Dumbing of Age Book Eleven

Dumbing of Age

A college webcomic by David Willis
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September 20, 2023

Weird

by David M Willis on December 23, 2013 at 12:01 am
  • 01 - The Only Dope For Me Is You

└ Tags: amber, danny, ethan, sal

Discussion (339) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. Ourorboros
    Ourorboros
    December 23, 2013 at 12:01 am | #

    But is she able to buy Twinkies now?

    • Jen Aside
      Jen Aside
      December 23, 2013 at 12:02 am | #

      She just remembered she never got them and is going NOW!

      • Jay Eff
        Jay Eff
        December 23, 2013 at 12:03 am | #

        And some Zebra Cakes, too, for good measure!

        • Tunaro
          Tunaro
          December 23, 2013 at 12:05 am | #

          The trauma has probably made her unable to enjoy the blissful awesomeness that is Hostess ever since. 🙁

          • Sageress
            Sageress
            December 23, 2013 at 12:15 am | #

            Those seven months where they were off the market were the best of her life

      • Ourorboros
        Ourorboros
        December 23, 2013 at 12:04 am | #

        You can get them deep fried now. As long as she’s past the judgment of others.

        • Robert
          Robert
          December 23, 2013 at 12:10 am | #

          Mmmmmm twinkies.*Gurgle*

    • Doctor_Who
      Doctor_Who
      December 23, 2013 at 12:06 am | #

      Maybe Twinkies are Amazi-Girl’s kryptonite. Whenever she sees one she has flashbacks and freaks out.

      • The Candyman
        The Candyman
        December 23, 2013 at 9:49 am | #

        I’m not sure whether that qualifies for “lamest weakness ever” or not. There are probably lamer ones.

        • hmrc4evr
          hmrc4evr
          December 23, 2013 at 10:41 am | #

          Bolt’s ‘weakness’ was styrofoam packing peanuts. So…yea.

        • Lel
          Lel
          December 23, 2013 at 10:54 pm | #

          Powergirl’s weakness is all non-processed materials. Any material at all, that’s all natural, is her weakness.
          They never explain how she isn’t always incapacitated by the air/ground.

      • Pat
        Pat
        December 23, 2013 at 12:46 pm | #

        The commercials imply that only works on villains.

      • Chris
        Chris
        October 11, 2014 at 2:49 am | #

        She needs to be tied up, or she’ll tilt her head, am REMEMBER.

  2. Tunaro
    Tunaro
    December 23, 2013 at 12:01 am | #

    That… did not go quite how I expected…

    • kagato23
      kagato23
      December 23, 2013 at 12:03 am | #

      She was already in run away mode. This just accelerated it.

      • Ourorboros
        Ourorboros
        December 23, 2013 at 12:07 am | #

        They were kind of a bumper in the pinball game of her life.
        Terrible analogy, but they changed her heading and added velocity.
        I’m just curious who, if anybody, calms her down. Maybe she just climbs back into her shell.
        After all, the only other person who probably knows the story is Mike.

        I wouldn’t be terribly surprised if Blaine stopped the robbery. Not because he has any goodness, but because he isn’t putting up with another little girl delaying him. Smack around Sal, swear, leave.

        • Tunaro
          Tunaro
          December 23, 2013 at 12:10 am | #

          Sal has a knife and badassness. Blaine would see her and hit the bricks as fast as possible.

          • John
            John
            December 23, 2013 at 1:06 am | #

            Eh. Dude’s a megalomaniac and an asshole, not a coward. He’s overconfident and doesn’t respect ladies. I’d guess that he’d assume he could take a little girl, knife or no knife.

            He might be right. He fights like an idiot, but Sal doesn’t seem to know what she’s doing either, and while she’s got a knife, Blaine’s got probably at least a foot and a hundred pounds on Sal here, and is likely way more comfortable with hitting little girls than Sal is with what she’s doing.

            • insomniac
              insomniac
              December 23, 2013 at 1:18 am | #

              Yeah, but… the girl with the knife might lose, but the guy without the knife is likely to REALLY wish he didn’t get into a fight with a girl with a knife.

              • Ourorboros
                Ourorboros
                December 23, 2013 at 2:06 am | #

                I once disarmed a kid (I was a kid at the time) my size who had a baseball bat. Didn’t get touched.
                Third time did make me rethink leaving him unscathed though.

                Blaine is overconfident. Sal is scared. That can easily result in Sal losing. Remember, this is about her mommy issues, not being badass.

                • Pat
                  Pat
                  December 23, 2013 at 12:50 pm | #

                  A baseball bat is only dangerous if your foe can manage a swing, and even then you might not really get hurt. A knife is dangerous if you touch it wrong, even if it’s just sitting there and not being wielded by an enemy.

                • Ourorboros
                  Ourorboros
                  December 23, 2013 at 6:10 pm | #

                  @Pat,
                  He did swing.
                  A lot of things deflect knives, cheap ones aren’t sharp and need some velocity on them just like bats.

              • John
                John
                December 23, 2013 at 3:27 am | #

                Yeah, it violates the First Rule of Knife-Fighting, which is: Do not get in a fucking knife fight! They tend not to have winners, just degrees of loser.

                • Lel
                  Lel
                  December 23, 2013 at 10:50 pm | #

                  Considering all the ways you can bleed out within seconds from tiny little gashes, this advice is perfect. It doesn’t take a trained killer to prick you in an artery they didn’t know existed and leave you with a few precious minutes to live.
                  Don’t get in fucking knife fights.

        • Jack Finch
          Jack Finch
          December 23, 2013 at 6:53 am | #

          Call me crazy, but I think Ruth would be a good person for Amber right now.

  3. Mr. Random
    Mr. Random
    December 23, 2013 at 12:01 am | #

    Is she gonna be okay?

    • Izzy
      Izzy
      December 23, 2013 at 12:02 am | #

      Why do you care, you thug!?

    • Tunaro
      Tunaro
      December 23, 2013 at 12:04 am | #

      She’ll be okay after Amazi-Girl finishes putting someone in a coma tonight. Ya know, sorta.

      • JebJeb
        JebJeb
        December 23, 2013 at 12:09 am | #

        She’ll be getting a workout tonight.

        • flamelordkay
          flamelordkay
          December 23, 2013 at 1:24 am | #

          That comment made with that avatar cracks me up.

          • Arkantos
            Arkantos
            December 23, 2013 at 10:23 am | #

            Yeah, and one of the parties involved is going to be sore in the morning.

            • GrimFD
              GrimFD
              December 23, 2013 at 10:47 pm | #

              That is two for two …. Nice.

  4. Doctor_Who
    Doctor_Who
    December 23, 2013 at 12:01 am | #

    No fight scene? Probably for the best.

    • Aizat
      Aizat
      December 23, 2013 at 12:11 am | #

      Yeah, I wanted to see Amber beat the snot out of Sal.

      • timemonkey
        timemonkey
        December 23, 2013 at 12:13 am | #

        And then she’d get expelled and never show up again.

        • Mr K
          Mr K
          December 23, 2013 at 12:17 am | #

          She can go to jail. Where she’ll make friends with Malaya.

        • Ourorboros
          Ourorboros
          December 23, 2013 at 1:02 am | #

          That’s what I was figuring. If there was a fight, it means suspension at best, expulsion at worst along with an arrest.
          I’m expecting a catatonic, fetal rocking position soon though.
          Or maybe Blaine is still outside and she just totally unloads. Seems to be a common enough fantasy here.

          • Mr. Random
            Mr. Random
            December 23, 2013 at 10:55 am | #

            I seriously think they’d rather send her to therapy. Any stranger could see she’s having a breakdown. We know why, but picture a crying woman running in, staring at someone for actual seconds, then screaming and either running away, or towards them in a rage.

            No matter what, you’re going to think, something might be wrong.

            • Ourorboros
              Ourorboros
              December 23, 2013 at 6:13 pm | #

              For fighting the therapy would include suspension.
              Realistically, if and when people break down like that taking a full semester of classes isn’t so viable.
              There are on campus services, but make contact on another person and it will still be a police matter.

              Unless it is campus rape, especially by a “student” athlete. Then it will get buried.

      • Sageress
        Sageress
        December 23, 2013 at 12:14 am | #

        Are you so sure she’d win?

        Not that I’m biased by my gravatar or anything.

  5. Jen Aside
    Jen Aside
    December 23, 2013 at 12:01 am | #

    BOOBGRAB

    • John
      John
      December 23, 2013 at 12:04 am | #

      That’s why Amber thought Ethan was straight!

      • Sageress
        Sageress
        December 23, 2013 at 12:14 am | #

        “QUICK AMBER, WE NEED TO HIDE! THAT CLOSET LOOKS NICE.”

        • Aizat
          Aizat
          December 23, 2013 at 12:24 am | #

          Amber: I thought that was literal at first.

        • insomniac
          insomniac
          December 23, 2013 at 1:20 am | #

          So nice that, when he leaves, he wants to go back!

  6. Mr K
    Mr K
    December 23, 2013 at 12:01 am | #

    Aww, she can’t admit her huge lust for Sal.

    • DinoNuggets
      DinoNuggets
      December 23, 2013 at 1:27 am | #

      Sal/Amber love story incoming?

