Discussion (155) ¬
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Sharon @sharonk.bsky.social ⋅ 4h
Rabbi Danya Ruttenberg @theradr.bsky.social ⋅ 9d
♥️ 
Tea Berry-Blue @teaberryblue.net ⋅ 2d
Truthout @truthout.org ⋅ 2d
Jay Edidin @edidin.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
Krispy @feathernotes.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
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CLEARLY he’s Angel Food Cake
with strawberries
and
a doofy hatwhipped creamalso, DANG two hours?? I break after like five minutes
SAME, though. :/
Twenty minutes for me.
Varies in my case, depending on degree and type of social interaction, available buffers, and how much warning and time to brace myself I had beforehand.
Extreme unexpected emergency social stress can also mean all bets are off. The holiday meeting of a crafting society my mom and I are members of took a… dramatic turn when a member of the executive used her speech to accuse the membership of not appreciating all the hard work she did and burst into tears. Then afterwards everyone started the christmas party like nothing happened? My social threshold IMMEDIATELY zeroed out faster than I’d actually thought possible and triggered a more complete than usual withdrawal.
Mom: “Excuse me, has anyone seen my daughter? I think she got a little overwhelmed and needed a time out.”
Me: “… A LITTLE BIT YES.”
Mom: “… Where are you?”
Me: “SOMEWHERE NORMAL DOING SOMETHING WELL ADJUSTED AND DEFINITELY NOT HIDING UNDER A TABLE IN THE HALLWAY.”
Mom: “Of course. Let me know if you want me to bring you a cupcake.”
Me: “… YES PLEASE.”
This.
Keep in mind, she must’ve worked to train that up so she’d be able to be outdoors and interacting with people for superhero reasons.
In keeping with the “good egg” theme, wouldn’t he be more of a custard or a meringue?
No, wait — he’s definitely a flan. Well, maybe a quiche. But I’m going with flan.
I thought the bisexual desert was supposed to be lemon bars. Not that I’m particularly into lemon bars. But the only bi stereotypes I really conform to are not sitting in chairs properly and cuffing all my clothes.
Wait, not sitting in chairs properly? Tell me more…
Examples include sitting perched like a bird, having one leg propped under you and one leg up, feet tucked under in contexts too formal for sitting so casual, chair at weird angle in relation to desk, etc. It’s the latest bi meme: https://www.pinknews.co.uk/2018/11/27/bisexual-sitting-chairs-meme/
Also, I totally forgot about finger guns. I do those sometimes as well.
That’s been a gay meme in general (people were making that joke about the cast of queer eye sitting in an interview) and one iake sure I adhere to
Whenever my LGBT friends sit anywhere in the above mentioned way I dramatically gasp and yell “BEHOLD, THE GAY AGENDA!”
I have weirdly picked up literally every gay secondary behavior such as poor seating behaviors, posturing, and awkward hand signs and now I have set off multiple gaydars so I guess the jokes on me for being the only straight guy in the group.
Hm…of all the things I suspected that would be linked to, this is not one of them. >.> That would explain the amount of lesbian attention I get.
I BAKE a tasty lemon bar. What does that make me?
I thought the bisexual desert was a big sandy place that’s attracted to both forests and oceans.
Yes, but that’s nothing special. They’re not called heteromes for a reason.
Anyway, here’s Wonderbread.
He looks delicious
The ukulele strings would get caught in your teeth, and the hat is just empty calories.
OMG it even has eyes and a mouth…thats just creepy!
oh right, the crippling social anxiety
OMG she is so me.
Two hours of socially friendly is about my limit too.
Okay, if I’m with my wife or my family. Alone, much less.
Same here. No party should take longer than that.
People are great… in small doses.
It’s taken a lot of practice, but now I can be “on” for the workday as long as I take regular breaks and retreat to my solitary nerd cave after hours.
*plays ELO’s “Telephone Line” on the P.A. speakers*
It me.
Are kids still saying that?
Less, and they’ve grown some, and it’s partially ironic.
I still say this.
I think they say “mood.” or “big mood” but i cant keep up anymore
and im still part of the “kids” to some aspect
Sometimes they say “same hat.”
And I bet they don’t even -own- that helmet!
From personal experience as an introvert myself, it’s a muscle like any other. Socialize, look out for queues, be prepared to stumble, find supportive people, and you’ll turn out alright.
Yeah, that makes sense. For me, it feels like a battery I have to recharge.
Queues or cues?
