Dumbing of Age Book Eleven

Dumbing of Age

A college webcomic by David Willis
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this was about when maggie came up with the title of this storyline - think about it
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September 20, 2023

Hugs

by David M Willis on July 15, 2013 at 12:01 am
  • 04 - Just Hangin' Out With My Family

└ Tags: george, harriet, mike, walky

Discussion (173) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. Mkvenner
    Mkvenner
    July 15, 2013 at 12:02 am | #

    Well they haven’t changed.

    • Mr. Random
      Mr. Random
      July 15, 2013 at 12:53 am | #

      To be honest, we still haven’t seen enough. I always pictured them as the exact opposite of Mike. Kind on the outside but assholes on the inside. They will make you feel SO welcome in their house you will jump out a window to escape.

      • Beachfox
        Beachfox
        July 15, 2013 at 1:23 am | #

        Mike’s parents have also appeared in Shortpacked!.
        It appears their personalities remain unchanged across the dimensional divide.

      • Jackson
        Jackson
        July 15, 2013 at 10:19 am | #

        Mike isn’t a jerk with a heart of gold. He’s a jerk with a heart of jerk. Peel away the outer layer of asshole, and you’ll just find more asshole.

        • Mr. Random
          Mr. Random
          July 15, 2013 at 4:43 pm | #

          There are arguments for him being a jackass to people in order for them to grow up. Making Ethan feel bad about HIDING his sexuality, forcing Walky to choose between remaining a tiny kid in pajamas or grow up and compromise with his girlfriend. Thing is, he LIKES being an asshole. He enjoys it. But that doesn’t mean he isn’t doing the right thing too. He could definitely find a different way of doing things. He chooses not to.

          • Gordon
            Gordon
            July 15, 2013 at 7:00 pm | #

            Because he’s the hero that DoA deserves, but not the one it needs right now…and so they’ll tolerate him…because he can take it…because he’s not a hero…he’s a silent guardian, a watchful protector…the asshole.

            • edgecrus3r
              edgecrus3r
              January 11, 2014 at 9:09 am | #

              That. Is. Brilliant.

            • Lord Geovanni
              Lord Geovanni
              March 31, 2014 at 2:05 pm | #

              As Amasi-girl is the face and the light. Mike is the dark hero.

          • John
            John
            July 15, 2013 at 9:19 pm | #

            Yeah. Mike’s an interesting case. While other asshole characters, like, say, Mary or Malaya or even Billie, are jerks to people who don’t meet their standards – usually petty bullshit standards that they’re not very good at meeting themselves – Mike’s assholery generally takes the form of holding people to their own standards and exposing them to the worst consequences of their own actions.

            And while this often results in teaching his victims lessons and making them better people in the long run, it’s still not clear to me, even after knowing Mike for thirteen years in two worlds, and seeing that he’s capable of enormous self-sacrifice, whether he actually does it in order to teach them lessons and make them better people, or whether he does it just because he likes to hurt people, and the most effective way to do that is to make them hurt themselves, with any self-improvement being a side effect.

            But either way, there’s an element of instant karma to his gambits.

            • Nyzer
              Nyzer
              March 14, 2014 at 5:36 pm | #

              I’d say it’s not one or the other, but both. He does seem to want to see people improve, but he definitely likes being a troll about it.

              But it’s probably not even THAT simple. He’s also shown traces of masochism, and a very slight inability to comprehend how damaging his behavior can be (Dina).

              • DarkVeghetta
                DarkVeghetta
                June 21, 2015 at 3:25 pm | #

                Perhaps you meant ‘sadism’?

                • Nyzer
                  Nyzer
                  October 4, 2015 at 5:49 pm | #

                  Rereading this a year and a half later, no, I did not mean sadism. In Shortpacked, Mike is actually excited when he manages to provoke Amber into attacking him. He also acts as such in DoA when Amazi-Girl throws him to the floor, thinking he was the Whiteboard Ding-Dong Bandit. He also allowed himself to be assaulted by people after spoiling Harry Potter books the day of release in Shortpacked, despite being a supersoldier in that universe.

