A witch accidentally marries a monster, and now she and her familiar has to navigate life around her monstrous husband and her even more terrifying in-laws.
All Known Alternatives
Karolina 'Kajotko' Jankiewicz
Akane has only one way to get back home: collect the 42 keys to parallel worlds. Eri and Ben are just trying to get through the summer before university. When a magical key turns up in an old spare set, all three are forced to change their plans and fast.
Cyanide & Happiness
Explosm
Satire, dark humor and surreal humor.
Dumbing of Age
David M Willis
Joyce has been homeschooled her entire life until now, when she's suddenly a freshman in college! Things don't go well.
Guilded Age
T Campbell, John Waltrip, Florence Machina
Welcome to the saga of the working-class adventurer! Enjoy the complete story with new annotations daily!
BOOKMARK Click "Tag Page" to bookmark a page. When you return to the site, click "Goto Tag" to continue where you left off.
BUFFER WATCH
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These strips go up at midnight in my timezone. It’s a week night and I have work in the morning.
I do NOT need to be up at three with thirty tabs open, trying to find an exact quote from an episode of The Golden Girls I vaguely remember because I want to add an example to a maddeningly specific trope.
I think you can put up to two links in a single comment and it posts right away, but you’ll get caught in the moderation queue if you include three or more.
He’s a stuffy dweeb with a big mouth and no sense to help him keep that mouth shut. And his dick looks funny, can’t trust a guy with a funny-lookin’ wiener. Who knows what sort of European devilry and secrets he’s hiding in there?
I went to grad school in Kentucky for reasons. Canada is too far for the “girlfriend in Canada” line but they have a local equivalent, “girlfriend in Ohio.”
Which is all fine except for the part where I actually did have a girlfriend in Ohio, and I don’t think anyone, not one single person, ever believed me about that.
Yoto, you can’t casually drop the fact that you’re the first person brave enough to call Carol a milf and then not follow up, I literally respect you more than the armed forces.
You know what? You’re right, she’s got a horrible…everything, but the moms of the cast deserve the yotomoe treatment too and she’s clearly the source of a lot of the aforementioned joyce genes
Yotomoe I would lay my body down on barbed wire at D-Day so you could crawl over safely.
I’m honestly disappointed we didn’t get to see more of Stacy getting to be a cougar on the prowl especially because IMO she’s the only one of the moms to show up in one of the slipshines, right? But….Carol IS single now, i’m just waiting for her to become one of those wanna-be conservative outrage merchants online who posts long rants in their car about how the liberals ruined her marriage but she’s only popular because of the Brown family genetics. I’m kind of horrified but delighted at the idea of Carol having a post-divorce midlife crisis and becoming a way less modest cougar.
Hasn’t Asher made a couple of appreciative comments about Walky’s appearance lately? Who knows, maybe he’d be down.
As for Jason, I think it’s pretty clear he’s going to do whatever Ruth tells him to. Ruth may have misinterpreted the “and Subs” on the sign outside, but she still found what she was looking for.
Interesting that Jennifer decided to come back to check up on Joyce the same day
Gives her a chance to learn that it’s not the birth control she was unnerved about after her appointment (if Joyce is awake and decides to share about the referral with Jennifer)
Her yelling is just an indication of how much she’s moved on. Much like the fact Becky and Dina had sex, the louder you shout something the more true it is. This has been established.
Once you’ve gotten to the point where the phrase “I’m not being defensive” needs to be pulled out, there are 3 options: Everyone Laughs, Roll Credits; Slug it out and let the victor be Correct; Sloppy makeouts on the Starbucks table and let the victor be Correct.
Now, I’m picturing slugs making out in the Starbucks in Pike Place Market (I’m guessing slugs are in places other than Washington, but that’s the only place I’ve personally seen them).
It’s been long enough to where I remember someone (Joyce? I forget) being weird about her hooking up with a dude despite Ruth being pretty clear about being bi. In fact, I thiiiink Jennifer was suggested to be her first girl she’s been with.
In any case, I think it’s been like a week-ish maybe, but the time table in this comic can be a little tough sometimes.
A reminder that everything Ruth’s said is just as awkwardly said by someone who actually is largely over an ex as it is someone who is in no way, shape or form over an ex.
We’re fucking awkward people, folks, grab a pint and groan.
