Dumbing of Age Book Eleven

Dumbing of Age

A college webcomic by David Willis
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if ethan's favorite transformer is chromedome, i think we now have an idea whose amber's is
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BUFFER WATCH Comics are currently drawn and uploaded through:

September 20, 2023

Promised

by David M Willis on December 14, 2013 at 12:01 am
  • 01 - The Only Dope For Me Is You

└ Tags: amber, ethan, joyce, sarah

Discussion (402) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. Tunaro
    Tunaro
    December 14, 2013 at 12:01 am | #

    HOLY SHIT AMBER!!!!!!!!!1!!!!!!1!

    • Psycho
      Psycho
      December 14, 2013 at 12:21 am | #

      Amber needs either a therapist, a punching bag, or both. Cheezus, both of them seem to have made an equal and concerted effort to fuck their friendship up the asshole.

      • GoldStarz
        GoldStarz
        December 14, 2013 at 12:24 am | #

        Professional Punching Bag Therapist

        • newllend
          newllend
          December 14, 2013 at 12:29 am | #

          Holy shit that’s not a bad idea, no no really THINK about it

          • Tunaro
            Tunaro
            December 14, 2013 at 12:30 am | #

            Sounds like the perfect job for masochists. Or Faz.

            • Batman
              Batman
              December 14, 2013 at 1:42 am | #

              I’ve found fighting crime by punching homeless and insane people is very theraputic. It releases a lot of the inner tensions resulting from my unresolved chilhood trauma.

              • Boom
                Boom
                December 14, 2013 at 1:52 am | #

                Yeah, that’s good for you. Thanks, by the way, for inspiring the Joker to terrorize the motherfucking city while you were at it, you underwear-on-the-outside jackass.

                • apostateCourier
                  apostateCourier
                  December 14, 2013 at 1:57 am | #

                  It was the other way around, neh? The Joker would have been just as crazy without Batman. There was this big court thing where the DA proved that his entire rogue’s gallery would have been just as criminally insane without Batman ever being a thing.

                • Boom
                  Boom
                  December 14, 2013 at 2:59 am | #

                  … well, naturally.

                • FAZ
                  FAZ
                  December 14, 2013 at 4:45 am | #

                  Mind showing what proves that Batman is innocent of such guilt?

                  I think it goes against many parts of the Batman mythos, where it’s clearly established that Batman presence potentially increased the criminally insane while greatly reducing the small thievery/assault/etc.

                  He strikes fear in the heart of criminals and criminals are a superstitious lot. So most of them quit. A few take it as a challenge, and decide to one-up the bats themselves.

                • David Willis
                  David M Willis
                  December 14, 2013 at 4:58 am | #

                  The current Year Zero re-origin of Batman clearly establishes that folks like the Riddler and other extravagant criminals predated Batman, partly in a way to clear Batman of such bad mojo. They created him, rather than the other way around.

                • ShaggyDonahugh
                  ShaggyDonahugh
                  December 14, 2013 at 10:23 pm | #

                  @Tenn, correctamundo.

                • Parnifia the Bastard
                  Parnifia the Bastard
                  December 16, 2013 at 9:36 am | #

                  I honestly stopped keeping track of both DC and Marvel comics in the new millennium. So I really don’t have any idea what you people are talking about. It’s killing my soul.

                • ProjectXa3
                  ProjectXa3
                  December 17, 2013 at 11:14 pm | #

                  Also, even before the New 52 there was an episode of BtAS where the Arkham inmates and a sympathetic [read: misguided] lawyer put Bats on trial for all the “misfortunes” that led to them going to crime. Long crime spree short, the sane people concluded that even without Batman the nutters woulda wound up crime-spreeing anyway. *Maybe* without the colorful personas, but the crime and violence would still be there.

              • rachel
                rachel
                December 14, 2013 at 2:56 am | #

                I guess you’re joking and stuff but it’s not like people who don’t have a place to sleep are worthless 🙁

                • Tenn
                  Tenn
                  December 14, 2013 at 4:56 am | #

                  If you get that he’s joking, why are you replying as if he was serious?

                • CleverTrousers
                  CleverTrousers
                  December 14, 2013 at 4:57 am | #

                  I think that was more of a comment on Batman.

                  Also, if there are still unwillingly homeless people that Batman sees every night and there aren’t a ton of homeless shelters popping around Bruce Wayne’s a massive tool.

                • rachel
                  rachel
                  December 14, 2013 at 5:33 am | #

                  tenn – because people used to make jokes about extremely uncool shit and now we’ve learned a little better – why can’t we learn better here that things like homeless people dying, which actually happens, all of the time less of a punchline and more of a thing that we can all give a damn about?

                • saltchocolate
                  saltchocolate
                  December 14, 2013 at 10:07 am | #

                  ^ That. Except you accidentally typed “used to” in that sentence, rachel.

                • rachel
                  rachel
                  December 14, 2013 at 2:44 pm | #

                  saltchocolate – : ) yeah you are totally right. such a good comment section this is, man!!

                • Tenn
                  Tenn
                  December 14, 2013 at 4:08 pm | #

                  @rachel: You seem to believe that “Batman’s” joke trivializes or ridicules the suffering of homeless people. That it somehow denies that homeless people dying is a real thing, or that it somehow prevents us from giving a damn about it. It doesn’t. It’s not even a joke about the homeless. It’s a joke about an alleged hero being an immoral asshole.

        • LiaHansen
          LiaHansen
          December 14, 2013 at 1:20 am | #

          She needs Hulk Hogan.

          • Equuizzicals
            Equuizzicals
            December 14, 2013 at 3:37 am | #

            LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING BROTHER, THE BEST THERAPY IS A YAPPAPI INDIAN STRAP MATCH!
            YOU’LL HIT ETHAN WITH THAT INDIAN STRAP UNTIL HE’S ON HIS KNEES SAYING “PLEASE AMBER I CAN’T TAKE ANYMORE”. AND BROTHER THATS WHEN YOU’LL MAKE YOUR TRANSFORMATION INTO HOLYWOOD AND HIT HIM UNTIL THE STRAP HITS THE BONE AND HE’LL START BEGGING “PLEASE HOLYWOOD.NO MORE OF THE YAPPPAPI INDIAN STRAP.” BUT YOU’LL NEVER STOP. FOR ALL THE LITTLE AMBERMANIACS OUT IN THE WORLD YOU CAN NEVER STOP.

            Or you could like talk to a therapist.

            • Varangian
              Varangian
              December 14, 2013 at 4:00 am | #

              WHATCHA GONNA DO, ETHAN SIEGEL, I SAID TELL ME WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO WHEN AMBERMANIA RUNS WILD ON YOUUU?!?

          • Renshear Blade
            Renshear Blade
            December 14, 2013 at 4:24 am | #

            http://thechive.files.wordpress.com/2012/03/funny-gifs-my-dreams.gif

        • Robert
          Robert
          December 14, 2013 at 1:27 am | #

          Okay you’re hired. *Hits GoldStarz over the head* Welcome to employment.

      • Ourorboros
        Ourorboros
        December 14, 2013 at 1:40 am | #

        Not that Ethan coming to terms with being gay is an easy path, but let’s look at what Amber is dealing with again:

        Asshole abusive father.
        Ethan’s parents, his mom blames her for him turning gay.
        Fighting all summer – the above is because Amber fought Ethan’s parents on his behalf.
        The complete rejection on prom night. The feminine version of emasculation.
        Mike’s little mind bomb. I like the guy, but his stuff can’t be easy to digest on ground zero.
        Danny (of all people) rejecting her and calling her a user.

        A lack of space to decompress from all of the above. How is the friendship supposed to heal if he doesn’t give her the space to do the same?

        After all that, all the abuse she went through Ethan is crawling back into the closet (again, not saying easy on him, but see her perspective).
        A similar scene from her spring/summer playing out in front of her in spite of her warnings.

        So yes, Amber is a little tightly wound. Not all her fault.

        • Boom
          Boom
          December 14, 2013 at 1:53 am | #

          It’s a little bit weird hearing all that from Joe… can… can you come back and say this all again when you’re not Joe?

          • Ourorboros
            Ourorboros
            December 14, 2013 at 2:44 am | #

            I should have ended that with saying her issues make her a patient needing Dr Dong and probably a wild cat in bed.

        • TheKelliestKelly
          TheKelliestKelly
          December 14, 2013 at 2:41 am | #

          I love and thank you for saying all of this. I get so frustrated with so many people saying that Amber needs to mind her own business and acting like she’s completely in the wrong.

        • Focka
          Focka
          December 14, 2013 at 7:04 am | #

          Oh come on. I love Amber, I do, but let’s look at this again:

          Ethan’s asshole parents have been giving her the cold shoulder, but what do you think they’ve been acting like with Ethan, who obviously would care way more what they think about him, than Amber does?

          And I know people in the comments love to hate on Danny, but Amber honestly behaved quite badly with Danny and his parents – specially since it’s clear that Clark Kenting does work in this universe. Sure, Danny’s no saint in all of this, but neither is Amber, and of the two, I can’t believe I’m saying this, but Danny’s behaved better.

          Ethan otoh also dealing with asshole parents and pretty much no support structure, except for people who want him to “stop being gay”.

          • Khrene Cleaver
            Khrene Cleaver
            December 14, 2013 at 12:46 pm | #

            … He had Amazigirl on his lap. HOW DO YOU NOT RECOGNIZE HER.

            • begbert2
              begbert2
              December 14, 2013 at 11:19 pm | #

              has he had Amber on his lap? I think it’s like that spiderman thing; to recognize a superhero you have to make out with them at exactly the same angle you made out with their other persona.

              Also, more seriously, there’s pretty good reason to think that either the comic’s night shots are colored brigher than they actually are, or that Danny had poor night vision. (Or both.) And on a less-mentioned not, Danny may not realize that the campus only has fifteen students attending. Yes, we know that, but he may not realize that every superhero he meets has a %50 chance of being one of the three girls he’s spoken to. Because you totally know that if you went out and randomly met two different people of the same gender and roughly similar physical type, it’s perfectly reasonable to assume they’re actually the same person.

          • Ourorboros
            Ourorboros
            December 14, 2013 at 6:04 pm | #

            Ethan’s parent’s acted considerably better towards him than Amber, as seen on Parent’s day.
            If Amber fought with them on his behalf, that means he was hiding.
            They blame Amber for turning him gay, but not Ethan for being gay.
            They still have anger at Amber, but certainly not Ethan. Mom’s line translated to “My anger was only my love for you because of how society will treat you, now fuck pussy until you’re straight.”
            Amber has had no time to process this. Her time line went:
            Rejected on prom night
            Fight Ethan’ parents
            Have no support from Ethan, because otherwise he could fight
            Ethan crowding in, giving no emotional space.

            As for Danny & parents, remember that it started with finding cover from her dad. She did not purposely act badly, but at dinner her feelings she had been developing came out. Sure Danny didn’t know, though his fantasy of being Lois Lane requires him to date two women. So I only blame his continual lack of spine. But Amber isn’t acting in the same space and after dealing with her father, she was very near her negative emotions. The very stuff she can’t deal with in real life, the reason why she became Amazi-Girl.
            So if you need to blame anybody there, blame Amber’s father. He set up the conditions and reasons for that meeting. She did not set out to have that dinner, she was looking for help and protection.

            The real problem here is that you must assign primary blame. There are really just two damaged people having to cope while in close proximity.
            Ethan is the bad guy in Amber’s story because of what she gave up for him.
            Ethan still hasn’t dealt with being gay and just wants his old future back, so Amber is the friend he can’t talk to, potential hazard for closeting, and angry bongo at the moment.

      • Lord Geovanni
        Lord Geovanni
        April 3, 2014 at 8:57 am | #

        That is what crime fighting is for

  2. Ourorboros
    Ourorboros
    December 14, 2013 at 12:02 am | #

    Run, she has yet to figure out how the world works, much less the fact that she has issues to work out.

  3. GoldStarz
    GoldStarz
    December 14, 2013 at 12:02 am | #

    0_0

    Amber scares me…

    Somebody hide me from her.

    • KingMabel
      KingMabel
      December 14, 2013 at 12:02 am | #

      I’ll hide you!

      • Tunaro
        Tunaro
        December 14, 2013 at 12:04 am | #

        It’s no use! She can sense fear!

        • lejwocky
          lejwocky
          December 14, 2013 at 12:16 am | #

          My god… berserker!

    • Ourorboros
      Ourorboros
      December 14, 2013 at 12:02 am | #

      She even transported Ethan to a red pocket dimension.
      The flames and pitchforks can’t be far behind.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      December 14, 2013 at 12:05 am | #

      Amber be firing her lasers!

