Dumbing of Age Book Twelve

Dumbing of Age

A college webcomic by David Willis
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July 11, 2026

Respected

by David M Willis on July 2, 2019 at 12:01 am
  • 04 - Vote for Robin
└ Tags: malaya, marcie, sal

Discussion (204) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. Ana Chronistic
    Ana Chronistic
    July 2, 2019 at 12:05 am | #

    what about a podcast about HOT HOT SEXENGS

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      July 2, 2019 at 12:58 am | #

      Imagine a podcast where the casters are actively fucking during it. Each week they have a topic and try to do their best to converse about it mid-coitus.

      • abysswatcher1993
        abysswatcher1993
        July 2, 2019 at 1:00 am | #

        That could be an episode of Night Vale After Dark.

      • Crotonhurst
        Crotonhurst
        July 2, 2019 at 1:08 am | #

        So a 7 minute podcast? Not a very deep analysis *cough*

        • Yotomoe
          Yotomoe
          July 2, 2019 at 1:35 am | #

          That’s not accounting for the foreplay. The podcast goes through the whole experience. Heavy petting to light kissing and all that. And then also the sex.

          • Screwball
            Screwball
            July 2, 2019 at 1:37 am | #

            So 7 minutes then? 😜

            • Casi
              Casi
              July 2, 2019 at 1:45 am | #

              7 minutes and 28 seconds.

              • Delicious Taffy
                Delicious Taffy
                July 2, 2019 at 1:58 am | #

                Are y’all just in a hurry or somethin’?

                • Screwball
                  Screwball
                  July 2, 2019 at 4:14 am | #

                  I’m guessing the 7 minutes includes stripping clothes of course. I guess 28 seconds is generous going off what I hear about many Humans…

                  I asked Daniel the Human if he was that fast. He just raised an eyebrow, then did his creepy starts-as-a-chuckle-then-goes-full-evil-laugh thing. It really creeps me out. It’s kinda like his own version of that Tim Curry Human’s laugh…

                • LeslieBean4shizzle
                  LeslieBean4shizzle
                  July 2, 2019 at 6:41 pm | #

                  Yeah seriously. Anything less than 20 minutes is a quicky. No one wants to listen to a podcast about quickies.

                • Clif
                  Clif
                  July 2, 2019 at 9:23 pm | #

                  You are aware this is the Internet? https://www.stitcher.com/podcast/erotic-awakening-podcast/e/ea415-quickies-48834951

      • Leadsynth
        Leadsynth
        July 2, 2019 at 7:49 pm | #

        There’s a dude in Chicago who goes on OKCupid first dates, audio-records the conversations, and posts them as a podcast. The people he’s dating are all in on this, of course. He won’t date anyone who isn’t down to be a guest on this podcast. I think there might be a woman who hosts, too.

      • Hielario
        Hielario
        July 4, 2019 at 6:48 am | #

        I think there was a video series where a person would try to read and explain a book while they had a vibrator/automatic sucking thingie going full speed on their nethers.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      July 2, 2019 at 1:12 am | #

      Don’t most podcasts involve three or more guys? So does that mean that podcasts are the new gangbang?

      • Marsh Maryrose
        Marsh Maryrose
        July 2, 2019 at 1:43 am | #

        This made me go check my current podcast subscription list. Apparently I am an anomaly, because of my 26 follows, not one of them is hosted by three guys. I do have one hosted by three women, but mostly they’re either public radio panel shows or single-host (with or without guest or guests) shows.

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          July 2, 2019 at 1:45 am | #

          Whenever someone mentions podcasts to me, it often seems to have three guys talking about random stuff.

          • Yotomoe
            Yotomoe
            July 2, 2019 at 1:47 am | #

            I myself am on a podcast with 3 guys (and one girl).

          • Marsh Maryrose
            Marsh Maryrose
            July 2, 2019 at 2:46 am | #

            I have exactly two favorites on my Sirius/XM app: NPR and MSNBC. Every time I launch the app, it prominently features Fox News and CNN. Marketing. :-/

            There’s a world of podcasts out there. Apparently a lot of them do indeed involve three dudes, but there are other ones out there.

          • Jasmijn
            Jasmijn
            July 2, 2019 at 6:05 am | #

            Here’s my podcasts, split by hosts and their gender:

            A woman and a man: 6 (three of which are One McElroy Brother And His Wife)
            One woman: 4
            Two women: 4
            One woman and a guest: 3
            One man and a guest: 3
            Two men: 3
            Three men: 2 (My Brother My Brother And Me & The McElroy Brothers Will Be In Trolls World Tour)
            A cast that changes every episode: 2
            One woman, two men: 2
            One man: 2
            Four men: 1
            Three women and one man: 1
            Five men: 1
            Two women and a guest: 1
            Two women and two men: 1
            Three women and two men: 1
            Three men and two women: 1
            One woman, one nonbinary person and three men: 1

          • anonamousethatscurriesinthedarkness
            anonamousethatscurriesinthedarkness
            July 2, 2019 at 12:23 pm | #

            Podcasts always have me first think of the closing scene of that movie about pods THEN my brain goes, oh yeah, they meant those internet video thingies. But he effect is the same.

  2. Doctor_Who
    Doctor_Who
    July 2, 2019 at 12:05 am | #

    Too subtle? Maybe she’ll notice if they fuse into Sugilite.

    • Leorale
      Leorale
      July 2, 2019 at 12:10 am | #

      She really puts the ‘b’ in subtle.