        • Fred
          Fred
          July 18, 2013 at 7:20 am | #

          Fractal asshole? Assholeception? Yo dawg, I heard you like assholes, so I put an asshole in yo asshole so yo can be a jerk while yo’ a jerk?

  2. Jackson
    Jackson
    July 15, 2013 at 12:02 am | #

    That answers one question.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      July 15, 2013 at 12:14 am | #

      But how many more questions will it raise.

      • SUGauthor
        SUGauthor
        July 15, 2013 at 12:23 am | #

        27 exactly.

        • MichaelHaneline
          MichaelHaneline
          July 15, 2013 at 1:53 am | #

          Recheck your calculations, I got 42.

          • Mr. Random
            Mr. Random
            July 15, 2013 at 2:11 am | #

            Okay, one of us is wrong. I got 35. Did either of you use Strong method?

            • Andiemus
              Andiemus
              July 15, 2013 at 3:14 am | #

              I used Farringanzibar’s rule and got 35X where X is the mean circumference of Mike and the mom in question’s heads.

              • Josh
                Josh
                July 15, 2013 at 4:19 am | #

                Farringanzibar’s Rule? That is so outdated, the Yipikaiyay Principle is the generally accepted method these day.

                • Fred
                  Fred
                  July 15, 2013 at 10:25 am | #

                  According to the Turnippuller Monkey method, it’s 1. Then again, it’s an abridged version of Farringanzibar’s rule that assumes that the conditions in Melophilus’ Theorem aren’t met. I didn’t check those, really, ain’t nobody got time fo’ dat.

                • ThaMojster
                  ThaMojster
                  July 20, 2013 at 6:40 am | #

                  Didn’t John McLane develop that method?

  3. Sensedog
    Sensedog
    July 15, 2013 at 12:03 am | #

    “The feels.”

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      July 15, 2013 at 12:09 am | #

      She might feel something alright… 😀

      • Aizat
        Aizat
        July 15, 2013 at 12:15 am | #

        Not a good time for morning wood, I’d imagine.

        • Aras Pabedinskas
          Aras Pabedinskas
          July 15, 2013 at 12:16 am | #

          Not a good time to have your blood pumpimg from embarassment, either.

          • Farmer_10
            Farmer_10
            July 15, 2013 at 3:59 am | #

            Ha! Dangly parts.

            • Aizat
              Aizat
              July 15, 2013 at 10:05 am | #

              Darn it, Phil-Ken Sebben.

  4. Wonder Wig
    Wonder Wig
    July 15, 2013 at 12:03 am | #

    The nights… the nights are so cold Walky.

  5. JBO
    JBO
    July 15, 2013 at 12:03 am | #

    Anytime I see them again I have to say I would have turned like mike too with those parents.

    • CanvasWolfDoll
      CanvasWolfDoll
      July 15, 2013 at 12:07 am | #

      i theorize they are actually exactly like mike.

      they are just always drunk.

      • JBO
        JBO
        July 15, 2013 at 12:09 am | #

        And because he was concieved while both parents were drunk Mike is now unable to be happy while sober. Thus continuing the devil’s circle.

    • Doctor_Who
      Doctor_Who
      July 15, 2013 at 12:10 am | #

      Those are pretty much MY parents, and I pretty much DID.

      • JBO
        JBO
        July 15, 2013 at 12:12 am | #

        You have my condolences. Do the cookies at least taste good? Because I like cookies.

        • Doctor_Who
          Doctor_Who
          July 15, 2013 at 12:16 am | #

          The chocolate chip are heavenly. But sometimes there are instead. Those are the bad days.

          Nothing against raisins in their place, but they should never substitute for chocolate chips.

          • Anon
            Anon
            July 15, 2013 at 12:30 am | #

            Oops you accidentally a word!

            For everyone else, “But sometimes there are (raisins) instead.”