      • Tachyon
        Tachyon
        December 14, 2013 at 12:50 am | #

        Nah, that’s a pretty standard rage-empowered table-flip. Lasers are a level 10 superpower at least.

        • Ourorboros
          Ourorboros
          December 14, 2013 at 1:47 am | #

          Amber is Hulking up.

          • Boom
            Boom
            December 14, 2013 at 3:00 am | #

            And this isn’t even her final form.

            • Keroshino
              Keroshino
              December 14, 2013 at 3:10 pm | #

              She went from being Hulk Hogan….And is now “The Hulk”

  4. Sock
    Sock
    December 14, 2013 at 12:02 am | #

    RAGE FACE!

    • Cragalanch
      Cragalanch
      December 14, 2013 at 8:30 am | #

      No, rage FAAAAAAAAAAACE

      • Kyrros
        Kyrros
        December 15, 2013 at 12:04 pm | #

        Someone explain “FAAAAAAACE” to me… I see it all the time on these boards… and have no idea where it came from.

        • Jeva
          Jeva
          December 16, 2013 at 5:06 am | #

          http://www.dumbingofage.com/2010/comic/book-1/01-move-in-day/face/

  5. KingMabel
    KingMabel
    December 14, 2013 at 12:02 am | #

    That table flip was the 3rd most epic thing in this comic ever….

    • HMRC4EVR
      HMRC4EVR
      December 14, 2013 at 12:04 am | #

      Somewhere off to the side IDW Prowl is taking notes.

    • Marc in MN
      Marc in MN
      December 14, 2013 at 1:12 am | #

      Until it landed on Riley…

      “Why does everyone here hate me?? I just wanted some cereal!”

      • saltchocolate
        saltchocolate
        December 14, 2013 at 10:12 am | #

        Now we know what happened in yesterday’s strip — Riley wasn’t just randomly annoying Sarah, she was trying to hide behind her, to avoid being collateral damage in Amber’s rage-fest. When Sarah shooed her off, she had no choice but to flee the impending amber-pocalypse.

    • Roborat
      Roborat
      December 16, 2013 at 4:31 pm | #

      Especially when you realize that the tables are bolted down.

      • Roborat
        Roborat
        December 16, 2013 at 4:35 pm | #

        You would think that I would eventually learn to read further down before I post a comment. You would think that, but noooooooo.

  6. Geminia999
    Geminia999
    December 14, 2013 at 12:02 am | #

    Wouldn’t the tables in a cafe like that be nailed down? And is Ethan’s favourite Chromedome?

    • Jen Aside
      Jen Aside
      December 14, 2013 at 12:03 am | #

      Ours never were, because people moved them around all the time to form cliquesgroups

      FLIPTOP LOL

      • Tunaro
        Tunaro
        December 14, 2013 at 12:07 am | #

        Had to replace all ours after someone figured out how to do grievous harm with a cafeteria chair.

        • Tachyon
          Tachyon
          December 14, 2013 at 12:52 am | #

          “Figured out”? What, were your cafeteria chairs made of plastic or something?

          I dunno what you sat in, but our cafeteria chairs are metal and fabric at best, and mostly metal at worst. Heavy enough to break the glass walls (kinda surprised it hasn’t happened yet to be honest).

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      December 14, 2013 at 12:05 am | #

      That table WAS nailed down.

      • Doctor_Who
        Doctor_Who
        December 14, 2013 at 12:06 am | #

        Bolted to the floor actually.

        • Boom
          Boom
          December 14, 2013 at 3:02 am | #

          And the floor is kept in place by prayer. Or gravity.

      • sentrythedefiant
        sentrythedefiant
        December 14, 2013 at 12:07 am | #

        Hence the red background. You know shit’s serious.

  7. Tioras
    Tioras
    December 14, 2013 at 12:02 am | #

    I feel like the tags should include Blaine.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      December 14, 2013 at 12:05 am | #

      If she breaks his back the tags should include Bane.

      • Casanova
        Casanova
        December 14, 2013 at 12:10 am | #

        Wow. Good one.

      • Batman
        Batman
        December 14, 2013 at 1:43 am | #

        That was insensitive.

        • Farmer_10
          Farmer_10
          December 14, 2013 at 9:21 am | #

          Oh, go dedicate your life to crimefighting to avoid dealing with your grief.

  8. Safgaftsa
    Safgaftsa
    December 14, 2013 at 12:02 am | #

    Does anyone else remember that whole “aggression” business involving Amber’s dad?

    • Ourorboros
      Ourorboros
      December 14, 2013 at 12:10 am | #

      Or Mike’s point.

      • Mr K
        Mr K
        December 14, 2013 at 1:33 am | #

        Seriously, If Amber doesn’t change herself she could end up like Blaine. Blaine probably didn’t start off as abusive, but instead grew that way. I’ve heard that children from abusive families are more likely to be abusive

        • Jim
          Jim
          December 14, 2013 at 4:18 pm | #

          The word you’re looking for is “has”. She HAS ended up like Blaine. Her hobby involves running around hitting people, and she’s literally physically abusing her friend just because when he did exactly what she blackmailed him into doing it didn’t ruin his life enough for her.

          She’s already an abusive asshole, there’s not actually any more slope to slip off of here.

    • Jack Finch
      Jack Finch
      December 14, 2013 at 7:48 am | #

      Wait, did something happen with Amber’s dad? (sarcasm font)

      • StClair
        StClair
        December 16, 2013 at 6:19 am | #

        Go back to reading your scooter mags, Jack.

        • Roborat
          Roborat
          December 16, 2013 at 4:36 pm | #

          got to get that Mod thing figured out, right?

  9. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    December 14, 2013 at 12:02 am | #

    Amber is having a Historial Jesus moment.

    • KingMabel
      KingMabel
      December 14, 2013 at 12:05 am | #

      “You have turned this campus into a den of horrible relationships!”

      Mark 12: 28

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        December 14, 2013 at 12:06 am | #

        I cannot like this enough! ^_^

      • Jack Finch
        Jack Finch
        December 14, 2013 at 7:47 am | #

        Is there any other kind of campus?

      • Kernanator
        Kernanator
        December 14, 2013 at 12:14 pm | #

        You mean it wasn’t already?

    • Ourorboros
      Ourorboros
      December 14, 2013 at 6:14 pm | #

      Hm, last summer she sacrificed herself to absorb Ethan’s parent’s anger of his sin of being gay.

  10. Opus the Poet
    Opus the Poet
    December 14, 2013 at 12:03 am | #

    Table flip FTW!

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      December 14, 2013 at 12:15 am | #

      (╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻

      • Tunaro
        Tunaro
        December 14, 2013 at 12:18 am | #

        ┬─┬ノ( º _ ºノ)

        • carl320
          carl320
          December 14, 2013 at 12:26 am | #

          We can’t be leaving the comments section in complete disarray, can we?

          • Keroshino
            Keroshino
            December 14, 2013 at 2:00 am | #

            ┻━┻ ︵ヽ(`Д´)ノ︵ ┻━┻

            • Boom
              Boom
              December 14, 2013 at 3:03 am | #

              ┬─┬ノ( º _ ºノ) ┬─┬

              • KingMabel
                KingMabel
                December 14, 2013 at 8:45 am | #

                This place is messy enough with tables being upturned everywhere… what are we, animals?

                • Tunaro
                  Tunaro
                  December 14, 2013 at 1:02 pm | #

                  ┻━┻ ︵ヽ(^ΦωΦ^)ノ︵ ┻━┻

                • Regalli
                  Regalli
                  December 14, 2013 at 4:25 pm | #

                  ┬─┬ノ( º _ ºノ) ┬─┬

                • nothri
                  nothri
                  December 14, 2013 at 10:45 pm | #

                  Why are so many of you depicting the Bunny Cat (who is a dick) from Madoka standing between tori gates?

                • Keroshino
                  Keroshino
                  December 15, 2013 at 6:48 am | #

                  /人◕ ‿‿ ◕人\

                • Roborat
                  Roborat
                  December 16, 2013 at 4:37 pm | #

                  And now magical girls everywhere are running for their lives.

  11. JebJeb
    JebJeb
    December 14, 2013 at 12:03 am | #

    I heard the Mortal Kombat theme song when I read this.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      December 14, 2013 at 12:06 am | #

      TEST YOUR MIGHT.

      • JebJeb
        JebJeb
        December 14, 2013 at 12:08 am | #

        Flipping a table that was more than likely bolted to the floor would be something Shao Kahn would be impressed with.

        • timemonkey
          timemonkey
          December 14, 2013 at 12:52 am | #

          Flipping a table that’s bolted to the floor is something Kahn’s sex slaves could do, he wouldn’t even notice.

  12. nothri
    nothri
    December 14, 2013 at 12:03 am | #

    Wow. First time I’ve seen someone so angry they LITERALLY did a table flip.

    • Steven
      Steven
      December 14, 2013 at 4:33 am | #

      LITERALLY in this fictional internet comic.

      • Pagannerd
        Pagannerd
        December 14, 2013 at 8:01 am | #

        Literal and fictional are not mutually exclusive.

  13. Joe Stando
    Joe Stando
    December 14, 2013 at 12:03 am | #

    WHOOOAAAAA

  14. GoogerGeiger
    GoogerGeiger
    December 14, 2013 at 12:04 am | #

    So Amber’s favorite transformer is starSCREAM?

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      December 14, 2013 at 12:06 am | #

      MEGATROOOOOOOOOOOOOOON.

      • lejwocky
        lejwocky
        December 14, 2013 at 12:12 am | #

        TETSUOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

        • Tunaro
          Tunaro
          December 14, 2013 at 12:15 am | #

          KAKAROOOOOOOOOOOOOTTTTT

          • Plasma Mongoose
            Plasma Mongoose
            December 14, 2013 at 12:16 am | #

            SPOOOOOOOOOOON!

          • Wonder Wig
            Wonder Wig
            December 14, 2013 at 12:16 am | #

            LEEEEROOOOOOOOOOOOOY

            • Tunaro
              Tunaro
              December 14, 2013 at 12:17 am | #

              JENKINNNNNNNNSSSSSSSS

              • Ahighfunctioningsociopath
                Ahighfunctioningsociopath
                December 14, 2013 at 12:20 am | #

                GOOOOOOODDDDDDDAAAAMMMIIIITTTTTTT
                NAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPAAAAA

              • Allcool-dontcare
                Allcool-dontcare
                December 14, 2013 at 12:36 am | #

                Geeeeerrrrrroooooonnnnnniiiiiimmmmmmoooooooooooooooooooo

                • ninja_jesus
                  ninja_jesus
                  December 14, 2013 at 12:43 am | #

                  KAGOMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

                • LiaHansen
                  LiaHansen
                  December 14, 2013 at 1:13 am | #

                  KEEEEEEEEEEEBLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

                • I don't know what to put here.
                  I don't know what to put here.
                  December 14, 2013 at 1:24 am | #

                  IIIIIIIIZAAAAAYAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!

                • Foxhack
                  Foxhack
                  December 14, 2013 at 1:57 am | #

                  KANEEEEEEEDAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

                • Boom
                  Boom
                  December 14, 2013 at 3:05 am | #

                  I DON’T KNOW WHAT WE’RE YELLING ABOUT!

                • Paradox
                  Paradox
                  December 14, 2013 at 3:14 am | #

                  Quite why KHHHAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNN!!!! has been missed off this list I don’t know…

                • Jenny Creed
                  Jenny Creed
                  December 14, 2013 at 4:36 am | #

                  METAL GEARRRR?!

                  No but seriously, is it Megatron? I’m not very hip with the transformers.

                • CianM1301
                  CianM1301
                  December 14, 2013 at 11:19 am | #

                  WIIIIIIILMAAAAAAAA!

                • chrisleech
                  chrisleech
                  December 30, 2013 at 7:03 pm | #

                  WAAAAAAAAAAAZZUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUPPP

          • Hoboturtle
            Hoboturtle
            December 14, 2013 at 1:59 am | #

            COOOooooooOOooooBbbbRRrrrAaaaa!

            • Cragalanch
              Cragalanch
              December 14, 2013 at 8:36 am | #

              Snake? Snake? SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE!!!

        • Yotomoe
          Yotomoe
          December 14, 2013 at 12:16 am | #

          KAKAROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT

          • lejwocky
            lejwocky
            December 14, 2013 at 12:18 am | #

            KHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN

            • Thor
              Thor
              December 14, 2013 at 12:23 am | #

              HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERE’S JOHNNY!

              • Kyrros
                Kyrros
                December 15, 2013 at 12:09 pm | #

                HIYOOOOOOOOOO!

                • Kyrros
                  Kyrros
                  December 15, 2013 at 12:10 pm | #

                  and because I can’t edit…

                  http://www.hiyoooo.com/

                • Roborat
                  Roborat
                  December 16, 2013 at 4:38 pm | #

                  Gary?