      • Deanatay
        Deanatay
        July 2, 2019 at 8:17 am | #

        Sometimes I wish Malaya were that silent.

      • ǝ snow ʍousɐ
        ǝ snow ʍousɐ
        July 2, 2019 at 1:36 pm | #

        Ooh, I like that!

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      July 2, 2019 at 1:47 am | #

      Marcie and Sal are Garnet in this scenario?

      • Doctor_Who
        Doctor_Who
        July 2, 2019 at 1:49 am | #

        I see Sal as Garnet and Marcie as Amethyst.

        Not sure about Malaya. Maybe if she called someone a clod.

        • Ryek Hvek
          Ryek Hvek
          July 2, 2019 at 9:00 am | #

          Malaya can be PeriDope

  3. TrueVCU
    TrueVCU
    July 2, 2019 at 12:06 am | #

    Oh, Malaya

    Simple, Malaya

    Simple, Spiteful Malaya

    Simple, Spiteful, Horny Malaya

    • Undrave
      Undrave
      July 2, 2019 at 12:50 am | #

      Malaya is such an a-hole in a truly hilarious way!

    • Bagge
      Bagge
      July 2, 2019 at 3:11 am | #

      Wait, I almost know that reference.. Disney, something?

      • TsunamiJane
        TsunamiJane
        July 2, 2019 at 7:58 am | #

        I was thinking Star Trek: Deep Space 9 myself. there’s a character who insists he is just “plain, simple Garak.”

        • TrueVCU
          TrueVCU
          July 2, 2019 at 5:26 pm | #

          Deepest cut: Frasier

      • Roborat
        Roborat
        July 2, 2019 at 4:30 pm | #

        I am thinking Smothers Brothers.

  4. Stephen Bierce
    Stephen Bierce
    July 2, 2019 at 12:07 am | #

    We’re so pleased you’re not dead, Willis! That would have been a poor career move for you. May your health and your Jetfire recover and prosper.

    • Matthew Davis
      Matthew Davis
      July 2, 2019 at 12:13 am | #

      With the buffer, would we know? 🙂

      • Stephen Bierce
        Stephen Bierce
        July 2, 2019 at 12:17 am | #

        The Tweet sidebar.

        • Agemegos
          Agemegos
          July 2, 2019 at 12:30 am | #

          I can’t see it for some reason. I get a “broken image” icon.

          • Cholma
            Cholma
            July 2, 2019 at 12:42 am | #

            Just imagine you hear Weird Al’s parody of “Living in America” playing in your head right now.

          • No Name
            No Name
            July 2, 2019 at 3:47 am | #

            Do you use an adblock? If so, that’s probably it.

            • Agemegos
              Agemegos
              July 2, 2019 at 4:35 am | #

              Yes, but I usually see the tweets. Perhaps it’s because I updated Chrome since yesterday.

              • Agemegos
                Agemegos
                July 2, 2019 at 5:44 am | #

                Looks as though my adblocker lost its white-list when I updated Chrome. Everything’s back now.

        • Sunny
          Sunny
          July 2, 2019 at 4:06 am | #

          *checks twitter*

          Turns out I missed a whole lot of internet yesterday.

      • Needfuldoer
        Needfuldoer
        July 2, 2019 at 1:42 am | #

        In three months, anyway.

      • Ana Chronistic
        Ana Chronistic
        July 2, 2019 at 5:26 pm | #

        Dang, still hurts a bit remembering our webcomic friend who we discovered had died bc he hadn’t updated after seventeen YEARS of never missing even one day 😖

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      July 2, 2019 at 1:09 am | #

      Death often makes any artist’s art more valuable.

    • Bicycle Bill
      Bicycle Bill
      July 2, 2019 at 9:49 am | #

      I hope they gave you the good mesh to hold your innards in place.
      (just what you needed to hear, right?)

  5. BBCC
    BBCC
    July 2, 2019 at 12:07 am | #

    Sure you do, honey. Sure you do.

    This is gonna be fucking hilarious.

    • BBCC
      BBCC
      July 2, 2019 at 12:07 am | #

      Glad you lived Willis. Both for your own and your family’s sakes.

      • Yumi
        Yumi
        July 2, 2019 at 12:09 am | #

        Also, it would have been hella weird reading the remaining updates from the buffer if you hadn’t.

        (And, like, woo, you not dying and all that.)

        • ShinyNeen
          ShinyNeen
          July 2, 2019 at 12:22 am | #

          I kinda feel like ghost-updates are a really cool concept until it’s the reality. Then it’s sad.

          Glad you’re okay, Willis!

    • JBento
      JBento
      July 2, 2019 at 12:48 pm | #

      The best we can hope for is that the “fucking hilarious” leads to hilarious fucking.

  6. AeromechanicalAce
    AeromechanicalAce
    July 2, 2019 at 12:07 am | #

    Malaya is so full of.herself I’m amazed she hasn’t collapsed into a black hole yet…

    • butts
      butts
      July 2, 2019 at 12:41 am | #

      she’s just a butt hole

      • Yumi
        Yumi
        July 2, 2019 at 1:04 am | #

        This reminds me when one time someone called this guy on the bus an asshole, and he responded with, “I’d rather be an asshole than a whole ass.”
        And the rest of us in that section did our best to look away and not get involved, but we made eye contact with each other that could be pretty much summed up as, “No? I don’t think tha g works, anyway. An ass can be appreciated, okay, but an asshole is generally less appealing? Unless you’re into that, which, no judgement, but I think I’d rather be the meaty part of the ass rather than an asshole.”
        We said all that with our eyes.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      July 2, 2019 at 1:01 am | #

      That WOULD explain why she’s so incredibly dense.

