruz over Trump in the 2016 R primary.
For some True Believers (no matter the cause), being insufficiently enthusiastic about their “side” is the same as being on the opposite side. See: Willisverse Mary, most Libertarians.
I favored pretty much everyone over Trump in the primary.
Still haven’t decided about the General Election, but a third-party is looking more defensible and appealing.
I want to be able to say I didn’t vote for either, and yet still be able to say I voted.
Sad to say, Sean, that 2000 showed us that voting for a protest candidate is in effect voting in favor of the person you least want in office. (At least, I feel pretty secure in believing that if Nader had sat that one out, none of the people who voted for him would have gone with Bush.)
And this election is the one where I hear the words of Lazarus Long most strongly: “If you live in a society that permits you to vote, do so. There may not be anything or anyone you wish to vote for – but there’s bound to be someone you want to vote against.“
Well, I couldn’t vote in ’92. I didn’t vote for Her in ’96, and Trump’s the Eminent Domain candidate, so I don’t want to vote for Him either.
So I very much want to vote Against both of them.
Maybe we’ll be really lucky and there’ll be a quorum of others who also want to vote against the both of them. Or at least enough that congress stays at the Presidents throat, knowing there is no favor to be had for cozying up to either one.
For Roz, she knows killing Mary is the last thing her sister needs. Hell, look at how much shit was raised when Roz, a consenting adult, had consensual sex with Joe, another consenting adult, and said consensual sex was recorded consensually (both parties doing the sexing knew about the filming and were okay with it) and it was released online.
For Mary, I’m betting she had a long hard talk with her youth group leader at her church (either her home church or the one she attends at college) which set her on her “God’s gentle reminder” kick for such a heathen as Roz.
Other than that, good diet, exercise, and avoiding high risk situations like Toedad’s gun spree on campus…
I really doubt that Roz has been, AT ALL, motivated by making her sister’s campaign look good. Dean Dean stopped her from making more sex tapes by offering to throw her out of the dorms.
I believe it has something to do with the fact that murder is illegal, definitely grounds for expulsion, and (I think) a violation of the Bible. “Thou shall not kill” and all that.
That “Thou shalt not kill” thing isn’t something that the truly committed actually believe in. Hell, just last year there was a Christian conference that then presidential candidates Mike Huckabee, Ted Cruz, and Bobby Jindal all took part in. These presidential candidates all came out and gave speeches after their host, Kevin Swanson, gave a uproarious speech about how the government needs to round up all the gays in the country and execute them. No, I am not making that up nor am I putting words in his mouth. His speech, which none of those candidates criticized or disavowed when they gave their follow up speeches, is easily found online and boy, does he sound unhinged.
At the words of firefly.
Zoë: Preacher, don’t the Bible have some pretty specific things to say about killin’?
Book: Quite specific. It is, however, somewhat fuzzier on the subject of kneecaps
Charisma, an abusive childhood, a quack Doctor pumping them full of drugs, four years of military experience in trench warfare, and a failed art career? Wait. That last one and maybe the second one are both possibilities for Mary…
You certainly can edit dialog before the comic is posted. To make Mary much more clear-cut nuts than she might have come off back in January when all the ‘sad bigots’ started bongoing. If you want to say it was like this all along then just say so, no need to be condescending about it.
Maybe I’m condescending because you’re repeating an annoying pattern of hostility I’m fucking tired of. Again and again, I write some sort of marginalized person in trouble, some sea of offsite trolls takes the side of the villain, and then when the villain continues being kind of terrible, I am accused — again, repeatedly — of going back and changing things just to win some dumb Internet argument. Because the simplest answer isn’t “oh well maybe this character was just always awful and maybe we’re a little bit wrong,” it’s “CONSPIRACY AGAINST US!” The piece of strip that makes them wrong must somehow be de-legitimized. I’m “forcing” Mary to be worse, now! It’s not like she was protesting Riley DeSanto’s visit in 2013 by waiting out in the hallway like a monster person — it’s not like she was slutshaming Billie while secretly sleeping around in friggin’ 1999 — no, Mary is only terrible NOW, because I guess her misgendering Carla just wasn’t actually all that bad and now I have to make her worse. So, yes, I’m going to be AMAZINGLY condescending. You’re pushing a bonkers fantasy narrative that, whether intentional or not, placates a bunch of wrongheaded delusional bigots. Condescending is the least of what I should be.
And no, other than the final two words of the strip (which folks can see on Patreon), this strip has not been altered since I drew it in March.
(as an aside, I thought this strip would sidestep that trend by depicting a Mary who’s kind of softly hilariously jerky in a nonbigoted way, and not as an absolute total Nazi, BUT HA HA HA NO)
If it makes you feel any better, I was all ready to post about how Mary might be getting a bit better–with that bit about hating Robin, and the fact that her last comment sounds more like a joke.
It actually surprised me how many people think she’s being even worse than before.
It felt like she was channeling Mike for me. If it wasn’t for the bigot-fueled storyline that just passed I’d probably find her to be a comic relief/foil.
Well, semi-seriously to Drath, there’s the fact that the nazis were heavily motivated by religious bigotry, specifically Lutheranism. That’s a little thing we tend to erase in the west in favor of a narrative of them being evil pagan science atheists whose religious arguments for the extermination of Jews was coincidental at best.
I find your response reprehensible. If I am a bigot, so are you. You cannot handle criticism. You feel you are entitled to insult anyone and anything that raises an eyebrow at your lackluster writing and generally poor storytelling. You respond with insults and condescending retort that show a severe lack of confidence in your own work.
While you were unaware of it, I am a PoC female who doesn’t appreciate being bullied by you or your cronies for pointing out a negative. But hey, you’re a CIS White Male so I should go to the back of the bus and be quiet.
Me: “I get a very strong feeling that you are arguing in bad faith, let me put on my snarky face.”
You: “You’re being so mean to me.”
Me: “Fine, let me explain exactly why I feel you are arguing in bad faith!”
You: “I’VE ALWAYS HATED YOU AND YOUR DUMB STRIP”
Me: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
May I suggest you stop responding to Zasz directly after this particular point Willis? Your deadly sin is Wrath, and that makes trolls eye you like a delicious steak.
As a fan of your strips, I’d rather you have a happy life than trying to quash conspiracy theorists.
I’m kinda torn on that, his wrathful rants are usually inspiring, but I also don’t want his time to be devoured by moderating the comments section when said trolls do crop up.
I mean, I don’t want to see Willis go through any type of pain and suffering, but speaking only for myself, seeing him go off on some bigot definitely makes the space feel a bit safer and welcoming to marginalized bigots. Also, from personal experience, I know ripping apart bigots can be hella therapeutic in moderation.
Damnit, Willis, the ruse has been rumbled. You might as well reveal the secret time machine you’ve been using to win petty arguments against conspiracy-addicted bigots.
Cause, it’s not like you could possibly prove them wrong by continuing to present a character as she is rather than as they want her to be to stick it to marginalized people.
On a side note, it never ceases to amaze me how full of themselves bigots are. Like, the arguments that trans people are just transitioning to fool or confuse cis people or the arguments that gay people will of course find homophobes so irresistible that they’ll just be immediately drawn into assaulting them or this argument here.
It really seems like they are fundamentally incapable of grasping that part of the world has nothing to do with them or their daily life.
You didn’t point out an inconsistency with Mary’s dialog. You pointed out a perceived inconsistency with Mary’s dialog and then basically accused Willis of editing the comic in response to what happened last week, despite the fact that he has repeatedly, repeatedly stated that he doesn’t ever do this.
Comment section DV, I believe. People stating their dislike of Mary, and Zasz saying that Mary’s ‘evilness’ here is being shoehorned in response to it, when this comic was written months ago, and it’s just her character, not pandering to the comment section.
But what if they weren’t? I’m not claiming that they definitely aren’t, just acknowledging the possibility that they might not be. Neither you nor I can know with certainty that x equals x, so it would be intellectually dishonest to claim that it does. Therefore, my statement that x does not equal x has the same validity as your statement, and any disagreement on this point would be a violation of my Freedom of Speech.
I’m hoping that eventually Mary just winds up being that one mom everyone knew growing up who worked at Wal-Mart because her degree is the most useless piece of crap because she’s an ass.
I kind of feel like this is a surprisingly good roommate match, or at least not the worst. Mary likes to target people she thinks are weak or vulnerable, but I feel like Roz would push back on Mary’s bs, and they’d both more or less tire of arguing with each other after like a week or two. It weirdly balances out a little.
It’s still no fun to be the Roz of the equation (sadly know that one from experience). And if she’s anything like I was back then, I imagine she’s bailing out of far more arguments than she’s pursuing.
first I would buy a puppy, then I would give the puppy to Mary and waited tell she bonded with it, then I would give Carla a new pair of skates. In disguise I would later steal both items, while leaving a note for both of them, creating a series of challenges forcing them into some form of teeth clenched teamwork.
Wait I’m confused, am I harming the puppy because I’m giving it to Mary or because of the whole dognapping thing? Cause I wouldn’t actually hurt the puppy, I’m not a monster.
