Size 6, 9 inches?
XD XD XD YOU WIN!
That sounds about right.
You must be some sort of black wizard. There is not other way to explain how you came up with the best comment so fast.
They prefer to be called African-American wizards.
Only if they live in African America.
That comment is SO MUCH WIN
Where did they put it? I can’t find it on any of my maps.
And why would you care? Shouldn’t you be doing someone’s mom right about now?
Only if nickels are involved somewhere.
The Irony Of Choking on Joyce’s Strap-on (if that works?)
OH MY indeed!
God damnit, how do people keep getting this number?!
Hopefully someone gets him the right blueberries this time, OR ELSE! (someone please get that reference)
That episode was a beauty.
I presume you mean North Carolina blueberries and not Michigan blueberries, right?
Incidentally, I don’t think I’ve been able to find either locally…it’s either Texas blueberries (which are local) or foreign blueberries. Which might explain that incident in San Antonio.
Are they African Blueberries or European Blueberries?
Yes! Finally! A fellow Psych-O!
Time to shove a brick of the Horizon Guy’s ass.
Verizon. Dammit, I fucked it up!
what about shoving a brick of the horizon attached to the Verizon up this guy ass would that work?
Nah, see I’m making a reference to Team Fourstar’s Dragonball Z abridged series. There’s an ongoing joke where a character tries to telepathically contact someone and instead contacts George Takei, usually after saying something easily misconstrued as innuendo and prompting one of his traditional “Ohhh my”s. At one point King Kai vows to shove a brick of the “Verizon guy’s” butt if it happens again. And now that I’ve explained the joke it is ruined forever.
That’s so Takei!
I think I’m a size six, too.
Well, I am now anyway.
Sal’s got that Tom Siddell style angle-mouth going in that last panel.
She dropped the cigarette….
Or swallowed it.
Naw, you can see it falling if you look below her mouth.
Good catch, I didn’t see that until you pointed it out.
Now I want to see the DoA cast guest star over at Gunnerkrig.
And poor Billie looks like that comment broke her mind.
Billie’s twitching eyelid is a thing of beauty.
I love how Mike is still the same. Almost like he’s thinking, “yeah, i can see people telling her that.”
He’s pondering his next move. “Do I explain and break her brain now? No, let’s drag this out. But how…?”
“Drag what out? The stap-on? Should I ask Ethan? Why are you all looking at me like that?”
why would he ever tell he when he can use her Ignorance to break other people?
gotta think about efficiency after all
I got the perfect fit.
…how would you know if it fits?
It’s Plasma. Plasma just knows.
But of cause! ^_^
So Mike is Pagan! That answers all my questions about his hair
It’s like stonehenge. We will never truly understand its mystery.
Aliens did it.
No, wait. That explanation doesn’t work in this universe.
It’s to cause us confusion and frustration, you know like mike.
What’s the meaning of Mike’s hair~!
Someday on a tiny island somewhere somebody is gonna discover the megalithic stone columns painstakingly sculpted one and all into hundreds of giant middle fingers pointing to the sky, each arranged in a slightly different direction so that they ring the island in such a way as to literally cover every horizon. Literally a people who gave the middle finger to the world. On that day Mike will know who his people truly are.
Its the Buddhist in you, it’s the pagan in me
Its the Muslim in him, she’s Catholic aint she?
Its the born-again look, it’s the WASP and the Jew
Tell me what’s goin’ on, man, I ain’t got a clue!
I figured he would be a Earth Mother worshipper.
…for a nickel?
Mike is too powerful to believe in a higher power.
Mike’s higher power was in your mom, for a nickel.
I thought Mike was using that word in the generic ‘non-Christian’ sense.
Nah, Mike is obviously a Buddhist.
How comfortable would a hoodie dress work as pyjamas? I’d think the zipper would be annoying.
Sweatshirts make for better PJ tops.
I’m a big believer in basketball shorts and a t-shirt.
I generally stick with underpants and nothing else, but on really cold nights or when company is around I’ll put on some shorts and a t-shirt so I don’t scandalize them.
I have a GIANT knee length Obama t-shirt. It is the best Pajamas.
Obama has a line of clothing now??
It’s for conservatives and designed to be as itchy and uncomfortable as possible. That way whenever they have a bad night’s sleep, the first thing they can say upon waking is “THANKS, OBAMA!”
I just cannot imagine us Aussies wearing Tony Abbott shirts in the same manner.
My condolences on that Tony Abbott being PM thing, btw. Heard he’s a huge bag of Rupert Murdoch-sponsored dicks.
Obama has his shirts and apparently Murdoch’s strap-ons were shipped to Australia? Eye-eye-eye, that’s gotta sting.
