Dumbing of Age Book Twelve

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May 8, 2026

Legitimate

by David M Willis on May 10, 2011 at 12:01 am
  • 05 - Media Rumble
└ Tags: daisy, dorothy

Discussion (118) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. G.S.Mercs
    G.S.Mercs
    May 10, 2011 at 12:01 am | #

    Well you see, when one pair of scissors loves another pair of scissors…

    • Dr. Alex Horrible
      Dr. Alex Horrible
      May 10, 2011 at 2:21 am | #

      You get sharper scissors, and a more effective cut through paper, or what-have-you.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      May 10, 2011 at 5:56 pm | #

      They rub over each others blades, causing random chip marks to appear, thus damaging them both, resulting in throwiung away said scissors.

      Love Is Cruel Sometimes.

  2. Dedlok
    Dedlok
    May 10, 2011 at 12:03 am | #

    HA! Scissoring. I love it.

  3. Ragnal
    Ragnal
    May 10, 2011 at 12:04 am | #

    HA HA. Visual pun.

    • Vert
      Vert
      May 10, 2011 at 10:07 am | #

      That better have been in Phil Ken Sebbin/Steven Colbert’s voice, because that’s certainly how I read it.

  4. addude
    addude
    May 10, 2011 at 12:04 am | #

    What’s Dorothy’s major in this universe?

    • George
      George
      May 10, 2011 at 12:09 am | #

      Lesbians?

      • Doctor_Who
        Doctor_Who
        May 10, 2011 at 12:15 am | #

        My university didn’t offer that. 🙁

        • skies
          skies
          May 10, 2011 at 12:28 am | #

          Mine did. It was called Gender Studies :B

          • Broughtlight
            Broughtlight
            May 10, 2011 at 12:58 am | #

            Beat it. Feminism, Gender, and Sexuality Studies.

            • Dr. Alex Horrible
              Dr. Alex Horrible
              May 10, 2011 at 2:20 am | #

              Sororities.

              • tahrey
                tahrey
                May 10, 2011 at 8:09 am | #

                UNFILTERED INTERNET! Ultimate trump!

                …oh, er… um… hi there?

                • tahrey
                  tahrey
                  May 10, 2011 at 8:12 am | #

                  Wow, Joyce, really? That’s possibly the least appropriate of all possible random avatars the system could have given me. Apart from maybe some alternate universe black cyclops version.

                • Dr. Alex Horrible
                  Dr. Alex Horrible
                  May 10, 2011 at 11:43 am | #

                  That’s not the real Joyce!

                • Rowen Morland
                  Rowen Morland
                  May 10, 2011 at 11:58 am | #

                  Anti-Joyce!

                • Zippy
                  Zippy
                  May 10, 2011 at 6:07 pm | #

                  What?

                • Plasma Mongoose
                  Plasma Mongoose
                  May 10, 2011 at 11:33 pm | #

                  @Zippy: Who is that supposed to be in your grava? Joyci La Forge?

  5. Gnoka
    Gnoka
    May 10, 2011 at 12:05 am | #

    It’s not like you haven’t been dropping hints left and right Daisy.

  6. JK9000
    JK9000
    May 10, 2011 at 12:06 am | #

    I’m not an expert, but I don’t think that’s how scissoring works.

  7. Darth Shadow
    Darth Shadow
    May 10, 2011 at 12:07 am | #

    I lost it at the scissors. Good show, Walky.

  8. Cholma
    Cholma
    May 10, 2011 at 12:09 am | #

    Daisy’s a Scissor Sister? ;p

    • Brendan
      Brendan
      May 11, 2011 at 6:17 pm | #

      Invisible light! Ah-ah!

  9. Wackd
    Wackd
    May 10, 2011 at 12:09 am | #

    Wow.

    A lesbian version of J. Jonah Jameson. Well, Jameson in reverse, I guess. Maybe. On the one hand–completely disregarding superhero news. On the other hand, just printing what sells.

    A zig-zagging lesbian J. Jonah Jameson.

