A witch accidentally marries a monster, and now she and her familiar has to navigate life around her monstrous husband and her even more terrifying in-laws.
Cyanide & Happiness
Explosm
Satire, dark humor and surreal humor.
All Known Alternatives
Karolina 'Kajotko' Jankiewicz
Akane has only one way to get back home: collect the 42 keys to parallel worlds. Eri and Ben are just trying to get through the summer before university. When a magical key turns up in an old spare set, all three are forced to change their plans and fast.
Paint the Town Red
Windy, Winter Jay Kiakas
Winona runs a werewolf shelter with partner in crime, Odile in the Gothic city of Merlot. One day they take in an injured vampire, and soon unravels many of the dark secrets of Merlot.
No End
Erli, Kromi
A queer romance about people attempting to build lives in a cold, post-apocalyptic world ravaged by hordes of undead.
Guilded Age
T Campbell, John Waltrip, Florence Machina
Welcome to the saga of the working-class adventurer! Enjoy the complete story with new annotations daily!
Dumbing of Age
David M Willis
Joyce has been homeschooled her entire life until now, when she's suddenly a freshman in college! Things don't go well.
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I’m mostly familiar with the media and video games, rather than the tabletop game (WAY too expensive), but it’s an interesting universe – deliberately over-the-top grimdark, where even the handful of factions that can be considered good guys are xenophobic, and tyrannical in various ways…but the other factions are worse.
Also, this strip’s title sounds like something a kid from a 1950s children’s book would say.
Little Danny Wilcox, Boy Adventurer:“Gosharootie, this secret pirate cave we found sure is keeners! What do you think, Scraps?” Scraps:“Ruff! Ruff!” Little Danny Wilcox, Boy Adventurer:“Swell!”
Look, Danny, I can understand not wanting to talk about a bad breakup with your parents. Really, I do. But this is one of those times that you should really have mentioned it earlier.
I never kept my parents appraised of my relationship status in college. My mom was schizo when it came to that sort of thing.
“You’re with a new girl? Well I hope you’re taking it slow, or at least using protection! That’s what some girls do, they go to college just to snag a young man with prospects and get pregnant so they can bleed you dry…now when can I have a grandchild?!“
Disturbingly enough it sounds like mine. She told me to cover my pocket, (wallet) and fly (penis), because some girls would go after one, the other, or both.
She’s not the best, but I love her anyway.
That sounds like confusing advice. “Don’t have sex except for as soon as possible but only with the right woman when you’re ready the second you meet her.”
He grew it towards the end of Roomies, but was made a secondary character once Roomies ended. That said, DoA’s Danny is WAY more of a wimp than Walkyverse Danny, so I’m guessing that it’s going to take a while for him to grow a backbone.
A father actively encouraging his son to be with someone because he thinks the OTHER person is going somewhere. Even allowing room for joking…
BAD RANDALL. BAD FATHERING. YOU APOLOGIZE TO YOUR SON RIGHT NOW!
Hmmm. You have a point… how do I put mine. Uh… not to sound cheesy but I’d prefer a “I’m happy you’re happy.” Type thing. I mean obviously speak up with yours, but…
Wait, mine means not talking about someone you despise as their SO. Hmmm. How do I put this……..
Damn it. This is the internet, only well thought out arguments should be here.
Actually, I get where you’re coming from. : ) But because we all post things that sound great at midnight and then a little off-kilter in the morning, it’s fun to play with the language later!
So I reeeeally feel like every time Danny appears in the comic, there should be people painted robin’s egg blue in the background to symbolize his bland, unlikeable resemblance to Tommie from Apartment 3-G.
My dad once told me, “You need to go to a small liberal arts school and meet a rich east coast girl, because the only way [men in our family] are successful in this world is by marrying well.”
In my father’s family, they had a rule (I’m not sure if it’s still the rule since I’m not connected to them now) that you had to marry someone richer than you, regardless of your gender, because that brought money into the family.
Danny’s nowhere near the worst. He’s an idiot, his brain to mouth filter should have been changed years ago, but it’s not as if he actively sets out to hurt people, he’s not a misogynist (just ridiculously naive regarding how people work in general)
People wanna have a go at Danny, but frankly, at least he’s trying.
