Dumbing of Age Book Twelve

Dumbing of Age

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June 1, 2026

Endgame

by David M Willis on March 5, 2018 at 12:01 am
  • 03 - Faz Is Great
└ Tags: amber, danny, faz, joe

Discussion (150) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. Ana Chronistic
    Ana Chronistic
    March 5, 2018 at 12:05 am | #

    Hey, he’s got a LOT of bras and panties!

  2. Doctor_Who
    Doctor_Who
    March 5, 2018 at 12:05 am | #

    But they only said “panty raids” twice. I thought you had to say it three times before BeetleJoes appeared in a cloud of Axe.

    • EvilMidnightLurker
      EvilMidnightLurker
      March 5, 2018 at 12:08 am | #

      Joe is but the herald. Say it one more time and Happosai appears.

      • LeslieBean4Shizzle
        LeslieBean4Shizzle
        March 5, 2018 at 12:13 am | #

        … wow. Of all the things I expected to read here, a Ranma 1/2 reference was not amoung them. Tip of the hat for that one, EvilMidnightLurker.

        • Arawn
          Arawn
          March 5, 2018 at 12:33 am | #

          Happosai Burst!

    • PB
      PB
      March 5, 2018 at 2:09 am | #

      University may vex me
      Still I yearn for antics sexy
      I now summon the thief of clothes
      BeetleJoes
      BeetleJoes
      BEETLEJOES!

  3. AnvilPro
    AnvilPro
    March 5, 2018 at 12:06 am | #

    Time for big brother Joe to steer Faz straight!

    • unrachel
      unrachel
      March 5, 2018 at 12:58 am | #

      Faz is already far too straight

      • thejeff
        thejeff
        March 5, 2018 at 8:13 am | #

        Are you sure?

    • Eldritch Gentleman
      Eldritch Gentleman
      March 5, 2018 at 7:56 am | #

      Straight into a dumpster with a bit of luck.

  4. ValdVin
    ValdVin
    March 5, 2018 at 12:07 am | #

    Joe…old Joe, that is…Faz would be suitable punishment.

  5. Kris
    Kris
    March 5, 2018 at 12:07 am | #

    Everyone overanalyze that “I think” line! That’s troubling probably!

    • Doctor_Who
      Doctor_Who
      March 5, 2018 at 12:11 am | #

      I mean, I think I had too many french fries for dinner tonight (Damn you, Five Guys). I can’t be certain, I’ve only my memory to rely on. Perhaps I actually had a salad and some cottage cheese.

      …Think my waistline will buy it?

    • King Daniel
      King Daniel
      March 5, 2018 at 12:13 am | #

      Amber’s already been ſhown to not be remembering her “nightly adventures” anymore. This is juſt Amber admitting it to someone elſe for the firſt time.

      (as an aſide, I’m trying to uſe the long-s more 😀)

      • Marsh Maryrose
        Marsh Maryrose
        March 5, 2018 at 12:22 am | #

        King Daniel, stop trying to make long-s happen. It’s not going to happen!

        • UniqueSnowflake2
          UniqueSnowflake2
          March 5, 2018 at 12:25 am | #

          That’s too bad; it used to be an integral part of our language.

          • Reltzik
            Reltzik
            March 5, 2018 at 12:30 am | #

            Careful. If Emperor’s around, puns might get you sum-arily imprisoned.

          • Marsh Maryrose
            Marsh Maryrose
            March 5, 2018 at 1:12 am | #

            So did thorn, yogh, ash, and eth. I don’t miss them. Do you?

            Personally, I think we haven’t reformed spelling <b?enough. The letter “C” has had a reign of confusion that has gone on far too long.

            • Marsh Maryrose
              Marsh Maryrose
              March 5, 2018 at 1:17 am | #

              Baka! Do the open/close tags first, and fill in the contents afterword.

            • Reltzik
              Reltzik
              March 5, 2018 at 6:13 am | #

              I dunno. Eth seems to me less like it was integral and more like it was derivative.

            • Kryss LaBryn
              Kryss LaBryn
              March 5, 2018 at 7:03 am | #

              I personally am partial to thorn and use it semi-regularly; but I have a 10th century Norse persona in a Medieval recreation group, so.

              Can I just say that having the formal/plural and informal/familiar you/thou back again would be really freaking helpful sometimes? “Y’all” isn’t always appropriate.

              • Kamino Neko
                Kamino Neko
                March 5, 2018 at 10:01 am | #

                I use thou and thee a bunch, though usually to make a point about the singular they.

              • Clif
                Clif
                March 5, 2018 at 8:28 pm | #

                Y’all isn’t always appropriate? Herisy, I say herrasy!

