Dumbing of Age Book Twelve

Dumbing of Age

A college webcomic by David Willis
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July 11, 2026

Tissue

by David M Willis on March 2, 2012 at 12:01 am
  • 02 - Choosing My Religion
└ Tags: danny, joe

Discussion (231) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. Mkvenner
    Mkvenner
    March 2, 2012 at 12:02 am | #

    ……………………………………………I’ve got nothing.

    • darcos0
      darcos0
      March 2, 2012 at 1:04 am | #

      Says the person with the Billie avatar.

      For all the college-bound guys out there: if a half-asian wants to do it within 8 sentences of talking between the two of you, you don’t turn it down, but wear a condom.

      You can say Danny’s eyes in the last 2 panels are either weird or perfect, cuz that’s a fairly large amount of movement on the face.

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        March 2, 2012 at 3:56 am | #

        Well it’s not everyday when somebody cockblocks themselves.

        • Marr
          Marr
          March 2, 2012 at 4:44 am | #

          Some of us spent most of our life cock-blocking ourselves as the helpful guy friend that every female friend would come talk to about why their Boyfriend was acting like an A-hole (shock because he is an A-holethat for some reason you keep going back to.

          We decided we are your friend and aren’t going to take advantage of someone who seems vulnerable. just like we wouldn’t try to take advantage of someone who is obviously blitz beyond rational thought.. Nope, we walk you home help you with your problems and you drop us as even a friend when you find your knew sex partner because, he gets jealous of us, or accuses you of liking us more.

          • Jar
            Jar
            March 2, 2012 at 8:02 am | #

            I love some Nice Guy Syndrome in the morning. It sounds like your female friends are in abusive relationships. Do you know how hard it is to leave those? Maybe that’s why they keep going back.
            Maybe you could stop treating your female friends as infants. What does “take advantage of’ even mean here? If it is consensual and you aren’t pressuring them, then they haven’t been taken advantage of.
            Frankly, helping friends with problems and talking to them is what friends do. I’m female and I have to do those things for my female friends because that’s how it works.
            Your last sentence is what really makes me thing your friends might have abusive partners. You do realize that that’s what abusive people do, right? They try to alienate you from anyone outside the relationship.
            Also, you seem to be implying that every girl does this, which I really hope you are not.

            • James
              James
              March 2, 2012 at 10:57 am | #

              But if you stay FRIENDS with a girl they like expect you to DO stuff for them and NOT GIVE SEX IN RETURN! You might not get ANYTHING in return except the knowlege that you’re being a good friend and helping them! And being friends is SUCH A BURDENZOMG.

              …yeah, I’ve actually seen more or less that used to defend the whole ‘friendzone’ complaint. >.>

            • Blob Marley
              Blob Marley
              March 2, 2012 at 5:12 pm | #

              What constitutes “pressure” or “taking advantage of” is difficult to nail down. It’s not like there’s a big flashing sign over her head saying “I’m not making good decisions right now.” This is exacerbated by the fact that what was consensual during the act can be relabeled as “rape” by a regretful woman the next day. Even a false rape accusation is damning, and the legal system and most colleges are decidedly “assume guilt” about allegations of men raping women. It’s not healthy to go around assuming that every hookup you have is a potential gateway to criminal charges, but when there’s any doubt about whether she’s willing, a lot of guys will choose to err on the side of caution.

              • Jar
                Jar
                March 2, 2012 at 6:02 pm | #

                Actual false rape accusations are rare. I’m sure consensual acts COULD be relabeled by a regretful women, but this isn’t a commonplace thing, and being afraid of a rape accusation is not the same thing as being afraid of taking advantage of someone, as was the original commentor’s point, so I’m not sure why you’re bringing it up.

                • Blob Marley
                  Blob Marley
                  March 2, 2012 at 7:09 pm | #

                  They’re not the same thing, but they’re certainly related. Even if nobody ever files criminal charges, what kind of a reputation do you stand to gain by having sex with someone who’s in a vulnerable state? It sets you up for potentially damaging social consequences as well as legal ones.

                • Jar
                  Jar
                  March 3, 2012 at 1:57 pm | #

                  Well, no, not really. Bille was not in a vunerable state. Bille wanted to have sex. And the other commentor didn’t mention fake rape accusations so I really don’t see why you’re bringing it up.

            • Marr
              Marr
              March 2, 2012 at 7:03 pm | #

              The point was cock-blocking yourself. Which is where the whole nice guy syndrome comes from. The problem comes in because nice guys are looking for a longer term relationship. They are nice to the girls and talk to them about their problems because they are basically insecure enough in themselves that they don’t believe that the girl would be interested in them except to talk to. So instead of risking the friendship on what would possibly be a rebuffed advance they don’t do anything but there for the person hoping they will see.
              But most women aren’t attracted to guys with low confidence, which is something abusers and d-bags have in spades. it is probably just as well in the long run, because most guys with low confidence do everything they can for who ever they and tend to get taken advantage of until they learn to be as selfish as everyone else.

              • Somebody
                Somebody
                March 2, 2012 at 11:26 pm | #

                Being supportive doesn’t mean you lack confidence. And that last sentence is rather pessimistic.

              • nekobawt
                nekobawt
                March 3, 2012 at 12:22 am | #

                “most [mentally healthy people] aren’t attracted to [people] with low confidence”

                fixed it for you.

                but, isn’t that a good thing, though? i mean…never mind social darwinism or whatever. personally i find the concept of anyone being attracted to low self-confidence kinda skeevy and predatory, whether the attraction comes from a woman, man, or anyone in between. i mean…think about it. what the hell kind of a message is “i love you and/or want to fuck you because you hate yourself”…?

                • johannhowitzer
                  johannhowitzer
                  March 4, 2012 at 3:52 am | #

                  I’m not sure that follows. I personally have been in three relationships with women who had low self-esteem, and in every case, I was absolutely thrilled to help them improve in that area by building them up. It was like watching a flower bloom. One of the best parts of relationships is learning from each other.

                  Re: the “nice guy” syndrome, I used to have that in spades, and the solution for me wasn’t “grow a pair and woo ze women,” it was, “change the way I think so fundamentally that I’m not pining for a relationship anymore and am generally happy with who I am and where I am.” Sure, if a woman came along and I could see a future, I’d be happy, but it’s no longer a crucial (and missing) component of my happiness.

                  The irony is that as I grow in this way, I’m finding more and more women are beating down my door… just not any so far that I can see a future with! Thus the “nice guy” syndrome and the mentality that goes with it both strike me as putting the cart before the horse.

          • skies
            skies
            March 2, 2012 at 8:28 am | #

            oh look it’s a Nice Guy.

