Jas is a human taken from her home planet on a trip across the galaxy she will never forget.
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Miyuli
Four students summon and study potentially dangerous demons within the walls of the mysterious Summerland University.
Between Failures
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The low stakes adventures of an assorted group of 20 somethings trapped in the declining years of American retail. They are naughty and say lots of swears.
Lighter Than Heir
Melissa Albino
A young Volant woman joins the military in an effort to upstage her war-hero father.
Cyanide & Happiness
Explosm
Satire, dark humor and surreal humor.
Knights Errant
J.R. Doyle
Wilfrid's humble quest for revenge becomes bigger and bloodier by the day.
[un]Divine
Ayme
A highschool senior thought giving up his soul for a demon was a good idea. It wasn't.
Wilde Life
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Oscar decided to rent an old haunted house, and that's when things got weird...
Hazy London
Scotty
A story about messy relationships. From friendly foes to crazy families. Nothing is black and white, just full of color. But, all colors can get a little hazy...
Guilded Age
T Campbell, John Waltrip, Florence Machina
Welcome to the saga of the working-class adventurer! Enjoy the complete story with new annotations daily!
Go Get a Roomie
Clover
Experience the queer journey of an upbeat hippie and the friendships she makes along the way! A tale of self-discovery and love of many forms.
Real Science Adventures
Brian Clevinger
Spin off stories and other adventures from the world of Atomic Robo!
Clockwork
Chikuto
Cog Kleinschmidt is a diligent, quiet worker at the Mercia Fortress, the world power's leading stronghold. His orderly life is thrown into chaos when an enemy kingdom sends a diplomat for peace talks. This diplomat needs something from Cog - whether he agrees to their terms or not!
How to be a Werewolf
Shawn Lenore
Malaya Walters was bitten by a werewolf as a child. After being raised by her human family, she faces the chance to learn what being a werewolf is really like as an adult.
Empowered
Adam Warren
A sexy superhero comedy (except when it isn't) about the never-ending struggles of a plucky but very unlucky young superheroine.
Killjoys
Flatw00ds
When two disgraced ex-feds fall backwards into trouble with the clown mafia, getting out in one piece is gonna be no joke!
The Witch Door
Anni K.
Katariina Lehto discovers her neighbor is a witch called Jousia Muotka. Jousia introduces Katariina to the strange people and places beyond the witch door...
Girl Genius
Phil Foglio, Kaja Foglio
In a time when the Industrial Revolution has become an all-out war, Mad Science rules the World...with mixed success.
Come Hell or High Water
Jenny/Star, Mori
Prince Gladimir was never meant to fall for a pirate. Swearing off love for duty, the threat of war propels him back into the Captain’s world of high seas and high stakes. Their relationship could be the thing to save the kingdom of Yvoire - or destroy it.
Atomic Robo
Brian Clevinger, Scott Wegener
The robot punches monsters and bad robots and one time he was a cowboy.
Monster Pulse
Magnolia Porter Siddell
Four kids run afoul of a creepy secret organization's experiments, which turn their body parts into fighting monsters. Part sentimental coming-of-age story, part monster-training shonen manga, with just a bit of sci-fi body horror.
Awaken
Koti Saavedra/Flipfloppery
Superpowers, monsters and conspiracies. Piras, the spoiled Dameschi heir, fights to recover his identity after becoming a terrorist!
Demon's Mirror
Harry Bogosian
Based loosely off of "The Snow Queen", a story by Hans Christian Andersen, we see things take a different turn as the demons become central characters, and the side characters stick around. Yup, that's the only differences. Enjoy!
No End
Erli, Kromi
A queer romance about people attempting to build lives in a cold, post-apocalyptic world ravaged by hordes of undead.
Whomp!
Ronnie
A depressed, portly, hirsute anime fan stumbles through life in the ever-pursuit of chicken nuggets and other life-shortening indulgences.
The Otherknown
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Chandra is a 12-year-old accidental time traveler with a reluctant new dad, who happens to be a member of a feared galactic crime syndicate.
Heart of Gold
Eliot Baum, Viv Tanner
A pianist with failing eyesight seeks out a priest with a miraculous healing touch, drawing him deeper into a world of miracles and curses.
Dumbing of Age
David M Willis
Joyce has been homeschooled her entire life until now, when she's suddenly a freshman in college! Things don't go well.
Nerf Now!!
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A cute webcomic about fanservice, video games, and... love. Mostly video games, though.
Paint the Town Red
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Countdown to Countdown
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Iris Black is a self-proclaimed inventor with the curious ability to bring his drawings to life, and yearns to find a space where he can use his powers freely.
2 Slices
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After a case of mistaken identity, will awkward Daisuke find help from excitable Mamo, or will his love life be thrown completely off track?
Far to the North
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Sunshine Boy
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New-kid Kelly is sweet but naive. Luckily, he's got his outgoing neighbor Grey in his corner.
Sam & Fuzzy
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Troubled by gangster rodents, lovesick vampire stalkers, or confused ninja assassins? Don't panic! Sam and Fuzzy are here to help. (For a reasonable fee.)
The Lonely Vincent Bellingham
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Vincent is an unkind man looking to disappear, and finds himself in the care of a vampire and her two wicked children.
Fairmeadow
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A wayward soldier finds herself in a pacifist commune deep in the wilderness of a war-weary land. Living in isolation brings her closer to those she was sworn to kill than she could ever imagine - but also threatens to tear the place apart.
Spinnerette
Krazy Krow, Rocio Zucchi, Pablo Rey
When a lab accident gives Heather Brown spider powers and six arms, she does what any midwest comic geek would do: Become Ohio's #3 superhero!