      • Mr K
        Mr K
        December 23, 2013 at 5:01 pm | #

        Yup. I really hope that Sal and Amber become a superhero love duo. I wonder what Sal’s costume will look like.

        • asmcint
          asmcint
          December 23, 2013 at 9:22 pm | #

          I dunno, but more than one person will be upset if THAT one doesn’t have a chest window.

  7. shadowcell
    shadowcell
    December 23, 2013 at 12:01 am | #

    that actually went better than expected

  8. Ourorboros
    Ourorboros
    December 23, 2013 at 12:02 am | #

    Anyways, so now Danny thinks Amber’s jealous?

    • Mr K
      Mr K
      December 23, 2013 at 12:03 am | #

      Yeah, who wouldn’t be jealous of someone who’s dating Sal? See what I did there?

    • Sageress
      Sageress
      December 23, 2013 at 12:06 am | #

      To be fair, one’s mind wouldn’t automatically jump to “Amber ran away from me and this girl… perhaps this girl has in the past traumatized her!”

    • Luzahn
      Luzahn
      December 23, 2013 at 12:10 am | #

      I don’t know, that looks like legitimate concern to me.

    • timemonkey
      timemonkey
      December 23, 2013 at 12:14 am | #

      She just ran in front of him in tears, stared and ran away. He can see she was upset even before she saw them.

      • Sageress
        Sageress
        December 23, 2013 at 12:16 am | #

        Danny is known for being very perceptive, after all.

        • taekwondogirl
          taekwondogirl
          December 23, 2013 at 12:19 am | #

          He is, actually. He just doesn’t know what to do with the information he takes in.

          • Sageress
            Sageress
            December 23, 2013 at 12:22 am | #

            He thinks Sal is Amazi-Girl because she uses Wiggler in Mario Kart he is literally the least perceptive human being in this comic or any other.

            Nice kid otherwise though.

            • Baker
              Baker
              December 23, 2013 at 12:39 am | #

              I fully expect him to think that seeing him with Sal was too much for her. It’s actually a sort of sensible conclusion, guessing that she had a past history with Sal that was some form of one sided trauma is very out there by comparison.

              What will he do about it though? Is he going to pay her a visit?

              • Ourorboros
                Ourorboros
                December 23, 2013 at 1:05 am | #

                That’s what I was figuring.
                He thinks this is about his blow-up after parent’s weekend and seeing him with Amazi-Sal.

            • taekwondogirl
              taekwondogirl
              December 23, 2013 at 1:17 am | #

              Didn’t I just say he doesn’t know what to do with his perceptions? Also, he initially didn’t trust Sal’s appearance but Billie straight up told him that she rooms with Amazi-Girl and implied that she had seen Amazi-Girl leave in costume. Just means Danny’s gullible and more likely to trust someone else’s observations than his own? I’d guess he’s likely to second guess his own because he never makes a good conclusion from them thus he’s always wrong.

              • Jarid Scott
                Jarid Scott
                December 23, 2013 at 1:44 am | #

                So the lesson here is Billie is stupider than Danny.

                • taekwondogirl
                  taekwondogirl
                  December 23, 2013 at 2:30 am | #

                  I don’t know if “stupider” is a correct conclusion. Billie believes what she wants to believe, and shoehorns data in to support it. Basically, she reaches a conclusion then looks for evidence.

                  …Okay, maybe a bit stupid.

                • John
                  John
                  December 23, 2013 at 12:19 pm | #

                  Well, Billie’s operating on a lot less information than Danny. She’s reached a conclusion that’s pretty logical, except for being completely wrong, and the brain tends to edit memory to fit expectations (this is part of how it builds a coherent world model out of not really enough data to do it). And, yeah, okay, maybe she’s not all that bright. (“Stupidly overconfident” would probably be more accurate.)

                  But I’d be a lot less harsh in my judgment of Danny if he’d spent as little time around Amber/Amazi-Girl as Billie has. Or had any reason at all to believe she’s not just trolling him with the “Sal is Amazi-Girl” thing.

                • taekwondogirl
                  taekwondogirl
                  December 23, 2013 at 12:47 pm | #

                  I think the problem here is that Willis is using the “Clark Kent glasses” trope a bit with Danny, which is a suspension of disbelief that doesn’t necessarily match up with the otherwise realistic tone of his comic. He has done comedic things that wouldn’t actually work in real life elsewhere in DoA, but it’s hard to remember because they’re pretty sporadic.

                  Danny not figuring out Amazi-Girl is Amber is like Mike blatantly punching Joe in the face in a restaurant without any consequences, with Joyce joining in. That couldn’t actually happen in real life.

                • Pat
                  Pat
                  December 23, 2013 at 1:01 pm | #

                  “She’s reached a conclusion that’s pretty logical, except for being completely wrong…”
                  Except that she’s discarded information that proves her conclusion wrong, due to it being inconvenient. Namely that Sal and Amazi-Girl look and sound completely different.
                  Not only that, but she dismissed those facts when Joyce and Danny pointed them out to her.

    • Marisa Mockery
      Marisa Mockery
      December 23, 2013 at 12:33 am | #

      Yeah, because the world revolves around him, doesn’t it…..

      • begbert2
        begbert2
        December 23, 2013 at 2:02 am | #

        Yeah, like you don’t see the world from a position directly behind your own eyes.

        Or at least, that’s what people keep telling me happens to other people. From my experience the entire world exists centered around my own position, with things being harder to perceive the more distant they are from me. (And even harder when there are walls in the way.)

        • Rex Hondo
          Rex Hondo
          December 23, 2013 at 4:58 am | #

          Personally, I see my life from an isometric view. It did make learning to walk a little more challenging, but the storytelling more than makes up for it.

          You kids and your first-person perspective lives. It’s not all about the graphics, you know.

          • Sageress
            Sageress
            December 23, 2013 at 11:08 am | #

            My life, personally, takes place from a 2D Sidescrolling view. I’ve been walking in a straight line my whole life. I don’t know what’s to my right. Send help.

            • Jen Aside
              Jen Aside
              December 23, 2013 at 12:52 pm | #

              Top-down shooting, motherfuckers! *has unlimited ammo*

              • Carlos
                Carlos
                December 23, 2013 at 8:17 pm | #

                My life is an RTS. this person “Carlos” is simply one of the many Nerd units I produced from my Computer lab structure.

      • Pat
        Pat
        December 23, 2013 at 1:02 pm | #

        They actually did upset each other. He knows this.
        Now she looks at him and then runs away.

        “This has to do with me” is a perfectly reasonable conclusion.

  9. KingMabel
    KingMabel
    December 23, 2013 at 12:02 am | #

    Brain…can’t…handle…must…must escape…reality…. must find…hap…happpy place…..

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      December 23, 2013 at 12:32 am | #

      Need booze… lots of booze.

      • Khrene Cleaver
        Khrene Cleaver
        December 23, 2013 at 6:50 am | #

        CALM Azula!?

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          December 23, 2013 at 7:26 pm | #

          See, even Azula knows how to chill out. 😀

  10. David Herbert
    David Herbert
    December 23, 2013 at 12:02 am | #

    I’m torn on there not being a smack down.

    • Sensedog
      Sensedog
      December 23, 2013 at 12:04 am | #

      I was actually hoping for one in this case. Sal may not have considered that her past actions have left a mark on someone else’s life.

      • Ourorboros
        Ourorboros
        December 23, 2013 at 1:07 am | #

        It’s because Walky was the favorite, damn it!
        Yeah, Sal really isn’t at the point where she would think of the effect on others. To be fair she is only 18 and superhero vigilante isn’t the most obvious place to go.

        • Sensedog
          Sensedog
          December 23, 2013 at 9:20 am | #

          Haha, ok. But really, I can’t buy into the “Walky was the favorite” argument. True or not, I somehow doubt that he was the one who forced Sal to commit the crime. Yes, he might have been insensitive to her feelings, but that doesn’t make him responsible for her actions. She made her own decision.

          • DSL
            DSL
            December 23, 2013 at 9:49 am | #

            You don’t have to buy into someone else’s excuse to acknowledge it as a motivator of their actions.

          • Kladeos
            Kladeos
            December 23, 2013 at 4:39 pm | #

            Something like this was a cry for attention – from her parents. Walky was just the distraction, I guess. If deliberately insensitive.

          • Ourorboros
            Ourorboros
            December 23, 2013 at 6:21 pm | #

            Sal forced Sal to rob because she felt Walky was getting all the attention.
            Walky wasn’t an active part in this, nor has anybody implied that.

            Sal was acting on her feelings. Walky was insensitive only in the sense that he didn’t notice. He hasn’t been conscienciously getting close to mom, too him life was what it was. As we see, on his own he only wants to do his stuff and leaves everything else alone.

    • Sageress
      Sageress
      December 23, 2013 at 12:07 am | #

      I just wanna know who’d win.

      • Doctor_Who
        Doctor_Who
        December 23, 2013 at 12:10 am | #

        The audience.

        • begbert2
          begbert2
          December 23, 2013 at 2:04 am | #

          Particularly if robin shows up with a pudding vat.

          …what? It’s not without vaguely irrelevant precedent.

    • LiamAldam
      LiamAldam
      December 23, 2013 at 12:14 am | #

      Give it a few days/months.