Bloody English!
A queue is a line of people. Cue is meat and barbecue sauce.
I’m pretty sure you’re playing snooker wrong if you’re using sauce like that…
Yup. Getting thrown headfirst into the corporate world did wonders for my social anxiety. (The Internet sure helped a lot too. Thanks, phpbb.) I was almost as bad as Amber up through college, and to be honest I still hate being the center of attention, but a lot of work and practice built up confidence.
Fair enough
No, Amber, don’t resign yourself to always being broken. Self-fulfilling etc.
But getting fixed is for pets.
I got fixed and I’m much calmer.
Awww, it’s sweet they both have such a high opinion of Danny. I just wish Amber had a higher opinion of herself.
And yeah, Sal feels guilty Amber (Actually AG but Sal doesn’t know the difference) and Danny broke up. She might feel bad about Amber and Walky too but there’s probably more residual weirdness about Amber and Walky dating. I know they said they forgive each other and want to move on, but there’s still time for the brain to match that desire (Sal had to remind herself of that earlier when she was talking to Joyce).
I will agree that Danny deserved better than he was getting at the end, but I think Amber is giving herself too little credit, as per usual. If they did get back together, I would want her to keep a close eye on how she treats him, the kind of shit Mike was calling her out on, etc.
full disclosure, I’m from an emotionally and physically abusive childhood, so maybe I am being overly sensitive on some of those past interactions, but just… it really, really rubs me the wrong way when couples tear each other down with name-calling and shouting. Like, raised voices happen, but when you’re getting rancorous, I don’t think, “This is where it’s come to”, I think about what can happen next when it keeps escalating, and that’s a really terrifying place to go to, even if it doesn’t come to blows.
In either case, I do hope Amber and Danny can talk things out, wherever that leads them. It could be a very healing experience for both of them, but particularly for Amber. It’s good to be accountable, but you also need to realize that mistakes aren’t Game Over. You try again.
Amber herself called herself out on it long before Mike did and it was part of where her self-loathing in the relationship came from. Danny brushed it off, but both AG and Amber knew it was wrong and not okay to do. Amber’s inherent reaction though is to destroy herself for making an error which is obviously not helpful – she isn’t evil for getting annoyed that Danny kept doing something she asked him not to even if she handled it poorly. Even good people sometimes do the wrong thing.
You’re not oversensitive for finding it uncomfortable when couples raise voices, start shouting and tearing at each other with name-calling though. It shows poor communication and communication can make or break relationships. Name-calling doesn’t solve anything and just hurts each other as well and shouldn’t be part of a discussion.
That’s probably a new record for her. Good Job Amber!
That’s Amber, shining example to all of us introverts.
Best way I think I can decsribe Danny in a very truthful manner would be that he’s a Hapless well nicely straight laced goodegg with endearing Charm to him. I think any girl would be happy to have him just as long as they don’t mind a bit of bad luck every now and again since he’s always finding some way of getting himself in a mess…. then again he’s been doing better lately.
One of his qualities is a big faith in others, which sometimes bites him in the ass, and very little faith in himself. (Though, he’s getting better on that.)
Warning: Emotional Shutdown Imminent! Warning! Warning!
*sound of pneumatics powering down*
“Danger, Sal Walkerton! Danger! Danger!”
*Red alert klaxon*
*Alert tone* Warning. Social anxiety containment energy field depleted. Emotional shutdown imminent.
*Red alert klaxon continues*
Even though Ambers last two relationships went belly up because of Sal related things I think Sal’s being a bit to hard on herself. Out everything that’s happened between these two I would say whatever happened in Amber’s love life was definitely not Sals fault. I mean as much as I desperately want Amber to be with someone good for her I think it’s going to be hard to allow someone to love her if she can’t even love herself.
I don’t think Sal is being too hard on herself. She knows Amber had issues with her and it caused the relationship to strain. She didn’t do anything on purpose and she knows it.
She didn’t even have the phone with her, did she? It just kind of appeared there.
I have a theory that she learned how to make it appear out of thin air for just these situations.
Contrary to popular belief, some women’s pants do in fact have pockets
yea but theyre about as rare as white T-shirts that aren’t see-through
It’s the sticking the phone in the tight-but-stretchy back pocket that baffles me. When people complain about their smartphones being broken (physically, not electronically), what surprises me is that it doesn’t happen more often.