            I know that was probably obvious, but I’m just trying to help anyone who might not have immediately understood.

            • Doctor_Who
              Doctor_Who
              July 15, 2013 at 1:20 am | #

              After midnight, I are dumb.

    • Aizat
      Aizat
      July 15, 2013 at 12:11 am | #

      I won’t.

  6. otusasio451
    otusasio451
    July 15, 2013 at 12:03 am | #

    The awkward…IT IS TOO MUCH!!!

  7. Gil
    Gil
    July 15, 2013 at 12:04 am | #

    so many people were basically right lol. also, Mike’s parents are friendly?!?

    • Aizat
      Aizat
      July 15, 2013 at 12:06 am | #

      Very friendly.

    • Bob
      Bob
      July 15, 2013 at 12:08 am | #

      they are in the original walkyverse. If the characterization is consistent between universes, Walky’s about to get his pants filled with cookies.

      • Aizat
        Aizat
        July 15, 2013 at 12:09 am | #

        Oh, I love cookies, especially chocolate chip. Too bad I can’t eat them at the moment.

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        July 15, 2013 at 12:10 am | #

        Which is not where you want cookies.

        • Neospector
          Neospector
          July 15, 2013 at 9:43 pm | #

          I beg to differ. Jeans can carry quite a lot of cookies and fabric softener smells nice.

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        July 15, 2013 at 12:11 am | #

        Mike’s mother just gives away her cookies to just about anyone? That explains Mike so much.

        • Leorale
          Leorale
          July 15, 2013 at 12:19 am | #

          She doesn’t even ask anyone for a nickel. It’s scandalous, really.

      • TaZZerath
        TaZZerath
        July 15, 2013 at 12:18 am | #

        As opposed to Nachitos?

      • MajesticSpaceBen
        MajesticSpaceBen
        July 15, 2013 at 12:24 am | #

        I’m a tad confused. Where in the walkyverse do the Warners appear? I’m surprised I don’t remember them.

        • Bob
          Bob
          July 15, 2013 at 12:31 am | #

          Shortpacked, chapter 10 and whatnot.

        • AsimovSideburns
          AsimovSideburns
          July 15, 2013 at 12:33 am | #

          I know they show up in Shortpacked!, but I’m not sure if they ever did in any of the others.

          There first appearance is here:
          http://www.shortpacked.com/2009/comic/book-10/01-this-man-this-manhattan/oatmeal/

          • AsimovSideburns
            AsimovSideburns
            July 15, 2013 at 12:34 am | #

            Okay, first: Their*

            Goddamnit.

            There is no second item on this agenda.

  8. Jen Aside
    Jen Aside
    July 15, 2013 at 12:04 am | #

    Mrs. Warner knows what’s up.

    [not Li’l Walky… yet?]

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      July 15, 2013 at 12:11 am | #

      Am I gonna need to draw more Rule 34? With that connotation it could get pretty nasty.

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        July 15, 2013 at 12:12 am | #

        Like that would stop you. 😀

        • JBO
          JBO
          July 15, 2013 at 12:13 am | #

          Walky: Hey Mike I banged your mom and afterwards she gave me a cookie. So I gave her a nickle in return.

          • Yotomoe
            Yotomoe
            July 15, 2013 at 12:15 am | #

            The news the next day:
            Mrs. Walkerton and Mike Warner were seen having sex in the middle of the campus, for 9 hours straight. The only word Mike had on the subject were “I got 5 nickels, dick”

            • Aras Pabedinskas
              Aras Pabedinskas
              July 15, 2013 at 12:19 am | #

              Walky: So my mom is worth more than yours? *Eyebrow wiggle*

              • Plasma Mongoose
                Plasma Mongoose
                July 15, 2013 at 12:24 am | #

                +1 LIKE

              • JBO
                JBO
                July 15, 2013 at 12:24 am | #

                Well you paid mine 1 nickel for 5 minutes.
                I paid your 5 nickels for 9 hours. Do the math.

