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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 22d
Bayjmin Tuckles @bayjmin-tuckles.bsky.social ⋅ 17h
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 22d
Brian Tyler Cohen @briantylercohen.bsky.social ⋅ 21h
Mae Dean @maegodhavemercy.com ⋅ 2d
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Happiness.
DON’T FALL FOR, WILLIS IS PLANNING SOMETHING HEINOUS.
I’m gonna feel ashamed ‘a this tomorrow, but screw it:
IT’S A TRAP!
Thanks, Admiral.
Psycho he’s planning on breaking slipshine by making dozens of sexytimes stories, so we go to that website in droves
at least i think that’s what his heinous plot is
DAMN YOU PREEMPTIVELY WILLIS.
Hmm, depending on the dogma involved, you wouldn’t be the first…
They’re happy – quick, Willis, write a happy Ruth/Billie Slipshine right now set in the next five minutes as they have some sober morning-after afterglow sex. It will be sweet and beautiful and it will happen before whatever upcoming horrors you are planning.
**looks at buffer watch**
Are planning? What am I saying. Replace “are planning” with “have already drawn.”
Ive never Awwww’d so hard in my life! the feels are real!!!
Man, it would sure suck to live in a universe where all fate was decided by a capricious creator who enjoyed the suffering of his subjects, using murphy’s law and subverted hubris to constantly turn the happiness of others into tragedy. Can’t imagine THAT.
You tell em, Carol….aaa Cheryl….errrr Cherlene….
DOAaawwwwww!
Unspeakable tragedy in 3… 2… 1?
Probably, unfortunately.
As much as I want these two to be happy, there is no way it is going to be perfect. Not in a David Willis comic and especially not with these two. Hopefully they can make it through whatever curve ball swings passed these two. However, with how this started, there’s no way it’ll be a small one. More like a curve meteor.
I am very, very much hoping that Willis is being double sadistic and not going to actually do anything ta these two, just to make us even more paranoid and freaked out than usual.
With the way time passes in this comic, he could draw it out for ages. Five years from now we’ll still be waiting for the other shoe to drop, while he cackles with glee.
He has been known to wait SEVEN YEARS to complete a superpunch to the feels.
http://www.shortpacked.com/2006/comic/book-2-pulls-the-drama-tag/06-the-drama-tag/burn/
(And SPOILER alert) http://www.shortpacked.com/index.php?id=1806
Keep in mind the title of this chapter…
Law of Willis 33: Happy characters will always be counteracted with 3 times as much suffering and emotional roller coasters until they’re finally left alone.
Wait, so how da Hell has Walky been left alone ’til now? Statistical anomaly?
His roommate is Mike. Just because we haven’t seen the suffering doesn’t mean that Mike hasn’t set up a chicken shop with abnormally cheap chicken nuggets to pull Walky in. So Walky will be eating fifty nuggets at a time while Mike subtly uses a combination of carefully placed dorm room posters and trigger words to train Walky until the nuggets he turned to whenever he needed pepping up actually make things worse for him whenever he has them.
So Willis is totally familiar with the Wiccan Rule of Three, good to know. XD
Nah. I think Ruth’s fears are probably ungrounded. They’re dysfunctional self-loathing alcoholics who’ve started a relationship based on the mutual disrespect of eachother’s boundaries. They’re gonna have enough on their plate without needing the any new kind of pain thrown at them from outside of all this. Their moment of happiness, nice as it is, just isn’t sustainable enough to warrant that.
Well… her reciprocal sexing for a charge on her floor may or may not be an issue. Especially as it could be the beneficial catalysis in them both getting help. Her slapping the dong on Agatha, is likely to be the real issue. Unprovoked physical assault tends to take things to another level.
Oops. Slapping the dong on Mary. Not Agatha.
Willis, I swear to God, you better not screw this over.
He will, it’s how he sustains himself.
*Sighs* Yeah, I know.