                • David DeLaney
                  David DeLaney
                  March 6, 2018 at 8:24 pm | #

                  Well, it’s true!

                  … sometimes you absolutely require “all y’all”.

                  –Dave, pronouning weirds examples

            • Charlie Spencer
              Charlie Spencer
              March 5, 2018 at 8:09 am | #

              The ‘C’ is completely useless. Ditto ‘Q’. And don’t get me started on cursive.

            • Kamino Neko
              Kamino Neko
              March 5, 2018 at 9:59 am | #

              Thorn and eth are, in fact, a loss. ‘Th’ has two different pronunciations, which map to them.

              For the other two, due to pronunciation drift, yogh would really only be useful as an etymological marker, and ash’s usefulness as an English letter over the non-ligature ‘ae’, or simply e, is debatable. (And it is still used, though less commonly.)

              • No Name
                No Name
                March 5, 2018 at 12:25 pm | #

                Actually, since “yogh” made two sounds (a “y” sound and a “gh” sound (which sounds a bit like a cat’s hiss)) it would be a useful replacement for all the silent gh’s out there. Not so sure about the ones that make “f” sounds now, thouʒ (the one in ghost was due to the Dutch printers trying use Dutch orthography rules for English – they inserted an h into gost)

                • Kamino Neko
                  Kamino Neko
                  March 5, 2018 at 1:42 pm | #

                  Actually, since “yogh” made two sounds

                  That’s kind of my point, though – it, as well as the variant pronunciations of the ‘gh’ digraph, is why it’s disuse isn’t a huge loss.

                  Ȝ, like the ‘gh’ digraph, wouldn’t be as useful a guide to pronunciation as the ‘y’ that replaced it as the glyph for the /j/ sound, and would really only be a marker of the etymology, and, occasionally, for distinguishing homophones, but for places where it was ‘gh’, the digraph does that perfectly well, and I can’t think of any case where it would do either for /j/ words.

            • thejeff
              thejeff
              March 5, 2018 at 10:25 am | #

              A Plan for the Improvement of English Spelling:
              For example, in Year 1 that useless letter “c” would be dropped to be replased either by “k” or “s”, and likewise “x” would no longer be part of the alphabet.

              The only kase in which “c” would be retained would be the “ch” formation, which will be dealt with later.

              Year 2 might reform “w” spelling, so that “which” and “one” would take the same konsonant, wile Year 3 might well abolish “y” replasing it with “i” and iear 4 might fiks the “g/j” anomali wonse and for all.

              Jenerally, then, the improvement would kontinue iear bai iear with iear 5 doing awai with useless double konsonants, and iears 6-12 or so modifaiing vowlz and the rimeining voist and unvoist konsonants.

              Bai iear 15 or sou, it wud fainali bi posibl tu meik ius ov thi ridandant letez “c”, “y” and “x” — bai now jast a memori in the maindz ov ould doderez — tu riplais “ch”, “sh”, and “th” rispektivli.

              Fainali, xen, aafte sam 20 iers ov orxogrefkl riform, wi wud hev a lojikl, kohirnt speling in ius xrewawt xe Ingliy-spiking werld.

              Attributed, probably falsely, to Mark Twain.

              • hof1991
                hof1991
                March 5, 2018 at 11:27 am | #

                Melvil Dewey of the Dewey Decimal system was also a simplified speller. Started using Dui as his last name.

              • No Name
                No Name
                March 5, 2018 at 5:55 pm | #

                Y’know, I never understood the hate for double letters. Sure, they don’t lengthen the sound of the consonant itself, but they do serve a purpose in English orthography: they shorten the previous vowel! That’s why you learn to double the last consonant in short words with short last syllables when adding “ing”, “ed” or “es”, provided the last letter isn’t an x, part of a digraph (th, sh, ch, gh, ng), or already paired up (any other pair of consonants). It’s also why I’ll always spell “bussing” et al. with two s’s – no one says “omnibus” any more.

                Also, I’m pretty sure Mark Twain spoke with a rhotic accent, and even if he didn’t, he had to have known rhotic vs. non-rhotic was the defining feature separating American English from British English. So it was almost definitely not him (letez, doderez). Wouldn’t put it past Jonathan Swift, though.

                • thejeff
                  thejeff
                  March 5, 2018 at 7:42 pm | #

                  Mostly I just like the almost unreadable gibberish by the end.

              • Krys Brynhildr
                Krys Brynhildr
                March 5, 2018 at 10:02 pm | #

                See, I thought at first that this was the “Ahnold one” that was floating around a while after he became the Governator. Probably what inspired that joke though.