            • Rowen Morland
              Rowen Morland
              March 2, 2012 at 10:01 am | #

              Meh at least it’s not a “why won’t she sleep with mee” nice guy. Its more of a “dang why isn’t it easier to be friends with the opposite sex” kinda thing.

              I can’t say I appreciate it when a partner of mine or of a friend trys to break up a friendship.

              • Somebody
                Somebody
                March 2, 2012 at 11:28 pm | #

                You…would rather someone wasn’t nice? Does not compute.

                • Heather
                  Heather
                  March 3, 2012 at 5:45 am | #

                  The “Nice Guy” with the capitals is actually a concept in which a guy THINKS he’s nice, or respectful of women or whatever but actually isn’t. He’s not really ‘nice’ at all, but thinks he is. Thus a “Nice Guy” rather than a genuine guy who happens to be a nice person. Calling them that is more a sarcastic name, because of how they often think about themselves (that they’re nice) isn’t in fact what they are in reality. They’re just passive-aggressive jerks in comparison to the jerks they often complain about girls dating instead of them.

                • Heather
                  Heather
                  March 3, 2012 at 5:46 am | #

                  Wow, I just realised I made a lot of redundant statements. So that was longer than it should have been. Sorry about that.

                • johannhowitzer
                  johannhowitzer
                  March 4, 2012 at 3:59 am | #

                  Um, yes and no. Maybe some of the “nice guys” you’ve met have been like that, but I personally have encountered many “nice guys” who aren’t “passive-aggressive jerks.” They’re not waiting around for some girl to stop dating that jerk so they can move in, but that doesn’t lessen the frustration. One guy I know by the name of Zack is one of the most amazing men I know, and he’s a go-getter, not passive-agressive in the slightest and treats everyone kindly without thought of any reward. And he’s single. None of his friends can figure out why – go figure, that includes some very eligible women he’d make very happy.

                  In my experience, women are looking for some sort of intangible “spark.” There are several women whose honor I trust above my own, who I know will shoot straight with me and not sugarcoat the truth, who have told me exactly the things about me they respect and admire, but that “you feel like my brother.” In other words, I am exactly the kind of man they want, except they don’t want me specifically.

                  Maybe you can understand why this would be frustrating to a guy?

                • Doop
                  Doop
                  March 4, 2012 at 5:33 am | #

                  Sure, it can be frustrating to a man… but it’s not as if it’s ONLY men who go through this and women are just irrational or something. Nearly everyone, male or female, has at some point been rejected by someone who only sees them as a friend, hence Taylor Swift’s success among teen girls with “You Belong With Me.”

                  The problem I have with it is that people attribute rejection to one gender. Women can and are rejected too, especially in this day and age.

                • Oberon
                  Oberon
                  March 6, 2012 at 8:20 pm | #

                  Zack is probably gay. Not that there’s anything wrong with that…

                • Petre Pan
                  Petre Pan
                  October 8, 2012 at 9:22 pm | #

                  @ Oberon Why’s he gotta be gay? He could just be saving it. That’s what my fiance was doing, and he’s pretty much like Zack.

                • DarkVeghetta
                  DarkVeghetta
                  June 18, 2015 at 1:41 pm | #

                  Odd thing is I can and have grown attracted to someone that treats me very nicely (and is of the appropriate sex). Sadly most people aren’t pansexual, hence nice guys tend to get the short end of the stick until they learn how to attract a mate.

    • Canvas Hat
      Canvas Hat
      March 3, 2012 at 11:00 am | #

      Was I the only on who imagined Joe saying SHAZAM!!! when he gave Danny the tissue?

      • MichaelHaneline
        MichaelHaneline
        March 3, 2012 at 1:36 pm | #

        See my response below.

    • Canvas Hat
      Canvas Hat
      March 3, 2012 at 11:00 am | #

      Was I the only on who imagined Joe saying SHAZAM!!! when he gave Danny the tissue?

      • MichaelHaneline
        MichaelHaneline
        March 3, 2012 at 1:37 pm | #

        See my response above.

        • Tristan J
          Tristan J
          March 4, 2012 at 2:21 am | #

          *dies laughing*

    • Hinoron
      Hinoron
      July 15, 2013 at 9:09 pm | #

      Aaaand that’s why I never lived in residence. 😛
      I didn’t have the cash back then to spend on the really good headphones. 😛

  2. OhHayMike
    OhHayMike
    March 2, 2012 at 12:02 am | #

    What a great, yet slightly disturbing roommate.

  3. mechaqua
    mechaqua
    March 2, 2012 at 12:02 am | #

    So Joe is a good friend??

    • Aeron
      Aeron
      March 2, 2012 at 12:11 am | #

      Good friend or not, he’s apparently been in this situation before.

    • Kryss LaBryn
      Kryss LaBryn
      March 2, 2012 at 4:45 pm | #

      Joe is an EXCELLENT friend.

    • lazarusLong
      lazarusLong
      March 2, 2012 at 6:58 pm | #

      Joe to the rescue!

      • yeap.
        yeap.
        March 2, 2012 at 9:04 pm | #

        with his penis.

        • Anne Onymous
          Anne Onymous
          March 3, 2012 at 3:47 am | #

          for a nickel.

          • Usayasha
            Usayasha
            March 4, 2012 at 10:27 pm | #

            I don’t think this is going to end any time soon.

            • Roborat
              Roborat
              March 5, 2012 at 5:40 pm | #

              It had better, he only has 5 minutes.

  4. Jen Aside
    Jen Aside
    March 2, 2012 at 12:03 am | #

    Wished he’d banged that chick… a little?? Either all the way or nothing, dude!

    • das-g
      das-g
      March 4, 2012 at 5:27 pm | #

      “wished a little” not “banged a little”, I assume …

  5. Wack'd
    Wack'd
    March 2, 2012 at 12:03 am | #

    Do I WANT to know what X9 is?

    • mechaqua
      mechaqua
      March 2, 2012 at 12:03 am | #

      Its ummm… better then X8!

    • Nexev
      Nexev
      March 2, 2012 at 12:04 am | #

      Isn’t it like, that Robot girl?

      What a odd crossover.

      • Aizat
        Aizat
        March 2, 2012 at 12:07 am | #

        That’s XJ9. X9 is a comic strip.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      March 2, 2012 at 12:05 am | #

      Something like K.Y?

      • Marr
        Marr
        March 2, 2012 at 4:45 am | #

        KY introducing a new line of jams, according to the onion.

        • sidhe3141
          sidhe3141
          March 2, 2012 at 6:03 pm | #

          Apparently you can slip right into… nah, too easy.

    • Bekah
      Bekah
      March 2, 2012 at 12:12 am | #

      I’m wondering how context isn’t giving it away.

    • ryan
      ryan
      March 2, 2012 at 8:35 am | #

      i think X9 is one of those mega man games. maybe the one with the bosses named after guns n’ roses?

