Dumbing of Age Book Twelve

Dumbing of Age

A college webcomic by David Willis
RSS
‹
›
  • Home
  • About/Read before posting
  • Archive↓
    • by calendar
  • Cast
  • Store↓
    • Main Store (books and stuff)
    • T-shirts
  • Patreon↓
    • Patreon (regular)
    • Patreon (NSFW)
  • Facebook
  • Instagram
ma'am, this is a galasso's
First Previous Random 235Comments Share Next Latest
Reddit Digg Facebook MySpace Delicious Stumbleupon Buzz Up! Mixx Technorati Google Bookmarks Yahoo Bookmarks Yahoo MyWeb Windows Live Propeller FriendFeed Newsvine Xanga LinkedIn Blinklist Twitter
Discover more Hiveworks comics
The Otherknown
Lorian Merriman
Chandra is a 12-year-old accidental time traveler with a reluctant new dad, who happens to be a member of a feared galactic crime syndicate.
Drugs & Wires
Mary Safro, Io Black
Dan used to be a VR operator until his brain got fried by malware. Now he's stuck delivering packages in a post-Soviet hellhole all while trying to adjust to his new life and find some answers.
Whomp!
Ronnie
A depressed, portly, hirsute anime fan stumbles through life in the ever-pursuit of chicken nuggets and other life-shortening indulgences.
Spinnerette
Krazy Krow, Rocio Zucchi, Pablo Rey
When a lab accident gives Heather Brown spider powers and six arms, she does what any midwest comic geek would do: Become Ohio's #3 superhero!
Atomic Robo
Brian Clevinger, Scott Wegener
The robot punches monsters and bad robots and one time he was a cowboy.
Sunshine Boy
Moosopp
New-kid Kelly is sweet but naive. Luckily, he's got his outgoing neighbor Grey in his corner.
Star Trip
Gisele Weaver
Jas is a human taken from her home planet on a trip across the galaxy she will never forget.
Solstoria
Angelica Maria
After her brother goes missing, Samantha vows to become a Knight and help those around her in the Kingdom of St. Helena.
Far to the North
Allison Shaw
Kelu turns to the monsters of her remote mountain home when her family is held hostage by outsiders.
Monster Pulse
Magnolia Porter Siddell
Four kids run afoul of a creepy secret organization's experiments, which turn their body parts into fighting monsters. Part sentimental coming-of-age story, part monster-training shonen manga, with just a bit of sci-fi body horror.
Tove
Severin
The end of the world is coming, and Tove doesn't want to be a hero, but SOMEONE has to look after her little brother.
2 Slices
RJ Morel
After a case of mistaken identity, will awkward Daisuke find help from excitable Mamo, or will his love life be thrown completely off track?
Killjoys
Flatw00ds
When two disgraced ex-feds fall backwards into trouble with the clown mafia, getting out in one piece is gonna be no joke!
Real Science Adventures
Brian Clevinger
Spin off stories and other adventures from the world of Atomic Robo!
Sam & Fuzzy
Sam Logan
Troubled by gangster rodents, lovesick vampire stalkers, or confused ninja assassins? Don't panic! Sam and Fuzzy are here to help. (For a reasonable fee.)
Hazy London
Scotty
A story about messy relationships. From friendly foes to crazy families. Nothing is black and white, just full of color. But, all colors can get a little hazy...
Demon Studies
Miyuli
Four students summon and study potentially dangerous demons within the walls of the mysterious Summerland University.
Wychwood
Varethane
When Tiara's pyrokinesis is finally noticed, she is captured by a magical research organization for study. If she cooperates, she could be helping to save humanity from a dire threat - but can she trust them?
Come Hell or High Water
Jenny/Star, Mori
Prince Gladimir was never meant to fall for a pirate. Swearing off love for duty, the threat of war propels him back into the Captain’s world of high seas and high stakes. Their relationship could be the thing to save the kingdom of Yvoire - or destroy it.
MASKLESS
kickingshoes
In a world where people can wield the magic of elemental Masks, all Ashe wants to do is help. Maskless and useless, with dreams of fire and smoke on the back of his tongue, he finds himself on a strange, dangerous path to uncovering the secrets of these incredible objects, and the source of the monsters plaguing his home.
Lunar Blight
Studio CARTRIDGE, Laura Lee
Lunar Blight is a gothic horror story about an elite knight serving a moon cult who must choose between upholding his honoured duty or condemning everything he’s grown to know.
Empowered
Adam Warren
A sexy superhero comedy (except when it isn't) about the never-ending struggles of a plucky but very unlucky young superheroine.
Cyanide & Happiness
Explosm
Satire, dark humor and surreal humor.
Nerf Now!!
Josué Pereira
A cute webcomic about fanservice, video games, and... love. Mostly video games, though.
Folklore
Adam Ma, Colin Tan Wei
A superhuman horror story focused on a small band of survivors trying to navigate a war-torn world in the aftermath of the Federation’s collapse.
Goblins
Ellipsis
A fantasy RPG as told through the eyes of the low-level monsters.
The Witch Door
Anni K.
Katariina Lehto discovers her neighbor is a witch called Jousia Muotka. Jousia introduces Katariina to the strange people and places beyond the witch door...
Demon's Mirror
Harry Bogosian
Based loosely off of "The Snow Queen", a story by Hans Christian Andersen, we see things take a different turn as the demons become central characters, and the side characters stick around. Yup, that's the only differences. Enjoy!
Guilded Age
T Campbell, John Waltrip, Florence Machina
Welcome to the saga of the working-class adventurer! Enjoy the complete story with new annotations daily!
Heart of Gold
Eliot Baum, Viv Tanner
A pianist with failing eyesight seeks out a priest with a miraculous healing touch, drawing him deeper into a world of miracles and curses.
Go Get a Roomie
Clover
Experience the queer journey of an upbeat hippie and the friendships she makes along the way! A tale of self-discovery and love of many forms.
Between Failures
Jackie Wohlenhaus
The low stakes adventures of an assorted group of 20 somethings trapped in the declining years of American retail. They are naughty and say lots of swears.
Dumbing of Age
David M Willis
Joyce has been homeschooled her entire life until now, when she's suddenly a freshman in college! Things don't go well.
Patrik the Vampire
Bree Paulsen
Patrik loves to knit, bake, and help his friends while dealing with his own demons... like his thirst for blood because, oh yeah--he's a vampire.
Knights Errant
J.R. Doyle
Wilfrid's humble quest for revenge becomes bigger and bloodier by the day.
Obelisk
Ashley McCammon
In 1908 New York, a young woman struggles to put her life back together in the wake of her father's death - until she discovers a vampire in the shambles of her inheritance.
Countdown to Countdown
Velinxi
Iris Black is a self-proclaimed inventor with the curious ability to bring his drawings to life, and yearns to find a space where he can use his powers freely.
Girl Genius
Phil Foglio, Kaja Foglio
In a time when the Industrial Revolution has become an all-out war, Mad Science rules the World...with mixed success.
[un]Divine
Ayme
A highschool senior thought giving up his soul for a demon was a good idea. It wasn't.
Paint the Town Red
Windy, Winter Jay Kiakas
Winona runs a werewolf shelter with partner in crime, Odile in the Gothic city of Merlot. One day they take in an injured vampire, and soon unravels many of the dark secrets of Merlot.
Clockwork
Chikuto
Cog Kleinschmidt is a diligent, quiet worker at the Mercia Fortress, the world power's leading stronghold. His orderly life is thrown into chaos when an enemy kingdom sends a diplomat for peace talks. This diplomat needs something from Cog - whether he agrees to their terms or not!
Anacrine Complex
Sae Cotton
A superhuman heist involving probably too many pigeons than entirely necessary.
How to be a Werewolf
Shawn Lenore
Malaya Walters was bitten by a werewolf as a child. After being raised by her human family, she faces the chance to learn what being a werewolf is really like as an adult.
The Lonely Vincent Bellingham
Diana Huh
Vincent is an unkind man looking to disappear, and finds himself in the care of a vampire and her two wicked children.
Fairmeadow
Kendra P. / KP
A wayward soldier finds herself in a pacifist commune deep in the wilderness of a war-weary land. Living in isolation brings her closer to those she was sworn to kill than she could ever imagine - but also threatens to tear the place apart.
Wilde Life
Pascalle Lepas
Oscar decided to rent an old haunted house, and that's when things got weird...
El Goonish Shive
Dan Shive
WARNING: This comic often ignores the Laws of Physics
Awaken
Koti Saavedra/Flipfloppery
Superpowers, monsters and conspiracies. Piras, the spoiled Dameschi heir, fights to recover his identity after becoming a terrorist!
No End
Erli, Kromi
A queer romance about people attempting to build lives in a cold, post-apocalyptic world ravaged by hordes of undead.
Lighter Than Heir
Melissa Albino
A young Volant woman joins the military in an effort to upstage her war-hero father.
BOOKMARK
Click "Tag Page" to bookmark a page. When you return to the site, click "Goto Tag" to continue where you left off.
Goto TagClear Tag


