Dumbing of Age Book Twelve

Dumbing of Age

A college webcomic by David Willis
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July 11, 2026

Frequency

by David M Willis on August 23, 2011 at 12:01 am
  • 06 - Yesterday Was Thursday
└ Tags: dorothy, joe, joyce, walky

Discussion (179) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. Jen Aside
    Jen Aside
    August 23, 2011 at 12:02 am | #

    Oh, what could have been…

    (Actually, it couldn’t have been Joyce, could it? ’cause, why report on just plain ol’ PMHP between unknowns?)

    • David Herbert
      David Herbert
      August 23, 2011 at 2:21 am | #

      She’d probably throw up after the first sip.

      • Troperop
        Troperop
        August 23, 2011 at 3:50 am | #

        Except for the whole bit where Joyce is really good at holding her alcohol.

    • themanwithnoname
      themanwithnoname
      April 15, 2015 at 12:32 pm | #

      Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are these, ‘It might have been.

  2. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    August 23, 2011 at 12:02 am | #

    Walky = Virgin

    • Shifty
      Shifty
      August 23, 2011 at 12:12 am | #

      You’re not surprised are you? After all, with the exception of Dorothy, he’s still kinda stuck in the whole “Girls are yucky” mentality.

      • iSaidCandleja-
        iSaidCandleja-
        August 23, 2011 at 12:16 am | #

        That doesn’t mean “boys are yuck” does it?

        • Kaci
          Kaci
          August 23, 2011 at 12:19 am | #

          I give you +5 internet points for that awesome comment

          • turkishproverb
            turkishproverb
            August 23, 2011 at 1:41 am | #

            And a +5 from the slashfans.

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          August 23, 2011 at 12:23 am | #

          And another +5 points for Gryffindor. 😀

          • TsunamiJane
            TsunamiJane
            August 23, 2011 at 8:45 am | #

            TWO HUNDRED POINTS FOR HOUSE SLYTHERIN!

            …yay, Snape is the best….

            • Shade
              Shade
              August 23, 2011 at 5:02 pm | #

              …Snape wins the Quidditch… yay

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        August 23, 2011 at 12:21 am | #

        Not as such, but most people avoid blurting out that fact in public.

  3. Punchinello Van Vandervan
    Punchinello Van Vandervan
    August 23, 2011 at 12:02 am | #

    “Drunk and Insane”?
    Sounds like the recipe for true love to me!
    And this being an “alternate universe” and all,
    it could TOTALLY happen!

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      August 23, 2011 at 12:08 am | #

      Less of a true love recipe and more of next websex ratings winner.

      • Aizat
        Aizat
        August 23, 2011 at 12:17 am | #

        More like a sob story waiting to happen.

    • Jess
      Jess
      November 23, 2014 at 1:25 am | #

      I ship it with no issues. lol.
      They’d have issues, but with how different they are if they found the middle ground on things, they’d almost be a normal person.

  4. Mkvenner
    Mkvenner
    August 23, 2011 at 12:03 am | #

    Dead Man walking on the Green Mile!

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      August 23, 2011 at 12:06 am | #

      Dead man? Noooo. Crushed nuts? Very possibly.

      • Mkvenner
        Mkvenner
        August 23, 2011 at 12:09 am | #

        That is the same thing.

        • Zuche
          Zuche
          August 23, 2011 at 12:12 am | #

          No, but I recall wishing it was.

          • iSaidCandleja-
            iSaidCandleja-
            August 23, 2011 at 12:17 am | #

            I’m sorry you had to feel that. The crushed nuts I mean.

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          August 23, 2011 at 12:15 am | #

          If being a eunuch = dmight as well be dead from Joe POV, then you might be right.

      • Aizat
        Aizat
        August 23, 2011 at 12:12 am | #

        Shattered Dreams more like it.

        • Aizat
          Aizat
          August 23, 2011 at 12:22 am | #

          For those of you that does know what I meant, Shattered Dreams is when someone kicks another person in the balls.

          • Plasma Mongoose
            Plasma Mongoose
            August 23, 2011 at 12:25 am | #

            NO, I cannot say I ever heard Shattered Dreams as a euphemism for crushed nuts before.

            • Teddy
              Teddy
              August 23, 2011 at 12:45 am | #

              It’s a WWE term.

              • ALostProphet
                ALostProphet
                August 23, 2011 at 12:12 pm | #

                Eh, I prefer Cody. He’s got a better gimmick 🙂

                • SolegitRR
                  SolegitRR
                  August 23, 2011 at 12:54 pm | #

                  Is that some Street Fighter in my DOA?

