Dumbing of Age Book Twelve

Dumbing of Age

A college webcomic by David Willis
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May 12, 2026

Fruits

by David M Willis on November 5, 2019 at 12:01 am
  • 01 - Birthday Pursuit
└ Tags: dorothy, joyce, leslie

Discussion (98) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. Ana Chronistic
    Ana Chronistic
    November 5, 2019 at 12:01 am | #

    I mean, I’d like to think being ten times the mom as a cereal wouldn’t be such a low bar to clear

    think Beckers doesn’t want a(nother) mom tho

    • Emperor Norton II
      Emperor Norton II
      November 5, 2019 at 12:41 am | #

      Not sure she wants a -mom- mom; but she sure as hell wants a Lesbian Mom who will teach her all the things she needs to know now.

      And also be there to tie her tie.

      • Needfuldoer
        Needfuldoer
        November 5, 2019 at 2:07 am | #

        But she felt guilty about freeloading off said Lesbian Mom.

        • Tan
          Tan
          November 5, 2019 at 11:24 am | #

          There is a difference in life between what one wants and what one feels one deserves.

  2. Doctor_Who
    Doctor_Who
    November 5, 2019 at 12:02 am | #

    It’s like if Steven Universe took place in the real world and there was an episode where Steven left Pearl’s to go stay with Amethyst.

    • Danielle
      Danielle
      November 5, 2019 at 12:04 am | #

      well thats unfair

      its more like if pearl left steven to stay with buck dewey

      • AeromechanicalAce
        AeromechanicalAce
        November 5, 2019 at 12:04 am | #

        More Like Marty.

        • DailyBrad
          DailyBrad
          November 5, 2019 at 12:20 am | #

          Okay, Robin’s got problems, but she ain’t fucking Marty.

          She’s more like Kevin: the worst, but not the dirt worst.

          • Liquid Len
            Liquid Len
            November 5, 2019 at 9:54 am | #

            OK, your first line put some weird-ass Back to the Future visuals in my head!

            • DaisyFM
              DaisyFM
              November 5, 2019 at 6:47 pm | #

              It’s more like Amethyst left Pearl to stay with Amethyst.

    • LeslieBean4shizzle
      LeslieBean4shizzle
      November 5, 2019 at 12:08 am | #

      **happy smile**

      Pearl is my favorite.
      Because her fighting style is directly based on Revolutionary Girl Utena.

      • Lieutenant Dan
        Lieutenant Dan
        November 5, 2019 at 6:24 am | #

        Porl is best gem. Porl is stronk in real way.

    • BBCC
      BBCC
      November 5, 2019 at 12:14 am | #

      Hey, Amethyst is a great mom, especially in the later seasons. Just because she’s the fun mom doesn’t mean she’s not good at it.

      Amethyst can cook, she’s learned not to dump her problems on Steven as the kid of the family and is pretty good at taking care of the others in a crisis (like when she was looking after Pearl when she and Garnet were fighting).

      • Doctor_Who
        Doctor_Who
        November 5, 2019 at 12:21 am | #

        Early Amethyst definitely wouldn’t prioritize fruits and vegetables, though.

        • BBCC
          BBCC
          November 5, 2019 at 12:27 am | #

          I mean, Greg and Vidalia would probably remind her of human nutritional requirements. We’ve seen her cook for humans before and she was pretty good at it. She managed to get ketchup INSIDE a french fry for crying out loud! XD Now, what she makes for HERSELF gives me a stomach ache just thinking about it, but eh.

          • Khno
            Khno
            November 5, 2019 at 2:56 am | #

            Ketchup inside fries already gives me stomach ache just thinking about it. Outside of fries it’s only slightly better.

      • DailyBrad
        DailyBrad
        November 5, 2019 at 12:21 am | #

        She also late-series was keen to let Steven be a kid, something the others were sometimes having trouble remembering to do.

        • BBCC
          BBCC
          November 5, 2019 at 12:37 am | #

          There’s a reason Steven said she might be the most mature crystal gem now.

          She was also willing to continue wrestling when she saw how much it meant to Steven, even though she didn’t feel like she needed to anymore.

  3. saltchocolate
    saltchocolate
    November 5, 2019 at 12:03 am | #

    Wooo! Book 10!!

