Kevin Buist @kevinbuist.com ⋅ 7h
Ferric Fang @fangferric.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
Paul Lê @paulle.bsky.social ⋅ 21h
Rolling Stone @rollingstone.com ⋅ 1d
Blue sky nice guy @rajandelman.bsky.social ⋅ 11d
Maggie Westrum @maggiewestrum.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
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How can Sal say no to a face like that?
Pretty easily.
A fist is worth a thousand words.
Then how much is a fist full of femur?
A fist full of knuckles!
About as much as a fist full of dollars.
The joke was simultaneously Good, Bad, and Ugly.
I should be able to come up with a better one For A Few Dollars More.
And the triangle is complete.
Have a cookie.
Shouldn’t that be ‘A fist full of nickels’? I though that was primary currency around here.
Only if mothers are being fucked.
For a nickel.
that thirst for necks!
“I’ve got a handful of vertebrae and a headful of mad!”
Yeah, Willis! You said no one had superpowers in this universe!
Sal is too Sal to follow universal rules.
The gum-to-tooth ratio would make it a bit easier.
I know I can’t say no to 274 teeth. And you know she brushes three times a day and after every meal. I’m surprised Sal’s not squinting against the glare.
By remembering that the person on the other side of the face is fairly self-centered and self-serving.
Also, if Joyce still thinks Dorothy is going to hell (she doesn’t make jokes like that and it was the reason she thought Dorothy could/should lie), she sure thinks Sal is. That should make it easy to turn Joyce down.
Okay, you’re no fun.
I like all the rest of the characters except Danny and Joyce – and what I said was based on the way they have been characterized. Maybe I’ve had my fill of people trying to get away with their obvious faults by hiding behind cuteness.
Given the reasonable way characters have been acting, you’d think the rest would catch on.
OTOH I’d love a comic of Mike Batman Gambiting everybody into dealing with their issues.
Sal’s face is perfect.
Joyce’s face is self-plagiarism
Nah, I disagree. The two are very clearly different smiles; the common trait is that they’re overly large. Another is the way they’re drawn, but that’s more his art style than him doing a call-back to that.
By saying that, I assume you are either not very observant or a jerk.
They probably have no soul.
Pfft Bwahahahaha!!!!
It’s like watching someone poking a bear with a stick…
Probably safer though, seeing as Sal hasn’t mauled her yet.
Poking a bear with a REALLY LONG stick.
A really long and pointy stick.
At the end of the stick, a note that reads “I HATE BEARS”.
A note printed on a photo of someone flipping the bears off.
And the person flipping the bears off is Hitler.
And the bear is both miraculously literate and has studied human culture.
Top of the class in Human Studies.
And said bear has anger issues.
And follows bear Judaism.
And his name is Eric.
So.. We pegged some Cracked readers..
WHICH ONE OF YOU IS ACTUALLY ERIC?! HUH?! OR IS ONE OF YOU SCARY MIKE?!
It’s adorable how she acts!
Ohgod there is nothing in that girl’s head except teeth and eyeballs.
All she needs is an afro and a scarf…
Why?
Fourth Doctor reference?
I guess so.
Congrats on getting it! Would you like a jelly baby?
I’d prefer a banana or a jammy dodger, personally.
I will have a celery stalk, please.
and the brainy specs!
That sounds like a thing I once ran away from while RPing call of Cthulhu. It was not as cute as Joyce.
Hey, Shoggoths are full of love, they just get a little bit nervous and start babbling incoherently while trying to give hugs.
All well and good, but since they shred sanity like paper confetti.
Got cut off….since they shred sanity like confetti, I’m still running away!
I’ve always imagined the “Tekeli-li! Tekeli-li!” sound the shoggoth’s make from At the Mountains of Madness to have this almost beautiful singsong quality to it.
Reportedly, when I have run Call of Cthulhu/Delta Green, it has not made them less creepy.
Sarah wouldn’t know what cool was if she had her head stuck in a bucket of ice.
That’s because Sarah’s too hot-headed and she can only know Lukewarm.
Should we cool her off with a cool tropical song?
No, no, no, we need to warm her cold heart with a warm tropical song obviously!
No, no, no. We need to melt her icy heart with a cool island song!
And Punch! Not to forget Punch!
Joyce you’re not cool….. you’re AWESOME.
Hey ladies, if you wanna go hog-wild…
Don’t hog all the wild for yourself!!!