BUFFER WATCH Comics are currently drawn and uploaded through:

May 19, 2026

Budding

by David M Willis on July 22, 2023 at 12:01 am
  • 04 – But Don't Give Yourself Away
└ Tags: amber, charles, sydney, walky

Discussion (235) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. Doctor_Who
    Doctor_Who
    July 22, 2023 at 12:03 am | #

    Meanwhile, Galasso is just off-panel carefully taking notes. Finally, someone explaining how reproduction works!

    • StClair
      StClair
      July 22, 2023 at 12:06 am | #

      Either that, or making a face like Optimus when Sari explained it to him.

      • cbwroses
        cbwroses
        July 22, 2023 at 12:13 am | #

        Do you mean making a face that looks like Optimus?
        Or a face that Optimus makes?
        Also, if you’re feeling extra detailed with it, which Optimus and which version of said Optimus?

        • David M Willis
          David M Willis
          July 22, 2023 at 12:18 am | #

          https://tfwiki.net/wiki/File:Sariprime.jpg

          • Sirksome
            Sirksome
            July 22, 2023 at 12:23 am | #

            Ah, I remember when Optimus was young and inexperienced and had a chin, and Megatron was just a head in a building, and Starscream had a bunch of clones representing his personality, including a girl one which maybe implies he’s trans in more ways than one.

            • zee
              zee
              July 22, 2023 at 1:22 pm | #

              When Optimus had a mouth that didn’t look weird
              All I’ve learned from being exposed to transformers media is that they should stop giving Optimus a mouth. Masked up only, it’s such an improvement

          • cbwroses
            cbwroses
            July 22, 2023 at 12:25 am | #

            Oh shit, I forgot about this!

    • Decidedly Orthogonal
      Decidedly Orthogonal
      July 22, 2023 at 2:56 am | #

      “A” Galasso’s ALT-text?

      • Wizard
        Wizard
        July 22, 2023 at 9:06 am | #

        This store is merely the first step in his plan of global domination. In time, all will be Galasso’s.

        • Mark
          Mark
          July 22, 2023 at 5:41 pm | #

          Eventually it will become impossible to build anything but more Galasso’s.

    • bcb
      bcb
      July 23, 2023 at 3:33 pm | #

      Oh my cheese I hadn’t thought of how Galasso’s Shortpacked lack of knowledge about reproduction would play off against the Dumbiverse version of Amber.

  2. Ana Chronistic
    Ana Chronistic
    July 22, 2023 at 12:03 am | #

    “Ma’am, this is Galasso’s.”

    • Ana Chronistic
      Ana Chronistic
      July 22, 2023 at 12:03 am | #

      HEY alt-text

      also, NO Pepsi is NOT acceptable!

      • cbwroses
        cbwroses
        July 22, 2023 at 12:06 am | #

        Don’t let my mother read that.

      • David M Willis
        David M Willis
        July 22, 2023 at 12:08 am | #

        no pepsi is not acceptable? double negative that means pepsi is acceptable

        • Mano308gts
          Mano308gts
          July 22, 2023 at 12:12 am | #

          Honestly I would read that to indicate that every Pepsi is ok, rather than simply a double negative… If no Pepsi is not acceptable, the opposite is every Pepsi is acceptable. XD

        • Dara
          Dara
          July 22, 2023 at 12:17 am | #

          Ce n’est pas un Pepsi

        • BarerMender
          BarerMender
          July 22, 2023 at 12:36 am | #

          Why commas matter? Or simple pedantry?

          • Taffy
            Taffy
            July 22, 2023 at 12:56 am | #

            Commas have no rights. Commas are NOT protected under the constitution.

            • AbacusWizard
              AbacusWizard
              July 22, 2023 at 1:58 am | #

              You’re forgetting the 9th Amendment though.

              • Taffy
                Taffy
                July 22, 2023 at 3:06 am | #

                How can I forget what I never knew?

                • Morleuca
                  Morleuca
                  July 22, 2023 at 10:24 am | #

                  its the one that says the constitution doesn’t cover everything and that there could be inalienable right the founding fathers didn’t think of, or that would exist as society changes and time goes on.

                • Taffy
                  Taffy
                  July 22, 2023 at 2:44 pm | #

                  I wonder why they glossed over that one whenever I took that dopey “Constitution Test” back in fifth grade.

                • thejeff
                  thejeff
                  July 22, 2023 at 3:18 pm | #

                  Because it’s really hard to do anything with it. You really can’t use it legally to establish a right, since you could make the same argument for literally anything.

                • Taffy
                  Taffy
                  July 22, 2023 at 3:22 pm | #

                  Still, it would be really handy to keep in mind. I don’t trust the people in charge not to downplay it for controlling reasons.

        • Francoinblanco
          Francoinblanco
          July 22, 2023 at 2:18 am | #

          “We don’t need no education”

          • Taffy
            Taffy
            July 22, 2023 at 3:07 am | #

            …said the US education system.

            • a/snow/mous/e
              a/snow/mous/e
              July 22, 2023 at 12:54 pm | #

              “We don’t need no gun control” said the GOP

        • Needfuldoer
          Needfuldoer
          July 22, 2023 at 4:25 am | #

          Real sugar Pepsi is better than HFCS Coke. I wish they still sold it (and Mountain Dew Throwback) in 2 liter bottles.

          • Shade
            Shade
            July 22, 2023 at 4:33 am | #

            You know they make real sugar coke too right? You just need to look outside of the land of corn.

            • Taffy
              Taffy
              July 22, 2023 at 4:57 am | #

              $25 per bottle plus shipping isn’t worth it for a Coke

              • Azhrei Vep
                Azhrei Vep
                July 22, 2023 at 6:48 am | #

                Damn, you poor people. I can grab one for about about a buck fifty at most grocery stores. Except for the one solid week a month when they’re all out at once.

                • Otl1973
                  Otl1973
                  July 22, 2023 at 9:12 am | #

                  Here (south Florida) the stores (including Costco) always carry Hecho en Mexico Coke (sugar and in glass) – but pricier than “regular”. We also get (US) sugar Coke in 2 liter bottles, but usually only around Passover.

                • Taffy
                  Taffy
                  July 22, 2023 at 2:50 pm | #

                  Well yeah, I am poor, like “$14 in my account to last me indefinitely” type poor. Soda is like $2 now and it’s starting to price me out of drinking it (overall win for my health, but it’s still a bad omen). And most of the grocery stores here don’t carry it, outside of the ones way on the complete opposite end of town.

              • Wizard
                Wizard
                July 22, 2023 at 9:19 am | #

                Here in deepest FOA, my local Wal-Mart sells Mexican Coke, plus we have a couple of Mexican grocery stores. I wasn’t terribly impressed, but maybe it’s just a case of what you’re used to.

                • Morleuca
                  Morleuca
                  July 22, 2023 at 10:26 am | #

                  what ever happened to the hurricane bottles

              • Needfuldoer
                Needfuldoer
                July 22, 2023 at 9:52 am | #

                Look for Coke bottles with yellow caps around Passover. They make that version with sucrose and sell it for the same price as the HFCS formula.

            • Laura
              Laura
              July 22, 2023 at 6:50 am | #

              I miss mecca cola…

              • Laura
                Laura
                July 22, 2023 at 7:10 am | #

                I also miss just plucking sassafras twigs from the tree and chewing on them all day. (Instant root beer flavor!) But apparently sassafras oil has some health concerns to it now.