      • OctopusGardener
        OctopusGardener
        December 23, 2013 at 11:35 am | #

        ElectaBuzz Lightyear?

  11. Aizat
    Aizat
    December 23, 2013 at 12:02 am | #

    For Amber, the day Sal robbed that convenience store is the one of the darkest day for her. For Sal, it’s only Tuesday.

    • Sageress
      Sageress
      December 23, 2013 at 12:05 am | #

      OF COURSE.

    • John
      John
      December 23, 2013 at 12:06 am | #

      I’m thinking it was one of Sal’s darkest days, too. She just didn’t realize that Amber was there for it.

      • saltchocolate
        saltchocolate
        December 23, 2013 at 12:28 am | #

        Thank you, John. I mean, why does Amber get to be the only one here with a backstory? Sal was not born to rob.

        • Mr K
          Mr K
          December 23, 2013 at 12:35 am | #

          When she came out of the womb, she took the nurse’s wallet.

      • Sageress
        Sageress
        December 23, 2013 at 12:43 am | #

        It was a Street Fighter joke, you know.

        • Ourorboros
          Ourorboros
          December 23, 2013 at 1:06 am | #

          From the only person who could act in the movie.

        • John
          John
          December 23, 2013 at 1:09 am | #

          Of course. That doesn’t mean I can’t dispute its applicability.

        • insomniac
          insomniac
          December 23, 2013 at 1:35 am | #

          “This is a man who knew he was dying and decided to make his own eulogy by levitating 2 meters off the ground and firing lightning into Jean-Claude Van Damme, just so that his kids could watch. He was such a brilliant beacon of intensity that he made a wish for children when he was the one who was dying, and the result still brightens the world today.”

          (taken from Luke McKinney http://www.cracked.com/blog/the-4-best-moments-in-worst-movies-ever-made_p2/#ixzz2oHFUj0RQ)

          • Rex Hondo
            Rex Hondo
            December 23, 2013 at 4:59 am | #

            That article was the most beautiful thing (by a freaking mile) to come out of that movie.

          • Ourorboros
            Ourorboros
            December 23, 2013 at 6:22 pm | #

            I’ve read that article before. It’s true, beyond the money that he would have made to leave behind. The only reason for an actor of that caliber to be in such a movie without a career destroying scandal was for his kids.

      • Aizat
        Aizat
        December 23, 2013 at 3:48 am | #

        Sure, Sal has her dark days…just not that particular day.

  12. Wonder Wig
    Wonder Wig
    December 23, 2013 at 12:03 am | #

    That fifth panel… I now know all….

  13. otusasio451
    otusasio451
    December 23, 2013 at 12:03 am | #

    I’m just happy she didn’t attack Sal in a fit of pure fury and rage the likes of which the world has never seen.

    • JebJeb
      JebJeb
      December 23, 2013 at 12:06 am | #

      Wait until nighttime. Amazi-Girl mostly comes out at night. Mostly.

      • Sageress
        Sageress
        December 23, 2013 at 12:09 am | #

        Exactly. Amber would never be able to get to Sal once Sal is in her Amazi-Girl persona.

  14. Keroshino
    Keroshino
    December 23, 2013 at 12:04 am | #

    Sal…you really don’t remember, do you?

    • Aaron S.
      Aaron S.
      December 23, 2013 at 12:05 am | #

      I’m not sure Sal ever stopped to realize how her actions that day might have affected the strangers in the store. I doubt she even remembers what any of them look like.

      • taekwondogirl
        taekwondogirl
        December 23, 2013 at 12:26 am | #

        I don’t know if she even saw Ethan and Amber to begin with.

        • Ess
          Ess
          December 23, 2013 at 12:47 am | #

          Exactly. It doesn’t really look like she even bothered with them. She went for the atm and the shelves, as far as we’re yet aware. Why was this so traumatising for her, other than being spooked? It doesn’t look like anyone was ACTUALLY hurt and no one specifically came after her or Ethan (yet) and as far as we’re yet aware, the clerk is also unharmed. It was just a stick-up, and as far as can yet be seen, it ended either in her being apprehended or escaping (with nachitos?), so why is this such a huge personal deal to Amber? Is it just that she was so anxious that she couldn’t handle it? It’s really not much of a backstory.

          • Rex Hondo
            Rex Hondo
            December 23, 2013 at 12:56 am | #

            For a normal person, being involved involved in a violent confrontation, even at the fringes, can be a traumatizing experience. For somebody like Amber, who already had a U-Haul load of emotional baggage…?

            • Ess
              Ess
              December 23, 2013 at 1:03 am | #

              Yes, but for the superhero Sal really tries to be, it further shows how ridiculous the whole machination of her alter-ego it. It’s just a mess of a kid running around self-righteously and dealing badly with her emotions, for everyone else to bear the brunt of. The idea that she’s helping, virtuous, benevolent, strong or helpful (consider her role in what happened to Joyce, or lack thereof) is a joke. If this is all that it took to tip her over like this, then a crybaby muggle is kidding herself.

              That’s sort of the point though, isn’t it? Poor baby girl. I hope she goes for help.

              • taekwondogirl
                taekwondogirl
                December 23, 2013 at 1:20 am | #

                “for the superhero Sal really tries to be” uuh, do you mean Amber?

                Also, kinda screw you for saying she’s a crybaby. She lives with an abusive father who abuses her mom, constantly belittles her emotionally and she’s developed a lot of social issues. If you can’t put all the pieces of someone’s puzzle together and fully understand the position they’re coming from, you should maybe not talk about how they are weak for losing their shit over one particular incident.

                • David Willis
                  David M Willis
                  December 23, 2013 at 3:18 am | #

                  don’t have children ess

                  or friends

                • ninja_jesus
                  ninja_jesus
                  December 23, 2013 at 5:05 am | #

                  @David:

                  or life

          • Carlos
            Carlos
            December 23, 2013 at 8:35 pm | #

            I think it’s on of those fear-turns-to-anger deals. She seemed to always have trouble controlling her fears and anxieties and then this whole robbery bit happens and she couldn’t even move. From her perspective, someone COULD have gotten hurt and she wouldn’t have been able o do anything about it, just like at home when Blaine is abusive to her mom. This would thereby explain her compulsive vigilante coping mechanism as a method of taking control so that no one gets hurt, if she can help it, ever again.

    • Aizat
      Aizat
      December 23, 2013 at 12:06 am | #

      For Sal, it’s just Tuesday.

      • RandomNameGen
        RandomNameGen
        December 23, 2013 at 10:05 am | #

        What an amazing reference. Sal= Bison ? Awesome.

    • KingMabel
      KingMabel
      December 23, 2013 at 12:07 am | #

      Do you expect Sal to remember every place the held up? Let alone one specific girl who she may have traumatized?

      • Sageress
        Sageress
        December 23, 2013 at 12:08 am | #

        Did she hold up more than one store?

        • Jack Finch
          Jack Finch
          December 23, 2013 at 12:09 am | #

          Two is the number that’s been mentioned.

        • Jon P
          Jon P
          December 23, 2013 at 12:11 am | #

          I think Walky made reference to “hold up a few convenience stores” in an early comic. [gets out Book 1]

        • luxlucis
          luxlucis
          December 23, 2013 at 12:12 am | #

          2, was it? I’m pretty sure Walky said more than one (like, he said an actual number) at the beginning.

        • Aziraphale
          Aziraphale
          December 23, 2013 at 12:14 am | #

          Two stores. On one hand, it’s not unimaginable she’d remember. On the other, she seems more self-absorbed than self-aware, so it wouldn’t be surprising if she’s never given a thought to anyone else who was there that day.

    • Sageress
      Sageress
      December 23, 2013 at 12:08 am | #

      Well, how would she remember the face of one girl who was in the background of a store she robbed years ago, let alone know what she’d look like 5 years later?

  15. Mr K
    Mr K
    December 23, 2013 at 12:04 am | #

    You didn’t get in a catfight, Amber. Daughter, I am Disappoint.

    • taekwondogirl
      taekwondogirl
      December 23, 2013 at 12:27 am | #

      Can you maybe not be creepy and act like violence is sexy when it’s two women please? That’d be great.

      • Mr K
        Mr K
        December 23, 2013 at 12:47 am | #

        Sorry.

        • taekwondogirl
          taekwondogirl
          December 23, 2013 at 1:21 am | #

          Thank you.

          • Leah Rockshard
            Leah Rockshard
            December 23, 2013 at 1:24 am | #

            Taekwondogirl, every post you make makes me respect you more. Just wanted to say that.

            • taekwondogirl
              taekwondogirl
              December 23, 2013 at 10:32 am | #

              Thank you. 🙂

      • Ess
        Ess
        December 23, 2013 at 12:48 am | #

        LIKE +1

      • begbert2
        begbert2
        December 23, 2013 at 6:04 am | #

        Out of curiosity, is it okay to like violence/fighting/action with women protagonists if you’re not into it for the supposed sexiness? (I’m aware that ‘catfight’ could be interpreted as desiring sexiness, but I don’t really read the word that way myself. The impression I get is that most real ‘catfights’ are frighteningly brutal. It’s as if women don’t have an unwritten ‘below the belt’ rule or something.)