Anacrine Complex
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A superhuman heist involving probably too many pigeons than entirely necessary.
Folklore
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A superhuman horror story focused on a small band of survivors trying to navigate a war-torn world in the aftermath of the Federation’s collapse.
Obelisk
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In 1908 New York, a young woman struggles to put her life back together in the wake of her father's death - until she discovers a vampire in the shambles of her inheritance.
Wychwood
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When Tiara's pyrokinesis is finally noticed, she is captured by a magical research organization for study. If she cooperates, she could be helping to save humanity from a dire threat - but can she trust them?
Goblins
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A fantasy RPG as told through the eyes of the low-level monsters.
El Goonish Shive
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WARNING: This comic often ignores the Laws of Physics
Drugs & Wires
Mary Safro, Io Black
Dan used to be a VR operator until his brain got fried by malware. Now he's stuck delivering packages in a post-Soviet hellhole all while trying to adjust to his new life and find some answers.
Tove
Severin
The end of the world is coming, and Tove doesn't want to be a hero, but SOMEONE has to look after her little brother.
MASKLESS
kickingshoes
In a world where people can wield the magic of elemental Masks, all Ashe wants to do is help. Maskless and useless, with dreams of fire and smoke on the back of his tongue, he finds himself on a strange, dangerous path to uncovering the secrets of these incredible objects, and the source of the monsters plaguing his home.
Solstoria
Angelica Maria
After her brother goes missing, Samantha vows to become a Knight and help those around her in the Kingdom of St. Helena.
Lunar Blight
Studio CARTRIDGE, Laura Lee
Lunar Blight is a gothic horror story about an elite knight serving a moon cult who must choose between upholding his honoured duty or condemning everything he’s grown to know.
Patrik the Vampire
Bree Paulsen
Patrik loves to knit, bake, and help his friends while dealing with his own demons... like his thirst for blood because, oh yeah--he's a vampire.
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I’m more hoping for the *children* call out parents arc. But as long as someone is doing it, I’m here for it.
Doing my best, which ain’t very good, but I’m also here for the day when my kids call me out. Not for the little shit (they already do), but for whatever big shit I’m fucking them up with.
Kids are at a big disadvantage in calling out their parents. The biases that shape your reactions form during childhood, and they take priority in the brain’s order of operations.
If it’s a threatening situation (like parents withholding love or your carnal desires pointing you toward damnation), then the pattern recognition center of the brain takes a shortcut to the action center, only deigning to inform the frontal lobe milliseconds later. The vision processing center at the back of the brain gets the signal even later, which explains why tunnel vision and hesitation often come at such moments.
Danny doesn’t have a lifetime of reinforcement of the danger of standing up to the Walkertons, so it’s a monumentally lower hurdle to clear. Of course, that means when the children call out parents, its more of a triumphal breakthrough for their authentic lives.
In fairness on this one, I’ve seen FAR more white guys with multiple piercings and snakes for pets than black guys. That’s more on the “Our daughter is with a rebellious crowd, so her bringing a white-bread boyfriend is… unexpected.”
makes me wonder if sal’s brought boys home specifically to piss off her parents tho i wonder if Jen would still be considered ‘favorable’ in their eyes if they saw her drunk issues and all, other than her own parents covering it up i’m sure a ‘head cheerleader getting drunk and cashing’ would be a huge local scandal
Joke’s on them. The student with the 16 nose rings and the pet cobra, Guillaume, wants to remain a virgin until he’s married. Unlike Danny, who had kinky sex with the local superheroine.
That’s an unfair comparison. Most things are better than that stupid-ass miniseries. I’m sure it’s got some very interesting ideas, but “hur hur radioactive spider-cum” isn’t one of them.
If Superman is anything like Hancock (i.e. the main character of that Will Smith superhero movie from 2008, for the uninitiated), that still wouldn’t save her.
Which is frankly nonsense. Being a fictional character from a fictional species the writers are free to write sex with Superman as safe. Frankly I suspect his powers are variable, or anyone who ran into him would be injured because of his invulnerability. I suspect that essay says more about Larry Niven than it does about Superman.
Yeah, the “woman of kleenex” thing has always been nonsense.
Does Superman accidentally rip doors off the hinges everywhere he goes? When he saves people, do their limbs get torn off? Does every criminal he punches land in the next zip code?
No, because while he possesses incredible strength, he’s also capable of not using it all the time.
I mean, I’m no kryptonian, but I’m a person of normal strength and would thus be perfectly capable of hurting someone if I used it indiscriminately. And yet I am able to engage in intimacy with a fellow human without leaving them covered in bruises.
Notice how Charles at least managed to sound happily surprised as opposed to Linda just saying she can live with it? Like, I’m not happy with Charles either but if he’s not actually trying, he’s at least pretending to try.
I have the distinct impression that Charles is easily swayed and, absent Linda’s much stronger influence, could easily be influenced into more supportive behavior. His behavior towards Sal is still quite bad, but he’s much more personable and seems to consistently make a slightly stronger effort to reach out (whereas Linda always just shuts Sal down out the gate).
However, he is unfortunately paired with Linda, and as the old saying goes, “he’s not evil, but when he gets close to it, he picks up its flavor. Like a mushroom or something.”
It’s fascinating to see how the evil parents work in Willis-land. Unless I’m missing something, if the evil parents are a couple, the mothers are always worse (Linda, Carol, Naomi), while the fathers are weak and go along with it, with the exception of Hank, who shows some potential for growth. Meanwhile, the overtly evil father figures (Blaine, Toedad, Sir) are all single at this point. (Not that Blaine wasn’t evil back when he and Stacy were together, but you get what I mean.)