                • Otl1973
                  Otl1973
                  July 22, 2023 at 9:16 am | #

                  I’m guessing health concerns to it then too, just not known ones.

                • Laura
                  Laura
                  July 22, 2023 at 10:45 am | #

                  Well, yeah, but hopefully not enough to matter for a kid who just likes to chew twigs all day.

        • Mark
          Mark
          July 22, 2023 at 8:52 am | #

          It is not acceptable that there is no Pepsi.

      • Ryan
        Ryan
        July 22, 2023 at 2:07 am | #

        No tuna. Cheeseburger!
        No Transformers. Pepsi!

    • Ophidiophile
      Ophidiophile
      July 22, 2023 at 2:26 am | #

      Galasso’s routinely has weirder people than you. It’s a pizza joint.

  3. Animedingo
    Animedingo
    July 22, 2023 at 12:04 am | #

    Im gonna be honest

    I didnt read all that

    • NGPZ
      NGPZ
      July 22, 2023 at 12:05 am | #

      I did. Loved every bit of it! ☺️

    • Yearofthecat
      Yearofthecat
      July 22, 2023 at 12:26 am | #

      It’s worth reading

    • not someone else
      not someone else
      July 22, 2023 at 12:57 am | #

      Happy for the Transformers though. Or sorry that happened

    • Steamweed
      Steamweed
      July 22, 2023 at 1:01 am | #

      Gotta have our exposition _somewhere_. Very important to the plot!

    • Angel
      Angel
      July 22, 2023 at 1:39 am | #

      i’m sure it’d be great to listen to on a podcast

      Plot twist: Amber infodumping about it is going to make walky crush on her again and suggest a polycule for real lol

      • Azhrei Vep
        Azhrei Vep
        July 22, 2023 at 6:49 am | #

        Hell, it’s making me crush on her, and I’m nowhere near as closer to her as Walky is.

        • John Campbell
          John Campbell
          July 22, 2023 at 8:18 am | #

          Amber gravatar weird but possibly appropriate for this comment.

        • Angel
          Angel
          July 22, 2023 at 4:26 pm | #

          i know she has a small livestream following so who knows maybe despite her privacy and stuff she’s internet famous as a robotic themed vtuber or so XD

  4. NGPZ
    NGPZ
    July 22, 2023 at 12:04 am | #

    Fuck yeah Amber! Show us your raw Autistic Resonance!!! 🤘😈 ✌️😎

    *plays “Torture Dance Song” from JoJo Golden Wind on hacked muzak*

  5. Sirksome
    Sirksome
    July 22, 2023 at 12:05 am | #

    I prefer Coca Cola actually. Pepsi is for people who are young and hip and like a little protest in their soft drink.

    • Yumi
      Yumi
      July 22, 2023 at 12:08 am | #

      I stopped really drinking soda when I was twelve, but I always preferred Coca Cola to Pepsi. I think it might have been, in part, low stakes tribalism, though. These days, I’ll have an occasional sip of soda, but I don’t enjoy much more than that, so I haven’t tested it out recently.

      • BarerMender
        BarerMender
        July 22, 2023 at 12:40 am | #

        Or it might have been because Coke is good and Pepsi is rubbish.

        • John Campbell
          John Campbell
          July 22, 2023 at 8:20 am | #

          Eh, colas all taste like soap to me. Sunkist or gtfo. (AFAICT, it’s the only caffeinated orange soda.)

    • cbwroses
      cbwroses
      July 22, 2023 at 12:09 am | #

      My mother is 65 and won’t even admit to liking coke (despite choosing it twice in two different taste tests).
      She is not young, she doesn’t protest, though she apparently thinks she’s too cool for a minivan.

    • anonymsly
      anonymsly
      July 22, 2023 at 12:23 am | #

      Weirdly, I personally like Coke better as far as regular soda, but Diet Pepsi is leagues ahead of Diet Coke for me. Not sure why.

      • Rose by Any Other Name
        Rose by Any Other Name
        July 22, 2023 at 12:37 am | #

        If I recall correctly, regular Coke is ‘Coke Classic’ whereas Diet Coke is actually diet New Coke, so that might be the reason. Whereas Coke Zero is diet Coke Classic.

        Generally, Coke Classic has less sweetener than Pepsi/New Coke, allowing more of the caffeine flavor (ie bitter like coffee) to seep through. That’s the ‘sharpness’ of Coke Classic. See also the ‘bite’ of Barc’s rootbeer.

        • Miri
          Miri
          July 22, 2023 at 2:41 am | #

          I tried Diet Coke once and it tasted like it had diluted washing up liquid in there to me, but that was in the 90s. It put me off.

          Also up until I was about 7 I didn’t understand why anybody liked fizzy drinks. I’d kinda had a permanent cold for the first chunk of my life, with accompanying sore throat, and drinking things that feel like sandpaper going down hurt. Getting a bit of a break from that was nice…. (Currently on the same cold I had since May… My body’s bad at shaking them. But the antibiotics cleared up the side-helping of pneumonia I got to enjoy late May/early June so it’s kinda fine?)

          Now when I want one, I tend to order a pint of orange and soda water. Or if I really want something sweet, pineapple and soda water.

          • Laura
            Laura
            July 22, 2023 at 7:08 am | #

            I’m so sorry you have been sick for so long, Miri!

            *Sends you a pot of hot black tea with honey (preferably raw local wildflower honey) and fresh lemon, boiled up with a clove of fresh garlic and a chunk of fresh ginger root.*
            (Other remedy recipes call for something more peppery, but I don’t want to exacerbate your sore throat. Lots of honey!)

            Or a hot toddy with black tea and rum.

    • HueSatLight
      HueSatLight
      July 22, 2023 at 12:48 am | #

      Danny finally realizing Amazi-girl and Amber aren’t quite the same person.

      • HueSatLight
        HueSatLight
        July 22, 2023 at 12:51 am | #

        oops, not meant to reply here. I can’t drink cola anymore, so root beer when I’m having a soft drink.

      • Laura
        Laura
        July 22, 2023 at 11:08 am | #

        Yeah. I’m guessing Amber and Amazi-Girl will both have their friendships with Sal and Danny trashed by the end of the evening. Folks are often unforgiving of damage done by alters.

        I’m reminded of this comic:

        https://www.asofterworld.com/index.php?id=1063

        Which is sad, because Amazi-Girl actually does like them both and enjoys having friends.

    • someone
      someone
      July 22, 2023 at 3:45 am | #

      Coca-Cola has neither coca nor cola, and therefore sucks by default for being a lie. Yes, the coke is a lie.

      Pepsi-Cola, likewise. What the heck is pepsi supposed to even be?

      • eh, whatever
        eh, whatever
        July 22, 2023 at 5:59 am | #

        Doesn’t it still contain cola nuts? They contain loads of caffeine.

        • Jon
          Jon
          July 22, 2023 at 11:22 pm | #

          Coca-Cola hasn’t used kola extract since 2016, probably because climate shift made it harder to grow the trees the nut comes from. The caffeine content of the raw nut is usually between 2-4%, so the loss of the extract from the Coca-Cola recipe can easily be compensated for with caffeine from virtually any other source.

          Other hand, I’m not sure they should be allowed to keep using the name, given that neither of the substances it’s named for can be found in the soda today.

      • khn0
        khn0
        July 22, 2023 at 10:56 am | #

        I used to not like any cola, the drank a few times since it was all that was available beside plain water, then got a big time without it and remarked something: it’s not only an acquired taste, but a taste you have to acquire anew each time you spend enough time without drinking it. Result: I prefer to have plain water at room temperature, even that room is a car parked for eight hours in the sun that have some coke (but water has to be in something else that a plastic bottle).

      • Laura
        Laura
        July 22, 2023 at 2:33 pm | #

        Peptic acid?

        • Opus the Poet
          Opus the Poet
          July 22, 2023 at 9:34 pm | #

          That’s just dilute Hydrochloric acid.

    • zee
      zee
      July 22, 2023 at 1:25 pm | #

      Wild how much if a war it is when the only difference is that coke is a fraction less sweet. Both are undrinkable without rum or lime juice anyway

      • zee
        zee
        July 22, 2023 at 1:25 pm | #

        (team GinsengUP Cola flavor)

      • cbwroses
        cbwroses
        July 22, 2023 at 3:46 pm | #

        Pretty sure coke is sweeter.