#GODDAMNITWILLIS
It’s how he sustains himself and all us little drama vampires. There’s a reason we keep coming back you know.
The Willis giveth, and we’re waiting for him to taketh away again.
I was not in safety, neither had I rest, neither was I quiet; yet sexy lesbian trouble came.
Oh god…
I was wrong about this ship. I don’t like this ship.
That’s ironic cuz it’s one of the FEW canon ships I DO like.
This and AmberxDanny. The others I don’t care for.
Amber and Danny is cool. Billie and Ruth is aight. Everyone else are lame to me.
Awww. I like Dorothy and Walky as a couple!
What about Sierra x Yotome?
(Gah, fat-fingers, I do know how to spell Yotomoe.)
I think we ALL support that ship!
Haha, I said Canon ships!
I *love* this ship!
Really? Cause personally I’m squeeing
well, i LOVE this ship….
i’m sure the titanic was very popular too.
great, now the universe is just gonna muck things up even worse
How could things possibly get wor-( the next day, someones in a comma ) Damnit.
How the Hell da ya stuff an entire person inta somthing as small as a comma?
It’s easier if they’re a chameleon
Yeah, but then they come and go
Today’s comic: Ruth and Billie came but Ruth didn’t go
I rather hope not.
(I’m not sorry)
I dunno. I remember one time you were pretty unhappy. And then trucks happened.
Yes Willis, it is making us antsy.
itch itch itch oh dear god what’s going to happen next
For some reason I want to see them In eachother’s glasses.
For some reason I want to see them in each other’s asses.
That is not how you 69
For some reason I want them to have sex.
What horrible tragedy will intervene here? I’m betting on something happening to Walky as he’s out trying to find out what happened to Billie.
What do you mean?
Joyce, Walky, Mike, Dorothy, Joe,
Sarah, Sal and Dina ( she gets swept up in the crowd ) , and Mary are about to head a search party and Start by knocking on Ruth’s door.
MAybe there will be a fire-alarm; but they are about to get caught being seen together.
Its about Time Ruth fell into Mikes orbit and vice-versa.
Hmm If Mike suggests they tie him up, I bet they will! That could be an interesting slipshine.
…what are you plotting, Willis?
My guess, the feels ya got right now? Take them, turn ’em inside out, and shove it in a jar full ‘a broken glass.
When you say universe you mean Willis right ? P.S : this is fucking adorable.
Somewhere, Leslie feels an inexplicable wave of loneliness. She curls up into a ball and puts Ellen on TV.
Meanwhile, Daisy is masturbating furiously. Doesn’t even know why. Just got the itch.
And at the same time 3 girls have ran away from Joe in fear of the Raging hard on in his pants that for some reason he can’t explain.
And somewhere far away a child lets go of a red balloon and cries as it floats away from him.
And we all know who she means by “the universe.”
Why can’t I say Dina is the main character of Dumbing of age? Oh, wait, it’s just me obsessed with her.
I agree!
It would almost be cute if it wasn’t so tragic.
I don’t care if he said no one will die. Someone is about to die! Please make it a random insect.
No. He will make a specific insect.
Squirrel http://www.dumbingofage.com/2014/comic/book-4/02-i-was-a-teenage-churchmouse/crankier/ will be run over by a truck. It’s the only reason it’s a named and tagged character.
NO! Not Squirrel! *cries*
It’s only a small death …
Yes, we are antsy. Thank you for noticing.
just waiting for the other shoe to drop
Oh, Billie. You and your self-repairing hair.
Is it just me or does it seem like we are all just waiting for the other shoe to drop?
It seems that we have been trained not to accept any stable relationship besides Dorothy/Walky
Just being a wee pedantic here, but Dorothy/Walky isn’t really stable… Just more stable than those around them.
If even that…
I would not have expected Billie to have her cynicism melt away this completely after one night/long nap with Ruth.
I’m glad the two of them are happy here, but man does it feel weird to see them both smiling at the same time.