  5. Sentient
    Sentient
    August 23, 2011 at 12:03 am | #

    I do so enjoy Walky’s looks of realization.

  6. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    August 23, 2011 at 12:03 am | #

    They way Joyce was blushing in the 3rd panel, you be thinking that maybe she is lying.

    • Kaci
      Kaci
      August 23, 2011 at 12:05 am | #

      she’s embarrassed about imaging, even for a brief second, the even thought of two people in mid, non-marital coitus.

      • Mkvenner
        Mkvenner
        August 23, 2011 at 12:08 am | #

        😀 🙂 😀 🙂 😀 🙂 😀 🙂 😀

        I think she was invisioning a bisexual orgy.

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          August 23, 2011 at 12:09 am | #

          With Sal on her bike. 😀

          • Mkvenner
            Mkvenner
            August 23, 2011 at 12:22 am | #

            And with Mike, Amber, Dina, Walky, Joe, Danny, Mary, Dorothy, Roz, Daisy, Billie, Ruth, Sarah, Marcie, pretty much the entire cast.

            • Aizat
              Aizat
              August 23, 2011 at 12:23 am | #

              GAHHHH!!!! Sexual image overload!!

              • Mkvenner
                Mkvenner
                August 23, 2011 at 12:27 am | #

                I forgot to mention that it is all at the same time.

            • Plasma Mongoose
              Plasma Mongoose
              August 23, 2011 at 12:26 am | #

              All on bikes! 😀

              • Mkvenner
                Mkvenner
                August 23, 2011 at 12:29 am | #

                Sorry, but due to economic terrorist holding the government hostage we could only afford one bike. -The Management

                • Aizat
                  Aizat
                  August 23, 2011 at 1:44 am | #

                  Instead we will place them all on bicycles.

                • N0083rP00F
                  N0083rP00F
                  August 23, 2011 at 12:52 pm | #

                  Due to budget constraints the bicycles are limited to only one wheel, no fenders or seats … baskets are right out.

                • Plasma Mongoose
                  Plasma Mongoose
                  August 23, 2011 at 9:51 pm | #

                  Basket cases on the other hand, are right in. 😀

          • Arkadi
            Arkadi
            August 23, 2011 at 8:34 am | #

            With herself and Sal on Sal’s bike, you mean?

            • Mkvenner
              Mkvenner
              August 23, 2011 at 12:26 pm | #

              No I meant with herself and pretty much the entire cast not just with Sal.

              • Mkvenner
                Mkvenner
                August 23, 2011 at 12:27 pm | #

                Minus Ethan.

                • Heavensrun
                  Heavensrun
                  August 23, 2011 at 6:31 pm | #

                  Why minus Ethan, tho? It’s Joyce’s fantasy you’re interjecting here, and she doesn’t know he’s gay.

          • Mally
            Mally
            July 22, 2015 at 3:06 am | #

            More likely just

            • Mally
              Mally
              July 22, 2015 at 3:07 am | #

              More likely just

              • Mally
                Mally
                July 22, 2015 at 3:09 am | #

                Wow, apparently I just cannot into code at 3am. http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/CargoShip

                Joyce/Sal’s Bike OTP

        • Heavensrun
          Heavensrun
          August 23, 2011 at 6:30 pm | #

          Your gravatar makes your clearly overzealous libido ooze with hilarity.

          Wait…

          THAT’S NOT HILARITY! THAT’S NOT HILARITY AT ALL! (washes hands)

      • Joebo
        Joebo
        August 23, 2011 at 12:08 am | #

        You know, “coitus” may in fact be my favorite word for sex ever.

        • Kaci
          Kaci
          August 23, 2011 at 12:11 am | #

          It reminds me of “clit”, something that comes in handy in “coitus”

          • iSaidCandleja-
            iSaidCandleja-
            August 23, 2011 at 12:15 am | #

            You have to be pretty handy already to fully utilize it though.

            • Blob Marley
              Blob Marley
              August 23, 2011 at 11:25 am | #

              What you did there.
              .
              .
              .
              .
              .
              I see it.

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          August 23, 2011 at 12:16 am | #

          Coitus sounds a lot like the name Curtis.

          • Kaci
            Kaci
            August 23, 2011 at 12:20 am | #

            there’s a parents are mean joke in there somewhere

          • Aizat
            Aizat
            August 23, 2011 at 12:21 am | #

            I heard that, Curtis.