Thank you. I need all the positive vibes I can get. I’ve got a job application due in 2 hours. I know I would rock the house with this job and I’m overqualified and it’s even a pay cut (comparatively speaking) but it would get me out of a job where I feel afraid for my safety. And my AuDHD brain is f-ing terrified to put all my skill on 4 pages and press “send”.
So thank you for the Dragon Ball Z energy. It’s helping already.
(Oh and by the way, I’d advise not to disclose of Autism or ADHD to an employer unless you need to, it could lead to pay cuts and other not so pleasant surprises, just a little heads up )
I also have the brain worms which make me think very little of myself, and then I go to an interview and they finish up by begging me not to accept another offer until they get back to me; later that day I wrote my summary life story here and it sounded totally awesome. Don’t listen to the brain worms, they are full of lies!
Thank you, Deathjavu and NG! I will hold fast to that knowledge. Nom, nom, nom, I will chew up ALL the brain worms. I eat them all up, and they are DELICIOUS! Yum, yum, yum… They will never bother me again (for now).
Wait YOU’RE eating them? That’s the OPPOSITE of what you’re supposed to do, now I have to do even more work eating them (but more opportunities to get them to taste better, so thanks anyway? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯)
Speaking of which, did you make that egg drop soup in the end? It takes a few tries to get the perfect soup/time/power ratio down. A little rigorous experimentation, as Dina might say.
I know you’ve probably done what you need to do by now, but my favorite tricks for writing resumes or whatever is to either pretend I’m writing it about someone else (I can describe someone else more positively than I’d talk about myself) or pretend I am a super snooty noble elf describing exactly why these commoners would be lucky to have me deign to work for them.
Hope you get the job! With your hard copy. After being given a D. Uh… Ok, that, uh…
Anyway, you only think it’s a paycut because we’ve been conditioned to think that the only thing of value is money. “Cutting down on stress levels” (which I presume will happen, since you’re no longer afraid for your safety) has a great many health benefits. I’ve seen invoices from US healthcare. You might actually be making more of a profit out of this change.
That’s a great way to look at it, JBento! Thank you for that valuable insight! You are ABSOLUTELY right. I can figure out ways around money. I can’t figure out ways around health. Got that right for sure.
And I didn’t say, “Gimme SOME D.” ;-D I meant as in, “Gimme a D! Gimme an R! Gimme an A! Gimme a G! Gimme an O! Gimme an N! Gimme an S! What does that spell? DRAGONS! Gooooo… DRAGONS!”
(At least, that’s what I assume cheers sound like. They probably don’t. But that’s what they sounded like 40 years ago in popular conception, IIRC.)
I don’t think Jennifer care about that, at least right now. I feel so sorry seeing Ruth so desperate to say that to her. Maybe Joyce is really Jennifer’s best friend right now, for better or worse.
I really really miss Jennifer and Ruth together.
really early on they did enable each other’s bad impulses and vices but after that they complimented each other and kept each other strong through their struggles with daily life and their addictions.
plus, their personalities work wayyy better together than Ruth with blonde pencil neck or Jennifer with personalitieless future mod boss
The freckles on Ruth’s arms are really cute~ Also that shade of yellow Jennifer always wears is like my favorite shade of yellow, not quite butter, not quite daffodil, just a bright lil pastel sunshine :3
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OK Ruth. I believe you.
Rejection stings…
*plays “Underground” by David Bowie*
If you have to announce you’ve moved on, you haven’t moved on.
Or not all the way.
It’s only forever.
It’s not long at all.
Suspiciously Specific Confirmation?
(take 3: need to figure out how links work around the filter)
[possibly, THOSE links are blocked but idk]
what links? are they the tasty kind or the missing kind?
Seems like the missing kind. And since it LOOKS like 3 wood have been posted, the golf kind.
The best links are the wurst.
I haven’t had a good breakfast lately, and I hear the wurst is yet to come.
*sprays ana with squirt bottle* no, bad Ana, no linking TvTropes, people have things to do, probably.
These strips go up at midnight in my timezone. It’s a week night and I have work in the morning.
I do NOT need to be up at three with thirty tabs open, trying to find an exact quote from an episode of The Golden Girls I vaguely remember because I want to add an example to a maddeningly specific trope.
…
(sheepishly begins closing tabs)
Yet another example of tvtropes ruining someone’s life.
How dare you unleash this evil upon the comment section! clicks link
TV Tropes is kid stuff. Every time Yotomoe posts an imgur link, I wind up scrolling through memes and random political crap for an hour.
Same. I can only break free when the tab finally crashes.