Interesting point, but unless I have missed a page (very possible), Blaine was not single when we last saw him alive. He was in couple with Faz’s mom. She’s… far, far, far from perfect, but she was less evil than Blaine.
Blaine beat Stacey. Toedad most likely contributed to Becky’s mother committing suicide (and may have hit her… He didn’t seem remorseful about slapping Becky, apparently they grew up with hitting kids with spoons for misbehaving being normalised…).
Linda is mainly awful to Sal. Carol wasn’t awful towards Hank (and a lot of her worst prejudices and toxicities would have been hidden to him by his own religious prejudices and inflexibilities until he took the step backwards and realised he’d mistaken being righteous for being a good person. He was willing to step back and think where she doubled down… He grew as a person. She sold her house to support her church financially because it might lose the auditorium as a result of its culpability in her daughter being kidnapped and her daughter’s friend being murdered…).
Naomi… Again mainly awful to her son that we’ve seen (what was the quote? “I didn’t stop loving you. You just became a disappointment”?) but also Amber… But also possibly Ethan’s dad is gay and in serious denial (“sex can be like beer: horrible but you need to have it til you don’t hate it any more”) and can’t leave her because then his whole life and identity will unravel and who will he even have left to be?
So the dads were kinda single for a reason. Now Hank’s seen how crappy Linda can be and how dismissive of people’s pain, lives, etc, and what she can twist into “but religion says so, so you’re wrong” – she is single.
It’s repeating with Raidah that guy. Perhaps in Willis’ schema of relationships, one person is stronger than the other, and strong+evil men are so selfish they drive off women, while strong+evil women can control their ‘partners’. But what would weak evil look like? Charles is pretty much all I can imagine. Or maybe my idea of strong is skewed. Or, without evil, I don’t feel the need to figure out who’s to blame for the evil, and is therefore stronger.
crimes aside maybe she was a daddy’s girl before all that, or just more understanding of her and marcie’s situation, but in most of the flashbacks most of the arguing/animosity was aimed towards the mom
tho i imagine neither of them would expect it to be too long term, it’d def be more eye-raising for someone to be introduced as like a ‘fiancee’ (seems a bit quick tho i’m sure it happens, other than marrying richer some ppl tend to get married out of hihg school/college)
If I were a betting queer, I’d put money on Linda being generally mean and judgemental while pretending she’s not, and Charles generally refusing to engage with the situation in any useful way.
I thought “taking that bet” meant that you were on the opposite end of it? IE, you bet that it isn’t Linda being mean and judgemental, and Charles engaging with the situation?
If this sends anyone else on a pop-punk/emo/what-the-fuck-ever genre spiral as well, you’re welcome. I’ll be listening to The Academy Is… for the next day or three.
That’s the one. Knew it immediately upon reading what Willis wrote.
Don’t think he fits Sal’s vibe but it gave me a good laugh, thanks Willis and thank ya Schpoonman for posting the link
What’s that spot where she wanted to meet? The chapel?
Charles is being nice. Linda made clear at the outset (when they first arrived) that Sal was not invited for lunch. The “It’s a swerve, but I can readjust” is kind of cautiously joking, in case the young man behind Sal might be watching and judging them.
You know what? He never gets a pass, even if he’s not actively being awful. Because he’s *always* enabling Linda.
It’s not like he doesn’t know who he married. Total strangers know that she’s a bad parent to both her kids. She’s not subtle. And he just lets it happen.
Ok, I googled it (the song was the first result, and in fact most of the results) but it looks like the brand still exists. Mennen used to advertise a lot more back in the 90s though, so unless you’re a teenage girl, or someone who remembers the 90s, you may not know what it is.
Yeah, the story goes that someone from Nirvana overheard the phrase “smells like teen spirit” in a department store, loved the imagery it conjures, and went home to write a song around the idea. After the album was recorded, he was furious to find out that it was literally just a perfume scent.
There’s a whole story behind it, I don’t remember all the details but basically someone wrote on a bathroom stall something like “Kirk smells like Teen Spirit”, implying that Kirk Cobain was banging this one particular girl that always smelled like Teen Spirit deodorant. I guess it was sort of like axe body spray before that was a thing.
I’m hoping he Dannys it up in a way similar to how Joe Dannied up meeting Joyce’s mom: blurting out something that sort of ruins the conversation but that also defends and validates his girlfriend.
So my guess is they’re going to think they’re being subtle with their prejudice, but they won’t be and it’ll be Danny that calls them on it before Sal gets a chance to
Yeah that’s plausible. Danny is tactless to a fault, literally. He may not even realize he’s doing it, although he’s also perfectly capable of justified indignation. I just hope neither leads him to saying something Sal would prefer remain unsaid.
This is my hope. I’m not holding out for Danny to solve their racism forever, but there’s definitely some potential for him to be near-oblivious and not quite pick up on what’s going on.
Then again, we’ve seen him catch on to the situation and deploy his Strategic Balls Reserve to protect his last girlfriend — we may just see him do the same here!
Does Danny know about their racism? Because if not, I could see them saying something racist (that they think is subtle), and Danny thinks they’re being ironic or joking or something, and is like, “Yeah, can you believe some people actually think that.”