Panel 2: Joyce shows cleavage, is even more of a rebel.
And hear I thought Joyce didn’t have cleavage. Like she willed away her ability to produce it.
No, some of Billie’s fell into Joyce’s shirt. Somehow.
…Yes, that makes sense, why do you ask?
We covered this subject yesterday.
I missed it yesterday
Honestly we’re pretty much always talking about cleavage around here; the only question is whether it’s subtext or if it’s overt.
Keep that in mind the next time a religious debate breaks out.
Sal likes riding her ‘hog’. -canned laughter-
I don’t get it.
I’ll tell you when you’re older, Wack’d.
Hopefully someone will do the same for me.
Joyce will never run out of expressions. Never.
Joyce, congratulations on having successfully completed the Standing Up to Your Parents and Choosing Friendship over Dogma modules. Your next assignment is the Understanding Irony module.
See, you’ve made it to step 4.
This is a 200 step initiation.
Those few centimeters of cleavage line prove that Joyce is heading to the dark side, the path that rocks.
Cleavage is the way of evil. Pure delicious evil.
Burns going down, but it’s very tasty.
If you’re getting cleavage-burns when going down, you might want to slow down a little.
Final destination: Marshmallow Hell!!!
Joyce is so upset that she said it wrong. Man, willis, teach me your adorable ways!
Actual evidence that I am Joyce.
I’m not feelin’ this story arc.
You mean the story arc that literally has only three strips in it so far? I’m pretty sure the other story arcs didn’t show their best stuff straight out of the gate. Let’s give this a little more time.
Sorry, four strips. Miscounted. Point still remains.
I can’t think of the word “Hog” without thinking of “Let Me Be Your Hog” by “Weird Al.”
My mind went to the same place.
Hey Joyce, I’ll take you for rides on MY “motorcycle”
.
.
.
No. Really. I have one too. Lol.
Joyce, we all know that you just want to motorboat Sal’s bike not ride it.
Bikes don’t have boobs, PM.
She will find the most round parts of the leather seat and rub her face between it vigorousely. Sal will be mad cuz she’ll get tears and snot on it.
Joyce will find a way.
Tell that to Arcee.
Joyce is a cute, if misguided, gal.
She’s little miss guided.
Dammit. I ship it. I don’t want to ship it, because I have enough ships already. But I do. Freaking hell!
But… Why.
I dunno. I guess I find opposites sexy. Also, considering Sal’s normal range of emotions is either “cold and aloof” or “raging ball of emotions” the fact that Joyce inspires bemused sarcasm is actually a nice change of pace.
Also, lest you think I’m being too sophisticated over here, Sal and Joyce were in a bunk moments ago and Sal was half-naked. Yeah, the strangling to death thing isn’t what I’d enjoy, but if they’re into autoeroticasphi-whatever who am I to judge?
It’s just so far out of the realm of compatibility that it’s a pairing that never crossed my mind. Mocking can lead to something else, but not if your victim doesn’t realize she’s being insulted. There’s also a significant difference in life experience and maturity, as in Sal is much more streetwise and independent, whereas Joyce is naive about how the world works, how relationships work and in some cases, like this, social behaviour and cues.
Also I think of Joyce as asexual in my head, which probably adds to that. I mean I know she’s into Ethan, but still.
Joyce isn’t asexual; far from it. She’d be coping a lot better if she were. One of her big problems is that down inside she’s seething with lusts and desires, and until now she’s been so sheltered that she hasn’t really had to deal with that before, and doesn’t know how.
But now that she’s in college, she’s spending a lot of time around all these tall, dark, nice-smelling Jewish boys and caramel twins with luscious rivers of chocolate hair and Billie’s cleavage and Dorothy’s legos and floormates who have no problem with wandering the halls in their underwear or towels and are doing sexual things, sometimes even with each other, and it’s stirring up all these feelings that she hasn’t got much experience with and that she has no guidance for how to deal with except repress and deny, because having those thoughts about anyone except the husband you have married in the eyes of God is sinful and shameful. (And having them about a woman is definitely sinful, regardless.) And that’s causing her all sorts of emotional stress.
I’ve seen it happen more than once that girls wound up as tight as Joyce, after they got out from under the parental thumb and gave in to temptation once or twice, and realized that God wasn’t striking them down for it, came totally unwound and started drinking, smoking, and having sex with any and everybody. I think Joyce is too centered to go that route, but I kind of suspect that’s what’s happening with Becky.