The dognapping. As horrible as Mary is, I maintain a belief that relatively few people will hurt a puppy. Even someone as spiteful as Mary. Said belief might be unrealistic, but it’s one of the few things keeping me sane in this world, so I will stand by it.
She wouldn’t intentionally hurt the puppy. But she seems about as stupid as the person who starved a dog because they weren’t willing to believe that dogs are carnivores.
Then the best course of action is to raise the hypothetical puppy yourself, as giving a puppy to Mary may harm the puppy emotionally. Also, dorms are not known for their allowance of pets.
Perhaps a stuffed one, in a downwards pose? Could tell her it’s praying, and that’s how it sustains itself, so it needs neither food nor drink nor walks?
Funny enough the puppy thing was my least evil plan, my most evil planned involved kidnapping both Mary and Carla, tying up Carla and giving Mary a gun loaded with blanks. I would then say something to Mary like, “so if you really hate her that much, here’s your chance to be rid of her, or you could walk away and Carla would go free, make your choice Mary Bradford…show me what your are in the dark.”
It’s possible that Mary is from a branch of Christianity that regards all politics as worldly and all politicians as having turned away from God to pursue worldly power.
You don’t? We do. Is your state a de-facto one-party state?
I don’t recall ever voting between multiple Republicans, (or “Republicans”), and multiple Democrats in a November election, for any seat.
Maybe my memory is just flawed, but a quick check of my states election board webpage suggests otherwise.
We have that. It’s a top-two primary so sometimes it’ll be D vs. D or R vs. R or very occasionally D vs. Lliberatarian or D vs. Green or Socialist. Where I’m from in Seattle it’s pretty hilarious – we have like three tiny socialist parties and one Maoist in the form of the Revolutionary Communist Party. They get three digits in votes sometimes!
That’s a general election. A primary election narrows the field of candidates (usually within political parties) before a general election. There still in September I think.
I like this strip for humanizing Mary. Like, I dunno, this banter feels pretty natural to me. I will never like her as a person, but giving her some downtime from being the mean rotten bigot seems like a good change of pace.
That’s still pretty low on levels of awfulness compared to what Mary has done in the past. When she has no right to condemn her, at least the sex is an actual choice.
Heh, I really enjoy their banter. These are two people with very little love for each other who nevertheless had decided to stay somewhat civil because they share a room.
I truly believe Mary tries to agree with Roz in the second panel, just in a very… Mary way.
It was a finely crafted snide remark in the fourth panel.
I want to imagine this is Roz’s every morning. Waking up, trying to make some pleasant small talk with Mary, and then remembering why she never bothers.
DOA Mary is uglier and more vicious than Roomies Mary. She reminds me of a girl I met at my first cast party. Before, the play she bragged how she wasn’t like other cast members and couldn’t be corrupted. At the casting party she made out with a number of people men and women. I guess what I’m saying is: Mary seems like the kind of person who needs an invitation and she hasn’t gotten it yet. You have to be open to such things, too . Or maybe she keeps it on the DL like in Roomies?
…see, if it were coming from someone capable of humor or self-deprecation, Mary’s dialogue might be moderately finny banter. From her it’s just unironic awfulness.
The worrying thing is that I really think that Mary believes that. This explains so much about her personality and behaviour. It also seriously opens the door to her having an undiagnosed narcissistic personality disorder.
Wait, what if she was diagnosed with something, but rather then get her proper therapy and care her parents had her try to use religion to solve her issues?
Asshole-ism is actually significantly less likely in those who have mental illnesses, at least if you look at crime statistics. Those with mental illnesses are far less likely to commit crimes and far more likely to become the victims of them, especially violent crimes.
Honestly if I roomed with Mary, and then heard Joyce spout the things she usually says in gender studies/around Roz, I’d probably be harsh against Joyce too. Unfair I know! But like it’s easy to displace it.
I wonder if it takes a lot of practice to be this awful. I mean, does Mary have to stand in front of the mirror every morning and practice being the most awful and evil version of herself she possibly can be, or does it just come naturally to her?
Mary is like a hole from which God’s Glory can escape. A Glory hole, if you will.
I doubt I’m the first to make this joke, but I’m not about to read all those comments.
If I had to choose between a punch in the balls every morning, or having Mary as a roommate, I would still probably pick Mary, if only because it would be easier to preemptively kill her than it would be for a disembodied punching apparatus.
Mary just kind of makes me laugh at this point. She’s so friggin’ toothless it’d be like getting mad at the Brain for trying to take over the world.
Both of Mary’s evil plans have been foiled by pies to face and Ruth not caring enough to be blackmailed. Step up your game, Mary. You’re only running on 0.03 kilorosses at this point.
Oh, now Mary makes sense to me. She’s like that movement that wanted to make life on Earth so horrible and brutal people would go to Heaven faster and feel better once there. While Atheists work to create Heaven on Earth, Mary tries to be Hell to everyone around her.
Well, you know Historical Jesus was a character in Shortpacked, so it could happen. Not sure how, since DOA is supposed to be grounded in reality, but it could happen.
I feel like I’d tolerate Mary a lot more if her last line in this was meant to be sarcastic. I mean, I’d also have to ignore everything else she has ever done ever, but still.
Historical Jesus would be perfect for a crazy homeless guy living around campus. He’d be all like “I am Jesus, your savoir! Someone bring me a fish and I’ll clone it for you.”
If he’s cloning fish, he’s more likely a graduate student in genetics. It’s sometimes easy to confuse graduate students for crazy homeless guys, though.
Mary doesn’t even have to die! She just has to stay hidden, even from her roommate. I…I really thought after Carla’s brilliant humiliation of her, that’s what should happen, for a few months at least.
You must have fairly nice worst enemies, the one guy who I know personally who could be considered my worst enemy is so much worse. Think, Sexist Blaine like asshole who harassed high school girls and resigned after it turned out he was cheating just so so much.
I’ve been staring at this strip for 10minutes now, trying to figure out why I love it so much, and I finally got it: it perfectly exemplifies the importance of context!
If this is your first run-in with Mary, then her last line, hells, even her EXPRESSION, comes out as snarky. It’s only for more familiar people that it becomes “uh, no. Pick up a dictionary.”
Mary is rude and unpleasant, but panel 2 is pretty funny, whether she genuinely dislikes Robin or is simply snarking in response to panel 1. It also seems a bit nerdy… which isn’t surprising given that Mary’s here for anime-style art lessons.
… Oh I do believe I would have murdered Mary a long time ago. Not because she’s religious, but because she’s so conceited that she believes herself to be an exemplary member of her chosen “tribe,” for lack of a better term.
I would do worse than spell my name out in laser light. I would be constantly preaching the language of science to her… Like an evangelical Dina.
So, I’m really interested in Joyce’s fathers future character development. I think it’s going to say a lot about Willis’ view of religious/conservative people. I wonder if he will be able to be portrayed as both religious/conservative and reasonable. I think all other characters have been portrayed as one or the other.
I also wonder if Joyce, as a reasonable but misguided character will be become an atheist at the end of her character arc or if she will find some sort of middle ground. Basically I’m hoping that Joyce, her brother and her father, break the trend of this dichotomy between religion and reason.
Joyce is, to a certain extent, autobiographical – I *think* Willis is an atheist (but Jesus was an okay guy), so that’s likely where Joyce will end up. I s’pose Hank will end up wherever Willis’s father wound up?
Also, counterpoint: you can either be a religious conservative or reasonable – there is no overlap. If you mean either religious or conservative, and reasonable, there’s plenty of characters that fit the bill. The only atheists around seem to be Dorothy and Dina.
I am just counting down the days until the reason for Marys obnoxious behavior is revealed, showing her to be a flawed human coping with some form of heavy duty problems, making me feel like an ass for hating her right now.
There’s something wrong with Galasso? I mean, there is, but I think it’s congenital, not a state of maliciousness.
Hard to hate someone for being so gender blind he’s suffering a social handicap.
Now, how he survived high school with that ego, I’ll never understand.
Y’know, it’s funny. I’ve been reading this strip since it began (and I read all of Roomies and Shortpacked before this), but it’s only occurred to me just now that Mary has to truly believe that everyone sees the world as she does.
Me if I ever see Tony Hawk: Hey you’re Tony Hawk the famous skateboarder. That’s right I recognise you. Won’t be able to get any content out of this will you, you piece of shit
How to read all 28 issues of my Spider-Man Loves Mary Jane run on Marvel Unlimited:
1: The first four issues were published as the miniseries "Mary Jane."
www.marvel.com/comics/serie...
today in #9chickweedlane i learned we have to be shown children learning and relearning what sex is, for Reasons, even though they already clearly know and have prepared nuanced questions about it!
also that Gran must hate, if she's still alive, how Old Juliette is the same but with gray hair
one of my favorite things is when a commenter explodes WHEN DO THESE CHARACTERS GET THERAPY but directed towards a character who canonically has a regular therapist
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btw if you're one of those rando bluesky weirdos who doesn't know me but sees me in the wild being sarcastic and don't know i'm being sarcastic because you haven't taken like 30 seconds to, like, maybe look at my user profile or something, keep walking, you're not going to score internet points here
Here's an entertaining cite at the bottom of the first page
Josh Gerstein@joshgerstein.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
JUST IN: Milwaukee Judge Hannah Dugan moves to dismiss federal criminal case against her for allegedly helping immigrant hide from ICE. Her lawyers say she's protected by official acts & judicial immunity and 10th Amendment. Doc: storage.courtlistener.com/recap/gov.us...