Step 1: like you said. Step 2: it goes on and Danny realizes they mean it; Step 3: he plays into the clueless attitude from Step 1 and won’t give it up. Linda is seething; Charles is thoughtful; Sal realizes that this approach is just as satisfying as open rebellion and begins to follow Danny’s lead.
i’m still waiting on him to say “yeah one of my exes is the girl that stabbed your daughters hand and she still treats sal better *currently* than you do” or something like that
Hmm. I fall more on the “inadvertently” side of the scale, but I’ll be interested to see if residual guilt from how he was taken in by Blaine ends up playing a role. (Which, now that I think of it, makes for an interesting parallel with Dina, the other person in this comic defined by a hat.) In that I’m pretty sure he’s got past the “You’re the grown-up, so I think I -have- to agree with you?” line he had back when Blaine was manipulating him.
i’d would’ve thought linda would be fine if it’s like, “Anyone but marcie” , i’d imagine they’d have issues with it if they shipped her off to a catholic school and not just a strict boarding school unless all boarding schools are under some religious organizatoin
This is where I would normally say “oh no, someone is reacting to the persona Sal projects exactly as if it were true”, but even I acknowledge that said persona is a reaction to this behavior from her parents, not the catalyst.
i mean given her “cool/doesn’t care attitude” thematically it would be fitting for her to have some kinda ‘cringefail’ dorky boyfriend because she doesn’t rly care how she’s perceived (tho even with some ‘dorky’ traits danny’s been pretty good overall)
but other than after the first family weekend on campus i’d think before that she presented herself as a ‘reformed catholic schoolgirl’ to her parents
I think it involes standing in rivers and foraging for fish & tubers, although at this point in comic flying south for the winter might also be the most casual thing to do…
Y’know. I actually fell off this webcomic a few years back. Not for any negative reason, I just lost track. Completely randomly for no reason at all as far as I can tell, my brain said “Huh. Wonder what’s goin on with Dumbing Of Age. It’s been a while. What are those kids up to, who’s dating who at this point?”
Alright well. Guess it’s time to get all caught up.
So Amber and Becky had evil dads. Joyce and Sal (and Walky) have evil moms, though not quite as dramatically so. I wonder which pair each has the “family disappointment” uncles. Dorothy and Booster, maybe?
So, in the broadest, most forgiving sense, I can understand Charles’ response. It’s been almost a year since Sal started, and she was a lot more of a rebel figure at the start of DoA. Admittedly, it’s not like they tried to be a part of her life this past year, even after the shooting, kidnapping and everything. I could justify their ignorance if it wasn’t fueled by their apathy.
Imagine the “how did you two meet” story
“We started playing a video game because Danny thought I was the alter ego of his vigilante girlfriend but it turned out she was actually the girl who stabbed me. Then he helped me to not fail math by being a better teacher than my TA and probably my professor.”
Damn, if Danny and Sal weren’t monogamist and DannyXEthan hadn’t been shot in the foot, we could’ve had, “This is my boyfriend, Danny, and this is Danny’s boyfriend, Ethan.”
I know she’s talked about dating guys her parents haven’t approved of, but I wonder how many that actually was, and how many her parents actually knew about?
By which I’m saying I wonder if Sal didn’t actually date many edgy boys (or if they were all edgy, not that many in general), and her parents have consistently assumed this about her.
I feel like the difference between her parents is:
Charles: It’s too bad Sal has never been as easy of a child as Walky, and that she’s made such poor choices for no reason I could possibly imagine. Guess she’s always going to be that way and there’s nothing I could have done.
Linda: It’s too bad Sal’s my daughter. I’ve known something was off with her ever since she started growing all that unruly hair.
"Calarts Style" is the "woke" of shitty cartoonists
Doesn't really mean anything other than "I don't like it, but I'm going to pretend my objection is moral/cultural to make it feel important"
David M Willis!@damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 9h
i wake up
everything's calarts style
this rug is calarts style
your face is calarts style
the sky is calarts style
the increasing crescendo of calarts style from beneath the floorboards, i can hear its symphony whispering to me its awful refrain:
"get something real to hate"
i wake up
everything's calarts style
this rug is calarts style
your face is calarts style
the sky is calarts style
the increasing crescendo of calarts style from beneath the floorboards, i can hear its symphony whispering to me its awful refrain:
"get something real to hate"
Having left wing beliefs is hard because you have to listen to different types of people and give up saying slurs and read articles all the way through, wouldn’t you rather just watch youtube shorts of bald podcasters and believe any old bullshit
i need money and have a flintstone cel i do not want. if you need a flintsone cel and have money you do not want, please click here, thank you
ebay.us/m/XdPL0q
if you're ever sad alone silently, consider this:
- i hold a copyright on being like that
- you are encroaching on my intellectual property
- i will send you a cease & desist
- i will possibly take you to court
so please make yourself legally distinct by talking to someone about it
Take the fictional character quiz and post the first four you know: openpsychometrics.org/tests/charac...
What this should tell you is that I'm always down to cause chaos and good trouble
Would you like to take a survey? Do you like to eat beans? Do you like George Wendt? Would you like to eat beans with George Wendt? Would you like to watch a movie about George Wendt eating beans?
so i'm thinking, okay, i took some extra photos of this set of doors this year so i could draw some other angles, it's an important set of doors, so let's pull up my new reference photos...
....and do you see a problem, do you see an issue
Well, Lizard is here, and I've been telling myself for... years that I'd take down my Endgame shelf and put up Spider-Man:No Way Home once the final villain was out.
So.
That's a thing I gotta do.
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 9h
cait (and adonis) @cait.bsky.social ⋅ 17h
Alina Pete @alinapete.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
Sean Thomason @seanthomason.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
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Barb O. Saur 
⚧️
“see if you can subtlely pull off if there’s a face mask”
“I don’t think that’s a thing that does subtle?”