Asexual wasn’t the right word. I meant more like I can’t think of her as a sexual being, in the same way I can’t think of someone too immature for me (say, a 15-year-old) as a sexual being. They may have sexual desires, yes, but in Joyce’s case she’s not quite mature enough to deal with it yet because of her repressed upbringing. I also don’t usually “ship” younger characters (like Annie & Kat from Gunnerkrigg Court). I might think it’d be cute if they wound up together, especially now that they’re older, but I don’t actively want them in a relationship. It just seems weird to ship characters who aren’t really mature enough for adult relationships, though Joyce is taking baby steps now, misguidedly with Ethan.
Heh. Having read itswalky, I have no trouble whatsoever understanding Joyce as a mature character, sexuality and all.
…I’ll get there eventually…
She’s not asexual, she’s innocent. That doesn’t mean that she’s not itching to get rid of that innocence, though, and held in check only by her upbringing and the fact that the first couple guys she auditioned to help her out with that wanted to move things along way faster than she was comfortable with, and her current candidate is gay.
And, yeah, my take on Joyce is informed by that other Joyce, who in current Walkyverse continuity is in her mid-thirties and married with children. And free to admit how much she likes hanky-panky (a lot!) now that it’s not pre-marital anymore.
Joyce has been demonstrated to have sexual desire, mainly for Ethan, but she has demonstrated (confusingly, to her), attraction to Billie, Sal, and probably Dorothy. She also does want to get married and have a family.
Asexual doesn’t really fit her. Chaste, though, yeah.
Whoops, I think that falls under “too sophisticated.”
You aren’t alone. I ship it a lot harder than Dorothy/Joyce, though to be fair Dorothy/Joyce crashed into my Rocks of Canon Bias.
Plus bad girl + proper girl = sexy?
It simplifies to
Bad Girl = Sexy
Apparently, Bad Boy = Sexy, also.
To simplify further:
Bad = Sexy
Man, this explains some things…
Also, there’s the fact that we already know that Sal finds one panfully stuffy, sweater vest wearing, awkward nerd to be highly bangable. Its a simple extrapolation from there.
Joyce/Sal’s bike OTP.
You’re not alone.
>>>—SARCASM—>
JOYCE’S HEAD
. . . hits the wall of Sal’s stare. And breaks.
I don’t get it.
P.S.: I do get it.
“…your bike?”
“…your ride?”
“…your internal combustion, two-wheeled vehicle?”
Your baby?
“Your way of life?”
“Your escape?”
“Your Serenity?”
“Your crotch-rocket?”
“…your Pilder?”
Your albatross?
“Your Mom?”
I don’t think I’d pay a nickel for Linda.
BOOM! I love it.
“…your mount?”
“…your metal friend whose fun to be with?”
“…your silver stallion?”
I really don’t want to know what a Sirius Cybernetics Corporation motorcycle would look like.
The satisfied sighing it makes every time you mount one is probably a tad disturbing.
…Unless you’re into that.
You made me giggle! You win +1 Internet!
“your iron steed?”
If Joyce ever got to actually ride Sal’s motorcycle, I doubt she would let it go past 2 mph without crying.
-tears of joy.
Tears of Joyce.
Okay, I’m done.
Crying? I’m not sure it’s her eyes she’d be leaking from.
It would probably be the most genital stimulation she’s ever experienced in her life. An epiphany! Then, Roz will help her shop for a vibrator.
Joyce will be conflicted about whether it keeps her pure or not. Eventually she will decide it’s better than banging boys, and suddenly Sal and Billie will no longer have to worry about Joyce coming in to wake them up at an ungodly hour every Saturday. Although the buzzing will really start to get to Sarah…
I dunno, Willis did a pinup series a while back that had Joyce having a lot of fun while waiting for her laundry to dry… Heh.
What? Where?
His DeviantArt. I think you can buy them too.
check rule 34.com – http://rule34-data-000.paheal.net/_images/8a581245c47dbdac867db7afa7ef980c/875123%20-%20David_Willis%20Dumbing_of_Age%20Joyce_Brown%20Sarah_Clinton%20webcomic.png
* Reads alt text *
“SALLY! LET ME ON DA CHOPPA!”
RUN! GET TO DA CHOPPA!
I’LL BE BACK!
Remember when I said I’d kill you last?
Zed’s dead, baby.
Wait, what?