            • No Name
              No Name
              March 5, 2018 at 12:16 pm | #

              Thorn and eth performed valuable functions! Ever since the French showed up with their tee-aitches and the Dutch with their printing-presses we’ve been stuck with the same digraph for two very different sounds!
              And yes, I saw Kamino’s comment before posting this one, it just bears repeating.

              • StoneyB
                StoneyB
                March 5, 2018 at 1:12 pm | #

                ‘Fraid not. When Þ and ð were current both were used indifferently for both the voiced and the voiceless sound.

                • No Name
                  No Name
                  March 5, 2018 at 6:11 pm | #

                  Yes, I know, but so were s and z, and f and v. And it wasn’t actually indiscriminate. The þ, s and f were voiceless in most positions, but were voiced when placed between vowels, because that’s just the way Old and Middle English worked. Z’s and v’s were predominately used in loan words from Latin and Greek and for the most part were treated the exact same way as s and f, and the only reason ð (a fancy d with a stroke, the capital form isn’t even fancy) even exists is because when English finally started differentiating it’s voiced and voiceless fricatives (around the Late Middle/ Early Modern period), there was an orthographic gap.

                • Inahc
                  Inahc
                  March 5, 2018 at 6:37 pm | #

                  Possessive its has no apostrophe. (Normally I’d try not to say anything, but you’re already talking about English!)

                • Inahc
                  Inahc
                  March 5, 2018 at 6:53 pm | #

                  interestingly, I just stumbled on an exception to the rule of pronouns not using apostrophes: possessive “one” is “one’s”. https://groups.google.com/forum/#!topic/alt.possessive.its.has.no.apostrophe/uU8ij7ANNe0

                • No Name
                  No Name
                  March 5, 2018 at 7:06 pm | #

                  Shoot! I’m usually good about that. Ah well.

                • thejeff
                  thejeff
                  March 5, 2018 at 7:52 pm | #

                  Give it a few more decades and it will.
                  If we’re talking about straightening out the spelling, might as well regularize some of the sillier grammatical accidents of history.
                  Interestingly, the possessive for “it” originally had an apostrophe, losing it by the early 19th century.

            • David DeLaney
              David DeLaney
              March 6, 2018 at 8:23 pm | #

              … aren’t yogh, ash, and thorn essential ingredients for keeping the Fae away?

              –Dave, and if so, what does this say that James Nicoll hasn’t already said about the current state of our English as she is wrote?

      • Reltzik
        Reltzik
        March 5, 2018 at 12:29 am | #

        The long-s is just a poor man’s substitute for large-s.

        *flees for dear punning life*

      • Rabid Rabbit
        Rabid Rabbit
        March 5, 2018 at 12:55 am | #

        Pfft, you’re not being a real punctuation ſnob unleſſ you’re uſing ðornſ aſ well: http://www.thebrightsidecomic.com/chapter-30-p377/

        • LaduSwala
          LaduSwala
          March 5, 2018 at 1:14 am | #

          Noooo, not a new interesting webcomic to start reading at 1 am!

          • Rabid Rabbit
            Rabid Rabbit
            March 5, 2018 at 1:18 am | #

            I have no regrets. (Sorry, I mean “no regretſ”.) That webcomic is brilliant and deserves to be far better known.

            • LaduSwala
              LaduSwala
              March 5, 2018 at 1:29 am | #

              Oh yeah, I’m 4 chapters in already and it’s oddly charming and delightful. Thank you for sharing!

              • Rabid Rabbit
                Rabid Rabbit
                March 5, 2018 at 4:25 am | #

                Your avatar makes that a particularly delightful response.

        • Kamino Neko
          Kamino Neko
          March 5, 2018 at 9:11 am | #

          Ðat’s an eð, not a þorn. Ðey’re two totally different letters, alðough ðey boþ represent sounds represented by ‘th’ in standard English orþography.

          (And, unlike the long s, reintroducing ðem would serve a purpose, as ðey represent different sounds, and ðus would be a better pronunciation guide.)

        • Kamino Neko
          Kamino Neko
          March 5, 2018 at 9:41 am | #

          Also, you’re misusing the long s. It’s not used for the last letter – unleſs, þorns, as. (Also, although you didn’t use a word thus spelt, it’s also only used for the first of a double s, even in the middle of a word – so miſsile, frex.)

      • Marsh Maryrose
        Marsh Maryrose
        March 5, 2018 at 1:41 am | #

        So, in Shakespeare’s The Tempest, the sprite Ariel sings:

        Where the bee sucks, there suck I
        In a cowslip’s bell I lie

        This was set to music by Robert Johnson (among many others), and it’s a lovely little piece. But the primary reason one of my friends brought it to the attention of my Early Music group’s mentor had to do with the way that it looks on the : printed page/a>.