      • Opus the Poet
        Opus the Poet
        July 22, 2023 at 9:36 pm | #

        There used to be just a fraction of cinnamon in Coke that wasn’t in Pepsi. I could taste the difference.

  6. cbwroses
    cbwroses
    July 22, 2023 at 12:05 am | #

    Amber is practically glowing right now.

    • Vanessa
      Vanessa
      July 22, 2023 at 1:23 am | #

      This is the happiest we’ve seen Amber in a long time! Someone asked about one of her special interests, insisted even, and is actually letting her talk about them. Beautiful to see, weird that it’s Sal’s disconnected goofball dad.

      • Jamie
        Jamie
        July 22, 2023 at 9:45 pm | #

        I have a feeling I know why he asked, and I don’t like it.

  7. Cattleprod
    Cattleprod
    July 22, 2023 at 12:05 am | #

    Shortpacked-Amber reaching across the multiverse to get revenge against Sydney. Assuming they were even personally enemies in Shortpacked, I can’t remember.

    • Regalli
      Regalli
      July 22, 2023 at 12:08 am | #

      Sydney was everyone’s personal enemy in Shortpacked who worked at Shortpacked.

      And Amber was a superhero, thus necessitating a nemesis. So at least in a meta way I think it works. (I know Sarah Palin was Robin’s direct Axis of Something counterpart.)

      • Cattleprod
        Cattleprod
        July 22, 2023 at 12:37 am | #

        My memory of Shortpacked is hazy enough that I can’t recall if Sydney’s big push was before for after Amber moved away.

      • Leorale
        Leorale
        July 22, 2023 at 12:54 am | #

        Iirc, Sydney thought they were the nemesis of everyone in Shortpacked (on account of getting laid off after Christmas sales season), but nobody particularly remembered who Sydney was.

  8. raja
    raja
    July 22, 2023 at 12:06 am | #

    I’m learning so much, keep going Amber

  9. Yotomoe
    Yotomoe
    July 22, 2023 at 12:06 am | #

    If someone responded to me asking “Is Pepsi ok” by explaining transformers reproduction lore in detail I’d assume Pepsi is not ok.

    • Sirksome
      Sirksome
      July 22, 2023 at 12:10 am | #

      Actually I think it means she’d prefer Pepsi Nitro. The only soda infused with nitrogen for a smooth and creamy finish that appeals the discriminating transformer.

    • Yumi
      Yumi
      July 22, 2023 at 12:12 am | #

      Hm, I think I’d assume Pepsi was okay. I don’t know why. Maybe I’d think the bottom dialogue in panel three was meant to be the takeaway. Maybe I’d think, “This person has other things to think about right now. They will accept the soda.”

      • eh, whatever
        eh, whatever
        July 22, 2023 at 6:05 am | #

        I’m baffled anyone would assume anything. I’d just keep repeating the question.

  10. RassilonTDavros
    RassilonTDavros
    July 22, 2023 at 12:07 am | #

    I think this might be the most Amber has smiled since Mike died. I’m not used to it.

  11. Wraithy2773
    Wraithy2773
    July 22, 2023 at 12:07 am | #

    Well, one can’t argue that Amber isn’t going all the way with the plan, that’s for sure…

  12. Regalli
    Regalli
    July 22, 2023 at 12:07 am | #

    You know, given what Amber has been summoned to do, this is the most effective way of going about it I can think of.

    I’m still laughing. Beautiful. Poor Sydney.

    • NGPZ
      NGPZ
      July 22, 2023 at 12:12 am | #

      Yee, her autism powers make her perfect for this! 😁😋

    • Freemage
      Freemage
      July 22, 2023 at 6:00 pm | #

      I’m’a make a prediction, here. Not based on anything other than what we’ve seen so far, and probably super, super wrong, but it’ll still amuse me if it is in any way correct.

      Off-panel, Chuck is reacting with the exact level of Lovecraftian horror that one would expect, wondering what he hath wrought, and hoping that enough laudanum will suppress the dreams. Meanwhile, Linda is going full denial, tuning Amber’s actual speech out so she can focus on ‘what’s important’ (which certainly is NOT skin-color, however would you get that idea?).
      Thus, when the party breaks up, Chuck and Linda have utterly disparate viewpoints. This leads to an argument, that escalates quickly, in part because Linda is so used to Chuck just going along with her wishes. Eventually, she crosses a key line, and says something ~blatantly~ racist, lacking any plausible deniability.
      At that point, things spiral, until they announce they are getting a divorce. Linda, somehow blaming Lucy for everything and seeking solace, runs across Carol, who suggests she come to a community faith meeting to ‘get some perspective’. This leads to a mirror of the Reagan-era alliance between Southern racists and far-right religious zealots, and thus the Evil Mom Alliance is born.
      Unlike the EDA, the EMA focuses on legal shennanigans, harassment and action by proxy, inciting protests against perversion on campus and “Woke Ideology”; they also tap into the local right-wing student groups (most of whom are former fratbros of Ryan’s) to invite demagogue speakers to campus. A smear campaign is launched, suggesting that Lucy (among others) is an “affirmative action admission” that should have her admission re-reviewed. Linda taps into her old relationship with the Dean to help push things along and at least prevent an official retaliation.
      Meanwhile, Chuck and Hank meet up in a bar, they bond over drinks and some incidental similarities, and wake up sharing a motel bed; they look at one another uncertainly, before gently holding hands. Somehow, Robin ends up officiating their mutual second marriage.

      Thus Endeth The Prediction.

      • Jamie
        Jamie
        July 22, 2023 at 9:47 pm | #

        Prediction, schmediction. I think you just recited the plot of Left Behind.

  13. Nathan
    Nathan
    July 22, 2023 at 12:07 am | #

    Willis spending ten years writing a complex, nuanced story about growing up and changing as a person and grappling with religion and sexuality and family, all so he can lure in an audience and spend the next six months subjecting them to Transformers sex lore.

    • Jo_cubstar
      Jo_cubstar
      July 22, 2023 at 12:15 am | #

      Brilliant and I am here for it!

    • sultryglebe
      sultryglebe
      July 22, 2023 at 1:09 am | #

      Next Slipshine.

      • Bogeywoman
        Bogeywoman
        July 22, 2023 at 3:24 am | #

        Transformer slipshine where Carla is the transformer (for multiple reasons)

        • Opus the Poet
          Opus the Poet
          July 22, 2023 at 9:42 pm | #

          Butt of course. Carla is all about Transformers, after Ultra Car. Of course.

    • Bo
      Bo
      July 22, 2023 at 11:17 pm | #

      the long game…

  14. C.T. Phipps
    C.T. Phipps
    July 22, 2023 at 12:09 am | #

    Charles: Who else is aroused?

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      July 22, 2023 at 12:13 am | #

      Sal: Believe it or not.

    • Steamweed
      Steamweed
      July 22, 2023 at 1:11 am | #

      David, too. It’s a family thing.

  15. Yotomoe
    Yotomoe
    July 22, 2023 at 12:11 am | #

    Walky looks happy and engaged so I’m gonna keep my crusade that I think they should get back together.

    • David M Willis
      David M Willis
      July 22, 2023 at 12:20 am | #

      i read that as “engorged”

      • NGPZ
        NGPZ
        July 22, 2023 at 12:23 am | #

        Spoilers? 😏

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        July 22, 2023 at 12:23 am | #

        I’ll save that description until AFTER lunch.

    • pope suburban
      pope suburban
      July 22, 2023 at 6:06 am | #

      Yeah his face here is so animated and attentive. Not something we’ve really seen with Lucy. Of course some of that could be the chaos in which he’s currently engaged, but I don’t think that’s all of it. Oof.

  16. Nono
    Nono
    July 22, 2023 at 12:11 am | #

    I hope ‘transgressive’ was a Transformers pun.

    • cbwroses
      cbwroses
      July 22, 2023 at 12:14 am | #

      If it wasn’t, it’s transformed into one now.

      • True Survivor
        True Survivor
        July 22, 2023 at 12:25 am | #

        It was sort of hidden in there. A pun in disguise if you would.