        • taekwondogirl
          taekwondogirl
          December 23, 2013 at 10:34 am | #

          If you can sub in a guy into the situation and you would still like the action sequence and/or it isn’t sexual for you, I’d say it’s fine to enjoy it. However, the discussion of whether we have an unhealthy obsession with violence is still waiting on the other side of the door. :p

          I’d almost wager women are more brutal because they have less experience fighting, so they don’t know *how* to control themselves. I am clearly just guessing and have no actual idea.

          • kurodansei
            kurodansei
            December 23, 2013 at 11:48 am | #

            Taekwondo girl has no idea how girls fight? that’s odd.
            +1 for asserting your opinion
            -1 for telling ppl what they can/should and should not enjoy.
            I for one find cat fights sexy. I also know some females who find male vs male fighting sexy. It’s just a personal preference. For me it’s an athleticism/ dominance / I don’t have to jump in and save you seeing as you can clearly handle your business, damn girl do your thing.
            Those of you who don’t know girls are vicious have clearly never taken a trip around WorldStar or similar site.

            • taekwondogirl
              taekwondogirl
              December 23, 2013 at 12:13 pm | #

              …I don’t know how traditional “cat fights” actually work, as I’ve never participated in them. My assumption is that people who have not trained or done much fighting have less control over their actions, and my experience lines up with that.

              And liking cat fights aren’t just sexy, it’s about objectifying women. Just because some women like men fighting doesn’t mean it’s on the same scale, and I would still argue that women liking men fighting is creepy. It’s turning the entire argument, the feelings felt on both sides and the violence into being about pleasing you. Don’t you find that dehumanizing, at least a little?

              • David Willis
                David M Willis
                December 23, 2013 at 12:44 pm | #

                Objectifying ladies or men is fine by me so long as you know when to shut that off. If that mindset’s overruling everything else all the time, you got a problem. It’s also good to know when that’s not appropriate, like, say, when a girl is having a serious freakout, AHEM. But finding your desired sex or gender super-hot is just being friggin’ healthy. The idea of sexual attraction being dehumanizing seems not healthy.

                • taekwondogirl
                  taekwondogirl
                  December 23, 2013 at 12:50 pm | #

                  Fair points. I must not have communicated myself properly. I was meaning that finding two people fighting each other sexy, and I will amend my point to agree that up to a certain threshold it’s normal. The particular, current scenario was coloring what I was posting.

              • begbert2
                begbert2
                December 23, 2013 at 2:53 pm | #

                …I just like seeing women who can kick ass and take names and don’t need some man to do their fighting for them. One of them is good, two of them is better. -2 if they’re dressing or otherwise acting like objectified idiots. (Which hampers my ability to appreciate most female superheros or street fighter characters.)

                As for the ‘serious freakout’ point, I’m still okay with thinking that Sal would be being awesome if she managed to defend herself from an unexpected attack by a crazed Amazi-girl. (I am currently operating on the assumption that Sal’s catholic school did not include fighting training or martian DNA injections, so she should be only about ten times as good in a fight as me, which ain’t saying much. And Amber has watched violence, practiced violence, and possibly trained with martial arts masters around the world, so yeah.) Amber in such a fight, on the other hand, would just be scary or sad/depressing, or most likely both.

          • Cybersnark
            Cybersnark
            December 23, 2013 at 11:52 am | #

            Exactly, it’s cultural training.

            When men fight, it’s about dominance.

            When women fight, it’s about sending someone to the hospital/morgue.

        • Pat
          Pat
          December 23, 2013 at 1:09 pm | #

          Referring to combat between multiple women as a “catfight” is not a particularly good sign.

          It shows, right there, that it isn’t considered the same as a “normal” fight.

          • begbert2
            begbert2
            December 23, 2013 at 2:47 pm | #

            Right, to me normal fight means “pounding on each other above the belt until one drops, then posing above his panting form”. “Catfight” means “slugging, clawing, wrestling, biting, hair pulling, stabbing, and whatever else until the other one stops moving”.

            • A
              A
              July 18, 2015 at 1:03 am | #

              All your shitty, sexist comments here explain a lot about your posts on Dorothy.

  16. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    December 23, 2013 at 12:04 am | #

    It looks like 2nd panel Amber’s chest was about to burst open.

    • Izzy
      Izzy
      December 23, 2013 at 12:07 am | #

      It looks like she was about to use her super breath

      • Sageress
        Sageress
        December 23, 2013 at 12:11 am | #

        It looks like she was doing a very emotional rendition of Thriller.

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        December 23, 2013 at 12:11 am | #

        Lungs of Steel.

        • Aizat
          Aizat
          December 23, 2013 at 12:25 am | #

          Bo…You know what? Forget it.

      • Rex Hondo
        Rex Hondo
        December 23, 2013 at 6:37 am | #

        The internet was so obsessed with “Fus Ro Dah” for so long, I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised that people don’t recognize that Amber is obviously using “Wuld Nah Kest.”

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          December 23, 2013 at 7:37 pm | #

          I had to google search to find out what you were talking about, I have never come across that meme before.

  17. Sageress
    Sageress
    December 23, 2013 at 12:06 am | #

    “THAT’S THE GIRL WHO KEPT ME FROM THOSE TWINKIES, YEARS AGO!”

    • Matt
      Matt
      December 23, 2013 at 12:13 am | #

      MY PARENTS ARE DEAAAD TWINKIES ARE GOOOONE!

      • Ess
        Ess
        December 23, 2013 at 12:49 am | #

        This is shaping up to be some superhero backstory, let me tell you.

  18. Soozi
    Soozi
    December 23, 2013 at 12:07 am | #

    i’ve been hating on Ethan lately but that panel where he’s grabbing Amber to pull her to safety(unless she’s a human shield? haha) made me “AWWWWWW” so hard I think I broke something. Thanks for the sudden feels Willis.

    • Jon P
      Jon P
      December 23, 2013 at 12:13 am | #

      If only college freshman Ethan had the character of high school freshman Ethan.

      • xKiv
        xKiv
        December 23, 2013 at 7:22 pm | #

        He still has it, but it has been broken. All levels sucked out by undead and so on. Not playable any more.

  19. HAB
    HAB
    December 23, 2013 at 12:08 am | #

    I wanted a fight, redemption and blood.

    • Golbez the Awesome
      Golbez the Awesome
      December 23, 2013 at 8:18 am | #

      so much blood…

  20. Jack Finch
    Jack Finch
    December 23, 2013 at 12:09 am | #

    The heedlessness of her flight is terrible to watch. Poor thing.

    • Sageress
      Sageress
      December 23, 2013 at 12:09 am | #

      Yer a dang poet.

    • begbert2
      begbert2
      December 23, 2013 at 2:56 pm | #

      Just wait, next she’ll randomly run into Blaine.

  21. CookieCrumbler
    CookieCrumbler
    December 23, 2013 at 12:10 am | #

    And to think that all Amber wanted to do was chillax in her room and kill spiders. If she had just stuck to that plan, I wonder if this would have happened?

    • begbert2
      begbert2
      December 23, 2013 at 2:56 pm | #

      There would have been many dead spiders. The carnage would have been horrible.

  22. hmrc4evr
    hmrc4evr
    December 23, 2013 at 12:10 am | #

    Well, at least we know the hand on Amber’s jacket belongs to Ethan who was pulling her to safety.

  23. Idon'tcarenomore
    Idon'tcarenomore
    December 23, 2013 at 12:11 am | #

    Did not go the way I thought it would either. I was sure Amber would have reached the end of her rope at sight of Sal, and the realization of who she was in relation to the store robbery. I’m sure never noticed anything but the cash, look at the tremor in her voice, she was scared to death too.

    Willis strikes again: Amber does nothing. She did not mop the floor with Sal, not did she just sit down and curl up into a ball and refuse to come out.

    She has had it I guess, but again, she is running.

    As noted, Amazi-girl comes out at night. So, interested in seeing what the night brings tonight.

  24. Sageress
    Sageress
    December 23, 2013 at 12:12 am | #

    The question is, where’s Amber going?

    • Mr K
      Mr K
      December 23, 2013 at 12:20 am | #

      To make out with Dina to distract herself, of course!

    • Jack Finch
      Jack Finch
      December 23, 2013 at 12:39 am | #

      I hope she goes to Ruth.

      • Sageress
        Sageress
        December 23, 2013 at 12:43 am | #

        Reasoning?

        • Ourorboros
          Ourorboros
          December 23, 2013 at 4:04 am | #

          I thought of Ruth before too.
          Ruth also comes from an abusive background and struggles with it.
          She certainly doesn’t like Blaine and is already on Amber’s side on that issue.
          She clearly has a protective side and this also gives her somebody to focus that on. Important as she’s trying to stop drinking. She needs enough to occupy her and something to care for, but not enough to stress her to the point of drinking.

          She’s also dysfunctional beyond her alcoholism. But sometimes the right dysfunctions match. That sometimes gives you the Hillside Strangler, but it can also be two people trying to find the strength to get beyond their past.

          • Jack Finch
            Jack Finch
            December 23, 2013 at 7:42 am | #

            Pretty much what I was thinking.

        • Jack Finch
          Jack Finch
          December 23, 2013 at 9:02 am | #

          Just to tack on … Ruth is kind of soft inside with armor plating on the outside. But she she seems pretty aware underneath it. I think she’d be as protective of Amber as she is of Howard.