            • PandoraMN
              PandoraMN
              August 24, 2011 at 3:42 am | #

              PHANTASMAGORIA A PUZZEL OF IDENTICAL HALLWAYS!

      • Aizat
        Aizat
        August 23, 2011 at 12:19 am | #

        You mean “PREMARITAL HANKY PANKY”, right?

        • Mkvenner
          Mkvenner
          August 23, 2011 at 12:32 am | #

          I’ve heard it both ways.

      • QueenThomas
        QueenThomas
        August 23, 2011 at 9:13 am | #

        I like the implication in this comment that she doesn’t mind imagining two people in mid, post-marital coitus.

    • Digidestined of Trust (Tim)
      Digidestined of Trust (Tim)
      August 23, 2011 at 12:07 am | #

      She’s not. I get that look all the time when I’ve found out something embarrassing even though I haven’t seen what’s happened or were there and it’s just really really bad that you can’t help but look like that.

      • Kaci
        Kaci
        August 23, 2011 at 12:10 am | #

        its a reply to both of you, but what we need here is a mind camera, to see the truth. And photo it.

        • das-g
          das-g
          August 23, 2011 at 8:51 pm | #

          So it has come to this. “Pics or it didn’t happen” is being applied to even thoughts, now.

    • MM
      MM
      August 23, 2011 at 12:38 am | #

      Maybe she’s shocked Joe didn’t crumble under her righteous fury and beg for salvation.

    • Drew
      Drew
      August 24, 2011 at 8:16 pm | #

      Last panel Joyce mad face = win

      • Bill M.
        Bill M.
        August 26, 2011 at 2:37 pm | #

        That expression is one wrong word away from a complete and utter freak out.

  7. Mkvenner
    Mkvenner
    August 23, 2011 at 12:04 am | #

    What did Kansas say?

    • MelvinTheBold
      MelvinTheBold
      August 23, 2011 at 12:22 am | #

      Kansas reportedly stated that, “All we are is dust in the wind.” Their spokesperson further requested that their “wayward son” be sure to “carry on.”

      • Mkvenner
        Mkvenner
        August 23, 2011 at 12:59 am | #

        I was talking about Dorothy.

        • Izzy
          Izzy
          August 23, 2011 at 5:06 am | #

          you may have been talking about dorothy, but melvin’s response was so cash….that’s a term the youngsters use as a synonym for cool nowadays, right? cash?

        • CWR
          CWR
          August 23, 2011 at 6:08 am | #

          I thought you were talking about Clark Kent.

          Joe has a shirt that may say “Clark” and looks sorta like Superman.

          This means…um…Joe is Amazi-girl?

          • Mkvenner
            Mkvenner
            August 23, 2011 at 12:24 pm | #

            Clark Kent is From Krypton no Kansas, Dorothy Gale from the Wizard of OZ is.

            • N0083rP00F
              N0083rP00F
              August 23, 2011 at 12:56 pm | #

              But he was raised as a Kent in Smallville, Kansas….

              • Caelan
                Caelan
                August 23, 2011 at 4:05 pm | #

                Completely off topic, I know — where’s that gravatar from?

                • Mkvenner
                  Mkvenner
                  August 23, 2011 at 4:10 pm | #

                  I was thinking the samething.

                • Postponderance
                  Postponderance
                  August 23, 2011 at 9:28 pm | #

                  Assuming you mean N0083P00F, it looks like Lazy Tyke from “Go Get a Roomie”. (note: NSFW)

                  This information has been provided by your friendly neighborhood webcomics guru.

      • Khazzad
        Khazzad
        August 23, 2011 at 3:30 am | #

        Bahahahahaa that was amazing!

      • SolegitRR
        SolegitRR
        August 23, 2011 at 12:56 pm | #

        You are a shining golden god, sir.

      • Roborat
        Roborat
        August 23, 2011 at 4:05 pm | #

        That. Was. Brilliant.

      • Bill M.
        Bill M.
        August 26, 2011 at 2:41 pm | #

        Don’t forget, they claimed that if the fighting doesn’t stop, they’ll “fight fire with fire.” It seems that they told Joe that he’s “caught in a crossfire
        and you’ve got to choose which way you`re gonna go.” If he decides that he wants to “play the game tonight” then he’s going to cross the “point of know return.”