    Still awesome.

    • milk experiment
      milk experiment
      May 10, 2011 at 12:23 am | #

      Thanks to you, I now hear J.K. Simmons’s voice for all of Daisy’s speech balloons. 😛

      • Jules
        Jules
        May 10, 2011 at 1:45 pm | #

        “I need a girlfriend, and combustible lemons.”

        • murrkitteh
          murrkitteh
          May 10, 2011 at 5:47 pm | #

          Ten Internets i have bestowed upon you, and your mother with my penis.

      • daughterofthestars
        daughterofthestars
        May 11, 2011 at 9:58 am | #

        Simmons is cast to play the main character’s teacher in “Avatar: The Legend of Korra” which is an animated show. I’m pretty excited about this.

    • Thomas
      Thomas
      May 10, 2011 at 7:05 am | #

      She’ll never guess that Dorothy is actually Amazi-Girl! 😛

      • Zem
        Zem
        May 10, 2011 at 12:55 pm | #

        Oh my god I haven’t even thought of that. Of course she’d be wanting that job. And that’s why she is so successful at it. And they have the same head shape. And no-one has yet seen them together.

        • Zem
          Zem
          May 10, 2011 at 12:58 pm | #

          Talking of which. Could Dorothy and Amber be the same person?

          Consider the only panel where they are seen together.
          http://www.dumbingofage.com/2011/comic/book-1/04-the-bechdel-test/swap/

          Mark the use of the words “companion” and “swap”. Obviously Dorothy is Amber’s Tyleresque alter-ego. At some point during the next chapter she’ll be found trying to take a picture of Amazi-girl while wearing the costume herself.

          It’s gonna be amazingly tragic.

      • calendarman27
        calendarman27
        May 10, 2011 at 1:58 pm | #

        “that amazigirl is a menace, now get me some photos of her! and if possible make them involve scissoring in some fashion!”

    • Undrave
      Undrave
      May 10, 2011 at 1:50 pm | #

      I think it could get screwier, she could become a composite of Lois Lane and JJ!

      “Get me pictures of Amazi-Girl! Hot sweaty pictures with battle damaged costume!”

    • taekwondogirl
      taekwondogirl
      May 10, 2011 at 3:07 pm | #

      Except JJJ seems almost asexual and is more concerned with a scoop on a masked vigilante. So they’re kind of opposites. :p

  10. Kittfox
    Kittfox
    May 10, 2011 at 12:09 am | #

    Ah that last panel just makes it <3

  11. arjay2813
    arjay2813
    May 10, 2011 at 12:13 am | #

    super hard to figure out the punchline for this one

    • milk experiment
      milk experiment
      May 10, 2011 at 12:24 am | #

      Something to do with arts and crafts, maybe? Yeah, that’s probably it.

      • Dr. Alex Horrible
        Dr. Alex Horrible
        May 10, 2011 at 2:18 am | #

        Totally.

    • Dave
      Dave
      May 10, 2011 at 11:26 am | #

      Scissoring is a slang term for a particular form of lesbian sexual activity.

      • Dr. Alex Horrible
        Dr. Alex Horrible
        May 10, 2011 at 11:45 am | #

        Lies. It’s definitely macaroni sculptures.

  12. A. Colunga
    A. Colunga
    May 10, 2011 at 12:15 am | #

    Paper lets Rock watch for $15 through a hole in the wall.

    • The Sound Defense
      The Sound Defense
      May 10, 2011 at 12:47 am | #

      This comment gets a thumbs-up.

      (b’_’)b

      • BMeph
        BMeph
        May 10, 2011 at 11:36 pm | #

        And for a nickel, your mom gets a thumb up.

        (…the thumb is my penis.)

  13. ZARDIS
    ZARDIS
    May 10, 2011 at 12:17 am | #

    well played, willis

  14. Cyth
    Cyth
    May 10, 2011 at 12:17 am | #

    Oh Dorothy, I can sadly sympathize with you as of late.

