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June 8, 2026

Futurewives

by David M Willis on June 20, 2023 at 12:01 am
  • 04 – But Don't Give Yourself Away
└ Tags: becky, dina, joyce

Discussion (187) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. Ana Chronistic
    Ana Chronistic
    June 20, 2023 at 12:02 am | #

    *gasp* …IT’S TRUE

    • Clif
      Clif
      June 20, 2023 at 3:01 am | #

      Is that a smile in the last panel?

  2. butts
    butts
    June 20, 2023 at 12:02 am | #

    we are all partial to terrible lizbians

    • Doctor_Who
      Doctor_Who
      June 20, 2023 at 12:03 am | #

      It’s an amazing nickname. Honestly, if they weren’t already together, they would be obligated to hook up just to use it.

  3. MM
    MM
    June 20, 2023 at 12:03 am | #

    I for one welcome our lizbian overladies.

    • Jude Deluca
      Jude Deluca
      June 20, 2023 at 12:04 am | #

      We may prove useful to them by helping round up dissidents to toil in their underground sugar mines

      • Dean
        Dean
        June 20, 2023 at 12:07 am | #

        Breakfast cereal mines, surely.

        • MM
          MM
          June 20, 2023 at 12:08 am | #

          It’s the only way to stave off the Soggies.

  4. Caro
    Caro
    June 20, 2023 at 12:04 am | #

    oh my god, terrible lizbians. isn’t that a callback to an alt text on one of the very first strips where they interacted?

    • HueSatLight
      HueSatLight
      June 20, 2023 at 12:11 am | #

      :O https://www.dumbingofage.com/safe-2

    • Sophie
      Sophie
      June 20, 2023 at 1:57 pm | #

      Damn, that was 8 years ago. I can’t even remember where I left my keys this morning.

  5. Schpoonman
    Schpoonman
    June 20, 2023 at 12:04 am | #

    “Everybody ****ing stay ****ing calm!”

    • PirateTawnee
      PirateTawnee
      June 20, 2023 at 2:16 am | #

      If you can stay ****ing calm while you’re ****ing there’s a chance you might be doing it sub-optimally.

      • Taffy
        Taffy
        June 20, 2023 at 3:17 am | #

        A perfectly calm **** seems kinda creepy, in a way.

        • woobie
          woobie
          June 20, 2023 at 4:43 pm | #

          Tantric always sounded weird to me.

          • Taffy
            Taffy
            June 20, 2023 at 7:52 pm | #

            Admittedly I know very little about that one. The term, mostly. I think it’s got a connection to yoga? Like 5% sure?

  6. DarkoNeko
    DarkoNeko
    June 20, 2023 at 12:04 am | #

    No mention of the house getting sold eh ?

    • Caro
      Caro
      June 20, 2023 at 12:05 am | #

      you can only fit so much in one strip

    • DailyBrad
      DailyBrad
      June 20, 2023 at 12:11 am | #

      Guessing that bombshell will come after a sec, since I imagine Becky’ll have a lot of feedback on that.

      • Laura
        Laura
        June 20, 2023 at 1:22 am | #

        Hmm, I mean, I’m thinking that Joyce might not want to tell Becky. Keeping things as “low drama” as possible, for now, bearing in mind what Jocelyn told Joyce about keeping Becky within reach of access to resources via Joyce’s family. Also, given that Joyce’s developing religious views still form a sore spot between them.

        • Seregiel
          Seregiel
          June 20, 2023 at 2:22 pm | #

          Pretty sure Hank loves Becky enough to keep up with his support. After all, her mom would be proud of her.

        • Bryy
          Bryy
          June 20, 2023 at 11:39 pm | #

          I think it’s clear that her views are well developed.

    • Angel
      Angel
      June 20, 2023 at 5:20 pm | #

      well they do have a whole lunch to go to so i’m sure they’ll have all the details during that

  7. Proxiehunter
    Proxiehunter
    June 20, 2023 at 12:05 am | #

    No love for Dinasaurus Becks?

    • JessWitt
      JessWitt
      June 20, 2023 at 12:16 am | #

      Ooohh I like that one too!

    • 3oranges
      3oranges
      June 20, 2023 at 12:26 am | #

      D-bex for short. 🙂

      • elfroyalty
        elfroyalty
        June 20, 2023 at 5:58 pm | #

        don’t you mean d. bex? :3

  8. Lori
    Lori
    June 20, 2023 at 12:05 am | #

    Oh, Becky is ROCKING the lesbian flag color scheme, delightful!!!

    • Laura
      Laura
      June 20, 2023 at 1:24 am | #

      Oh, yeah… that IS nice!

  9. Nono
    Nono
    June 20, 2023 at 12:06 am | #

    Honestly surprised Joyce hasn’t called her dad to confirm this.

    • Steamweed
      Steamweed
      June 20, 2023 at 12:09 am | #

      And Dad might have space for the totebins of childhood memorabilia.

