This is the sort of thing that gives Leslie such perfect Mom Energy.
Note that she doesn’t push. It’s obvious that Becky is sticking to her like glue because she’s troubled and needs a Grown-Up (most of the cast may be adults, but they are NOT grown-ups) to talk to, but if Leslie tries to drag it out of her she’ll clam up. So she just waits until Becky is ready to unburden.
On the other hand, Robin is quite good at pushing Becky when she’s being a sulky teenager. Becky trying to bury herself in work? Nuh uh, we’re watching a movie and you’re bringing your girlfriend.
If Becky stopped assuming that Dina broke up with her, she might need to actively do something about how she left things. But it seems for the moment that she’s not yet done wallowing in self-pity and/or sorting out her own feelings about Joyce and her own reaction to Joyce’s bisexual reveal.
I mean, I can’t really fault her for 1) giving Dina space and 2) assuming they may not be together right now. Their last conversation had Becky leave the prior convo because she realized she wasn’t in a good head space, Dina approached her, Becky said “if you’re gonna leave me just do it” and “I’m the problem”, Dina agreed that Becky was the problem and… left. I mean, that doesn’t exactly scream “but don’t worry we’re still dating” to me, personally. I don’t think it necessarily means “we are no more” but it definitely… I mean, it doesn’t say anything GOOD, yo. Dina walked away. I think the two having space right now is good and honestly Becky is doing things to fix her own mindset BY sorting out her feelings regarding the Joyce bisexual reveal, so I see no problems here honestly. Becky’s catastrophizing a bit perhaps, but she has a good reason to.
Like last time Becky talked to Dorothy she confirmed she doesn’t blame Dorothy and Joyce for being in love and affirmed that she just has her own hang ups. She honestly isn’t wallowing in self-pity at all just because she’s a bit sad.
Understandable. And agreed, it’ll be good to have Becky talk to someone who doesn’t have any skin in the game when it comes to these college freshman relationships, as well as some good outsider perspective.
“mild diffuse soft tissue swelling”, “bone degeneration and diffuse boney demineralization consistent with arthritus”, and “hammertoe deformation of 5th and 4th toes” they said
will need to get an MRI for further investigation, and to get stitches removed on the 21st
going back on Mupirocin, numbing myself with painkillers and tryin to stay numb and not think about world or anything, just exhausted all the time
need light at end of this tunnel… 🥴 feeling not well in head so much…
🫱🫲🫳🫴🫱🏼🫲🏾🙏🫸🫷🏽
(Emoji skin tones are always so hard to calibrate, but I do my best to emojify respectfully.)
What you’re describing sounds kind of like my own X-ray and MRI results. We just play the hand we’re dealt, you know? That’s all we can do. 😐😑😔❤️🩹🤷 Just place our trust in hope, in spite of it all. 🤲🫶🌱
Dina’s been sent to the drama dimension. Whenever a character could resolve a current point of tension in a story by talking to somebody they get banished there. It’s where Joe’s been trapped for the past 2.5 months.
Becky still could actually talk with Dina and confirm whether she considers them broken up or not. I feel like far too many characters in this comic lately don’t make it clear that they’re breaking up with someone, then just assume the relationship is over with that other person while leaving them hanging.
Idk, I’m absolutely baffled by how many people expect literally the words “I’m breaking up with you.” I’ve only ever been told that once, most of the time it is just one last fight like in the comic and then we don’t talk again.
I felt that way about the Walky/Lucy breakup, but I agree with Dot about this one. The actual conversation was much less definitive, and I’d expect Dina to be extremely direct if she meant to end the relationship.
So do y’all think those lines on Leslie’s (and Robin’s) face will go away with enough rest?
Or do you think they will remain as representations of the event and how it affected them?
I can see it as either or.
Leslie will develop more and more lines and details until she looks like a photorealistic human being, modeled after Molly Ringwald and Shirley Manson.
Considering they really didn’t do that much together, I would’ve thought Joe and Joyce’s relationship showed that Joe was capable of building a relationship on more than just The Fucking.
For me: Charlie x Dina after Carla chickens out of talking to her parents for too long. Especially because I think it’ll give Carla a kick in the butt to actually DO the big scary thing and talk to them.
You know, this strip makes me wonder how many relationships Leslie’s been in. We know of course of the marriage to a man, the… something with Robin, and Anna, but has she had any girlfriends otherwise?
Not that we know of specifically. The cast page says “She’s as bad at choosing romantic partners as romantic partners are bad at choosing her.”
So she could’ve had other one-sided relationships that we haven’t heard about, but nobody wonderful for her yet.
I hope Becky has a good talk/cry with her teacher/mother so she can reorient herself and actually have a healthy conversation with Dina instead of just burning all bridges
Depends on the series in general and the timeline in particular. Earlier lines used the red spectrum for operations (engineering, security, and support). Later lines use it for command mostly. And Becky has real-world command experience (communication and politics). So we deduce the magenta means Becky is TNG or later and in the command dept. Leslie, of course, is in education and medical, thus the blue.