  4. shadowcell
    shadowcell
    November 5, 2019 at 12:03 am | #

    Dumbing of Age Book 10: That Face When the Cartoonist Steals Your Schtick

    • Keulen
      Keulen
      November 5, 2019 at 2:07 am | #

      The alt-text was what I was gonna post.

  5. ValdVin
    ValdVin
    November 5, 2019 at 12:03 am | #

    Sonny the cuckoo bird actually got Cocoa Puffs, right?

    For me, Robin is like the Trix rabbit if the none-too-stable rabbit ever got his hands on the cereal.

    • Stephen Bierce
      Stephen Bierce
      November 5, 2019 at 12:06 am | #

      The tragedy of Sonny is that he’s forever trying to break his bad habit and being enabled away from his good efforts. He fails every time.

      • ValdVin
        ValdVin
        November 5, 2019 at 12:12 am | #

        Are you sure you’re not confusing him with Cookie, the Codependent Cockatoo, spokesbird for Sucrose Stars cereal?

      • Needfuldoer
        Needfuldoer
        November 5, 2019 at 2:13 am | #

        Tony the Tiger drags the Trix rabbit over to an observation window overlooking a padded room. Inside the room, Sonny is having one of his Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs manic episodes.

        “Son, this is the face of addiction. Is that what you want for yourself?”

        • ValdVin
          ValdVin
          November 5, 2019 at 10:31 am | #

          I’ve been watching a few Youtube critiques of ’50s educational films for tweens and teens, and now I can’t help but imagine your scenario as one of them.

      • EvilMidnightLurker
        EvilMidnightLurker
        November 5, 2019 at 2:54 am | #

        That’s not the worst of it.

        The worst part is that he finally gave in and joined the kids as just another pusher. 😢

    • Charlie Spencer
      Charlie Spencer
      November 5, 2019 at 10:20 am | #

      Eddie Murphy had a bit Back In The Day about Lucky Charms and Fruit Loops being the cereals for LGBT, way back before the initials came to be in use.

  6. Stephen Bierce
    Stephen Bierce
    November 5, 2019 at 12:05 am | #

    “You’re NEVER too old for nuts and berries.”–Zonker’s dad in Doonesbury

  7. Skemono
    Skemono
    November 5, 2019 at 12:09 am | #

    CUCKOO!!

  8. Shane Wegner
    Shane Wegner
    November 5, 2019 at 12:16 am | #

    Someday cuckoo birds must fly from the nest!

    I’m not 100% clear on why Leslie felt responsible for Becky. Reminded her of her past self maybe?

    • Cholma
      Cholma
      November 5, 2019 at 12:29 am | #

      Yep. She another young lesbian who had been rejected by her family, who had no one to turn to for guidance/safety. She felt compelled to help.

    • Sam
      Sam
      November 5, 2019 at 1:03 am | #

      The older lesbians adopt the younger lesbians to protect them from predators until they reach maturity. More seriously it’s just that Leslie knows what it is like to have been in Becky’s position and wants to give her the support and care that she didn’t get from anyone herself. She isn’t necessarily responsible for it and she doesn’t have to, but she wants to. She wants to be the support that she personally didn’t have.

      • Roborat
        Roborat
        November 5, 2019 at 2:55 pm | #

        I read your first sentence in Sir David Attenborough’s voice.

    • Emperor Norton II
      Emperor Norton II
      November 5, 2019 at 1:20 am | #

      Let’s first give the word to our resident teacher, Cerberus: http://www.dumbingofage.com/2017/comic/book-7/03-the-thing-i-was-before/resources-3/#comment-1218145

      And in a way, once Leslie took her in, she did indeed become responsible for Becky. Sure, Becky might technically be an adult; but we know for a certainty she was never groomed to actually be self-sufficient; but instead become the god-fearing submissive wife who’d homeschool her husband’s children and keep the house immaculate.

      And Leslie knows this. Even if Becky didn’t tell all the details, Leslie is an intelligent woman who knows what Becky is -not- telling her. And therefore she knows that Becky’s going to need help to acquire all of her goals.

  9. Beef
    Beef
    November 5, 2019 at 12:21 am | #

    Shortpacked: Leslie and Robin’s wedding, Dumbing of Age: Leslie and Robin’s custody battle

    • Needfuldoer
      Needfuldoer
      November 5, 2019 at 2:16 am | #

      If we could upvote comments here, I’d upvote this!