  17. Alongcameaspider
    Alongcameaspider
    July 22, 2023 at 12:11 am | #

    Willis is the closest thing to a transformers expert I know so I am just going to accept all that information as factual and not look into it any further

    • Rose by Any Other Name
      Rose by Any Other Name
      July 22, 2023 at 12:42 am | #

      Wise you are.

    • NGPZ
      NGPZ
      July 22, 2023 at 12:56 am | #

      Yeah, I mean he’s THE Transformers Stan.

    • Allandrel
      Allandrel
      July 22, 2023 at 10:47 am | #

      I mean, one could look it up on the Transformers wiki, but Willis almost certainly wrote whatever one would find.

  18. Sneakystorms
    Sneakystorms
    July 22, 2023 at 12:12 am | #

    Are we in danger of Walky falling back in love with amber after this? His smile has me worried!

  19. Mr. Random
    Mr. Random
    July 22, 2023 at 12:13 am | #

    You’re just having fun, aren’t you.

    • Bo
      Bo
      July 22, 2023 at 11:16 pm | #

      there’s NOTHING funny about Transformers lore, this is all Serious business >:I

  20. Keldas
    Keldas
    July 22, 2023 at 12:14 am | #

    Oh gosh walky’s gonna fall in love with her. I expected walky and Lucy to end but not like this

    • Steve C.
      Steve C.
      July 22, 2023 at 8:38 am | #

      Even if Walky did fall for her, I can’t imagine Amber being willing to reciprocate due to her own eff’d upness.

  21. Rei
    Rei
    July 22, 2023 at 12:14 am | #

    I do not know any transformer lore or background. This is unironically fascinating to me.

  22. UrsulaDavina
    UrsulaDavina
    July 22, 2023 at 12:14 am | #

    Can I have a Baja Blast zero please?

  23. Doom Shepherd
    Doom Shepherd
    July 22, 2023 at 12:15 am | #

    Black Cherry Real Sugar Pepsi was Best Pepsi.
    My wife has spoken.

    • cbwroses
      cbwroses
      July 22, 2023 at 12:17 am | #

      Your wife has good taste.

      • clif
        clif
        July 22, 2023 at 12:54 am | #

        Then why isn’t she drinking Dr. Pepper?

        • Taffy
          Taffy
          July 22, 2023 at 12:58 am | #

          Because she has good taste.

          • NGPZ
            NGPZ
            July 22, 2023 at 1:00 am | #

            I like Dr Pepper? Pika pika? 😮

            • Sirksome
              Sirksome
              July 22, 2023 at 1:19 am | #

              You fools. Don’t you see you’re playing into these soda distributors hands?! Dr. Pepper, Pepsi, Coke, RC, Shasta, Diet Rite. It’s all the same crap. They want you to fight, to identify with their brand so you go out and buy more their bullshit carbonated, corn syrup, sugar water! They sit in their ivory tower raking in profit from our petty spats cause they know trying to innovate in the soft drink industry is a fruitless endeavor. No one would normally drink mango, or fucking ginseng infused horse piss unless they felt they were getting one over on the other guy’s nearly identical crap. Say no to soda war profiteering!

              • NGPZ
                NGPZ
                July 22, 2023 at 1:27 am | #

                I like Dr Pepper when i in the mood for a cola but not too much caffeine 😄

                • cbwroses
                  cbwroses
                  July 22, 2023 at 7:09 am | #

                  Technically Dr Pepper isn’t a cola as it has no kola nuts.
                  That’s how they won a lawsuit against Pepsi back in the day who felt the names were too similar.

                • Taffy
                  Taffy
                  July 22, 2023 at 3:23 pm | #

                  It’s also a complete fucking fraud. What, I’m supposed to believe that billions of cans and bottles and Chapsticks have a doctorate?

              • Laura
                Laura
                July 22, 2023 at 7:03 am | #

                *Plays “Coke is the Drink of the Death Squads” on the hacked jukebox…*
                https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=O7GXdfJ2nxE

    • Laura
      Laura
      July 22, 2023 at 7:15 am | #

      Cherry coke comes close, though! Cherry vanilla coke is awesome too.

      • Laura
        Laura
        July 22, 2023 at 7:16 am | #

        (Hypocritical, I know. “I am vast. I contain multitudes.” As Whitman said. Or something like that.)

      • Opus the Poet
        Opus the Poet
        July 22, 2023 at 9:45 pm | #

        Cherry Vanilla Coke Zero is the best, fight me.

  24. Yotomoe
    Yotomoe
    July 22, 2023 at 12:16 am | #

    “You see, Charles, I put on the transformers costume and mix and mingle with other people in similar suits. It’s a whole convention full of likeminded people! It’s not sexual. Although I do have lots of sex while I’m wearing it.”

  25. Robyn
    Robyn
    July 22, 2023 at 12:22 am | #

    Wow ok I was expecting a simple explanation of mpreg or something like that, I underestimated Amber’s power level. (I realize what it says about me that I immediately assumed the pregnant Transformer in the image was male.)

    • Jay
      Jay
      July 22, 2023 at 12:53 am | #

      Yesterday’s pregnant transformer? Yep, Scorponok’s a guy.

      Also, they were very nearly a Single Gender Race, so your odds would be pretty good anyway!

      • Robyn
        Robyn
        July 22, 2023 at 5:04 am | #

        lol I missed that Amber said it was canon! Love that for him

    • Miri
      Miri
      July 22, 2023 at 2:45 am | #

      And Walky instantly requested mpreg pics

  26. newlland(Henryvolt)
    newlland(Henryvolt)
    July 22, 2023 at 12:22 am | #

    And I thought the Spider-Man and TMNT mythos was fucked up and weird…and I found out about the time Spider-Queen Assaulted Peter Parker the other day.

    • Bo
      Bo
      July 22, 2023 at 11:26 pm | #

      is this referring to ‘Spider-Man: Turn Off the Dark’, the hit Broadway musical????

  27. Caro
    Caro
    July 22, 2023 at 12:23 am | #

    SYDNEY!

  28. BBCC
    BBCC
    July 22, 2023 at 12:24 am | #

    Amber is very knowledgeable!

    Just maybe needs to answer about Pepsi. XD

  29. True Survivor
    True Survivor
    July 22, 2023 at 12:25 am | #

    Wait, so then what’s a protoform like they had in that one epsiode TFP where Starscream clones himself? Also, are the transformers coming out of the ground a spontaneous autogensis thing, them being created by the All-Spark or Primus (who is kinda Cybertron in away), or are they sprouting from seeds or spores of somekind? There are different (apparent) sexes of transformers. Are they getting the seeds via sexual reproduction? I have so many questions I don’t want to have but my love of scify and biology is too strong.

    • J. Spider
      J. Spider
      July 22, 2023 at 2:35 am | #

      Protoforms have always been a weird deal since they were introduced in Beast Wars. They’re often treated as unactivated blank slates that can be anything but we also have clear evidence of past lives.

      Prime/Animated both show protoforms as the beginning of the transformer lifecycle. But Beast Wars shows Rampage having been previously activated before he was made a protoform and RID gives us Autobot protoforms who were remade into Decepticons but can still recall their autobot memories.

      Basically protoforms aren’t necessarily baby transformers but rather transformers in some sort of a heavily malleable state.

  30. morhek
    morhek
    July 22, 2023 at 12:29 am | #

    Thank god he stopped her before she started explaining Kiss Players.

    • cbwroses
      cbwroses
      July 22, 2023 at 12:41 am | #

      What is a Kiss Player?

      • Proxiehunter
        Proxiehunter
        July 22, 2023 at 12:52 am | #

        You could google it, but I recommend you don’t. And yeah, I could explain it but I don’t want to be responsible for doing that to someone.

        • Svankensen
          Svankensen
          July 22, 2023 at 1:33 am | #

          You should have warned me more strongly. Basically looks like pedophilic transformers.

      • Taffy
        Taffy
        July 22, 2023 at 12:59 am | #

        Transformers but they have to make out with little girls.

    • Bo
      Bo
      July 22, 2023 at 11:12 pm | #

      oh gods

  31. DailyBrad
    DailyBrad
    July 22, 2023 at 12:39 am | #

    Not sure what it says about me that I would willingly hang out with Amber.