        • Tacdud2
          Tacdud2
          December 14, 2013 at 12:29 am | #

          Kanedaaaaaa

          • Kiggy
            Kiggy
            December 14, 2013 at 1:02 am | #

            YAAAHOOHOOHOOIEEEEEEE

    • Baroncognito
      Baroncognito
      December 14, 2013 at 12:13 am | #

      No, there was one transformer in the comics who liked flipping tables.

      • Baroncognito
        Baroncognito
        December 14, 2013 at 12:17 am | #

        There we go DamnYouWillis has posted an image from said comic on his tumbler.

  15. C.W. Roden
    C.W. Roden
    December 14, 2013 at 12:04 am | #

    I think Amber is suffering from Danny withdrawls (or Danny DTs)….bigtime!

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      December 14, 2013 at 12:08 am | #

      So much time without a straight man!! Oh gosh.

      • Hoboturtle
        Hoboturtle
        December 14, 2013 at 2:00 am | #

        Wait, do you mean sexuality or character trait?

        • Gneiss
          Gneiss
          December 14, 2013 at 10:29 am | #

          Probably sexuality, since Danny is way too incompetent at everything to be the straight man of the comic.

          • Thanks, I'll Have Another!
            Thanks, I'll Have Another!
            December 14, 2013 at 12:35 pm | #

            Dina is the straight man of this comic.

            • Yotomoe
              Yotomoe
              December 14, 2013 at 1:06 pm | #

              I actually did mean the character trait.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      December 14, 2013 at 12:08 am | #

      DDT is not good for your health.

      • KingMabel
        KingMabel
        December 14, 2013 at 12:15 am | #

        DDT usually leads to STF, which is much more painful.

        • Ahighfunctioningsociopath
          Ahighfunctioningsociopath
          December 14, 2013 at 12:26 am | #

          Yeah, no one wants shortpacked transformer fever. You become an amalgam of Ethan and Willis, only in the sense of your devotion to transformers.

          • Tachyon
            Tachyon
            December 14, 2013 at 12:56 am | #

            Wouldn’t that result in this campus becoming known as “Shortpacked Transformer Fever University”? 😀

            • Roborat
              Roborat
              December 16, 2013 at 4:39 pm | #

              I saw what you did there.

        • ninja_jesus
          ninja_jesus
          December 14, 2013 at 1:15 am | #

          I’d rather follow it up with a Camel Clutch.

          • James
            James
            December 14, 2013 at 2:28 am | #

            ARMBAR!!!!

    • Jack Finch
      Jack Finch
      December 14, 2013 at 7:51 am | #

      I’m starting to think that Danny may have gotten out in time.

  16. sentrythedefiant
    sentrythedefiant
    December 14, 2013 at 12:04 am | #

    I’m not too surprised, considering that the whole Ethan-coming-out-pre-prom-coitis was one of the major catalysts for Amber becoming Amazi-Girl.

    And Ethan kissed Joyce while starring Amber down…not too swift.

  17. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    December 14, 2013 at 12:04 am | #

    The 3rd panel looks like Ethan is copping a feel.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      December 14, 2013 at 12:09 am | #

      Turns out he’s not attracted to women. He’s attracted to violence.

      • neeks
        neeks
        December 14, 2013 at 7:55 am | #

        I thought we already knew he wasn’t attracted to women.

        • Yotomoe
          Yotomoe
          December 14, 2013 at 1:07 pm | #

          But the violence is what drew him to Amber!

  18. chris73
    chris73
    December 14, 2013 at 12:04 am | #

    Go Amber you good thing!

    • Keroshino
      Keroshino
      December 14, 2013 at 1:11 am | #

      No…I really don’t think she is.

      • Jack Finch
        Jack Finch
        December 14, 2013 at 7:15 am | #

        She’s bad trouble.

  19. someguywithakatana
    someguywithakatana
    December 14, 2013 at 12:05 am | #

    “IT’S MY DECISION, DAMN IT!!!”

    Wait, what?

    • ninja_jesus
      ninja_jesus
      December 14, 2013 at 1:16 am | #

      It’s more that Ethan’s current actions are shitting all over Amber’s efforts to defend his sexuality from his parents and other people from over the summer.

      • John
        John
        December 14, 2013 at 3:45 am | #

        I think there’s a hefty helping of, “Goddammit, if you can pretend to be straight with this random chick at college, why the hell couldn’t you keep pretending to be straight with me long enough to wrong me until I had a good scapegoat just the once?!” in there, too.

        • ninja_jesus
          ninja_jesus
          December 14, 2013 at 5:29 am | #

          Yeah, I think Amber feels betrayed that he’s willing to try for Joyce, while the revelation during prom night scarred her emotionally. It wasn’t fair to Amber, nor was it fair to Ethan. Victims of circumstance.

          • taekwondogirl
            taekwondogirl
            December 14, 2013 at 9:24 am | #

            I know that’s a big thorn in Amber’s side, but I don’t think that’s what is making her so angry right now. Ethan is flat out denying who he is, and she still cares about him. On top of that, he’s basically “praying the gay away” or trying to, which is enormously harmful.

            • Kladeos
              Kladeos
              December 14, 2013 at 7:11 pm | #

              He just kissed another girl in front of her, when the last she knew he was going to come clean and break up.

    • taekwondogirl
      taekwondogirl
      December 14, 2013 at 9:22 am | #

      Being gay isn’t a choice. Ethan is still grappling with depression and low self-esteem due to the way his parents handled him coming out. By being gay, he feels like he’s lost control over his own life. Him choosing to go against it is not just because he’s afraid of being alone and thinking he’d never find a guy who would like him, but also as an attempt to have control over his life again.

      • Chug
        Chug
        December 14, 2013 at 10:12 am | #

        Being gay isn’t a choice, but how you deal with it is (kinda like Amber’s bad temper, in a way). Ethan’s still trying to figure out how he wants to deal with it, and he’ll probably go through a number of methods, some healthy, some not healthy, before he settles on one he’s comfortable with. College is a time for experimentation, right? The point being, it has to be *Ethan* who comes to the conclusion, Amber can’t do it for him or force him to come to a realization before he’s ready. THAT’S unhealthy.

        • taekwondogirl
          taekwondogirl
          December 14, 2013 at 11:21 am | #

          I absolutely agree with everything you’ve said. However, this is *Dumbing* of Age and they’re all around 18 so prepare for a lot of poor choices.

  20. Vivvav
    Vivvav
    December 14, 2013 at 12:05 am | #

    And thus Amazi-Girl becomes a supervillain.

    • saltchocolate
      saltchocolate
      December 14, 2013 at 12:09 am | #

      When Amber turns the background red, you know her Blaine-chromosome is flaring up.

      • Tom T.
        Tom T.
        December 14, 2013 at 12:43 am | #

        I’ve said it before; she’s the Ravager to his Deathstroke.

        • Crimson Doom
          Crimson Doom
          December 14, 2013 at 10:13 am | #

          Except Deathstroke is significantly more deadly than Blaine, and Amber is decidedly more nerdy than Ravager.

          …dang it, now I want to write a crossover between the two. Somehow.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      December 14, 2013 at 12:12 am | #

      Amazi-Girl becomes A-menacing-Girl

      • saltchocolate
        saltchocolate
        December 14, 2013 at 12:29 am | #

        +1

  21. Wonder Wig
    Wonder Wig
    December 14, 2013 at 12:06 am | #

    And now the judge’s score on that table flip:
    USA 9.2
    FRA 8.8
    SWE 9.1
    CHI 8.5
    GER 5.3

    • KingMabel
      KingMabel
      December 14, 2013 at 12:07 am | #

      That German judge is a bit strict…

      • Stephen Bierce
        Stephen Bierce
        December 14, 2013 at 12:11 am | #

        Usually it’s the Russian judge that is so problematic. So you throw out the low and the high, and add the rest together for a score of…26.4 points out of a possible thirty.
        On to the next round!

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          December 14, 2013 at 12:18 am | #

          The Russian judge would award extra points for the epic red background.

          • Historyman68
            Historyman68
            December 14, 2013 at 12:20 am | #

            In Soviet Russia, table flips you?

            • Tachyon
              Tachyon
              December 14, 2013 at 12:58 am | #

              Either that, or in a massage parlor run by the Hulk.

      • Jack Finch
        Jack Finch
        December 14, 2013 at 7:45 am | #

        Must be an old East German leftover. Those DDR aparatchiks were notorious.

        • Kyrros
          Kyrros
          December 15, 2013 at 12:14 pm | #

          I thought the joke was always the French judge with the unusually low score towards the American?

  22. Kladeos
    Kladeos
    December 14, 2013 at 12:08 am | #

    Well now, this looks fun.

  23. sentrythedefiant
    sentrythedefiant
    December 14, 2013 at 12:09 am | #

    I think the thing that truly shows the extent of Amber’s anger is the reverse-colored speech bubble.

  24. TSB
    TSB
    December 14, 2013 at 12:10 am | #

    I’m guessing Amber sees Ethan’s mom’s hand in this. She ran interference all summer and now Ethan is giving in anyway. She’s struggling not to turn out like her dad and Ethan is buckling under familial pressure. Her secrets are destroying her relationship, while Ethan is somehow able to be honest about something that should be way worse, and still has a girlfriend anyway.

    Yeah, I can see why she would be this frustrated, though obviously this is a terrible and counterproductive reaction. Poor Amber is going to a really dark place lately.

    • friendshipranger
      friendshipranger
      December 14, 2013 at 12:14 am | #

      I love this comment, and you deserve a +1.

  25. saltchocolate
    saltchocolate
    December 14, 2013 at 12:13 am | #

    Joyce, you’d better put on the armor of Christ, because you’re about to walk into Armageddon.

    • Eric Burns-White
      Eric Burns-White
      December 14, 2013 at 12:16 am | #

      …I would pay twenty dollars American money* for M. Willis to draw Joyce going through the full armor sequence from Bibleman.

      (* Payment would only be made post Christmas when money was a going concern again. Not that it would be an issue, since M. Willis is unlikely to be commissionable at that amount. Offer not valid in OH, AK or the District of Columbia.)

      • Rosie
        Rosie
        December 14, 2013 at 7:28 am | #

        Everyone who is wondering what Eric is talking about, here you go: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YEKwrI5MYIM

        • saltchocolate
          saltchocolate
          December 14, 2013 at 10:24 am | #

          Wow. I’d make Eric’s $20 real.

          Can I just say that, in my head, the “breastplate of righteousness” had a whole different flavor? I won’t even mention the “shoes of peace” . . . Now I see more clearly what Paul had in mind. Obviously, my mistake was the misquote: it’s the “full armor of GOD” — not Christ. You remember God: the one who smited everything that moved in the Old Testament . . .

        • NoOneOfConsequence
          NoOneOfConsequence
          December 14, 2013 at 7:26 pm | #

          OR….
          ….the venture bros variant:
          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O_QGEmoFhDk

  26. Eric Burns-White
    Eric Burns-White
    December 14, 2013 at 12:14 am | #

    God help me, the first thing I thought when I saw panel three was “huh, Amber’s got a pretty awesome rack.”

    • KingMabel
      KingMabel
      December 14, 2013 at 12:16 am | #

      God help us for not thinking as you do…

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      December 14, 2013 at 12:19 am | #

      Truly Amber has Boobs Of Steel.

    • Noxx
      Noxx
      December 14, 2013 at 1:06 am | #

      I approve this message.

    • John
      John
      December 14, 2013 at 3:49 am | #

      Amazing. It’s Amazing.

      (In other words, yeah, me too.)

    • Boom
      Boom
      December 14, 2013 at 4:38 am | #

      She also makes the rockin’ world go ’round.

      • Ocbrad1
        Ocbrad1
        December 14, 2013 at 10:41 am | #

        +1 for your awesomeness!

  27. Gottawonder
    Gottawonder
    December 14, 2013 at 12:14 am | #

    I don’t think it matters at this point, I mean if the table used to be nailed to the floor or not. She didn’t appear to notice. Awesome artwork.

    Yes Saffaftsa, the ‘aggression’ business is part of reason why Amber does Amizigirl-to give her rage an outlet.

    Raises the question? Who else’s decision would it be, if both he and the girl he is going out with agree?

    Don’t get me wrong, I think Ethan is a total dick the way he has been acting, and is playing Joyce in the worse way. Another type of girl maybe a more sophisticated one (or one with no self-esteem whatever), would beard for him with no entanglements. But, Joyce is just not worldly enough to handle the situation she is in with him: still lives in fantasy world that she may be able to convert him. So yeah Sarah, run.