  10. Dracke
    Dracke
    November 5, 2019 at 12:22 am | #

    I hate seeing Leslie and Ropbbing be at odds,…i love Dumbing of Age

    • Dracke
      Dracke
      November 5, 2019 at 12:23 am | #

      I meant Shortstoked

      • Dr. Sharks
        Dr. Sharks
        November 5, 2019 at 9:50 am | #

        Are you having a stroke? Please be well.

        • Jess
          Jess
          November 5, 2019 at 6:49 pm | #

          I think they were battling the great beast known as autocorrect? Idk.

    • Dracke
      Dracke
      November 5, 2019 at 12:23 am | #

      Shortpacked!

  11. Mr. Random
    Mr. Random
    November 5, 2019 at 12:25 am | #

    I think your legal department might have issues with that title.

    • JBento
      JBento
      November 5, 2019 at 7:49 am | #

      “In retrospect, making the toddlers my legal and HR departments was not the wisest decision I could have made.” – David “Damn You” Willis, A Memoir

  12. Charles Phipps
    Charles Phipps
    November 5, 2019 at 12:35 am | #

    Robin has the thing that makes the greatest American parent: money.

    • Charles Phipps
      Charles Phipps
      November 5, 2019 at 12:36 am | #

      And yes, I feel the need to clarify this is sarcasm.

  13. Miri
    Miri
    November 5, 2019 at 12:35 am | #

    Leslie… She was sleeping on your sofa while you were pretending you weren’t banging your inappropriate girlfriend. You offered her the sofa whilst single… She felt that she was imposing and giving you nothing back in return – it didn’t occur to her that you were mothering the homeless lost child you once were yourself/paying it forward. She felt like a moocher. A place to live and tuition in exchange for her doing a job? That feels like something she can fairly grab hold of (questionable ethics of said job aside). She feels like she has something to offer her girlfriend now…

    You didn’t fail her. She’s a young adult who wants to be independent.

    Also, she grew up under the roof of a tyrant; chances are she was told things along the lines of “while you live under my roof you follow my rules; if you can’t do that, you can get out” as an adolescent. A roof she’s earned the right to live under on her own merits as an adult feels a lot more reliable than one provided to her “because it’s the right thing to do” – how many things did Toedad pay lip service to as “the right thing to do”? Humility, respectfulness, obedience to the laws set by a higher power etc – when his understanding of them was that these things are for other people because he’s a “good man” and therefore “deserves his dues”?

    Poor kiddo almost definitely has some trust issues when it comes to “real adults” and you’re a teacher so you count.

    • vlademir1
      vlademir1
      November 5, 2019 at 1:49 am | #

      Yeah. That first paragraph lines up quite well with things I know from several people I’ve known who were at some point in life homeless or destitute. Most would rather have at least the illusion of doing work for pay than just being given stuff.

    • ischemgeek
      ischemgeek
      November 5, 2019 at 4:40 am | #

      Agreed with all this.

      Would also add that with the style of conservative Becky was brought up by, no charity is ever without strings attached – Becky preferred dealing with Robin because Robin is transparent about the strings attached to her charity.

      Leslie OTOH genuinely wanted to give actual charity – as in to help Becky just to help Becky. Becky couldn’t deal because she was always waiting for the other shoe to drop.

      • thejeff
        thejeff
        November 5, 2019 at 6:50 am | #

        OTOH, Robin.

        The other shoe will drop.

        • JBento
          JBento
          November 5, 2019 at 7:51 am | #

          And it’s gonna be a hobnailed, steel-toed boot.

  14. Bagge
    Bagge
    November 5, 2019 at 12:37 am | #

    Leslie IS a great Beckymom.

    …but I must say, Dotty momming on Leslie makes her the mommier mom.

    Dorothy is the alpha mom.

    • ValdVin
      ValdVin
      November 5, 2019 at 1:04 am | #

      Make that two alpha moms.

      http://www.dumbingofage.com/2015/comic/book-5/03-the-butterflies-fly-away/confidentially/

      • Bagge
        Bagge
        November 5, 2019 at 1:10 am | #

        Heh! Great callback!

        • ValdVin
          ValdVin
          November 5, 2019 at 10:28 am | #

          Let’s face it, at this exact point in the timeline Dott-o and Leslie are the best two parental figures on campus.