  8. Digidestined of Trust (Tim)
    Digidestined of Trust (Tim)
    August 23, 2011 at 12:04 am | #

    SHUT UP JOE! AAAGHH! Joe gets on my nerves more than any character besides Roz

    • Joebo
      Joebo
      August 23, 2011 at 12:08 am | #

      Dude… fiction.

      • Blob Marley
        Blob Marley
        August 23, 2011 at 11:26 am | #

        Nothin wrong with some nice, healthy fiction-rage.

    • Shifty
      Shifty
      August 23, 2011 at 12:11 am | #

      Yeah, but in this case he’s not the bad guy. Joyce is the one who is loudly screaming judgmentally at him. He’s didn’t start things.

      • Scotty Van
        Scotty Van
        August 23, 2011 at 12:15 am | #

        His response *is* especially skeevy, though.

        • gangler
          gangler
          August 23, 2011 at 12:53 am | #

          Antagonizing the antagonizer. He’s shown he can be pretty polite to those who treat him with at least the level of respect a housepet would get. Doesn’t seem to get worked up about full blown equal human being respect but hey, the guy’s entitled to his limits.

          Quite frankly I’m about as nonsexual a person as you’ll ever find, but if someone started loudly confronting me about such matters you better believe my response would be on the same general line of intentionally pushing their buttons sex wise while delivering ridiculously harsh insults.

        • Jackson
          Jackson
          August 23, 2011 at 2:01 am | #

          Gotta give him points for that final zinger, though.

        • Zanosuke_Kurosaki
          Zanosuke_Kurosaki
          August 24, 2011 at 2:48 am | #

          ^ This. For some reason, Joe is striking me as coming across as being at his most assholishness in today’s.

  9. Kaci
    Kaci
    August 23, 2011 at 12:04 am | #

    gah I did it! And I hit re-load so many times I started seeing things on my web page. Thanks for telling me when it uploaded, though now I am crazy obsessed.

    Heh, virgin frequency. If I listen closely, I can still hear it in the back of my head, telling me, “You know, you really shouldn’t have slept with those guys.”

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      August 23, 2011 at 12:11 am | #

      See? I just hope you get enough sleep afterwards, I’m lucky the new comic appears in the early afternoon over here.

      • Kaci
        Kaci
        August 23, 2011 at 12:12 am | #

        oh, no no no. I’m the 23 year old mom of a newborn. Mid twenties plus small child equals no sleep. And the energy to cope. And read webcomics.

      • Aizat
        Aizat
        August 23, 2011 at 12:14 am | #

        I’m just lucky I get to read the new comics. Next week is Eid, it’s going to be one busy week.

        • Kaci
          Kaci
          August 23, 2011 at 12:16 am | #

          I do not envy you. But having been there, snag whatever time you can, it IS possible. I believe in you.

  10. Berenzen
    Berenzen
    August 23, 2011 at 12:05 am | #

    Gah, can’t decide which look is funniest- walky’s realization, joyce’s blush, or her angry face.

  11. Kirby
    Kirby
    August 23, 2011 at 12:06 am | #

    Joyce looks like her head’s about to explode.

  12. Shifty
    Shifty
    August 23, 2011 at 12:08 am | #

    Haha! That’s it Joe, push those buttons! This is one time where I enjoy Joe’s lecherous attitude. The fact Joyce is standing there screaming at him for something that is NONE of her business is frankly more infuriating than Joe poking fun at a girl who assaulted him along with a third party.

  13. Joebo
    Joebo
    August 23, 2011 at 12:09 am | #

    I see that some part of Joe still plans on “fixing” Joyce.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      August 23, 2011 at 12:12 am | #

      Yes, the insane part AKA his penis.

    • Aizat
      Aizat
      August 23, 2011 at 12:15 am | #

      It’s Joe we’re talking about here. He do anything with a vagina that moves.

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        August 23, 2011 at 12:19 am | #

        So beastiality YES, necrophilia NO? 😛

        • Aizat
          Aizat
          August 23, 2011 at 12:20 am | #

          That depends on his mood that day.

      • Blue
        Blue
        December 14, 2011 at 12:32 am | #

        So he’s kind of like Jack Harkness, but straight? 😛

    • gangler
      gangler
      August 23, 2011 at 12:57 am | #

      I think he’s pretty sincere in his claim that he would have to be overcome by some form of insanity to stick his dick anywhere near her at this point. Joe appreciates a good lay, but she is just not worth the trouble here. Not when he’s already got a headline going for blocks.