    • Alongcameaspider
      Alongcameaspider
      June 20, 2023 at 12:10 am | #

      She’s not exactly on speaking terms with anyone in her family at the moment, the only reason she interacted with her mom is her mom ambushed her

      • DailyBrad
        DailyBrad
        June 20, 2023 at 12:11 am | #

        Well, she talks to Jocelyn, and Becky, but yeah, not likely to talk to John, and who knows with Jordan.

        With Hank, it’s probably just awkward even if she has no major issue with him at the moment.

        • Alongcameaspider
          Alongcameaspider
          June 20, 2023 at 12:33 am | #

          As far as we know she hasn’t talked to Jocelyn since the last time she saw her, we know Joyce is dodging her calls at the very least

        • zee
          zee
          June 20, 2023 at 1:06 pm | #

          She avoids Joss, she’s been rejecting her calls

    • Koms
      Koms
      June 20, 2023 at 12:51 pm | #

      Maybe she hasn’t had time and will do it later off strip. Or she’s putting it off

  10. NGPZ
    NGPZ
    June 20, 2023 at 12:06 am | #

    YEEEEEEEES!!!! Terrible Lizbians set sail!!!!
    🥰🦖🦕🌈🌌 ✌️😈

  11. Cholma
    Cholma
    June 20, 2023 at 12:07 am | #

    TWO SHIPS ENTER, ONE SHIP LEAVES!

  12. Steamweed
    Steamweed
    June 20, 2023 at 12:08 am | #

    Passive-aggressively?
    Or passively-aggressively?
    Maybe passively-aggressive?
    Curse my discontinued keeping-up-with-linguistics.

    • anonymsly
      anonymsly
      June 20, 2023 at 1:01 am | #

      I would personally bet that the first is common usage and the third is grammatically correct.

      Like, the plural of ‘passerby’ that gets commonly used is ‘passerbys’ but grammatically it’s technically passersby.

      • LiterallyJustSomeGuy
        LiterallyJustSomeGuy
        June 20, 2023 at 1:40 am | #

        I usually hear (and use) “passersby,” and that is not really the same situation. “Passive” and “aggressive” are both adjectives. Just as “aggressively” is a word, I see no issue with “passive-aggressively,” which is also the usage I usually hear and use.

      • Daibhid C
        Daibhid C
        June 20, 2023 at 3:56 am | #

        “Passively-aggressive” sounds very wrong to me, like it’s a version of “passive-aggressive” where “passive” is modifying “agressive” rather than the whole thing being a composite word. It doesn’t sound like the whole thing is an adverb.

    • milu
      milu
      June 20, 2023 at 4:01 am | #

      “passive-aggressively” is by far the more common usage.

      Also, it makes sense linguistically. “passive-aggressive” is a word. When heard, it is not analyzed as being made up of 2 separate words “passive” and “aggressive”: it is understood as its own concept. So the adverbial suffix is added to the whole thing, not its original constituents.

      Or such is my understanding anyway

  13. Angel
    Angel
    June 20, 2023 at 12:09 am | #

    futurewives marriage party/plans at a(n) accurate) jurrasic park? 8D

  14. Derek
    Derek
    June 20, 2023 at 12:10 am | #

    I don’t get the lizbian thing
    I’m sure it’s a pun, but it’s escaping me

    on a more nitpicky note couple nicknames are obnoxious and Dina and Becky are less likable for giving themselves one

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      June 20, 2023 at 12:13 am | #

      Liz as in Lizard I think. Cuz Dina’s into dinosaurs and I assume Lizards as a whole?
      And I’m sure someone will come by and tell me that dinosaurs have more in common with modern day avians than lizards and I’ll say “Hey, Dina came up with it. Not me”.

      • MM
        MM
        June 20, 2023 at 12:15 am | #

        Dinosaur comes from the Greek for “terrible lizard.” (Sort of. It’s not a perfect translation, but that’s how it typically gets rendered in English.)

        • HueSatLight
          HueSatLight
          June 20, 2023 at 12:22 am | #

          It’s because they’re closer related to birds, so that makes them terrible lizards.

        • Thag Simmons
          Thag Simmons
          June 20, 2023 at 12:38 am | #

          I’ve also seen it translated as “terrible reptile” which is a more accurate description of the animals at least

          • Jamie
            Jamie
            June 20, 2023 at 12:40 am | #

            Eh, if you get too into the weeds on what’s a lizard and what’s a reptile, you will not come out unscathed. Taxonomy is … a thing. A whole thing.

            • Tan
              Tan
              June 20, 2023 at 12:49 am | #

              Also there is no such thing as a fish, even though we all know what a fish is.

              • Taffy
                Taffy
                June 20, 2023 at 1:01 am | #

                As a dense sort of person in general, I’m gonna have to ask if you’re willing to clarify this.

                • James
                  James
                  June 20, 2023 at 1:18 am | #

                  I suspect they’re referring to the fact that if you found the common ancestor of everything we call a “fish” today, it’s descendants would contain a bunch of species we don’t consider to be fish.