          • ValdVin
            ValdVin
            November 5, 2019 at 10:29 am | #

            …make that “in Bloomington”.

          • Bagge
            Bagge
            November 5, 2019 at 2:14 pm | #

            True…. but I do have a soft spot for Hank.

            http://www.dumbingofage.com/2016/comic/book-6/04-it-all-returns/deserves/

            • ValdVin
              ValdVin
              November 5, 2019 at 11:33 pm | #

              Of course, Hank, and from what we know, Dorothy’s parents too.

              (I’d love an edit function. I meant substitute parent types, not real parents.)

      • drs
        drs
        November 5, 2019 at 1:16 am | #

        Man, I love later drunk Dorothy too. “I guess that’s weird”, not committing to “don’t hit on Dina” as much as the others, and “Huzzah!” when Dina stands up for herself.

    • BenRG
      BenRG
      November 5, 2019 at 4:29 am | #

      For what it’s worth, I think that Becky needs to be Robin’s mother. Dorothy should point out that to Leslie and add that this makes Robin deSanto her spiritual granddaughter.

      • drs
        drs
        November 5, 2019 at 7:18 am | #

        *Leslie head explode*

        Hmm, Dorothy -> Leslie -> Becky -> Robin

        • JBento
          JBento
          November 5, 2019 at 7:52 am | #

          Motherioshka?

      • Bagge
        Bagge
        November 5, 2019 at 7:27 am | #

        Nah, they are sisters 🙂

        http://www.dumbingofage.com/2017/comic/book-7/03-the-thing-i-was-before/startreks/

  15. BBCC
    BBCC
    November 5, 2019 at 12:39 am | #

    Oh, Leslie. You absolutely were, because unlike Robin you’re not totally contemptuous.

    • CJ
      CJ
      November 5, 2019 at 7:25 am | #

      Unlike Robin, you offered to help because it was the right thing to do.
      I totally get that Becky doesn’t want (to trust in) charity and feels safer with her deal with Robin. I think it’s one of those things were your traumatized brain tells you bullshit about what’s safe and what isn’t.

      • thejeff
        thejeff
        November 5, 2019 at 11:24 am | #

        To be fair and practical, the deal with Robin also gets her tuition, which Leslie wasn’t in a position to offer.

  16. JessWitt
    JessWitt
    November 5, 2019 at 12:50 am | #

    Yep I know Leslie is still dating someone else but I can’t imagine she and Robin will ever be together in this universe.

    • Josh Spicer
      Josh Spicer
      November 5, 2019 at 1:09 am | #

      The same can be said of Joyce and Willis.

      • Josh Spicer
        Josh Spicer
        November 5, 2019 at 1:10 am | #

        Walky, what in the fuck is wrong with me?

        • Clif
          Clif
          November 5, 2019 at 1:42 am | #

          Do the mature thing.

          Blame it on spell check.

          • Emperor Norton II
            Emperor Norton II
            November 5, 2019 at 2:55 am | #

            Or blame Bagge.

            Because Bagge -would- ship Joyce and Willis.

            • Bagge
              Bagge
              November 5, 2019 at 7:28 am | #

              Nah, I have no shame about gushing about fictional people, but I try to leave real people out of it.

              • Emperor Norton II
                Emperor Norton II
                November 5, 2019 at 11:01 pm | #

                Wait, Willis is real?

    • BenRG
      BenRG
      November 5, 2019 at 4:27 am | #

      Willis has stated that none of the Walkyverse ships will be the end state in Dumbing of Age. So, no Mike x Amber, no Walky x Joyce, no Sal x Jason and so on.

      If anything, I’ve found it interesting how he’s had those ships referenced by having the principals not get on with each other in the slightest. The point he’s making, of course (as Walkyverse Joyce pointed out in the DoA teaser strip) without the very special circumstances of the Walkyverse, none of the relationships we saw in that saga could ever hope to work.

      • ValdVin
        ValdVin
        November 5, 2019 at 10:26 am | #

        “Willis has stated that none of the Walkyverse ships will be the end state in Dumbing of Age.”

        Thanx, I did not know. This is a useful bit of information so I can stop shipping Walkyverse pairs here.