  32. Cmasta1992
    Cmasta1992
    July 22, 2023 at 12:50 am | #

    Oh Lucy…you left Walky to the wolves and you don’t even know it. It’s joever

    I hope Willis gives her something nice in the plot down the road

    • clif
      clif
      July 22, 2023 at 12:56 am | #

      Go Team Garbage!!!

      • Cmasta1992
        Cmasta1992
        July 22, 2023 at 1:35 am | #

        Yet another one of my DoA ship sinks…

        I cannot cheer for your happiness

  33. Alex Boston
    Alex Boston
    July 22, 2023 at 12:55 am | #

    Wow I did not know any of this! I naively assumed that transformers were all built (or rebuilt).

  34. Steamweed
    Steamweed
    July 22, 2023 at 12:57 am | #

    100%, I was gonna comment here: “Ma’am, this is a Galasso’s.”

    Then I thought to check the hovertext……

    • Taffy
      Taffy
      July 22, 2023 at 1:00 am | #

      And then you posted it anyway. Checkmate, atheist.

      • Steamweed
        Steamweed
        July 22, 2023 at 1:14 am | #

        Let the record show Willis thought it first. And me (reviews notes) at best fourth.

  35. Straximus
    Straximus
    July 22, 2023 at 1:02 am | #

    Omg, she’s talking about The Swarm. I want to hang out with Amber and talk Transformers. Esp if we’re discussing the Marvel G1/G2 era. That’s my jam.

    • Thomas
      Thomas
      July 22, 2023 at 2:46 am | #

      Can’t tell if Amber is trolling or this is real TF lore. AFAIK Willis has sure never mentioned any of this on Twitter and it’s exactly the kind of thing he’d discuss. (Which is to say anything I know about Transformers I got second-hand via Willis.)

      • Thomas
        Thomas
        July 22, 2023 at 2:57 am | #

        Also a little disappointed in a robot society that frowns on building new robots.

        • Taffy
          Taffy
          July 22, 2023 at 6:06 am | #

          Why should a robot society be free of all the dipshit bigotry us organics are addicted to?

          • Thomas
            Thomas
            July 22, 2023 at 6:54 am | #

            Because a robot society is a fictional thing that doesn’t exist. I dunno, I just think building new robots seems a fun thing to explore. Turns out they don’t do that. Yes, I do understand a fictional world is more interesting if it allows us to explore real-world problems from a different angle. But also, robots building new robots!

            • Laura
              Laura
              July 22, 2023 at 7:21 am | #

              Like in STTNG with Data’s daughter.

              • Laura
                Laura
                July 22, 2023 at 7:22 am | #

                “I was unaware, Captain, that crew members needed to ask your permission before procreating. Have I missed something?” (Paraphrase)

        • David M Willis
          David M Willis
          July 22, 2023 at 11:03 am | #

          They don’t frown on building new robots — they manufacture them as quickly as they can, because they need to win wars. It’s just that since they’re not born the “regular” magical way, there was a time they weren’t considered equals.

          • Thomas
            Thomas
            July 22, 2023 at 1:11 pm | #

            A-ha! Thanks for clearing that up! Makes good sense as a story.

  36. kater
    kater
    July 22, 2023 at 1:18 am | #

    She’s my favorite

  37. MisterJinKC
    MisterJinKC
    July 22, 2023 at 1:20 am | #

    Ma’am, this is Gallasos.

  38. Angel
    Angel
    July 22, 2023 at 1:37 am | #

    lol i thought sydney was fired? tho surprised she wasn’t like “Well you’re getting X anyways”

    • Laura
      Laura
      July 22, 2023 at 7:23 am | #

      “They”, IIRC.

  39. SDRainbow
    SDRainbow
    July 22, 2023 at 1:45 am | #

    absolutely not, pepsi is a travesty

  40. Suet
    Suet
    July 22, 2023 at 2:03 am | #

    I don’t think asexual reproduction is a sexual crime; it’s a physics crime surely.

    That’s the longest amount we’ve heard from Amber. I hope this place serves Crystal Pepsi.

  41. fireprincesslily
    fireprincesslily
    July 22, 2023 at 2:04 am | #

    I’ve changed my mind, this plan actually rules

  42. DarkoNeko
    DarkoNeko
    July 22, 2023 at 2:13 am | #

    of course it’s ok. Pepsi is better.

  43. Francoinblanco
    Francoinblanco
    July 22, 2023 at 2:24 am | #

    to be honest if the old traditional way of breeding is jumping off the rocks of cybertron like dwarves then other methods can look like playing god or frankenstein.
    And I dont see difference between pepsi and cola so pepsi is ok

  44. Doopyboop
    Doopyboop
    July 22, 2023 at 2:44 am | #

    I feel so bad for Sal. Do they approve of Danny at LEAST partially because he’s a sweet little white boy nerd? Yes. Was it still getting Sal approval and interaction she had never gotten from her parents, as well as the fact that Sal sincerely likes Danny and got to introduce them to her parents. Granted, her parents also used the opportunity to pat themselves on the back for their shitty parenting BUT I think Sal was still enjoying some of the benefits. Finally, she was the center of attention for their parents. And in a GOOD way.

    …And then Walky comes in with Amber to torch the whole dinner as part of a lesson about racism. Which is clearly not going to plan. Linda didn’t magically forgive Amber just because she was white. When Walky does try to go ‘See?! Lucy’s so much better than Amber!!”, I think his parents are just going to be confused about who his girlfriend really is. Linda may even ask to talk to the manager. Amber and Walky have now hogged all of the attention for shenanigans when Lucy and Walky could have arrived together and proven themselves, if not flip off Linda and Charles themselves if they did microaggressions which Sal would have helped them with.

    This was so poorly thought out and I hope Sal will be alright by the end.

    • Wraithy2773
      Wraithy2773
      July 22, 2023 at 3:03 am | #

      While you’re probably right about the direction, I do think its worth keeping an open mind about the possibilities here. I can see two less likely, but still possible alternatives:

      1: Linda and Charles pull Walky aside to ask him what happened to Lucy, and the main reason they haven’t yet is that they’re having trouble dealing with Amber’s… Amberness.

      2: Linda/Charles call out Walky on this obviously not being serious. They probably don’t understand *what* the actual motive is, but they know that this isn’t sincere, and aren’t shouting Amber down because… well, one part her Amberness, and one part them wanting to be sure.

      Again, you’re most likely right about this going horribly wrong or horribly right, but we’re still mid-scene, sometimes Willis surprises us.

    • Needfuldoer
      Needfuldoer
      July 22, 2023 at 4:21 am | #

      Walky literally obstructing Sal in yesterday’s strip was pretty symbolic, wasn’t it.

    • Leorale
      Leorale
      July 22, 2023 at 12:58 pm | #

      Yeah, I’m getting lots of sibling feels for Sal in this whole arc. And Sal is trying so hard to be sincere and vulnerable — but then comes Walky shenanigans, Sal gets covered up, no more attention left for Sal.

    • cbwroses
      cbwroses
      July 22, 2023 at 3:52 pm | #

      It’s been like a literal minute.
      That is way too short to say whether or not this plan will work.
      Yes, it’s a terrible plan, but not necessarily because it won’t highlight the parent’s racism and treatment of Sal.
      We need more time to say whether or not that part of the plan will fail or not, especially since Linda is the main force behind that behavior and the last things she did was snap “Charles!” two strips ago.

      • Taffy
        Taffy
        July 22, 2023 at 7:04 pm | #

        I choose to remove the quotation marks and take your newly-modified comment about Linda snapping Charles in the most violent way possible. She has broken the man in half and there’s nothing you can do to convince me you weren’t the one who said it first.

  45. Sean Smith
    Sean Smith
    July 22, 2023 at 3:09 am | #

    Man Sal came here to see what it would be like if he got along with her parents and Walky came here to see what it would be like if he didn’t.

  46. Bryy
    Bryy
    July 22, 2023 at 3:31 am | #

    This strip is topical because of SDCC.

    • NGPZ
      NGPZ
      July 22, 2023 at 3:47 am | #

      Pika pika?

      • Bryy
        Bryy
        July 22, 2023 at 3:57 am | #

        GEEK SHIT.

        • NGPZ
          NGPZ
          July 22, 2023 at 4:01 am | #

          😋 Sounds like a delicious time!