                • Thomas
                  Thomas
                  June 20, 2023 at 1:19 am | #

                  It’s a category that’s made up of everything you have left after excluding the species that have a clear definition. Reptiles are every quadruped that’s neither an amphibian, a mammal or a bird. It’s a group that consists of smaller groups that are not closely related, unlike birds and the rest. The same goes for fish.

              • HueSatLight
                HueSatLight
                June 20, 2023 at 1:08 am | #

                polyphyly’s fine actually. Not everything has to be a clade for every context.

                • Agemegos
                  Agemegos
                  June 20, 2023 at 2:59 am | #

                  Hear! Hear!

                • thejeff
                  thejeff
                  June 20, 2023 at 8:00 am | #

                  Yeah, but I like arguing that whales really are fish, just for different reasons.

              • Bicycle Bill
                Bicycle Bill
                June 20, 2023 at 1:26 am | #

                And then you find something like the platypus, which I can only assume was created by God late on the sixth day, when all he had left were spare parts from all the other critters.

                • Needfuldoer
                  Needfuldoer
                  June 20, 2023 at 4:31 am | #

                  Pretty much.

                  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sqZlDYKE8Pk

                • Chaucer59
                  Chaucer59
                  June 20, 2023 at 8:10 am | #

                  I still prefer Robin Williams’s take: the platypus is proof that God occasionally did weed.

            • Thag Simmons
              Thag Simmons
              June 21, 2023 at 6:35 pm | #

              Lizards and how they fit with reptiles is pretty straightforward I feel. It’s a subgroup nested within a bigger group. The broad strokes aren’t really contested or unclear except for how they relate to Snakes which isn’t really disputed either people just don’t like that Snakes are a type of derived lizard

          • aelfwine
            aelfwine
            June 23, 2023 at 7:04 am | #

            “saur” etymologically stands for lizard, if it had been reptile it would have been something
            related to “herpeto”.

            “Deino” for very bad, terrible, fearsome, etc.

            So “terrible lizard” or “fearsome lizard” would be an okay translation. Not reptile though.

      • Thag Simmons
        Thag Simmons
        June 20, 2023 at 12:36 am | #

        Well, Sir Richard Owen came up with it actually. Because he’s the guy who first named them “Dinosaurs”, which pretty literally translates to terrible lizard

        • Bicycle Bill
          Bicycle Bill
          June 20, 2023 at 1:29 am | #

          I always thought it translated out to ‘thunder lizard’; and dictionary.com says it comes from the Greek for ‘monstrous lizard’.

          • Agemegos
            Agemegos
            June 20, 2023 at 3:00 am | #

            I think it is “brontosaurus” that means “thunder lizard”.

            • Chaucer59
              Chaucer59
              June 20, 2023 at 8:11 am | #

              Yep.

      • Mark
        Mark
        June 20, 2023 at 8:26 am | #

        Well, birds are therapods and lizards, sauropods (obviously), so technically it’s a little muddled, but comedically It Works For Me. [giggle]

    • Proxiehunter
      Proxiehunter
      June 20, 2023 at 12:15 am | #

      Lizbian is a portmanteau of lizard and lesbian. Terrible Lizbians is because Dinosaur can be translated as Terrible Lizard.

    • Illjwamh
      Illjwamh
      June 20, 2023 at 12:23 am | #

      “Dinosaur” literally means “terrible lizard”.

    • Taffy
      Taffy
      June 20, 2023 at 1:02 am | #

      It’s a pun that means Liz is making another appearance soon.

  15. Raen
    Raen
    June 20, 2023 at 12:10 am | #

    Wait, is she making up ship names for her own comic?

    • Jamie
      Jamie
      June 20, 2023 at 12:41 am | #

      Futurewives is exactly as terrible a ship name as I’d expect from Joyce, too.

      • Thomas
        Thomas
        June 20, 2023 at 1:05 am | #

        I think I’ll compromise and stick with Lizardwives. Lesbians or not, treating the eventual marriage of such a recent couple as a sure thing and getting all worked up over it… speaks of a culture in which people marry far too quickly.

        • thejeff
          thejeff
          June 20, 2023 at 8:06 am | #

          It bothers me a bit too, but Becky did announce they were (kind of) engaged and Joyce is excited about that.

          • Mano308gts
            Mano308gts
            June 20, 2023 at 10:02 am | #

            Becky did announce that they were kind of engaged, and Dina has gone along with it, but that’s a weird “kind of engaged” wrapped up in the whole “only have sex with your spouse”, alongside “I love my girlfriend, we must be destined soulmates”.

            Ironically, the most realistic thing would be for them to get into an irreconcilable fight and break up sometime later this semester, a true example of dumbing of age.