You call it ruining, I call it making it AWESUUUUUME.
Followed it. Read it. Returned with following extra links. I’m alive, and if not well, at least not worse for wear.
I think you can put up to two links in a single comment and it posts right away, but you’ll get caught in the moderation queue if you include three or more.
“He’s from England, you don’t know him.”
She does actually know him, enough to be disappointed in Ruth’s choice of bartender
Why does everyone hate Jason?
He’s a stuffy dweeb with a big mouth and no sense to help him keep that mouth shut. And his dick looks funny, can’t trust a guy with a funny-lookin’ wiener. Who knows what sort of European devilry and secrets he’s hiding in there?
Also he was a really shitty teacher
Canada is so full of people’s girlfriends that there’s no room for boyfriends, and they subcontract those to England.
True story:
I went to grad school in Kentucky for reasons. Canada is too far for the “girlfriend in Canada” line but they have a local equivalent, “girlfriend in Ohio.”
Which is all fine except for the part where I actually did have a girlfriend in Ohio, and I don’t think anyone, not one single person, ever believed me about that.
All I can think about is this scene from Naked Gun 2 1/2.
Yeah but you moved on to Jason….That’s such a downgrade.
At least it’s post-makeover Jason. He used to be much worse
https://i.imgur.com/zAgGjV3.png
This strip is sorely lacking Carla.
That is such a good one, I love the energy in it.
eee she’s so pretty in this!!
Yoto, you can’t casually drop the fact that you’re the first person brave enough to call Carol a milf and then not follow up, I literally respect you more than the armed forces.
You know what? You’re right, she’s got a horrible…everything, but the moms of the cast deserve the yotomoe treatment too and she’s clearly the source of a lot of the aforementioned joyce genes
https://imgur.com/a/Y7rjTFz (suggestive)
Here’s all the stuff I’ve drawn of her. Though I will say my art, unlike Carol, my art hasn’t aged well
I am tempted to draw her again though.When I woke up today I was not expecting to find Carol hot
Yotomoe I would lay my body down on barbed wire at D-Day so you could crawl over safely.
I’m honestly disappointed we didn’t get to see more of Stacy getting to be a cougar on the prowl especially because IMO she’s the only one of the moms to show up in one of the slipshines, right? But….Carol IS single now, i’m just waiting for her to become one of those wanna-be conservative outrage merchants online who posts long rants in their car about how the liberals ruined her marriage but she’s only popular because of the Brown family genetics. I’m kind of horrified but delighted at the idea of Carol having a post-divorce midlife crisis and becoming a way less modest cougar.
Well Stacy is a mom who’s got it goin’ on. She’s all I want and I waited for so long.
that is how she got her name
Quick, what’s the best Stacy crackship. I vote she and Walky have a night on the garbage roof
Remind me who Stacy is.
I see what you did there at the top of the thighs and I entirely approve.
Shading? I don’t see it.
If you’re not familiar with the term, look up “zettai ryoiki” or “absolute territory”. Image search, you’re welcome.
Nice Carla. ^^
Ruth is fine.
She’s okay with the events that are unfolding currently.
o3o I still ship ’em.
And their boyfriends.
Just throw them all into a pile.
Hmmm…. which do you think sounds tastier, the Maple Stack or the Walkerton Sandwich?
Maple stack, definitely.
Hasn’t Asher made a couple of appreciative comments about Walky’s appearance lately? Who knows, maybe he’d be down.
As for Jason, I think it’s pretty clear he’s going to do whatever Ruth tells him to. Ruth may have misinterpreted the “and Subs” on the sign outside, but she still found what she was looking for.
Asher has definitely, uhh, demonstrated some admittedly quite bi moments.
I guess Jason will be playing the straightman both comedically and literally.
“Women want to be with him, men want to also be with him.”
I wouldn’t mind excluding Jason, personally.
Honestly he IS the weakest link of this scenario. I’d just feel bad leaving him out. But yeah if he couldn’t make it I wouldn’t be too disappointed.
Interesting that Jennifer decided to come back to check up on Joyce the same day
Gives her a chance to learn that it’s not the birth control she was unnerved about after her appointment (if Joyce is awake and decides to share about the referral with Jennifer)
Totally moved on
As we all know, yelling down the hallway at someone that you’ve moved on is a clear indication that you have, in fact, moved on.
Her yelling is just an indication of how much she’s moved on. Much like the fact Becky and Dina had sex, the louder you shout something the more true it is. This has been established.