      • Regalli
        Regalli
        November 5, 2019 at 10:51 am | #

        There does seem to be an exception for Billie/Ruth, but then
        1. They weren’t endgame due to the whole Ruth’s death thing, and
        2. As a pairing it wasn’t explored very deeply or for very long in the Walkyverse, only coming up in Roomies! Redux.

        • thejeff
          thejeff
          November 5, 2019 at 11:28 am | #

          There was a big caveat of “Unless I can do something new and interesting with them.”

          I think it was more of a “Don’t expect the same pairs” than a flat ban on them.

          • David M Willis
            David M Willis
            November 5, 2019 at 1:41 pm | #

            a lot of my Big Rules had caveats, btw

    • Kim
      Kim
      November 5, 2019 at 9:28 am | #

      Don’t say that! My heart can’t take it! T-T
      Robin and Leslie are too beautiful together </3

  17. Lacuna
    Lacuna
    November 5, 2019 at 12:50 am | #

    For a minute I got my cereal mascots confused and I thought she was talking about Toucan Sam.

    And I thought that was a REALLY unfair comparison, because Toucan Sam was a decent father figure to his three nephews.

    • Newllend(henryvolt)
      Newllend(henryvolt)
      November 5, 2019 at 1:18 am | #

      Thinking about it, is Sam the cereal mascot equivalent of Donald Duck and his nephews?

      • He Who Abides
        He Who Abides
        November 5, 2019 at 10:03 pm | #

        All of a sudden, I’m picturing Ebenezer MacSam.

        And it. Is. BEAUTIFUL.

  18. Bagge
    Bagge
    November 5, 2019 at 1:31 am | #

    Narrator: Becky did not eat enough fruit and vegetables.

  19. Keulen
    Keulen
    November 5, 2019 at 2:06 am | #

    I didn’t know the cuckoo bird actually had a name until now.

  20. Eve
    Eve
    November 5, 2019 at 3:15 am | #

    I thought this was just calling Robin a mix of sonic the hedgehog and a hyperactive bird. Apparently I was wrong and that’s a real mascots name.

  21. BenRG
    BenRG
    November 5, 2019 at 4:23 am | #

    This is going to be an ugly divorce and child custody battle, isn’t it? :-p

  22. TheFlamingonator
    TheFlamingonator
    November 5, 2019 at 6:17 am | #

    wait the Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs bird is named Sonny? Not Cuckoo?

    I didn’t grow up with the cereal so I just assumed that Cuckoo was supposed to be the name of the bird and the synonym for “crazy”

    • Clif
      Clif
      November 5, 2019 at 8:51 am | #

      Since we’re really talking about Ŕobin and not a cereal mascot, it doesn’t actually matter. Robin is a “synonym” for crazy on her own.

  23. GutterChick
    GutterChick
    November 5, 2019 at 6:50 am | #

    How old is Leslie, I wonder? 30s?

    • Delicious Taffy
      Delicious Taffy
      November 5, 2019 at 2:45 pm | #

      260, but due to the cryo, she’s not aged for a while.

      • Slartibeast Button, BIA
        Slartibeast Button, BIA
        November 5, 2019 at 7:05 pm | #

        She is Highlander Immortal, under the mistaken impression that a state university counts as Holy Ground.

  24. Pocky
    Pocky
    November 5, 2019 at 7:17 am | #

    she’s a pretty good mom

  25. Rabisch
    Rabisch
    November 5, 2019 at 7:44 am | #

    Leslie should meet Robin and discuss with her how to raise Becky.

    • Deanatay
      Deanatay
      November 5, 2019 at 7:59 am | #

      Go the whole ‘custody agreement’ route, decide who gets her what days? Becky has enough rules in her life!

  26. Alan In DC
    Alan In DC
    November 5, 2019 at 6:14 pm | #

    Any minute now, expect that Cease & Desist letter to arrive from General Mills.

  27. Elsendor
    Elsendor
    November 5, 2019 at 9:12 pm | #

    leslie give yourself more credit, ten times zero is still zero, you gotta try adding in this situation

  28. abysswatcher1993
    abysswatcher1993
    November 5, 2019 at 10:04 pm | #

    Leslie, you were a good team mom. The problem is that Becky feels she doesn’t want to be a burden to other people, and she sucks at communicating her feelings thanks to her abusive dad.

  29. Robert Q
    Robert Q
    December 2, 2019 at 7:19 pm | #

    I missed Leslie Bean!

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