And suddenly… a truck comes through the room and runs over Ruth.
The happiest hangover ever.
The last time Ruth was this happy, she found out Billie was drinking alcohol behind her back.
But now she’s drinking it to her face.
…Progress?
I don’t like our relationship Mr. Willis. You give me happy and it just makes me flinch. They’re going to be hit by a meteor aren’t they?
I believe! I believe! It’s stupid but I believe!
/weeps
So if we clap really hard maybe they won’t die?
Truck through the dorm wall
Well that went better than I expected.
Now we hafta wait for Willis to find out and correct his mistake.
I like the mythology gag that is Billie’s “97” shirt.
Wha?… I’m slow apparently could you explain?
The year Roomies started, I think.
More specifically, the year in which Billie herself was introduced to Roomies.
‘i bet all this happiness is making you guys antsy, huh’
Mr. Willis, you are, as always, 100% pure evil.
Hey, look up there! It’s a shoe! Just hanging up there, like it’s waiting to do something…
Yup, right next to the sword of Damocles.
There’s going to be so much awful for these two over the next day. I can smell it. Nobody is allowed to ever be happy for a protracted period of time, except Joyce, and even that happiness is to be tempered with soul-crushing doubt and the big sad when she discovers that people aren’t laughing WITH her.
And that’s when a bolt of lightning hit the dorm, starting a fire that burned it to the ground.
Willis I’m on to you , every one is on high alert, I read the hover text, and there’s a bit of four shadowing. You are planning some shit and we don’t like it.
i have recently leveled up to five shadowing
I thought that happens when people forget to shave
Double internets for you both! (Not that Willis needs another internet . . .)
Yeah, he’s already Pornlord of one already.
If everyone can’t remember it, it been fivegotten.
My cousin’s hairline is receding. His forehead is now a fivehead.
Alright, alright, enough Victor Borge impressions.
And here I thought you were just trying to show Tom Bautik how to write miserable people and still have it be interesting instead of boring and annoying.
4 five-related puns! I love this!
Tomorrow, the Maple Leafs shall once again lose a major game, as is their wont, and Billie will say something stupid about the fact.
Too early yet, it’s only mid-to-late September in-comic training camp has only just started.
And everybody training loses. Even the training side that wins manages to lose.
I was actually going to comment that Willis covered the sad stuff happening part by reminding us all that Ruth is a Maple Leafs fan.
Also, Opus, there is no good time to be a Maple Leafs fan. Training camp is only false hope…
…and that could actually be a parallel to this strip oh crap.
I’m sorry, I have to do it.
Your mother and I are very disapointed in you.
I had love once.
And then you turned into a crow?
Love. not even once.
Antsy? Nah. There’s potential for this to blow up in the next few strips, but I feel like Billie’s clever enough to not get caught with her pants down (so to speak). This’ll bear some traction for a while. Not forever, but a while. My money’s on misdirection.
You know what I’m waiting for? Danny and Ethan to kiss… and get caught. Danny hates himself. Ethan hates himself and Danny. Amber hates herself, Danny and Ethan. Joyce hates herself, Danny, Ethan, and Danny again for good measure. I can’t square it with the story at the moment, but it’s the most devastating blow to the social circle that I can think of right now, and even though it’ll be heartbreaking I can’t look at such a perfectly aligned powder keg and not want to light a spark just a little. (Plus it ends with everyone hating Danny, which the creator would likely consider a plus.)
Or I could be completely wrong.
To be honest, I have a hard time seeing Danny cheating considering how guilty he felt about the little day dream with Amber.
Now I have no idea what Amber would do if he admitted to day dreaming about Ethan. Probably a really bad idea.
I’m mostly replying because I’m amused at the thought of our three avatars in a row, but all in all I’m on the misdirection side.
Or they could resolve their differences with a four-way Slipshine…
Yeah, I don’t see cheating in Danny’s future, his loyalty is one of his most defining features.