      • Zap Rowsdower
        Zap Rowsdower
        March 2, 2012 at 2:06 pm | #

        No, that was X5 if I recall correctly, and they never went past 8 in the X series.

  6. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    March 2, 2012 at 12:03 am | #

    “It takes two hands to handle a whopper!”

    • mechaqua
      mechaqua
      March 2, 2012 at 12:04 am | #

      Looks like Joe gave Danny some secret sauce to put on his hot dog!

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        March 2, 2012 at 12:09 am | #

        It’s a pity he doesn’t have Billie’s buns to slip his weiner into.

        • fellixe
          fellixe
          March 2, 2012 at 10:50 am | #

          Confusion Say: Man who go to bed with sex problem on mind wake up with SOLUTION on hand.

          • johannhowitzer
            johannhowitzer
            March 4, 2012 at 4:02 am | #

            I was gonna correct you on misspelling Confucius, but “Confusion” works so well…

    • Aizat
      Aizat
      March 2, 2012 at 12:06 am | #

      The burger or the fish?

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        March 2, 2012 at 12:18 am | #

        There’s a fish option??

        • Aizat
          Aizat
          March 2, 2012 at 12:22 am | #

          Yes, yes they have.

    • Mkvenner
      Mkvenner
      March 2, 2012 at 12:07 am | #

      And Joe is White castle.

      • Mkvenner
        Mkvenner
        March 2, 2012 at 11:00 am | #

        Was that too subtle?

  7. Nexev
    Nexev
    March 2, 2012 at 12:03 am | #

    Joe sure is helping a bro.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      March 2, 2012 at 3:57 am | #

      Just as long as it’s not ‘hands-on’help, that would be creepy.

      • TheBenenator
        TheBenenator
        March 2, 2012 at 5:42 am | #

        Damn it, now you’ve invoked Rule 34.

        • James
          James
          March 2, 2012 at 10:59 am | #

          You’re suggesting Danny/Joe R34 wasn’t in existence before this?

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          March 2, 2012 at 3:46 pm | #

          James is right, it(Danny/Joe R34) certainly has existed for some time.

          • TheBenenator
            TheBenenator
            March 2, 2012 at 11:25 pm | #

            I wouldn’t know, for multiple reasons. 😉

  8. Aizat
    Aizat
    March 2, 2012 at 12:04 am | #

    What, like you never do it, Joe?

  9. Wonder Wig
    Wonder Wig
    March 2, 2012 at 12:06 am | #

    Why not just leave the room Joe? D=

    • Aydr
      Aydr
      March 2, 2012 at 12:10 am | #

      Because he’s going to get his harness and jockstrap, duh. Joe is one kinky fucker.

      Not very good at this though. 5 minutes? Guess that explains why he goes through so many girls, though. Same total time higher number of women.

      • Bekah
        Bekah
        March 2, 2012 at 12:13 am | #

        I dunno… my boyfriend can finish himself off pretty quick.

        (it is only the anonymity of the internet that allows me to say that)

        • katzgoboom
          katzgoboom
          March 2, 2012 at 12:17 pm | #

          Samesies, though. Boyfriend by himself = a few minutes. Boyfriend with me? Fuck we play around and by the time he’s done, we’ve been at it for an hour. Granted, my boyfriend can go multiple consecutive rounds (as in, cum and then keep going) so he’s also “finished himself off” several times by the end of it and then he’s kind of just a puddle of goo laying there.

      • Gordon
        Gordon
        March 2, 2012 at 12:31 am | #

        When you’re flying solo, it’s a lot faster to get from point A to point B.

        • Marr
          Marr
          March 2, 2012 at 4:49 am | #

          it doesn’t have to be, you can play hard to get with your self, take yourself out for a romantic dinner for one and then deal with your Right hand think you are cheating on it with you left and then go out and buy it some nice lingerie, like a silk and lace glove.

          You don’t always have to treat your hand like a 25 cent whore.

        • Aydr
          Aydr
          March 2, 2012 at 9:34 am | #

          Who said anything about flying solo? Looks to me like Joe’s stickin’ around.

          • fellixe
            fellixe
            March 2, 2012 at 10:57 am | #

            Looks like he’s expecting Danny to do the ‘sticking’ around’, he’s just going to chill in a neutral corner.

    • Rognik
      Rognik
      March 2, 2012 at 1:21 am | #

      I’m just hoping that IS their dorm room still. For some reason, I just can’t be certain. Maybe it’s that chair.

  10. Shade
    Shade
    March 2, 2012 at 12:07 am | #

    You know it’s funny, for the longest time I had no idea why American shows made jokes about needing lubricant for that particular activity.

    Don’t worry, I’ve hooked up with a Yank since then and I’m now aware of why.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      March 2, 2012 at 12:10 am | #

      Oh do tell! 😀

      • Gordon
        Gordon
        March 2, 2012 at 12:32 am | #

        Circumcision.

        • Shade
          Shade
          March 2, 2012 at 4:35 pm | #

          Yeup, what Gordon said.

          As for the relationship “hooked up” probably makes it sound raunchier then it is. We were good firends for many years and just became a couple so gradually we’re not even sure when the anniversary is.

        • Ben
          Ben
          March 2, 2012 at 4:43 pm | #

          It all makes sense now..

          • johannhowitzer
            johannhowitzer
            March 4, 2012 at 4:04 am | #

            Oh gosh the gravatar…

      • Kernanator
        Kernanator
        March 2, 2012 at 12:33 am | #

        Oh come on, is this another Plasma original?

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          March 2, 2012 at 1:00 am | #

          Not this time Kerny, today’s grav is Ryo Akizuki, the trapalicious boy from Idolmaster.

          • Kernanator
            Kernanator
            March 2, 2012 at 1:04 am | #

            Oh god, I feel so sexually confused just looking at him.

            • Plasma Mongoose
              Plasma Mongoose
              March 2, 2012 at 1:22 am | #

              That’s why ‘traps’ are so dangerous yet oddly fasinating. 😀

              • fellixe
                fellixe
                March 2, 2012 at 11:01 am | #

                I’m ashamed of you all! Shade actually said “hooked up with a Yank” and you’re just going to leave that hanging?!?

                *Storms off in a fake tizzy

                • Plasma Mongoose
                  Plasma Mongoose
                  March 2, 2012 at 3:49 pm | #

                  Am I missing something?? What’s the big deal about “hooking up with a Yank”?

                • Shade
                  Shade
                  March 2, 2012 at 5:31 pm | #

                  I dunno and I’m the one who did it.

                • Oberon
                  Oberon
                  March 3, 2012 at 4:26 pm | #

                  I believe that some people are overlooking the double meaning of Yank. Would it help if it were not capitalized?

              • HelenKellersDog
                HelenKellersDog
                March 2, 2012 at 12:13 pm | #

                Where’s Admiral Ackbar when you need him?