      • Needfuldoer
        Needfuldoer
        March 5, 2018 at 1:58 am | #

        I haven’t seen this many long s-es since using them as shorthand for “folder” on System 7. (It only allowed 31 characters in file and folder names, we had to make them count! It made them easy to type, something like Option-S.)

        • Durandal_1707
          Durandal_1707
          March 5, 2018 at 2:06 am | #

          Those weren’t long s-es, they were what Unicode calls “Latin Small Letter F With Hook”. The keystroke was option-F; ƒ. Hey, it still works!

          • Needfuldoer
            Needfuldoer
            March 5, 2018 at 6:56 pm | #

            Yes! That was it! Somebody around here keeps using the long S and it blurred in my mind. They look the same to me! There’s only so much definition you could get with so few pixels.

            (Also, it figures the answer comes from someone with a Marathon gravatar.

      • Durandal_1707
        Durandal_1707
        March 5, 2018 at 2:10 am | #

        Just be aware that I intend to imagine an outrageous lisp when reading any post that contains a long s in it.

        • Rabid Rabbit
          Rabid Rabbit
          March 5, 2018 at 2:18 am | #

          ſo if I were to ſay ðat ſhe ſellſſeaſhellſ by the ſeaſhore…

          • Deanatay
            Deanatay
            March 5, 2018 at 9:18 am | #

            I’d fay fhe needs a leff obfcure meanf of employment…

            • Deanatay
              Deanatay
              March 5, 2018 at 9:19 am | #

              Dammit, missed an ‘f’

      • Emperor Norton II
        Emperor Norton II
        March 5, 2018 at 2:22 pm | #

        Personally, I think that the English alphabet needs a new* letter for what you normally refer to as an “R”, but which is more like a really, really thick L**.

        *Or possibly re-introduce some old letter that has fallen out of use. Either way.

        **Certain dialects (such as Scottish) are of course using a more proper R sound, and are therefore allowed to keep the R letter.

      • Rowen Morland
        Rowen Morland
        March 5, 2018 at 6:56 pm | #

        That’s pretty disgusting to read.

  6. Zaidyer
    Zaidyer
    March 5, 2018 at 12:07 am | #

    So she thinks she’s been doing stuff at night. Why, that’s not alarming at all!

    • Dara
      Dara
      March 5, 2018 at 12:10 am | #

      They have got to talk this shit out. Shame Amber’s not ready to do it, like, at all. :/

  7. Mr D
    Mr D
    March 5, 2018 at 12:08 am | #

    I predict a lot of Joe-bashing over the next few hours.

  8. Opus the Poet
    Opus the Poet
    March 5, 2018 at 12:08 am | #

    So, all yellow then?

  9. Passchendaele
    Passchendaele
    March 5, 2018 at 12:08 am | #

    Solution: give Faz to Joe, run away. What’s the worst that could happen? 😛

    • Doctor_Who
      Doctor_Who
      March 5, 2018 at 12:12 am | #

      One could learn from the other.

      No, sorry, that’s the second worst thing that could happen.

      Both could learn from the other.

      • Passchendaele
        Passchendaele
        March 5, 2018 at 12:37 am | #

        *thinks*

        *screams*

        Do Not Want!

    • JessWitt
      JessWitt
      March 5, 2018 at 3:52 am | #

      Faz gets passed around the campus like a hot potato, causing carnage everywhere he goes.

  10. Stephen Bierce
    Stephen Bierce
    March 5, 2018 at 12:08 am | #

    The Richard Marx hacked Muzak spin continues…
    I swear I left him with Joe Rosenthal
    I swear I left him safe and sound…

  11. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    March 5, 2018 at 12:08 am | #

    Is Joe hitting on Faz???

    • jeffepp
      jeffepp
      March 5, 2018 at 12:13 am | #

      ….
      Yes.
      Sure.
      Let’s go with that.

      • King Daniel
        King Daniel
        March 5, 2018 at 12:15 am | #

        Well, Joe already knows Amber’s likely going to be his step-sister, and he’s currently “sworn off all women forever” last I checked, so he’s definitely not hitting on Amber.

        …Danny? 😛

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        March 5, 2018 at 12:23 am | #

        Who could possibly resist the great and wonderful Faz?

  12. Keulen
    Keulen
    March 5, 2018 at 12:08 am | #

    I’m pretty sure panty raids stopped being a thing on college campuses decades ago.