  15. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    May 10, 2011 at 12:18 am | #

    I hope she doesn’t start running around with those things… someone can lose an eye.

    • Dr. Alex Horrible
      Dr. Alex Horrible
      May 10, 2011 at 2:18 am | #

      faaaace? x_0

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        May 10, 2011 at 2:58 am | #

        Exactly!

        • CWR
          CWR
          May 10, 2011 at 5:59 am | #

          Ask yourself where was the last place you saw the eye – try to retrace your steps. I find it helps to put frequently lost items in the same place every day.

          • Dr. Alex Horrible
            Dr. Alex Horrible
            May 10, 2011 at 11:47 am | #

            Yeah, faaaces should be kept in one place, which should form a habit, and help you remember where you left it.

  16. The Portmanterrific Frogboy
    The Portmanterrific Frogboy
    May 10, 2011 at 12:19 am | #

    Now, if she was a vigilesbian, then Daisy might be interested.

    • lord of dance
      lord of dance
      May 10, 2011 at 1:00 am | #

      vigilesbian- one who performs unauthorized and illegal lesbian acts on alleged homophobes.

  17. Janette
    Janette
    May 10, 2011 at 12:19 am | #

    Last panel is the best thing I’ve seen lately.

    • CWR
      CWR
      May 10, 2011 at 6:01 am | #

      Facetious remark about the internet.

  18. Shift
    Shift
    May 10, 2011 at 12:25 am | #

    So rather than put effort into investigating a rumor that has been confirmed and seen by multiple sources, she instead is only interested in a sex video. Where did Daisy learn journalism from? TMZ or the National Enquirer?

    It’s not exactly hearsay if you have an entire floor of girls who can corroborate a sighting of Amazi-Girl, and considering the surplus of smart phones, probably got video-phone evidence of Billie being saved.

    And an because I need to get it out of my system…

    Mrs. Garrison: Oh scissor me Alison! Scissor me!

    • XLR
      XLR
      May 10, 2011 at 5:08 am | #

      I NEARLY PURGED THE MR. GARRISON THING FROM MY MIND.

      almost. It was nearly gone. and you brought it back.

      DANM YOU WILLIS!

      …oh wait….

      DANM YOU SHIFT!

      • Chester Sellars
        Chester Sellars
        May 10, 2011 at 7:13 am | #

        SCISSOR ME TIMBERS

        • meanderling
          meanderling
          May 10, 2011 at 10:00 pm | #

          +1 internets!

    • Makkabee
      Makkabee
      May 10, 2011 at 9:26 am | #

      “Where did Daisy learn journalism from?”

      Hustler.

      • Lesharo
        Lesharo
        May 16, 2011 at 10:42 pm | #

        “Dear ‘Penthouse’ Forum…”

  19. Matt of Steel
    Matt of Steel
    May 10, 2011 at 12:29 am | #

    So … when playing Rock, Paper, Scissors …. and both people throw scissors … hmmm.

    Unless she just has a metal on metal fetish.

  20. Whowhatnow
    Whowhatnow
    May 10, 2011 at 12:46 am | #

    So, do you guys think Daisy’s gonna be straight in this universe?

    • shoeboxjeddy
      shoeboxjeddy
      May 10, 2011 at 12:56 am | #

      As straight as Ethan. And Ultracar.

      • kagato23
        kagato23
        May 10, 2011 at 3:05 am | #

        What is this bs? Again guys?

        Look. Dorothy is obviously gay. Anybody can see that.

        Now Ethan is obviously straight. At least we can assume so until the author says otherwise.

        • Dr. Alex Horrible
          Dr. Alex Horrible
          May 10, 2011 at 11:49 am | #

          You’re not well-read on the continuity of the Walkyverse are you?

        • Windy
          Windy
          May 10, 2011 at 12:48 pm | #

          The amount of sarcasm and counter-sarcasm here is burning my mind! Just to be on the safe side: The author already said Ethan was gay. Now if you’ll excuse me I need some burn cream.