      • Ancestral Hamster
        Ancestral Hamster
        August 23, 2011 at 2:30 am | #

        OH HELL YEAH!

        “Never eat at a place called Mom’s. Never play cards with a man named Doc. Never sleep with a woman with more troubles than you.”

        Joyce (as regards Joe) is spelled with a capital Trouble!

      • N0083rP00F
        N0083rP00F
        August 23, 2011 at 1:03 pm | #

        We he did put her on his “hit list” when they first met.
        Now I am thinking she is on his “will hit me list”

        Wonder if his health insurance includes reconstructive surgery?

  14. Daeva
    Daeva
    August 23, 2011 at 12:11 am | #

    Is it me, or does Walky look a little monkey-ish in the first couple of panels?

  15. iSaidCandleja-
    iSaidCandleja-
    August 23, 2011 at 12:13 am | #

    Does Walky look like that because he realized Dotty isn’t a virgin, or because of the way she non-chalantly acknowledged that he is?

    • NCP19
      NCP19
      August 23, 2011 at 12:18 am | #

      I figured it was the former.

    • Rowen Morland
      Rowen Morland
      August 23, 2011 at 9:38 am | #

      I guess he thought most people were in his situation.

    • Tobias
      Tobias
      August 23, 2011 at 3:25 pm | #

      Or option C, he just now realized she was in the room. I’m not sure he’s at the point yet where he can intentionally stand within ten feet of her and not go glassy-eyed or lose his ability to speak in coherent sentences.

      But yeah, learning that your crush has had sex can be a bit of a shocker for someone of Walky’s emotional age.

  16. Kaci
    Kaci
    August 23, 2011 at 12:14 am | #

    I love you guys! And this comic! So much love

    • iSaidCandleja-
      iSaidCandleja-
      August 23, 2011 at 12:19 am | #

      I’m sure Mike loves you too.

      • Kaci
        Kaci
        August 23, 2011 at 12:22 am | #

        if he doesn’t, I have a cousin with the same name. It’s almost like the real thing.

        • Blob Marley
          Blob Marley
          August 23, 2011 at 11:29 am | #

          If it’s your cousin, it’s definitely NOT the same kind of love.

          I hope.

  17. NF
    NF
    August 23, 2011 at 12:17 am | #

    Whoa. Somebody was bound to say it someday, I just can’t believe
    it was Joe.

  18. Leon
    Leon
    August 23, 2011 at 12:19 am | #

    I can’t wait to see Joyce’s reaction when she learns she’s a minority (virgin). And I’m starting to like Joe. At first I thought he was a jerk; now I see he’s more of a carefree moron.

    • N0083rP00F
      N0083rP00F
      August 23, 2011 at 1:05 pm | #

      No he is a Jerk and a carefree moron with possible self-destructive tendencies.

  19. T Campbell
    T Campbell
    August 23, 2011 at 12:21 am | #

    Not sure whether Walky is reacting to Dorothy’s implied admission that she’s not a virgin (probably) or her general tone implying that this Joe story is a personal problem for her (dark horse). Either way, he’s about to learn his goddess has a life outside his mental construction.

    Joyce and Joe work magnificently well when you’re not sure where things are going. (I mean, the J/J stuff in It’s Walky was often fun and interesting, but the odds of Joyce ending up with Walky always seemed too high for the possibility to really tantalize.)

  20. Mkvenner
    Mkvenner
    August 23, 2011 at 12:23 am | #

    So did Danny lose his virginity before Joe did?

    • Aizat
      Aizat
      August 23, 2011 at 12:25 am | #

      The world may never know.

      • Mkvenner
        Mkvenner
        August 23, 2011 at 12:30 am | #

        Anyway my money is on Danny.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      August 23, 2011 at 12:31 am | #

      Better Question: So did Danny lose his virginity TO Joe?

      • Daeva
        Daeva
        August 23, 2011 at 12:34 am | #

        Even better question, did Dorothy and Danny lose their virginity to Joe AT THE SAME TIME?

        • Mkvenner
          Mkvenner
          August 23, 2011 at 12:38 am | #

          You win hands down.

          • Blob Marley
            Blob Marley
            August 23, 2011 at 11:29 am | #

            Mike was here.

    • gangler
      gangler
      August 23, 2011 at 1:00 am | #

      Joe wasn’t born with a virginity. Somehow it just never formed during the embryonic stages.