            Or have the issue of one of them turning out to be waaaaaaay more into someone else. But, story-wise that can’t happen, since Dina’s the golden girl who can do no wrong, and Becky could get away with murder and be immediately forgiven by everyone. (Yea, she’s probably my least favorite character in the story, because she’s gotten away with a ton of shit without real consequences… And that just ain’t fun in real life.)

            • Taffy
              Taffy
              June 20, 2023 at 11:10 am | #

              Okay so now you’re just outright fucking lying. Dina’s not “the golden girl who can do no wrong”, she literally got half the group killed when they tried to escape Blaine’s weird Airbnb murder basement. Or are we just erasing that scene when it’s convenient for us now?

              • RassilonTDavros
                RassilonTDavros
                June 20, 2023 at 6:09 pm | #

                Never forget the lives lost in Operation Bird Wave.

                • Taffy
                  Taffy
                  June 20, 2023 at 7:49 pm | #

                  It’s just gross how often people conveniently “forget” about that. Like, I get it, the guest author took some strange turns while Willis was in the hospital with Butts Disease (thank Gosh for modern medicine), but it’s still canon. Josh, Todd, Candice, Michelle, Sock, and Yukiko deserve to at least be remembered.

                • Yumi
                  Yumi
                  June 20, 2023 at 7:51 pm | #

                  Fuck Todd, they know what they did.

                • Taffy
                  Taffy
                  June 20, 2023 at 7:57 pm | #

                  Okay, admittedly Todd was incredibly problematic as a character. Their abusive relationship with Michelle was probably the darkest this comic has ever gotten, and I can’t say it really added to the overall story in any way. The scene with the shower curtain still gives me bad dreams, I have to skip that whole chapter.

            • tunasammich
              tunasammich
              June 20, 2023 at 6:51 pm | #

              Everyone always says breaking up is more realistic, but I know tons of people including myself who married someone they met in high school, and marrying someone you started dating in college is even more common

              • Yumi
                Yumi
                June 20, 2023 at 7:01 pm | #

                Yeah, the idea isn’t exactly unrealistic vs realistic… breaking up in a high school or college relationship is more common, certainly, more statistically probable, but it’s not unrealistic for a relationship that starts at that age to last. I could understand people arguing that it might be unrealistic certain characters to last in a relationship because of x, y, z (though there’s almost always counterexamples, which can be part of the issue with arguing “unrealistic”).

                I do agree that this level of “they will get married” at an early stage of a relationship between two young people– both from inside and outside the relationship (but all in the comic)– doesn’t seem great, especially considering the religious background of Becky ad Joyce.

            • Yumi
              Yumi
              June 20, 2023 at 6:51 pm | #

              It’d be interesting– and possibly connected to this story arc– if they talked about it and realized they had different ideas about what marriage is. The idea of “marriage is a promise between you, your partner, and God” (or something like that) is a common enough Christian sentiment. So that could be Becky, whereas Dina’s view might be more like, “Marriage is a legal contract that asserts the status of a relationship.”

              And I do imagine there’s a large overlap between both of them in feelings of love and commitment as related to the idea of marriage, but there could still be those other differences. And it might also impact how binding they view marriage as being.

  16. Dr. T
    Dr. T
    June 20, 2023 at 12:11 am | #

    Inevitable nuptials? How did I miss that conversation?

    • HueSatLight
      HueSatLight
      June 20, 2023 at 12:14 am | #

      It’s when Becky was assuring Joyce being interested in or having sex didn’t make someone impure.

    • Tan
      Tan
      June 20, 2023 at 1:16 am | #

      Becky and Dina discussed it in the immediate aftermath of their first time together: https://www.dumbingofage.com/2022/comic/book-12/03-trial-and-sarah/fivesecond-2/

      Becky later relayed this information to Joyce when they were sorting out their ‘secrets’: https://www.dumbingofage.com/2023/comic/book-13/02-turning-saints-into-the-sea/kindasorta/ and the following strip

      • Opus the Poet
        Opus the Poet
        June 20, 2023 at 7:34 pm | #

        I love Sal’s “Why are all those dogs howlin’?” from that second link.

  17. BBCC
    BBCC
    June 20, 2023 at 12:11 am | #

    Joyce is a good actor. I noticed she didn’t mention mom selling the house to raise money for their old church, their church being broke post-Toedad or telling her mom she’s an atheist.

    And Becky and Dina are very cute but everyone knows that.

    • Thomas
      Thomas
      June 20, 2023 at 12:42 am | #

      Good catch! I think Joyce avoids mentioning those because they’re all upsetting for Becky. Her family’s hpuse was seized by the bank & the other two things are obvious.

      • BBCC
        BBCC
        June 20, 2023 at 2:32 am | #

        Her house wasn’t seized by the bank – she decided to sell it after her dad died. She got the things she wanted (mostly clothes) and nothing else was there for her but ghosts.

        • Thomas
          Thomas
          June 20, 2023 at 2:41 am | #

          I think I (mis)remember the episode where Becky couldn’t enter the house for some reason, which is either Police Line Do Not Cross or Frozen Assets. The point being that Becky doesn’t have a childhood home to go back to either.