      • DinoNuggets
        DinoNuggets
        December 23, 2013 at 1:32 am | #

        Perhaps Mike?

        • Ourorboros
          Ourorboros
          December 23, 2013 at 4:04 am | #

          Unless he has a softer side, no.

  25. Psycho
    Psycho
    December 23, 2013 at 12:12 am | #

    Now I kinda want to see Amber kick Sal’s ass. Am I wrong for thinking that?

    • JustDucky
      JustDucky
      December 23, 2013 at 5:41 am | #

      Yes.

  26. Idon'tcarenomore
    Idon'tcarenomore
    December 23, 2013 at 12:13 am | #

    aggg edit…read ” I’m sure Sal never noticed..”

  27. Heavensrun
    Heavensrun
    December 23, 2013 at 12:14 am | #

    Wait, Sal tried to use a knife to hold up somebody behind a security barrier?

    • Aziraphale
      Aziraphale
      December 23, 2013 at 12:20 am | #

      Most gas stations, you’re dealing with a couple feet of countertop and that’s pretty much it. It’s what’s often behind the counter that she should’ve taken into account (bats, machetes, guns, etc… which may also give a clue as to where this is going).

      • Aziraphale
        Aziraphale
        December 23, 2013 at 12:24 am | #

        Oops. Just saw the plexiglass. Good catch. And not a bright move on Sal’s part (though it’s also possible she could threaten people on her side of the glass as a way of getting what she wants).

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      December 23, 2013 at 12:36 am | #

      If the stores are anything like they are in Oz, for legal and insurance, the policy for been robbed is to comply with the thief’s demands unless you can reasonaly believe that people’s lives would be at stake.

    • so279
      so279
      December 23, 2013 at 1:07 am | #

      I like to imagine this scene going like when Dr. Evil tells the UN he’s holding the world hostage for $1,000,000. And like 10 employees behind the security screen are just sitting there laughing hysterically.

    • Jack Finch
      Jack Finch
      December 23, 2013 at 9:14 am | #

      Yeah. Sal seems one of those people that learn everything the long hard way, if they learn it at all.

      • Jen Aside
        Jen Aside
        December 23, 2013 at 1:01 pm | #

        …COULD be, Sal is just doing like what the one dude with no insurance did–“held up” a bank for $1 with a note that explained how he was holding up the bank for $1.

        So he could get prison insurance.

        We never found out if Sal’s hold-ups were violent or resulted in anything other than incarceration. Not to say this wouldn’t still be super-traumatic for already teetering-on-the-brink Amber, ’cause at that point in her life, THIS WAS THE FRIGHTENINGEST THING SHE’D EVER EXPERIENCED.

  28. Kernanator
    Kernanator
    December 23, 2013 at 12:14 am | #

    B-But our showdown!

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      December 23, 2013 at 12:37 am | #

      Later that night, Amber pulls out the chainsaw and that’s when the real fun begins. >:D

      • begbert2
        begbert2
        December 23, 2013 at 2:59 pm | #

        Yeah, chainsaw aside, I lay even odds that Amazi-girl will be stalking a specific target tonight. Though I hope not, because I’m not seeing how a surprise attack with the Amazi-lead-pipe could go well for Sal.

        • Mr K
          Mr K
          December 23, 2013 at 5:02 pm | #

          She’ll lose her memories, and then become a sweet school girl again.

  29. xain
    xain
    December 23, 2013 at 12:14 am | #

    this does have potential Danny is going to most likely assume this freak out is about them and thus hopefully rush to Ambers aid. Come on Willis give us a x-mas miracle and dont make danny dan this up! PLEASE WILLIS PLEASE DONT DAN IT UP

  30. Idon'tcarenomore
    Idon'tcarenomore
    December 23, 2013 at 12:14 am | #

    Nope Psycho, I don’t think you’re wrong at all.

    But, Sal didn’t set out to hurt Amber, never noticed anything in the store but the cash and getting out. Looked like she was pretty scared.

    I’d like to see her kick the crap out of Danny.

  31. Super Duper
    Super Duper
    December 23, 2013 at 12:15 am | #

    Amber, Amber, Amber. Can your backstory be any more tragic?

    • Sageress
      Sageress
      December 23, 2013 at 12:19 am | #

      “Is that a challenge.” -David “Punchlaser” Willis

    • KingMabel
      KingMabel
      December 23, 2013 at 12:22 am | #

      Don’t tempt it… we haven’t seen the aftermath. For all we know her dad could have called her out for panicking and not defending herself…

      or Ethan could be crying along with her….

      • Mr K
        Mr K
        December 23, 2013 at 12:28 am | #

        Here’s my theory. Blaine started of as a nice guy. He came to defend Amber, but was kicked so hard by Sal that he changed personalities.

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          December 23, 2013 at 12:39 am | #

          The link below kinda disproves your theory.

          http://www.dumbingofage.com/2013/comic/book-4/01-the-only-dope-for-me-is-you/gasstation/

        • John
          John
          December 23, 2013 at 12:44 am | #

          Problem with that theory is that Blaine was already an asshole when we saw him in the car a few strips ago.

          • Mr K
            Mr K
            December 23, 2013 at 12:46 am | #

            He’s just annoyed, not abusive.

        • Bill
          Bill
          December 23, 2013 at 12:53 am | #

          The comments Blaine made when he pulled into the station showed us he was already a contender for crummiest father status.

          • Bill
            Bill
            December 23, 2013 at 12:54 am | #

            Memo to self:  refresh page before commenting.

  32. Matt
    Matt
    December 23, 2013 at 12:15 am | #

    Yes, father, I shall become a twinkie. And now we know why Amazi-Girl proudly dresses in bright yellow.

    • Aziraphale
      Aziraphale
      December 23, 2013 at 12:21 am | #

      I am become Twinkie, destroyer of worlds.

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        December 23, 2013 at 12:40 am | #

        also the decayer of teeth.

    • StClair
      StClair
      December 23, 2013 at 12:29 am | #

      Criminals are a superstitious, sugar-craving lot… they fear yet covet the Hostess, for it is their greatest desire and weakness in one.

    • Rex Hondo
      Rex Hondo
      December 23, 2013 at 2:08 am | #

      She totally focused on the wrong thing when watching Ghostbusters when deciding that a really big Twinkie is frightening in and of itself instead of just a metaphor.

  33. fogel
    fogel
    December 23, 2013 at 12:16 am | #

    Amber is getting WAY more than her fair share. Perhaps counseling and meds would be in order more than going back to Amazigirl.

    • Sageress
      Sageress
      December 23, 2013 at 12:20 am | #

      Joining the circus and shaving William Shatner’s face into her hair would be a better move than going back to Amazi-Girl.

      • fogel
        fogel
        December 23, 2013 at 12:24 am | #

        Shaving her hair and wearing Shatner’ s toupee?

    • Mr K
      Mr K
      December 23, 2013 at 4:59 pm | #

      Giving head to strangers in a back alleyway for a nickle would also be better than being Amazi-Girl. But I’m not sure whether Amber can get over her obsession.

  34. Izzy
    Izzy
    December 23, 2013 at 12:18 am | #

    I always like when I forget to check an update until 10:59 then I get 2 back to back

  35. lividjellyfish
    lividjellyfish
    December 23, 2013 at 12:18 am | #

    Why do I get the sinking feeling this is going to end with self-harm?

    • Alex Stritar
      Alex Stritar
      December 23, 2013 at 12:20 am | #

      Well, if Amazi-Girl punching people counts as self harm, then yes.

    • StClair
      StClair
      December 23, 2013 at 12:30 am | #

      all I can say is that I’m really glad that D(Y)W has said that no one is going to die.

    • Jack Finch
      Jack Finch
      December 23, 2013 at 10:22 am | #

      I think she’d have a history of it already.

  36. Blue Dragon
    Blue Dragon
    December 23, 2013 at 12:21 am | #

    I guess the reason Sal isn’t using a gun is because the glass is probably bullet proof. Maybe during Sal’s flashback we’ll eventually see how much luck she had threatening the store clerk behind the glass barrier (which we can see in the first panel).

    • Ourorboros
      Ourorboros
      December 23, 2013 at 2:10 am | #

      In spite of how it may look, getting a gun isn’t the easiest thing for a random kid.

  37. Saaam
    Saaam
    December 23, 2013 at 12:22 am | #

    Hopefully doesn’t ruin Danny’s chances with Sal.

    • Xerxes93
      Xerxes93
      December 23, 2013 at 5:50 pm | #

      you can’t ruin something nonexistent.

  38. Lawzlo
    Lawzlo
    December 23, 2013 at 12:23 am | #

    So how do you think Amber will respond when Danny tells her that Sal is secretly Amazi-Girl?

    • Mr K
      Mr K
      December 23, 2013 at 12:26 am | #

      “How can you be so dumb? It’s obviously Faz”

      • Sageress
        Sageress
        December 23, 2013 at 12:28 am | #

        Spoiler: Sal was Faz the whole time.

        • DinoNuggets
          DinoNuggets
          December 23, 2013 at 1:32 am | #

          That…what?

          • Sageress
            Sageress
            December 23, 2013 at 11:10 am | #

            Shocking, I know. But you’ll come to accept it.