Same vibes as the person I heard shout, “I’m not being defensive!” earlier today.
You actually heard that?
It was a very unpleasant time in the Starbucks.
utterly without precedent
Once a teacher shouted at me “I’M NOT SHOUTING”
… Luckily I was able to switch classes XD
Once you’ve gotten to the point where the phrase “I’m not being defensive” needs to be pulled out, there are 3 options: Everyone Laughs, Roll Credits; Slug it out and let the victor be Correct; Sloppy makeouts on the Starbucks table and let the victor be Correct.
Now, I’m picturing slugs making out in the Starbucks in Pike Place Market (I’m guessing slugs are in places other than Washington, but that’s the only place I’ve personally seen them).
They’re all over the place. Long as it’s damp enough, they’re happy to settle down.
Sort of.
Oh no. Poor Jason.
I don’t think he’s that invested. Yet
They’re just using each other for a while
Isn’t it a bit early for the boyfriend thing? Has it even been more than 2 days?
It’s been long enough to where I remember someone (Joyce? I forget) being weird about her hooking up with a dude despite Ruth being pretty clear about being bi. In fact, I thiiiink Jennifer was suggested to be her first girl she’s been with.
In any case, I think it’s been like a week-ish maybe, but the time table in this comic can be a little tough sometimes.
Exaggeration to make Billie jealous presumably
Nah she’s not trying to make her jealous. She’s trying to seem unbothered, and convince her she’s moved on. And convince herself, probably.
Herself more than anyone I’d reckon
5 days I think, but he’s practically moved in so I think it’s appropriate.
It could still implode of course, it’s early days.
Wasn’t Ethan on some sort of “boyfriend/ex-collecting” thing and counting “guys I made out with for 45 minutes”?
And one of the more reasonable characters rightly pointed out that this wasn’t a relationship.
Billie: I am what you made me.
Ruth: You did this to yourself!
*ignites lightsabers*
Uh huh. Yup. Sure. Sure you did, Sweetie. I believe you. Would a comic character lie?
I’m gonna need that shirt
A reminder that everything Ruth’s said is just as awkwardly said by someone who actually is largely over an ex as it is someone who is in no way, shape or form over an ex.
We’re fucking awkward people, folks, grab a pint and groan.
I need some of Jennifer’s take-charge, can-do, no-BS, alpha bongo energy right now.
Whatever you intend to do with that energy, I hope you succeed!
(now if only I could lend you some of mine Dragon Ball Z style….)
Thank you. I need all the positive vibes I can get. I’ve got a job application due in 2 hours. I know I would rock the house with this job and I’m overqualified and it’s even a pay cut (comparatively speaking) but it would get me out of a job where I feel afraid for my safety. And my AuDHD brain is f-ing terrified to put all my skill on 4 pages and press “send”.
So thank you for the Dragon Ball Z energy. It’s helping already.
AuDHD, PTSD, TBI, RS, RSI… all the stuff that makes me feel self-doubt in my abilities, even though I know I’m a capable badasse.
You are a capable badass Laura, your neurodivergent stripes are whatever you want them to be.
Godspeed!!!!
*plays “Dragon Soul” from Dragon Ball Z*
(Oh and by the way, I’d advise not to disclose of Autism or ADHD to an employer unless you need to, it could lead to pay cuts and other not so pleasant surprises, just a little heads up
)
Sage advice. Thank you, NG.
I also have the brain worms which make me think very little of myself, and then I go to an interview and they finish up by begging me not to accept another offer until they get back to me; later that day I wrote my summary life story here and it sounded totally awesome. Don’t listen to the brain worms, they are full of lies!
Not unless they’re alien parasites like me
Eating those other wormy buggers is part of my niche
(or maybe it’s like a Good Witches from North/South Bad Witches from East/West kinda deal like in Wizard of Oz. Eh, I dunno ¯\_(ツ)_/¯)
Thank you, Deathjavu and NG! I will hold fast to that knowledge. Nom, nom, nom, I will chew up ALL the brain worms. I eat them all up, and they are DELICIOUS! Yum, yum, yum… They will never bother me again (for now).
I appreciate your support.
Wait YOU’RE eating them? That’s the OPPOSITE of what you’re supposed to do, now I have to do even more work eating them (but more opportunities to get them to taste better, so thanks anyway? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯)
Speaking of which, did you make that egg drop soup in the end? It takes a few tries to get the perfect soup/time/power ratio down. A little rigorous experimentation, as Dina might say.