    • ZerglingOne
      ZerglingOne
      March 5, 2018 at 12:16 am | #

      Shit, it stopped being a thing in 6th grade camp before I went. And that was in the stone age (1998).

      • Deanatay
        Deanatay
        March 5, 2018 at 9:23 am | #

        That’s not true! I still have the panties I snagged during a raid when I was in coll-

        *realizes that was 25 years ago*

        Imma shut up now.

    • Opus the Poet
      Opus the Poet
      March 5, 2018 at 12:16 am | #

      Well they were still a thing when I went, but that was as you say, decades ago. Four decades to be precise.

      • Marsh Maryrose
        Marsh Maryrose
        March 5, 2018 at 1:59 am | #

        I was in my first round of college — when I was the same age as the DoA cast — exactly four decades ago. It’s kind of a Rashomon experience for me to acknowledge that apparently, in some places, panty raids were in fact a contemporary thing.

        Then again, I was in a small liberal arts college in an area full of small liberal arts colleges, so my own experience may not be particularly relevant on this topic (or any other).

    • Mydnyt
      Mydnyt
      March 5, 2018 at 12:42 am | #

      Panty raids have gone the way of most of the rest of “The Revenge of the Nerds” from being in the category of “Good boys having fun” to “Sexual Assault”

    • Marsh Maryrose
      Marsh Maryrose
      March 5, 2018 at 12:48 am | #

      When I was reading Mad Magazine in the late 60’s, it was still a thing in the minds of the writers of Mad Magazine, who were in college in the 50’s. As far as I can tell, it was one of those things that existed more in popular culture than in fact, and insofar as it did exist in fact, it did so only in the mid-50’s.

      The fact that a fictional floating-timeline 16-year-old could know about panty raids is, I suppose, proof of the persistence of pop culture memes. I suspect the movie Animal House may have played a part in the transmission of this meme.

      • Marsh Maryrose
        Marsh Maryrose
        March 5, 2018 at 12:58 am | #

        I realize now that I was conflating Animal House and Revenge of the Nerds, panty-raid-wise. But both of them have really bad ideas about consent, so [shrug-emoji].

  13. Bagge
    Bagge
    March 5, 2018 at 12:09 am | #

    Yeah, this is perfect! Joe can look after the little creep for awhile and get a lesson in everything that was wrong with his earlier behavior. Faz can have at least a chance of mentorship in the the art of not being a creep. Amber gets both of them off her hands. Everyone wins!

    • Emperor Norton II
      Emperor Norton II
      March 5, 2018 at 12:13 am | #

      …You realise that the title of this comic is not just for show, right?

      • Bagge
        Bagge
        March 5, 2018 at 12:45 am | #

        Faz is great and so is his chapter.

  14. Keulen
    Keulen
    March 5, 2018 at 12:10 am | #

    Even Joe doesn’t deserve Faz.

  15. TrueVCU
    TrueVCU
    March 5, 2018 at 12:10 am | #

    Danny: so, no panties thus far
    Faz: Faz did not say that

  16. Bickendan
    Bickendan
    March 5, 2018 at 12:11 am | #

    Uh oh… Joe, don’t. It’s a trap!

  17. Dave M
    Dave M
    March 5, 2018 at 12:13 am | #

    No wonder Faz annoys Amber so much. Read his dialogue in panel 3, he refers to himself by name and by reference in the one voice bubble. Any programmer will tell you that’s just bad coding!

    • Reltzik
      Reltzik
      March 5, 2018 at 12:32 am | #

      He’s coded in Obfuscated Faz.

  18. brasca1
    brasca1
    March 5, 2018 at 12:15 am | #

    Just when he thought he was out. They pull him back in.

  19. sirconanad
    sirconanad
    March 5, 2018 at 12:15 am | #

    “Amber, let my Faz go!”

  20. tim gueguen
    tim gueguen
    March 5, 2018 at 12:24 am | #

    “Faz will be very happy to learn as much about the ways of manliness as you can teach him, Joe.”

  21. alice
    alice
    March 5, 2018 at 12:25 am | #

    can someone explain what the fuck a panty raid is? that sounds terrifying

    • Some1
      Some1
      March 5, 2018 at 12:31 am | #

      It’s just going around stealing girls panties. Perhaps not right, but terrifying would be a strong word. Then again the most i know about panty raids is from snippets of pop culture, and that one SpongeBob episode.

      • Reltzik
        Reltzik
        March 5, 2018 at 12:37 am | #

        Wikipedia’s article sums it up pretty well.

      • alice
        alice
        March 5, 2018 at 12:49 am | #

        i can assure you that would be a terrifying experience for me.