Sal’s reaction face is the best.
That is a good answer for whenever someone asks you where someone is.
Although you’ll probably feel shitty if you’re right.
And may find yourself a suspect.
I used to say, “Hell, where he belongs.” Only I’d exaggerate my accent (so it’d sound closer to “hay-ell”). And then I’d pretend I hadn’t, and answer normally.
I have heard it referred to as “the little death.”
Straight people like strapons too!
Walky’s too busy today. Nothing in Dorothy’s dorm room shall go without having a weenus pointed at it.
I just had a vision of Sierra lying on her bunk pointing a strap-on at things, saying, “You’re right! This is fun!”
And Dorothy just rolls her eyes and goes to class.
^This! This wins all of the internets!
is it weird that I think mike’s being nice because he didn’t push the pagan thing?
… that’s weird right?
Five days from now Willis will spring his trap, and we’ll realize that Mike was just biding his time for the most painful moment possible.
He’s telling Joyce to ask everyone about strap-ons and then will tell her what it is after she asks literally everyone.
Nah, he saw where Joyce was going and let the magic happen on its own.
@Cephalo..:Mike, the Aikido master.
He doesn’t have to push it and he knows it.
Yeah, I’m kinda weirded out by how *not* malicious Mike looks. He seems so…earnest.
I get the feeling Mike wasn’t even trying at that moment. This isn’t one of his set-ups, just a passing target of opportunity.
Pretty sure Joyce is a permanent target of opportunity.
Joyce DOES look like a Size 6 strap-on kind of girl.
I bet she’s bigger than all the male characters.
She was during the Canadian Incident, as we found out later.
Bigger than Walky, at least.
Now that WPAS exists, we could probably extrapolate what that means…
Yes, actually she is only bigger than Walky, the only one she could compare her/himself with. And sorry, what is WPAS?
Willis’ porn on Slipshine, “Walky Performs a Sex.”
If you’d said “Willis’ porn AT Slipshine” we’d have a double acronym. Drat it.
Oh WOW. You appalled SAL. Level up, Joyce!
Makes sense as Sal is only a size 4 gal herself.
Something her and her brother have in common.
Not sure if want.
*Level-up-noise* “Congratulations, Joyce! You have just leveled up to- Oh. You have already spent your skill points into Faith, huh? You should know about the diminishing returns… Everybody around you knows how unbalanced your “build” is, hun.”
“I put a point in your mom.”
“Everyone has points in my mom. You might have an STD.”
At least we know what her little Final Fantasy victory dance is:
I can’t imagine that expression ever being on Sal’s face before… EVER!
And she’ll own the fudge out of it.
Huff huff I ran outta breath
Good one, Willis.
Haven’t seen Mike in so long, yet he never disappoints.
Oh… God. This is just too wonderful.
I don’t have much experience but I’m pretty sure I’ve never been this naive and I thought I was pretty bad.
Oh my god, Sal’s face.
She’s guilty about lashing out at Walky before his death.
God, I love that last panel. I remember being just as naive my freshman year as Joyce is now.
Mike in rolled-up sleeves leaning on things like James Dean is giving me a slight case of the PSL.
I am so on board with how this avatar turned out.
You dirty dirty pervert.
Joyce’s face in the last panel is so… accurate.
Also, did she actually dress everyone today? Loot at Mike!
Maybe you can ask your parents to go shopping for one with you!
She clearly already has one according to your gravitar.
She can even buy Ethan one of those nice leather hoodies while she’s at it.
My brain >_< it died.
Opps, I did it again!
Wasn’t there a horrible song with this title – sometime in the dark past?
I still have all the lyrics memorised.
LOL @ everyone’s faces in the last panel. Amazing.
That last panel…
I’ll get back to you when I catch my breath.
Mike is BACK BABY!
And the world is all the better for it. Long live Mike!
Walky is dead! Long live Walky!
‘s a bit Contradictory don’t you think?
Technically Sal’s a Walky, too.
Wow, it’s been five months since Mike’s last appearance.
Mike is always there, just off screen, giving the finger while he’s fucking your Mom.
Mike! How I’ve missed you!
If you want to borrow a strap-on, Joyce, make sure they wash it, first.
Joyce: “Well, obviously! I’m not gonna just wear someone else’ s strap-on right after they’ve worn it! That’s gross!”
*Appalled faces continue*
YAY!!!!! MIKE!!!! Last time he showed up was on my birthday last year!
poor innocent Joyce… haha
Did Mike get taller?
Ha Ha! Well Played Mike!
Dat eye twitch.