As for Amber, I think her reaction to finding out Danny fantasised about kissing Ethan would be to excuse herself and have the best masterbatory session of her life. Girl likes the mansex and has the hots for both of them.
yeah, I’m pretty sure that’s going to be the next bombshell
all the other drama has been resolved for now (except for sal and amber, I guess)
Fuuuuuuucc******** I really hope the bad side happens to someone else this time. I really like Ruth, especially in DoA.
D’awwwwwww!
(Come on, someone had to say it)
I kind of want to stop reading the strip right now, so that I can just imagine they’ll be happy and stay happy.
I don’t care what happens next, because right here, right now, Billie and Ruth share a tender moment together where both are awake, sober, happy and have their guards down. Whatever comes next, there will always be this morning.
My thought too. I like seeing both of them happy, and at the same time! And together! I think I can enjoy that moment whatever happens next.
(And coming from NC this morning: whoo-hoo! for any couple who’s waited and waited to be officially married.)
Happy intermission tonight.
Tomorrow, back to the drama.
OMG…THE HAPPINESS!!!!
It occurs to me that Willis could simply leave these two hanging, happy for now, knowing that the anticipation of disaster is torturing his readers for once, instead of his characters.
that’s not as fun for willis though…
Oh, come on. You know our tears sustain him.
yes willis. yes it is.
The happiness is nice but I know better than to think it will last long. It’s like being a Buffalo Bills fan, you get a few wins and you start to think “maybe this is the season we get to the super bowl for the first time in YEARS” and then they lose every game up to the end of the season and you’re left in an eternal pit of sadness.
And now I ship them with the Leafs. WTH, brain.
Keep on truckin you two.
… that is the worst, most dark pun I have ever read. I’m not sure if I should applaud you or run away crying.
Mr. Willis, of course it makes us antsy. You’ve trained us all to expect these kinds of good things to never last.
That said, I’m expecting at least a moment’s reprieve here since this has been building up for so long in our, the audience’s and author’s, relative time… 20 bloody months since that first forced kiss, over 2 years since she barged into Billie & Sal’s room with beer, and 3.5 years since that night in Ruth’s closet…
Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.
I told my partner there was a new Dumbing of Age and he looked over my shoulder and said “Oh no, they’re happy. That can’t be good.”
This is like seeing the main pairing in a fanfic be all happy and together and in love then looking up and realizing you’re in chapter 2 of 10.
WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO TO THEM YOU MONSTER?
I will admit, it might be BUGGING me a little.
unfortunately, pun threads only fly in this comments section if you post them early
Billie, Ruth, don’t fall for the Cthaeh Paradox. If everything will be bad, let it come. Feeling bad now because it will be bad latter just increases the amount of misery you will feel before your inevitable expiration. That’s the what the Cthaeh wants, don’t give the fucker that small pleasure.
Yep. These crazy kids will be ok!
I am going to go to sleep pretending that this is the last strip in DoA and Ruth & Billie live happily ever after…
Except that if DoA was over, *I* would not be living happily ever after…! Damn it! Okay, Ruth—it’s your happiness or mine!!! Back away from the Billie with your hands up!
suddenly, truck through the wall, Ruth sacrifices herself by throwing Billie out of the way.
To Mr. Willis. Thanks for the “Beginning of Week” button. It will be useful.
you know, Willis is probably going, “hmmmm….everyone already knows something bad is going to happen, so how do I proceed….I KNOW! I’ll not do anything to this relationship, but every time they come up, I will use subtle hints in the alt-text that something bad will happen next time!” At least, thats what I would do.
Oh yeah! Antsy!!
Won’t bother to ask what’s next, you won’t tell anyway.
AW!!!!
I feel a “Damn You Willis” coming on…
Fuck you, Willis. I am an an ant; I’ve been antsy before reading this.
FOR THE COLONY!