      • Emily
        Emily
        March 5, 2018 at 6:06 am | #

        Some gross dude breaking into your home and stealing your underwear is pretty fucking terrifying.

      • BBCC
        BBCC
        March 5, 2018 at 10:59 am | #

        ‘Perhaps’ not right?

    • Agemegos
      Agemegos
      March 5, 2018 at 12:43 am | #

      It was a thing that started on college campuses in the US in 1949, in which organised gangs of male students — sometimes hundreds or thousands of them — would force their way into womens’ accommodations and brazenly steal the women’s underwear. They haven’t been a thing since the Seventies.

      In some cases they are supposed to have been some sort of protest against the colleges’ “parietal” rules, segregration of sexes, and chaperone, which attempted to control female students’ sexuality [i]in loco parentis[/i].

      • Some1
        Some1
        March 5, 2018 at 12:47 am | #

        So panty raids are chaotic good?

        • Agemegos
          Agemegos
          March 5, 2018 at 1:07 am | #

          The first ones had a certain amount of wit to them, and the organisers were careful that they should do no real harm while causing great commotion, and consternation to authority. But as often happens with these things they were soon imitated by vandals and brutes as an occasion for exercising illicit power over the weak and for engaging in criminal mischief with impunity.

          • Some1
            Some1
            March 5, 2018 at 2:25 am | #

            So panty raids are communism?

            • Reltzik
              Reltzik
              March 5, 2018 at 5:01 am | #

              No, if they were communism they would be seizing the means of panty-production.

              • Eldritch Gentleman
                Eldritch Gentleman
                March 5, 2018 at 8:28 am | #

                As well as killing the owners of those means of production, everyone who had more panties than party allowed and generally anyone who looked funny at the people doing these things.

        • Huehuetotl
          Huehuetotl
          March 5, 2018 at 1:31 am | #

          No.

      • CJ
        CJ
        March 5, 2018 at 2:40 am | #

        So instead of giving the women the right to choose, male students wanted the right to decide over women?

        • Agemegos
          Agemegos
          March 5, 2018 at 5:57 am | #

          No doubt many did, and others weren’t thinking about what they were doing as much as they should have.

        • thejeff
          thejeff
          March 5, 2018 at 8:25 am | #

          Perhaps, but in many of the early cases, they were encouraged and aided by the women. I suspect it’s more complicated than it looks from our perspective.
          Remember that at the time this started, co-ed colleges were new, women’s dorms had strict curfews and men weren’t allowed. It was a different world.

          • Agemegos
            Agemegos
            March 5, 2018 at 8:17 pm | #

            And its sexual conventions were different — and dangerous and horrible.

            • thejeff
              thejeff
              March 5, 2018 at 10:25 pm | #

              Yes they were, in more ways than one. In restricting women’s choices sexually – both to be sexual and to not be.

              I’m not sure what role panty raids played or were intended to play. A mixed one, quite likely.

    • Mydnyt
      Mydnyt
      March 5, 2018 at 12:44 am | #

      Watch “Revenge of the Nerds”

      It’s a fantastic movie that shows a marked difference between what used to be called “Good College Fun” and now is “Sexual Assault”

      Although admittedly he totally raped her in that bouncey house.

      • Delicious Taffy
        Delicious Taffy
        March 5, 2018 at 6:17 am | #

        “Watch this movie where a girl gets raped, and also lots of sexual assault.”

        No, thanks. That sounds absolutely dreadful.

        • Eldritch Gentleman
          Eldritch Gentleman
          March 5, 2018 at 8:30 am | #

          Sounds like research material in awfulness. Like digging up mass graves to research and document Nazi and Soviet crimes.

    • Sam
      Sam
      March 5, 2018 at 6:20 am | #

      It is basically going to a place with lots of girls e.g. college dorms, camp cabins separated by gender, with a group of guys, to steal their underwear. At the time it was something the girls themselves helped encourage, which is different from media instances where it tends to really just be creepily stealing underwear for no good reason.

  22. Some1
    Some1
    March 5, 2018 at 12:29 am | #

    Dungeons and Dumbing part 20

    Skadi and Danny stood in front of a massive ice wall, which had massive holds that a man could stand on easily, but would be unable to climb between. Like a icy rock wall designed for giants.

    Skadi: You ready?

    Danny: Yeah, how does this work?

    Skadi: Well, you hold onto me, and I climb the wall.

    Danny: What happens if I fall?

    Skadi: Then, you die.

    Danny: Great.

    Skadi lifts Danny into the air and gives him a look of apology.