  7. Yumi
    Yumi
    July 2, 2019 at 12:07 am | #

    Someone once asked my mom to be on his podcast and she just laughed. Now I’m trying to figure out if he was hitting on her.

    • Stephen Bierce
      Stephen Bierce
      July 2, 2019 at 12:09 am | #

      Were there 5¢ coins involved? Or wooden replicas of 5¢ coins?

      • Yumi
        Yumi
        July 2, 2019 at 12:22 am | #

        He probably forgot to offer the nickel and that’s why she laughed.

  8. MatthewTheLucky
    MatthewTheLucky
    July 2, 2019 at 12:07 am | #

    Her mind is a well-oiled eagle!

    • Leorale
      Leorale
      July 2, 2019 at 12:09 am | #

      Mind like a steel sieve

      Sharp as a wet brick

      • Stephen Bierce
        Stephen Bierce
        July 2, 2019 at 12:18 am | #

        ELBOW
        First, an it like you, the house is a respected
        house; next, this is a respected fellow; and his
        mistress is a respected woman.
        POMPEY
        By this hand, sir, his wife is a more respected
        person than any of us all.
        ELBOW
        Varlet, thou liest; thou liest, wicked varlet! the
        time has yet to come that she was ever respected
        with man, woman, or child.
        POMPEY
        Sir, she was respected with him before he married with her.
        –Shakespeare, “Measure For Measure”

  9. tim gueguen
    tim gueguen
    July 2, 2019 at 12:08 am | #

    Unfortunately for Malaya she has the senses of a stuffed hawk.

    • Wizard
      Wizard
      July 2, 2019 at 2:10 am | #

      Or possibly a hawk that just flew into a window pane and is now severely concussed.

  10. William Leonard Reese Jr.
    William Leonard Reese Jr.
    July 2, 2019 at 12:08 am | #

    Ahhh. . . .Though they know her well they forgot to take into account the OTHER significant half of her personality.

  11. ValdVin
    ValdVin
    July 2, 2019 at 12:08 am | #

    I was wondering who this conversation was with, and I think it’d be the most fun if May from QC was just off-panel, trying to point out the obvious.

    • AeromechanicalAce
      AeromechanicalAce
      July 2, 2019 at 12:10 am | #

      Why do I suddenly want a Crossover where May and Carla meet?

      • Opus the Poet
        Opus the Poet
        July 2, 2019 at 12:13 am | #

        That would be so wild, and slightly universe-breaking. If we are going to be doing that I want Dina to meet Hanners.

        • CJ
          CJ
          July 2, 2019 at 1:22 am | #

          🤣🤣🤣🤣😂

        • Geneseepaws
          Geneseepaws
          July 2, 2019 at 8:35 am | #

          f=Yes++

      • Chris Phoenix
        Chris Phoenix
        July 2, 2019 at 6:16 pm | #

        Carla would just give May a new body.

        Now, if May met Malaya…! May would win. Hands down. (I wonder if May happened because Jeph stopped doing Yelling Bird and some other outlet was needed.)

  12. ktbear
    ktbear
    July 2, 2019 at 12:08 am | #

    Sal and Marcie are SO cute!!

  13. Lala
    Lala
    July 2, 2019 at 12:09 am | #

    This is off topic but do we know Sal’s major?

    • BBCC
      BBCC
      July 2, 2019 at 12:12 am | #

      She is currently undeclared.

      • Lala
        Lala
        July 2, 2019 at 12:14 am | #

        Thank you

      • Bicycle Bill
        Bicycle Bill
        July 2, 2019 at 10:07 am | #

        With the exception of Dorothy, who is bound for the White House and is merely marking time at IU until she can transfer to Yale, does anyone in the Dumbiverse have a definite plan or course of study?

        • JBento
          JBento
          July 2, 2019 at 12:46 pm | #

          The books have cast pages with their majors. Most folks haaaaaave… I hesitate to say “a plan”, because LOOK AT THIS LOT, but at least a defined course of action.

        • BBCC
          BBCC
          July 2, 2019 at 3:22 pm | #

          Books, book pdfs and occasionally Willis will spill on tumblr.

          Joyce – Elementary education. This was also Becky’s major at Anderson.

          Dorothy – Political Science

          Walky – Telecommunications

          Billie – Journalism

          Amber, Danny, Rachel – Computer Science

          Ethan, Sal, Joe – Undeclared

          Sarah, Jacob, Raidah – Pre-law

          Dina – Biology. This is also what Becky wants to major in at IU

          Ruth – English

          Mike – Social work (I still want to fight whoever allowed this. Also, note, the books mistakenly labelled his major as computer science)

          Roz – Gender studies

          Carla – Engineering, specifically Computer Systems Engineering iirc.

          Mary – Art Education.

          No clue about Malaya or Lucy. Leslie’s Ph.D is presumably in Gender Studies or a related field.

          • BBCC
            BBCC
            July 2, 2019 at 3:22 pm | #

            Oh, yeah, and Jason and Penny majored in math.

            • Clif
              Clif
              July 2, 2019 at 8:59 pm | #

              I choose to believe that Mike was going into hacking/computer science until he realized how much personal trauma he could cause as a social worker.

              • BBCC
                BBCC
                July 2, 2019 at 10:50 pm | #

                Sounds like Mike.