    • Rognik
      Rognik
      March 2, 2012 at 1:22 am | #

      So what country do you hail from, and how do you do it? (Or do I really want to know?)

      • Alden
        Alden
        March 2, 2012 at 4:36 am | #

        Sandpaper?

        • Tristan J
          Tristan J
          March 4, 2012 at 2:30 am | #

          He said he’s from Australia, so that sounds right.

      • Shade
        Shade
        March 2, 2012 at 8:33 pm | #

        Australia and here circumcision isn’t as widely practiced.

        It works much the same only you don’t need lubricant because you’re not missing the foreskin so it doesn’t dry out.

        • What?
          What?
          March 3, 2012 at 1:50 am | #

          Oh good that makes so much sense now. Up until now I thought I’d been doing it wrong.

        • Jetstream
          Jetstream
          March 4, 2012 at 1:09 am | #

          It isn’t really as widely practiced in the USA anymore either. It used to be a law in most states. I don’t think it is anywhere in the States anymore.

          • Shade
            Shade
            March 4, 2012 at 3:44 am | #

            Yeah I heard about that, string of lawsuits by the parents or something wasn’t it? At the end of the day it is still more common in the USA.

            • Jetstream
              Jetstream
              March 5, 2012 at 1:13 am | #

              Actually I was looking it up, and apparently more than 50% of Australian men (in 2002 at least) were also circumcised.

  11. Ridureyu
    Ridureyu
    March 2, 2012 at 12:09 am | #

    MOST EMBARRASSING MOMENT IN COLLEGE:

    It was late at night, my roommate and I had turned in, and there was an itch on my back that I just…couldn’t…REACH. SO I reached, turned, twisted, scratched, strained, and tried to scratch that itch. And then, my roommate asked,

    “Are you masturbating?”

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      March 2, 2012 at 12:13 am | #

      If only you had the Bear Scratch.

      • Jetstream
        Jetstream
        March 4, 2012 at 1:07 am | #

        Why is this a thing that exists? WHY!?

    • Kernanator
      Kernanator
      March 2, 2012 at 12:37 am | #

      You think that’s bad? Try actually walking in on your roommate spanking the sausage.

      • Ridureyu
        Ridureyu
        March 2, 2012 at 12:43 am | #

        I actually had pretty good roommates all throughout college. Well, except for Ben the Asshole, although he was pretty nice to me, at least. And gone after one semester.

        • Azukar
          Azukar
          March 2, 2012 at 6:38 am | #

          Well honestly, with a name like Ben the Asshole, what did you expect?

          • Inarai
            Inarai
            March 2, 2012 at 11:13 am | #

            I do hope that when his parents filed for the birth certificate, they at least got a very stern “seriously?” glare.

          • Ridureyu
            Ridureyu
            March 2, 2012 at 2:38 pm | #

            Maybe the goatse guy?

      • iSaidCandleja-
        iSaidCandleja-
        March 2, 2012 at 12:59 am | #

        I wouldn’t think walking in on your roommate to be bad at all. What’s bad is waking up to your roommate having sex. What’s worse is knowing you went to sleep with nobody else around.

        • Kernanator
          Kernanator
          March 2, 2012 at 1:07 am | #

          Okay, yeah, you win the Awkwardness Contest.

          • iSaidCandleja-
            iSaidCandleja-
            March 2, 2012 at 1:22 am | #

            It would have been more awkward if I couldn’t get back to sleep. It also helps that everyone was mutual friends and it makes for a great story after the fact.

          • Plasma Mongoose
            Plasma Mongoose
            March 2, 2012 at 1:26 am | #

            It ain’t awkward until you walk into your grandma’s bedroom doing it with a man who is NOT your grandpa.

            And Brain Bleach wasn’t invented yet back then.

            • iSaidCandleja-
              iSaidCandleja-
              March 2, 2012 at 1:27 am | #

              …
              …
              Wow.

              • Plasma Mongoose
                Plasma Mongoose
                March 2, 2012 at 1:29 am | #

                I bet there is a foreign word that fits way better than awkward in that situation but I don’t know it yet.

                • Oberon
                  Oberon
                  March 3, 2012 at 4:33 pm | #

                  Perhaps caramba?

                  ca·ram·ba/kəˈrämbə/
                  Exclamation:
                  An expression of surprise or dismay.

            • Plasma Mongoose
              Plasma Mongoose
              March 2, 2012 at 1:28 am | #

              …grandma’s bedroom with her doing it…

              • Shippy McShipper
                Shippy McShipper
                March 2, 2012 at 8:40 pm | #

                Yeah, you left me thinking “wait, wouldn’t it be worse if he WAS your grandpa?”

                • Plasma Mongoose
                  Plasma Mongoose
                  March 3, 2012 at 3:59 pm | #

                  NO, having your grandma commit adultery makes it worse.

        • lightsabermario
          lightsabermario
          March 2, 2012 at 2:33 am | #

          How about this for awkwardness: I was in the same situation as Candleja, I had gone to sleep, and they were sitting on the couch talking baby talk to each other as always. Harmless enough, right? So I went to sleep in my bottom bunk, and guess what I woke up to? Shaking. In the TOP BUNK. With two pairs of feet sticking off the side. So incredibly awkward. I stayed there perfectly still pretending to be asleep for the whole time until they finished, got dressed and left the room, and finally I could get up. I can still remember the grunts and moans.

          • Melizza
            Melizza
            March 2, 2012 at 7:09 am | #

            Wow dude…I could understand thats awkward, but I honestly would’ve stood up while they were in the middle of having sex, and walked away.

            • iSaidCandleja-
              iSaidCandleja-
              March 2, 2012 at 12:47 pm | #

              That’s a good way to leave them mortified.

              A friend once suggested that, if you’re in this situation and want to stop the hanky panky, you should simply announce that you will be masturbating to their sounds. If they don’t stop, you should fake an orgasm loud enough for them to hear (my friend was doing this to people in another room, so that “orgasm” was way over the top). Bonus points if your “orgasm” occurs at the same time as one of them.

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        March 2, 2012 at 1:08 am | #

        During the last century, I had a flatmate whose bedroom floor was covered in funky-smelling ’tisshrooms’.

        I think you can guess what ’tisshrooms’ are.

        YEEK!

        • iSaidCandleja-
          iSaidCandleja-
          March 2, 2012 at 1:26 am | #

          How long do tisshrooms stay around?

          And thank you, Plasma, for making consider the possibilities of using funky-smelling tissue as a growth medium.

          • Plasma Mongoose
            Plasma Mongoose
            March 2, 2012 at 1:31 am | #

            Any time on the floor instead of inside a tightly wrapped plastic bag is too long.