    • Shanunu
      Shanunu
      December 14, 2013 at 1:54 am | #

      I keep thinking something similar though the comment section is against me. I mean, its Ethan’s choice to date a girl, though being gay wasn’t. He’d be HAPPIER dating a guy but I mean, he’s CHOOSING not to at this point. Joyce is going along with it (though I seriously hope she’s not really looking up wedding chapels) and is choosing to date a guy she knows is gay. That doesn’t really make either of them wrong, IMO, and Amber flipping crap (and tables) should be more because she didn’t get that option than forcing him to be gay, I’d say. He didnt choose who he likes, but he can choose who he dates, can’t he?

      • taekwondogirl
        taekwondogirl
        December 14, 2013 at 9:27 am | #

        Obviously he gets to choose who he dates. No one’s discounting that. The problem is saying that it’s a good choice. He’s “praying the gay away”, which has been proven to be harmful and ineffective. He is denying a core part of himself by doing this. He’s not asexual or aromantic, so dating someone he doesn’t actually have any interest in boning is not fair to himself nor to Joyce, even though both of them think they know what they’re doing.

        • Bill
          Bill
          December 14, 2013 at 2:13 pm | #

          Is Joyce trying to “pray the gay away” any worse than Ethan’s parents, who both seem to think that if he starts screwing women he can “fuck the gay away”?

          • saltchocolate
            saltchocolate
            December 14, 2013 at 3:21 pm | #

            Nope. Equally fucked up.

          • Jelli
            Jelli
            December 14, 2013 at 6:11 pm | #

            When did Joyce ever try to “pray the gay away”? If anything, ETHAN is the one who’s try to “pray the gay away”.

          • taekwondogirl
            taekwondogirl
            December 14, 2013 at 8:48 pm | #

            No, but I don’t see any point that actually makes? It doesn’t suddenly make what Ethan and Joyce are doing okay.

      • saltchocolate
        saltchocolate
        December 14, 2013 at 10:26 am | #

        Joyce is really looking up wedding chapels. Yes, she is.

        • Heavensrun
          Heavensrun
          December 14, 2013 at 12:17 pm | #

          This. My main problem with the relationship is that Joyce really really -is- thinking that this will work out, and that the gay can be prayed away. She has lived a sheltered life surrounded by a bubble of fundamentalists who have constantly reinforced the notion that homosexuality can be driven away by devotion to God. I don’t feel like she has the world experience necessary to know how this will turn out. I DO feel that Ethan does, but that he’s preoccupied with his short term selfish sense of comfort.

  28. Karen Rustad
    Karen Rustad
    December 14, 2013 at 12:15 am | #

    Joyce kinda has Faz-face in that last panel. :/

    • David Willis
      David M Willis
      December 14, 2013 at 12:20 am | #

      Faz is designed to look smug, and sometimes other characters look smug.

      • Jackson
        Jackson
        December 14, 2013 at 8:39 am | #

        Faz is the Coke of smug.

  29. Jake
    Jake
    December 14, 2013 at 12:16 am | #

    Poor Amber. Nothing’s working out for her, is it? This rage she’s showing right now is going to hurt Ethan and that’s just going to be too much for Amber to take. No amount of Joyce punchlines can make me feel happy after a panel like that.

    • Dude
      Dude
      December 14, 2013 at 12:48 am | #

      You’re not supposed to always feel happy. This isn’t that type of comic, just sayin. It’s actually about a gamut of emotions that make up real life.

    • Ourorboros
      Ourorboros
      December 14, 2013 at 2:49 am | #

      “Joy and pain
      Sunshine and rain”.

      Joys are felt more strongly because of the pain we have felt. Victories are more meaningful to those who have lost. And vice versa.
      Also, no character growth only through punchlines and jokes.
      Good writing uses both sides of the human experience to play off each other. Ethan accepting himself will feel like more of a break through and triumph for his weakness of the moment.

    • Jack Finch
      Jack Finch
      December 14, 2013 at 8:17 am | #

      Your suffering makes the buffer grow.
      In the little shop of horrors metaphor, Willis is Seymour, the Buffer is the plant, your suffering is the blood-must be fresh.

  30. Kernanator
    Kernanator
    December 14, 2013 at 12:16 am | #

    I thought this was a Drama-Free Zone! Or is that just within a certain distance of Sarah?

    • Ourorboros
      Ourorboros
      December 14, 2013 at 2:51 am | #

      Within bat swinging distance of Sarah.

      • Kernanator
        Kernanator
        December 14, 2013 at 12:08 pm | #

        “If this is more drama I will punch it in the face.”

  31. Mr. Random
    Mr. Random
    December 14, 2013 at 12:17 am | #

    I like Amber more now.

  32. friendshipranger
    friendshipranger
    December 14, 2013 at 12:18 am | #

    k[Boobage]^(dT/dA) = ass kicking capability
    http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/BoobsOfSteel

    • friendshipranger
      friendshipranger
      December 14, 2013 at 12:20 am | #

      The comment here is in relation to a deleted comment. The joke no longer has context, and in retrospect, seems crass. Apologies.

      • David Willis
        David M Willis
        December 14, 2013 at 12:21 am | #

        I have deleted nothing! You’re probably looking for Eric Burns-White’s post a few threads up.

        • Mr. Random
          Mr. Random
          December 14, 2013 at 12:52 am | #

          You really DO read every comment…

  33. kenny
    kenny
    December 14, 2013 at 12:19 am | #

    oh shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!!!!

  34. gangler
    gangler
    December 14, 2013 at 12:19 am | #

    Simmer down na.

  35. kenny
    kenny
    December 14, 2013 at 12:20 am | #

    seriously though, Amber needs to seek help for her anger problems.

  36. Jesse
    Jesse
    December 14, 2013 at 12:21 am | #

    Is the hovertext referring to Hardhead?

    • DT
      DT
      December 14, 2013 at 12:35 am | #

      Prowl:
      http://itswalky.tumblr.com/post/69948140386

  37. Gordon Blvd
    Gordon Blvd
    December 14, 2013 at 12:22 am | #

    I’ll take “Psychobongo” for $400, Alex………………….

    • Opus the Poet
      Opus the Poet
      December 14, 2013 at 1:39 am | #

      You wouldn’t hail from Augusta GA would you Gordon Blvd?

  38. Dierna
    Dierna
    December 14, 2013 at 12:24 am | #

    Meep!!! Amber smash!! ((0))¿((0))

  39. newllend
    newllend
    December 14, 2013 at 12:26 am | #

    Wow, I think amber and Sarah might get along

    Ive decided, I think I’m just going to let the entire Ethan/Joyce go, I’ve became a hater just filled directionless anger for no reason at all, so I’m just going to chill and watch everything work itself out and if shipping goes down the fucking drawn that would be a score, just going to let things play out

  40. Allcool-dontcare
    Allcool-dontcare
    December 14, 2013 at 12:28 am | #

    Amber smash puny Ethan!

  41. NoneOfYourConcern
    NoneOfYourConcern
    December 14, 2013 at 12:33 am | #

    I’m kinda wondering what happened with Dina. If Riley left, and Amber is freaking out……

    • E.R.
      E.R.
      December 14, 2013 at 2:02 am | #

      She’s just sitting there, off panel, incredibly confused by all of this.

    • alicemacher
      alicemacher
      December 14, 2013 at 5:11 am | #

      She’ll stay out of it as long as it doesn’t deteriorate into paleontology-bashing.

  42. Ryugen
    Ryugen
    December 14, 2013 at 12:36 am | #

    Panel 3 is my favorite panel of all time.

  43. Baker
    Baker
    December 14, 2013 at 12:40 am | #

    Amber: “Violence is who I am!”

  44. Jack Faire
    Jack Faire
    December 14, 2013 at 12:41 am | #

    Amber is right. He is scared. It’s easier as a gay man to hide in the closet and play pretend even if you are being completely open. Ethan so obviously just wants to be “normal” while being open as a gay man that he will bury himself in a straight relationship so that he can be like what is around him.

    We grow up in a straight world. The only gay men are in shows we aren’t allowed to watch or are jokes. Will and Grace was a good show but it still felt like “if you are gay you can’t act like every other guy acts”

    He is choosing Joyce kind of out of fear. He came out in high school but now he has a chance to jump back in the closet. If someone doesn’t do an Amber level freak out on him then he could wind up not only ruining his and Joyce’s lives but their kids if it goes that far when he finally grows brave enough to venture out for real.

    • ninja_jesus
      ninja_jesus
      December 14, 2013 at 1:50 am | #

      But maybe if that happens they will birth a Marten-esque child (from QC). 😀

    • Ourorboros
      Ourorboros
      December 14, 2013 at 2:02 am | #

      See Mike & Ethan at Chik-fil-a.

      Joyce is using Ethan for her fears too, pretty much confirmed when he came out and also in her odd sex dream. Her fundamentalism plays a part too, but a gay boyfriend is as sexually neutral as a boy band.

    • Baroncognito
      Baroncognito
      December 14, 2013 at 5:22 am | #

      That is one thing I do like about Brooklyn 99.

  45. Maycroft
    Maycroft
    December 14, 2013 at 12:42 am | #

    I am strangely aroused by panel 3.

  46. Dude
    Dude
    December 14, 2013 at 12:46 am | #

    Ok. Can I vote again and let Amber be my favorite?

    • KingMabel
      KingMabel
      December 14, 2013 at 1:02 am | #

      Only if you didn’t vote for Dina.

      • Intie
        Intie
        December 14, 2013 at 1:09 am | #

        Are there people like that?

        • KingMabel
          KingMabel
          December 14, 2013 at 1:15 am | #

          Apparently so. According to the recent poll 56% of voters did not vote for Dina.

          If this were a race between Dina and “everyone besides Dina” Dina would have lost!

          • saltchocolate
            saltchocolate
            December 14, 2013 at 10:30 am | #

            I did not vote for Dina. She’s great, but there are others who are greater (including, in my vote, Amber)!

  47. Keroshino
    Keroshino
    December 14, 2013 at 1:02 am | #

    HOLY SHIT!!!!

  48. Tarkada
    Tarkada
    December 14, 2013 at 1:03 am | #

    Did Ethan just Dan it up or is Amber being really high and mighty because she fought for him in the past?

    • Baker
      Baker
      December 14, 2013 at 1:28 am | #

      I think Ethan was acting disrespectful of her considering what he put her through, she fought for him and was denied sex on prom night. She thought they were going to get married and then it crashed apart all around her and she had to emotionally labor for him at the same time it happened. All so he could be himself, be out of the closet, and I’m sure she believed be with men. Now he’s just shutting down and hiding behind Joyce. Pretending he is someone he isn’t and that he can have what he needs from her even when he sees it in other places like Joyce’s sibling.

      All that said flipping a table over is not an acceptable way to act regardless.

      I see a lot of parallels with her and the Street Fighter character Ryu. Ryu struggles against a consuming rage and indiscriminate violence as well, but most of the time is under control and only fights as a hero. He keeps on fighting as a hero in search of a means to control his rage, and that just seems a lot like Amber to me.

  49. Intie
    Intie
    December 14, 2013 at 1:08 am | #

    Would someone please refresh my memory, why is Ethan acting like a dick to his supposedly best friend?

    Also I guess we’re now witnessing the theory of “you are inevitably becoming like one of your parents in a relatinship”. Because that is how people work. Alright.

    • Trisar
      Trisar
      December 14, 2013 at 1:31 am | #

      Or…

      A.) Ethan is rationally choosing to remind Amber that a decision, mutually agreed upon by both him and Joyce, that Amber herself was unable to even try to make, is his and Joyce’s business, not Amber’s, and she’s trying to make it her business against his wishes. This doesn’t seem like friend-like behavior.

      B.) Amber has admitted already that she has tons of emotional issues. Honestly, she should be seeking counseling for this sort of thing. As evident in panel 3, where she proceed to flip a table (and her shit) over Ethan choosing to defend his decisions, and apparently trying to tell him that his life is not his own to rule, but hers. Again, this is very not-friend-like behavior.

      • Intie
        Intie
        December 14, 2013 at 1:48 am | #

        You’re forgetting the part where Ethan has been unreasonably arrogant for the past few times we’ve seen them together. Arrgant with the girl who’s her best friend, who supoorted him and stayed with him even after being practically dumped. Who then betrayed her by starting to date a girl even after coming out. On the campus they’re both attending. So that Amber doesn’t even have the chance not to see it.

        • Steven
          Steven
          December 14, 2013 at 4:38 am | #

          When it gets to the point in panel 3, being “a big rude meanie” is not justification for Amber’s behavior. Nothing Ethan’s done warrants Amber’s reaction. It is uncalled for in any similar scenario.