                • Mr. Random
                  Mr. Random
                  July 15, 2013 at 12:59 am | #

                  Walky hates math. And it’s the sexy kind he doesn’t like here.

          • Aizat
            Aizat
            July 15, 2013 at 12:18 am | #

            Mike: I hope it’s chocolate chip because that’s the last thing you’d ever tasted.

            • Kaci
              Kaci
              July 15, 2013 at 11:12 pm | #

              We need to remove the chain because this is off it

  9. Sam
    Sam
    July 15, 2013 at 12:04 am | #

    MIKE KNOWS.

  10. Aizat
    Aizat
    July 15, 2013 at 12:04 am | #

    She’s so affectionate.

  11. Super Duper
    Super Duper
    July 15, 2013 at 12:05 am | #

    I’m not sure if this is the most hilarious or creepiest thing in history.

    • isitsevenyet
      isitsevenyet
      July 15, 2013 at 2:58 am | #

      Creepy. Definitely creepy. People demanding hugs out of others just… irritates me to no end.

  12. Aizat
    Aizat
    July 15, 2013 at 12:05 am | #

    You know, I was expecting Mr. Warner to smoke a pipe. You know, like dads do back in the 50’s…or how TV portray dads in the 50’s.

    • David
      David M Willis
      July 15, 2013 at 12:06 am | #

      Walkyverse Mr. Warner did. This version’s a decade or two younger.

      Also, smoking’s not allowed in the dorms.

      • Doctor_Who
        Doctor_Who
        July 15, 2013 at 12:11 am | #

        You could give him an e-cig?

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          July 15, 2013 at 12:12 am | #

          …or a bubble pipe.

          • Belades
            Belades
            July 15, 2013 at 1:42 am | #

            Where would one get a legit bubble pipe anyways? And how the heck would one make it work?

            • NightmareWarden
              NightmareWarden
              July 15, 2013 at 4:45 am | #

              If cartoons and comics have taught me anything, bubble pipes come from costume shops and English dollar stores. They ought to come with any detective Sherlock getup.

      • Brian Lynch
        Brian Lynch
        July 15, 2013 at 12:13 am | #

        He still says ‘sport’. And reads a ‘newspaper’.

        • David
          David M Willis
          July 15, 2013 at 12:13 am | #

          Yes, he does. I know because I wrote it!

        • timemonkey
          timemonkey
          July 15, 2013 at 1:06 am | #

          Lots of people read newspapers.

          • John
            John
            July 15, 2013 at 9:44 am | #

            Lies.

            • begbert2
              begbert2
              July 15, 2013 at 10:40 am | #

              To be fair, “lots” can mean “several dozen”.

              • timemonkey
                timemonkey
                July 15, 2013 at 2:05 pm | #

                I work at a Tim Hortons, I see hundreds of people with newspapers a day. Some leave them on the tables when they’re done and then we read them ourselves.

    • Rufus Saltus
      Rufus Saltus
      July 15, 2013 at 12:17 am | #

      Most dorms prohibit smoking in the building these days (sometimes it’s even prohibited within a certain range of the building.) While it is the case that students often ignore these rules, pipe smoke would still be likely to cause the alarms to go off and a firetruck brought in.

      • Belades
        Belades
        July 15, 2013 at 1:44 am | #

        The idea that a ban from smoking near the dorms would cause people to not do it is laughable. I walked by some guys lighting it up by the dorms entrance in the middle of Hurricane Sandy.

        • inkwell
          inkwell
          July 15, 2013 at 9:48 am | #

          I had a roommate who liked to smoke a hookah in our room, despite all our “No Smoking” rules and the really evil glares she got from our RA.

          • George
            George
            July 15, 2013 at 12:13 pm | #

            No way my RA would have let that slide. The floor stoners wound up having to build a giant cardboard plastic wrapped box they could put up against the window to sit in if they wanted to smoke.