YOU FOOLS! THERE ARE WEAPONS ON THE CHOPPER!
That third panel reminds me of Fluffmodeus from Something Positive.
HELLO NEW FRIEND!
Aww she’s so cute!
I think Sal prefer to call it the Riderman Machine.
In order to get a ride on the motorcycle, you must act like you don’t want a ride on the motorcycle.
Man, whatever. Motorcycles aren’t even the coolest thing ever. I totally don’t daydream day and night about riding one so I don’t even know why you’d think that >:T.
(Motorcycle Tsundere(ugh. Using that word makes me feel icky))
Motorcycle Tsundere is my punk rock band.
Is it a zen thing?
Thought it was a Honda?
Sal…Sal, c’mon. How can you resist those big baby blues?
With her tiny black olives.
Yotomoe, come on now. Sal’s chest isn’t that small.
I’m gonna be honest. I find Joyce REALLY annoying right now. Like I want to sit her down and tell her everything she’s done wrong from start to finish.
It may take a while…and she’s only been talking for 3 comics.
She’s misguided but she means well.
She doesn’t really mean “well.” She just wants to win Sal’s… Favour and get a ride. If anything she’s just being self-centred.
That’s what makes Sal’s
all the more amazing. I’m kind of surprised she is humoring her by getting up and getting dressed.
Yotomoe, Joyce is my new girlfriend, so you had best leave her alone. Go pick on Walky or Danny again for a while.
And I *WILL* give her a ride on my bike – a 1955 Schwinn Town-and-Country tandem.
Your girlfriend is annoying.
I don’t know if my reply should be “Lord, forgive him, he knows not of what he speaks”, or to make a reference to Aesop and the fable of the Fox and the Grapes.
I like her, I wish I could be 18 again and meet someone like her in real life, and that’s all that counts.
You seriously can’t think of anything but ‘sour grapes’ as a reason to find her annoying? When she’s waking others up so that they could ask for a silly favor? Really?
I *like* Joyce and I think she’s being annoying to those around her. IT’s hilarious to watch, so I don’t dislike Joyce for it, but seriously…
To be fair, it IS noon already.
How the hell does the fox and the grapes translate here? They only think she’s annoying because she’s not their girlfriend and… is… yours?
I’m…. really not sure a reference to the fable of the fox and the grapes is really appropriate, here. In fact, I’m completely unable to see the connection at all.
C’mon Sal, let Joyce become a Kamen Rider!
You sure you want Joyce to become a cyborg?
Uh, yes!
And continuing my theory that Sal is Riderman, does that mean Joyce is Kamen Rider V3?
I dunno, I think Fourze would be a pretty good fit.
All hail the Cyber-Joyce!
Don’t worry, she’s got her Monkey-Master helmet now. It’s all good.
You know, after the day Joyce has had, I think she deserves a nice motorcycle ride. Even as she pushes Sal to the edge of sanity.
Sal deserves some rest though!
Yeah. Joyce’s day had more open conflict in it, but she came out of it with a clear victory and her family’s love and acceptance. Sal, not so much. Joyce should give her a break and let her sleep.
We still haven’t learned who she was talking to before.
Sal’s roomate Billie?
“It’s a chopper, baby.”
Sal is at her most awesome at this moment. I would have smothered Joyce with a pillow by now.
*With Sarah’s bat. Fixed!
I’m totally shipping Joyce’s panel three face and Sarah’s bat.
She thought that washing machine was fun…
Did Willis draw that or was that fan art?
He drew that and the other pin-ups.
I can’t decide whether or not Panel 3 is adorable.
Here let me help you :
Panel 3 is THE BEST THING IN THE WORLD OMFG <3 !!!
you're welcome.
Thanks…I think.
I think panel three is scary. In an adult. In a 4 year old it’s adorable.
Do I spy a cleavage line in panel 2?!? Joyce, I don’t even know you any more!
Also, she has popped her collar, a sure sign of being super-cool.
You know Joyce really means something when the basic shape of her mouth changes from triangle-shaped to bean-shaped.
It’s just part of her rebellious phase.
It’s too bad I know Joyce would never have been allowed to watch Teen Titans as a kid. Because she is seriously channeling Starfire right now.
LOL Totally Andy!
Joyce, Joyce, dear earnest, clueless Joyce…no, you should not have referred to a sport bike as a “hog”.Luckily Sal is much too cool to care, or she might have been insulted. Harley riders and sport bike riders often don’t think well of each other.