          • Taffy
            Taffy
            July 22, 2023 at 4:59 am | #

            Phrasing

  47. John Campbell
    John Campbell
    July 22, 2023 at 3:59 am | #

    See, Sydney, this is why you’ll never be a successful supervillain. You should tell her, “You are not worthy of Coca-Cola! You will drink Pepsi, and you will hate it! But you will drink it anyway! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!”

    • Needfuldoer
      Needfuldoer
      July 22, 2023 at 4:19 am | #

      That’s the big reveal when the customer takes their first sip, right? Lull them into thinking they’re getting Coke right up until that moment.

      • Taffy
        Taffy
        July 22, 2023 at 5:02 am | #

        Now I’m wondering if there’s any tangible difference between the two composition-wise. Some kind of dietary restriction against one but not the other (sugar doesn’t count, literally just drink less of it).

        • Needfuldoer
          Needfuldoer
          July 22, 2023 at 5:28 am | #

          Pepsi is sweeter initially, Coke has a more complex aftertaste. They fought a whole war about it back in the 70s and 80s, as memorialized in Billy Joel’s 1989 hit We Didn’t Start the Fire.

          • Taffy
            Taffy
            July 22, 2023 at 5:35 am | #

            I meant something more like “Turns out Pepsi contains certain [science word] that causes people with [fairly rare allergy] to can’t drink it syndrome, but Coke doesn’t have that”.

            • Laura
              Laura
              July 22, 2023 at 7:35 am | #

              Originally, that special ingredient was coca leaves (cocaine plant).

              https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coca-Cola

              • HueSatLight
                HueSatLight
                July 22, 2023 at 11:50 am | #

                cocaine is also what provided the pep in pepsi. I believe the difference is the acids used. Coke is supposedly all phosphoric acid, and pepsi is mostly phosphoric acid, but some citric acid, which is included as “natural flavors” in the ingredients list.

                • Laura
                  Laura
                  July 22, 2023 at 2:35 pm | #

                  Fascinating!

  48. Needfuldoer
    Needfuldoer
    July 22, 2023 at 4:17 am | #

    Amber’s info-dumping habit hits a little close to home, here. When to rein that tendency in was one of the most important lessons I’ve learned over the years.

    Hi, Sydney.

  49. Michael Lanting
    Michael Lanting
    July 22, 2023 at 5:02 am | #

    Galasso’s has Pepsi instead of Coke? I knew that guy was evil, but I didn’t realise he was quite THAT bad.

  50. Acher4
    Acher4
    July 22, 2023 at 5:03 am | #

    I knew nothing of all of these….

    “I regret all my life’s choices”

  51. JBento
    JBento
    July 22, 2023 at 5:17 am | #

    Cursed strip.

  52. StClair
    StClair
    July 22, 2023 at 5:48 am | #

    Panel 4: so “Spike” means “dick”, got it.

    (someone say the line)

    • Taffy
      Taffy
      July 22, 2023 at 6:02 am | #

      What line?

      • StClair
        StClair
        July 22, 2023 at 1:21 pm | #

        the one that was put in just to get a PG rating instead of the dreaded G.

        • Taffy
          Taffy
          July 22, 2023 at 2:38 pm | #

          “Shit happens.” “Shit?” “Happens.” “Shit happens…”

  53. Amós Batista
    Amós Batista
    July 22, 2023 at 6:07 am | #

    I really thought Transformers came from some space junkyard. Growing up like fungus, mushrooms…

    • Zaxares
      Zaxares
      July 22, 2023 at 6:16 am | #

      Those are the Junkions, I believe. And I’m guessing they were already pre-built or something and were just hiding underground? I dunno, my Transformer knowledge is decades out of date. XD I was actually under the impression that all new Transformers were constructed, so what Amber said in today’s strip is all-new to me!

  54. fy
    fy
    July 22, 2023 at 7:09 am | #

    if i was their server, i would either love or hate amber, it would entirely depend how busy we were. slow day? this is my favorite table, tell me more. slammed dinner rush? shut the fuck up and order.

    • Taffy
      Taffy
      July 22, 2023 at 2:32 pm | #

      If it helps, they don’t seem to have come in during a particularly busy time.

  55. Heather
    Heather
    July 22, 2023 at 7:15 am | #

    I guess this kind of thing just happens to franchises which are around for decades on end. Keep trying to one up previous iterations. And if they can’t do that they’ll try to at least make it weirder.

  56. TheScreenJockey
    TheScreenJockey
    July 22, 2023 at 7:19 am | #

    It’s nice to see Amber genuinely enjoying herself for a moment.

  57. AlaninDC
    AlaninDC
    July 22, 2023 at 7:29 am | #

    Twenty years ago, this is how my own kid and her friends followed Pokémon. Couldn’t shut them up.

    • Taffy
      Taffy
      July 22, 2023 at 2:31 pm | #

      And to think, there were only like 386 Pokémon at the time. Now we’re up to 1008, and I pity the unpreparents whose kid is about to Start™.

      • Opus the Poet
        Opus the Poet
        July 22, 2023 at 9:55 pm | #

        Now you’re talking about my grandson…

  58. thumb
    thumb
    July 22, 2023 at 7:56 am | #

    Willis finally allowing himself to get this off his chest. It’s been a long while since Shortpacked.

  59. Owlmirror
    Owlmirror
    July 22, 2023 at 8:46 am | #

    LOL remembering a few strips back when Amber was all “I’m just gonna sit quietly and look at my phone.”

    Now do DC/Marvel crossover slashfic.

    And, hey! I predicted Sydney would be there! Will we get the rant+Linda asking for the manager?

    • Taffy
      Taffy
      July 22, 2023 at 2:27 pm | #

      Is there something specific to Marvel/DC slashfic I should know about? I’m basically looking for an excuse at this point.

      • Opus the Poet
        Opus the Poet
        July 22, 2023 at 9:57 pm | #

        You mean you never heard about the Hulk/Supergirl slash?

        • Taffy
          Taffy
          July 22, 2023 at 10:22 pm | #

          I’ve never heard of the any slash at all.

  60. Mark
    Mark
    July 22, 2023 at 9:18 am | #

    Really, nobody noticed the bit in panel 3 about it being bad to treat people worse just because they’re different? Just slid it right through and kept talking. Amber is too good at this for Walky’s wacky hijinks.

    • Exarch
      Exarch
      July 22, 2023 at 8:20 pm | #

      I noticed for sure- honestly the most interesting part of today’s comment to me for sure. This is actually good conversation and I wish the characters would talk about it

  61. Hof1991
    Hof1991
    July 22, 2023 at 9:55 am | #

    Fools. This is Sydney’s comic. Even if she hasn’t appeared for four years. Victory is inevitable and will be sweet.

  62. raker
    raker
    July 22, 2023 at 11:36 am | #

    To be honest, and servers should know this, NO! When I order a coke, Pepsi is never ok.

    • PedanticJerkass
      PedanticJerkass
      July 22, 2023 at 1:10 pm | #

      If you order a Coke, and they ask if Pepsi is okay, it’s probably because they don’t serve Coke products at all in that restaurant. I.e. your choice will be Pepsi (or some other Pepsi product like Sierra Mist or whatever) or tea or water or nothing at all.

      • Taffy
        Taffy
        July 22, 2023 at 6:56 pm | #

        That’s why I always say “I’d like a cola, please”. Doesn’t stop some of the denser ones from asking if Pepsi is okay, and I don’t have it in me to say “Yes, that’s why I said ‘cola’ and not ‘Coke'”, but it helps about as often as not.

        If I want a cola but Pepsi isn’t okay, I’ll just ask for something the fuck else, becaues I’m not about to escalate the situation over a fucking beverage.

  63. RoyanRannedos
    RoyanRannedos
    July 22, 2023 at 1:46 pm | #

    Ma’am, this is Galasso’s.

  64. ADLegend21
    ADLegend21
    July 22, 2023 at 1:59 pm | #

    ngl Amber looks hot in panel 4. She’s so confident and in her element.

    • Taffy
      Taffy
      July 22, 2023 at 2:26 pm | #

      Confidence is sexy, and anyone who disagrees is fragile.