“Whoops, I tripped and accidentally grabbed your nose on the way down. Hmmm, that’s on there pretty good.”
(Later)
“Whoops, I tripped again, this time while holding a bucket of glue-dissolving solvent.”
Never has a username seemed so apropos to the comment.
No mom. No dad. He’s real, and he’s spectacular.
…
Which is more than can be said about you two.
(I’m calling them a couple of boobs. Not the good kind.)
It begins.
Fortunately it seems that Danny left the banjo at home.
Good move.
Ukelele?
Tomato, potato
It’s potahto tomahto!
I mean, the ukulele made him look even whiter, that might’ve been a plus.
Banjolele
I hope she gets called out as racist sooner or later.
Walky was right when he said
“Youve never given her a reason to stay”
I firmly believe this is the Boyfriends Call Out Mothers arc.
Here’s hoping!
I’m more hoping for the *children* call out parents arc. But as long as someone is doing it, I’m here for it.
Doing my best, which ain’t very good, but I’m also here for the day when my kids call me out. Not for the little shit (they already do
), but for whatever big shit I’m fucking them up with.
Kids are at a big disadvantage in calling out their parents. The biases that shape your reactions form during childhood, and they take priority in the brain’s order of operations.
If it’s a threatening situation (like parents withholding love or your carnal desires pointing you toward damnation), then the pattern recognition center of the brain takes a shortcut to the action center, only deigning to inform the frontal lobe milliseconds later. The vision processing center at the back of the brain gets the signal even later, which explains why tunnel vision and hesitation often come at such moments.
Danny doesn’t have a lifetime of reinforcement of the danger of standing up to the Walkertons, so it’s a monumentally lower hurdle to clear. Of course, that means when the children call out parents, its more of a triumphal breakthrough for their authentic lives.
In fairness on this one, I’ve seen FAR more white guys with multiple piercings and snakes for pets than black guys. That’s more on the “Our daughter is with a rebellious crowd, so her bringing a white-bread boyfriend is… unexpected.”
“I can readjust,” says Linda, her eye visibly twitching.
I can see why you think her eye is twitching, but I think that’s just old people wrinkles. There’s a line under her eye in the last panel too
But the grimace is noticeable there too.
(In panel 2, I mean)
She’s definitely having a hard time but she seems to be trying to make a polite, welcoming smile.
It’s her daughter, she shouldn’t have to try. She should be grateful Sal even talks to her.
Para bailar La Bongo
La Bongo supremo
Se necessita una poca de gracia
Una poca de gracia
Good luck Sal. You deserve better.
Bloody punk rockers! if my son was punk rocker I scorn him I would!
Star Trek 4 guy on the bus
I was picturing Hobie from the recent Spider-Verse movie.
…Honestly, he and Sal would probably be good friends.
Hobie is fucking awesome.
Kirk Thatcher! One Jim Henson’s top puppeteers
Loved his reprise in season two of “Picard”.
Racist or not, the ‘rents’ response is perfect.
I think even Sal would go “…yeah, that’s fair…” :D.
makes me wonder if sal’s brought boys home specifically to piss off her parents tho i wonder if Jen would still be considered ‘favorable’ in their eyes if they saw her drunk issues and all, other than her own parents covering it up i’m sure a ‘head cheerleader getting drunk and cashing’ would be a huge local scandal
There’s no way they’d be unaware of Jennifer’s DUI.
They’d excuse it, but they know about it.
Lets not give racists a leg up.
“Be an asshole, but don’t look like you’re being an asshole.”
I don’t know, asshole casually!
clap-clap-clap
I knew it. I’m surrounded by assholes.
*thunk*
Keep firing, Assholes!
*plays Eric Clapton’s “Wonderful Tonight” from a passing car’s audio system*
Joke’s on them. The student with the 16 nose rings and the pet cobra, Guillaume, wants to remain a virgin until he’s married. Unlike Danny, who had kinky sex with the local superheroine.
Honestly, sex with most superheroes has at least an element of kink.
Actual page from a 90s Spider-Man comic book.
Dubcon with Spidey, wasn’t quite anticipating that, but here we are.
This comment section never fails to be educational.
Luckily, frantic screaming is actually just their safeword. All fully above-board.
… I know it’s supposed to be playful and it’s never just been kids reading comics, but kids struggle with nuance. I dislike this.
Not good, but still not as bad as the storyline where MJ died of cancer of the lady parts due to repeated exposure to Pete’s radioactive Spider-jizz.
That’s an unfair comparison. Most things are better than that stupid-ass miniseries. I’m sure it’s got some very interesting ideas, but “hur hur radioactive spider-cum” isn’t one of them.
It goes beyond kink. I never bought into the idea of Superman and Lois Lane. He’d have gutted her like a fish.
Clearly she tops him and he lets her do all the work.
If Superman is anything like Hancock (i.e. the main character of that Will Smith superhero movie from 2008, for the uninitiated), that still wouldn’t save her.
Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex
Which is frankly nonsense. Being a fictional character from a fictional species the writers are free to write sex with Superman as safe. Frankly I suspect his powers are variable, or anyone who ran into him would be injured because of his invulnerability. I suspect that essay says more about Larry Niven than it does about Superman.
Yeah, the “woman of kleenex” thing has always been nonsense.
Does Superman accidentally rip doors off the hinges everywhere he goes? When he saves people, do their limbs get torn off? Does every criminal he punches land in the next zip code?
No, because while he possesses incredible strength, he’s also capable of not using it all the time.