            Engineers *eyeroll*

            • The Candyman
              The Candyman
              July 15, 2013 at 10:23 pm | #

              People will do anything to keep their habit. If I have to climb mountains and cross rivers for my coffee, then by Jove I’ll do it all.

  13. Gram91
    Gram91
    July 15, 2013 at 12:05 am | #

    Oh Mike, you never fail my expectations.

  14. Leorale
    Leorale
    July 15, 2013 at 12:05 am | #

    Would some one mind reminding me of this storyline’s title? It seems I’m too drunk to recall.

  15. Ryune
    Ryune
    July 15, 2013 at 12:05 am | #

    Bets on whether or not Mike has a well hidden and never worn matching argyle sweater vest?

    • Ryune
      Ryune
      July 15, 2013 at 12:06 am | #

      Goddamnit I keep forgetting I have the Mike gravatar.

    • Leorale
      Leorale
      July 15, 2013 at 12:09 am | #

      Mike burned it.

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        July 15, 2013 at 12:12 am | #

        It reconstituted though, because Argyle sweaters are timeless.

  16. Wack'd
    Wack'd
    July 15, 2013 at 12:06 am | #

    I’ll admit that I’m just going off his use of the word “sport”, but it’s nice knowing that no matter when Mike’s dad is born he’ll always appear to have wandered out of the fifties.

    • Aizat
      Aizat
      July 15, 2013 at 12:07 am | #

      I thought the sweater vest was a dead giveaway.

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        July 15, 2013 at 12:12 am | #

        Joyce Wears a sweater Vest.

        • Aizat
          Aizat
          July 15, 2013 at 12:13 am | #

          And look how she acted like.

          • Mr. Random
            Mr. Random
            July 15, 2013 at 1:01 am | #

            Point to Aizat. Remember the first to three points gets a silver Internet.

  17. John
    John
    July 15, 2013 at 12:07 am | #

    Oh yeah, called it.

  18. Aizat
    Aizat
    July 15, 2013 at 12:08 am | #

    I was expecting Mr and Mrs. Walkerton.

    • RobHagen
      RobHagen
      July 15, 2013 at 12:10 am | #

      That comes later. When the Warners and Walky are mid-group hug…

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        July 15, 2013 at 12:13 am | #

        Walky…are you…cheating on us!?

        • Kamino Neko
          Kamino Neko
          July 15, 2013 at 1:46 am | #

          Considering he’s hugging Mrs Warner with his dingle hanging out, that gives a rather…concerning impression of Walkerton family gatherings.

          • Mr. Random
            Mr. Random
            July 15, 2013 at 2:14 am | #

            He is on record as trying to hook up his sister with their neighbor. While they’re roomies!

            • John
              John
              July 15, 2013 at 9:55 am | #

              To be fair, for all the fuss she made about it at the time, the neighbor’s made a couple passes at his sister, too.

              • John
                John
                July 15, 2013 at 9:34 pm | #

                Hmm. Actually, on re-reading, the fuss Billie made was all about Joyce trying to hook her up with Walky. The suggestion that Billie hook up with Sal instead actually came from Billie herself, and Walky just suggested that he could help make it happen. (I think he’s delusional. Or remembering a different sister than the one he has now.) And Billie wasn’t nearly as vociferous about rejecting that idea. (I think she was too embarrassed to admit publicly that she really does want to go home every night to that, but with boobs. Or just didn’t want to encourage Walky.)

  19. RobHagen
    RobHagen
    July 15, 2013 at 12:09 am | #

    Hilarious! All hail Willis!

  20. Uniqueantique
    Uniqueantique
    July 15, 2013 at 12:11 am | #

    Good old dependable Mike.

  21. JebJeb
    JebJeb
    July 15, 2013 at 12:13 am | #

    Just realized that Mike’s dad looks a lot younger than his Walkyverse counterpart.

    • David
      David M Willis
      July 15, 2013 at 12:14 am | #

      We met them in the Walkyverse when they were 13 years older.