          • thejeff
            thejeff
            June 20, 2023 at 8:10 am | #

            Mostly it was just “didn’t have a key”.

          • Mark
            Mark
            June 20, 2023 at 8:38 am | #

            It just struck me that Becky basically didn’t possess any of the basic tools that support independence. No key to her own home. No identity documents — didn’t even know her own Social Security number. No money to speak of. She sorta remarked on this, but it just hit me that her determination was the only asset she had in her own hands. Fortunately for her, she has that in abundance.

            • thejeff
              thejeff
              June 20, 2023 at 11:35 am | #

              Yeah, I remember the comments section back in those days. Lots of “she should know her SSN from applying for jobs” and “why wouldn’t she still have a key to her house?”

              • BBCC
                BBCC
                June 20, 2023 at 1:37 pm | #

                My favourite was “It only costs $20 to get copies of her documents!”

                • Taffy
                  Taffy
                  June 20, 2023 at 5:42 pm | #

                  People really had high hopes for that $20. She was somehow meant to get all her legal documents, food, a place to stay, clothes, toiletries, all that good stuff, but she irresponsibly got her hair cut instead of starting a new life.

                  Maybe if the comic took place in 1805.

                • BBCC
                  BBCC
                  June 20, 2023 at 6:07 pm | #

                  That was a different conversation but good lord yes that one was everywhere too.

                • Taffy
                  Taffy
                  June 20, 2023 at 7:43 pm | #

                  They were separate? I started reading around the time Becky and Dina cut through the trees to escape Toedead, so the conversations got muddled together. It’s weird that there were multiple discussions about how the homeless gay kid should spend her fortune.

          • BBCC
            BBCC
            June 20, 2023 at 2:16 pm | #

            I checked and the problem was that she couldn’t afford to live in it but it hadn’t foreclosed yet.

    • Needfuldoer
      Needfuldoer
      June 20, 2023 at 4:25 am | #

      Those are all things she doesn’t want to think about right now.

  18. DailyBrad
    DailyBrad
    June 20, 2023 at 12:12 am | #

    I love Joyce’s enthusiasm.

  19. RassilonTDavros
    RassilonTDavros
    June 20, 2023 at 12:25 am | #

    R.I.P.* the U.S.S. Hankarol. It hit an iceberg that had a dinosaur in it.

    Efforts to teach said dinosaur to ride a ball have thus far produced mixed results.

    • RassilonTDavros
      RassilonTDavros
      June 20, 2023 at 12:26 am | #

      *what is the proper/official term for sending off a ship that sank, anyway?

      • Thomas
        Thomas
        June 20, 2023 at 12:50 am | #

        I think you salute the sinking ship. “Heave-ho, overboard!” is strictly for people who died at sea.

        • Mark
          Mark
          June 20, 2023 at 8:40 am | #

          I was sure there was something about “that day when the dead shall arise incorruptible.”

  20. Marvelman
    Marvelman
    June 20, 2023 at 12:26 am | #

    “Forget Dorothy”? I suspect that statement is going to come back and bite Joyce.

    • DailyBrad
      DailyBrad
      June 20, 2023 at 6:04 am | #

      Maybe, though I think she is probably just saying it in a sense of “let’s not let that get in the way of our good time”, rather than any acrimony. She’s wanting to bask in her friends’ romantic situation.

      • Marvelman
        Marvelman
        June 20, 2023 at 8:54 pm | #

        What I was getting at was that Joyce automatically assumes Dorothy is fine because she always is.

  21. Raeconteur
    Raeconteur
    June 20, 2023 at 12:27 am | #

    Becky is basically just a giant lesbian flag today and that makes me smile.

    • Taffy
      Taffy
      June 20, 2023 at 1:04 am | #

      I like it! We’ve never seen this look on her before, but I hope it becomes a mainstay.🪱

      • Bruno
        Bruno
        June 20, 2023 at 5:51 am | #

        It is. She’s been dressed like this every time she’s outside since the timeskip.

        • Taffy
          Taffy
          June 20, 2023 at 6:52 am | #

          You can’t prove that. 🎣

      • thakoru
        thakoru
        June 20, 2023 at 8:33 am | #

        She’s had that jacket since the start of the semester. I think this is its first appearance: https://www.dumbingofage.com/2020/comic/book-11/02-look-straight-ahead/blackboards/

        • thakoru
          thakoru
          June 20, 2023 at 8:36 am | #

          Dang it, I just got the “bait” emoji.

          • Taffy
            Taffy
            June 20, 2023 at 8:41 am | #

            Why, whatever could you mean? 😇

  22. brionl
    brionl
    June 20, 2023 at 12:34 am | #

    Lezbosaurus Regina.

    • Laura
      Laura
      June 20, 2023 at 1:25 am | #

      Ooh, I like that one!