She’s assuming Dina broke up with her because Dina confirmed that Becky is the problem here and walked away. She 100% does NOT want to be broken up with her, she’s still yearning for Dina.
This situation immediately brings to mind a scene from Buffy Season 5. Willow tells Giles that she and Tara had a fight. He notes that he’d never seen theim argue before, and she confirms that it was their first argument. He replies, “Well, at least that’s over.”
Willow jumps all the conclusions and says, “But we can’t be over! I just found her!”
Giles tells her that the fight is over. Now, they can learn that they can have arguments, even serious ones, and still come back from it.
Hm, i don’t agree with “Becky said some dumb things“.
If the things are true, not saying then just means dishonesty.
Not every truth needs to be spoken, but there’s no way Becky could hide such strong emotional distress from Dina without being dishonest and unauthentic. It’s the natural course of things ne matter if she’d said them out loud or failed to hide them otherwise.
Dina and Becky need to reckon with the fact that the relationship IS a rebound.
I just hope they will get over that. I need this pair to be together!
The way she phrased it wasn’t great, but neither was the way Dina phrased her reply. They’re both still learning how to do this “relationship” stuff, after all.
Lots of commentary about how they’re broken up, or it’s not definitive – isn’t this still Monday? Which would mean the “breakup” happened yesterday? When we were dating (and she hadn’t learned yet that she had severe clinical depression, because her mom still insisted all her problems would go away if she prayed hard enough), my then-fiancee would withdraw because her depression told her she didn’t deserve me. We’ve been together since 1997.
It does take a lot of maturity to admit you were wrong… though Dina would be a bad girlfriend if she flat-out broke up with Becky during their first fight. Although Becky seems to have this mindview that couples don’t fight, so she’s resigned to the fact that Dina is gone forever because Becky still holds a torch for Joyce…
I really don’t know what advice I could give her since I always champion relationship breakups at the first sight of a red flag, and your girlfriend still not getting over her first crush, even if she’s still a teen and it hasn’t even been four full months since the crush shot her down, is a MASSIVE red flag.
Some thoughts on this. Usually I’d agree completely, but I think in this case there are additional factors than just “your girlfriend isn’t getting over her first crush” because Becky was processing those feelings according to an inaccurate premise. She was processing the rejection as “my crush CAN’T like me back, because my crush is straight. There was never actually any chance of reciprocation. I am hurt, but ah well, c’est la vie, que será será etc.” Realizing Joyce ISN’T straight re-opened those healing wounds! Suddenly the problem wan’t Joyce being straight, the problem was that Joyce just didn’t love Becky the same way Becky loved her even though, in theory, she could have. That is a whole other ballgame. The original premise was easier to accept because it was totally unreasonable to take it personally. The actual facts are much, much harder to process because (from Becky’s point of view) now the rejection feels personal. It feels like something Becky might have had control over. There’s going to be a lot of bitterness wrapped up in that.
If, four months from NOW, Becky still hasn’t processed her affection for Joyce into a different format, then yeah, that’s a red flag, I’m with you all the way. But from where I’m sitting, it would make sense to give the kid some grace and restart that clock, you know?
(That being said, I do also totally understand Dina’s pain. From where she’s sitting, regardless of what color the flag is, this felt like a major slap in the face. I’d definitely have trouble moving forward without at least taking some time to think things through by myself.)
Yeah at the end of the day this kind of problem is one that can mostly be solved by giving each other some space and then coming together to talk frankly and openly. It’s not unsolvable, but Becky needs to be told that because she doesn’t yet have the frame of reference to fully understand it on her own.
Red flags are different for everyone and while I think “still hung up on childhood crush” isn’t great, I don’t think it’s a red flag unless every time Joyce gets into a relationship, Becky brings out the ice cream and gets upset. When I think ‘red flag’, I think for example of my own ‘one time = break up’ red flags, which are cheating and physical abuse. If I’m dating someone and they cheat or strike me, that’s immediate. Do not pass go. Do not collect 100 dollars.
This comic has brought something home to me about the general pacing and focus of these comics, which isn’t likely intentional but is also pretty standard in most comics.
Leslie and Robin have just spent a night in jail for lawfully peacefully protesting. The kids have gotten them out, off-screen, which in the same vein this would have been another interesting thing to actually witness happen, and we are resuming the Becky has a mom figure to confide in and process arc, which as an audience we have largely been hopeful for.
But also, it’s myopic as fuck. Which could be true to life! A teenager diving into their own problems to an adult that has just endured a traumatic event is definitely a common occurrence.
What seems less real, though is that Leslie has Nothing to say about her arrest or time in jail. She has nothing to say about the protest or the events they were protesting. Maybe she’s trying to keep her feelings under her hat in the event that it sent her back to the clink, it’s equivalent to the hank-kids lunch happening off-screen. It makes it clear that the focus of this entire comic is who is shagging whom and who’s heart is getting broken. Other feelings, other issues, are not worth addressing.