Especially if you’re doing 2 hours of roller derby practice.
alt text: i like how willis likes 1 (One) Anime
Evangelion, the anime that keeps on giving.
glad to have willis not make sal blush while saying danny’s a cupcake. real easy to have characters express fondness of each other and making it seem “shippy” or whatever, so its good to just go this dude’s sweet i like hanging out with him and i hope he finds happiness and that being it.
My point from yesterday still stands, this rapport is weird and i don’t feel like its earned.
You can break a lot of ice while you’re kicking each other’s ass, sometimes.
Joke-ish answer out of the way, I think it’s a lot of good will because both of them have a weight off of their shoulders, along with knowing they could have been in deep shit but skated, no pun intended.
Plus, you have Sal being happy Marcie’s giving her the time of day again, a lot of residual guilt the two had, and I think both of them just really wanting to make it work. They’ll probably snap at each other again eventually, but for now, they’ve got stuff going in their favor.
Yeah, they’re going on ‘I want to do this’ momentum and happiness right now. I suspect it’ll eventually be slightly more complicated – especially once AG notices she’s suddenly down one ‘sidekick’.
And yeah, they’re taking shots at each other. Nicer ones than they might have if they hadn’t agreed to try to move on, but still poking.
Yeah, I’m completely checked out of this arc at this point.
I’m with Amber. I have at most two hours of social interaction in group settings before I start shutting down. (Two hours is maybe generous.)
I have twenty minutes. Visitors should go away after half an hour. They should not stay for two weeks.
If I am not with friends I can talk to about things I like, then I start getting bored and angsty and want to read something in AO3 on my phone.
I support the Danny / Sal Broship.
It is by will alone I se my mind in motion
People that keep saying “he desserves better blablabla”. Well that’s up for him to decide.
As a former vanilla whitebread, no, no they don’t want a girl like that. It’s never Betty, always Veronica.
You’d think it’d be easier for Archie to make his mind up then.
Surprisingly, for like 90% of the series run it’s usually him dating Veronica.
It’s just readers generally liked Betty more.
Depends what girl the writers prefer. A lot of more Betty stories have Archie liking Veronica for the glitz and glamour and Veronica being (generally) nice and cool, but Betty having more of a connection. Meanwhile, Veronica stories tend to have him only hanging around Betty when Veronica isn’t around.
If there’s any consistency to how the Archie/Betty/Veronica relationship is handled, it’s that Archie sees Betty as a friend first, and is occasionally reminded (sometimes by Betty) she’s a girl-person too. Veronica is always a girl/potential gf first, last and always in Archie’s view. And her air of unattainability helps too/doesn’t help either.
Bold of you to assume there’s consistency.
As much as comics over 70 years old can be.
70 years and a zillion writers. Like I said, the writer is usually a better indicator on Archie’s feelings than any sort of consistency. There’s plenty where he prefers Veronica and also plenty where he prefers Betty. And this is not something that will ever get sorted out in the story.
It also comes with the side effect of making Archie look like an indecisive scoundrel, but that’s also been brought up more and more recently.
Indecisive? They’ve all spent 70 years in high school–wait til they have to pick a college manor.
Good god, that will be a sight to behold.
That’s why I said: “If there’s any consistency.”
I know, I just can’t resist taking shots at Archie. I know there are a few darker series, but Archie in general is just such a light hearted, fun series I can’t help myself.
Okay, no.
I’ve never been on that kind of pedestal, but I do immediately see that it’s a very lonely pedestal, as nobody lives up to what you two are requiring for being with him.
Don’t do that to people. If you feel you’re not good for a relationship, or this particular relationship isn’t going to be good for the both of you, be honest on that. But, don’t put them on a pedestal like that. That’s a shitty thing to do to a person.
I don’t think they are putting him up on a strict pedestal so much as just going ‘Danny’s pure, he deserves someone pure like him’ as more of a passive commentary. Amber is partly saying it out of self-loathing naturally but I don’t think either would like, enforce it on anyone else.
ZORRRRRP
*click*
distractions can be great.sometimes you just need to pull away from reality.
Oh no….they’re gonna try to get him with Joyce, aren’t they?
Oh my god, there is so much collateral damage in that scenario.
That’d be such a bad idea, and now I really want it to happen.
Oh I really hope not.
It would never happen. Danny has met Joyce a few times and all that registers is the hat.
Well, Joyce did crush on/obeseness over/stalk Danny in Roomies! Maybe Willis wants to explore whether they would have worked out if not for the whole ‘aliens, mind-wipe and Walky as a superhero’ thing.