          • Haituri
            Haituri
            May 10, 2011 at 7:09 pm | #

            As an aside, have you ever heard the 60s(?) song “Windy”? It’s pretty hilarious:

            “Who’s bending down to give me a rainbow?
            Everyone knows it’s WINDY!”

          • BMeph
            BMeph
            May 10, 2011 at 11:40 pm | #

            For a nickle, I’ll give you some “burn cream.”

            …on your FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACE!

  21. goatman95111
    goatman95111
    May 10, 2011 at 12:54 am | #

    Aww… Daisy is just denying her superheroine fetish, especially if Amzi-Girl’s costume is based on Batman & Robin.

    • Lesharo
      Lesharo
      May 16, 2011 at 10:44 pm | #

      I think we would have noticed by now if it was…

  22. DrDVD
    DrDVD
    May 10, 2011 at 1:12 am | #

    they should practice safe scissoring, with safety scissors 😀

    • Romanticide
      Romanticide
      May 10, 2011 at 1:14 am | #

      This 😀

    • Dark_T_Zeratul
      Dark_T_Zeratul
      May 10, 2011 at 1:55 am | #

      That is so much more hilarious with the Amazigirl avatar.

  23. Voodoo_curse
    Voodoo_curse
    May 10, 2011 at 1:18 am | #

    Wait, the blonde is gay? that’s Ethan, right?

    • Danielle
      Danielle
      May 10, 2011 at 9:56 am | #

      No thats Daniel I think . Ethan has dark hair

      • Dr. Alex Horrible
        Dr. Alex Horrible
        May 10, 2011 at 11:50 am | #

        Mike is the blond. Your avatar, Voodoo, is Ethan. Danny has brown hair.

        • taekwondogirl
          taekwondogirl
          May 10, 2011 at 10:16 pm | #

          The only thing you’re horrible at is picking up sarcasm.

          • Voodoo_curse
            Voodoo_curse
            May 11, 2011 at 12:11 am | #

            I picked up your moms femurs for a nickel with my penis in her faaaaaaaceee. DYW!

            • taekwondogirl
              taekwondogirl
              May 11, 2011 at 2:02 pm | #

              So what you’re saying is my mom boned you and you paid her for it.

    • Zem
      Zem
      May 10, 2011 at 12:46 pm | #

      We should switch to the “only Ethan is gay” jokes now.

      Willis said so in the News! It is Ethan who is gay, not Daisy!

  24. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    May 10, 2011 at 1:32 am | #

    Daisy is in desperate need of a good lay; my question is; Will Amber find herself waking up with Daist in her bed?

    • Bekah
      Bekah
      May 10, 2011 at 5:58 am | #

      That would be awesome.

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        May 10, 2011 at 10:27 am | #

        I noticed a recurring theme in SP! where Amber either getting kissed by another girl or waking up with a girl in bed with her and I figured that the same is likely to happen in DoA as well.

    • Haituri
      Haituri
      May 10, 2011 at 7:12 pm | #

      I think perhaps… naaah, I won’t say, ’cause if it does happen it’d be such a spoiler

  25. Lamer Namer
    Lamer Namer
    May 10, 2011 at 1:39 am | #

    She needs to be careful with those scissors or she’ll get a cut.

    On her FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACE

    • Dr. Alex Horrible
      Dr. Alex Horrible
      May 10, 2011 at 2:17 am | #

      Medical bills cost more than a nickel. Though cuts to the face aren’t as expensive as broken femurs.

    • Jackson
      Jackson
      May 10, 2011 at 7:00 am | #

      It was only a matter of time. I knew it.

  26. L-
    L-
    May 10, 2011 at 1:52 am | #

    Does Malaya exist in this universe, I wonder?

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      May 10, 2011 at 3:01 am | #

      If she exists then Blanka Ken should exist too.

      • Tanner Kay
        Tanner Kay
        May 10, 2011 at 12:39 pm | #

        You mean Rufus?

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          May 10, 2011 at 6:02 pm | #

          Of cause I meant Guile, who else would I be talking about.