Where did Hollywood go so wrong? I thought movies were supposed to be an escape from reality, a chance to put your worries aside and not have to think about any underlying ideas or concepts. Well, not anymore.
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preternia @preternia.com ⋅ 2d
Josh Gerstein @joshgerstein.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
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I’m surprised they can withstand the proximity of each other’s mere presence… doesn’t the universe a splode if that happens?
They’ve been voted “Room most likely to be the site of a murder investigation” by the others on the floor.
It was closely followed by Ruth’s.
Nah Ruth has the good sense not to murder in such an obvious place to search for clues.
“Idiot, the FIRST PLACE they’ll look is the rooms STRAIGHT UP from where the body hit the ground!”
Let the bodies hit the floor
Let the bodies hit the floor
Ruth: Alright, I’ve got everything I need to rip out their femurs and beat them to death…but my room is the first place they’d look for a body and if that ain’t damning evidence I don’t know what is.
Billie: Mary’s room?
Ruth: Now I remember why I love you.
Soul Calibur meets Soul Edge.
Brb thinking of witty joke.
I wonder how many people have been hit with Roz’s “Heaven’s Gate” maneuver.
But aren’t both swords metaphors for toxic religion? The whole series always seemed to be: ‘kill a bunch of people to claim your rightful power and get what you want.’ Especially with Soul Calibur V having the whole: “Hey, I’m the good sword, now help me kill your sister because she is totally evil! Also, I’m totally your mother and not just using her to get to you!”
Anyway, I’m just saying they can’t both be Mary.
… making one truly epic sword: Soul Edge-Calibur.
Edge-Calibre: The Soul Sword Saga
Every action has an equal and opposite reaction. May they cancel each other out?
Don’t underestimate the universe and the amount of hate, misery, and pompous arrogance it can sustain, after all the US presidential is hasn’t killed it/us yet.
You all act like Mary is sooo hard to be around. “perfect glory’s gentle reminder” Turns out it’s actually real easy. You just have to delude yourself as much as she does.
Or lock her in a closet.
That Becky will then proceed to nuke. I like this plan.
There will be fall-out.
I’ll just have to crawl out through the fallout, baby, to your lovin’ arms.
Perhaps she’s already in a closet.
Noise-cancelling headphones and a lot of nights spent on friends’ futons can go a long way. I’d also look into changing rooms, because if she’s mad over skating in the halls in the middle of the day, you probably can’t breathe in her room without her shouting over a noise disturbance.
Less noise, more noise-maker, there.
True, Mary would hate to be hypocritical about something.
I’ve heard she hates a lot of unchristian things.
I had a friend who had a roommate like Mary. She fixed the problem handily by proceeding to fuck the living daylights out of her boyfriend every time she was in the room.
She changed rooms rather quickly after that.
I’m guessing that last ‘she’ refers to the roommate.
And that ‘her’ means that your friend was banging her own boyfriend, not the roommate’s.
I am sure banging the roommate’s boyfriend would also have done the trick.
Mary can’t be that sensitive to noise; after all, she knows about Roz’s vibrating toys, which kind of implies that Roz has used them enough for Mary to notice… unless there was a comic I missed that had Roz trying each of her toys in turn, trying to find the quietest one while Mary complained about the racket.
Mary didn’t hear the phone buzz, so she could easily be assuming Roz has vibrators and trying to shame her over it, because ‘obviously’ the “hellbound slut” would own such ‘devilish’ contraptions.
It’s almost like the noise complaint was an excuse and the real problem is “sinners” living in “her” space… *thoughtful chin rub*
I could get along with Mary fine, I’m pretty good at connecting with pretty much anyone who isn’t currently trying to stab me. Plus you have to do something really fucking awful to really piss me off, Ryan and Blaine both pass that limit, as does Toe Dad.
I don’t get riled up easily either, but Mary’s lack of good things to say + her unerring close-mindedness + her justification of her words with her religion = she’d be dead within a month.
Sadly that’s the exact reason why I wouldn’t be able to get along with Mary.
I’m surprised someone who preaches to others so much also takes the lords name in vain so openly and opportunistically.
Also, could we get an entire story that’s just mary and roz,(something like walking with dina)I’m really interested in seeing how these two live together and make things work given they’ve shared a room for – five weeks now?
I haven’t been Christian for a long time, but I’m pretty sure that mentioning His name when talking about His will doesn’t count as taking His name in vain. The “in vain” part implies a lack of purpose.
I was referring to all of her blatant unapologetic uttering of the GD (god d…) in this comic. that would count as taking (using) his name in vain
Wasn’t Mary a major hypocrite in the old continuity?
That changed???
No, she literally wants God to damn everyone and everything.
That, and ‘God’ isn’t a name so much as YHWH’s job description.
i was just wondering if mary is now a jesus/christian hipster as she is wearing one of the most ironic shirt ever!
if she is she sucks more.
Only in they come into physical contact. Like matter / anti-matter.
As an aside: I didn’t think it was possible for me to detest Mary any more than I already did. Well played, Willis. Well played.
Robin and Mary in the same storyline?
Eunngghhh.
Yesterday: Robin and girl who looks like Mary.
Today: Girl who looks like Robin, and Mary.
#CONSPIRACY
Hashtags are so yesterday’s comic.
#Hashtagsareforever
That hashtag is way too long though. I mean, eighteen characters? You’re doing better than Robin, but not by much.
And the word “hashtag” is so five minutes ago. Everybody who’s anybody knows the right term is “octothorpe”.
#IHateTheStandards
#longhashtagsbesthashtagscan’tstopwon’tstop
Now, I want to see a one hundred forty ONE character hashtag.
@SeanR: John Oliver has you covered.
#WeUnderstandThatAsCorporateEntitiesOurPresenceInCertainDiscussionsIsNotAlwaysRequiredSoWeWillStriveToLimitOurActivitiesToJustSellingYouShit
#Hashtagsareforever
I read that and I can’t help but think it’ll be the name of a douchey James Bond remake after Daniel Craig leaves.
#hashtagsgoonforever, you mean.
Well played.
Gronkowski for the next BondNow I’ve got Shirley Bassey in my head singing “Hash tags are
for ever” over and over …
I tried watching one of the Craig Bond films. I like Craig, he’s a good actor – Layer Cake, Sword of Honour etc. I lasted 5 minutes of preposterous “action” before switching off.
Even Ian Fleming found Bond boring after two books. Like most British heroes, he’s a shallow thug with charm.
Now I’ve got Shirley Bassey in my head singing “Hash tags are
for ever” over and over …
Yeah, that’s what I heard as I typed out my post. That, and the visual of Kanye West in the studio making this happen.
#jetbeamsdontsteelmelt
Oh shite.
This story can only end with Roz waking up in bed with Frieda and Robin waking up in bed with Mary.
…..
…. actually, given everyone’s orientations, I’m pretty sure it CAN’T end that way. Unless there is much screaming.
Mary’s learned very little from yesterday…
I don’t think she learned anything.
mary learns?
Not that we’ve seen…
So, more shenanigans inspired by Looney Tunes and Tom and Jerry?
It’s very selective learning.
She learnt that most of Roz’s toys vibrate. How is a mystery.
Mary’s job is to never learn
Everyone else’s job is to learn from Mary’s perfection.
Hail Mary, full of grace.
In Jesus’ name we go to FIFTH BASE!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j8ZF_R_j0OY
So a totally legal back-door!
Thank-you Thank-you I’ll be here all week. Try the veal!
Which tells me that she’s only at college to be a plague to others.
Seeing her where the “More him Less me” shirt, I thought it might be a sign she’s lost some pride, finally realizing she’s not god’s greatest creation everyone should revere and aspire to be. And then she opened her mouth.
That implies she can learn.
I am fully confident that she can learn various techniques to be even more annoyingly noisome-Christian. No, I don’t by into the notion that there is a maximum rank for that skill.
If anything, she may feel justified in her thinking.
“Gentle reminder”?( bursts into laugh)
Oh yeah.
rolf at that self description/deluded statement.
Kinda reminds me of this.
Mary even you should know that you of all people are not “gentle”
Well, she’s never threatened anyone with a shotgun for being a sinner.
When that’s your idea of a firm, but acceptable amount of force, Mary is as gentle you can get.
…… is that MORE or LESS horrific than threatening them with literally eternal literal torture that is literally beyond any pain that can be experienced by a living person?
Depends if other people will see and be traumatised by the torture.
Um, let’s go with the idea that the people in heaven get to look down and see the people in hell being tortured, but maybe they were hoping to see just that, and spent a lot of their lives saying so.
I’m not threatening you with eternal torture, I’m warning you that it’s going to happen if you don’t change your ways.
Of course if you do change your ways and accept Jesus Christ as your personal savior, confess all your sins, and eat this cracker, you don’t get to hang out with all the other cool people getting tortured in hell.
That’s the plot of the video for Engel by Rammstein.
“I’m not judging you. But I’m kind of looking forward to hearing the verdict.”