  22. Nono
    Nono
    July 15, 2013 at 12:13 am | #

    Nobody’s pointing out Mike’s burn in the first panel? I’m not sure if he’s going to be delighted that Walky’s hanging out instead of having a large stain on the crotch of his pants.

    • Belades
      Belades
      July 15, 2013 at 1:47 am | #

      I’m pretty sure he knows and may-or may not have been hoping for such an outcome when giving Walky those pants in the first place.

  23. AgentKeen
    AgentKeen
    July 15, 2013 at 12:17 am | #

    I think this is my new favorite strip in DoA.

  24. Ancestral Hamster
    Ancestral Hamster
    July 15, 2013 at 12:18 am | #

    Oh, this is just getting better … Let’s see if Mike will formally introduce his parents to Walky’s penis.

  25. xain
    xain
    July 15, 2013 at 12:18 am | #

    I will accept this group hug but only on the condition Mrs.Warner gives me a nickle

    • Aizat
      Aizat
      July 15, 2013 at 12:20 am | #

      A jar of chocolate chip cookie is fine too.

  26. Uniqueantique
    Uniqueantique
    July 15, 2013 at 12:25 am | #

    I think Mike’s happier that he doesn’t have the wet spot on his crotch…mommy hugging him now Is so much better. Although, I’m guessing either way makes Mike happ(ier).

  27. Robert
    Robert
    July 15, 2013 at 12:26 am | #

    I have a feeling Walky will forever be known as ‘Woody’ from here on in.

  28. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    July 15, 2013 at 12:32 am | #

    “Joyce and Sarah” gueststar in BF webcomic

    • Jen
      Jen
      July 15, 2013 at 11:05 am | #

      Wow. Thanks for the link. Has the character talking about them shown up in DoA or Walkyverse? O_o I don’t remember her, but I could have totally missed it. That’s not Sarah’s last roommate, is it?

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        July 15, 2013 at 6:38 pm | #

        That would be pretty cool if Willis did at least a cameo role for Carol, but from what I have noticed, that sort of thing is more likely to occur in SP! than in DoA.

  29. Dave
    Dave
    July 15, 2013 at 12:32 am | #

    The joke’s on Mike. He’s unwittingly pushing Walky to do who he could not: the only mom in all the world who Mike can’t fuck, for a nickel.

  30. Justnobody
    Justnobody
    July 15, 2013 at 12:32 am | #

    Man if I was getting hugged like that by Ms. Warner my little walky would be lifting his arms for a hug if you know what I mean.

  31. Echelon Four
    Echelon Four
    July 15, 2013 at 12:36 am | #

    Alternative punchline? http://www.dumbingofage.com/comics-rss/2013-07-15-hugs.png

    • Heatth
      Heatth
      July 15, 2013 at 8:27 am | #

      This is exactly the same strip. Was it different before? How so?

      • TheKelliestKelly
        TheKelliestKelly
        July 15, 2013 at 9:08 am | #

        Apparently it was. Willis just answered a question about on his tumblr http://itswalky.tumblr.com/post/55493874491/the-rss-feed-for-dumbing-of-age-is-showing-me-a

      • Kamino Neko
        Kamino Neko
        July 15, 2013 at 9:09 am | #

        The last panel is different in each. Mr Warner isn’t in the old one, and Mike’s line is totally different (‘I don’t say this often, but I love you, Mom.’)

        • Heatth
          Heatth
          July 15, 2013 at 12:24 pm | #

          Thanks.

  32. BooBoo
    BooBoo
    July 15, 2013 at 12:43 am | #

    I”m amazed that nobody is commenting on Walky pissing his pants…wait, it wasn’t piss. Ooh, this just got even dirtier, and Mike’s joke is so much worse. Walky’s got nocturnal emissions, ahahahahaha. I don’t even know what to do with myself at this point. Even if I’m wrong, that’s the only way I’ll read this from now on.

    • timemonkey
      timemonkey
      July 15, 2013 at 1:04 am | #

      Check out yesterday’s comic again.