  14. NF
    NF
    July 2, 2019 at 12:12 am | #

    She’s a real prize, good luck Marcie.

  15. ShinyNeen
    ShinyNeen
    July 2, 2019 at 12:13 am | #

    “… Is it working yet?”

  16. Piotr W
    Piotr W
    July 2, 2019 at 12:15 am | #

    Get well, Mr. Willis.

    On another note: why is Malaya moving without walking? What do her hawk senses tell her of that strange situation?

    • ktbear
      ktbear
      July 2, 2019 at 1:17 am | #

      I would suggest, considering the changing background, that shes standing still and the point of view is shifting.

      • Agemegos
        Agemegos
        July 2, 2019 at 1:23 am | #

        She does seem to be turning to her right a bit.

  17. Yumi
    Yumi
    July 2, 2019 at 12:18 am | #

    There are way too many podcasts, but sometimes that means you can find out more information about someone you want to internet creep on because they’ve done a podcast, so I guess podcasts are still okay.

    Who in the cast would have a podcast? Who else in the cast would be on as a guest?

    • TemporalShrew
      TemporalShrew
      July 2, 2019 at 12:23 am | #

      It doesn’t matter whose podcast it is, Danny would be *delighted* to come on as a guest musician to play his ukulele.

      • Yumi
        Yumi
        July 2, 2019 at 12:25 am | #

        Joe invites Danny onto his podcast but it’s actually a ukulele-related intervention.

        • Needfuldoer
          Needfuldoer
          July 2, 2019 at 2:11 am | #

          Joe starts lecturing him on how “ukulele dweeb” is dominating his personality, Danny starts playing the ‘sad talk moment’ background music from Full House without breaking eye contact.

    • BBCC
      BBCC
      July 2, 2019 at 12:54 am | #

      Ethan would absolutely have a podcast on transformers. He’d invite Amber regularly, and Danny might come to humour him.

    • halstripey
      halstripey
      July 2, 2019 at 1:02 am | #

      Lucy would have a podcast, and she’d invite Walky, Dorothy, and Carla to be guests.

      • Yumi
        Yumi
        July 2, 2019 at 1:05 am | #

        She’d hella invite Billie, but Billie would never agree to it.

        • halstripey
          halstripey
          July 2, 2019 at 1:18 am | #

          Oh yeah. Nerd in denial.

      • halstripey
        halstripey
        July 2, 2019 at 1:16 am | #

        Dorothy, and also Joyce, would be invited via Walky’s suggestion. Walky and Joyce talk about Dexter & Monkey Master. Dorothy does too, but also discusses Teen Titans vs. TTG. Carla comes to talk about the superiority of Ultra-Car over other cartoons, especially D&MM.

      • halstripey
        halstripey
        July 2, 2019 at 1:22 am | #

        Another idea: Lucy and Walky weekly podcast about various cult films

    • Marsh Maryrose
      Marsh Maryrose
      July 2, 2019 at 1:52 am | #

      Rachel has a podcast about coding: “My God, This Code is Recursive!”

    • Bicycle Bill
      Bicycle Bill
      July 2, 2019 at 10:12 am | #

      I would expect Roz de Santo to have a NSFW podcast on sexual liberation/freedom and safe sex practices.

  18. butts
    butts
    July 2, 2019 at 12:20 am | #

    this strip is about 35% Malaya by volume

  19. Raen
    Raen
    July 2, 2019 at 12:21 am | #

    She can’t even properly fall for it.

    • Bagge
      Bagge
      July 2, 2019 at 3:09 am | #

      Goddamit Malaya

  20. DailyBrad
    DailyBrad
    July 2, 2019 at 12:21 am | #

    Nice to get back to silly again after a few days of holy shit.

  21. Miri
    Miri
    July 2, 2019 at 12:26 am | #

    D’aaaw they’re holding hands 😀

    I am so down for this story <3 I don't know if it will be more cute or hysterical but I wanna know! I am also curious as to how it will bisect with the Asher stuff… I am sure Walky’s recent shenanigans aren’t going to blow this up in their faces in any way…

    • Sunny
      Sunny
      July 2, 2019 at 3:58 am | #

      Maybe Asher will seek out Sal and Malaya… Well, there’s even odds as to whether she’ll punch him or fuck him then. I give it about 5% that she will do both.

  22. Nono
    Nono
    July 2, 2019 at 12:27 am | #

    It took me the longest time to realize Sal and Marcie were holding hands.

    • Bagge
      Bagge
      July 2, 2019 at 3:09 am | #

      Not as long as it took Malaya

    • Keulen
      Keulen
      July 2, 2019 at 3:20 am | #

      I’m wondering how long it’ll take before Malaya notices.

  23. Jess
    Jess
    July 2, 2019 at 12:28 am | #

    I feel like her shirt is meta commentary. ‘NOPE.’

  24. Derek
    Derek
    July 2, 2019 at 12:29 am | #

    who the hell is she talking to?

    • Piotr W
      Piotr W
      July 2, 2019 at 12:30 am | #

      Us. *mind blown*

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        July 2, 2019 at 1:01 am | #

        Malaya is fully aware she’s fictional and has an audience. *record scratch* yeah that’s me. I bet you’re wondering how I got into this situation.

      • No Name
        No Name
        July 2, 2019 at 3:54 am | #

        Now that I think about it, Malaya is definitely giving me some Emperor Kuzco vibes

  25. Norah
    Norah
    July 2, 2019 at 12:34 am | #

    Get well soon, Mr. Willis.