Joyce did many things to get Danny’s attention in the Walkyverse, but I don’t think she ever went obese in any of those attempts.
Joyce isn’t pure, she’s said heck.
You know, they’ve already sort of planted the seed of that way back in one of the earliest comics.
Dorothy had just broken up with Danny. Joe suggested finding Danny some sort of “romantically co-dependent doofus to latch on to”. Scene switches to Joyce writing up all the ways she could write her name if she were married… “Mrs. X… Mrs. Joyce X… Mrs. Joyce Brown X”.
http://www.dumbingofage.com/2010/comic/book-1/02-uphill-from-here/codependent/
I sort of got that impression from this, too. I actually kind of support it, since I like seeing the Walkyverse relationships through the Dumbing of Age lens, and not only do I just think that Danny and Joyce would be interesting together, I’m hoping that might make Joe jealous. I really dig Joece (Joeyce?).
Amber, only two such people exist, and they’re already in a relationship.
Dina and Becky?
But Lucy’s not dating anyone
“He deserves someone pure”….I get maybe she’s exaggerating for the sake of emphasizing how broken she says she is, but I still have to scoff at the idea of a person being perceived as innocent, pure, or perfect when it’s more reasonable that no particular person can be any of those things especially innocent. Sure maybe someone can be just a little Innocent but not completely, the way I see it minute you’re introduced to this toxic environment you call life your tarnished forever
That seems a little crab-buckety.
I had a deeper monologue planned with more details but I thought Maybe I would just sum up my point with that last sentence.
Yeah. Humans are just human. Holding out for someone who is “pure” is just setting impossible standards. Everyone has baggage, doubts, flaws.
And thats the beauty of it.
Not to mention the idea the amount of weight our society puts on purity and innocence as like desirable traits is weird and uncomfortable especially in regards to women.
I raise you a Lucy and leave it there.
Okay, we’ve been having a lot of fun with panel 3, and panel 4 has a lot of resonance for many of us, but:
The core of this strip — the core of Amber’s story — is the bottom of panel 2. Amber sees herself as irredeemably and permanently broken.
Props to Amber for knowing her limits that well. I usually notice that times up after its happened.
Shit son I’m pretty sure I’m neurotypical, 2 hours of new activity new people active emotional reasoning activity with old scars TWO HOURS sheeeet
In which Sal realises just what a huge blow to healthy human social interaction is modern communications technology!
Not really. Amber needed to withdraw. She was going to whether she had a phone or not.
In which sal realizes that modern communications technology provides a nice escape for people with anxiety disorders, as they now have a socially acceptable way to withdraw when they feel overwhelmed rather than needing to look for an escape. Some other people might realize that it’s not causing any actual blow to healthy interaction, as most of the time it’s used to interact with people in other countries, or who just aren’t present. Hopefully they’ll also realize that face to face interaction with people who happen to be around you is no more valuable than interaction with friends through a phone
Thanks for coming to my TED talk
Which doesn’t mean there aren’t other more subtle consequences. I’m not actually sold on the idea that face-to-face interaction is no more valuable.
Might not be at any particular moment, but overall it’s still a big deal. And a lot of phone use is pretty shallow interaction, not necessarily with actual friends (even online ones.)
And an actual ted talk: https://www.ted.com/talks/john_mcwhorter_txtng_is_killing_language_jk/up-next?language=en
According to “think pieces” throughout the centuries, _______ has been responsible for “a huge blow to healthy human social interaction”
– Newspapers
– TV
– Penny Novels
– Chess
– Regular Phones
– Pool
– Probably the first cave paintings
Calling the new thing a social communication plague has been the norm for thousands of years.
Cave ruined forever now!
Don’t forget “the second TV”, which I remember living before, when I was a kid.
(/ onion on my belt)
The ancient Greeks thought writing would rot the minds of their children.
Your point stands – it’s nothing new. It’s actually a constant. Technology changes the way we interact, and the changes are continuing, even accelerating. Old people like me tend to think that “kids today” are taking society to Hell in a handbasket. But it’s just changing. It is easy to see change as detrimental but it’s usually not.
If I don’t have my phone, I whip out a book. If I don’t have a book, I find another way to ignore people. I’ll read the ingredients of one of those little packets of jelly if I don’t feel like talking. Technology has nothing to do with it.
“Going non-verbal now.”
I might be starting to ship this comic’s versions of Sal and Danny now.