  27. Dahlia
    Dahlia
    May 10, 2011 at 2:08 am | #

    O.e;;;;;;; *backs away slowly….very slowly*

  28. quietdevious1
    quietdevious1
    May 10, 2011 at 3:40 am | #

    *tsk* Gonna have dull scissors if you keep doing that…

  29. CWR
    CWR
    May 10, 2011 at 6:04 am | #

    The death panels, silly.

    • CWR
      CWR
      May 11, 2011 at 6:26 am | #

      This was a reply to something that is now…gone. Lord I look a fool.

  30. Jackson
    Jackson
    May 10, 2011 at 7:01 am | #

    Norstein Bekkler says: “Is it THAT obvious?”

  31. ziggy78eog
    ziggy78eog
    May 10, 2011 at 9:05 am | #

    Just a lucky guess, I swear!

  32. sarpiedon
    sarpiedon
    May 10, 2011 at 9:12 am | #

    so how many lesbians does it take to make a web comic?

    • Zem
      Zem
      May 10, 2011 at 12:44 pm | #

      All of them?

    • L-
      L-
      May 10, 2011 at 4:10 pm | #

      The more the better, obviously. 😛

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      May 10, 2011 at 6:04 pm | #

      As many as it takes to screw in a lightbulb.

      • boogily
        boogily
        May 10, 2011 at 6:26 pm | #

        “How many lesbians does it take to screw in a lightbul–” “THAT’S NOT FUNNY!”

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          May 10, 2011 at 7:50 pm | #

          Your Grav’s angry face makes your comment that much funnier.

  33. Joebo
    Joebo
    May 10, 2011 at 9:35 am | #

    That was dirty!

    • Dr. Alex Horrible
      Dr. Alex Horrible
      May 10, 2011 at 11:52 am | #

      Your avatar is so amazing with that line.

  34. Zem
    Zem
    May 10, 2011 at 12:50 pm | #

    What? She admits it?

    I was going to make fun of it for another 10-12 pages! That’s…cheating!

    :p

  35. Loki
    Loki
    May 10, 2011 at 1:14 pm | #

    I’m guessing the shipping between these two went on an uptick today.

  36. Roborat
    Roborat
    May 10, 2011 at 3:03 pm | #

    Loved that last panel. Even a pair of left handed scissors, nice touch.

  37. Kelsey
    Kelsey
    May 10, 2011 at 3:13 pm | #

    SHE WAS BEING SO SUBTLE ABOUT IT, TOO!

    • Engelfire
      Engelfire
      May 20, 2011 at 7:05 am | #

      I know, right?

  38. Sporkaganza
    Sporkaganza
    May 10, 2011 at 7:17 pm | #

    The last panel is basically the best thing ever.

  39. nothri
    nothri
    May 10, 2011 at 7:40 pm | #

    Ahh, yes, scissoring. For those occasions when fixing things with your penis won’t work for obvious reasons, and you don’t want to use your FAAAAACE.

  40. Orbit the World
    Orbit the World
    May 11, 2011 at 8:23 pm | #

    Daisy and Robin sitting in a bush….

    *Insert end of joke containing words ‘mom’ and ‘nickel’ here*

  41. rabidfaneater
    rabidfaneater
    May 11, 2011 at 8:25 pm | #

    the last panel is amazing

  42. bee menardi
    bee menardi
    October 22, 2011 at 3:19 am | #

    lesbians don’t “scissor,” just so you know.

    • Ry
      Ry
      February 14, 2013 at 9:23 am | #

      Indeed. The correct term for it is actually called “tribadism”. Everyone should be more familiar with the correct terminology for their preferred sex acts. That they perform. Frequently.

      When will people learn?

  43. Jenny Creed
    Jenny Creed
    June 3, 2013 at 12:24 pm | #

    Thompson’s scissors: The only scissors strong enough to cut other scissors!

  44. DarkoNeko
    DarkoNeko
    April 13, 2015 at 5:14 am | #

    Just a hunch

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