I mean, I’m no kryptonian, but I’m a person of normal strength and would thus be perfectly capable of hurting someone if I used it indiscriminately. And yet I am able to engage in intimacy with a fellow human without leaving them covered in bruises.
Yeah, but that’s controlled movement or learned reflex. An orgasm is incredibly hard to learn how to control, I suspect.
Not that I think you’re wrong; just that it’s a bit less likely. More likely. Whatever.
Those guys tend to be either the most chill guys ever or even more awful than some bigoted parents despite the ‘punk’ look
The worst. THE. WORST.
Notice how Charles at least managed to sound happily surprised as opposed to Linda just saying she can live with it? Like, I’m not happy with Charles either but if he’s not actually trying, he’s at least pretending to try.
I have the distinct impression that Charles is easily swayed and, absent Linda’s much stronger influence, could easily be influenced into more supportive behavior. His behavior towards Sal is still quite bad, but he’s much more personable and seems to consistently make a slightly stronger effort to reach out (whereas Linda always just shuts Sal down out the gate).
However, he is unfortunately paired with Linda, and as the old saying goes, “he’s not evil, but when he gets close to it, he picks up its flavor. Like a mushroom or something.”
It’s fascinating to see how the evil parents work in Willis-land. Unless I’m missing something, if the evil parents are a couple, the mothers are always worse (Linda, Carol, Naomi), while the fathers are weak and go along with it, with the exception of Hank, who shows some potential for growth. Meanwhile, the overtly evil father figures (Blaine, Toedad, Sir) are all single at this point. (Not that Blaine wasn’t evil back when he and Stacy were together, but you get what I mean.)
Interesting point, but unless I have missed a page (very possible), Blaine was not single when we last saw him alive. He was in couple with Faz’s mom. She’s… far, far, far from perfect, but she was less evil than Blaine.
Blaine beat Stacey. Toedad most likely contributed to Becky’s mother committing suicide (and may have hit her… He didn’t seem remorseful about slapping Becky, apparently they grew up with hitting kids with spoons for misbehaving being normalised…).
Linda is mainly awful to Sal. Carol wasn’t awful towards Hank (and a lot of her worst prejudices and toxicities would have been hidden to him by his own religious prejudices and inflexibilities until he took the step backwards and realised he’d mistaken being righteous for being a good person. He was willing to step back and think where she doubled down… He grew as a person. She sold her house to support her church financially because it might lose the auditorium as a result of its culpability in her daughter being kidnapped and her daughter’s friend being murdered…).
Naomi… Again mainly awful to her son that we’ve seen (what was the quote? “I didn’t stop loving you. You just became a disappointment”?) but also Amber… But also possibly Ethan’s dad is gay and in serious denial (“sex can be like beer: horrible but you need to have it til you don’t hate it any more”) and can’t leave her because then his whole life and identity will unravel and who will he even have left to be?
So the dads were kinda single for a reason. Now Hank’s seen how crappy Linda can be and how dismissive of people’s pain, lives, etc, and what she can twist into “but religion says so, so you’re wrong” – she is single.
It’s repeating with Raidah that guy. Perhaps in Willis’ schema of relationships, one person is stronger than the other, and strong+evil men are so selfish they drive off women, while strong+evil women can control their ‘partners’. But what would weak evil look like? Charles is pretty much all I can imagine. Or maybe my idea of strong is skewed. Or, without evil, I don’t feel the need to figure out who’s to blame for the evil, and is therefore stronger.
crimes aside maybe she was a daddy’s girl before all that, or just more understanding of her and marcie’s situation, but in most of the flashbacks most of the arguing/animosity was aimed towards the mom
tho i imagine neither of them would expect it to be too long term, it’d def be more eye-raising for someone to be introduced as like a ‘fiancee’ (seems a bit quick tho i’m sure it happens, other than marrying richer some ppl tend to get married out of hihg school/college)
But it’s also Charles who starts with the “she can’t really mean Danny” bit.
If I were a betting queer, I’d put money on Linda being generally mean and judgemental while pretending she’s not, and Charles generally refusing to engage with the situation in any useful way.
I’d take that bet
I thought “taking that bet” meant that you were on the opposite end of it? IE, you bet that it isn’t Linda being mean and judgemental, and Charles engaging with the situation?
Yup, seems likely.
The only “Snakes on a Plane” music video I can conjure is the video for Cobra Starship’s “Bring it!”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A1wMyKQ6jUg
If this sends anyone else on a pop-punk/emo/what-the-fuck-ever genre spiral as well, you’re welcome. I’ll be listening to The Academy Is… for the next day or three.
That’s the one. Knew it immediately upon reading what Willis wrote.
Don’t think he fits Sal’s vibe but it gave me a good laugh, thanks Willis and thank ya Schpoonman for posting the link
SO KISS ME GOODBYEEEEE
HONEY I’M GONNA MAKE IT OUT ALIVE
KISS ME GOODBYEEEEEEE
I CAN SEE THE DEVIL IN YOUR EYES
*furious headbanging*
I have not thought about this video in at least 15 years. Bravo to Willis.
What’s that spot where she wanted to meet? The chapel?
Charles is being nice. Linda made clear at the outset (when they first arrived) that Sal was not invited for lunch. The “It’s a swerve, but I can readjust” is kind of cautiously joking, in case the young man behind Sal might be watching and judging them.
In case they need to do an emergency exorcism, ‘natch.
Looks like the Sample Gates.
Got it. Thank you for the reference, Mark!
They are the worst, both of them.
Yeah, Linda’s worse, but Charles doesn’t get a pass, he’s definitely being shitty in the last panel, too.
You know what? He never gets a pass, even if he’s not actively being awful. Because he’s *always* enabling Linda.