When Joyce gets home she is totally gonna do a google search for “fun things to do with a strap-on”
oh joyce…. hunny, no….
also, Sal and Billie’s faces=best thing ever.
Is she going to ask everyone in the class?
Maybe she should ask Amber she dated Ethan she could lend her one….thats if she doesn’t still want to beat the shit out of her.
Is this chapter going to be center around these three at the same time? cool I want to see their collective reaction to Walky and Dorothy having sex, Especially joyce.
Mike, oh how I have missed you so.
The one time I start drinking something while the page loads.
Sal and Billie’s faces…
I had a friend in high school who was sheltered in a similar way, one of my favorite quotes of hers was, in a sort of high-pitched voice, “What’s a BJ?”
Our moment like that happened in 8th grade. Tammy kept asking everyone in class including our English Teacher (a very grandmotherly type). Finally, ‘Bad Blow’ Bordeaux whispered into her ear what it was. Because of the mini-skirt she was wearing, we could tell that her embarrassment went from head to toe.
Chortled audibly at the last panel.
Um…anyone else think Mike looks really cute in that outfit?
I do. The rolled-sleeve buttonless look works for him.
Mike bought Joyce a Strap-on because he’s a nice guy.
It kinda DOES go with the outfit!
You’re both horrible and have my respect.
I love how it goes OVER the hoodie dress….
Obviously. Because Ethan will like both.
Well, it fits.
“So, now I rub it on your tummy, right?”
Actually, Joyce may have to come from behind since it looks more like one of those special back-massagers.
Awesome. You have my amusement. Is there a way I could see the original post so that I can upvote this thing [and other cool stuff] to Valhalla?
Billie is having an eye twitch moment. let us all have a moment of silence as Billie’s sanity slowly bleeds away.
Damn you Willis! (somebody needed to say it)
Oh wow… I just about died from this. Joyce, please don’t change… well, not for a long time anyway.
OK I tried way too hard for the above. This strip reminds me of when a college friend said “You mean it didn’t put out?” when I reported that an ATM wasn’t working for me.
Damn prick-tease ATM!
Mike looks the most surprised
Even Sal doesn’t know what to do…
Chances are someone has. I mean, Mike would go shopping for one rather than miss the opportunity, probably a squirting one. She’s going to wear it on her head to gender studies. And Ethan will be strangely turned on.
And Roz will be upset because it isn’t using protection.
We know Sarah has toys, at the very least.
Sal dropped her cigarette, literally. Billie’s having a stoke?
Welcome back, Mike….missed you so much.
Ah, that one needs a classic rimshot.
Billy is realizing the strap-on she bought may go unused and she may give it to Joyce.
Oh gods. I haven’t laughed this much over a comic in a good while. *rotflmao* Gotta love that last panel.
Oh, Mike. When will you learn you can’t defeat Joyce? Your snark only makes her sillier.
I love Billie and Sal’s expressions in the last panel. They have NO idea what the hell is going on, but I’m guessing that at least one of them finds out sooner or later (probably Billie).
Huh. Third panel Mike looks like he’s actually just throwing it out there.
Joyce is autobiographical, eh?
Billie looks like she got a sudden bout of diarrhea.
Not sure whether I like Billie or Sal better here. Billie almost looks like this is her first time picturing pegging, whereas Sal looks like she’s thinking ‘eh, not fun for me’.
Oh god… I suddenly ship Mike/Joyce.. because he was nice to her for half a second. Also he is straight. Oh gooosh. I can just imagine him protecting her from the world. So cute.
I find your ideas intriguing and wish to subscribe to your newsletter. I will continue to prefer Sarah/Joyce (Or perhaps Joyce/Sarah), but I find Mike/Joyce an entertaining prospect.
I still remember when original Mike curb stomped a first grader that looked remarkably like Joyce..
Who should ask Ruth if she could borrow her strap on…
If she hasn’t David Caradine’ed in her closet…
Mike/Joyce/Ethan in an epic ot3.
I’ve been shipping them for months.
Mop up in aisle 3, please.
Did Mike just out Ethan to Sal and Billie?
That’s actually a really good point. Given Sal’s experience with forced conformity, she might not appreciate Joyce’s attitude towards Ethan (trying to ‘fix’ him).
Billie’s so messed up her reaction could be a lot of things.
I think Joyce and Amber are the only people in the comic that Ethan was ever in to.
Well Billie still thinks Ethan’s straight since she’s only met him once, that I can remember.
But I don’t think so, since while Mike is an asshole, here he’s not that much of one. He makes subtle hints, some less so than others, to Joyce but that’s because as far as Mike knows, Ethan is leading her on.