I’m giving it a week before somebody is crying in the shower while Evanescence’s “Good Enough” plays. How Willis will give DoA a soundtrack, I leave as an exercise for the reader.
Link in the description?
Whom the God that some call Willis will destroy, he first makes happy.
Now lets celebrate our happiness with a shot or 7
You know what? Just to be different I’m going to defy the trend and assume everything is gonna be super special awesome for Billie and Ruth for like weeks and weeks and any bad shit that happens will happen to other people for awhile. Cause I believe in Willis! I trust that he would never deliberately crush our hopes and dreams just as they had come to be realized!
Does something smell like brimstone in here?
“Yeah, right, brimstone. Don’t be talking about no brimstone. I know what I smelled, it wasn’t no brim and it didn’t come off no stone neither… “
fuck yes Shrek is master movie
Well, let’s be honest. We all thought this ship was dead like three times before now. And yet here we are! I’d say there is clearly reason to have hope even during the roughest seas.
Nobody said anything about torpedoes.
You are killing me with extra cuteness, you are killing me.
Bad things happen when Ruth is at peace with herself.
Everything is right with the world!
*Read’s hover text*
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kNNHs7lbUJQ
This strip is the first time I actually noticed Billie being half asian.
Okay, so about three red flags were shot off with every sentence here, but they still seem happy and adorable…
The happiness does not make me antsy.
The alt text, however….
Only a matter of time before the organic fertilizer impacts the oscillating air circulatory device.
the peat thumps the windmill? =B
Aw, cute. Now where is that shoe….*looks up*
Still nailed to the wall?
What’s there to be antsy about? You’ll drama them up some more, I’ll savor it as I savor the happy feels, and the comic moves on :3
I suspect that Ruth angles for being the “big liar” here, but strictly speaking she is actually skirting the question quite deftly.
I see a career as government official before her. She’s pulling an Alexander on Billie here, the art of making people believe you told them something that you can technically deny never to have meant.
Sleazy politicians always try for “plausible deniability”. Ruth is well past that now. She’s in new and uncharted territory, and isn’t quite sure what to do or say, but she’s not holding back. What she says in panel 2 is not what you’d say if you’re stringing someone along.
Or maybe I’m just a hopeless romantic.
Just to recap this arc (damn you, Willis, why can’t I just select two tags at the same time?!?)…
Pick
Supposed To
Tired
Never
Eventually
Four
Asking
Facedown
Terrible
Argh, missed Pact between Facedown and Terrible.
Those actually worked pretty well if put back to back.
You can actually select multiple tags at once. You’ve got to edit the URL to add the extra tags separated with ‘+’. Like so: http://www.dumbingofage.com/tag/billie+ruth/
I forget who I learned that from, but it’s been incredibly handy.
That seems remarkably like we could construct a meaningful sentence out of it. Hmm.
“Eventually four, never asking, supposed to pick…”
At least for today’s strip, say it with me. *inhales* d’awwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
Stay with me
And you’ll be
In a world of emotional manipulation
I mean for real, if I was starting to date someone and they were like “stay even if I tell you to go, and you’ll always have to guess what I’m thinking because I won’t say it outright” I would run like hell.
So it’s more of a sexy lesbian suicide watch?
Yep; well..all done! So nice of Mr. Willis to end DoA on such a lovely upbeat note. I’ll just see myself out now. That Buffer Watch was a sweet piece of misdirection, I must say… God job Willis!
Of all the things in this strip, that moment of happiness between the two of them was what I hoped they’d have most of all. You can face a large tonnage of really bad shit with someone at your side if you both have a perfect (or even near-perfect) moment to share.
Thank you Willis!
The sequel begins tomorrow. It will be called Dumbing of Age and chronicle the events starting moments after today’s page.
Antsy? No point being antsy. Soul-crushing despair is inevitable. Trying to predict or counter-predict it is a waste of time. Better to just enjoy the happy while it lasts.