It’s not like he doesn’t know who he married. Total strangers know that she’s a bad parent to both her kids. She’s not subtle. And he just lets it happen.
Sure, but in that last panel, he’s not just enabling. He’s not just letting it happen. He’s doing it himself.
Oh, don’t let his appearance fool you. Danny can play smells like teen spirit on that Ukulele.
Does Mennen even make Teen Spirit any more? Does Danny even know what it is?
Ok, I googled it (the song was the first result, and in fact most of the results) but it looks like the brand still exists. Mennen used to advertise a lot more back in the 90s though, so unless you’re a teenage girl, or someone who remembers the 90s, you may not know what it is.
…It was a perfume? Holy shit.
Yeah, the story goes that someone from Nirvana overheard the phrase “smells like teen spirit” in a department store, loved the imagery it conjures, and went home to write a song around the idea. After the album was recorded, he was furious to find out that it was literally just a perfume scent.
Deodorant, I thought, no?
Not quite. It was his girlfriend’s deodorant, and a friend wrote that he smelled like it.
There’s a whole story behind it, I don’t remember all the details but basically someone wrote on a bathroom stall something like “Kirk smells like Teen Spirit”, implying that Kirk Cobain was banging this one particular girl that always smelled like Teen Spirit deodorant. I guess it was sort of like axe body spray before that was a thing.
Kurt?
Yeah I meant Kurt, I just messed up his name.
In fairness Captain Kirk may well have tried to sleep with the same girl, should they have gone back in time to the same year…
Kathleen Hanna of Bikini Kill was apparently the one who wrote the graffito on Kurt’s basement wall.
Youtuber 12tone fully covered this a while back before dissecting the song in this video.
♪ Byyyyy Mennen! ♪
(Or maybe they were saying “buy” instead of “by.” Either would work, I guess.)
16 nose rings is a mosaic.
A nose-aic?
Ironically the previous guy she “dated” (if it could be called that) was Jason, who is even more “whitish” and straight laced than Danny.
But see he’s British, not American.
They hooked up but it wasn’t a relationship. They didn’t even get along.
And he was Sal’s TA, which warrants parental disapproval.
Glad Charles went from ‘passively prejudiced’ to ‘whisperingly open prejudiced’.
Danny will Danny this up, but the question is in what way will he Danny this up?
I’m hoping he Dannys it up in a way similar to how Joe Dannied up meeting Joyce’s mom: blurting out something that sort of ruins the conversation but that also defends and validates his girlfriend.
Sorry I accidently flagged you! I meant to reply. But this. 10/10. Might be easier for him too since he actively dislikes their golden child.
Damn, Walkertons, have a little faith in her!
I am not anticipating this going well. Out of the two, if one is gonna come around, my money says Charles.
i just watched the snakes on a plane video yesterday. thanks willis, i’m glad we as a people refuse to let that meme die.
So my guess is they’re going to think they’re being subtle with their prejudice, but they won’t be and it’ll be Danny that calls them on it before Sal gets a chance to
Yeah that’s plausible. Danny is tactless to a fault, literally. He may not even realize he’s doing it, although he’s also perfectly capable of justified indignation. I just hope neither leads him to saying something Sal would prefer remain unsaid.
This is my hope. I’m not holding out for Danny to solve their racism forever, but there’s definitely some potential for him to be near-oblivious and not quite pick up on what’s going on.
Then again, we’ve seen him catch on to the situation and deploy his Strategic Balls Reserve to protect his last girlfriend — we may just see him do the same here!
Does Danny know about their racism? Because if not, I could see them saying something racist (that they think is subtle), and Danny thinks they’re being ironic or joking or something, and is like, “Yeah, can you believe some people actually think that.”
Step 1: like you said. Step 2: it goes on and Danny realizes they mean it; Step 3: he plays into the clueless attitude from Step 1 and won’t give it up. Linda is seething; Charles is thoughtful; Sal realizes that this approach is just as satisfying as open rebellion and begins to follow Danny’s lead.
i’m still waiting on him to say “yeah one of my exes is the girl that stabbed your daughters hand and she still treats sal better *currently* than you do” or something like that
That would be glorious chaos and I love it
Hmm. I fall more on the “inadvertently” side of the scale, but I’ll be interested to see if residual guilt from how he was taken in by Blaine ends up playing a role. (Which, now that I think of it, makes for an interesting parallel with Dina, the other person in this comic defined by a hat.) In that I’m pretty sure he’s got past the “You’re the grown-up, so I think I -have- to agree with you?” line he had back when Blaine was manipulating him.
And it ends with a new slipshine.
Well they defied my expectations by not whispering about a Black boyfriend. -2 points to the Walkerton parents as opposed to -3.
i’d would’ve thought linda would be fine if it’s like, “Anyone but marcie” , i’d imagine they’d have issues with it if they shipped her off to a catholic school and not just a strict boarding school unless all boarding schools are under some religious organizatoin
Most strict boarding schools are gonna be religious, as far as I know.
Yeah, either strict and religious or part of the troubled teen industry.
Or both
There’s also military themed ones.
AFAIK those don’t take females.
16 Rings for the Punk Rockers, in their stalls of bone…
Ok this had me laigh out loud on the bus, well played
Then my work here is done.
I wish I were a better writer so I could expand this into an entire poem.