          • Steve
            Steve
            December 14, 2013 at 12:01 pm | #

            And Amber gets no moral high ground here, having a relationship with Danny in another identity. She had her chance to come clean with him and didn’t. Hell, she’s had every chance in the world to tell him since they met. I’m sure the friendship between Amber and Ethan can survive this. I’ve had friendships survive worse…

    • Ourorboros
      Ourorboros
      December 14, 2013 at 2:00 am | #

      He isn’t intentionally.
      See, if kissing Joyce was spiteful Ethan would be ready and even fired up for a fight.
      Yes, I agree that Amber went through a lot for Ethan when Ethan seemed to run from his issues.
      But Ethan gave up a lot too, see his conversation with Mike at Chik-fil-a.
      He’s still running. He wants the normal life he had in front of him. He wants to go back.

      So he went into the closet, which comes off as looking like being a jerk towards Amber.

      The point of this arc should be that there are two hurt people here trying to deal with their issues while living in proximity to each other. They are only accidental villains to the other’s respective story.
      Plus Joyce, who seems to be teflon, who uses Ethan to avoid her own fears and keep her self deceptions.

    • Ourorboros
      Ourorboros
      December 14, 2013 at 3:13 am | #

      Why do we scream at each other?
      This is what is sounds like when doves cry.

      • ninja_jesus
        ninja_jesus
        December 14, 2013 at 5:22 am | #

        WHOA.

        Seeing a parallel between that song and Amber/Ethan.

        Amber is being much like her father (too bold) while Ethan is being like his mother (never satisfied).

        Mind blown.

        • Ourorboros
          Ourorboros
          December 14, 2013 at 6:20 pm | #

          Thanks. Had this arc taken a different turn, my choice was
          “Been away, haven’t seen you in a while.
          How’ve you been?
          Have you changed your style and do you think
          That we’ve grown up differently? Don’t seem the same
          Seems you’ve lost your feel for me

          So let’s leave it alone, ’cause we can’t see eye to eye.
          There ain’t no good guys, there ain’t no bad guys.
          There’s only you and me and we just disagree.”

        • Ourorboros
          Ourorboros
          December 14, 2013 at 7:15 pm | #

          Forgot to say – Amber also left Ethan standing in a world so cold.
          She wants her space, but as far as Ethan knows, the world is rather hostile to gays.
          Although if anybody would get off campus (beyond the beach and the mall) he might find otherwise.

  50. Marc in MN
    Marc in MN
    December 14, 2013 at 1:09 am | #

    Flipping a table seems a bit much….even for college level drama. =P

    • Keroshino
      Keroshino
      December 14, 2013 at 1:39 am | #

      Agreed!

  51. Alex Stritar
    Alex Stritar
    December 14, 2013 at 1:10 am | #

    Eeyup, Ethan sure is dead here. I’d say I feel bad for him, but he does have it coming.

  52. Kiggy
    Kiggy
    December 14, 2013 at 1:11 am | #

    Amber is diplaying in panel 3 what we in the spanish-speaking world call “encojonado/a”….

  53. BayoWolf
    BayoWolf
    December 14, 2013 at 1:26 am | #

    I’m just imagining a Godzilla roar is coming out of Amber’s mouth in panel 3.

    • Jack Finch
      Jack Finch
      December 14, 2013 at 3:50 pm | #

      Fanart of Amberzilla needs to happen

  54. NoHeart
    NoHeart
    December 14, 2013 at 1:30 am | #

    Not gonna lie, this is going far better than i expected. Amber hasn’t began breathing fire

  55. Keroshino
    Keroshino
    December 14, 2013 at 1:33 am | #

    -David Willis on Twitter-
    “Oh hey remember way back when I said that you have eight weeks of mostly wacky hijinks? Yeah, um, the eight weeks is over.”

    • saltchocolate
      saltchocolate
      December 14, 2013 at 10:32 am | #

      I saw that. And I shuddered.

    • xKiv
      xKiv
      December 14, 2013 at 8:05 pm | #

      Hijinks cease.

  56. Mr K
    Mr K
    December 14, 2013 at 1:35 am | #

    It looks like Joyce is staring at Sarah’s rack.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      December 14, 2013 at 2:07 am | #

      It’s cos she misses Billie’s rack.

    • David Willis
      David M Willis
      December 14, 2013 at 2:08 am | #

      How? Her eyes are closed!

      • Keroshino
        Keroshino
        December 14, 2013 at 2:12 am | #

        She’s imitating “Brock” from Pokemon
        …that’s how!

      • taekwondogirl
        taekwondogirl
        December 14, 2013 at 9:29 am | #

        Even if they were open, her face is pointing upwards, so she’d be looking Sarah in the eyes. People have issues following eye paths, apparently.

        • Marc in MN
          Marc in MN
          December 14, 2013 at 10:49 am | #

          Now that I look again, if you think of the blush spots on her cheeks as eyes and her eyes as eyebrows, it’s a pretty freaky face… haha

          • taekwondogirl
            taekwondogirl
            December 14, 2013 at 11:22 am | #

            It’d be a pretty freaky face period if her blush spots were her eyes…

  57. Aizat
    Aizat
    December 14, 2013 at 1:49 am | #

    Amber is either Prowl or Whirl. Oh please let it be Whirl.

    • BumblebeeZ3
      BumblebeeZ3
      December 14, 2013 at 10:04 pm | #

      I’d say Whirl. But I can see Prowl too now that you mention it.

  58. Chico
    Chico
    December 14, 2013 at 2:19 am | #

    Is Ethan going to die?

  59. Captain Jack
    Captain Jack
    December 14, 2013 at 2:27 am | #

    I’ll be honest, it’s hard to like Amber or Ethan right now. Both are hypocrites in that Amber won’t tell Danny who she is and Ethan is refusing to deal with the potential social stigma of being gay.

    Ethan, under considerable pressure from Amber, has at least admitted he’s gay to Joyce. However, he has essentially thrown away all of the help that Amber had given him over the summer, which is just a huge slap in the face to her. Until he finds some self-respect and makes things right, the situation between him and Amber and him and Joyce is only going to get more complicated and probably more awful.

    Amber’s situation is a bit more complicated. I feel she has been nothing but awful to Ethan since the beginning of college, which has only worsened with his recent hijinks. She abandoned him as a friend, leaving him with MIKE as emotional support. I understand that she’s probably emotionally drained from supporting him that summer, but there are probably better ways to deal with that than to binge on WoW and act as a vigilante. Let’s move on to her issues stemming from her father’s abuse. This is something that she needs help with ASAP. SO many of her issues are due to this. If she can start to get help with this, it would definitely help her in a lot of other stuff. I understand that what she’s dealt with her father is absolutely awful, but that doesn’t make it any better when she inflicts her pain on others. Furthermore, her interactions with Danny have been irresponsible. Danny is a complete idiot, but by ‘romancing’ him through two different identities without telling him that she is both is just asking for trouble. Now Danny is going to probably be abandoned by both identities and be VERY confused.

    • Ourorboros
      Ourorboros
      December 14, 2013 at 2:56 am | #

      Amber uses Amazi-Girl as an outlet for the side she feels she cannot safely let out in normal life. She met Danny this way and did most of her bonding in character.
      When we start a relationship, we want to be seen as the best of what we can be, not all that stuff we know/fear ourselves to be. Amber just has an extra layer of ickey-ness there.

      It’s hard enough to open up to another, but it might be harder to reconcile your dark side to another.

    • gangler
      gangler
      December 14, 2013 at 6:14 am | #

      What, no he hasn’t thrown away all the help she gave him. Just because she helped him deal with misery for a while doesn’t mean he’s obligated to be miserable forever. What an incredibly twisted way of looking at things.

      That this aid has been pointedly withdrawn makes it all the more nonoffensive that he’s trying not to put himself in need of it again.

      • taekwondogirl
        taekwondogirl
        December 14, 2013 at 9:31 am | #

        ….He’s going to make himself miserable by dating someone he isn’t romantically or sexually attracted to, and it’s gross that you don’t understand that.

        • gangler
          gangler
          December 14, 2013 at 11:09 am | #

          Of course he is. Of course it’s not gonna work. That’s so not the point. He had a problem. He’s trying to solve it. That doesn’t mean he’s throwing away that help Amber gave him in dealing with that problem.

          • taekwondogirl
            taekwondogirl
            December 14, 2013 at 11:23 am | #

            He isn’t trying to solve it though. His “solving” involves throwing everything that’s a problem under the bed and trying to forget about it.

            • greengeekgirl
              greengeekgirl
              December 14, 2013 at 3:27 pm | #

              I think you’re missing gangler’s point, in that Ethan THINKS he is trying to solve the problem. What he can’t see is what he’s actually doing, which is running away from something that he can’t change.

              My best friend in high school was gay, and he had a terrible time coming to terms with it. When you grow up in an atmosphere where gay = pretty much the worst thing that can happen to you, “solving” your “gay problem” can turn into “figure out a way not to be gay” in your head, because you can’t always quite imagine a world where you would be allowed to openly live as yourself without a significant dose of loathing from the community and from yourself. Ethan probably doesn’t see it the way that Amber does; he sees it through a film of what his parents think and what people in his hometown thought. (I forget where Ethan and Amber are from, but I grew up near where many of these characters are from.. so I’m familiar with the mindset.)

              • Ourorboros
                Ourorboros
                December 14, 2013 at 6:24 pm | #

                Yes, this.
                Ethan isn’t purposely trying to throw away Amber’s help. He’s groping through the issue alone.
                His friends are Mike and Amber. I like Mike, but his help is rough at best. Amber wants her space.

  60. Taurin
    Taurin
    December 14, 2013 at 2:41 am | #

    Uh oh! You can see Amber’s gums! You KNOW she means business!

  61. anonreader1
    anonreader1
    December 14, 2013 at 3:03 am | #

    I just want to shout at her, “SHUT THE FUCK UP! Nobody cares!”

    Seriously, even if Joyce and Ethan are on a slow collision course, it’s their life and their choice to learn from, if they have anything to learn from. Maybe it’ll work out, maybe it won’t.

    • andiemus
      andiemus
      December 14, 2013 at 4:03 am | #

      Nobody cares that he’s totally taking advantage of her? He knows better than to try this kind of shit because he already has. With Amber. And now he’s doing it again.

      • Ourorboros
        Ourorboros
        December 14, 2013 at 4:35 am | #

        Joyce is a willing participant. They are using each other, because she is hiding from her own hang-ups. Given the amount of her self-deception it’s hard to say she is entirely being used as such things are self re-enforcing.

        • rachel
          rachel
          December 14, 2013 at 5:30 am | #

          yeah, doesn’t make it not extremely fucked up

        • taekwondogirl
          taekwondogirl
          December 14, 2013 at 9:36 am | #

          Joyce is a willing participant in something she absolutely doesn’t understand and won’t understand (at least for the time being) because she’s terrified of everything outside of her limited world view. A willful choice made from ignorance while Ethan definitely knows what he’s doing. That’s fucked up, and that sort of mash-up of ignorance and manipulation is why age of consent laws exist.

          • Danny
            Danny
            December 14, 2013 at 10:45 am | #

            I don’t get why some people are so ready to look at certain characters history and psychology and try and understand their actions, rather than judge them, but refuse to do the same for other characters in the cast.

            • taekwondogirl
              taekwondogirl
              December 14, 2013 at 9:01 pm | #

              You can both analyze someone’s history and psychology to understand them and think they’re making a very poor choice. I know precisely why Ethan is doing what he’s doing, I empathize with him completely. He’s in a really unfortunate situation. However, that does not remove culpability from what he’s doing to another person. Nor am I implying by any of this that Joyce is completely faultless in this interaction.

      • gangler
        gangler
        December 14, 2013 at 6:33 am | #

        Taking advantage of her in much the same way that a knife salesman might take advantage of your desire for quality kitchenware at affordable prices. She’s hardly being swindled here.

        • ninja_jesus
          ninja_jesus
          December 14, 2013 at 8:02 am | #

          But he is taking advantage of the fact that appearing to be in a relationship with a woman gives people the impression that you’re straight. In Ethan’s mind, being straight will give him the “normality” he once had, and he associates his homosexuality with all the struggles he had in the recent past. This notion was false from the start, because if he had established that he was gay from the start, and acted as himself the whole time, the normality he sought would’ve been right in front of him, with the included benefits of being accepted by his peers and possibly finding a male partner that he can be satisfied with. Instead, he decided that he could try to bury his past and put up a front so that others can look at him and think, “Hey, he’s straight like me! I don’t need to fear him! I’ll be friends with him!” In doing so, he is compromising the very essence of what a romantic relationship is supposed to be, which is built upon mutual desire, love, and trust; the kind of relationship that Joyce wants to have with someone.

          • gangler
            gangler
            December 14, 2013 at 8:30 am | #

            And the knife salesman takes advantage of the fact that money can be exchanged for goods and services. Neither is in any way a negative thing, so long all parties are fully informed.