It must be exhausting to live with a person who isn’t even capable of holding a casual conversation with you. I feel for ya, Roz.
You still kind of suck ass though. (But way better than your Walkyverse version.)
Eh, what’s she DONE really? Aside from make a sex tape with Joe (which he consented to) and chewing out Joyce that one time? (Which, considering the last time they’d met, Joyce was slut shaming her over the sex tape, i’d say was warranted, but that’s me)
She released the sex tape without Joe’s consent, though.
And Joyce had just made improvements in her worldview, which Roz took as a chance to slam on her. Now, Joyce needs to be taken to task on occasion, but that was the worst time to do it, as Roz stood a good chance of driving her back to fundamentalism. That doesn’t make Roz a horrible person, but it reminds me of some horrible people I know.
Joe said, clearly, he knew about it and consented.
Not with it being shared though.
No, she told him she was going to do that.
She uses a message of sexual openness and acceptance as a bludgeon to hit people over the head. It makes me resent her even more.
She’s just been kind of a jerk overall. Nothing compared to some of the things her Walkyverse counterpart has done, though.
1) Treated Joyce like trash for taking longer to reach the point of acceptance she was at and attacked her for it.
2) Tried to pin the responsibility of teaching Joyce on Dorothy for some reason as if it is her fault that Joyce took time to get there???
3) Essentially told Leslie, a lesbian, that she should be outraged at Joyce taking time to learn LGBT+ views that she finds more acceptable.
In general Roz is someone with the right views and right intentions but her methods are horrible and her anger is misplaced.
She released a sex tape, giving people all the incentive needed to slutshame her in an effort to argue AGAINST slutshaming – this is a terrible way to go about it as it backfiring wouldn’t be a surprise to anyone ever.
She wants to get people to have the same views as her but she goes about it by shouting at the people learning them and talking over the very people she is supposedly protecting.
Roz’s heart is in the right place, but her ways of going about it have been seriously wrong.
Don’t forget the part where she was constantly preaching about protection in sexual encounters, then proceeds to film a “bareback” tape
Wait, it was bareback? I don’t remember that detail. It’s especially weird since she’s shown using a condom in a Slipshine comic
Not bareback, it’s been confirmed in Slipshine that all her sexual encounters are done with condoms.
There’re all kinds of reasons to not like Roz so there’s no reason to make stuff up. Roz + Joe totally used protection. trust me
Looking up the list above me, I’m just going to casually and quietly note that the character who has been shown on screen to have absolutely fantastic consent practices and who has gone out of her way even while sleepy to try and be inclusive to her sister and who has reached out every time except that one when she’s realized she’s hit a nerve gets pilloried for made-up stuff about her consent practices and sexual dynamics and the time she was an asshole to Joyce and Leslie (which is totally her bad)
While the character with absolutely terrible consent practices on screen, who has been seen sexually harassing multiple characters, and who has regularly attacked Joyce including when she’s already visibly upset and college famous for having been through recent trauma, tends to get “gosh, this guy is awesome” and praised for his theoretical positive sexual practices.
And then I’m going to highlight the words “double standards”.
Pretty fucking much.
I feel sorry for Roz right now.
She has to deal with Republican Robin AND Mary all in one day. If i were in her shoes SOMEONE would be getting shanked (and i can’t guarantee it’d be just one.)
Meep. Everyone slowly steps away from the homicidal maniac.
Everyone? Do I have to?
Nah, I’m staying in the Crazy Club too.
But at least you will know that Roz will put a rubber on her shiv
She practices safe stab?
She knows all the techniques and devices. She’s a mistress of lay-techs.
She’s caring. She doesnt want her victims to die of blood-poisoning.
Is that t-shirt for sale? :p
yeah! Roz’s shirt would go well with a sweater vest!
Along with a talking Mary body pillow that keeps you up all night with incessant chastising.
You know, it had been a few days since I remembered how much I hate Mary. It’s always nice to be reminded of why.
So fucking humble I mean damn so humble.
Shouldn’t being born-again entail learning humility?
I think Mary missed the memo.
You’d think.
She IS humble. It’s the God speaking THROUGH her that deserves praise and worship.
In her deluded dreams.
Somebody needs to get Mary to re-readLuke 18:9-14.
For some reason a lot of more conservative and fun die communities like to ignore Luke and focus on Mark or Matthew instead. It seriously disturbing that so many people who identify as Christian forget about passages like this.
Supposed to be “fundie” not “fun die” but I think it works both ways now that I look at it carefully.
I think puts everything in perspective.
Sure yo uare Mary. Sure you are.
the power of christ compels you to ignore the vibrators
Roz must have some AMAZING self control since Mary’s still alive.
Mary is a “gentle” reminder why, if there is heaven or hell, I would choose hell. Imagine a lot of people like her!
Wouldn’t they be in hell, too ?
Yes, but based on Jesus’ description of hell, you wouldn’t ever see them. You wouldn’t see demons either. You might see people across an uncrossable chasm enter into heaven, but no matter how much you shout they won’t hear you. Whomever meets them there might, but, y’know, uncrossable chasm and all. Also, the agonizing fire.
I think that’s part of what makes it hell.
I think you have it backwards.
My main problem with hell is that there is nothing on this planet you could do that would warrant it, you could launch every nuclear bomb at once, and you would not build up enough bad karma to warrant suffering forever.
ARGUABLY you could bioengineer a disease that never gets cured and causes suffering for the entire lifespan of the human species (and any descendant species).
….
But yeah, it’s a really disproportionate punishment even if you DO buy into the idea of retributive justice (as opposed to, say, restorative).
Plus, I could never be truly happy in Heaven, if I knew that there were people suffering in Hell.
look, they had to invent SOMETHING to put the fear of God into people
too bad on Earth they let all the truly horrible people committing the gravest of atrocities off with a slap on the wrist, because white dudes
If you think about it, everything was fine until the Europeans decided to expand their territory.
While England got really nuts with it so that the sun wouldn’t set on the British empire, it in’t just Europe known for imperialism. China’s expansion was nightmarish for a number of peoples due to a very high emphasis on class. But a number of Europe’s moves were motivated to push religion, whether it was France trying Protestants with heresy against the Catholic church, or Henry VIII’s Protestant reformation which would be eventually used to excuse many atrocities done to a mostly Catholic Ireland.
I doubt hell would be horrible in the long run. There is no torture, no matter how painful, that the human mind will not eventually fetishise after long exposure to it.
“Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.” – Mark Twain
What’s Mary holding in panel 2?
shower basket
Towel and shower caddy.
It looks like a shower basket thing to bring soap/shampoo to the shower room
She’s probably just back from cleaning the mess Carla did on her face.
Phrasing.
+1
Such things don’t happen by coïncidence
Thanks for this strip. After the brief few days since last we saw her, I was beginning to forget how awful Mary is. Was? Subject-verb agreement can be tricky.
I’d say ‘is’, since presently Mary can be described as awful.
I think this phenomenon is because we simply want to forget Mary. Period.
Why doesn’t Mary like Robin? Usually fundamentalists are big into Family Values candidates, right?
Because “all DeSantoses are MONSTERS”
Obviously. The horns are well hid by the hairdoes.
She probably doesn’t think Robin is tough enough about things.
Maybe it’s because Robin forgave Roz for the sex video and general promiscuity. Mary isn’t much into forgiveness. Her family values is about shaming people and coercing them into the “righteous” path, not forgiving their sins and loving them as they are. Plus, Robin isn’t sincere in her platform of family values, she’s just doing it for popularity ratings and votes. Mary, as Roz’s roommate, would likely be aware of that. http://www.dumbingofage.com/2011/comic/book-1/06-yesterday-was-thursday/forgiveness/
Mary hates everyone.
If I had to guess the reasons are probably:
1) Catholic (never underestimate how much fundies hate catholics)
2) Relation to Roz (cause remember her going off on Riley)
3) Catholic (seriously never underestimate how much fundies hate catholics)
I’m sort of surprised that Mary is that vehemently opposed to Robin. Usually the Republican representative is the favoured one of Christians like Mary. Is it just because she’s related to Roz? Is she not sufficiently ‘Christian’ for Mary?
Because she’s Hispanic and a woman maybe? I put nothing past Mary now.
Well there is the “Constitution” Party which is mostly Christian far-right but just short of Christian Identity.
Maybe it’s the primaries?
This a congressional race not the presidential race. Also the Constitution Party is a real political party. Unlike the libertarian party.
How is it that they haven’t tried to kill each other yet? Or at least a climactic sword duel while atop a train or something.
I’m at the point where Mary isn’t funny anymore, she’s just unpleasant.
We passed that point LONG ago.
Yeah, this, though that happened about 2 strips in for me. I’m torn between “At least she’s a good villain” and “If the wood chipper is still working after Blaine and Toedad, maybe we can also guarantee Mary will never show up again.”
Mary was ever funny?
When we first met her for like one panel.
She was funny when she had a penis on her cheek that one time.
And also when she was covered with pie.
AH! YEs… Her covered in Pie was humorous. But I consider that to be more attributed to Carla’s brilliance
I was okay with Carla riffing on her. Right now, I feel like I’ve hit my Mary quota. Even it this strip is setting her up for some pain later, it’s not worth it.