    • Needfuldoer
      Needfuldoer
      July 2, 2019 at 2:13 am | #

      Glad your insides are back where they belong!

  26. Marsh Maryrose
    Marsh Maryrose
    July 2, 2019 at 12:35 am | #

    I was going to make some snarky remark about the hernia until I did some basic research and discovered that hernias of the type that Willis described — on twitter, while it was happening to him, and undoubtedly extremely painful — are in fact potentially life-threatening.

    DYW, you magnificent bongo, good job staying alive!

  27. Delicious Taffy
    Delicious Taffy
    July 2, 2019 at 12:36 am | #

    She’s just an overall unpleasant person, isn’t she.

    • GoblinScribe
      GoblinScribe
      July 2, 2019 at 12:49 am | #

      I mean all she’s doing here is complaining about a lame pickup line so idk but I guess even “podcaster dudes are annoying” is a bad take when Malaya says it.

      • BBCC
        BBCC
        July 2, 2019 at 12:56 am | #

        In the guy’s defence, Malaya came up to HIM because Sal mentioned sexual interest. He may in fact have been legitimately inviting her to the podcast.

        • not someone else
          not someone else
          July 2, 2019 at 1:08 am | #

          Yeah, I get the impression we’re supposed to interpret this as “Malaya has decided regular conversation is a bad pick up line because she is actually Bad At Peopleing”.

          • BBCC
            BBCC
            July 2, 2019 at 1:18 am | #

            Basically how I read it, yeah. Malaya assumes the worst. Unless she likes you. The latter rarely happens.

          • GoblinScribe
            GoblinScribe
            July 2, 2019 at 1:21 am | #

            If that was the intention, Willis shouldn’t have made the guy a podcaster.

            • Delicious Taffy
              Delicious Taffy
              July 2, 2019 at 1:24 am | #

              What have you got against podcasters?

              • Yumi
                Yumi
                July 2, 2019 at 1:28 am | #

                Honestly, so much.

                • Delicious Taffy
                  Delicious Taffy
                  July 2, 2019 at 1:31 am | #

                  I don’t get it. It’s basically just talk radio?

                • Yumi
                  Yumi
                  July 2, 2019 at 1:32 am | #

                  Yeah, that’s, like, half of it right there.

                • Delicious Taffy
                  Delicious Taffy
                  July 2, 2019 at 1:35 am | #

                  …Okay, yeah, fair enough.

                • Needfuldoer
                  Needfuldoer
                  July 2, 2019 at 2:21 am | #

                  I wish podcasts were more like old-time radio shows. Burns and Allen, Jack Benny, Abbott and Costello, and Dragnet are good commuting listening if you can get past the corniness and cigarette ads.

                  Unfortunately scripted shows take a lot more effort than sitting four dorks around a Blue Yeti mic, so quantity beats quality.

                • Marsh Maryrose
                  Marsh Maryrose
                  July 2, 2019 at 3:00 am | #

                  Needfuldoer: If you’re listening to four dorks around a microphone, for God’s sake why?

                  Sturgeon’s rule (“Ninety percent of everything is crap”) applies to webcomics as much as it applies to podcasts — and yet we still have DoA as much as we have Bullseye.

                • Needfuldoer
                  Needfuldoer
                  July 2, 2019 at 4:10 am | #

                  Oh hell no. The last few podcasts I’ve listened to were all from TWiT.

                  “Four dorks around a microphone” is just a facetious example of the baseline, low effort crap that seems to flood the podcast market.

              • Marsh Maryrose
                Marsh Maryrose
                July 2, 2019 at 2:02 am | #

                Yumi: Dahlia Lithwick and Ana Marie Cox and Caitlin Doughty and Avery Trufelman and Sarah Koenig and the Kitchen Sisters would like a word with you. Really, that is literally what they would like.

              • FacelessDeviant
                FacelessDeviant
                July 2, 2019 at 3:30 am | #

                Those darn pod casters, always casting those pods!

                • Geneseepaws
                  Geneseepaws
                  July 2, 2019 at 8:41 am | #

                  f=Yes++

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      July 2, 2019 at 1:02 am | #

      She’s just my type of unpleasant though <3

  28. GoblinScribe
    GoblinScribe
    July 2, 2019 at 12:48 am | #

    Theory: Malaya has always assumed Sal and Marcie are in a troubled relationship/crushing on each other, and when she finally notices, she’s gonna be all “AHA! FINALLY! I’ve been trying to get you to admit your feelings to her all along, Sal!”

    • GoblinScribe
      GoblinScribe
      July 2, 2019 at 12:51 am | #

      And that’s been her motivation the whole time. That incredibly off-base assumption. And that’s why she’s never noticed Marcie’s efforts. That’s why she’s been so over-the-top at Sal.

  29. Eldritch Gentleman
    Eldritch Gentleman
    July 2, 2019 at 12:53 am | #

    I fear they will have to smooch to get through the reinforced concrete that is Malaya’s skull

    • abysswatcher1993
      abysswatcher1993
      July 2, 2019 at 12:59 am | #

      Malaya’s skull could headbutt Ultracar and leave a dent.

      • No Name
        No Name
        July 2, 2019 at 3:58 am | #

        Y’know, I’m pretty sure it did in the other comic. How else could she have survived a brawl with her (before her chassis transfer)?

    • Marsh Maryrose
      Marsh Maryrose
      July 2, 2019 at 1:22 am | #

      That could work, but only if Malaya is remotely interested in Marcie, sexually. Which is not something we have yet seen any evidence of.