This is where I would normally say “oh no, someone is reacting to the persona Sal projects exactly as if it were true”, but even I acknowledge that said persona is a reaction to this behavior from her parents, not the catalyst.
i mean given her “cool/doesn’t care attitude” thematically it would be fitting for her to have some kinda ‘cringefail’ dorky boyfriend because she doesn’t rly care how she’s perceived (tho even with some ‘dorky’ traits danny’s been pretty good overall)
but other than after the first family weekend on campus i’d think before that she presented herself as a ‘reformed catholic schoolgirl’ to her parents
I appreciate you for saying that first paragraph. I date who I want, you know?
Getting a sneaking feeling the seesaw of favoritism is going to shift
Charles: *mumbles indistinctly*
Linda: I don’t know… crane casually…
How is a crane casual?
I think it involes standing in rivers and foraging for fish & tubers, although at this point in comic flying south for the winter might also be the most casual thing to do…
Y’know. I actually fell off this webcomic a few years back. Not for any negative reason, I just lost track. Completely randomly for no reason at all as far as I can tell, my brain said “Huh. Wonder what’s goin on with Dumbing Of Age. It’s been a while. What are those kids up to, who’s dating who at this point?”
Alright well. Guess it’s time to get all caught up.
It’s a new semester now!
Oh you’re about to be in for quite a time.
Danny is gonna be to Sal what Dorothy was to him. That is, the boyfriend that her mom likes better than her. Transparently so.
So Amber and Becky had evil dads. Joyce and Sal (and Walky) have evil moms, though not quite as dramatically so. I wonder which pair each has the “family disappointment” uncles. Dorothy and Booster, maybe?
Joyce. We don’t talk about [s]Bruno[/s] her eldest brother.
Oh, I’m ready for it. Come on bring it.
Headline according to the Walkertons: Beautiful Egg Too Good for this Sal, Too Pure.
Uh-oh…
“I’ll bet she’ll be-“ what Linda? I bet she’ll be what?
Even odds she was about to say “late”
I hope Danny calls Linda out. Like I don’t normally expect Danny to have the spine, but Ukulele Dan… He’s got something going on
Ukelele Dan IS the hotter Dan
we might get that.
we had joe standing up for joyce, so we may also get dan telling linda where to stick her snark.
The heartbreak of Blade Dog and Destroyer knows no end.
(ref: https://www.dumbingofage.com/2013/comic/book-3/01-if-the-shoes-split/avail/ )
Kind of miss Sal and Jason hanging out in tutor sessions. They worked well together. Not as a couple, just for their banter.
What does Charles know about the size and placement of Danny’s penis
should have brought your ukulele
(just kidding, absolutely do not carry an instrument unprotected, especially in such a cold)
So, in the broadest, most forgiving sense, I can understand Charles’ response. It’s been almost a year since Sal started, and she was a lot more of a rebel figure at the start of DoA. Admittedly, it’s not like they tried to be a part of her life this past year, even after the shooting, kidnapping and everything. I could justify their ignorance if it wasn’t fueled by their apathy.
August to January is far from “almost” a year, it’s barely half a school year.
I’m not proud at how long it took me to realize that said re-adjust and not wonder wonder what the funk “read just” means.
Of course, the moment they find out Danny plays the ukulele they’ll regret their daughter isn’t with a punk rocker with 16 nose rings.
Imagine the “how did you two meet” story
“We started playing a video game because Danny thought I was the alter ego of his vigilante girlfriend but it turned out she was actually the girl who stabbed me. Then he helped me to not fail math by being a better teacher than my TA and probably my professor.”
“Also, the TA wouldn’t help me anymore after he got fired for impropriety with an undergraduate who was also me”
I like to believe that this was an actual guy that they’re referring to. He sounds cool. Cobras are so cute, I want to pet one again some day.
Quick, danny, re-sharpie your arm with a tattoo sleeve it’ll be funny
Danny is just too cute.
Love the Danny.
There’s that hand thing again. I’m still not sure what it is.
Sal should have brought Ethan. “This is the boy I traumatized years ago!”
“And here’s the gal who stabbed mah hand. We’re basically besties now.”
“The trauma he’s obviously dealing with right now is only tangentially related.”
Damn, if Danny and Sal weren’t monogamist and DannyXEthan hadn’t been shot in the foot, we could’ve had, “This is my boyfriend, Danny, and this is Danny’s boyfriend, Ethan.”
The mom lied to the dad! He thinks she turned them down but the mom didn’t invite her!
Woah. Nice catch.
“you wanna hang outs with us old fogeys after alll”
Ugh, Charles have a Jerry Smith’s (Rick and Morty) vibe that I fucking hate.
Danny, I can’t believe I’m saying this, but just be yourself.
Charles continues to suck SLIGHTLY less than Linda. But the bar is set so low a snake couldn’t play limbo with it.
Yeah. He’s at least like ‘great, time with my daughter,’ in panel 2, where Linda looks like she wishes she didn’t have to look at Sal.
I know she’s talked about dating guys her parents haven’t approved of, but I wonder how many that actually was, and how many her parents actually knew about?
By which I’m saying I wonder if Sal didn’t actually date many edgy boys (or if they were all edgy, not that many in general), and her parents have consistently assumed this about her.
I can’t even with them.
Both of them.
Nobody needs nor deserves, ugh, people like these.
I feel like the difference between her parents is:
Charles: It’s too bad Sal has never been as easy of a child as Walky, and that she’s made such poor choices for no reason I could possibly imagine. Guess she’s always going to be that way and there’s nothing I could have done.
Linda: It’s too bad Sal’s my daughter. I’ve known something was off with her ever since she started growing all that unruly hair.
YES. LITERALLY THIS.
Thank you for putting the difference between these two into words! Finally I get it! Finally I understand why they’re shitty in different ways!
I’m glad my interpretation made sense for you!