  33. Gram91
    Gram91
    July 15, 2013 at 12:50 am | #

    I’m betting she brought a suitcase full of cookies.

  34. mrman643
    mrman643
    July 15, 2013 at 1:03 am | #

    I don’t understand all the cookie jokes. Was I supposed to read the other comics before I read this one?

    • vlademir1
      vlademir1
      July 15, 2013 at 1:31 am | #

      No. Nothing in DoA so far requires familiarity with the Walkyverse version of any of these characters… well, except occasionally the comments section.

    • David
      David M Willis
      July 15, 2013 at 1:53 am | #

      Argh, I’ve been getting lax on #3 again: http://www.dumbingofage.com/about/

  35. Ray
    Ray
    July 15, 2013 at 1:04 am | #

    OK, I’ll go for the obvious one:
    “REALLY excited to meet you, Mrs. Warner!”

  36. asdsadafa
    asdsadafa
    July 15, 2013 at 1:05 am | #

    I have been enjoying reading this comic during the weekend. How long will that last?

    • vlademir1
      vlademir1
      July 15, 2013 at 1:32 am | #

      IIRC the stretch goal on the Kickstarter campaign said a year. Presumably that stretch goal will also be on the next campaign as well.

  37. zomgvampires
    zomgvampires
    July 15, 2013 at 1:11 am | #

    ….I thought only Mike did moms?

    (did someone mention that earlier? probably. It needs repeating.)

    • Belades
      Belades
      July 15, 2013 at 1:59 am | #

      No, he also does threesomes and guys who are questioning their sexuality.

      • begbert2
        begbert2
        July 15, 2013 at 2:14 am | #

        Sometimes at the same time. In multiple different places, at the same time.

        • inkwell
          inkwell
          July 15, 2013 at 9:52 am | #

          And sometimes in multiple alternate universes.

  38. fangseeker
    fangseeker
    July 15, 2013 at 1:40 am | #

    ppphhhhttt BUWAHAHAHHAHAHAHA!

  39. The Hierophant
    The Hierophant
    July 15, 2013 at 2:08 am | #

    Anyone else notice Joyce and Sarah in today’s ‘Between Failures”? Seems Sarah has a habit of getting people expelled

    • Taigan
      Taigan
      July 15, 2013 at 5:19 am | #

      Awww… I wanted to post about that! 🙁

      Well, here’s the link for anyone who wasn’t already a follower:
      http://betweenfailures.com/comics1/1104-boot-to-the-head

  40. NewGuuuy
    NewGuuuy
    July 15, 2013 at 2:15 am | #

    my first comment I LOVE DOA AND I WANT A NICKEL who gonna give me one?

    • zomgvampires
      zomgvampires
      July 15, 2013 at 2:34 am | #

      Mike will give your mom a nickel.

      • zomgvampires
        zomgvampires
        July 15, 2013 at 2:35 am | #

        (And everyone else’s moms too.)

  41. John Harmon
    John Harmon
    July 15, 2013 at 2:54 am | #

    Webcomics don’t usually make me literally laugh out loud, but this one did. Perfect execution.

  42. Jenny Creed
    Jenny Creed
    July 15, 2013 at 4:08 am | #

    Such an awkward moment. If only there was a way for someone to fix it. . .with his penis.

  43. eddy_h
    eddy_h
    July 15, 2013 at 4:10 am | #

    This was pretty much exactly what I needed to wake me up this morning.

    Oh yeah, and I guess the strip’s pretty good, too. And the arc title joke. 😀

  44. eddy_h
    eddy_h
    July 15, 2013 at 4:12 am | #

    Wait… in frame 5 (of 6) … are Walky’s eyes dots, with his cheeks outlined from the sheer force of cringing… or are his eyes scrunched closed with his eyebrows crinkled up into mere dots? 🙂

    Once you see it…

  45. NightmareWarden
    NightmareWarden
    July 15, 2013 at 4:49 am | #

    I read this three times and even read the alt text before I noticed that Mike had made a joke about Walky wetting himself.
    I make “slow” into an art form. My art’s value is somewhere between one group hug and a nickel.