    Skadi: Sorry, I need both hands, and I don’t trust you on my shoulders.

    Skadi lowered Danny between her breasts so that he was poking out from between her cleavage.

    Danny: Like Wonder Woman and The Atom…

    Skadi: Who’s that?

    Danny: No one really.

    Skadi sighed and placed her foot on the first hold of the wall, slowly she started to climb. If you were to imagine Skadi at a normal size, the wall she climbed would be about 30 feet tall.

    She grunted heavily as she hosted herself up, hold after hold, with frequent checking to make sure Danny hadn’t become jostled from his hold. She didn’t sweat, that was one of the strange parts of her biology, and her body heat gave a feeling that was both warm, but with an occasional piercing gale.

    Soon she reached the top of the cliff and reaching between her bosom, evacuating her passenger.

    Skadi: See that wasn’t so bad.

    Danny: Ugh, I feel like I’m going to throw up.

    Skadi: Okay, maybe it could have been better…but we’re here!

    Danny looked up to see a massive marble structure, a statue lay behind it that seemed to be so large, that it could not possible fit in the area that was granted to hold it. The temple would be large enough to make the giant he stayed with paltry.

  23. Lingo
    Lingo
    March 5, 2018 at 12:41 am | #

    You know, given the way Faz mixes first person and third person, you’d be forgiven for thinking he might have Dissociative Identity Disorder too.

  24. Josh Spicer
    Josh Spicer
    March 5, 2018 at 12:49 am | #

    Joe, no.

    Do not retract many months…weeks…days? of improvement.

    Willis don’t.

  25. DarkoNeko
    DarkoNeko
    March 5, 2018 at 12:50 am | #

    Someone’s about to get stuck on Faz duty

  26. Teddae
    Teddae
    March 5, 2018 at 12:51 am | #

    @alt text: thanks for planting that image in my head

  27. Tacos
    Tacos
    March 5, 2018 at 1:22 am | #

    Oh gee thanks. Like I needed that image in my head alt-text.

  28. cbwroses
    cbwroses
    March 5, 2018 at 2:00 am | #

    Amber would be remiss to leave Faz with Joe. She barely knows Joe and doesn’t especially like him. And Faz doesn’t know Joe at all.
    Joe and Amber may become stepsiblings in the upcoming weeks/months, but that still doesn’t connect Joe and Faz as their relationships to Amber would be through two different marriages, leaving only Amber as the one connection.

    • cbwroses
      cbwroses
      March 5, 2018 at 2:02 am | #

      That said, if Blaine showed up, and Joe’s dad coincidentally showed up with Amber’s mom, and the two dads started fighting, I wouldn’t mind seeing that, provided Blaine lost.

      • Delicious Taffy
        Delicious Taffy
        March 5, 2018 at 6:20 am | #

        Joe’s dad is friggin’ huge. I’d rather not see a murder like that.

        • cbwroses
          cbwroses
          March 5, 2018 at 12:05 pm | #

          Speaking as a huge guy, I can say from my personal experience that size does not guarantee a win by any means, but it usually doesn’t hurt.
          It does give a +2 to intimidation checks, though.

  29. BenRG
    BenRG
    March 5, 2018 at 2:03 am | #

    Comparing Faz to Joe is potentially quite useful for us as an audience because it will help us develop a framework to differentiate between genuinely creepy (Faz) and just plain thoughtless assholery (Joe).

    So, Amazi-Girl has still being doing stuff on her own? I do believe that Danny is the first person Amber has told of her fears in this nature. I do hope that he feels the need to do something about it.

  30. Needfuldoer
    Needfuldoer
    March 5, 2018 at 2:04 am | #

    Faz got his hands on a copy of Animal House, now he assumes college is actually like that.

  31. PB
    PB
    March 5, 2018 at 2:07 am | #

    (barfing)

    (like, for the rest of the day)

    (sorry nothing clever too disappointed and faz’ed out)

  32. CJ
    CJ
    March 5, 2018 at 2:43 am | #

    What is Joe doing? Does he react to “panty raids”, to Amber in distress, to seeing a young boy (he probably has an inner parent that would like to get parenting right)?

    • Bagge
      Bagge
      March 5, 2018 at 2:53 am | #

      I think he still tries to find ways to connect with his step-sis.

      • BenRG
        BenRG
        March 5, 2018 at 3:10 am | #

        Something like: “Is this guy bothering you Amber? Do you want me to hang him from the flagpole by his briefs?”

      • JessWitt
        JessWitt
        March 5, 2018 at 3:48 am | #

        Good lord, being stepsibs with Faz AND Joe?! I’d go into conniptions every so often.