  23. Juanoku
    Juanoku
    June 20, 2023 at 12:55 am | #

    Well Joyce recovered quick

  24. Nathan
    Nathan
    June 20, 2023 at 1:07 am | #

    Why “terrible lizbians”? I don’t get it

    • Zero
      Zero
      June 20, 2023 at 1:20 am | #

      Because she’s a fan of “terrible lizards.”

    • Leorale
      Leorale
      June 20, 2023 at 1:21 am | #

      “Dinosaur” can be literally translated as “terrible lizard”. (Apparently not a great translation, but that’s how it’s always written out.)
      Lizards + lesbians = lizbians.
      Terrible lizbians.

      • Thomas
        Thomas
        June 20, 2023 at 2:51 am | #

        The problem is not with the translation, but that dinosaurs as lizards is a misnomer, as we now understand it. (Since they’re birds, obviously.) But “terrible lizard” is still an accurate translation for “deinos sauros”.

        • milu
          milu
          June 20, 2023 at 5:21 am | #

          Then again the way scientific names are assigned is not meant to reflect current knowledge but rather serve as a marker of initial discovery. The aim is for everyone to agree on how we call a species or group, so it makes sense to stick with the earliest descriptor no matter how misguided it may turn out to be.

          This principle is so strictly applied that calls for renaming the beetle Anophthalmus hitleri (and many other similar cases) have been rejected by the International Commission on Zoological Nomenclature.

          • milu
            milu
            June 20, 2023 at 5:35 am | #

            (They’ve also refused to entertain the Turkish government’s demand that species endemic to Turkey with names referencing historically Armenian or Kurdish areas be renamed in accordance with Turkey’s imperialist-genocidal conception of its own history and geography. So you can at least see how their logic functions. Adhering to their principles allows them to make this sort of decision without reference to politics and to insist that they are a pure, ahistorical instance serving no other interest than that of global scientific communication. Which is, obviously, super debatable, but there is an element of dogged coherence to it.)

          • Thomas
            Thomas
            June 20, 2023 at 7:18 am | #

            I don’t know, maybe a visually impaired cave dweller is exactly the right species to name after a fascist who ended up dead in a bunker.

            • Taffy
              Taffy
              June 20, 2023 at 8:30 am | #

              It’s rude to the beetles.

            • milu
              milu
              June 20, 2023 at 10:14 am | #

              It is rude to the beetles, plus neonazis have taken to poach, steal and trade specimens of this fairly rare insect, potentially endangering it.

              Also as i hinted at, this is just one case. Many animals and plants bear the names of slave-owners or colonialists, for instance.

              It’s not a simple problem, frankly. It’s an obvious fact that westerners, taking their Adamic mission to heart, have produced the large majority of the scientific nomenclature that is now touted for its convenient “universality”. But the universality, uh, is actually convenient. So how do we address this historic-epistemic injustice? So far, to my knowledge, by ignoring it.

              • Taffy
                Taffy
                June 20, 2023 at 10:44 am | #

                Why don’t neonazis get a life ffs, like come the fuck on. Collection and poaching a rare bug because it has the name of their dipshit idol in it? Talk about a pack of losers, just real boneheads from start to finish.

                • milu
                  milu
                  June 20, 2023 at 11:38 am | #

                  yeah you would’ve thought, “ok so neonazis are horny for genocide and eugenics and dictatorship, so clearly not a stellar bunch. but surely they’re at least chill with motherfucking BEETLES.”

                • Taffy
                  Taffy
                  June 20, 2023 at 11:52 am | #

                  They probably think they’re really proving some kinda point too, which makes it even dumber.

                • milu
                  milu
                  June 20, 2023 at 12:36 pm | #

                  Honestly, probably not. Even nazis are just dorks sometimes.

                • Taffy
                  Taffy
                  June 20, 2023 at 7:40 pm | #

                  Why ya gotta insult dorks by associating us with that filth? 😢 /joke

          • Pergola
            Pergola
            June 20, 2023 at 12:13 pm | #

            Apatosaurus go away! I want Brontosaurus back!
            ( why cant we have nice things )

            • milu
              milu
              June 20, 2023 at 5:05 pm | #

              no one can stop you from calling apatosaurus brontosaurus! be a rebel

  25. Francoinblanco
    Francoinblanco
    June 20, 2023 at 1:11 am | #

    Wait my catholic brain hit me. How scandalous is a divorce in Joyce’s mom congregation? I mean, the fact that they divorced means that the church allows it, but how much will they be the ones who actually get divorced?

    • Thomas
      Thomas
      June 20, 2023 at 1:40 am | #

      Can’t answer this, but I think since Hank left the church in disgust over their actions, the church will actually have Carol’s back. They’ll blame Hank who actually initiated the divorce, so that checks out. Maybe Carol sold her house to win back her standing in the community?