Point, but I guess in my head, Ryan is so terrible as to be on a scale all his own (y’know, a ‘total monster’ kind of scale instead of a ‘not a good person’ scale).
I tend to think of Danny like Mrelegos, and usually the ‘bad things’ he does are more out of just not realizing. But, at this point, he’s actively not correcting his parents and creating a bad situation.
Just gonna say: not uncommon for parents of two twitterpated individuals to become friends, or be friends before said individuals became twitterpated, and to remain friends after twitterpation ends.
Also, some people get to stay friends of their exes’ parents. Because their parents are cool like that.
…clearly she’s not close to them on account of not having contacted them after the break-up.
The humor of this whole fiasco is made better by the fact that this story was put in motion 3 years ago, but for them it was more like three weeks. So the exasperation is about 2% of what it would be, by our time.
Um… Is it just me or is what Danny’s father said the WORST possible thing he could have said, next to “I don’t think you’ll amount to anything, oh and I killed your kitten.”
Wait, so why is everyone criticizing Danny, then? I mean, if he just hasn’t told his parents yet…so?
Is that actually a thing people do, keep their parents up to date on everyone they’re dating? I guess I don’t understand why people are saying this makes Danny “the worst”.
Because the readers of this comic will, given any chance whatsoever, will leap all over absolutely anything the Danny does and brand him scum, the worst, a douche, a wimp, whatever.
It’s something a lot of fandoms do whenever they’re confronted with a character who is by and large quite nice and trying his best to be a good guy, but still has flaws. It’s quite amusing once you spot the tendency, cross-fandoms.
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Now he’s joyce and dorothy’s danny.
Can’t be. Dorothy’s actually likable!
Dorothy is her own boyfriend.
Dorothy is caramel?
“LATCH ONTO THAT WOMAN LIKE THE INCEL YOU ARE”
…
“okay dad”
You may have to jiggle the arms to make them latch back on, but excessive force will just break it and cuase scratching
isn’t danny the opposite of an incel?
… outcel?
Well played, Danny. Well, played.
Not well played at all, actually.
There isn’t any way this will end well for him.
It won’t end well. JUST AS PLANNED.
Danny’s smart moves are incomprehensible to the rest of us.
Danny’s in a social Sadomasochist relationship with himself?
And he wouldn’t have it any other way.
…that explains so much.
So Danny is Tzeench, I take it?
That sounds a lot more like Slaanesh than Tzeench.
He does have Tzeench’s tendency to work against his own interests, just ‘cuz, but masturbatory sadomasochism is definitely more Slaanesh’s realm.
I’ve never played 04k. I keep hearing references to it though. Does this mean it is good?
It’s great, if you like the kind of thing it is.
I’m mostly familiar with the media and video games, rather than the tabletop game (WAY too expensive), but it’s an interesting universe – deliberately over-the-top grimdark, where even the handful of factions that can be considered good guys are xenophobic, and tyrannical in various ways…but the other factions are worse.
The Ciaphas Cain book series is pretty fun. It’s basically a comedy set in 40K, so if you’re worried about the grimness, you can go with that instead.
And, c’mon, he’s dating a superhero now! Well… more “costumed vigilante” than superhero, but still! It’s not like he’s covering up for being single!
He’s like Vicky Vale without the alliteration!
Unless you count his many nicknames… “Douchebag Danny”, “Danny Dickface”, “Danny Dumbass”, “Whiny Wilcox”, etc.
“Amazi-Girl’s Girlfriend Danny Dickface” sounds like a comic I would probably buy,
I think of Danny as more a Gwen Stacy than anything.
Just has that kinda face that says “Please throw me off a bridge” is what I’m saying.
And then Amazi-Girl dated someone completely different, and Danny missed out on her big budget movie. On account of being dead.
Until the reboot, that is.
You mean “chubby college student in spandex”. Youd get the same result by looking for dates in a college town coffee shop.
That’s not chubby. ‘Cept for the Amazi-Rack, that’s all muscle.