        • xKiv
          xKiv
          December 23, 2013 at 7:36 pm | #

          Even during the time when Sal was with Walky and the Walkerton parents, while Faz was with Dina and *her* parents?

          (and then presumbly when Sal was getting her hair done while Faz was being tied up)

          >_>

  39. NIghtsbridge
    NIghtsbridge
    December 23, 2013 at 12:23 am | #

    And then Amber runs away from Campus and finds Blaine waiting for her.

    • newllend
      newllend
      December 23, 2013 at 12:36 am | #

      Where she unleashes hell on him

      • Mr K
        Mr K
        December 23, 2013 at 12:34 pm | #

        And gets sent to prison for assault.

        • begbert2
          begbert2
          December 23, 2013 at 3:03 pm | #

          He is trespassing, with clear nefarious intent towards her. I think of all the people Amber could unleash her stress upon, Blaine is the one most likely to result in a sympathetic jury.

    • Vree
      Vree
      December 23, 2013 at 4:53 pm | #

      Or her mom!

      Or your mom.

      Or Mike’s mom.

      • Ikaru
        Ikaru
        December 23, 2013 at 7:35 pm | #

        For a nickle.

  40. newllend
    newllend
    December 23, 2013 at 12:26 am | #

    Sal just standing there like” ok that just happend.”

  41. Bilfred
    Bilfred
    December 23, 2013 at 12:31 am | #

    FUN!

  42. Kateastrophe
    Kateastrophe
    December 23, 2013 at 12:31 am | #

    Well, since Danny will inevitably make it about him (guy is searching for a manic pixie dream girl, I swear), Ethan BETTER go after her.

    • ninja_jesus
      ninja_jesus
      December 23, 2013 at 12:59 am | #

      We need Danny to make it about him, or his character arc will never be able to advance. Maybe, at the end of this, his delusions about a manic pixie dream girl will be shattered just as it was with Q at the end of Paper Towns, and he’ll finally see Amber as herself, and not as how he wants her to be (a.k.a. Amazi-Girl).

      • Ourorboros
        Ourorboros
        December 23, 2013 at 2:13 am | #

        Nope. Danny’s about being passive. His dream, either as Lois Lane or being carried through life by Dorothy, is about being passive.
        Plus I think a woman with esteem should be better than Danny. Pretty much in the definition.

        • ninja_jesus
          ninja_jesus
          December 23, 2013 at 3:19 am | #

          And that dream is about to be shattered, I can assure you. And once it’s shattered, he’s not gonna be passive for long. He just hasn’t had any motivation, narrative or otherwise, to actually start anything. He’s in the process of ending the dream of being passive throughout life, and I think this crisis with Amber is the key to that.

  43. Jake
    Jake
    December 23, 2013 at 12:33 am | #

    No… I’m still confused. She witnessed Sal robbing the gas station and… she fell over? Someone help me out here. Why is that fifth panel showing, exactly, that is so traumatic?

    • Aakriti
      Aakriti
      December 23, 2013 at 1:02 am | #

      I’m with Jake. I don’t fully understand the fifth panel either.

      • DinoNuggets
        DinoNuggets
        December 23, 2013 at 1:37 am | #

        Ethan is pulling her out of the way

        • Mal
          Mal
          December 23, 2013 at 11:25 am | #

          I understand that Ethan is pulling her, but panel 1 has Sal’s back to Amber. ethan is pulling Amber back, presumably away from Sal. But then the 5th panel, the shelf is falling or rocking, and Sal’s hair is in the top left? I’m enjoying the comic, but I don’t understand how Sal’s hair can be there, with the rest of the action going on.

          • begbert2
            begbert2
            December 23, 2013 at 3:08 pm | #

            The camera seems to be sitting on or behind the counter looking past Sal at the distant shelf and Amber, with extremely deep focus that includes both. Just because you’re seeing Sal’s hair doesn’t mean she’s looking in their direction.

      • Rex Hondo
        Rex Hondo
        December 23, 2013 at 2:10 am | #

        It’s Ethan grabbing Amber and dragging her behind the shelves.

        • Jack Finch
          Jack Finch
          December 23, 2013 at 9:23 am | #

          I think Amber was on the verge of a panic attack from her social anxiety and Sal just kicked it over into full-blown terror. The kind that creates a positive-feedback memory loop that causes PTSD. Hence the flashbacks.

  44. Mr K
    Mr K
    December 23, 2013 at 12:33 am | #

    I’ll forgive Danny if he tries to comfort Amber. I’d like it better if he succeeds. Seriously, Danny needs to succeed at one thing.

    • newllend
      newllend
      December 23, 2013 at 12:39 am | #

      Ya at this point its just…my god

    • Super Duper
      Super Duper
      December 23, 2013 at 12:49 am | #

      I’m not sure that is physically possible.

    • ninja_jesus
      ninja_jesus
      December 23, 2013 at 12:50 am | #

      Before Danny can comfort Amber, he needs to eliminate the possibility of Sal being Amazi-Girl. Now would be that perfect opportunity, as there is a girl who currently needs saving. In his mind, the “real Amazi-Girl” wouldn’t hesitate to go after someone who’s quite obviously in need, so I should think these next few strips would be of him confronting Sal about Amber’s trouble, trying to egg her on in an attempt to “reveal” the superheroine who is his girlfriend.

      • begbert2
        begbert2
        December 23, 2013 at 3:09 pm | #

        I’m not sure Amber’s kind of need is an Amazi-girl kind of need, though. I’ve heard that punching someone is an inferior method of administering counseling to them.

      • Ikaru
        Ikaru
        December 23, 2013 at 7:37 pm | #

        I don’t think it’ll work that way. As far as Danny is concerned, Amber saw him with Sal and freaked out. I don’t think he’ll think past that point.

  45. Red Robot
    Red Robot
    December 23, 2013 at 12:40 am | #

    Apropos of flashback week…

    Flashback (narrative): in literature and dramatic media, an interjected scene that takes the narrative back in time from the current point.

    Flashback (psychology): a sudden, powerful, re-experiencing of a past experience. The term is used particularly when the memory is recalled involuntarily, and/or when it is so intense that the person “relives” the experience, unable to fully recognize it as memory and not something that is happening in “real time”.

    I haz a sad.

  46. ninja_jesus
    ninja_jesus
    December 23, 2013 at 12:45 am | #

    Aha! And now this gives Danny the opportunity to hint at Sal that she should become Amazi-Girl and go after her!

    I think… I can see the ending.

  47. Bob Ross
    Bob Ross
    December 23, 2013 at 12:49 am | #

    I don’t know bout you people, but I really want to hear Sal’s side of that. Was she pressured into it? Was she super poor and needed to? Drugs? Go-kart rides? What?

    • Red Robot
      Red Robot
      December 23, 2013 at 1:10 am | #

      It is not about the money, it is about sending a message.

      The message is “I exist”. A child who isn’t getting the attention he or she needs from her parents will begin to behave in whatever manner necessary in order to get any crumb of attention.

      • Bob Ross
        Bob Ross
        December 23, 2013 at 1:52 am | #

        Yeah that’s what I assume but you never know with this comic. Could be another plot twist. Maybe Amber’s dad pressured her to :O

      • StClair
        StClair
        December 23, 2013 at 12:22 pm | #

        This.

    • Mo
      Mo
      December 23, 2013 at 1:10 am | #

      Give it another five years, and we’ll get it.

      • Red Robot
        Red Robot
        December 23, 2013 at 1:21 am | #

        Actually, the Dark Knight was released just a bit over five years ago. Man, time flies when you are having fun.

  48. Ridureyu
    Ridureyu
    December 23, 2013 at 1:02 am | #

    This is all Danny’s fault. Stupid Danny. Someone should kill him.

    • begbert2
      begbert2
      December 23, 2013 at 3:11 pm | #

      Yes, obviously. I think that Danny was even responsible for the convenience store robbery. Somehow.

      • Ikaru
        Ikaru
        December 23, 2013 at 7:39 pm | #

        Didn’t you know? Danny was the evil genius behind Blaine’s abuse on his family too. And he caused Ethan to be gay. All his evil evil fault. Somehow.

  49. Chase
    Chase
    December 23, 2013 at 1:08 am | #

    Yeah, I think I prefer the nice blue flashbacks to these red trauma memories

  50. LiamAldam
    LiamAldam
    December 23, 2013 at 1:18 am | #

    Oh I got it now.

    Amazi-Girl’s gonna bring Sal to justice.

    • begbert2
      begbert2
      December 23, 2013 at 3:11 pm | #

      But…Sal’s already been brought to justice.

      • LiamAldam
        LiamAldam
        December 23, 2013 at 8:05 pm | #

        Not for emotional crimes.

  51. Leah Rockshard
    Leah Rockshard
    December 23, 2013 at 1:23 am | #

    I just keep thinking about how when Danny asked Amazi-Girl for her backstory, all she said was something like, “There was this robbery– No, I can’t talk about it.”

    If Danny finds out Sal robbed a convenience store or two, that will only confirm the mistaken identity in his mind. He’ll think she became Amazi-Girl as penance, and the web will become more tangled.

    • Zigzag
      Zigzag
      December 23, 2013 at 1:45 am | #

      Because Danny is Danny and always has to Dan everything up, Danny-style.