      • Eldritch Gentleman
        Eldritch Gentleman
        July 2, 2019 at 1:36 am | #

        Well the plan is that she will want to smooch Marcie in order to spite Sal, we’ll see how that works out.

        • Marsh Maryrose
          Marsh Maryrose
          July 2, 2019 at 2:14 am | #

          Things that have been made evident in canon strips:

          – Marcie’s lust for Malaya
          – Malaya’s eagerness to spite Sal

          A things that as yet remains solely in headcanon:

          – Malaya’s interest in Marcie other than as someone to hang out with

          • thejeff
            thejeff
            July 2, 2019 at 6:25 am | #

            But that’s the point – even if she’s not interested in Marcie sexually, she’ll act to spite Sal. Marcie gets laid, Malaya gets to prove she’s better than Sal, Sal gets to make Marcie happy. Everyone is good.

            There’s no way this can backfire. Even if it all goes according to plan, it’s still likely to be a disaster.

            • Clif
              Clif
              July 2, 2019 at 9:07 pm | #

              The point with some disasters is to enjoy them while they are happening.

  30. abysswatcher1993
    abysswatcher1993
    July 2, 2019 at 12:56 am | #

    Welcome to Indiana

    *Cool scary and soft music.*

    Hello listeners. This is your host, Cecil Palmer, and today we got some news. Sal and Marcie are going to manipulate Malaya so Marcie can get into her pants and do what Carlos calls the horizontal tango. I love that man.

  31. All-Purpose Guru
    All-Purpose Guru
    July 2, 2019 at 1:04 am | #

    Ok, Marcie, just walk up and sign “Hey, you’re hot, let’s fuck.”

    Or, alternately, have Sal say it to Marcie and let Malaya hear it.

    • Lingo
      Lingo
      July 2, 2019 at 1:18 am | #

      Oh damn. I didn’t even realize she’s unintentionally dissing Marcie until you pointed it out.

      • halstripey
        halstripey
        July 2, 2019 at 1:26 am | #

        Omg I also did not notice. Wowow Marcie, how you feeling now?

    • Bagge
      Bagge
      July 2, 2019 at 3:27 am | #

      Why not the best of both plans?

      Marcie:”[Hey, you’re hot, let’s fuck.”]
      Sal: “What are you doing, Marcie? I do not approve of the two of you having steaming, hot sex multiple times each night. Besides, you can do better than Malaya.”
      Malaya: “The fuck you say? Let’s fuck.”

      • Agemegos
        Agemegos
        July 2, 2019 at 6:46 am | #

        This is a fine plan! Direct and subtle! Straightforward and manipulative!

  32. ProfessorDetective
    ProfessorDetective
    July 2, 2019 at 1:04 am | #

    She’s like Freude. Super Science Friends Freud at that. All of human… EVERYTHING… apparently leads back to sex, so just give up the ghost already, and let’s have an orgy!

  33. Kyoulkoa
    Kyoulkoa
    July 2, 2019 at 1:13 am | #

    Yayyy, Marcie and Sal friendin it up again

    • Lingo
      Lingo
      July 2, 2019 at 1:19 am | #

      Just gals … well you know the rest.

  34. Gwydion
    Gwydion
    July 2, 2019 at 1:19 am | #

    So are we clear on what Sal’s feelings towards Marcie ACTUALLY are yet? Romantically/sensually/sexually speaking, I mean.

    Sure, the setup is that she’s “pretending” interest to manipulate Malaya, but is that truly the case?

    • Agemegos
      Agemegos
      July 2, 2019 at 1:30 am | #

      Sal has made it clear and explicit that she will not fuck Marcie.

      http://www.dumbingofage.com/2015/comic/book-5/03-the-butterflies-fly-away/fuck/

    • Robbie
      Robbie
      July 2, 2019 at 1:36 am | #

      Well when Marcie said she wanted to (exact translation not mentioned iirc) Malaya, sal said something like “oh yeah I ain’t doin that”

      • Agemegos
        Agemegos
        July 2, 2019 at 2:55 am | #

        Translations of Ameslan often appear as the titles of the strips.

    • BenRG
      BenRG
      July 2, 2019 at 2:08 am | #

      Mostly guilt for her injuries and never being able to help with her medical needs. Beyond that, Marcie is a very good friend, no more.

    • Rycan
      Rycan
      July 2, 2019 at 12:42 pm | #

      Do you see how awkward Sal looks in these panels? It’s painful.

  35. HeatherJean
    HeatherJean
    July 2, 2019 at 1:43 am | #

    “Please be on my podcast! It’s 10 inches long, vibrates, glows in the dark, and plays “Nearer My God To Thee.”

    I wanna see less of Malaya and more of Amber and Walky.

    • Wizard
      Wizard
      July 2, 2019 at 2:02 am | #

      Somehow,
      “I whipped my big ten inch
      podcast of my favorite blues”
      just doesn’t have the same ring

  36. Yotomoe
    Yotomoe
    July 2, 2019 at 1:48 am | #

    Just going on record to say I still love Malaya.

  37. BenRG
    BenRG
    July 2, 2019 at 2:07 am | #

    Marcie, it’s pretty clear to me that Malaya has pretty much a trailer-full of issues about being the smartest one in the room and that no-one can fool her. Now, stand there and ask yourself this: Do you really, really want that sack of crazy that much?

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      July 2, 2019 at 2:22 am | #

      Some people dig Crazy.

      • BenRG
        BenRG
        July 2, 2019 at 2:46 am | #

        Marcie clearly isn’t one of them or she’d have been less angry about Sal’s partnership with Amazi-Girl.