Honestly this strip is the funniest she’s been in a long time.
@AltText Wait, so Robin is Tarkin…
Does that make the Aide Darth Vader?!
No, but I think it means that destroying Robin’s campaign involves firing photon candy into her thermal exhaust port (mouth).
Fanart of Leslie as an X-wing pilot is needed!
“You are a member of the Liberal Alliance and a traitor! TAKE HER AWAY!”
How has Roz not murdered Mary?
She makes love, not war.
Boy, the hatesex must be great.
She’s being paid a large sum of money not to?
She derives schadenfreude from the knowledge that she is making Mary’s existence just as miserable as Mary is making hers.
That kinda makes sense.
Lord, thy holy mouthpiece sounds like barbed wire on a thousand chalkboards. Change thy system posthaste. Amen.
Damn it Lucifer (Mary) will you shut up your ego is what got you kicked out of Heaven the first time.
That comparison is just plain mean! I mean, c’mon Lucy doesn’t deserve to be equated to Mary!
“more him less me” wow i didn’t think i’d ever find a tshirt that’d ever upset me more than that stupid “good, better, best” marriage shirt but welp there it is
JOY – Jesus first, others second, yourself last
THIS IS A REAL SLOGAN THAT REAL PEOPLE TAKE TO HEART.
I propose OMG- Others equal to Myself, Gods can take care of themselves. I also propose 24/7 sarcasm.
…. I assume you propose it sarcastically.
Yeah, totally. Unless, were you being sarcastic just then?
Crap, I’m stuck in the Sarge/Grif sarcasm argument! Never acknowledge the sarcasm for a secomd joke!
*second
That shirt on “I am the messenger of God, listen to what I say!” Mary is especially hilarious.
Dear god, poor Roz. She definitely wins the “worst roommate on the floor” award.
“Wow, thanks Mary! But don’t trouble yourself. Really.”
Mary, listen to your shirt.
She only does that on laundry day.
I kind of thought Mary would be a fan of Robin.
She isn’t a fan of anyone.
Maybe Robin is Catholic, and Mary is one of those conservative Protestants whose church still considers the Roman Catholic Church as the Whore of Babylon.
Reminds me of Jack Chick, who blames literally everything, from Islam to Nazism to Communism to Freemansonry on the Catholics.
Ok, I can maybe kinda see Nazism (Hitler growing up in a Catholic Austrian family and some of his earliest supporters being far-right Bavarian Catholics and all that) but c’mon Communism and Islam as well? Liberation theology didn’t start until nearly a century after Marx who called religion “the opiate of the masses” and Muhammad would have had contact with Coptic, Nestorian, and Monothelite Christians. Why does no one ever study history?
It’s Jack Chick. His tracts read like the ravings of a paranoid lunatic.
Read “Mama’s Girls.” You will/won’t regret it.
(Short version: according to Chick, Khadija was Catholic, and Communism was a conspiracy to degrade Orthodoxy.)
Uh… I thought he blamed stuff on DnD?
Since when is DnD not a Catholic CommieNazi conspiracy?
Actually according to chick tracts dnd is a pagan witch cult. Something I don’t really understand as a deterrent. I mean, “Do this and you will gain magical powers, so don’t do it !” does not sound really convincing .
Wow, I played a lot of D&D in my day and I never gained any magical powers. Must not have been doing it right
How haven’t they killed each other yet?
At this point? Probably just the Willis ban on death in this comic.
Wow. That is some extraordinarily bad roommate matching.
“God’s gentle reminder”
More like Nybor’s Gentle Reminder
Really just a lot of un-gentle pain
(3E, damn I’m old)
Ah, 3rd Ed D&D, I… well homestly I kinda hated it. I do miss Regdar though, the one I played and the one in Scourge of the Worlds.
3E means you’re old? Oh, sweet summer child…
Ok true, though I was around for 1E too.
Gentle like sandpaper.
40 grit wet-or-dry
She’s perfectly full of glorious bullshit.
I agree with your shirt, Mary. Less you. At this college. GO AWAY.
that shirt is not only really creepy, but given Mary’s sociopathy it’s rather incongruous too
The irony is staggering.
If Mary’s a reminder of anything, it’s that many Christians can be pretty darn un-Christian.
“Love thy neighbor as I have loved you.”
“We can still hate the gays and the foreigners, right?”
“Okay, I’m gonna run that by you again…”
Matthew 25:35-25:46 is pretty damn clear, and pretty damn ignored these days.
Nearly all days, not these ones.
Jesus Christ, could you please smack Mary upside the head? Or at least send some good karma Roz’s way? She kinda deserves a reward for somehow not murdering Mary, and still trying to be slightly friendly to her.
“HEY! I just got smacked upside the head by some brown-skinned curly-haired guy with one of those jew hats! HATE CRIME! HATE CRIME! Christians are so persecuted in this society!”
“Was he wearing a green polo and a blue sash? What’s that about?”
…just where the hell do you think Roz keeps her phone, anyways?
She’s a little unclear on what the term “phone sex” means.
Here I thought I could not despise a fictional character more. Mary proved me wrong. I’ve met too many real people like her.
In the next panel, Roz bursts out laughing. Mary then angrily claims she was serious. Roz starts laughing so hard her sides really start to hurt.
For some reason, I can’t hate Mary. I don’t agree with her in any way shape or form, I love Carla, and any other transgender/gay characters. But for some reason I don’t have the same intense hatred that everyone else has. Maybe if I actually had to deal with her, I’d hate her more. Although I have had people describe me as way too forgiving.
I don’t hate Mary. I just can’t stand her.
I am a long way from perfect, but I know it. Mary does not, will not, can not.
There appears to be absolutely no one on that campus that meets her self imposed rules of conduct. No one she approves of, no one she likes.
If anything I feel sorry for her, but I have no problems feeling sorry for her from the other side of town.
I’m the kind of guy who is really hard to really piss off, but once you do…run.
So just like Jesus? (Exhibit a. Fig tree. Exhibit b. Coin changers in the Temple grounds)
You know, that fig tree event is kinda weird from the side of the apostle.
“I will record my teacher yelling at a tree in front of everyone”
Our church just got finished going over John 15:1-17.
For five weeks.
In light of that, and my tendency to rarely open a bible otherwise, the Fig tree story takes on a different light.
But on the other hand, Mary really gets my goat. Or at least she strongly reminds me of one.
*insert Bible reference about “separating the sheep from the goats” here*
That was just the reference I was aiming for.
I agree. Maybe it’s because I never actually had to deal with people like in rl.
That makes sense. I grew up with Mary types so Mary tends to be deeply deeply familiar to me, and so I envy anyone who has managed to mostly avoid the Marys of the world.
Perfect anal orifice is more accurate. Those who think they’re perfect like holy-go-pious Mary really annoy those of us who are.
Gentle reminder? More like blasting foghorn…or, if we want to get biblical, clanging cymbal.
Mary is the most entertaining character while Walky is the most believable. It’s not close in either instance
A Star Wars quote? I didn’t think you liked Star Wars, David
so mary wants jesus inside her?
Her internet history must be interesting.
Or, you know, not-so-gentle reminder.
If Howard Stern and Rush Limbaugh were female college teens who shared a room, I think they’d be these two. Opposite in beliefs, yet both unbearably loud and obnoxious.
Cue the Howardina/Rushine slashfic in three… two…
Is Mary racist or sexist against Robin? Or is Robin (officially) Catholic? What?
Robin is a sexlady; Mary hates it.
Wait, no, confused Roz and Rob. Hmm. Maybe she feels that Rob is too lenient on Roz and the like?
Robin is related to Roz, Roz is terrible, therefore Robin is terrible. Mary hates Riley for the same reason.
Yes. All of that.
If Mary’s not being sarcastic in panel 2, then probably she dislikes Robin as insufficiently steadfast or genuine in her religious conservatism. Probably would have favoured Cruz over Trump in the 2016 R primary.
even mary has parts of her that are only crummy as opposed to being a total bongo.
For some True Believers (no matter the cause), being insufficiently enthusiastic about their “side” is the same as being on the opposite side. See: Willisverse Mary, most Libertarians.
I favored pretty much everyone over Trump in the primary.
Still haven’t decided about the General Election, but a third-party is looking more defensible and appealing.
I want to be able to say I didn’t vote for either, and yet still be able to say I voted.
Sad to say, Sean, that 2000 showed us that voting for a protest candidate is in effect voting in favor of the person you least want in office. (At least, I feel pretty secure in believing that if Nader had sat that one out, none of the people who voted for him would have gone with Bush.)
And this election is the one where I hear the words of Lazarus Long most strongly: “If you live in a society that permits you to vote, do so. There may not be anything or anyone you wish to vote for – but there’s bound to be someone you want to vote against.“
Well, I couldn’t vote in ’92. I didn’t vote for Her in ’96, and Trump’s the Eminent Domain candidate, so I don’t want to vote for Him either.
So I very much want to vote Against both of them.
Maybe we’ll be really lucky and there’ll be a quorum of others who also want to vote against the both of them. Or at least enough that congress stays at the Presidents throat, knowing there is no favor to be had for cozying up to either one.
How is one of them not dead yet?