            • ninja_jesus
              ninja_jesus
              December 14, 2013 at 8:52 am | #

              Your analogy is flawed in that it fails to take into account the full range of human consciousness. There is way more to this issue than what you’re making it out to be.

            • Heavensrun
              Heavensrun
              December 14, 2013 at 12:36 pm | #

              The difference here is that when things are said and done, the knife salesman has sold you knives. Nothing Ethan does will give her the straight husband she thinks she’s “buying”. He’s gay. He’s -really- gay. He’s incapable of suppressing that. He couldn’t sleep with a girl he legitimately cared for on their prom night. He couldn’t go -one- -fucking- encounter with a cute guy without blowing Joyce off entirely, and the guy was her BROTHER. (Jocelyn’s sexual identity notwithstanding, we’re talking about Ethan’s perceptions at the time)

              Ethan may or may not know better than to believe that he can make this thing with Joyce work. But he SHOULD. The experiences and evidence are RIGHT THERE.

              If we were going to liken this to a knife salesman, I’d liken it more to a huckster that sells low quality knives that chip and dull easily while claiming that they’re Ginsu.

              • John
                John
                December 14, 2013 at 12:48 pm | #

                “I’d like to buy a knife. But I’m afraid of sharp things.”

                “Ah, I have just the knife for you!” *hands Joyce a spoon*

                And it’ll be fine until Joyce decides she’s finally ready to dig into that T-bone she’s been drooling over.

    • taekwondogirl
      taekwondogirl
      December 14, 2013 at 9:34 am | #

      She cares because Ethan is still her friend, and she doesn’t want him to get hurt. Pretty straight-forward and understandable why she’s upset. She’s not handling it correctly at all, but it doesn’t invalidate her point or her concern.

      • Danny
        Danny
        December 14, 2013 at 10:50 am | #

        Is that why she’s reacting like this? Amber told Ethan to tell Joyce he was gay, he did so and they both decided to keep dating.

        Amber might by upset with Ethan for staying in the closet, but she’s flipping her shit because Ethan seems to be happy and relaxed and was sitting with a group of friends (to Amber’s eyes) while Amber is isolated from the only friend she’s made, Danny. I think that Amber is even more angry with herself currently for all the lying and deception in her relationship, and she’s redirecting that anger at Ethan. Why does he get to ostensibly be happy because of the lies he’s telling, while Amber does not? etc etc.

        My point is, Amber’s fury is not righteous, brah

        • taekwondogirl
          taekwondogirl
          December 14, 2013 at 9:02 pm | #

          Yeah, I don’t think she would be this angry if it was just Ethan making stupid decisions.

  62. Raoullefere
    Raoullefere
    December 14, 2013 at 3:19 am | #

    I’m impressed; nobody has tried to blame this on Danny.

    But the night is not over.

    • andiemus
      andiemus
      December 14, 2013 at 4:05 am | #

      Never underestimate the DoA fandom’s ability to blame Danny for other people’s shortcomings.

  63. Andrew
    Andrew
    December 14, 2013 at 3:41 am | #

    Amber you put that table back. It didn’t do anything.

  64. andiemus
    andiemus
    December 14, 2013 at 4:02 am | #

    Strike him down with all your anger.

    • Varangian
      Varangian
      December 14, 2013 at 4:51 am | #

      Peace is a lie; there is only passion.

      • Ourorboros
        Ourorboros
        December 14, 2013 at 7:15 pm | #

        The cake is a lie.

        • Jack Finch
          Jack Finch
          December 14, 2013 at 9:46 pm | #

          What about a peace of cake?

  65. Usayasha
    Usayasha
    December 14, 2013 at 4:32 am | #

    Amber needs to calm down. If she keeps up with these destructive outbursts, then people will start to realize that she’s the secret identity of super hero Sarah Clinton!

  66. Keroshino
    Keroshino
    December 14, 2013 at 4:45 am | #

    Careful amber…you are becoming your father!

  67. Varangian
    Varangian
    December 14, 2013 at 4:50 am | #

    This is the Platonic ideal of “relationship trainwreck”. Right here. Especially, of course, Amber’s third-panel rage.

    …Ethan, considering what you know about Amber, you…you really should’ve been more aware that she’s been walking around covered in the “DO NOT CROSS – A (WO)MAN WITH NOTHING TO LOSE” police tape from the Max Payne box art since she got here.

    You did have a lot to deal with, though. Oh well. You’re going to realize that NOW whether you want to or not.

    • gangler
      gangler
      December 14, 2013 at 5:58 am | #

      What? She’s got plenty to lose. She lives an overall happy life with. She’s got friends. She’s got hobbies. She’s got romance. She’s got academic pursuits. Hell, she’s even got a secret identity. She’s got more to lose than a lot of people ever gain.

      For that matter he’s hardly crossed her. He did exactly as she asked, then he politely informed her of the latest developments in the situation. That she doesn’t agree with his decisions does not mean that he’s acted against her in any way.

      • Varangian
        Varangian
        December 14, 2013 at 7:13 am | #

        …Weeeellll yes, she has or had all those things, but given her development and how things have gone for her, do you think Amber notices that she has them? I would wager that she really, really doesn’t. Especially since things just fell apart with Danny and just yesterday, her father waltzed back into her life and brought out the darkness in her like he’d just discovered the Sith Code. I think to Amber’s eyes, what she has is a world made mostly of shadows and cardboard, and it’s been crumbling quickly the last couple days.

        There’s also the fact she sorely needs emotional/mental support, preferably of a professional variety.

        And um, well, Ethan absolutely did cross her. That spite-kiss with Joyce was pretty intentional, dogg, and while he didn’t expect it to cause a Reapable Whirlwind, he did kind of instigate this. Intention, as they say, isn’t magic, and Ethan may not have intended this as a major offense, but it’s gonna be one.

        • gangler
          gangler
          December 14, 2013 at 7:40 am | #

          Yeah, pretty sure she notices. She noticed she had a friend in Dina today while they discussed social things. Not like she was stuck brooding about how nobody likes her and all that jazz. She clearly notices her academic pursuits. Not like she’s stopped attending her classes because “What’s the point”. She noticed her romance just last night when she saw Danny waiting for her, though she’s certainly stuck on how to navigate that situation right now.

          I’m not seeing this interpretation of her where she’s walking by all the great things in her life not realizing that she’d like to keep them. She’s very much aware of what she has to lose and what she’s in the process of losing.

          As you say intention is not magic. Ethan kissing Joyce was not in any way an act committed upon Amber and as such cannot be considered an act of crossing Amber. You have not crossed somebody simply because they saw something you were doing, ran across the room and made an issue of it. Might as well say Sarah crossed Raidah by making new friends. That Raidah doesn’t like it does not make it an act of crossing.

          • Varangian
            Varangian
            December 14, 2013 at 8:09 am | #

            …I…Erm. Do you really think that all people in a state of extreme psychological distress “brood because no one likes them and all that jazz”? Because if you do, then, well, here is a teachable moment: they don’t. They really don’t, in fact, with much emphasis.

            That’s without even mentioning that seeing Danny isn’t going to remind her of her romance, it’s going to be incredibly unpleasant, because as much as I love the guy, he just all but told her that the only part of her he finds worthwhile is her vigilante identity.

            Y’know, the one she uses as an outlet for pain and rage.

            And finally, while I appreciate that this debacle isn’t all Ethan’s fault–he had no way of knowing about some of it and no real way of changing what he did know about, because Amber’s acting totally on emotion rather than logic–the situation isn’t the same. Ethan kissed Joyce, while glaring at Amber, intending to make a nasty point to her about how he Could make his own decisions, so THERE. Willis confirmed he was looking at Amber quite intentionally!

            Now, does this deserve what he’s getting? Hell no, this is disproportionate retribution at its finest! But he did instigate this, so…he gotta live with it.

            • gangler
              gangler
              December 14, 2013 at 8:29 am | #

              There’s a big difference between “In a state of psychological duress” and “Does not notice the good things in her life”

              She notices she has friends. Plain and simple. She notices she has school. This is cut and dry. She is aware that she has good things in her life which she does not want to lose.

              You yourself said intention is not magic. I will not argue about the meaning of any glares, as they are irrelevant. Any spite or nasty points that were intended do not change the act.

              • Varangian
                Varangian
                December 14, 2013 at 8:37 am | #

                …Well I mean if you want to keep moving the metaphorical goalposts I guess I have no choice but to concede the debate?? :/

                I would think it’s pretty well-documented that people in a state of emotional distress/depression are really fucking bad at noticing the good things in their life–I know when I hit low points I’m pretty sure everyone who loves me resents my existence, but maybe Amber is totally different?????

                And I meant “intention isn’t magic” in terms of Ethan didn’t intend to initiate Amber going fucking nuclear, not that we should discard all emotional provocation, but I mean if you want to twist the meaning who am I to stop you.

                • gangler
                  gangler
                  December 14, 2013 at 8:48 am | #

                  I’ve been using the same goalpost from the beginning. I challenge you to go through my comments and find a point where I said Amber wasn’t in a state of psychological duress.

                  She is however specifically acting to preserve the good things in her life. So again, your whole “Woman with nothing to lose” thing, which I have been arguing against from the beginning, is wrong. Both in the sense that it is factually inaccurate, and also in the sense that Amber doesn’t feel that it is accurate.

                  I legitimately thought you meant that if Ethan didn’t intend for the kiss to be a spiteful thing that wouldn’t change anything. It has been confusing talking to you when on the one hand you say that his spiteful intentions are super important, but on the other hand you say that his intentions could not make the act one nonagression.

                  He didn’t cross a woman with nothing to lose. The crossing portion of that didn’t happen, the woman has plenty to lose and knows it.

      • ninja_jesus
        ninja_jesus
        December 14, 2013 at 7:33 am | #

        Technically speaking, yes, that’s absolutely correct. However, the outcome that she desired was that instead of going back into the closet and having a relationship with a girl that she thinks will most likely not end well, he would finally confront his sexuality and accept himself for who he truly is. Furthermore, she is his closest friend with history and a failed relationship between them, and she doesn’t want to see her friend feign romantic interest just so they can reclaim a false sense of self; in that way, Ethan’s relationship with Joyce is very self-serving.

        On the other hand, Joyce’s part in this relationship is also very self-serving, as she is not emotionally or psychologically ready to handle an actual romantic relationship, but needs an outlet for her self-repressed sexual desires. Ethan, being gay, cannot reciprocate those desires, which means that she won’t have to deal with full-blown sex at all, or have to deal with the pressure of Ethan wanting to have sex with her. She is kept within a safe, sterile environment that leaves her free to explore her own sexuality. On the whole, it’s mostly a win-win situation.

        Or so you would think.

        Ethan has shown sexual desire towards other males, including Jacob and Joyce’s transgendered brother Joshua/Jocelyn. Because Ethan is officially in a “straight relationship” with Joyce, it would be rather rude of him to lose control of his repressed desires and actually hook up with another guy behind Joyce’s back. And because he currently hates being gay, he will probably deny doing so at first before finally admitting to it, making Joyce pissed because she hates liars. In any kind of romantic relationship, cheating is a rather shitty thing to do to someone, and I am sure Joyce will see it as a huge betrayal of trust and have it in her head that she and Ethan actually had a genuine thing going on; however, this is the pressure that Ethan will have to deal with if he is to have a sexually unfulfilling relationship with Joyce.

        On the opposite end, Joyce may actually want to try something sexual, but because she has been told that sex is only for married couples, she will most likely try to get married with Ethan. Technically, this is, in itself, not a bad thing; however, getting married under false pretenses and without genuine, mutual feelings is bad because it undermines the whole concept of what a religious marriage is supposed to be. And even if they do get married, she won’t EVER be able to have any fulfilling sexual experiences with Ethan because, again, he is gay. And because Ethan at that point has become married to Joyce, he also will never have any opportunity to accept his sexuality or have any fulfilling sexual experiences, furthering his self-loathing and increasing the risk of him cheating on Joyce.

        So overall, the benefits for both of them in this relationship is merely a short-term thing, and will eventually lead to shitty situations in the long term. The benefits can never become long term unless Ethan deludes himself even further than he has now. In the end, Joyce will more than likely be the one who benefits the most from the relationship as it is now, as she will probably be more enlightened and experienced for her next relationship.

        Conclusion: Life would most probably be better for Ethan if he merely stayed friends with Joyce and saw a therapist to help him confront and accept his homosexuality. Joyce may not be as well-off, but it would surely be a greater step towards emotional maturity if she let him go and found a straight guy with Ethan’s kindness and understanding.

        • gangler
          gangler
          December 14, 2013 at 8:03 am | #

          Was that meant to reply to the salesman comment?

          Really the only point of that was that Joyce isn’t being victimized here. She’s been informed well enough that it doesn’t fall on the salesman if she regrets the transaction.