        • Yotomoe
          Yotomoe
          July 2, 2019 at 3:39 am | #

          There’s different deal breakers for different people. Beating up random people at 6 AM is a bit different from this.

          • BenRG
            BenRG
            July 2, 2019 at 4:03 am | #

            Yes, for a start, this is more personal.

          • Miri
            Miri
            July 2, 2019 at 5:19 am | #

            Yeah, 6 AM is not the right time for doing anything but sleeping!

      • Marsh Maryrose
        Marsh Maryrose
        July 2, 2019 at 10:00 pm | #

        “Those sane girls, they’re so easy,
        But a crazy girl is hard to find.”
        –John Hiatt

    • Bagge
      Bagge
      July 2, 2019 at 3:00 am | #

      As far as I can tell… yes.

  38. FacelessDeviant
    FacelessDeviant
    July 2, 2019 at 2:42 am | #

    Panel nr 3. That is what I wish Marcie had done irl. But hey, since this is a webcomic, let the high jinks ensue!

  39. Bagge
    Bagge
    July 2, 2019 at 2:59 am | #

    Seems like someone wanted to do some… journalism

  40. DarkoNeko
    DarkoNeko
    July 2, 2019 at 3:04 am | #

    Yep, I really preferred her previous haircut

    • JBento
      JBento
      July 2, 2019 at 12:44 pm | #

      Same – this one looks like she got tired of having helmet hair after rollerderbying, so she just cut her hair to fit the helmet instead.

    • Roborat
      Roborat
      July 2, 2019 at 4:35 pm | #

      I like her new haircut, it suits her. I don’t like her any better than before, but I do think she is cute.

  41. Keulen
    Keulen
    July 2, 2019 at 3:22 am | #

    The last panel has me imagining Malaya as Gimli in this scene.

  42. Rotunda
    Rotunda
    July 2, 2019 at 3:38 am | #

    While we’re all focused on Sal, Marcie, and Malaya, a small distant figure in the far background moves between the last two frames.

    • Sunny
      Sunny
      July 2, 2019 at 4:09 am | #

      Could it be Slenderman?

      • Clif
        Clif
        July 2, 2019 at 9:13 pm | #

        I thought it was Jason by the silhouette.

  43. Shane Wegner
    Shane Wegner
    July 2, 2019 at 5:09 am | #

    Who is Malaya talking too? I’m sort of hoping she is aware enough to be playing into this situation and saying out loud that Marcie could probably say “let’s bang” if that’s what she means. Which would mean she really does have hawk like manipulation senses like a hawk.

    As likely, she is just doing some villainous monologuing.

    “NOTICE OUR HANDHOLDING SENPAI”

  44. Classic Appa
    Classic Appa
    July 2, 2019 at 5:28 am | #

    Hawks are notoriously difficult to manipulate.

    • Rycan
      Rycan
      July 2, 2019 at 12:37 pm | #

      Until you fit a leather hood over their head.

  45. Ophidiophile
    Ophidiophile
    July 2, 2019 at 6:56 am | #

    True fact: Hawks are super easy to manipulate. There’s a whole sport based on that.

  46. Arianod
    Arianod
    July 2, 2019 at 7:38 am | #

    Congrats on getting through the surgery, Willis! Get well soon!

  47. Josh Spicer
    Josh Spicer
    July 2, 2019 at 8:04 am | #

    Oh, is Malaya still here?

  48. Falcon
    Falcon
    July 2, 2019 at 8:14 am | #

    I find the funniest thing about this strip to be that Malaya is being so thick skilled she hasn’t even noticed Sal and Marcie holding hands through her monologue. They’re just standing there waiting.

    Oh, I don’t know for sure if this is happening, but I can feel the wheels turning in Marcie’s head wondering why she wants to bang Marcie so badly. Sal’s plan, after all, revolves around exposing and exploiting Malaya’s petty spitefulness. Marcie is this concentrated on that quality, which isn’t necessarily very attractive to most people.

    • Charlotte
      Charlotte
      July 2, 2019 at 10:11 am | #

      I find your second paragraph at least very plausible.
      Somehow I can’t see this ending with Marcie and Malaya getting together and being happily ever after. (Which may admittedly not be what Marcie wants anyway — has it ever been established if Marcie actually wants to date Malaya or just have sex with her?)

  49. BenRG
    BenRG
    July 2, 2019 at 9:27 am | #

    I think that Malaya’s podcast would best be titled: “Me, Uncensored and Unfiltered”

    • Marsh Maryrose
      Marsh Maryrose
      July 2, 2019 at 10:08 pm | #

      I’m pretty sure Malaya would never have a podcast, because Malaya really does not give a fuck about whether or not other people listen to her.

  50. Cass
    Cass
    July 2, 2019 at 11:11 am | #

    I’ve gotta say, as someone who has shipped Sal/Marcie nothing’s done a better job of convincing me they definitely aren’t interested in each other at all than how awkward they look just standing there holding hands.

  51. Gojira
    Gojira
    July 2, 2019 at 12:15 pm | #

    “We are merely exchanging long protein strings. If you can think of a simpler way I’d like to hear it.”

  52. ValdVin
    ValdVin
    July 2, 2019 at 12:22 pm | #

    Malaya, have you considered taking Joyce and Becky’s course in Lesbian Love Sleuthing?