For Roz, she knows killing Mary is the last thing her sister needs. Hell, look at how much shit was raised when Roz, a consenting adult, had consensual sex with Joe, another consenting adult, and said consensual sex was recorded consensually (both parties doing the sexing knew about the filming and were okay with it) and it was released online.
For Mary, I’m betting she had a long hard talk with her youth group leader at her church (either her home church or the one she attends at college) which set her on her “God’s gentle reminder” kick for such a heathen as Roz.
Other than that, good diet, exercise, and avoiding high risk situations like Toedad’s gun spree on campus…
I really doubt that Roz has been, AT ALL, motivated by making her sister’s campaign look good. Dean Dean stopped her from making more sex tapes by offering to throw her out of the dorms.
I believe it has something to do with the fact that murder is illegal, definitely grounds for expulsion, and (I think) a violation of the Bible. “Thou shall not kill” and all that.
That “Thou shalt not kill” thing isn’t something that the truly committed actually believe in. Hell, just last year there was a Christian conference that then presidential candidates Mike Huckabee, Ted Cruz, and Bobby Jindal all took part in. These presidential candidates all came out and gave speeches after their host, Kevin Swanson, gave a uproarious speech about how the government needs to round up all the gays in the country and execute them. No, I am not making that up nor am I putting words in his mouth. His speech, which none of those candidates criticized or disavowed when they gave their follow up speeches, is easily found online and boy, does he sound unhinged.
At the words of firefly.
Zoë: Preacher, don’t the Bible have some pretty specific things to say about killin’?
Book: Quite specific. It is, however, somewhat fuzzier on the subject of kneecaps
I have to watch Firefly one of these days.
Roz: She has a strong moral code and murdering would be a strong violation of those moral codes.
Mary: Nowhere to stash the body.
Look, I’m sorry but I saw this on Willis Tumblr and now I really have to see if actually works, because if it does, thats awesome
She was only trying to study
Aw
Filter check?
yep
‘It was Tuesday’ for the ‘SJW’ ‘bongo’.
Though now I wonder if this’ll get deleted.
Oh, it’s caps sensitive. That’s the hitch.
she was only to study
Well I fucked that up
she was only trying to study
Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!
wow, now I really wonder what filter that is
is there a cheatsheet somewhere?
A cheatsheet with the story behind each one could bee an interesting read.
Oh man, I can’t wait until someone legit tries to say that in a comment.
Heeeeeee!
That is the most perfect thing.
Let me test something Else.
I’m coming from 4chan
So why not cover all common capitalizations?
Let me try one:
“Its about Ethics in studying”
I think Roz deserves Saint status or something for not having locked Mary in a closet and thrown away the key.
I wonder where Robin keeps her phone?
Killing Mary, or someone like her, is not murder. It’s like killing Hitler.
there might be a slight difference between bigoted 18 year old vs guy who committed genocide.
A few years and a few followers?
And the fact that he had control over most of Europe?
To my knowledge that followed the years and followers.
Charisma, an abusive childhood, a quack Doctor pumping them full of drugs, four years of military experience in trench warfare, and a failed art career? Wait. That last one and maybe the second one are both possibilities for Mary…
I mean, killing Hitler in his sleep would still be murder, it’d just be justified because it was /fucking hitler/.
Okay, full stop. When you advocate for killing someone because they’re a jerk, you’re acting *worse* than Mary.
Problem is hating Mary, means I have to ignore my own shortcomings…I don’t think I’m as bad as Mary, but neither does she.
Mary’s death is a fixed point in history. Even the Doctor can’t change it.
Mary seems a lot more forced these days. Backlash from the ‘only trying to study’ incident maybe?
yes, when sad bigots shit their pants last week i totally traveled back in time to march 9, 2016 and drew today’s strip
http://dumbingofage.tumblr.com/post/140736487397/twitter-voted-for-roz-june-11-2016
i even put up a twitter poll that day to ask people which panel they wanted to see, roz or mary, before hopping back into my time machine
https://twitter.com/damnyouwillis/status/707491280394305536
I knew it!
Had a rousing week of whack-a-mole?
What does that have to do with how she’s speaking?
I…..
….I can’t “respond” to something from a week ago with something I wrote three months ago?
Like, time is linear, man.
You certainly can edit dialog before the comic is posted. To make Mary much more clear-cut nuts than she might have come off back in January when all the ‘sad bigots’ started bongoing. If you want to say it was like this all along then just say so, no need to be condescending about it.
Maybe I’m condescending because you’re repeating an annoying pattern of hostility I’m fucking tired of. Again and again, I write some sort of marginalized person in trouble, some sea of offsite trolls takes the side of the villain, and then when the villain continues being kind of terrible, I am accused — again, repeatedly — of going back and changing things just to win some dumb Internet argument. Because the simplest answer isn’t “oh well maybe this character was just always awful and maybe we’re a little bit wrong,” it’s “CONSPIRACY AGAINST US!” The piece of strip that makes them wrong must somehow be de-legitimized. I’m “forcing” Mary to be worse, now! It’s not like she was protesting Riley DeSanto’s visit in 2013 by waiting out in the hallway like a monster person — it’s not like she was slutshaming Billie while secretly sleeping around in friggin’ 1999 — no, Mary is only terrible NOW, because I guess her misgendering Carla just wasn’t actually all that bad and now I have to make her worse. So, yes, I’m going to be AMAZINGLY condescending. You’re pushing a bonkers fantasy narrative that, whether intentional or not, placates a bunch of wrongheaded delusional bigots. Condescending is the least of what I should be.
And no, other than the final two words of the strip (which folks can see on Patreon), this strip has not been altered since I drew it in March.
(as an aside, I thought this strip would sidestep that trend by depicting a Mary who’s kind of softly hilariously jerky in a nonbigoted way, and not as an absolute total Nazi, BUT HA HA HA NO)
Not wanting to be pedantic here, but what exactly has fundamental Christianity has to do with national socialism ?
The same way Nazi’s are related to soup, perhaps. That’s a Seinfeld reference.
If it makes you feel any better, I was all ready to post about how Mary might be getting a bit better–with that bit about hating Robin, and the fact that her last comment sounds more like a joke.
It actually surprised me how many people think she’s being even worse than before.
It felt like she was channeling Mike for me. If it wasn’t for the bigot-fueled storyline that just passed I’d probably find her to be a comic relief/foil.
Well, semi-seriously to Drath, there’s the fact that the nazis were heavily motivated by religious bigotry, specifically Lutheranism. That’s a little thing we tend to erase in the west in favor of a narrative of them being evil pagan science atheists whose religious arguments for the extermination of Jews was coincidental at best.
I find your response reprehensible. If I am a bigot, so are you. You cannot handle criticism. You feel you are entitled to insult anyone and anything that raises an eyebrow at your lackluster writing and generally poor storytelling. You respond with insults and condescending retort that show a severe lack of confidence in your own work.
While you were unaware of it, I am a PoC female who doesn’t appreciate being bullied by you or your cronies for pointing out a negative. But hey, you’re a CIS White Male so I should go to the back of the bus and be quiet.
Me: “I get a very strong feeling that you are arguing in bad faith, let me put on my snarky face.”
You: “You’re being so mean to me.”
Me: “Fine, let me explain exactly why I feel you are arguing in bad faith!”
You: “I’VE ALWAYS HATED YOU AND YOUR DUMB STRIP”
Me: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
May I suggest you stop responding to Zasz directly after this particular point Willis? Your deadly sin is Wrath, and that makes trolls eye you like a delicious steak.
As a fan of your strips, I’d rather you have a happy life than trying to quash conspiracy theorists.
but i like wrath
I’m kinda torn on that, his wrathful rants are usually inspiring, but I also don’t want his time to be devoured by moderating the comments section when said trolls do crop up.
And I like being lazy. Yet here I am in law school for some weird reason.
Well, it’s merely a suggestion of course. Prioritize as you like.
I mean, I don’t want to see Willis go through any type of pain and suffering, but speaking only for myself, seeing him go off on some bigot definitely makes the space feel a bit safer and welcoming to marginalized bigots. Also, from personal experience, I know ripping apart bigots can be hella therapeutic in moderation.
Damnit, Willis, the ruse has been rumbled. You might as well reveal the secret time machine you’ve been using to win petty arguments against conspiracy-addicted bigots.
Cause, it’s not like you could possibly prove them wrong by continuing to present a character as she is rather than as they want her to be to stick it to marginalized people.
On a side note, it never ceases to amaze me how full of themselves bigots are. Like, the arguments that trans people are just transitioning to fool or confuse cis people or the arguments that gay people will of course find homophobes so irresistible that they’ll just be immediately drawn into assaulting them or this argument here.
It really seems like they are fundamentally incapable of grasping that part of the world has nothing to do with them or their daily life.
I enjoy how you paint me as a bigot merely for pointing out an inconsistency with Mary’s dialog.
You didn’t point out an inconsistency with Mary’s dialog. You pointed out a perceived inconsistency with Mary’s dialog and then basically accused Willis of editing the comic in response to what happened last week, despite the fact that he has repeatedly, repeatedly stated that he doesn’t ever do this.
What the hell did happen last week? I never get these references. I might need to watch news again >.< .