      • Leah Rockshard
        Leah Rockshard
        December 23, 2013 at 11:59 am | #

        Well, and also because the god of this universe just keeps setting him up. The evil, evil, damnation-worthy god.

  52. John
    John
    December 23, 2013 at 1:28 am | #

    Let me get this straight.
    Amber’s gay ex is dating a girl again, but is actually happy this time.
    Said ex reminded her she’s still got anger issues to work out.
    Amber just got rejected in favor of the alter-ego she created as an unhealthy way to let off steam.
    The guy who rejected her is now hanging out with the convenience store robber because he thinks she’s the alter-ego (really, why? They have two completely different body types), and he’s enjoying himself.
    That’s a quintuple whammy of social failure.

    • The Candyman
      The Candyman
      December 23, 2013 at 10:16 am | #

      And she slips on a twinkie, just to drive the point home.

    • Ikaru
      Ikaru
      December 23, 2013 at 7:41 pm | #

      Yeah, I never got for a moment how he could confuse them….they look nothing alike. Even with wig to change hair, boots for height difference, dark so can’t tell skin difference, voice disguised…they still aren’t…..comparable.

  53. Angelicfiend
    Angelicfiend
    December 23, 2013 at 1:28 am | #

    I just see Amber being alone for a bit, making sense of all of this and then Amazing Girl making justice on Sal

  54. Leah Rockshard
    Leah Rockshard
    December 23, 2013 at 1:29 am | #

    People who are saying that Amber’s overreacting because Sal didn’t directly menace her with the knife or anything… let me reframe a little.

    Amber was a thirteen-year-old kid growing up in an abusive home with no sense of security. Maybe other thirteen-year-olds have a feeling of invincibility or whatever, but this is a little girl who knows through direct experience that bad things happen ALL THE TIME, in her world, for real, not just on TV. She walks into a store, starts to feel shitty about herself for liking Twinkies, and suddenly someone is waving a knife around like two feet from her and shouting that it’s a robbery.

    How the fuck would this NOT be a terrifying experience for a child? You don’t have to be stabbed to be traumatised, for fuck’s sake.

    • Pizkie
      Pizkie
      December 23, 2013 at 11:53 am | #

      This, this, this. I’ve got a friend with some severe social anxieties (she acts pretty much like Amber with the whole twinkie “they’ll know!” thing). Someone that socially fragile has to spend a lot of time convincing themselves that the world is much safer than they think; that things will be okay; that the dire consequences WILL NOT HAPPEN. And then in Amber’s case, they did happen.
      Imagine being let down by the world like that. Even the most emotionally stable person would be rattled by the experience – the socially fragile person will have most of their coping mechanisms shattered.

      Tl;dr: Poor Amber. I just wanna give her a hug.

  55. Arkantos
    Arkantos
    December 23, 2013 at 1:41 am | #

    DAMMIT WILLIS!

    • Arkantos
      Arkantos
      December 23, 2013 at 10:19 am | #

      Seriously, that was the first strip that legitimately made me post that.

  56. Zigzag
    Zigzag
    December 23, 2013 at 1:41 am | #

    She’s gonna, with thirteen years old strength and one knife, rob a store with a thick security barrier? Sal really really didn’t think this through. Flashback isn’t over, something hasn’t gone wrong yet.

    • Mr K
      Mr K
      December 23, 2013 at 1:50 pm | #

      She could take someone hostage, and refuse to let go until the cashier gives some money. Or Nachitos .

  57. I don't know what to put here.
    I don't know what to put here.
    December 23, 2013 at 1:43 am | #

    SAL IS A SUPERVILLAIN!!!

    • I don't know what to put here.
      I don't know what to put here.
      December 23, 2013 at 1:43 am | #

      A HOT supervillain, too!

  58. JoeMerl
    JoeMerl
    December 23, 2013 at 1:49 am | #

    So Danny liked but rejected Amber, got with Amber’s alter ego, had a falling out with Amber, and is now accidentally cheating on Amber’s alter ego with another girl who had a random run-in with Amber years ago and thus helped created the alter ego.

    Congratulations. I officially declare this the most convoluted, weird love dodecahedron ever. *golf clap*

    • Ourorboros
      Ourorboros
      December 23, 2013 at 2:19 am | #

      You have the beginning order wrong.
      Saved by Amazi-Girl, develops crush.
      Meets Amber in class, talks.
      Talks with both, goes for one half of his fantasy.
      Over reacts to Amber from Freshman Family Weekend – when she was running from Blaine.
      Then the bit about Sal.

    • John
      John
      December 23, 2013 at 2:20 am | #

      And you didn’t even mention the part where Amber’s ex-boyfriend dumped her after coming out as gay, but is dating another girl, who may possibly have a bisexual girl-crush on Danny’s ex-girlfriend, whose new boyfriend is Amber’s nemesis’s twin brother, and meanwhile Amber’s ex is flirting with his new girlfriend’s trans-sister…

      • Jack Finch
        Jack Finch
        December 23, 2013 at 9:30 am | #

        Cue Bob Newhart. Oh to be young and in love…..and not them.

      • Ikaru
        Ikaru
        December 23, 2013 at 7:43 pm | #

        ….Wow…so…all we need now is for said trans-sister to hit on Amber, and bring this all full circle.

  59. Allcool-dontcare
    Allcool-dontcare
    December 23, 2013 at 1:54 am | #

    I see wat ur planning Willis… well played my friend well played… unleash the flashbacks and freak outs my good author

  60. Kevin
    Kevin
    December 23, 2013 at 1:55 am | #

    Looks like Ethan got some major boob grab

    • Leah Rockshard
      Leah Rockshard
      December 23, 2013 at 3:18 am | #

      Unlike most 13-year-old boys, he probably did not even notice.

      • Kevin
        Kevin
        December 26, 2013 at 3:17 am | #

        Hey I’m not 13 years old 🙁 I am an ADULT

  61. Charles Phipps
    Charles Phipps
    December 23, 2013 at 2:06 am | #

    The next comic should totally be Amazi-Girl swinging in and attacking Sal.

    Confusing Danny to no end and making him believe there’s a Earth-3 universe with an EVIL Amazi-Girl.

  62. Shanunu
    Shanunu
    December 23, 2013 at 2:13 am | #

    The day of the Danny murder draws near… prepare yourselves.

  63. etyb
    etyb
    December 23, 2013 at 2:18 am | #

    Methinks she’ll run into Billie or Ruth next. Hopefully Ruth to comfort the poor girl.

  64. Kiggy
    Kiggy
    December 23, 2013 at 2:44 am | #

    I have an even worse feeling about this(tm)

  65. All Else Fails
    All Else Fails
    December 23, 2013 at 2:51 am | #

    Calling it now:

    Danny: Look, it’s a bunch of thieves.
    Sal: Mm-hmm.
    Danny: …Aren’t you gonna do anything to stop them?
    Sal: It’s not mah problem.
    Danny: But if you don’t do something, they’re gonna get away!
    Amber (AG): *outside* I’m really not in the mood for this. Stop now and nobody gets hurt.
    Danny: …What?
    Thief #1: Yeah? What are you gonna do about it?
    Amber (AG): *proceeds to kick the thieves’ butt*
    Danny: …So, you’re not Amazi-Girl?
    Sal: YOU THOUGHT AH WAS THAT GEEK???

    Ah, might make a fanfic of this. Possibility= ~24% on a good day

    • Leah Rockshard
      Leah Rockshard
      December 23, 2013 at 3:23 am | #

      The thing that jarred me with this scenario (other than the idea that Willis would ever actually clear matters up with such a low level of drama) was, I realised after some reflection, that Sal would call AG a geek in a pejorative manner. She’s never really gone round insulting people. Sal’s pretty laid-back. I think it’s what makes her the super-cool to Billie’s sort-of-pathetic. Sal doesn’t give a shit what anyone else does (minus her family), she just does her thing.

      And I think that’s why I like her.

  66. All Else Fails
    All Else Fails
    December 23, 2013 at 2:56 am | #

    In other news, I think Danny’s face in panel six should have an epic zoom-in moment.

  67. TheCollector444
    TheCollector444
    December 23, 2013 at 3:27 am | #

    Man, now the hoping for a confrontation between these two where Sal actually knows what happened back then with Amber has between out Billie and Ruth getting together as my most anticipated story to see.

    Though, lesbians are great….

    …lesbians, truth, lesbians, truth…..

    Hmmmmm….

    Ok, well, I’m gonna go with the Sal/Amber story as it just seems more likely to happen.

    • Mr K
      Mr K
      December 23, 2013 at 8:14 pm | #

      Amber realizes that Caramel is better than Twinkies.

  68. Elliot-Chatham
    Elliot-Chatham
    December 23, 2013 at 3:27 am | #

    I just noticed – is Sal left handed? She seems to be holding the knife in her left hand.

    • Bill
      Bill
      December 23, 2013 at 3:48 am | #

      I commented on that yesterday.  If you go back, the first time we see her she is lighting her cigarette with her left hand; and she generally holds things like her cigarette or her jacket in her right hand — which (if she were left-handed) would allow her to keep her dominant hand free.

  69. Just for kix
    Just for kix
    December 23, 2013 at 3:31 am | #

    When you have a guy like danny as your boyfriend, you know you are in a world of hurt apart from the world of hurt that you already reside in.