Maybe later. Little hot today for soup. But I’ll give it a shot at night maybe!
thanks!!!
I know you’ve probably done what you need to do by now, but my favorite tricks for writing resumes or whatever is to either pretend I’m writing it about someone else (I can describe someone else more positively than I’d talk about myself) or pretend I am a super snooty noble elf describing exactly why these commoners would be lucky to have me deign to work for them.
Ooh, I LOVE that idea! I have another job application I want to get done tomorrow. I am gonna be the SUPEREST snooty noble Elfe! Huzzah!
Thank you!
I appreciate your looking out for me and helping me reframe things, Sarah R.
Thank you, lovelies! Much gratitude to each of you!
I missed the deadline for electronic submission but I can still submit a hard copy in a few hours. I am so grateful for my cheering squad!
Gimme a D! Goooooo DRAGONS! (As Jennifer would say.)
Hope you get the job! With your hard copy. After being given a D. Uh… Ok, that, uh…
Anyway, you only think it’s a paycut because we’ve been conditioned to think that the only thing of value is money. “Cutting down on stress levels” (which I presume will happen, since you’re no longer afraid for your safety) has a great many health benefits. I’ve seen invoices from US healthcare. You might actually be making more of a profit out of this change.
Best of luck!
That’s a great way to look at it, JBento! Thank you for that valuable insight! You are ABSOLUTELY right. I can figure out ways around money. I can’t figure out ways around health. Got that right for sure.
And I didn’t say, “Gimme SOME D.” ;-D I meant as in, “Gimme a D! Gimme an R! Gimme an A! Gimme a G! Gimme an O! Gimme an N! Gimme an S! What does that spell? DRAGONS! Gooooo… DRAGONS!”
(At least, that’s what I assume cheers sound like. They probably don’t. But that’s what they sounded like 40 years ago in popular conception, IIRC.)
Thank you for the chuckle and the advice, JBento.
As Gracie Bermudez is:
https://www.gocomics.com/baldoespanol/2022/06/17
(Sent to moderation abysse 1st time around)
And I thought the awkward post breakup run ins with Walky and Dorothy was hard to watch.
MY BRITISH BLONDE BOYFRIEND!
… THAT I HAVE!
And who totally isn’t an American teaboo
I don’t think Jennifer care about that, at least right now. I feel so sorry seeing Ruth so desperate to say that to her. Maybe Joyce is really Jennifer’s best friend right now, for better or worse.
Sometime around 2030: the Ashon ship sails. (Or would it be Jasher?)
I really really miss Jennifer and Ruth together.
really early on they did enable each other’s bad impulses and vices but after that they complimented each other and kept each other strong through their struggles with daily life and their addictions.
plus, their personalities work wayyy better together than Ruth with blonde pencil neck or Jennifer with personalitieless future mod boss
Sorry, I can understand miss Ruth and Jennifer as a couple. But Jennifer with a future mob boss is perfect, perfect, PERFECT.
Is this implying that if Ruth and Billifer reboot, Jason and Asher will ?
“WE HAVE SEX!!”
Uh-huh. Yup. Sure have!
Jennifer already knows Ruth hooked up with Jason, anyway.
https://www.dumbingofage.com/2021/comic/book-11/05-as-long-as-its-free/filledmein/
(This one and the one after it.)
But she didn’t know he was her boyfriend. Actually I don’t think anyone did until this strip.
That final line was very specific, Ruth. Are you ok?
Yes, you’ve definitely move on Ruth. I absolutely believe you and this is not sarcasm at all.
Neither of them have moved on
Gooood… Gooood….
Eyyyy.
….Hooray (No idea why I can’t get the href tag to work)
https://www.dumbingofage.com/2021/comic/book-11/05-as-long-as-its-free/filledmein/
Maybe the stupid trailing ‘/’
The freckles on Ruth’s arms are really cute~ Also that shade of yellow Jennifer always wears is like my favorite shade of yellow, not quite butter, not quite daffodil, just a bright lil pastel sunshine :3
Right? I always liked her more saturated yellows in the early comic better, her comfort queen clothes were always a joy to see.
Who believes Jennifer is less upset about Ruth moving on and more upset she didn’t sleep with her boss for Jennifer’s benefit?
I think she’s mostly upset that Ruth looks better in overalls than she ever will.
Probably most of us here.