      • gangler
        gangler
        August 23, 2011 at 1:05 am | #

        Danny still has his. It’s a stubborn little bugger. Sticks to him like glue no matter how much sex he has. “Feels just like I’m fucking for the first time”
        http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ibsxpihjKmE

      • espanolbot
        espanolbot
        August 23, 2011 at 3:21 am | #

        Well he did go through vagina as he was being bor… ICK!

  21. MM
    MM
    August 23, 2011 at 12:34 am | #

    Oh, man, Joyce looks like a pissed-off librarian in that last panel. Run, Joe, run!

  22. Vivvav
    Vivvav
    August 23, 2011 at 1:38 am | #

    Joe’s just digging himself a deeper grave.
    I love it.

    • gangler
      gangler
      August 23, 2011 at 1:40 am | #

      Deep as the grand canyon if you catch my drift 😉

      • ryan
        ryan
        August 23, 2011 at 8:58 am | #

        deep as the mariana trench

        • Blob Marley
          Blob Marley
          August 23, 2011 at 11:30 am | #

          Like a hot dog down a hallway.

          Wait, what?

  23. Confuzor
    Confuzor
    August 23, 2011 at 1:51 am | #

    I’m wondering why Walky would even open that door in the first place.

    • ryan
      ryan
      August 23, 2011 at 9:02 am | #

      doors are meant to be opened!

      unless there’s a box.

      • NF
        NF
        August 23, 2011 at 9:54 pm | #

        That’s why they invented sticks. To poke boxes.

  24. Random832
    Random832
    August 23, 2011 at 2:12 am | #

    The image is loaded with a width of 980, but has an actual width of 1000. This is caused by the width rule on “#page-wide” and the max-width rule on “img”. This makes the comic blurry.

    • David
      David M Willis
      August 23, 2011 at 10:22 am | #

      Refresh. The only reason the “actual width” is there is because I uploaded a larger comic, otherwise the comic would have remained smaller.

  25. Badass Toph
    Badass Toph
    August 23, 2011 at 2:25 am | #

    Joe uses tuant it’s super effective!

    • Malph
      Malph
      August 23, 2011 at 2:55 am | #

      Joe used Taunt.

      Joyce is enraged.

  26. Spiffster13
    Spiffster13
    August 23, 2011 at 6:55 am | #

    Wondering exactly what was going through Walky’s mind when she said that. That look is very open-ended

    Also I’ve seen that look of pissed before (not often mind you but it’s happened). RED ALERT, ALL HANDS BRACE FOR IMPACT!!

  27. Ronnie
    Ronnie
    August 23, 2011 at 9:11 am | #

    …Joe’s voice in my head is now cemented as Townsend Coleman’s Sentinel Prime.

  28. Palmetto
    Palmetto
    August 23, 2011 at 9:21 am | #

    Panel two is just short of perfect. If it only had a spit take.

  29. sarpiedon
    sarpiedon
    August 23, 2011 at 9:22 am | #

    wait…what? Joe has standards?

    • begbert2
      begbert2
      August 23, 2011 at 10:53 am | #

      Joe can afford to have standards; he’s not so short on willing women that he needs to get beat up by Mike (or the crazy girl) to try and get laid.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      August 23, 2011 at 9:47 pm | #

      Even Joe knows that it is best not to stick your dick into crazy.

  30. Paul1963
    Paul1963
    August 23, 2011 at 9:27 am | #

    Joyce has spent her entire life waiting for her parents to pick out a suitable husband for her. Then, and only then, will she and a strong-backed, Christian man (to whom she was introduced five minutes before the wedding) walk hand-in-hand to the Mating Shed, where, under the watchful eyes of Parson Budderchurn and Prudence, the Witness to the Consummation, they will perform the Act once. Missionary, of course. The Parson and the Witness will recite Scripture loudly, yet tonelessly, in order to prevent any Unclean Noises from escaping the Mating Shed. When the deed is done, Joyce and her new husband will clean themselves with cold water and Blessed Lava Soap before dressing and adjourning to the church for five hours of intense prayer.
    Thus will begin their life together.

    • Jetstream
      Jetstream
      August 23, 2011 at 9:42 am | #

      Like Hell. We know how Joyce’s parents are characterized, and I don’t believe they’ll change a whit. The instant Joyce gets the marriage thing going on, they’re probably gonna do something insane like give both their daughter and her husband some kind of crazy pills that will have them banging like bunny rabbits for at least a week.

      Grandchildren must be assured!

      • Seerow
        Seerow
        August 23, 2011 at 12:15 pm | #

        I never quite understood how Joyce came out so sheltered with parents who were as… adamant as hers.