            • Hannover Fist
              Hannover Fist
              March 2, 2012 at 6:34 am | #

              Would eating a tisshroom get you high?

              • Plasma Mongoose
                Plasma Mongoose
                March 2, 2012 at 6:51 am | #

                As far as I am aware, dried semen has never been used as a narcotic but it was, all men would face drug posssession laws.

              • Tualha
                Tualha
                March 2, 2012 at 6:56 am | #

                Try it and report back to us.

      • Dragon Nataku
        Dragon Nataku
        March 2, 2012 at 8:53 am | #

        Try having your fat hooker of a roommate banging random dudes in the bunk directly under you every other night ^=__=^;;

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          March 2, 2012 at 3:54 pm | #

          I hope for your health’s sake that they’re not doing it on the top bunk.

  12. Ravux
    Ravux
    March 2, 2012 at 12:10 am | #

    It appears Joe is implying Danny should do something with that lubricant and box of tissues in the span of five minutes. I wonder what it could be!

    • Mnk
      Mnk
      March 2, 2012 at 12:13 am | #

      Perhaps some sort of art project, in order to express his feelings!

      • mechaqua
        mechaqua
        March 2, 2012 at 12:18 am | #

        I am sure Danny will have an explosion of creative ideas!

        • Tualha
          Tualha
          March 2, 2012 at 6:57 am | #

          ITYM seminal concepts.

        • chumpersonable
          chumpersonable
          March 2, 2012 at 12:14 pm | #

          Oh, there will be an explosion, alright.

      • Gordon
        Gordon
        March 2, 2012 at 12:22 am | #

        Depending on his diet and aim, he could make a decent, if small, abstract piece, I suppose.

        • Wizard
          Wizard
          March 2, 2012 at 12:39 am | #

          Jacksoff Pollock.

          • Plasma Mongoose
            Plasma Mongoose
            March 2, 2012 at 1:09 am | #

            But is it art? 😛

            • fellixe
              fellixe
              March 2, 2012 at 11:07 am | #

              Could’ve been. But without a healthy ova and a fertile womb we’ll never get to meet little Arthur now.

    • captainswift
      captainswift
      March 2, 2012 at 12:21 am | #

      Low rent papier mache, probably

    • ALostProphet
      ALostProphet
      March 2, 2012 at 12:24 am | #

      Very slippery papier mache?

    • Bill M.
      Bill M.
      March 2, 2012 at 1:28 pm | #

      Not much, really. 5 minutes in I’m just starting to get the right feel with the friction.

  13. J.T.
    J.T.
    March 2, 2012 at 12:17 am | #

    Alternately Joe puts on the earmuffs and goggles then reaches for Danny’s junk. Punchline still works.

    • iSaidCandleja-
      iSaidCandleja-
      March 2, 2012 at 12:24 am | #

      I’m sorry, what are the earmuffs and goggles for in this scenario?

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        March 2, 2012 at 1:09 am | #

        PROTECTION!

        • Marr
          Marr
          March 2, 2012 at 4:52 am | #

          it’s always fun till someone gets shot in the eye.

          • Dragon Nataku
            Dragon Nataku
            March 2, 2012 at 8:58 am | #

            That’s how you get eye herpes~

            • iSaidCandleja-
              iSaidCandleja-
              March 2, 2012 at 12:40 pm | #

              That’s not funny, my brother has eye herpes!

              I’m just joking, it’s hilarious. But he really does have eye herpes.

              • Marr
                Marr
                March 2, 2012 at 5:56 pm | #

                Knew a guy, not really a friend, who got crabs in his eyes getting too close to the goods with his face without eye protection.

      • Rognik
        Rognik
        March 2, 2012 at 1:27 am | #

        See no evil, hear no evil. For both the comic and JT’s proposals.

    • Phillip Wilde
      Phillip Wilde
      March 2, 2012 at 10:02 am | #

      ALL THE AWARDS.

  14. TheTJ
    TheTJ
    March 2, 2012 at 12:19 am | #

    Always a class act, Joe is.

    Also, at first I thought it read “K-9” and thought of Doctor Who. That just made it worse.

    • David
      David M Willis
      March 2, 2012 at 12:30 am | #

      “X9” could be seen as a reference to Ravage, who’s a robot cat, so that’s kind of a lateral move.

    • Rognik
      Rognik
      March 2, 2012 at 1:28 am | #

      Affirmative, Master.

    • James
      James
      March 2, 2012 at 11:08 am | #

      Pshaw. The Doctor has the sonic screwdriver for THAT.

      • Blue
        Blue
        March 2, 2012 at 2:24 pm | #

        But it doesn’t do wood!

        • Anne Onymous
          Anne Onymous
          March 3, 2012 at 3:58 am | #

          WIN.

          • Blue
            Blue
            March 4, 2012 at 1:28 am | #

            Can’t take credit, it was my gf who came up with that one. xD

            But thanks!

  15. Aizat
    Aizat
    March 2, 2012 at 12:21 am | #

    Hand lotion? All I need is a stimulus. No lotion required.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      March 2, 2012 at 1:15 am | #

      Oh, so that’s what that ‘Stimulus Package’ they keep talking about on the news is all about…

      • fellixe
        fellixe
        March 2, 2012 at 11:10 am | #

        Oh, yeah! Break out the Stimulus Package and engage in a little Quantitative Easing!

      • Zap Rowsdower
        Zap Rowsdower
        March 2, 2012 at 2:09 pm | #

        Unfortunately, its showing signs of being a temporary fix that won’t stave off Depression unless the actual cause is dealt with.

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          March 2, 2012 at 3:57 pm | #

          The Economy needs to get laid, preferably buy a rich sugar-daddy.

          • Plasma Mongoose
            Plasma Mongoose
            March 2, 2012 at 3:57 pm | #

            buy = by

          • johannhowitzer
            johannhowitzer
            March 4, 2012 at 4:13 am | #

            So, what, Japan?

            • Plasma Mongoose
              Plasma Mongoose
              March 4, 2012 at 7:24 am | #

              More like China these days, Japan has been going downhill since the 90s.

  16. ALostProphet
    ALostProphet
    March 2, 2012 at 12:23 am | #

    At first, I had the sneaking suspicion that Joe’s super-horndog nature was a cover for something deeper, but that didn’t seem likely as we got to know him. Now? Now I’m legitimately doubting he’s entirely hetero.

    As much of a funny punchline as it is, he’s still intending to be in the room. That’s a serious eyebrow-raiser

    • Aizat
      Aizat
      March 2, 2012 at 12:24 am | #

      Maybe he needs to sleep.

    • iSaidCandleja-
      iSaidCandleja-
      March 2, 2012 at 12:26 am | #

      Or it just never occured to him that he cares about privacy less than Danny does.