    • Aslan
      Aslan
      June 20, 2023 at 8:06 am | #

      I imagine the response will be “Hank was weak and couldn’t perform his duty as a father to protect and provide for his family”
      Similarly, I’m sure the divorce will be used as fuel to justify their condemnation of him but I reckon that is HIGHLY contextual

      • Bryy
        Bryy
        June 20, 2023 at 11:42 pm | #

        Yup. Carol’s church is very clearly an Us vs. Them mentality (I mean, that’s the hallmark of any cult). Hank is very likely branded with a scarlet A.

    • Hof1991
      Hof1991
      June 20, 2023 at 8:48 am | #

      Unevenly yoked is a thing for them. You don’t need to remain with an unbeliever since that might harm your faith journey.

  26. Laura
    Laura
    June 20, 2023 at 1:28 am | #

    …Would anyone be up for a question thread?

    Dina’s saurian self-nickname for herself and Becky is “Terrible Lizbians”.

    What would your saurian nickname be? That is to say, if you could pick any nickname for yourself that is related to dinosaurs, lizards, birds, paleontology, or related fields… what would it be?

    • Laura
      Laura
      June 20, 2023 at 1:30 am | #

      My Saurian nickname would be “Healer Monster” (like a “Gila Monster,” only with an aspiration to promote public health)

    • NGPZ
      NGPZ
      June 20, 2023 at 1:37 am | #

      Game Programmasaurolophus, on account that I program games? 😄

      • Laura
        Laura
        June 20, 2023 at 2:42 am | #

        Love it!

    • Thomas
      Thomas
      June 20, 2023 at 4:46 am | #

      Okay, I’ll bite. My nickname would be Thomahawk, which refers both to a bird and uhm… a flint hand axe, which is also an archaeological find!

      • Laura
        Laura
        June 20, 2023 at 8:46 am | #

        Very cool!

    • Chaucer59
      Chaucer59
      June 20, 2023 at 8:20 am | #

      These days? Tardusraptor.

      • Laura
        Laura
        June 20, 2023 at 8:46 am | #

        Ooh, I like it!

    • Opus the Poet
      Opus the Poet
      June 20, 2023 at 7:49 pm | #

      Mine is in my comment handle, plus I guess Aptenodytes forsterious Imperi which is a riff on the scientific name for Emperor Penguins. Which I’m not because they can’t ride bicycles.

      • Laura
        Laura
        June 20, 2023 at 9:39 pm | #

        PERFECT!

    • Bicycle Bill
      Bicycle Bill
      June 21, 2023 at 1:26 am | #

      I figure I’d be either the Cyclosaurus Rex, or a Bicyclodon.
      The second one gives me a chance to shout out “Dodosaurs: The Dinosaurs That Didn’t Make It” – a book of art by Rick Meyerowitz, who used to be with the National Lampoon (he’s the guy who did the art for the poster of ‘Delta House’ for the movie ‘Animal House’).

  27. TulipKitten
    TulipKitten
    June 20, 2023 at 4:43 am | #

    Both of those are better than Dicky.

  28. Raen
    Raen
    June 20, 2023 at 5:25 am | #

    Actually, I’m thinking of a certain web animation where an episode gives “codenames” to five of the six possible pairings of the four main female characters, the unnamed one being half-sisters – that was unsubtle. (Although of the five, the fans came up with different names for two, two never really caught on at all, and the only one that kept its name wound up being canon, oh look, here’s an uncontroversial statement…)

    • Psi baka onna
      Psi baka onna
      June 20, 2023 at 7:22 am | #

      I thought they named some attacks/tactical maneouvers after the fan names for ships in that episode or am I thinking of a different web animation?

      • Raen
        Raen
        June 20, 2023 at 7:56 am | #

        All I know is that two of the three that are actually popular are not the same. (Checkmate/Monochrome, Whiterose/Iceflower). I would say I’m telling on myself, but as David Mitchell said, if for everything I knew I knew where I knew it from, I could only know half as much.

    • Taffy
      Taffy
      June 20, 2023 at 7:49 am | #

      I’m assuming you mean RWBY, and Bumblebee may be canon now, but that doesn’t change that it was blatant queerbait for years. The only decent canon ship is Reader X Willow, anyway.

  29. Suet
    Suet
    June 20, 2023 at 5:49 am | #

    That settles the question whether they want to be respected or feared.

    “Bina”? “Decky”? If anybody actually wants to check if the readers have said such ship names, be our guest, be our guest, put your services to the test

  30. Badgermole
    Badgermole
    June 20, 2023 at 7:42 am | #

    I can’t imagine Dina “speaking” a typo so “nuptuals” is particularly disconcerting.

    • Taffy
      Taffy
      June 20, 2023 at 7:52 am | #

      I had to look the word up to understand what you meant. I’ve only ever heard it pronounced “nuptials”, no matter who said it.

      • Chaucer59
        Chaucer59
        June 20, 2023 at 8:23 am | #

        Really? Maybe it’s regional. Despite knowing the correct spelling, I always hear EVERYONE pronounce nuptials as “nuptuals.”