          • ninja_jesus
            ninja_jesus
            December 14, 2013 at 8:18 am | #

            No, I’m sure I replied to that one just now. But you really haven’t addressed my arguments in the above comment at all.

            Furthermore, I would argue that no one is really being victimized here; like you said, Ethan and Joyce had an agreement and are acting upon it. However, the decisions they have made could not possibly be considered well-thought out or “good” decisions to the outside observer based on all the variables that the comic has given us. Following them out into their logical possibilities, as I have done so in the above post, is proof of that. There are several other variables that I haven’t even touched upon in my post, such as the religious differences between Ethan and Joyce, and both of their parents’ points of view, all of which help to inform and influence the decisions that these individuals make.

            • gangler
              gangler
              December 14, 2013 at 8:36 am | #

              I’m really not sure how your points relate to anything I said though. The decisions aren’t well thought out or good. This arrangement isn’t going to work and they’re both gonna regret this by the time it’s over.

              It’s not that I disagree with you. I’m just not sure where all this is coming from. I posted a comment about how Amber still has a lot of good things in her life that she wants to preserve and Ethan hasn’t crossed her. You responded to that with a summary of why Ethan’s relationship with Joyce may seem like a good idea but isn’t.

              • ninja_jesus
                ninja_jesus
                December 14, 2013 at 8:45 am | #

                Then I probably just overelaborated on the last sentence of that first paragraph, which I tend to do by accident. My mistake At the least, that whole first paragraph is relevant, lmao.

                • gangler
                  gangler
                  December 14, 2013 at 9:01 am | #

                  Ah, as far as that goes I’d say that choosing a solution other than the one that your helper wanted is also not a slap in the face. Help is genuinely given with the understanding that the problem still belongs to the helpee, and they are free to choose to solve it as they wish without that reflecting poorly on those who have helped.

                  For example, somebody might seek to help a loved one with financial troubles while they pursue their dreams. One should still not get offended if they decide to put their dreams on hold in order to acquire financial stability. Even if one thinks this is a really bad decision, one should remember that both the issue of dream fulfillment and the issue of financial stability belong to the loved one, and they are just trying to do what’s right for them as best they can. They do not owe one financial instability simply because one assisted with that.

                  I appreciate that it can be difficult to watch somebody you helped not get where you wanted them to be, but it’s not a slap in the face. It’s just a shitty thing that’s happening, centered entirely around them and their problems.

                • ninja_jesus
                  ninja_jesus
                  December 14, 2013 at 9:12 am | #

                  I guess it’s just a matter of bias on my part then. I’ve always been taught that loving and accepting yourself is most important if you plan on loving others, so for Ethan to create this fake relationship given the issue of his sexuality and his poor sense of self runs completely contrary to that, lol.

  68. Tenn
    Tenn
    December 14, 2013 at 5:09 am | #

    I think there are enough Amber ragefaces now to start collecting them as a hobby.

  69. Gevaisa
    Gevaisa
    December 14, 2013 at 7:06 am | #

    He’s not in control, as he said he wanted to be back out in front of the pizza place. He’s in denial.

    I think that the religious angle has been ignored here. Ethan isn’t a Christian, he’s Jewish, and he’s only going to church to please Joyce and have fun. He’s not going through a serious crisis of faith and considering conversion. His actions there are all part of his denial and he has not really dealt with anything.

    • begbert2
      begbert2
      December 14, 2013 at 11:05 pm | #

      The reason we’re ignoring the religious angle is because he has no reason to be considering conversion. Failing to do so isn’t denial; it’s normality. People don’t just up and change religions for no reason, and doing so isn’t dealing with things, it’s demonstrating a mercurial and unstable grasp of theology.

      You could argue that he shouldn’t be going to a Christian service at all if he’s not planning to convert, but since every other aspect of his relationship with Joyce is a lie, why shouldn’t he complete the set?

  70. gangler
    gangler
    December 14, 2013 at 7:12 am | #

    This really isn’t how the whole “Let’s take a break and recoup” thing should work.

    You can’t withdraw from all the friend stuff, but still make a point of showing up again whenever you’re pissed off about what they’re doing.

    None of this would even be a surprise to her if she was still hanging out with Ethan. She would’ve been like “How’d the night go. Did Joyce take it alright?” and he would’ve been like “Yeah, she says she can help fix me.” and she would’ve been like “Uhh… and you think that’s a good idea?” and they would’ve talked it out like friends do.

    And, you know that’s understandable if she’s not up for that right now, but if she’s not then she really needs to just let him work through his shit on his own. For both of them, really, since I have to imagine that just showing up to deal with his problems without enjoying the accompanying recreational social interaction is only accelerating her exhaustion rather than providing rest.

    • Varangian
      Varangian
      December 14, 2013 at 7:18 am | #

      See this is all true, but you’re looking at this through the lenses of a rational human being for whom her relationship with Ethan isn’t an open wound she refuses to address, and who isn’t a psychological shipwreck.

      That’s not Amber, right now.

  71. Jack Finch
    Jack Finch
    December 14, 2013 at 7:37 am | #

    I’m wondering how long before the adult layer of this verse decides Amber/Amazi-Girl is a big problem, maybe a bigger problem than IU needs right now. I mean I got hauled in front of the conduct board for a lot less than this.

  72. Crumplepunch
    Crumplepunch
    December 14, 2013 at 7:44 am | #

    Completely on Ethan’s side, here. His relationship is unhealthy in the long term, but like he say, it’s his decision.

    • timemonkey
      timemonkey
      December 14, 2013 at 8:10 am | #

      I agree, I wrote a few big comments about it last night but the site refused to post them.

    • ninja_jesus
      ninja_jesus
      December 14, 2013 at 8:26 am | #

      What ever happened to “Friends don’t let friends make bad decisions that could negatively affect them for the rest of their lives?” 😛 Would you say the same thing about Billie forcing Ruth to give up drinking? That “her bad drinking problem is unhealthy in the long term, but like she says, it’s her decision”? I definitely wouldn’t.

      • NIghtsbridge
        NIghtsbridge
        December 14, 2013 at 8:32 am | #

        If it had been a calm ‘you will regret this, you should stop this, you are letting your mother and social pressures of the world put you into a position where you will be more miserable, please remember that there are people who will love and care for you regardless of your sexual orientation’ then sure, that would work out.

        But Amber is just showing some of her ugly inner rage and flipping a table. It’s not the goal that people are taking issue with, it’s the method.

        • ninja_jesus
          ninja_jesus
          December 14, 2013 at 8:38 am | #

          Pretty sure it was the goal that was being disagreed upon, in this case. Others may be taking issue with her method, and rightfully so I think, but there are also people here who disagree with her goal outright, which is where I disagree with them.

          But I do agree that the emotionally-charged outburst was primarily unwarranted, but it’s understandable given the shit she’s been put through thus far. Not excusable, mind you, but understandable.

        • Nightsbridge
          Nightsbridge
          December 14, 2013 at 10:15 am | #

          Fair enough. And in the end it SHOULD be his decision . . . not telling him that it would lead to suffering and awful would make amber a bad friend. Flipping a table at him might ALSO make her a bad friend. It’s like, different flavors of bad.

      • timemonkey
        timemonkey
        December 14, 2013 at 9:01 am | #

        Friends don’t abandon you to play masked vigilante to work off their rage issues.

        • ninja_jesus
          ninja_jesus
          December 14, 2013 at 9:03 am | #

          Unless I’m mistaken, we don’t know what Ethan’s part was in helping Amber deal with her issues in this continuity, so I think this point is rather moot.

          • timemonkey
            timemonkey
            December 14, 2013 at 8:05 pm | #

            That was a shot at Amber, not Ethan.

      • Kamino Neko
        Kamino Neko
        December 14, 2013 at 11:13 am | #

        I seem to have missed the strip where Ethan and Joyce were planning to drop out of college and get married.

        This is no more going to negatively effect the rest of Ethan’s life (or Joyce’s) than any of the myriad other ill-thought out relationships either of them could be having (and is likely to have in future years) would.

        Is the relationship a good idea? No, it’s not. But, since Ethan and Joyce are both going into it with open eyes – albeit with blinders – it is totally their mistake to make. Amber’s said her peace, and pointed out when he was doing something horrible…now it’s her turn to butt out.

        • David Willis
          David M Willis
          December 14, 2013 at 12:34 pm | #

          you are my favorite

        • Keroshino
          Keroshino
          December 14, 2013 at 2:59 pm | #

          Agreed 100%

    • clodia
      clodia
      December 14, 2013 at 12:29 pm | #

      I agree. I don’t agree with what he’s doing, but it’s his decision. I agree with Amber’s frustration, but I don’t agree with her trying to control him or doing other than saying “I disagree with your position, and am not comfortable being around you while you are going forward with this line of action.” Thing is, she’s already asked for a break from him, so she shouldn’t even do that, just keep avoiding him.

      I understand her anger. I honestly can’t blame her for it. But she needs to deal with it and realize that it’s her problem, not his.

  73. fantasyfreakvi
    fantasyfreakvi
    December 14, 2013 at 8:17 am | #

    I didn’t know that Amber was a Jersey girl… :p

  74. hof1991
    hof1991
    December 14, 2013 at 9:23 am | #

    People are discussing this as if there were a bunch of rational adults involved. This is Ethan, whose life is a confused mess. This is Amber who recently punched her dad, fled her dorm, was rejected by the only person who provided any human contact and whose roommate is Dina. Amber is violent. It is what she knows. She is terribly alone. At this point , Ethan is just the last straw. All this has happened to her in the last few days, though we have had months to comment on it. The strip is Dumbing of Age, so it doesn’t feature adults making wise decisions.

    Is this going to be good for Ethan or Amber? Of course not. It is like me at 18? Sure is.

  75. What was the question again?
    What was the question again?
    December 14, 2013 at 9:35 am | #

    No Amber, don’t give into the anger! That’s just the amazi-girl symbiote talking!

  76. DFS
    DFS
    December 14, 2013 at 10:24 am | #

    I was watching the adventure time episodes “Return to the Nightosphere” and “Daddy’s Little Monster” right before I came in to check in on the wacky world of Willis. Two things: 1) Not so wacky right now, is it? and (2) Amber’s seething rage, color inverted text and red demonic background make me think that she could do a terrific job in the nightosphere.

    $00.02

  77. CianM1301
    CianM1301
    December 14, 2013 at 11:17 am | #

    RUN ETHAN! RUN FOR YOUR LIIIIIFE!!

  78. Tufto
    Tufto
    December 14, 2013 at 11:20 am | #

    Ooh, Amber snaps again. Funky beans.

    • taekwondogirl
      taekwondogirl
      December 14, 2013 at 11:44 am | #

      What has Willis done to me? I saw Funky beans, thought Funky Winkerbean, and then read it as Funky Cancercancer.

      • John
        John
        December 14, 2013 at 12:40 pm | #

        Cancer cancer incest cancer?

  79. Heavensrun
    Heavensrun
    December 14, 2013 at 12:00 pm | #

    Okay, now Amber’s crossed a line for me. The correct response, Amber, is “If you are going to continue to repress your feelings until you snap and break this girl’s heart, we aren’t friends anymore.” Flipping tables is not okay.

    • Doom Shepherd
      Doom Shepherd
      December 14, 2013 at 11:04 pm | #

      Your avatar’s human form did it. 😉

  80. Chiatroll
    Chiatroll
    December 14, 2013 at 12:04 pm | #

    I brought this up in an old one by mistake instead of the new comic people will see.

    Ok. So Amber has a hamburger, or some other kind of burger veggie, chicken ect. Dina and Riley have cereal. Jacob had an apple with his meal or maybe an apple for his meal. What was the yellow mush Ethan has. Pudding? Extra buttery mashed potatos? It’s very important.

    • John
      John
      December 14, 2013 at 12:39 pm | #

      It was a sponge.

    • Random832
      Random832
      December 14, 2013 at 12:40 pm | #

      There’s not a lot of detail – for all we know it’s macaroni and cheese.

      • Chiatroll
        Chiatroll
        December 14, 2013 at 2:05 pm | #

        I hope it’s the mac and cheese and not the sponge. Unless it’s a giant plate of pudding because that is also okay.

  81. Em
    Em
    December 14, 2013 at 12:08 pm | #

    No so sure I like Amber anymore…I get where she’s coming from, and someone NEEDS to have this talk with Ethan…but the violence and screaming is overkill and will probably just make Ethan want to continue doing what he’s doing, as well as destroy the friendship.

    • Ourorboros
      Ourorboros
      December 14, 2013 at 7:29 pm | #

      The truth is people are not always rational or calculating actors in their lives.

  82. TJ Baltimore
    TJ Baltimore
    December 14, 2013 at 12:52 pm | #

    Does anyone have an idea of how much time has passed here since the beginning of school?