Wanna be cool? Get your own bike. Ask Sal to teach you to ride, not give you rides…let her mentor you, and you might find her warming to you.
That I’d like to see, those two hitting the road together. Joyce should ride something dorky, like, I dunno, a Honda Rebel. Yeah, that’d be perfect, now that she’s such a rebel.
Seriously, I delayed getting my first bike for years because as a fundie I was taught that it was a sin to disobey my parents. Then, in college, as my beliefs were changing, I got a ’70’s Honda that was sooooo cool, but still tried to hide it from her because I feared she’d disapprove. And worry; she’d seen some horrible accidents as a nurse.
No, Joyce’s rebellion would run more along the lines of a second-hand Yamahopper or Honda Express.
*”her” = mother. I failed to establish the antecedent, sorry.
She didn’t believe Sarah because she is always saying Joyce is wrong
I find it cool and neat how Joyce longs for freedom in every way she can find. I hope Sal gives her a ride, it’ll probably be good for her. Maybe she’ll get a hog of her own which her parents will hate. And if she doesn’t end up an organ donor she’ll ride out of her dark oppressive childhood and into the sun.
Crash into the sun!
Now I’m DEAD! (Like a boss!)
Sorry, I just had to do that. X)
In that last panel Joyce came off sounding like Starfire in my head.
Joyce should just say “can you take me for rides.” Her meaning would be clear and there would be no need to come up with the right words for what she wanted to ride.
I think Sal has reached her “this is no longer adorable”-threshold with Joyce. Tomorrow we’ll see Joyce fly out of the dorm room, Carlton-style.
That wasn’t Carlton, that was Jazz (Will’s friend, not the Transformer).
Well, I think it was Carlton one time, but as a reference to Jazz.
Damn, that’s what I get for referencing a show I’ve never watched.
I think Joyce should get a bike of her own.
And it’s a Vespa.
Joyce wants to ride Sal’s Hog…if you know what I mean.
AAAAH! She’s been possessed by Fluffmodeous! Kill it! KILL IT WITH FIRE!
Today’s comic could have been the first panel alone and i would have been happy.
Methinks Joyce is several light years away from understanding the personal nature of ones motorcycle.
Me immediate reaction:
http://img46.imageshack.us/img46/9222/0f58.png
…They didn’t teach Joyce about sarcasm in homeschool, did they?
Yeah, like I said before, the next spell she needs to learn is Detect Sarcasm.
Omfg Joyce. I’m not sure whether to cringe or to laugh. You are too precious for this world, but you do my head in sometimes lol :3
Aw, jeez, Sal… how could you resist those big ol’ baby blues for even a minute?
She’s just SO ADORABLE.
Hee hee.
This is kinda… pitiful. In that adorable, oblivious sort of fashion.
Part of me wants Sal to crush her dreams but the other part wants her to humor Joyce.
Can’t be unseen: That’s her tongue, not her lower gums.
Christians on motorcycles!
All the super-cool kids are calling it a motorbike.
Dem teeth.
her ignorance and inability to understand sarcasm are adorable
Joyce is growing. OH SO SLOWLY. But she’s growing.
If Sal takes off I won’t hold it against her in the slightest because I’d be as annoyed as she looks. Being cute doesn’t give you a “get out of jail for being ignorant and judgmental” card. Sure she stood up to her parents because of Dorothy. But let’s not forget that if she heard what Sal was doing with Jason she’s have a mini aneurysm and shout out “Pre Marital Hanky Panky!”
Try imagining Joyce IRL and not in comic book form please?
What would be MUCH funnier would be if Sal actually got a nasty smirk and took her for a ride; cut to a panel where Sal is speeding while Joyce is gripping her for dear life screaming “Deeeeeeeeaaaaaaar Gawwwwwd maaaaaaaaaaaaaake iiiiiiiiiiiitt sttoooooooooop!”
But most likely she’ll break Joyce’s soul with some bongoy remark because she’s currently not in the best of moods due to recently having seen her parents and fighting with her brother.
I want to see Joyce ride with Sal just for the inevitable accidental boob grope and resulting attack of the gay panic.
dude. i hope she totally gives her a ride. gotta break Joyce out a little notch at a time.
I want Sal to deliver a flat “No” after 8 or so beat panels
This is such a cute strip.
Hey, don’t make fun of Joyce! It’s not nice to mock the sarcasm-impaired.