  65. Mark
    Mark
    July 22, 2023 at 5:55 pm | #

    Amber slowly rises from her chair, turns to Sydney with a frosty expression, and says, quietly, “no, Pepsi is not OK. Bring me a Coke. NOW.” She turns away, sits back down, and resumes her discourse as if nothing has happened.

    Sydney backs away slowly, thinkinig furiously where is the nearest Coke, because at last he has seen true power.

  66. wakeangel2001
    wakeangel2001
    July 22, 2023 at 8:15 pm | #

    so where do the protoforms factor in? Are they the things that grow like daisies? Also, when is the spark infused? Do you put the spark in the protoform or does the protoform grow with one inside and it waits for some trigger to animate it?

  67. Bo
    Bo
    July 22, 2023 at 11:10 pm | #

    i love the lore of sci-fi based on licensed toys so so very much

  68. JA
    JA
    July 23, 2023 at 3:07 am | #

    “Ma’am, this is a Galasso’s.”

  69. Friendly Frankenstein
    Friendly Frankenstein
    July 23, 2023 at 6:45 am | #

    Alright fine I’ll read the transformers wiki entry on reproduction you got me willis.

  70. KilljoyBob
    KilljoyBob
    July 24, 2023 at 7:08 pm | #

    Seems like that would make it awkward when the Autobots met Sparkplug and Spike.

    “You named your son WHAT?!”

Who should be the default doodle for Book 14?

View Results

Loading ... Loading ...
  • Polls Archive
CONVENTION APPEARANCES


May 3, 2025 - FCBD @ Laughing Ogre Comics in Columbus, Ohio

David M Willis! avatar
David M Willis!
@damnyouwillis.bsky.social
damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 3h
iykyk
6
2
31
 
damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 4h
Would you like to take a survey? Do you like to eat beans? Do you like George Wendt? Would you like to eat beans with George Wendt? Would you like to watch a movie about George Wendt eating beans?
5
20
85
 
damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 4h
thirty different editorial cartoons about St Peter greeting him with NORM!, coming right up
3
2
40
 
damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 7h
today in #9chickweedlane i learned FUCK YOU, INSTITUTION OF MARRIAGE, WE COULD JUST BE FUCKING OUR DOGS INSTEAD, AND WITH LESS CAKE I GUESS wait what
10
30
 
reposted by David M Willis!
eddierobson.bsky.social's user avatar
Eddie Robson @eddierobson.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
I didn't know my mum was writing promotional emails for Nintendo now
Nintendo marketing email reading
23
684
3216
 
reposted by David M Willis!
darrylayo.bsky.social's user avatar
Ayo @darrylayo.bsky.social ⋅ 11h
I just got fired from Star Wars because my prequel idea was the exact same as the existing prequels except that Palpatine was going to be bishonen hot
2
15
80
 
damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 10h
so i'm thinking, okay, i took some extra photos of this set of doors this year so i could draw some other angles, it's an important set of doors, so let's pull up my new reference photos... ....and do you see a problem, do you see an issue
16
3
66
 
damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 11h
i agree! let's all celebrate the weeniejob
6
3
45
 
damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 20h
Dumbing of Age: "Hmmmm hmm" www.dumbingofage.com/2025/comic/b... #webcomics #webcomic
www.dumbingofage.com
Hmmmm hmm
7
32
 
damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 20h
"man, what a loser, maybe i don't wanna kill this guy's daughter after all"
8
1
53
 
reposted by David M Willis!
ironspike.bsky.social's user avatar
Iron Spike @ironspike.bsky.social ⋅ 21h
DING!!! FUNDED! Thanks so much, gang! www.kickstarter.com/projects/iro...
5
25
244
 
damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
(May 20, 2026)
Walky!  Afraid to greet the sun.  It's early.  And it's math.  Ugh.
2
4
35
 
damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
I bet it was all those Dilberitos.
5
7
39
 
reposted by David M Willis!
brentosaur.bsky.social's user avatar
🎄 Barb O. Saur 🎄🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈 @brentosaur.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
Repost with a pic of your Gay Sex Command Center.
The Nemesis from Transformers.
seanthomason.bsky.social's user avatarSean Thomason @seanthomason.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
Universities can't even have a Gay Sex Command Center anymore, because of woke.
1980s screenshot of Jerry Falwell in a TV control room with chyron
31
126
 
damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
Well, Lizard is here, and I've been telling myself for... years that I'd take down my Endgame shelf and put up Spider-Man:No Way Home once the final villain was out. So. That's a thing I gotta do.
3
1
45
 
damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
www.ebay.com/itm/23611085... buy my unopened shang-chi, wenwu, salma hayek, and talos
header image - Marvel Legends Shang-Chi, Wenwu, Ajak, and Talos, unopened | eBay
www.ebay.com
Marvel Legends Shang-Chi, Wenwu, Ajak, and Talos, unopened | eBay
Find many great new & used options and get the best deals for Marvel Legends Shang-Chi, Wenwu, Ajak, and Talos, unopened at the best online prices at eBay! Free shipping for many products!
4
 
damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatarDavid M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
just discovered "Humor Me," a editorial cartoon where you, the reader, do the cartoonist's job
1
4
76
 
reposted by David M Willis!
atomicdarth.bsky.social's user avatar
unknown @atomicdarth.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
6
33
 
damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
they're just gonna cancel it once they reach 3 seasons
rollingstone.com's user avatarRolling Stone @rollingstone.com ⋅ 1d
Netflix has saved Sesame Street!
header image - Sesame Street Is Relocating to Netflix
rollingstone.com
Sesame Street Is Relocating to Netflix
'Sesame Street' finds new home at Netflix for new episodes and back catalog following the end of its streaming contract at HBO.
12
23
121
 
damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
just discovered "Humor Me," a editorial cartoon where you, the reader, do the cartoonist's job
9
5
43
 
damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
www.ebay.com/itm/23609767... one hour left on this dingus
header image - Transformers Siege Netflix Megatron complete Hasbro WFC Generations Voyager | eBay
www.ebay.com
Transformers Siege Netflix Megatron complete Hasbro WFC Generations Voyager | eBay
This is Netflix War for Cybertron Voyager Class Megatron! A Walmart exclusive, he originally came packaged with the Micromasters Lionizer and Pinpointer, but this auction is just for Megatron. No inst...
7
 
damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
uh oh, chekhov's murderous weirdo
8
39
 
damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
Dumbing of Age: "Practice" www.dumbingofage.com/2025/comic/b... #webcomics #webcomic
www.dumbingofage.com
Practice
5
29
 
damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
www.ebay.com/itm/23610927... a quake, a quake!
header image - Transformers Titans Return Deluxe Class Quake, loose/complete, no instructions  630509511976| eBay
www.ebay.com
Transformers Titans Return Deluxe Class Quake, loose/complete, no instructions 630509511976| eBay
Find many great new & used options and get the best deals for Transformers Titans Return Deluxe Class Quake, loose/complete, no instructions at the best online prices at eBay! Free shipping for many ...
2
3
9
 
damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
okay okay -- spider-man reboot idea the lizard is still dr connors, but he's dr PHIL connors, and he wakes up every day and it's groundhog day and he's a lizard is this anything
11
2
62
 
damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
Dr. Connors is like a chameleon: always a lizard!!!
5
1
23
 
damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
i dunno, he's kinda a tool, but i could go on
2
1
30
 
damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
Somebody teach Greg Evans how to rasterize text and use the warp tool
9
5
105
 
damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
no, he's not a Black dad, he's a
fancy indoor decorating newspaper subsection with the ornate headline
3
13
139
 
damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
4 hours left on [borat voice] my Wipe www.ebay.com/itm/23609982...
header image - Transformers Generations TakaraTomy Legends LG34 Wipe (Mindwipe), incomplete | eBay
www.ebay.com
Transformers Generations TakaraTomy Legends LG34 Wipe (Mindwipe), incomplete | eBay
This is Legends LG34 Wipe (aka Mindwipe), loose! He's also missing Servant, his little monster partner. Yeah, the partner's name is Servant. I just learned that now, somehow, while looking this toy up...
1
2
7
 

©2010-2025 Dumbing of Age | Powered by WordPress with ComicPress | Subscribe: RSS | Privacy Policy | Back to Top ↑