    My point it . . . I went to a tiny (~3,400 students), one-stoplight-town, private college in the northern midwest run by a conservative restorationist Christian church with that denomination’s only seminary on campus. Even then, there were openly gay dudes on campus. Not many, but there was the gay white guy, the gay black guy, the gay Asian guy, the lesbian English professor, the lesbian volleyball coach, and a bunch more of us who weren’t so obvious . . .

    Indiana University-Bloomington is about 12.5 times larger. How has Ethan not yet met/seen/heard of other attractive young gay guys on campus? Aren’t there any LBGTQQIA alphabet soup organizations?

    [In other news, Amber-rage is the best kind of rage! Although other commenters disagree with me, every time Amber rages, I fall in love with her a little more.]

    • TJ Baltimore
      TJ Baltimore
      December 14, 2013 at 1:02 pm | #

      P.S. I’m not implying that what Amber is doing would be good for her or Ethan if they were real, living people. It’s kinda like completely not-scripted-at-all drama on “reality” TV

    • Soupy McGee
      Soupy McGee
      December 14, 2013 at 1:15 pm | #

      The description you gave of ” the gay white guy, the gay black guy, the gay Asian guy, the lesbian English professor, the lesbian volleyball coach” sounds like they were meeting a secret quota given to them by church elders that went something like “IF WE GET ONE OF EACH KIND, THEY WON’T NOTICE OUR TRUE GOALS” and on a giant war room screen behind is “OPERATION GEE-HAD (but not the Muslim kind)”

      • TJ Baltimore
        TJ Baltimore
        December 14, 2013 at 2:17 pm | #

        It did kinda feel like that. I didn’t come out until my second year, and the other out gay black guy and out gay white guy came in the following years. (That doesn’t count the closeted gays or those who thought they were closeted but weren’t fooling anyone.)

    • John
      John
      December 14, 2013 at 1:26 pm | #

      It’s been exactly three weeks since move-in day.

      • TJ Baltimore
        TJ Baltimore
        December 14, 2013 at 1:47 pm | #

        Yeah, that’s roughly what I’ve been thinking. I didn’t want to put too much emphasis on what Joyce said about how long she’s been in a relationship, but nearly to double or triple the amount of time? Yikes! (And I couldn’t remember how much of a built-in time lapse, if any, there between Walky discovering pajama-jeans and Walky receiving them from Mike).

      • Kladeos
        Kladeos
        December 14, 2013 at 7:29 pm | #

        That’s about when my university always has its Clubs Night, where you can go find out about organizations on campus, if you missed out during Frosh Week.

        • John
          John
          December 14, 2013 at 8:52 pm | #

          I’ve kind of been wondering about that, because it seems a little odd that with all the variety of characters we’ve got, the only extracurriculars any of them are involved in are Dorothy and Billie with the paper. (And Dorothy’s ditching that to study, while Billie’s… Billie.) Not just no LGBT organizations for Ethan, but no D&MM fan club for Walky or Campus Crusade for Christ for Joyce or Amazi-Girl fan club for Danny or intramural hockey for Ruth (though I guess it wouldn’t be time for that yet anyway) or anything she can cram into her schedule that might look good on a transcript for Dorothy (seriously, I’m not on the Yale admissions board, but I’m thinking the right extracurriculars would help her more than more studying)…

          Judging by IU’s 2013 schedule, though, their club fair has probably already gone by without notice.

  83. D-money
    D-money
    December 14, 2013 at 1:17 pm | #

    No Amber is completely right. Ethan Dumped Her because he was gay. Amber stood by him as a friend and supported him Through. He started dating another Girl. As a friend she told him it wasn’t ok and that he needed to be honest with his new girlfriend. Now he says that he’s going to try to be straight with this new girl instead of her. Instead Of Her. This is not telling you that you are making a huge mistake rage this is Rejection and betrayal rage. Ethan was instrumental in Screwing up her life and in return she was gracious and accepting all through high-school up until college and she realized she needed to spend some time on herself because she was kinda going crazy. Then Ethan stuck a fork in the Crazy and hit a nerve.Amber may not be behaving as someone should but she has every right to act like this. Ethan Deserves Everything he gets.

    • Mr K
      Mr K
      December 14, 2013 at 1:38 pm | #

      Why are random words capitalized? Makes no fucking sense.

      • David Willis
        David M Willis
        December 14, 2013 at 2:41 pm | #

        back away slowly

  84. John
    John
    December 14, 2013 at 1:21 pm | #

    This isn’t really about Ethan being in the closet, or out of the closet, or because Amber thinks Ethan is going to hurt Joyce, or Joyce is going to hurt Ethan. Amber may be irritated at Ethan about those things, and those may be the parts of it that she’s willing to talk about, but that’s not why she’s so pissed that she’s flipping tables.

    The reason she’s that pissed is that Ethan broke off a long-term relationship with her, one that she expected to end with “’til death do we part”, just before they consummated it, by telling her that he was gay and so couldn’t have a relationship with a woman. And then, after she spent the entire summer dealing with the fallout from Ethan coming out – and we got a hint with Amber’s confrontation with Naomi (which was just yesterday for Amber) what that must have been like – and still trying to protect and defend and be friends with her fiancé in all but name who just dumped her ass, they’ve gone away to college, and Mr. “I can’t date you because you’re a woman and I’m gay” is dating a woman who isn’t Amber. And given that kiss and glare, rubbing her face in it.

  85. Rawrr
    Rawrr
    December 14, 2013 at 1:27 pm | #

    This campus must have a GSA. The tiny fundamentalist college in my home town even has a GSA. This huge state school where students are allowed to be out must have one. Someone drag Ethan (and Joyce) there and let Amber get a break from being his only cheerleader.

    It wouldn’t hurt Amber to go and learn a little more about the coming out process and how you really can’t rush somebody with it no matter how incredibly frustrating they’re being, but I think she could stand to spend some time not thinking about Ethan or his issues at all.

    • Jack Finch
      Jack Finch
      December 14, 2013 at 2:16 pm | #

      It wouldn’t hurt Amber to walk past the GSA. wave to Ethan, and keep going until she reached the mental health service IMHO.

    • Ourorboros
      Ourorboros
      December 14, 2013 at 7:34 pm | #

      It’s a Big 10 campus. There has to be a bunch of gay lesbian friendly hangouts on the main drag, a number of students who are already out, and other such things.

      However, Joyce will not go in. She sees gay-ness as something to be saved from. Accepting it would be accepting the Devil. It’s okay to save somebody from the Devil and hide from your own sex fears, but not to take it as normal.
      It would attack her beliefs to directly, causing most to hold on to their beliefs more strongly.

    • Alex Stritar
      Alex Stritar
      December 14, 2013 at 7:46 pm | #

      Well, Ethan has said he doesn’t want people to think of him as ‘the gay guy’, even in a place where people would be more positive about it, so that could be a handwave there, at least for the moment (he’ll probably check such an organization out when he’s more comfortable about his sexuality, though he’d probably rather join a Transformers club or something).

  86. Sir Robin
    Sir Robin
    December 14, 2013 at 1:40 pm | #

    At first I looked forward to Ethan’s ass-kicking, but now I am not so sure … Damn you Willis for messing with my emotions

  87. FuryOfFirestorm
    FuryOfFirestorm
    December 14, 2013 at 2:12 pm | #

    FUCK YO TABLE, ETHAN!

    • ridtom
      ridtom
      December 14, 2013 at 3:08 pm | #

      WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS, TOMATOE SOUP?! FUCK YO TOMATOE SOUP, ETHAN!

  88. Arkadi
    Arkadi
    December 14, 2013 at 2:33 pm | #

    Yeah, “down”… Like, when a ship is down.

  89. lightsabermario
    lightsabermario
    December 14, 2013 at 3:06 pm | #

    Sarah seems to be thinking, “Why are you touching my navel? This is making me a little uncomfortable.”

    • John
      John
      December 14, 2013 at 4:50 pm | #

      Joyce doesn’t have a thing to give Sarah’s tummy, so she has to use her hand.

  90. ridtom
    ridtom
    December 14, 2013 at 3:10 pm | #

    Sure everybody is worried about Ethan and Amber, but no one cares about the poor sap that has to clean that mess up. No one cares about the middle guy.

  91. ganon
    ganon
    December 14, 2013 at 5:01 pm | #

    fourth eh

  92. joegkushner
    joegkushner
    December 14, 2013 at 5:17 pm | #

    Ethan gives Amber a hug just in time for his g/f to walk back in on him. wacky threesome sex insures.

  93. Fen_Star
    Fen_Star
    December 14, 2013 at 5:23 pm | #

    This is why you are stuck with shitty plastic plates. Corelle stuff is fairly sturdy, but it is no match for amber’s rage.

  94. Bill
    Bill
    December 14, 2013 at 5:31 pm | #

    Flipping a table is a little over the top, and guaranteed to attract attention to the table-flipper.  So why is everybody else in the dining room not staring at Amber and Ethan?

  95. Tealjoy
    Tealjoy
    December 14, 2013 at 6:08 pm | #

    This got extremely dangerous, extremely fast. You better run.

  96. Gargamel
    Gargamel
    December 14, 2013 at 6:31 pm | #

    Aww cute, this little girl is growing up to be just like daddy.

  97. Gold
    Gold
    December 14, 2013 at 7:07 pm | #

    Now, how can we pin this on Danny?

    • xKiv
      xKiv
      December 14, 2013 at 9:06 pm | #

      He could have noticed that Amber=AG, not dumped her, and therefore she would be mentally in a better place. That could at least result in fewer flipped tables.

      • Jack Finch
        Jack Finch
        December 14, 2013 at 10:27 pm | #

        Or she could have told him. Call me crazy.

        • begbert2
          begbert2
          December 14, 2013 at 11:07 pm | #

          Wait, are you implying that Amber is responsible for her own actions and might actually bear partial responsibility for their outcomes? That’s crazy talk. We all know that Danny’s responsible for every bad thing that ever happens in Dumbiverseville.

  98. Prime Spinosaur
    Prime Spinosaur
    December 14, 2013 at 10:04 pm | #

    You either die a hero, or live long enough to see yourself become the villain. It’s obvious that Amber’s starting the decent of the fallen hero. She is going the way of Sayaka.

  99. oldFart
    oldFart
    December 14, 2013 at 11:07 pm | #

    Chabudai gaeshi!

  100. CC
    CC
    December 14, 2013 at 11:12 pm | #

    Flipping a table is not the correct answer.

    But I know from (repeated!) personal experience that investing that much emotional energy in someone, only to have them shit all over it and RUB IT IN YOUR GODDAMN FACE is infuriating to the point of bloodlust. Even if the person isn’t being a shit, watching a friend make a decision that can only end in tears and/or not fixing a glaring problem is horrible in how helpless it makes you feel to save this person you care about from themselves. And given her super alter-ego, that has to be especially horrible for Amber!

    It’s ultimately Ethan’s choice to ruin his life. But he’s just being goddamn petty right now. And being petty to a person who has the the history she has, who fought for you in the way Amber has, in a way you know would hurt them a lot (also known as gaslighting), is stupid beyond belief.

    I’m not trying to say Amber is totally in the right here. Flipping tables is not how you deal with anything that isn’t an actively burning table, and ultimately she CAN’T control what Ethan does. But Ethan is being amazingly gross and self-centered right now.

  101. zadesumagu
    zadesumagu
    December 14, 2013 at 11:21 pm | #

    holy crapp amber !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  102. Plume
    Plume
    December 15, 2013 at 12:01 am | #

    Don’t worry citizens. Under normal circumstances Amber’s table flipping rampage would probably seriously injure someone (Ethan) but before that happens I’m sure the day will be saved once again with the arrival of the mysterious and heroic Amazi-gi…oh….uhhhh…. RUN ETHAN RUN!!!!!!!

  103. OmegaDez
    OmegaDez
    December 16, 2013 at 10:32 am | #

    Flipping tables never gets old.

  104. ubun7u43v3r
    ubun7u43v3r
    January 27, 2014 at 2:18 pm | #

    Gravatar’d!

  105. Akahane
    Akahane
    March 10, 2015 at 2:08 am | #

    Amber, not cool man o.O

  106. DarkoNeko
    DarkoNeko
    April 14, 2015 at 9:45 pm | #

    *shiver*

  107. Rheios
    Rheios
    May 18, 2015 at 4:22 pm | #

    I wrote this starting off making the joke “I didn’t know Jesus was a transformer”, because of the table flipping. But then I envisioned a transformer Joyce would love. A van thing, like for a parade, with a giant crucifix coming off the top that transforms into Jesus. That thought distracted me largely from the original joke because…well mostly I just wish I could draw it and send it to Willis…

Who's that guy over there?

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