Comment section DV, I believe. People stating their dislike of Mary, and Zasz saying that Mary’s ‘evilness’ here is being shoehorned in response to it, when this comic was written months ago, and it’s just her character, not pandering to the comment section.
^ I got that part, I red the entire above thread; but they kept referencing some event I wasn’t aware of. *shrug*
BuT *Actually…*
from a non-linear , non-subjective viewpoint Its more like….
*applause*
Yes, I see your point: things are what they are.
But what if they weren’t? I’m not claiming that they definitely aren’t, just acknowledging the possibility that they might not be. Neither you nor I can know with certainty that x equals x, so it would be intellectually dishonest to claim that it does. Therefore, my statement that x does not equal x has the same validity as your statement, and any disagreement on this point would be a violation of my Freedom of Speech.
I’m hoping that eventually Mary just winds up being that one mom everyone knew growing up who worked at Wal-Mart because her degree is the most useless piece of crap because she’s an ass.
That implies that she procreates. You want more of her genes running around? Granted, it could turn out fine, but is it worth the risk?
Nah, she *will* find a husband to procreate with, because her god so commands her.
An unfortunate reality of the situation, really.
a) Christians breed like rabbits, it’s, like, a commandment, or something.
b) Idiocracy had it right.
Good Little Irish Catholics grow up to make more Good Little Irish Catholics?
That implies that she procreates. You want more of her genes running around? Granted, it could turn out fine, but is it worth the risk?
I kind of feel like this is a surprisingly good roommate match, or at least not the worst. Mary likes to target people she thinks are weak or vulnerable, but I feel like Roz would push back on Mary’s bs, and they’d both more or less tire of arguing with each other after like a week or two. It weirdly balances out a little.
It’s still no fun to be the Roz of the equation (sadly know that one from experience). And if she’s anything like I was back then, I imagine she’s bailing out of far more arguments than she’s pursuing.
I can’t believe Mary…
That shirt violates their roommate agreement!
Even if it didn’t, Mary does not follow what it espouses very well. She is pretty damn self centered.
No, it does:
http://www.dumbingofage.com/2011/comic/book-1/05-media-rumble/dumb/
No referring to God as exclusively male.
As gentle as a vuvuzuela, maybe.
brilliant simile!
No Mary. Deep down Roz is a decent person while you have no redeeming qualities what so ever.
Deep down? I find her to be a nice person straight-up.
first I would buy a puppy, then I would give the puppy to Mary and waited tell she bonded with it, then I would give Carla a new pair of skates. In disguise I would later steal both items, while leaving a note for both of them, creating a series of challenges forcing them into some form of teeth clenched teamwork.
How could you be so evil and cruel.
That poor puppy.
Don’t worry, Some1 ain’t the type of person who harms puppies. Right, Some1?
I don’t harm puppies, nor can I ever see Mary harming a puppy, she’s evil but that’s a sin reserved for a special type of monster.
Don’t you dare hurt that puppy Some1!!! Don’t you dare hurt it!!!
Wait I’m confused, am I harming the puppy because I’m giving it to Mary or because of the whole dognapping thing? Cause I wouldn’t actually hurt the puppy, I’m not a monster.
The dognapping. As horrible as Mary is, I maintain a belief that relatively few people will hurt a puppy. Even someone as spiteful as Mary. Said belief might be unrealistic, but it’s one of the few things keeping me sane in this world, so I will stand by it.
She wouldn’t intentionally hurt the puppy. But she seems about as stupid as the person who starved a dog because they weren’t willing to believe that dogs are carnivores.
Then the best course of action is to raise the hypothetical puppy yourself, as giving a puppy to Mary may harm the puppy emotionally. Also, dorms are not known for their allowance of pets.
Perhaps a stuffed one, in a downwards pose? Could tell her it’s praying, and that’s how it sustains itself, so it needs neither food nor drink nor walks?
Funny enough the puppy thing was my least evil plan, my most evil planned involved kidnapping both Mary and Carla, tying up Carla and giving Mary a gun loaded with blanks. I would then say something to Mary like, “so if you really hate her that much, here’s your chance to be rid of her, or you could walk away and Carla would go free, make your choice Mary Bradford…show me what your are in the dark.”
Shouldn’t Mary like Robin, as the conservative candidate? Or have I got the politics of this strip all wrong?
That’s what I was wondering, too. Maybe she dislikes Robin as a person, or thinks she doesn’t truly believe and is just catering to votes?
This kind of thing does happen.
She has it in for the DeSantos. She thinks Riley’s a monster.
Now, whether she thinks that because of her roommate, or her roommate’s sister, or some unholy combination of the two, who knows.
It’s possible that Mary is from a branch of Christianity that regards all politics as worldly and all politicians as having turned away from God to pursue worldly power.
Also possible: Mary doesn’t like anyone. At all. Anywhere.
My theory is this is still the primaries, and they’re both the Republican candidate pandering for the conservative vote.
Or, it could be a case where, like NY and OK.
What do you call a NY Republican? A Democrat.
What do you call an OK Democrat? A Republican.
They don’t have primaries in congressional races. Robin is running for congress not the presidency.
You don’t? We do. Is your state a de-facto one-party state?
I don’t recall ever voting between multiple Republicans, (or “Republicans”), and multiple Democrats in a November election, for any seat.
Maybe my memory is just flawed, but a quick check of my states election board webpage suggests otherwise.
We have that. It’s a top-two primary so sometimes it’ll be D vs. D or R vs. R or very occasionally D vs. Lliberatarian or D vs. Green or Socialist. Where I’m from in Seattle it’s pretty hilarious – we have like three tiny socialist parties and one Maoist in the form of the Revolutionary Communist Party. They get three digits in votes sometimes!
That’s a general election. A primary election narrows the field of candidates (usually within political parties) before a general election. There still in September I think.
Incorrect. You may have districts where nobody is willing to challenge the incumbent but House and Senate races still have primaries.
I like this strip for humanizing Mary. Like, I dunno, this banter feels pretty natural to me. I will never like her as a person, but giving her some downtime from being the mean rotten bigot seems like a good change of pace.
…….
…. wait, this is her NOT being a mean rotten bigot?
I mean, yeah. Right now she’s just a terrible, arrogant jerk. She’s not behaving bigoted towards anyone this moment.
Strike that, people who have sex, derp.
That’s still pretty low on levels of awfulness compared to what Mary has done in the past. When she has no right to condemn her, at least the sex is an actual choice.
Specifically, people who masturbate.
So… nearly everyone?
Mary, this is something I wind up saying to a great many Christians.
Hubris does not become humility when you hide it behind God.
That’s a nice way of telling you to get over yourself.
Heh, I really enjoy their banter. These are two people with very little love for each other who nevertheless had decided to stay somewhat civil because they share a room.
I truly believe Mary tries to agree with Roz in the second panel, just in a very… Mary way.
It was a finely crafted snide remark in the fourth panel.
One of my favourite relationship (not necessarily romantic) dynamic tropes is “Two People Who Can’t Stand Each Other.”
I want to imagine this is Roz’s every morning. Waking up, trying to make some pleasant small talk with Mary, and then remembering why she never bothers.
Why Rep. Robin, I’m surprised, to see you here, your worship.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_NQ9ZRj_vtA&t=7m27s
DOA Mary is uglier and more vicious than Roomies Mary. She reminds me of a girl I met at my first cast party. Before, the play she bragged how she wasn’t like other cast members and couldn’t be corrupted. At the casting party she made out with a number of people men and women. I guess what I’m saying is: Mary seems like the kind of person who needs an invitation and she hasn’t gotten it yet. You have to be open to such things, too . Or maybe she keeps it on the DL like in Roomies?
…see, if it were coming from someone capable of humor or self-deprecation, Mary’s dialogue might be moderately finny banter. From her it’s just unironic awfulness.
Finny banter is for sharks only
Listen here, chum…
Don’t give them more puns, they’re just baiting you!
It was an honest typo, no need to take that tuna voice with me.
You guys fell for it hook, line and sinker
Heh, more like dank presense, amirite? … I should stop speaking. In general.
Oh god. And I misspelled. presence. All the more reason.
Mary makes me want to punch my computer screen. Props to David for inventing characters that illicit such powerful emotional reactions.
~rubs raw knuckles~ …but he still owes me a new computer screen.
How are you posting!?
My guess would be mobile device.
Does Nokia make smartphones?
*smartbricks
Nokia used to make good phones.
Didn’t M$ buy them?
Yes. His perfect reminder that bad things can happen to good people. And that those things are sometimes named Mary.
Mary is her reminder that everyone makes mistakes. Even God. After all, Mary exists.
Mary’s lines are pretty clever actually, too bad she’s such a dingus.
The worrying thing is that I really think that Mary believes that. This explains so much about her personality and behaviour. It also seriously opens the door to her having an undiagnosed narcissistic personality disorder.
Wait, what if she was diagnosed with something, but rather then get her proper therapy and care her parents had her try to use religion to solve her issues?
Not everything requires a mental-illness explanation. Some people are just metaphorical solid waste discharge ports.
Asshole-ism is actually significantly less likely in those who have mental illnesses, at least if you look at crime statistics. Those with mental illnesses are far less likely to commit crimes and far more likely to become the victims of them, especially violent crimes.