I parsed this poorly at first and was briefly under the impression that you thought her tits were basically boob-fists.
Yeah, poor pronoun-antecedent placement. My bad.
You gotta admit that would be awesome, though.
You use the word “dating” pretty loosely. They hung out a few times, mainly playing video games. There’s infatuation, but that’s about it.
You forgot the time when they made out by the side of the street.
http://www.dumbingofage.com/2013/comic/book-3/02-guess-whos-coming-to-galassos/compartmentalize/
Amazi-girl is totes a superhero. She’s my favorite super ever~
“What’s this in your room, comic books? Oh son, you’re not still into superheroes, are you?”
“Not really, dad, but it’s not for lack of trying! It’s just the tights kinda get in the way, y’know?”
HEYOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Look, this stuff is so immatur–
Oh. OOOOOH. I’ll put this back then.
If you are dating another superhero again I’m gonna bongo slap you, son.
In this family, we only date good, old-fashioned, wholesome clowns!
Well, that explains why Danny is Danny. Great role model there.
Danny’s dad reminds me of Barney Rubble.
I tried reading it in Barney Rubble’s voice, but I couldn’t. I’m kinda disappointed by that.
Great, now I’ve mentally given him the voice. Now it doesn’t matter what he says, it will always sound stupid.
There are 2 kinds of people in this world. Those who can read that in Barney’s voice and those that can’t.
I find it possible to read it in Barney’s voice, but the vernacular after the first sentence doesn’t quite fit what Barney would use.
It helps if you imagine the laugh after he’s done talking.
Well, sure, but isn’t that basically true of everything you could say about divisions of people?
There are two kinds of people in this world. Those who are on fire, and those who are not.
Those who wear red belts instead of underwear, and those who do not.
Those who are one of two kinds of people, and those who aren’t.
Okay, almost everything. You win this round, old man.
I will laugh until I die once they get to a conversation topic that I strongly believe will be brought up.
Danny is clearly also concealing his free-hanging penis?
That explains Dorothy’s reaction.
I did that this morning. With pants!
Also, this strip’s title sounds like something a kid from a 1950s children’s book would say.
Little Danny Wilcox, Boy Adventurer:“Gosharootie, this secret pirate cave we found sure is keeners! What do you think, Scraps?”
Scraps:“Ruff! Ruff!”
Little Danny Wilcox, Boy Adventurer:“Swell!”
Gosharootie is Mr. Warner’s superhero catchphrase.
… That explains so much.
Look, Danny, I can understand not wanting to talk about a bad breakup with your parents. Really, I do. But this is one of those times that you should really have mentioned it earlier.
(I’m back. Anybody miss me?)
Yes! But my aim is improving.
You were gone?
Yeah, I was up in Sacramento for the state fair. Got to see Weird Al live. Good times.
Who are you?
I’m Batman.
I. Am. Ironman.
The two must never fight. No one can know the winner. It would be too much for the world to know.
I AM SPARTICUS!
I’m Brian, and so’s my wife!
Spartacus? THIS. IS. MADNESS!
Okay, I’m done. That comment was stupid even for me.
We Are Pinky & The Brain. We’re Pinky And the BRAIN Brain brain brain brain brain brain BRAIN. Narf!
This is probably one of the worst gravatars to use with my prior comment.
It raises so many questions!
Not really – if the guy can convincingly dress up as killer croc, then he could be anybody.
Hi, I’m Daisy!
Your worst nightmare.
(Yes, but I think I have time to reload)
I never kept my parents appraised of my relationship status in college. My mom was schizo when it came to that sort of thing.
“You’re with a new girl? Well I hope you’re taking it slow, or at least using protection! That’s what some girls do, they go to college just to snag a young man with prospects and get pregnant so they can bleed you dry…now when can I have a grandchild?!“
Disturbingly enough it sounds like mine. She told me to cover my pocket, (wallet) and fly (penis), because some girls would go after one, the other, or both.
She’s not the best, but I love her anyway.
That sounds like confusing advice. “Don’t have sex except for as soon as possible but only with the right woman when you’re ready the second you meet her.”