Most likely Willis just wanted to draw Sal and Billie freaked out as a punchline.
And even then we know he wasn’t into Amber.
He’s not even into Joyce. She’s just a convenient beard for him.
Forgotten about Jocelyne already, huh? Ethan was so into her over Joyce he was constantly ignoring Joyce in favor of talking to her more.
“In to”, as in the opposite of “out to”, not “into”, as in, “wants to bang like a screen door in a hurricane”.
Oh. Well, then you’ve left Mike off the list, although honestly, if there’s any similarity to Shortpacked!Ethan, Mike could probably go on either ‘into’ list.
Outed? Depends on how narrow-minded they are. Being gay is about who turns you on rather than what turns you on. A strapon is useful for the case where you don’t want a man handling the peg.
So the one most likely to mistake this joke for the real deal would be Joyce. Except that she is missing the basics for even letting it register.
I dunno about Sal, but I think we can safely say that Billie is fairly narrow, at least in regards to her mind.
Dammit, Willis! You know you’ve just opened demands for Joyce-pegging-Ethan porn, right?
pagans wear sweater vest.
Most adorable bikers evar!
(If you don’t get it, just search “Pagans MC”.)
Oh, Joyce. I know you are naive but its Dinas job to not pick up on sarcasm. Kudos though by going back to your own quirks just as quick. Poor Joyce probably thinks “strap-ons” are some kind of spaghetti strap top, lol.
…Does Mike think everyone else is wearing pyjamas too, then?
No Mike, baggy sweaters are not pyjamas. And you’re assuming everyone WEARS pyjamas in the first place… xD
So does “size six” mean she takes 6 inches, then?
Sal has the perfect opportunity to jump in and give Joyce a clue.
Sal: Hey Joyce, you know how you can’t bring yourself to say the word, ‘fuck’?
Sal: Well, if you knew what a strap-on was, you probably wouldn’t be able to say that, either.
Billie: Yeah sure, I don’t think I’ll be using mine anytime soon anyway.
Sal and Billie look so disturbed. So so disturbed.
Mike didn’t even blink. He’s a professional.
Mike looks kind of disappointed in the last panel.
This is the first comic that gave me a genuine lol in like a week.
[spits coffee all over monitor]
Someone needs to give Joyce a raging clue.
I can’t wait until someone actually explains to her what a strap on is. XD
This is going to be the next Slipshine project then? Or are we doing Robocar & Malaya first?
“Ethan and Joyce perform a… weird, weird, awkward thing.”
Pleeeeeease, Mr. Willis? Please can we have a comic of UC and Malaya going at it? We’ll be good! We won’t curse you out for drama! We’ll do our chores and everything! Pleeeeeeease?
Ultra Car doesn’t really “go at it.”
You could tell the story as Malaya fantasizing about it instead of them actually doing it. That way no one’s personality is messed with
Drive at it?
A slipshine is a dress one slipsh in?
Wow, she broke Billy, and apparently Sal is also speechless, nice work Joyce.
Not just speechless. She dropped her cigarette as well. You can see it falling, just in front of her shoulder.
Oh Joyce, honey…there was so much innocence in that sentence. I thought you knew what the internet was? That’s how I learned.
All I ask is that you ink her reaction when someone finally explains that to her,….
The point of this strip aside, I think Mike looks incredibly sexy here.
I bet you could use pages of Dumbing of Age to ward off zombie comics.
“Rrrrnnn!” moans Dagwood “dynamically developed characters!”
“He’s actually researched both the subject and location of his comics!” hisses Mary Worth.
Margo, Tommie and Luann just explode like those Nazis from the end of Raiders of the Lost Ark.
Her innocence is hilarious.
i like how Sal is not immune to this, hahaha
Note to self
Be sure to NOT be drinking Coffee while reading Comics again.
Oooooookay then. If Ethan would like a strap-on worn by a woman, wouldn’t that make him straight? What am I missing here? How is this a gay joke?
I admit to being naive and getting much of my info about gay stuff from Dan Savage….
Yea and what makes him the catcher?
Now that I think about it, I guess it’s just a gay joke made by the characters, not a technically sound solution.
You’re right, he might be a top. And I *could* be overanylizing a stupid joke.
To be fair, he is a gay guy, TRYing to become straight? So… a girl with a strap on is a happy medium? he still gets a good dicking, and hes with a woman?
This is why we love you joyce.
I don’t know how they are able to chat so calmly while Walky is dead.
Why isn’t anyone talking about how this is probably the first genuine frontal view we’ve gotten of Mike’s hair? (Panel 2)
BTW as a Pagan, that is totally what pagans wear.
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