  70. isitsevenyet
    isitsevenyet
    December 23, 2013 at 4:11 am | #

    Ugh, my heart aches for Amber right now. Few things are worse than to be freaking out emotionally, for legitimate reasons, and for people to think you’re “weird” or “weak” or something because of it.

  71. Acher4
    Acher4
    December 23, 2013 at 5:30 am | #

    Wow, i have to say.
    Ethan is quick to respond in bad/reallybad situations.
    Good for him. That’s a +1 for him for sure.
    Good friend.
    Shitty closet lover thought :P.

  72. Charles RB
    Charles RB
    December 23, 2013 at 5:33 am | #

    Hoooooooly shit

  73. gangler
    gangler
    December 23, 2013 at 6:43 am | #

    So, did Sal do something traumatic and frightening while she was robbing the store or was Amber just not equipped to deal with that on account of the rest of her life?

    • Kathleen
      Kathleen
      December 23, 2013 at 7:10 am | #

      When you are a victim of abuse, the threat of violence is super fucking scary bc you have experience w it leading to real violence. So yeah, someone waving a knife can be super traumatizing, even if you’d assume otherwise. Also she already had generalized anxiety about people in general.

      • gangler
        gangler
        December 23, 2013 at 7:13 am | #

        Makes sense.

      • isitsevenyet
        isitsevenyet
        December 24, 2013 at 10:32 am | #

        It can be scary even if it doesn’t normally lead to physical violence, speaking from experience. But I think gangler’s question was legit, I mean Amber would very likely be freaking out because of the trigger, but it’s also possible that Sal actually did something else too.

  74. DiscordInc
    DiscordInc
    December 23, 2013 at 8:08 am | #

    Oh snap! Didn’t see that coming, thought the pieces are there for in in retrospect.

  75. CianM1301
    CianM1301
    December 23, 2013 at 8:45 am | #

    Well, that could have gone worse.

  76. Taz
    Taz
    December 23, 2013 at 8:58 am | #

    ok, at least ONE of you is going after her to help calm her down and comfort her right?
    RIGHT?!

    • Jack Finch
      Jack Finch
      December 23, 2013 at 9:30 am | #

      But….but….WIGGLER!

  77. hmrc4evr
    hmrc4evr
    December 23, 2013 at 10:51 am | #

    I wonder what Ethan will do when he learns of this situation?

    • hack
      hack
      December 23, 2013 at 11:13 am | #

      “hey, you’re that girl from that one place back then.”
      “wutaboutit?”
      “nothing.”

  78. Steve
    Steve
    December 23, 2013 at 1:19 pm | #

    Bravo.

  79. chris73
    chris73
    December 23, 2013 at 1:35 pm | #

    Dammit Danny you want to be a hero well nows your chance to be one and go after Amber and act like real friend would

  80. Charles Phipps
    Charles Phipps
    December 23, 2013 at 1:49 pm | #

    Odd thought: Sal wasn’t ignored by her parents because of her color but because of the much-much worse fact of Walky being far smarter than her. Which would be like an extra kick in the gut.

    • Gold
      Gold
      December 23, 2013 at 2:11 pm | #

      I think we forget that Walky is actually a genius in a disguise of adolescence.

  81. demoneater
    demoneater
    December 23, 2013 at 2:19 pm | #

    I am torn. At first I was all about shipping Amber and Danny but now after having read all of shortpacked to date and starting out on Roomies I fear that amber trying to date him violates the rules of the walkyverse… CURSE YOU DRAMA TAG!

    • NoHeart
      NoHeart
      December 23, 2013 at 3:45 pm | #

      my thoughts exactly

  82. vlademir1
    vlademir1
    December 23, 2013 at 4:03 pm | #

    I keep reading the comments on this storyline and wondering how many people have actually read the chapter title. I have some very strong suspicions about how this will all resolve out, especially as I strongly doubt Danny/Sal has any better chance here than in the Walkyverse for very similar reasons…

    • Calvin Coolage
      Calvin Coolage
      December 23, 2013 at 10:52 pm | #

      After reading your comment, I finally get the title of the chapter. Danny is the dope and he’s the only one for Amber. Damn, I thought it something to do with drugs.

  83. itachi_0501
    itachi_0501
    December 23, 2013 at 4:07 pm | #

    Dun-dun-duh! You mean…Amber is Amazi-Girl? AND, Sal was the Burglar to her Spider-Man? The lump of clay to Hippolyta’s hands? The…exploding planet…to her Superman…esque…ness?! Nay–nay–the shrapnel to her little heart?!

    Damn you Willis. But in the best way evuh.

    • Rex Hondo
      Rex Hondo
      December 23, 2013 at 10:15 pm | #

      I was thinking of Sal as Amazi-Girl’s Joe Chill, personally. And she just walked in on her Vicki Vale/Talia/Lois Lane/Rachel/God-Batman-has-a-lot-of-love-interests-over-his-various-incarnations doing things doing things with the villain that she thought he would only do with her.

      Yes, I’m saying that in Amber’s geek-mind, Mario Kart is a sex-level betrayal.

      • itachi_0501
        itachi_0501
        December 24, 2013 at 9:56 am | #

        Nice. I see what you did there. 🙂

  84. Gargamel
    Gargamel
    December 23, 2013 at 5:00 pm | #

    Damn it! Damn it all! Everyone be damned!

  85. JepMZ
    JepMZ
    December 23, 2013 at 6:44 pm | #

    Does that mean Gollaso’s wife’s cancer is caused indirectly by the martian invasion which is why she is alive in this universe since martians aren’t part of the story?

    • David Willis
      David M Willis
      December 23, 2013 at 6:48 pm | #

      There is no link between the two universes other than sharing characters. There’s no cause-and-effect splinter timeline stuff going on.

      • Roborat
        Roborat
        December 24, 2013 at 3:00 pm | #

        Aww, you are no fun, you should have made some cryptic comment and egged him on.

  86. demoneater
    demoneater
    December 23, 2013 at 6:55 pm | #

    So if the universes are not linked that does that mean that we shouldn’t expect the couples to remain the same? Will the great Faz will finally marry Amber and Robin in the name of the greatness that is Faz?

    • Ikaru
      Ikaru
      December 23, 2013 at 7:48 pm | #

      Well, I do like that Faz actually knows his father in this universe, but other than that….um…Faz….*scratches head*….needs to have a ‘break the haughty’ and learn manners. Not likely.

  87. Calvin Coolage
    Calvin Coolage
    December 23, 2013 at 7:34 pm | #

    I CAN SE CLEARLY NOW THE RAIN IS GONE!

  88. Ikaru
    Ikaru
    December 23, 2013 at 7:49 pm | #

    So…..not a lot of comments about how Danny will perceive this. I can only imagine that he will jump to the conclusion that she is upset to see him with Sal, when I don’t think she even noticed him.

    • chris73
      chris73
      December 23, 2013 at 8:04 pm | #

      I’m hoping that Danny will see that his friends in trouble and will do the decent thing and see if shes ok.

  89. Cyan1deDr3ams
    Cyan1deDr3ams
    December 23, 2013 at 9:11 pm | #

    Okay, okay, I keep getting confused. How does Amber know Walky and Sal? Did they have any backstory? I know that Billie and Walky were friends in their childhood, but.. Oh god getting confused.

    • David Willis
      David M Willis
      December 23, 2013 at 9:38 pm | #

      If you want to know how Amber knows Sal, just read the comic at the top of the page.

      • Cyan1deDr3ams
        Cyan1deDr3ams
        December 24, 2013 at 12:20 am | #

        Oh, alright, so that was quite literally the entire depth of their relationship prior to going to university. Got you. I thought that was the case, but then I realized that many of the characters had more backstory and were friends prior to going to university together, so I thought I had missed something or was swapping backstories with other characters in the series in my memory.

    • Leah Rockshard
      Leah Rockshard
      December 23, 2013 at 9:39 pm | #

      Amber does not know Walky or Sal. At age 13 she happened to be in a convenience store when Sal robbed it.

      Sal and Amber were assigned to the same dormitory building on campus. They each moved in a couple of weeks ago.

      A few days ago she saw Sal for the second time in her life as Sal walked past in the dorm with Billie. Amber looked shocked.

      Today Amber saw Sal again, for the third time in her life, with Danny. This prompted a PTSD flashback of the time five years ago when she witnessed Sal’s robbery.

      Make sense?

      • Aziraphale
        Aziraphale
        December 23, 2013 at 10:41 pm | #

        Slight clarification: the times Leah’s referring to here are in comic time, not calendar time.

      • Cyan1deDr3ams
        Cyan1deDr3ams
        December 24, 2013 at 12:18 am | #

        Yes! That does make sense. Thanks! This was my first interpretation so I did have a decent understanding in the first place, but then I thought that there was some backstory that I had missed or sped over. I always doubt that I have things right.

  90. man in black
    man in black
    December 23, 2013 at 9:46 pm | #

    great page

  91. Roborat
    Roborat
    December 24, 2013 at 3:01 pm | #

    From Danny’s face in the last panel, I suspect (hope) he will go after Amber and end up doing the right thing, albeit for the wrong reasons. Doing good by accident, that would fit the Danny way.

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