“…And for goodness sake, always use protection, but gimme grandbabies now!”
Look, these ones come pre ruptured!
I have a feeling that we’re going to have to wait for a LONG while before Danny grows a spine like he did in the Walkyverse.
The Wilcox is known for being an invertebrate during early stages of it’s life.
On the upside, by his perception of time it’ll probably happen much, much faster!
Did Danny ever actually grow a spine? I stopped reading It’s Walky! around where Sal breaks out of jail.
He grew it towards the end of Roomies, but was made a secondary character once Roomies ended. That said, DoA’s Danny is WAY more of a wimp than Walkyverse Danny, so I’m guessing that it’s going to take a while for him to grow a backbone.
Mooch off your girlfriend, Danny. That’s how I met your mom. Try trapping her with a kid. Worked for me!
Dammit Danny, you are dating a super hero, that’s an upgrade
“There’s no possible way you could’ve fucked this up already Danny. You’d have to be a complete piece of shit to let a woman like that go.”
Wow, it sounds like Danny has HORRIBLE parents.
Dorothy is describing Danny in panel 4, then, apparently.
A father actively encouraging his son to be with someone because he thinks the OTHER person is going somewhere. Even allowing room for joking…
BAD RANDALL. BAD FATHERING. YOU APOLOGIZE TO YOUR SON RIGHT NOW!
But . . . Wouldn’t the opposite be far worse?
“She’s an alcoholic with anger management issues, no education, and a criminal record. Stick with this one, son.”
Hmmm. You have a point… how do I put mine. Uh… not to sound cheesy but I’d prefer a “I’m happy you’re happy.” Type thing. I mean obviously speak up with yours, but…
Wait, mine means not talking about someone you despise as their SO. Hmmm. How do I put this……..
Damn it. This is the internet, only well thought out arguments should be here.
Actually, I get where you’re coming from. : ) But because we all post things that sound great at midnight and then a little off-kilter in the morning, it’s fun to play with the language later!
Hey! Billie has an education!
Ha!
Danny: Putting the cock-up in Wilcox.
He’s Wilcox of the Walks.
Impressing all the ladies with his self-cock-blocks?
So I reeeeally feel like every time Danny appears in the comic, there should be people painted robin’s egg blue in the background to symbolize his bland, unlikeable resemblance to Tommie from Apartment 3-G.
I guess that would make Joe his Margo.
…who’d the LuAnn in that situation?
You know, I don’t think we have anyone vapid enough for that one. So I’m just gonna say Danny in a blonde wig.
Willis, the alt text brings up a question; what comedians are you into?
I have no idea why the alt text brings up that question, so I’m guessing different ones than you.
Ooooh, tell us, tell us!
I’m not sure I’m big enough into any specific comedians to be “into” them. I guess I follow Patton Oswalt on Twitter.
I’m guessing piemanpie24 took the alt text as a reference to a Brian Regan routine – just as I did.
A transcript of the routine: http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Brian_Regan#From_Brian_Regan_Live:_Stupid_in_School
Yeah, that joke is older than that.
My dad once told me, “You need to go to a small liberal arts school and meet a rich east coast girl, because the only way [men in our family] are successful in this world is by marrying well.”
OUR GENES MUST PASS ON, DANNY. YOU ARE OUR ONLY HOPE, DANNY. YOU MUST GO TO COLLEGE IN THE DAGOB– wait, don’t do that. Ewwwww….
And I thought they smelled bad on the outside!
Nice of your dad to clarify from the start that you only hold value as a gene transfer system
It’s not so much about having kids as it is about being financially/socially successful.
In my father’s family, they had a rule (I’m not sure if it’s still the rule since I’m not connected to them now) that you had to marry someone richer than you, regardless of your gender, because that brought money into the family.
I physically laughed. I truly let out physical laughter.
Well played. Well well played.
Ok, now Danny’s the worst.
When (in this universe) was Danny /not/ the worst?
I’ve always been more of a ‘Yeah, Danny’s bad, but he could do worse things…” or “He’s just making the best of a bad situation, I guess…”
But this was just one thing too far… sigh…
Crap, this means I’ve been a Danny apologist up until now, doesn’t it?