Okay but I seriously love how cheerful and light-hearted Sal has been these days. It’s like someone rolled a giant boulder off the top of her shoulder.
And don’t worry Amber, start small and slowly go forward, slow and steady wins the race.
Oh phew. I thought she was gonna Amazify herself.
Nah, she’s trying to put some distance between her and Amazi-Girl at the moment, which is why she made sure to not wear her Amazi-Skates for this.
Of course, of course. I’m not keeping track of the plot intricacies so these things just slip by.
Actually, I would have liked that because I think that the AG persona has some relevant knowledge and opinions in this matter.
Amber: Can’t talk. Killing spiders.
Danny: GREAT, THERE’S STILL A BUG RIGHT HERE.
oh
“This Amber has reached their social quota for the day, please return in 24 hours. Thank you for your service.”
My point about Danny and Lucy dating comes back, stronger that ever
I see you Sal. I see you.
So it’s called “emotionally shutting down,” is it? I always thought it was: “OK, world, you’re not as interesting as what’s in this book/little electronic box.”
I think it’s a mix of both. It’s like saying “I like you, I greatly enjoy our company, but I enjoy us best in silence and at a non-social distance at great lengths at a time because I feel awkward in social situations. Yes, even private ones, so I tend to fall back on old habits.”
If you find the present company boring, you don’t do what Amber did and politely say something about it. You’d just grab your nearest distraction and let that take you attention without warning.
Sometimes it can be.
In this case, it’s an introvert who’s been exerting great effort for hours to be social and interactive and now needs a break from that and is using the phone to do so, after explaining what she’s doing.
Admittedly for me part is that I am hyperexcitability and mildly autistic but for me it was/is less “not as interesting” and more “it’s Too Much” and I need something to block it out. Because hyperextend, reading helps.
Hyperlexic not hyperexcitability fuck you very much autocorrect.
Amber is relatable here. Introversion generally have a smaller social energy gas tank than extroverts so when we hit our limit we need to hermit a bit to refuel.
My habit is volunteering for duties everyone else at work hates because tedious and using that to get my refuel time but yeah.
Extroverts don’t get I at all but there are times when I get home that I am so socially drained I don’t speak at all for two or three hours. Thankfully my partner gets it but yeah.
I heard a youtuber once describe it as “Extroverts gain mana from socializing, introverts lose mana. When you are making inqonsequential small talk at me, you are *draining my mana*.”
It’s not how I describe it, but I liked that way of phrasing it.
I, too, sometimes needs hours to recharge after work before I can speak again. I’m also glad my partner gets it. I feel you.
My job involves me listening to audio recordings of people and transcribing what they say. It’s only SLIGHTLY less draining than actual people.
The current best times of my week are the two and a half hours that I spend waiting for a train in the winter at night, because the station is otherwise empty.
Good lord, you have to wait 2.5 hours for a train? Everyday?
No, once a week.
Maybe I’m reading too much into this, but Sal seems very happy to engage in classical girl talk. Despite all her protests to the contrary, I think there might have been cases when one friend was not enough.
Or she just has spent too much time together with Joyce.
Sal’s had other friends besides Marcie. Her problem is when she didn’t meet their expectations, they ditched her. Marcie’s the only one who’s cared about her for her and not out of some image of what Sal is that Sal doesn’t actually fit in reality: http://www.dumbingofage.com/2016/comic/book-6/03-when-god-closes-the-door/pissybaby/
Also, apparently at least some history of picking ‘the worst damn people’ besides Marcie.
Citation of second part:http://www.dumbingofage.com/2015/comic/book-5/03-the-butterflies-fly-away/erase/
Hmmm… is this foreshadowing for Danny to be getting with Joyce at some point? Someone “good and pure”?
You know, when I made my friend start reading this comic, she started shipping Danny and Joyce very earlier on. There can be hints of what looks like foreshadowing for the pairing, looking back, but then it really swerved on you. Anyway, I really doubt Danny and Joyce would happen now, but it’d be interesting in that “foreshadowing” aspect if they did.
When Willis started foreshadowing Amber and Walky, it was when both were dating other people with little sign of that changing (see: Walking with Dina, Amber saying ‘Walky’s cute but not worth losing Danny over’ was pointed to by Willis as an example of early crumb dropping).
Self-awareness! Self-awareness is good! Now to work on that warped normality filter and the Goddamn Tapes from your dad that you still have playing in your head.
Classic Introvert
is danny really that vanilla tho
oh mood