        • Taffy
          Taffy
          June 20, 2023 at 8:25 am | #

          I checked and double checked that before I posted. It’s meant to say the U version. Nuptuals. U.

        • Yumi
          Yumi
          June 20, 2023 at 10:41 am | #

          Somehow I’ve never thought about it, but yeah, I pronounce it closer to “nuptuals” as well.

          Now I’m wondering about how to respond to kids who might arrive at the “correct” pronunciation when first reading the word. Like, “yes but no (but also yes)”? Man. Language.

          • Regret
            Regret
            June 20, 2023 at 11:10 am | #

            Ahem. English specifically. Many languages have some kind of relationship between letters and sounds. English has none.

            • Taffy
              Taffy
              June 20, 2023 at 11:14 am | #

              Uodtte awr yieau ptahceeng ubbowt?

            • Yumi
              Yumi
              June 20, 2023 at 11:27 am | #

              Eh.

            • Pergola
              Pergola
              June 20, 2023 at 12:23 pm | #

              No, English has several. Take your pick.

            • Opus the Poet
              Opus the Poet
              June 20, 2023 at 7:54 pm | #

              Phonics was a thing when I was teaching my brother how to read, and when I was learning how to read, obviously.

            • drs
              drs
              June 20, 2023 at 10:41 pm | #

              English has plenty of relationship between sound and letter. It’s not as good as Spanish, say, but there’s definitely a lot.

              If there were no relationship, then you would have no guess as to how to say ‘mukuwaddy’, a word I just made up. Yet you do have a guess. Maybe a few guesses, mostly based on the length of the ‘u’s.

        • Mark
          Mark
          June 20, 2023 at 7:16 pm | #

          Her English has been corrupted by spending too much time among folks who speak Hoosier.

          (I’m a Hoosier, so I can say that.)

  31. vulcanodon
    vulcanodon
    June 20, 2023 at 8:20 am | #

    Panel five warms the Earth and makes flowers grow…

    • vulcanodon
      vulcanodon
      June 20, 2023 at 8:26 am | #

      And panel two! Take that, hateful and less rad.

  32. HeatherJean
    HeatherJean
    June 20, 2023 at 8:45 am | #

    I agree that “Bina” and “Decky” should be off the table, but how about “Dinky”?

    • HueSatLight
      HueSatLight
      June 20, 2023 at 11:37 am | #

      Portmanteau relationship names are weird. And to the best of my recollection the trend kicked off when tabloids were invading the privacy of two famous people. Who subsequently called off their engagement and broke up because of it.

  33. Hof1991
    Hof1991
    June 20, 2023 at 8:53 am | #

    Wait. Future wives is the name of a comedy trio. Very fitting for these three.
    https://m.facebook.com/FutureWivesComedy

    • Taffy
      Taffy
      June 20, 2023 at 9:14 am | #

      Oh, I get shit for linking to TV Tropes, but you can link to the website that killed humanity.

      • Yumi
        Yumi
        June 20, 2023 at 10:42 am | #

        Hey, it seems like they’re also getting shit for linking to Facebook.

        Now I feel like I should link to something. Uhhhh…… https://myspace.com/

        • Taffy
          Taffy
          June 20, 2023 at 11:01 am | #

          You made that one up.

        • milu
          milu
          June 20, 2023 at 11:40 am | #

          oh wow it’s still up??? incredible

          • milu
            milu
            June 20, 2023 at 11:42 am | #

            and in the spirit of this thread, here’s a place where you can watch random youtube vids with zero views

  34. Joy
    Joy
    June 20, 2023 at 10:26 am | #

    Joyce continues to be lovable. Also Becky and Dina. Terrible Lizbians…. :3 💙🤍🖤🦓🐱💖😎☯️🙏🍵☺️

  35. Regret
    Regret
    June 20, 2023 at 11:09 am | #

    I love Dina’s sense of humour.

    • NGPZ
      NGPZ
      June 20, 2023 at 4:38 pm | #

      Hehe. Humour? 😈

      • Opus the Poet
        Opus the Poet
        June 20, 2023 at 8:00 pm | #

        A fan of Ruth, obviously.

  36. HueSatLight
    HueSatLight
    June 20, 2023 at 11:46 am | #

    Lucy, within earshot, “what’s passifagress mean?”

  37. Pergola
    Pergola
    June 20, 2023 at 12:24 pm | #

    Joyce attempts ‘hide smile’.
    It is not effective.

  38. bcb
    bcb
    June 20, 2023 at 3:35 pm | #

    Becky really does know how to cheer up Joyce.

  39. APW
    APW
    June 20, 2023 at 9:29 pm | #

    *cultural reference support needed* Is the ship thing a quotation? It sounds like a quotation.

    • Yumi
      Yumi
      June 20, 2023 at 9:49 pm | #

      It technically comes from Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome, I believe, but the reference is wide enough now that people use it separate of the knowledge of where it’s from– “Two men enter, one man leaves.”

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