  46. turbanous
    turbanous
    July 15, 2013 at 6:15 am | #

    I was hoping that this would happen after reading yesterday’s comic

  47. EdoKara
    EdoKara
    July 15, 2013 at 8:24 am | #

    dear god, walky is in an even more horrifying situation than I could have possibly imagined…

  48. sarpiedon
    sarpiedon
    July 15, 2013 at 9:24 am | #

    I hope she’s wearin’ underwear…or at least has a Nickel

  49. Delirio
    Delirio
    July 15, 2013 at 10:27 am | #

    Well, maybe this incident finally convinces Walky of the advantages of real pants and underwear…

    But really, he could not secure himself sufficently between being spotted in the hallway and making it back to the room?

    • Regalli
      Regalli
      July 15, 2013 at 10:44 am | #

      It doesn’t button, so he can’t. And I suspect it’s fairly early in the morning (read: still AM) on a Saturday.

      • ShaggyDonahugh
        ShaggyDonahugh
        July 15, 2013 at 1:26 pm | #

        Oh god why?!

  50. averystrangeplace
    averystrangeplace
    July 15, 2013 at 11:31 am | #

    I am going to assume that the title of this arc is a Birdemic reference.

  51. Kirt Dankmyer
    Kirt Dankmyer
    July 15, 2013 at 11:56 am | #

    Hmmm, I guess it’s MILF week. Nice curves. 🙂

    • Justnobody
      Justnobody
      August 14, 2013 at 5:39 pm | #

      ^

  52. Mal
    Mal
    July 15, 2013 at 11:56 am | #

    I want “Let’s do it, Sport” to become a new meme around here.

    • AJBulldis
      AJBulldis
      July 15, 2013 at 11:12 pm | #

      Let’s do it, Sport.

  53. LtSaraD
    LtSaraD
    July 15, 2013 at 12:14 pm | #

    maam i really need to change my pants then, maybe, ill hug u.

  54. Lurlock
    Lurlock
    July 15, 2013 at 12:19 pm | #

    Only Mike could figure out how to use a group hug as a weapon…

  55. someguywithakatana
    someguywithakatana
    July 15, 2013 at 3:10 pm | #

    -Reads rollover text-

    Your wife is the best wife, clearly.

  56. Dan Shive
    Dan Shive
    July 15, 2013 at 4:07 pm | #

    No means no, Mike’s mom.

    • John
      John
      July 15, 2013 at 9:39 pm | #

      Harriet will give you non-consensual cookies, too.

  57. Rse
    Rse
    July 15, 2013 at 7:23 pm | #

    i knew i was going to hate college about 2 minutes after i walked in my dorm room and my first sweaty roommate hugged me. I never saw her coming.

  58. Bunk
    Bunk
    July 15, 2013 at 10:59 pm | #

    Wouldn’t it be the biggest irony if Walky actually wound up banging Mike’s Mom, even if it was completely on accident.

    • Kaci
      Kaci
      July 15, 2013 at 11:10 pm | #

      I love this so much.

  59. zedocax
    zedocax
    July 16, 2013 at 12:10 am | #

    i can see why mike hates everything

  60. Jack Faire
    Jack Faire
    July 16, 2013 at 1:22 am | #

    I had never seen Mike’s parents prior to this and I was thinking, “What could have made him such a horribly mean person” now it all makes sense and that isn’t sarcasm this really does answer the question in the most wonderfully twisted way.

  61. Maycroft
    Maycroft
    July 20, 2013 at 2:16 pm | #

    Mike, you’re a Master, you’re a genius you’re Elvis, you’re God.

  62. SgtNumnum
    SgtNumnum
    October 14, 2013 at 9:12 am | #

    Is there a reason Walky was going commando?

  63. a snow ʍousɐ
    a snow ʍousɐ
    November 24, 2015 at 8:31 am | #

    I’ll lift my arms for a nickel

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