    • thejeff
      thejeff
      March 5, 2018 at 8:29 am | #

      I hate to say, but given the timing and his tone, it pretty much has to be the panty raids.

      “Nobody’s going to want to do any panty raids.”
      “Hellooooooooo”

  33. Rabid Rabbit
    Rabid Rabbit
    March 5, 2018 at 3:28 am | #

    Is it just me, or did Panel 5 Danny just pop a boner at the sight of Joe and is feeling reallym really disturbed by the fact?

    • Delicious Taffy
      Delicious Taffy
      March 5, 2018 at 6:22 am | #

      Posture suggests yes.

  34. ValdVin
    ValdVin
    March 5, 2018 at 3:39 am | #

    Just when Amber seems to have hit the wall of unpleased facial expressions, Joe shows up, and we get the narrowed eyes from Amber in the last panel.

    Great little detail.

  35. JessWitt
    JessWitt
    March 5, 2018 at 3:46 am | #

    Oh look who it is, the person Faz needs least to emulate right now.

  36. Jade
    Jade
    March 5, 2018 at 3:46 am | #

    Are we sure no one dies in this universe?

  37. SillyGoose
    SillyGoose
    March 5, 2018 at 7:58 am | #

    I read Faz’s plan as “pantry raid” at first and was all “Hey that doesn’t sound so bad, teeneage boy, very hungry, makes sense, why’d she mention underwear? … oh.”

  38. FacelessDeviant
    FacelessDeviant
    March 5, 2018 at 8:45 am | #

    Seems to me like there are a lot of unauthorized people on this campus.

    Why not just call campus security and let them deal with Faz: Creep-show-in-training.

    • thejeff
      thejeff
      March 5, 2018 at 10:18 am | #

      Because 1) Being on campus without authorization isn’t illegal. In fact, there’s little in the way of authorization available.
      2) Amber doesn’t hate him badly enough to want to get him in trouble with Blaine, because she knows what that’s like.

      • Kamino Neko
        Kamino Neko
        March 5, 2018 at 12:00 pm | #

        OTOH, he did attempt to walk into the women’s shower, which would be ejection-worthy.

  39. Deanatay
    Deanatay
    March 5, 2018 at 9:31 am | #

    Joe just made a ‘Lenny and Squiggy’ entrance.

  40. SpaceshipPilot
    SpaceshipPilot
    March 5, 2018 at 11:31 am | #

    Amber needs a way to talk to Amazi-Girl. Find out what she’s been doing at night.

    You know, I wonder if AG is just as freaked out by the fact that they’re not sharing memories anymore- or if she’s blocking the memories deliberately…

    • BenRG
      BenRG
      March 5, 2018 at 12:29 pm | #

      There is no way in which this ends painlessly for either of them. Best case scenario is that they learn to integrate well enough that they can share memories and cooperate with each other.

      For some reason, I have a mental image of Danny and Sal walking the halls with what looks like Amber but she keeps switching between the two alters and they even briefly talk to each other. I wonder if this is realistic?

  41. MutantSentry
    MutantSentry
    March 5, 2018 at 3:30 pm | #

    Faz has Roji Panty Complex?

  42. BigDogLittleCat
    BigDogLittleCat
    March 5, 2018 at 11:52 pm | #

    Why is Amber making Faz her responsibility?
    I’d’ve just thrown the little creep out of my room and be done with him. He’d cross some line somewhere, someone would call campus security, and he’d be rounded up. Problem solved.

    He’s revolting and not worth the energy.

    • Nope
      Nope
      March 5, 2018 at 11:57 pm | #

      She’s already known as someone who stabbed someone on campus I guess she doesn’t want to add “the girl whose brother had to be forceably removed from campus for streaking” to that image.

      Plus he’s a minor endangering himself with stupidity and she’s a superhero.

      • Inahc
        Inahc
        March 5, 2018 at 11:59 pm | #

        Also it can be hard to shake off the “But Faaaaaaamily” even with “family” as shitty as her dad.

        • thejeff
          thejeff
          March 6, 2018 at 7:33 am | #

          And she doesn’t want even Faz to get in trouble with Blaine.

  43. Cmd1095
    Cmd1095
    March 6, 2018 at 4:44 pm | #

    So her disassociation has reached a point where Amazi-girl is doing intense stuff at night enough to make even Amber’s body (which is used to her activities) feel a lot of soreness, and she has NO recollection of it.

    That’s not good

  44. BrokenEye, the True False Prophet
    BrokenEye, the True False Prophet
    March 10, 2018 at 12:31 am | #

    A first person pronoun? Impostor! What have you done with the real Faz?

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