Until Danny tries to drug and rape an innocent girl, he can rest assured that he isn’t the worst in this universe.
That’s kind of damning with faint praise, though.
(I think I’d rank Mary as worse than Danny, too, though we thankfully see less of her. Er. I mean, “see her less often”.)
Danny’s nowhere near the worst. He’s an idiot, his brain to mouth filter should have been changed years ago, but it’s not as if he actively sets out to hurt people, he’s not a misogynist (just ridiculously naive regarding how people work in general)
People wanna have a go at Danny, but frankly, at least he’s trying.
I sure find Danny trying.
Point, but I guess in my head, Ryan is so terrible as to be on a scale all his own (y’know, a ‘total monster’ kind of scale instead of a ‘not a good person’ scale).
I tend to think of Danny like Mrelegos, and usually the ‘bad things’ he does are more out of just not realizing. But, at this point, he’s actively not correcting his parents and creating a bad situation.
It kind of looks like Danny’s dad has a comb-over.
Soon, there shall be SUFFERING
Danny is absolutely spineless.
The proper term is “invertebrate”. Danny should know, his picture is in the dictionary.
Invertebrates at least have a thick outer shell. Danny’s got the worst of both worlds.
Actually, now that I think about it, Danny would have to be pretty thick to stick around Dorothy as long as he has.
Not necessarily- worms don’t have outer shells. maybe Danny is some kind of worm.
Just gonna say: not uncommon for parents of two twitterpated individuals to become friends, or be friends before said individuals became twitterpated, and to remain friends after twitterpation ends.
Also, some people get to stay friends of their exes’ parents. Because their parents are cool like that.
…clearly she’s not close to them on account of not having contacted them after the break-up.
*clicks comic* *clicks again*
Oh dear lord, I caught up…
nooooooooo~~~
The humor of this whole fiasco is made better by the fact that this story was put in motion 3 years ago, but for them it was more like three weeks. So the exasperation is about 2% of what it would be, by our time.
Man this kid is pathetic.
Those Wilcoxen are going to be trouble.
Anybody else want Ambe — I mean Amazi-Girl — to appear out of nowhere and slap him?
Maybe I empathize with Danny too much but I can understand his hesitation. It’s not always easy to talk to family about personal matters.
Seriously though, how does one break the news to one’s parents that one is dating a superhero?
“Danny must have behaved like a human being instead of a passive agressive doucheba … oh crap.”
(Actually, I can easily imagine myself in Danny’s position. And this horrifies me, and leads me to resolve to lead a better life.)
No, he was just being passive, because he was afraid to tell his parents. No aggression whatsoever/
Well now, I see where Danny gets his Danny-ness from.
Just noticed that Danny’s Dad’s hair looks suspiciously like Mike’s.
Oh, Danny, you are a hot mess. Don’t ever change.
And then they meet Amber.
“Dorothy! You’ve got new glasses! And you’ve dyed your hair! And… gained some weight! And… you’ve had plastic surgery?”
Um… Is it just me or is what Danny’s father said the WORST possible thing he could have said, next to “I don’t think you’ll amount to anything, oh and I killed your kitten.”
Explains a lot about Danny, doesn’t it?
I feel like there’s some inside joke here I’m not getting. What’s the point of the last two panels?
There is no inside joke. Read the third panel carefully. That should tell you everything you need to know.
Wait, so why is everyone criticizing Danny, then? I mean, if he just hasn’t told his parents yet…so?
Is that actually a thing people do, keep their parents up to date on everyone they’re dating? I guess I don’t understand why people are saying this makes Danny “the worst”.
It helps if you read the entire comic from the beginning. The context helps things make more sense.
Because the readers of this comic will, given any chance whatsoever, will leap all over absolutely anything the Danny does and brand him scum, the worst, a douche, a wimp, whatever.
It’s something a lot of fandoms do whenever they’re confronted with a character who is by and large quite nice and trying his best to be a good guy, but still has flaws. It’s quite amusing once you spot the tendency, cross-fandoms.
well… he could always tell them Dorothy had a hair dye.