  53. Orange
    Orange
    July 2, 2019 at 12:40 pm | #

    Malaya not yet noticing the hand-holding AND Sal’s awkward posture = the most bemusing tension, also who does Malaya think she’s talking to

  54. JBento
    JBento
    July 2, 2019 at 12:43 pm | #

    Or, in this case, failing to notice the manipulation itself.

    Also, Marcie, ffs, she’s practically telling you. Tell her you want to hit that. I had hopes for you being the single, mature one in the cast. I HAD HOPES FOR YOU!!!

    Sigh.

    Guess I got Asher now…

    • BBCC
      BBCC
      July 2, 2019 at 1:25 pm | #

      I think Marcie knows that’s the better, more mature, choice. I just think she’s also very nervous and afraid to actually come out and say it. Not just because the risk of rejection but telling someone you’re bi can be nerve wracking.

    • halstripey
      halstripey
      July 2, 2019 at 10:39 pm | #

      Asher is mature? “I was a dumb kid so stop trying to place any blame on me” Asher?

      And why are you even reading this comic if you want mature characters?

  55. wakeangel2001
    wakeangel2001
    July 2, 2019 at 1:05 pm | #

    So is she just soliloquizing in the hallway or is she talking loud enough to expect the other 2 to hear her clearly?

    • Bicycle Bill
      Bicycle Bill
      July 2, 2019 at 4:00 pm | #

      Both.

  56. Roborat
    Roborat
    July 2, 2019 at 4:37 pm | #

    She obviously has forgotten the first rule of villainy, don’t monologue.

  57. lioxdz
    lioxdz
    July 2, 2019 at 6:01 pm | #

    got damn Malaya is a fuckin snack

  58. Kyle
    Kyle
    July 2, 2019 at 8:11 pm | #

    malaya you are so stupid i love you

  59. Lacuna
    Lacuna
    July 2, 2019 at 9:23 pm | #

    …what was that podcast even about?

    Like what subject matter requires an in-depth and thoughtful opinion from Malaya?

  60. He Who Abides
    He Who Abides
    July 2, 2019 at 10:28 pm | #

    Cue Malaya getting played like a one note song in 3, 2, 1 . . .

  61. Jhon
    Jhon
    July 3, 2019 at 12:08 am | #

    Malaya makes me glad we have Mary around.
    And I just now noticed that Malaya has been wearing wristbands.
    Don’t remember anyone commenting on that.

  62. Aprion
    Aprion
    July 3, 2019 at 1:29 am | #

    Arrogance thy name is Malaya.

  63. Tacos
    Tacos
    July 3, 2019 at 7:41 pm | #

    Yes senses like a hawk. A blind as fuck hawk.

More Asma?

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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
I think you mean Poop. Prints don't drop from the butt.
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danschkade.bsky.social's user avatar
Dan Schkade @danschkade.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
Happy Nonbinary People's Day, you gemstones. A year or two back we introduced FLASH GORDON's first enby, the outlaw lawman Bones Malock. Having known and loved a lot of nonbinary people, I knew the truest way to represent you was as a unsettling desert pirate with a lightning sword
Flash Gordon's Bones Malock:
Bones Malock, under captions reading:
Bones Malock and Flash Gordon.

Flash: Okay... wait thirty seconds, then give me a distraction.

Bones: Got just the thing.

Flash: Do NOT blow the place up.

Bones: You're the boss.
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Hannah Who @notablyuncool.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
Happy International Non-Binary People's Day to all those who work, create, parent, protest, love and live without ever fitting into someone else's category.
header image - a yellow purple and black flag flies in the wind
media.tenor.com
a yellow purple and black flag flies in the wind
Alt: Non-binary flag blowing in the wind
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Haus of Decline @hausofdecline.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
A blond female Philly Phanatic says
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Bits @bitshammer.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
Mood
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Jacob @jacobaugust.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
Nice.
A screenshot of the Dumbing of Age archives, showing the chapter titles of Book 15 and their respective number of strips. Chapter 4,
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DaisyFM ✒︎ @daisyfm.net ⋅ 3d
Okay, everyone's jumping to conclusions, but Joyce was hit with a mysterious pink gas in Thursday's strip. Now, in recent years, the police are known to increasingly use military grade weapons. Which reminded me of this bit of proposed technology from the 1990s: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gay_bomb
en.wikipedia.org
Gay bomb - Wikipedia
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damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
I ain't readin' all that!
damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatarDavid M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
Dumbing of Age: "LIVE JOCELYNE REACTION" www.dumbingofage.com/2025/comic/b... #webcomics #webcomic
www.dumbingofage.com
LIVE JOCELYNE REACTION
that's not the end!  there's more tomorrow, already on patreon!...
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damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
Dumbing of Age: "LIVE JOCELYNE REACTION" www.dumbingofage.com/2025/comic/b... #webcomics #webcomic
www.dumbingofage.com
LIVE JOCELYNE REACTION
that's not the end!  there's more tomorrow, already on patreon!...
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Jay Edidin @edidin.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
hey, kid, what do you want to play with from the cool superhero movie? is it a nude, melting senator who feels like a stretch armstrong doll that has been left out in the son and maybe mildly chewed by a neighborhood dog? WELL, SON, YOU'RE IN LUCK!
the most upsetting toy of all time: a small and horrible statue of melting, nude Senator Kelly from the first x-men film
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Brendel @brendelbored.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
James Gunn i demand u bring back Conservative Superman
Superman shaking Jared Fogle’s hand
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damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
(July 10, 2026)
Sal and Danny saw you from across the room and enjoy your vibe.
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