*reclines into deck chair, basks in sunlight, sips piña colada*
I’ve spent the last few hours marathoning the last year of the comic, and I feel a strange and amazing feeling that this page was posted during the time that it took me to do that.
Looking at my internet history, a few is 6. This is like drugs.
That means it was posted 21 minutes before you started.
Well it wasn’t EXACTLY 6 hours. And I know for a fact this wasn’t the most recent page when I started.
Damn you, Willis!
This isn’t preemptive. This is for making me NOT like characters being happy.
Screw it. Seeing these two happy together… I don’t care what your hover text says, Willis, I’m going to enjoy this moment when it happens! If things eventually go bad, then you can enjoy the sweet, salty taste of my tears as a take a deep breath, throw my head back, and shout out into the heavens, “Damn you, Willis!”
But for now…
Thank you, Willis!
(Between this and Marten and Claire, it has been a good week for my ships!)
Ah, bugger… I meant to say, “enjoy this moment as it happens.” As in, the moment happening now. “When it happens might be taken to imply I am gleefully anticipating the moment prophesized by the hover text… Which I am not.
Gah, we need an edit button! (Um… Damn you, Willis?)
Where’s the Doctor? The universe is broken.
Because it doesn’t like Ruth happy. DOCTOR WHERE ARE YOU?!
I just hope author won’t try to FIX their happiness here with some drunk car accident.
I think I’m just gonna stop reading here.
You don’t know how Willis’ comics work. You think you’ll stop reading, but withing five minutes of the next day starting you will start getting an itch that gets worse every minute.
She didn’t say it, so Willis won’t ruin it, right?
That’s exactly how she said it would work.
But she’s thinking it, and that’s all the excuse he needs.
maybe i’m being to optimistic but i think we are safe for a while. I think the oncoming tragedy torpedo isn’t targeting this ship
This ship IS the oncoming tragedy torpedo.
By “the Universe”, does Ruth mean “Willis”?
WELL THIS SEEMS LIKE THE BASIS OF A PERFECTLY HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP.
*scree* thank…i mean damn… i mean thank you willis
Damn you preemptively, Willis!
and damn you preemptively for the thing after that too Willis.
Some thing is going to ruin this I know it. Damn it Willis!
Smiling Ruth and Billie? Happy? OMG it’s the next to the last sign of the apocalypse!!! Time to fire up my KSP designed spaceship. I’m not waiting for the Joyce-Dorothy Slipshine to hit, it would be too late to escape.
What!? You pussy! You get back here and face the apocalypse like a man! No amount of fire and death should stop any Willis fan from waiting for that Joyce-Dorothy Slipshine!
We have a spy among us!
The car is a spy!
Man screw you Willis, now I feel like shit’s going to hit the fan again. I should be enjoying this happiness, but I’m not and it’s because of YOU.
Mind you, this strip came just after Ruth interpreting they’re relationship as a “sexy lesbian suicide pact”.
I don’t think this is supposed to make us happy.
AND THEN THE FIRE NATION ATTACKED!
You’re a clever girl, Ruth. Always watch out for Murphy’s law. *Thumbs up*
I’m SO SCARED for them oh my god.
Smiling Billie is like a whole new character. Maybe a non-evil twin or a changeling put there by a good fairy?
… Billie, give Ruth a hug.
Ruth and Billie, get to the campus counseling center. Like, ASAP. Preferably like yesterday, or maybe last week.
Panel 2.
I don’t care your threats David, this is the cutest moment and nothing can change that. Thanks.
cute smiles on re-heads week. Bravo David Willis and also Jeff at QC,
“The Universe” Also known as Willis.
DAMN YOU WILLIS!
Look the two of them already went through some pretty bad shit, so there is no reason ruin their lives again. Don’t make us sad for these two anymore, let them stay happy and in love.
Awww <3
“I bet all this is making you guys antsy, huh”, Willis said, generously dowsing the area surrounding the chairs we were tied to with gasoline.