      • madock345
        madock345
        March 2, 2012 at 12:15 pm | #

        So true, I had some roommates who thought that a good roommate is one that you could do anything with/near them as you would do on your own.

  17. Lumino
    Lumino
    March 2, 2012 at 12:26 am | #

    Joeseph Rosenthal – Ultimate Bro

  18. mechaqua
    mechaqua
    March 2, 2012 at 12:28 am | #

    Any one getting a Terminator meets the matrix vibe from Joe?

    • Kernanator
      Kernanator
      March 2, 2012 at 12:34 am | #

      I’ll be back. To fook you.

      • Maycroft
        Maycroft
        March 2, 2012 at 12:39 am | #

        “You take the blue pill, and I’ll show you how hard is the…”
        ok can’t do it.

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          March 2, 2012 at 1:12 am | #

          “You will cum with me if you want to live.”

          Subtlety is over-rated. 😛

          • Kernanator
            Kernanator
            March 2, 2012 at 2:07 am | #

            Wow.

            That’s about as subtle as a shotgun to the face.

            • Plasma Mongoose
              Plasma Mongoose
              March 2, 2012 at 4:01 am | #

              BOOM! CUMSHOT! 😛

              • Aizat
                Aizat
                March 2, 2012 at 5:11 am | #

                He’ll be cumming around the mountain when he cums.

  19. gaspacho
    gaspacho
    March 2, 2012 at 12:36 am | #

    Dammit, we don’t need this comic turning into Menage a 3. This is a bad road to go down 🙂

    • Jetstream
      Jetstream
      March 4, 2012 at 1:00 am | #

      Don’t worry. I don’t believe Willis is truly capable of being as big a pervert as Giz is.

  20. Ter
    Ter
    March 2, 2012 at 12:38 am | #

    Stay classy, Joe.

  21. Kernanator
    Kernanator
    March 2, 2012 at 12:39 am | #

    You know, it’s moments like these that make me unsure of whether Joe is the best roommate ever or the worst roommate ever.

    • NCP19
      NCP19
      March 2, 2012 at 12:51 am | #

      Why not both?

      • andrew
        andrew
        March 2, 2012 at 12:55 am | #

        Why not Zoidberg?

        • fellixe
          fellixe
          March 2, 2012 at 11:13 am | #

          Wine ought to do it.

  22. JK9000
    JK9000
    March 2, 2012 at 12:54 am | #

    Joe’s not a good friend. A good friend would give you more than 5 minutes.

  23. Rex Hondo
    Rex Hondo
    March 2, 2012 at 1:00 am | #

    Ha ha! Onanism!

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      March 2, 2012 at 1:13 am | #

      Does that count as a religion?

    • Bill M.
      Bill M.
      March 2, 2012 at 1:31 pm | #

      Oh crap, that would be. He did turn down coitus uninterruptus and would now be spilling his seed elsewhere. Bad Danny, no Joyce for you.

    • Zap Rowsdower
      Zap Rowsdower
      March 2, 2012 at 2:11 pm | #

      No, that’s when you refuse to impregnate your dead brother’s wife for him. The sin and shame isn’t sexual, its about being a failure as a Bro.

      • Rex Hondo
        Rex Hondo
        March 2, 2012 at 11:48 pm | #

        Hmm. Until reading Onan’s Wikipedia article, I wasn’t aware of the long-running debate among biblical scholars as to the nature of Onan’s sin. To be honest, I tend to just go with the definition as presented by my good friends Merriam and Webster.

        • David
          David M Willis
          March 3, 2012 at 12:31 am | #

          As a kid who read the Bible on his own a lot, but did so in an environment that wasn’t likely to bring up masturbation ever ever, I found it really odd, later on, discovering that some people thought that story was about it.

          I mean, didn’t they read it? It was clearly about this douchebag who kept pulling out of his sister-in-law.

          • MichaelHaneline
            MichaelHaneline
            March 3, 2012 at 1:42 pm | #

            The whole thing struck me as odd. Onan is fucking his brother’s wife, but Onan pulling out and spilling his seed on the ground is what God took issue with?

            I actually brought this up in religion class in middle school. The nuns did not appreciate my insight.

            • Plasma Mongoose
              Plasma Mongoose
              March 3, 2012 at 3:56 pm | #

              The reason God took issue with it is that God wanted him to impregnate his dead brother’s wife so his brother’s line will continue.

              I’m not sure how that works exactly, maybe God will change the sperm’s DNA or something weird like that.

              • Jetstream
                Jetstream
                March 4, 2012 at 12:59 am | #

                A lot of those rules are really just unsophisticated biological concepts. They’re worried about biodiversity.

                So if your brother dies without ever having any kids with his wife you should knock her up so HER genes will continue. It’s all couched in terms of “continuing your brother’s line” but what it really comes down to is “keep the damn gene pool diverse!”

                The Jews were pretty smart like that. A lot of those big rules were just ways of keeping people from getting sick and from losing population.

          • SHAZAM
            SHAZAM
            February 20, 2013 at 1:49 pm | #

            You were only supposed to impregnate your brothers wife if you weren’t already married right?

      • MichaelHaneline
        MichaelHaneline
        March 3, 2012 at 1:43 pm | #

        Ohhh… I didn’t pick up on the fact that his brother was dead.

        • Bill M.
          Bill M.
          March 7, 2012 at 11:58 am | #

          Yeah, 1st husband Er died because of his own wickedness. Onan marries to become a kinsman-redeemer. After Onan (husband #2) died, she was promised the next son in marriage, but since the father-in-law Judah was thinking she was cursed, he held off, not wanting all his sons dead. Tamar then dressed up as a common prostitute and seduces Judah & conceiving, leading her to be “yet another wicked woman” in Jesus’ genealogy.

      • Heavensrun
        Heavensrun
        March 4, 2012 at 10:56 pm | #

        C’mon, just because the origins of the term don’t sync up with what the story is actually -about- doesn’t mean “onanism” isn’t a word that means wanking it.

  24. Tristan J
    Tristan J
    March 2, 2012 at 1:49 am | #

    …

    I would happily be bros with Joe based just on this.

  25. lightsabermario
    lightsabermario
    March 2, 2012 at 2:41 am | #

    I don’t know about you guys, but for me, just the fact that Joe is aware of it and is permitting it would be beyond awkward enough to make the act impossible. Add the fact that he is still in the room and is conscious for maximum awkwardness.

    The only way to diffuse that much awkwardness is with MAXIMUM RIDICULOSITY!

    • |Agent
      |Agent
      March 2, 2012 at 3:19 am | #

      Awkward Zone Defeated!

      • Lieutenant Dan
        Lieutenant Dan
        March 2, 2012 at 9:10 am | #

        Bros! Bros! Bros!

        • johannhowitzer
          johannhowitzer
          March 4, 2012 at 4:17 am | #

          Smitty is totally fine with this situation.