        • Mkvenner
          Mkvenner
          August 23, 2011 at 3:03 pm | #

          I blame her pastor.

      • Paul1963
        Paul1963
        August 24, 2011 at 9:43 am | #

        Well, we know how Walkyverse-Joyce’s parents are characterized, but I don’t think we’ve seen them in DoA continuity yet. Here, they could be from whatever scary hollow Kenneth the Page is from (I stole “Mating Shed” from 30 Rock, but the rest I came up with myself).

        • Jetstream
          Jetstream
          August 24, 2011 at 9:32 pm | #

          Meh, he hasn’t significantly changed anyone’s base personality so far, except maybe Ruth, and we didn’t get to see a whole helluvalot of Ruth in Roomies.

    • Creaks
      Creaks
      August 23, 2011 at 10:03 am | #

      Lava soap made me chuckle.

      But no to quoting scripture.

      I Demand THIS man do the speaking while the deed is being done.

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RgwQ1eS9S7k

  31. Blob Marley
    Blob Marley
    August 23, 2011 at 11:33 am | #

    Can someone who actually knows how to do this crap please shoop a trollface onto Joe during panel 5?

  32. Sir Lancelot the Insane
    Sir Lancelot the Insane
    August 23, 2011 at 12:06 pm | #

    Joyce’s expression in that last panel is PRICELESS.

    Oh, Joe. You know you would hit that with like 7 crowbars if you could.

  33. Loki
    Loki
    August 23, 2011 at 12:12 pm | #

    Stay classy, Joe.

    I especially like how in panel five he’s imagining Joe-ing Joyce, and then in panel six, he’s really thought it through, and how it shows in his expression.

  34. Tetroga
    Tetroga
    August 23, 2011 at 1:15 pm | #

    Foreshadow much Willis?
    hahaha

  35. A Carnivorous Meece
    A Carnivorous Meece
    August 23, 2011 at 1:33 pm | #

    I liked Joe he was a fun character too bad i’ll never see him again after this

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      August 23, 2011 at 9:45 pm | #

      Why you say that? you think Joyce is gonna kill him?

  36. wew
    wew
    August 23, 2011 at 1:53 pm | #

    Damn Joe, that sound a little date rapey.

    • Mikehatesyou
      Mikehatesyou
      February 14, 2012 at 4:19 am | #

      Only one person in the comments mentioned how Joe implying he needs Joyce to be drunk to sex her up is rape.

      Joe will be in the papers again. Next time in ‘cuffs.

      Probably with a thumbs up and coy grin at at the camera though.

  37. Name
    Name
    August 23, 2011 at 2:11 pm | #

    Joyce is quickly becoming an easily hated character. I can disagree with you, sure, just don’t be such a loud bongo about it,especially when you’ve been sheltered and know fuck-all about the world. A dozen strips ago she couldn’t even clean a shower drain by herself.

    • gangler
      gangler
      August 23, 2011 at 4:52 pm | #

      Gotta love that good old fashioned Christian humility.

      • Blob Marley
        Blob Marley
        August 23, 2011 at 7:40 pm | #

        Your Gravatar makes this priceless.

  38. Hannover Fist
    Hannover Fist
    August 23, 2011 at 5:17 pm | #

    Quickly everyone, tune your radios to virgin frequency!

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      August 23, 2011 at 9:43 pm | #

      Better yet, a virgin whistle.

      • Name
        Name
        August 24, 2011 at 11:16 pm | #

        Is that a whistle only virgins can hear? A dog whistle for virgins?

  39. LeaLeonis
    LeaLeonis
    August 23, 2011 at 5:38 pm | #

    Now, I guess Joe’s cool enough not to overreact if she was to actually hit him, though part of me wishes he wasn’t… Even if Joyce might have good intentions of any sort, it’s impossible she doesn’t realize at some point what a pain in the neckshe can be. And if she continues to annoy everyone, especially people who are clearly way stronger than her, she has to face the consequences.
    Or should have to, at least. How else is she going to learn?

  40. Twinsnake
    Twinsnake
    August 23, 2011 at 8:30 pm | #

    I just realized, Joyce said she saw the article, not that she read it.

  41. Wolf
    Wolf
    August 23, 2011 at 9:41 pm | #

    Wait, is Walky implying that he isn’t a virgin? Seems like an odd comment to make otherwise.