Honestly if I roomed with Mary, and then heard Joyce spout the things she usually says in gender studies/around Roz, I’d probably be harsh against Joyce too. Unfair I know! But like it’s easy to displace it.
good point – i never really juxtaposed those two things in my mind. makes a lot of sense. i like.
Yup, it doesn’t make it right, but it’s a big part of the reason she went off on Joyce that one time.
I wonder if it takes a lot of practice to be this awful. I mean, does Mary have to stand in front of the mirror every morning and practice being the most awful and evil version of herself she possibly can be, or does it just come naturally to her?
Oh please Mary, you’re about as gentle as that extra rough sandpaper one uses on sharp edges.
Mary is like a hole from which God’s Glory can escape. A Glory hole, if you will.
I doubt I’m the first to make this joke, but I’m not about to read all those comments.
And a proud Glory God hole she is.
I didn’t see one. Could have missed it.
“Perfect Glory’s gentle reminder”
… Of what NOT to be
Evidently, Mary is the kind of Christian who wants her glory on Earth.
Mary’s about as gentle as a rabid wolverine with crabs.
If I had to choose between a punch in the balls every morning, or having Mary as a roommate, I would still probably pick Mary, if only because it would be easier to preemptively kill her than it would be for a disembodied punching apparatus.
But by god, it would be close.
You could always wear a cup.
Mary just kind of makes me laugh at this point. She’s so friggin’ toothless it’d be like getting mad at the Brain for trying to take over the world.
Both of Mary’s evil plans have been foiled by pies to face and Ruth not caring enough to be blackmailed. Step up your game, Mary. You’re only running on 0.03 kilorosses at this point.
0.03 kiloross = 30 ross
I think you’re severely underestimating Ross.
Can someone so ignorant yet so simultaneously smug actually exist?
*glances at the current presidential election* Nevermind.
I am SeanR and I approve this message.
Oh, now Mary makes sense to me. She’s like that movement that wanted to make life on Earth so horrible and brutal people would go to Heaven faster and feel better once there. While Atheists work to create Heaven on Earth, Mary tries to be Hell to everyone around her.
Makes you pine for the days of self-flagellation and vows of silence, doesn’t she?
I don’t think any branch of Christianity does that. That’s just Mary.
Well, there is that “church” of “Baptists” in Kansas…
I asked myself how come both Mary and Roz are against Robin, but then I remembered that in Shortpacked! Robin was Catholic.
Mary’s against Robin because she’s against everybody. If the good lord Jesus Christ himself rose from the grave, she’d probably burn him as a witch.
Well, you know Historical Jesus was a character in Shortpacked, so it could happen. Not sure how, since DOA is supposed to be grounded in reality, but it could happen.
Perhaps an on-campus non-denominational priest? So not literal, but someone who expouses faith in a caring, non violent way?
If that shirt said “more me, less you” it’d more accurately reflect Mary’s attitude to others.
You can say that she’s full of herself.
Well, she’s definitely full of something…
Going by the Old Testament, Mary might actually qualify as what God considers a “gentle reminder”, and by “gentle”, I of course mean that nobody dies.
Eh, I ship it.
Mary is still one of the absolute worst but this is a pretty good snark.
The thing is, she has a point in panel 4.
Huh. I’m actually kinda surprised that Mary *isn’t* a fan of Robin.
Given her presumed political standpoints and all.
Unless she was talking about Riley. Which was my first thought, but didn’t seem to fit.
Well, a real, honest-to-Rush-Limbaugh Christian would never approve of a woman in public office. 1 Timothy 2:12 and all that.
Yeah, no true Scotsman would ever do such a thing.
ugh, next time instead of a pie to the face she needs a brick to the face.
The only time I will defend Mary is panel 2. I thought that’s where Roz was going with what she said in panel 1.
Yeah, Mary, your totally like God’s right hand.
You know, like Lucifer before he resigned.
I would like to learn the nature of Roz’s influence over her sister’s congressional aide.
Even when Mary isn’t wearing the wrist warmers we can’t see her wrists.
Perhaps Willis drawing her wrists are like feet for Liefeld? Or there’s a darker plot point there.
I feel like I’d tolerate Mary a lot more if her last line in this was meant to be sarcastic. I mean, I’d also have to ignore everything else she has ever done ever, but still.
less Mary, more historical Jesus.
Historical Jesus would be perfect for a crazy homeless guy living around campus. He’d be all like “I am Jesus, your savoir! Someone bring me a fish and I’ll clone it for you.”
If he’s cloning fish, he’s more likely a graduate student in genetics. It’s sometimes easy to confuse graduate students for crazy homeless guys, though.
Hey walky, are you sure you can’t violate your “nobody dies in DoA” rule for just this one character? Please?
Mary doesn’t even have to die! She just has to stay hidden, even from her roommate. I…I really thought after Carla’s brilliant humiliation of her, that’s what should happen, for a few months at least.
A few in universe months, correct?
Geez. I’m not a huge fan of Roz, but I wouldn’t wish living with Mary on my worst enemy.
You must have fairly nice worst enemies, the one guy who I know personally who could be considered my worst enemy is so much worse. Think, Sexist Blaine like asshole who harassed high school girls and resigned after it turned out he was cheating just so so much.
Mary is a reminder that religious extremism comes in all forms.
And, like kebab, it should be removed.
Like kebab?
I’d also like to know how does your simile work. It should be sheared with a slicer thingie?
Oh my god, that t-shirt is horrible. Perfect match for Mary.
Mary needs more ultra pies.
Willis- please run over Mary
Or drive her around the bend.
Dear Willis.
I know that you have promised never to kill anyone in DoA, due to the negative emotional impact that would cause.
Let me promise you that Mary’s death would not have this consequence. If she got hit by a truck we’d be less grieving and more dancing.
Just putting that out there.
I’ve been staring at this strip for 10minutes now, trying to figure out why I love it so much, and I finally got it: it perfectly exemplifies the importance of context!
If this is your first run-in with Mary, then her last line, hells, even her EXPRESSION, comes out as snarky. It’s only for more familiar people that it becomes “uh, no. Pick up a dictionary.”
CONTEXT!!!!
I have a feeling the comment section would have spawned far less vitriol if this was her first appearance.
Apparently we need more pies
I keep forgetting just how despicable Mary is.
Which is hilarious in hindsight, because she was originally designed as a perfect girl, like twenty years ago.
this is where you drop kick her. you have the high ground. (physically and morally.)
Mary is rude and unpleasant, but panel 2 is pretty funny, whether she genuinely dislikes Robin or is simply snarking in response to panel 1. It also seems a bit nerdy… which isn’t surprising given that Mary’s here for anime-style art lessons.
I
I ship it
They’d make a pretty good thwartship, I gotta agree.
Yay Roz! I am excited for this storyline.
… Oh I do believe I would have murdered Mary a long time ago. Not because she’s religious, but because she’s so conceited that she believes herself to be an exemplary member of her chosen “tribe,” for lack of a better term.
I would do worse than spell my name out in laser light. I would be constantly preaching the language of science to her… Like an evangelical Dina.
The power of evolution compells you! Go and learn some more! Something something square of the hypotenuse… something something… light?
Yeah, monotheism is not my subject.
The name Mary means Sea of Bitterness. It’s so very fitting.
So, I’m really interested in Joyce’s fathers future character development. I think it’s going to say a lot about Willis’ view of religious/conservative people. I wonder if he will be able to be portrayed as both religious/conservative and reasonable. I think all other characters have been portrayed as one or the other.
I also wonder if Joyce, as a reasonable but misguided character will be become an atheist at the end of her character arc or if she will find some sort of middle ground. Basically I’m hoping that Joyce, her brother and her father, break the trend of this dichotomy between religion and reason.
Joyce is, to a certain extent, autobiographical – I *think* Willis is an atheist (but Jesus was an okay guy), so that’s likely where Joyce will end up. I s’pose Hank will end up wherever Willis’s father wound up?
Also, counterpoint: you can either be a religious conservative or reasonable – there is no overlap. If you mean either religious or conservative, and reasonable, there’s plenty of characters that fit the bill. The only atheists around seem to be Dorothy and Dina.
Oh the irony of that shirt. If Mary was any more about “ME” she would produce a gravitational field
I am just counting down the days until the reason for Marys obnoxious behavior is revealed, showing her to be a flawed human coping with some form of heavy duty problems, making me feel like an ass for hating her right now.
And then there’s Mike, or Galaso. Some characters don’t need reasons.
There’s something wrong with Galasso? I mean, there is, but I think it’s congenital, not a state of maliciousness.
Hard to hate someone for being so gender blind he’s suffering a social handicap.
Now, how he survived high school with that ego, I’ll never understand.
Presumably, by actually being as smart and ridiculously over the top awesome as he claims to be.
They will also be shown as just normal, flawed human beings, mark my words.
Y’know, it’s funny. I’ve been reading this strip since it began (and I read all of Roomies and Shortpacked before this), but it’s only occurred to me just now that Mary has to truly believe that everyone sees the world as she does.
…it is one friggity weird thing to realize
Oh man, Mary is so fucking horrible.
Those were actually pretty witty comebacks.