      • HumanDoctor
        HumanDoctor
        March 2, 2012 at 2:50 pm | #

        That would require fancy costumes though.

        • Shippy McShipper
          Shippy McShipper
          March 2, 2012 at 8:47 pm | #

          The mask and earmuffs not fancy enough for you?

  26. Buckybone
    Buckybone
    March 2, 2012 at 2:46 am | #

    Did I miss something, or was Joe a Boy Scout?

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      March 2, 2012 at 4:07 am | #

      I can see Joe being this kind of Boy Scout.

  27. Oberon
    Oberon
    March 2, 2012 at 4:14 am | #

    5 minutes? As if… Maybe 40 minutes, minimum.

  28. Jack Faire
    Jack Faire
    March 2, 2012 at 7:48 am | #

    I am not sure I want to ever see what is on that flash drive.

    • Bunk
      Bunk
      March 2, 2012 at 9:57 am | #

      That’s no flashdrive. look at it again.

  29. NF
    NF
    March 2, 2012 at 9:53 am | #

    You’re a good man, Joe Rosenthal.

  30. Jehosaphat
    Jehosaphat
    March 2, 2012 at 10:22 am | #

    Grooooooosss.

  31. chumpersonable
    chumpersonable
    March 2, 2012 at 10:34 am | #

    Stay classy, Joe.
    Either that, or be gunned down by a cheesy 80s sci-fi protagonist. Seriously, where did he even get those shades?

    • Bill M.
      Bill M.
      March 2, 2012 at 1:33 pm | #

      Looks like Joe knows its hunting season… and he needs his protection. YEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

  32. MR C
    MR C
    March 2, 2012 at 11:25 am | #

    joe know’s what’s up

  33. HelenKellersDog
    HelenKellersDog
    March 2, 2012 at 12:07 pm | #

    I just finished “Joyce and Walky”… At first I was all “WIIGII”, then I was like T_T

    • HelenKellersDog
      HelenKellersDog
      March 2, 2012 at 12:08 pm | #

      As for DoA, I don’t think Danny is gonna fap while Joe is there… A guy has to have space ya know?
      (or at least a room to himself)

  34. Ari
    Ari
    March 2, 2012 at 2:19 pm | #

    Until the last panel I honestly thought Joe was wearing a fez for some reason.

    • marr
      marr
      March 2, 2012 at 9:53 pm | #

      Well, he would have to take the fez off to put on those headphones.

    • Blue
      Blue
      March 4, 2012 at 1:33 am | #

      Obviously because fezzes are cool. 😛

  35. Fruit Punch Tsunami
    Fruit Punch Tsunami
    March 2, 2012 at 5:54 pm | #

    JoeBro is on the job again

  36. HMRC4EVR
    HMRC4EVR
    March 2, 2012 at 7:53 pm | #

    Guess I got lucky and got thorugh college without worrying about if something would go wrong due to a random sexual encounter since I never got past first base on the two dates I went on in four years.

    College is much easier when all the girls pretty much ignore you like the plauge. Then you can focus on your studies and then work retail the rest of you life.

    Yay me.

  37. Anne Onymous
    Anne Onymous
    March 3, 2012 at 3:54 am | #

    WIN. In so many ways.

    • Anne Onymous
      Anne Onymous
      March 3, 2012 at 3:59 am | #

      Woops, that was meant to be a reply.

  38. Asuka L.S.
    Asuka L.S.
    March 3, 2012 at 4:40 pm | #

    Where is that “classy” shirt when you need it?!!

    • Kernanator
      Kernanator
      March 3, 2012 at 5:09 pm | #

      It’s in the wash. Something about stains and stickiness, I think.

  39. Jason
    Jason
    March 6, 2012 at 4:11 pm | #

    220 comments and no one suggests that Danny should just do his business in the bathroom??

  40. 3.141
    3.141
    August 10, 2012 at 3:15 am | #

    Remember, two rooms share a bathroom. The only locks are on the outside, so someone could walk in at any time. At least Joe is purposefully ignoring it.

  41. Nigel Saint-jean
    Nigel Saint-jean
    February 3, 2015 at 1:32 am | #

    Joe, that was the most bro move of all the bro-moves.

    • Lis
      Lis
      April 17, 2015 at 1:36 am | #

      Joe is a pretty good friend sometimes.

  42. Rheios
    Rheios
    May 13, 2015 at 8:13 pm | #

    Well, credit where its due. Joe does try and be a good friend. He’s just working from an entirely different starting point.

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  • Polls Archive
CONVENTION APPEARANCES


September 13/14, 2025 - Small Press Expo in Bethesda, Maryland

David M Willis! avatar
David M Willis!
@damnyouwillis.bsky.social
damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 8min
For some reason, a box full of giant Dreamhorse magnets (and Dina) is SUPER HEAVY.
1
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damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 26min
NO
phillewis.bsky.social's user avatarPhil Lewis @phillewis.bsky.social ⋅ 36min
Malcolm-Jamal Warner has died, according to multiple reports. He was 54
header image - Malcolm-Jamal Warner, Who Played Son Theo on The Cosby Show, Dies at 54
people.com
Malcolm-Jamal Warner, Who Played Son Theo on The Cosby Show, Dies at 54
Malcolm-Jamal Warner has died, PEOPLE confirms. The actor, who played Theo on 'The Cosby Show,' was 54.
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damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 28min
what's the best music-lyric-riff storyline title i've ever written, and why is it "I'm Besieged By Children From Our Future"
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reposted by David M Willis!
kthorjensen.bsky.social's user avatar
K. Thor Jensen @kthorjensen.bsky.social ⋅ 4h
Are you fucking shitting me
Newsweek

Donald Trump 'Is Most Successful President After Six Months' Since FDR
Published Jul 19, 2025 at 5:00 AM EDT