  42. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    August 23, 2011 at 9:44 pm | #

    I remember a news report on how they created a ringtone that only teenagers can hear, I wonder if there is a special one for virgins too.

  43. Dahlia
    Dahlia
    August 23, 2011 at 9:47 pm | #

    You know…on the subject of hearing the voices of the characters…

    I’ve always wondered…

    What would Joyce sound like? I know Dexter had been given an actor to sound like (though I’m not sure if that’s a joke or not, probably IS…) but I don’t quite remember any other character given an actor or person to sound like… s: hmm.

    • gangler
      gangler
      August 23, 2011 at 10:40 pm | #

      Way I see it anyone who could voice Amy Rose could voice Joyce Brown.

    • David
      David M Willis
      August 25, 2011 at 11:04 pm | #

      After giving it some thought, plus watching some Scrubs, I’ve decided on Sonal Shah.

      And, yeah, I’m serious about the Head Alien sounding like Jon Lovitz. He’s who voices the character in Dumbiverse cartoon.

  44. Skydron
    Skydron
    August 23, 2011 at 11:27 pm | #

    Me thinks murder be on Joyce’s mind in that last panel lol

  45. Maycroft
    Maycroft
    January 20, 2012 at 5:36 pm | #

    Joe uses jerkery. it’s super efective.

    • RandomPerson12
      RandomPerson12
      October 23, 2014 at 8:12 pm | #

      Joyce uses rage. It will be effective in the next strip.

  46. DarkoNeko
    DarkoNeko
    April 13, 2015 at 6:41 pm | #

    *snerk*

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September 13/14, 2025 - Small Press Expo in Bethesda, Maryland

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Tim Onion @bencollins.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
Me two weeks ago: Jeffrey Epstein killed himself, not to protect anyone, but because entering prison as the world's most illustrious pedophile makes that a logical decision. Conspiracy theories make less sense than the stated story. Me now: The Pee Tape was shot on Epstein Island.
thetnholler.bsky.social's user avatarThe Tennessee Holler @thetnholler.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
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The people in the comments angry about what they see as Joyce and Dorothy cheating:
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when bluesky gives you a blue checkmark
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I also have a device that tells me to eat more carbs, it's my brain, and it's free
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Grandma’s Hospice Has Shitty Wi-Fi theonion.com/grandma...
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This Is Fucking Unacceptable, Reports Grandchild
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 9h
how do I have diarrhea, I haven't eaten anything
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He once ran a cake-frauding scam with the Best Friends Gang
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
I need more Muslim characters! Or at least more prominent ones who aren't Raidah. It is a huge giant hole in my strip that makes it suck. The current storyline would've been way better if they existed. But they don't, and no amount of throwing Asma in for three strips solves it.
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Doc Impossible @impossiblephd.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
That one Real Life Comic strip Tha cracked a million eggs.
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TRANS WOMEN OF BLUESKY: What was your egg cracking moment? When did you know you were trans? What made you realize? And did you know you were a woman right away, or did you pass through other identities first
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Linkara @linkara.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
Also, I see we're bringing back the ol' love octagon.
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John Berry @drawncoyote.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
It worked! Thanks, Joe! Also, sorry, Joe.
Joe:
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Happy Nonbinary People's Day, you gemstones. A year or two back we introduced FLASH GORDON's first enby, the outlaw lawman Bones Malock. Having known and loved a lot of nonbinary people, I knew the truest way to represent you was as a unsettling desert pirate with a lightning sword
Flash Gordon's Bones Malock:
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Flash: Okay... wait thirty seconds, then give me a distraction.

Bones: Got just the thing.

Flash: Do NOT blow the place up.

Bones: You're the boss.
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A blond female Philly Phanatic says
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Mood
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Nice.
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DaisyFM ✒︎ @daisyfm.net ⋅ 3d
Okay, everyone's jumping to conclusions, but Joyce was hit with a mysterious pink gas in Thursday's strip. Now, in recent years, the police are known to increasingly use military grade weapons. Which reminded me of this bit of proposed technology from the 1990s: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gay_bomb
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Gay bomb - Wikipedia
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I ain't readin' all that!
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hey, kid, what do you want to play with from the cool superhero movie? is it a nude, melting senator who feels like a stretch armstrong doll that has been left out in the son and maybe mildly chewed by a neighborhood dog? WELL, SON, YOU'RE IN LUCK!
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James Gunn i demand u bring back Conservative Superman
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Sal and Danny saw you from across the room and enjoy your vibe.
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