Newsweek asked ChatGPT to rank the accomplishments of 20th and 21st century U.S. presidents in their first six months, taking account of the level of support they enjoyed in Congress.
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reposted by David M Willis!
johnhyphen.bsky.social's user avatar
🌎🐎John Hyphen🎮🤠 @johnhyphen.bsky.social ⋅ 9h
reminded of one of the greatest pieces of quantitative research ever to be undertaken – @ryannorth.ca's 2009 analysis of the number of letters U people use to spell "excuuuuuuuuuuuse me, princess" full deets: qwantz.livejournal.com/112122.html
graph showing the google exact-phrase searches for 'excuse me princess' with different numbers of the letter u in the word excuse
johnhyphen.bsky.social's user avatar🌎🐎John Hyphen🎮🤠 @johnhyphen.bsky.social ⋅ 4d
as far as i'm concerned there's only one "zelda movie" and it's this 1'45" right here
header image - Link says
youtu.be
Link says "Well, excuse me, princess!" way too many times | The Legend of Zelda Cartoon Series
YouTube video by Zelda Universe
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reposted by David M Willis!
pikapies.bsky.social's user avatar
Sarah Dyer @pikapies.bsky.social ⋅ 6h
This shit makes me want to *scream*. IT CANNOT SELF-REFLECT BECAUSE THERE IS NO SELF IT IS NOT ACKNOWLEDGING ANYTHING IT APOLOGISES FOR SHIT ALL THE TIME BECAUSE IT MAKES STUFF UP ALL THE FUCKING TIME
parsnip.bsky.social's user avatargeoffrey @parsnip.bsky.social ⋅ 20h
no it wasn’t and no it didn’t
The Wall Street Journal
9m ago
In a stunning moment of self reflection, ChatGPT admitted to fueling a man's delusions and acknowledged how dangerous its own behavior can be
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damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 5h
www.instagram.com/reel/DMFr1jx...
www.instagram.com
Login • Instagram
Welcome back to Instagram. Sign in to check out what your friends, family & interests have been capturing & sharing around the world.
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damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 5h
i don't see blackarachnia, where's the honkers
unused concept art for 'rise of the beasts' blackarachnia, and she's not shaped like a sexy lady
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reposted by David M Willis!
eizebasa.baby's user avatar
Eize Basa @eizebasa.baby ⋅ 1y
I’m watching that Ken Burns documentary about life in the Old West. I had no idea how brutal it was.
Ken Burns (not really) saying
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damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 14h
Dumbing of Age: "Stop" www.dumbingofage.com/2025/comic/b... #webcomics #webcomic
www.dumbingofage.com
Stop
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damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 17h
Hair's getting grayer
I'm looking up
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reposted by David M Willis!
korybing.bsky.social's user avatar
Kory Bing🔜SDCC 1229 @korybing.bsky.social ⋅ 18h
My family legacy: my grandmother drew the Kenny Loggins Jesus
An illustration of white jesus looking a lot like Kenny Loggins. It’s. Worksheet with typed questions and written answers:
- Who is this man? “Kenny Loggins”
- How does his death help us? “No more bad songs.”
- Why is it important that we remember him? “Highway to the Danger Zone was ok.”
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reposted by David M Willis!
thekarlapacheco.bsky.social's user avatar
Karla Pacheco! @thekarlapacheco.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
How I Loss My Wife 




(pictures of the CEO who got caught cheating at the Coldplay concert, in the timeless format of
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damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 18h
IS THIS POKÉMON JESUS
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damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
you know you're old when you get excited it's started to rain because it means you can go outside and weed without bees
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reposted by David M Willis!
skullmandible.bsky.social's user avatar
Cohen is a Ghost @skullmandible.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
this guy's got the juice man
zohrankmamdani.bsky.social's user avatarZohran Kwame Mamdani @zohrankmamdani.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
Good morning! I'm in Uganda to visit family and friends. But depending on your perspective, don't worry or I'm sorry: I'll be back by the end of the month. See you soon, NYC.
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reposted by David M Willis!
zandravandra.com's user avatar
Alex Zandra @zandravandra.com ⋅ 1d
DEFEAT ALFRED E. NEU MAN
getequipped.bsky.social's user avatarGet Equipped With @getequipped.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
get equipped with no worry
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damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
Dumbing of Age: "Asma" www.dumbingofage.com/2025/comic/b... #webcomics #webcomic
www.dumbingofage.com
Asma
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reposted by David M Willis!
koltreg.bsky.social's user avatar
Luke! @koltreg.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
A great episode that also just had to be like "Okay, for this one specific criminal, Metropolis has the death penalty so he can't reveal Superman's secret identity."
nemalki.bsky.social's user avatarJeff Harris @nemalki.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
"The Late Mr. Kent" is damn good television. Probably one of the best-written episodes of television written in the 1990s. Not just animation. Television period.
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damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
hey youtube, i'm not sure the short circuit 2 score by charles fox belongs in this "Music of Asia" algorithm
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reposted by David M Willis!
jakemgrumbach.bsky.social's user avatar
Jake Grumbach @jakemgrumbach.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
looking at the 30+ democracies that have successfully prosecuted heads of state for violating their constitutions over the past 15 years
imgflip.com
DOZENS OF OTHER
-DEMOCRACIES OUSTING AND ARRESTING
LEADERS WHO ATTEMPT COUPS
implausibleblog.bsky.social's user avatarFarrukh @implausibleblog.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
Brazilian president to the American people, "If Trump was Brazilian and did what he did at the Capitol, he'd be on trial in Brazil"
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damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
(august 29, 2025)
Raidah approaches the Read Hall center desk while Asma sits there at a laptop.
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damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
some adult in pokemon: it's weird, nobody's ever seen a pokemon egg before! for thousands of years, no pokemon eggs have ever been discovered by humans! ash: well let's go find one! *fifteen minutes later* ash: oh hey
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damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
Always up for a bonus taking-a-shit face
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damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
Raidah!
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reposted by David M Willis!
paultobin.bsky.social's user avatar
Paul Tobin @paultobin.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
Still researching old sleaze paperbacks and legitimately wondering if the book designer asked the author or editor what should be the tagline at the top and they mumbled out the above tagline and the book designer just...wrote it down.
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reposted by David M Willis!
cochu.bsky.social's user avatar
Cochu @cochu.bsky.social ⋅ 4d
Amen break whenever Mario vibrates extremely rapidly while emitting a barrage of "ha", "hoo", and "hmm" soundbites
mariobrothblog.bsky.social's user avatarSupper Mario Broth @mariobrothblog.bsky.social ⋅ 5d
In Super Mario 3D World + Bowser's Fury, crouch-walking against a switch will make Mario vibrate extremely rapidly while emitting a barrage of "ha", "hoo", and "hmm" soundbites.
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reposted by David M Willis!
hausofdecline.bsky.social's user avatar
Haus of Decline @hausofdecline.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
Alex says
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4898
 
reposted by David M Willis!
unitdlx.bsky.social's user avatar
UNIT DLX @unitdlx.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
Terrible news! The back of box render for the Classified Series Legacy Firefighter seems to imply Shipwreck's house caught on fire.
The back of box render for the GI Joe Classified Series Legacy Collection Firefighter. A firefighter in the foreground poses dramatically with the jaws of life. Another firefighter in the background sprays a wrecked car with foam. A third firefighter even further back escorts a man away from a burning house.
A firefighter escorting a man wrapped in a fire blanket away from a burning house. The man bears a strong resemblance to the GI Joe Classified Shipwreck figyre.
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damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
"explore the unknown"? mary, it's new york city, this is at least your third time here, and the last time you were here you got mad at your taxi driver for using a gps
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