I know this sounds harsh, but I don’t disrespect it – I would expect this from most media. It just hits me that this sort of lack of background noise is also what kind of strangles the effectiveness of comics as a medium, in a sense. When we take Joss whedon or Kevin Smith writing for reference and not that they excel at dialogue particularly because the dialogue is usually superfluous to the overarching plot at the time, but this can be managed in a live-action movie or series because there’s just a lot more resource availability and more can be done in a single day.
In a daily comic, things have to be to the point of whichever plot thread is happening, with little vision into outside perspectives or goings on. It makes sense, it’s just sad, in a way.
I honestly just think that Leslie, as the older person here, recognizes that unloading whatever her feelings about the arrest and potential police brutality are onto Becky wouldn’t really be appropriate. It’s a pretty universal concept that if you are mentoring someone (especially someone younger) you don’t trauma dump on them. However, if the younger person requires a listening ear, you set aside your baggage to listen.
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=(
D:
This is the sort of thing that gives Leslie such perfect Mom Energy.
Note that she doesn’t push. It’s obvious that Becky is sticking to her like glue because she’s troubled and needs a Grown-Up (most of the cast may be adults, but they are NOT grown-ups) to talk to, but if Leslie tries to drag it out of her she’ll clam up. So she just waits until Becky is ready to unburden.
Leslie is Best Mom.
On the other hand, Robin is quite good at pushing Becky when she’s being a sulky teenager. Becky trying to bury herself in work? Nuh uh, we’re watching a movie and you’re bringing your girlfriend.
Okay then, Leslie + Robin is the best mom.
Are they known together as Rolie or Lesbin?
My vote is for Lesbin
Or DeBean
Lesbean
That’s just Leslie and the pun of her name.
Lesbin DeBean
“So, the main reason I rescued you is I did a dumb thing and I need an adult.”
“But you are an adult.”
“I need a more qualified one!”
Un-DNA’d herself? So she is an RNA only lifeform now?
DNA is just how RNA takes notes.
Proof that the RNA Hypothesis is right!
No, no, she Undine’d herself. She cast a water elemental spirit summon upon herself.
She clearly forgot to use Carbunkle first to set up reflect.
(Yes, I know reflect doesn’t work on summons – shut up, imaginary straw person.)
No, she Undyne’d herself. She stabbed herself with a spear…
…actually, better not.
She just resolved not to address her problems with force. Which is certainly wise.
She unDanaid herself. She is no longer a Bronze Age Greek warrior. Though she will still accept fan art of herself in ancient armor.
Maybe you need to say more dumb things and redina yourself, though that involves actually talking to her.
the problem is she hasn’t said enough to try and dina-fy herself
THIS IS YET TO BE PROVEN. FOR THE WELLBEING OF WILLIS’S SHINS YOU SHOULD HOPE IT ISN’T
The unconfirmed assumption that Dina did in fact break up with Becky is still soing some real heavy lifting in this drama
If Becky stopped assuming that Dina broke up with her, she might need to actively do something about how she left things. But it seems for the moment that she’s not yet done wallowing in self-pity and/or sorting out her own feelings about Joyce and her own reaction to Joyce’s bisexual reveal.
I mean, I can’t really fault her for 1) giving Dina space and 2) assuming they may not be together right now. Their last conversation had Becky leave the prior convo because she realized she wasn’t in a good head space, Dina approached her, Becky said “if you’re gonna leave me just do it” and “I’m the problem”, Dina agreed that Becky was the problem and… left. I mean, that doesn’t exactly scream “but don’t worry we’re still dating” to me, personally. I don’t think it necessarily means “we are no more” but it definitely… I mean, it doesn’t say anything GOOD, yo. Dina walked away. I think the two having space right now is good and honestly Becky is doing things to fix her own mindset BY sorting out her feelings regarding the Joyce bisexual reveal, so I see no problems here honestly. Becky’s catastrophizing a bit perhaps, but she has a good reason to.
Like last time Becky talked to Dorothy she confirmed she doesn’t blame Dorothy and Joyce for being in love and affirmed that she just has her own hang ups. She honestly isn’t wallowing in self-pity at all just because she’s a bit sad.
Thanks for that perspective. I may have been reading self-pity into what may instead be a giant mash of occasionally conflicting emotions.
It looks like we’ll learn soon what Becky has to say about her own feelings.
Understandable. And agreed, it’ll be good to have Becky talk to someone who doesn’t have any skin in the game when it comes to these college freshman relationships, as well as some good outsider perspective.
Not technically the last time Becky talked to Dorothy, but
https://www.dumbingofage.com/2025/comic/book-16/02-im-the-problem-its-me/brokenup/ is the strip in question.
Dina context:
The last time she was shown with Becky:
https://www.dumbingofage.com/2025/comic/book-16/01-not-so-smooth-criminals/consolationprize/
and the last time she mentioned Becky in strip:
https://www.dumbingofage.com/2025/comic/book-16/01-not-so-smooth-criminals/loopy/
Becky is dumb like that (affectionate).
It’s almost like she was in a webcomic titled after dumb things while growing up.
I’d say Leslie knows what that haircut signals. :\
Why is there not a section in Gender Studies called Queer Haircuts?
Considering who’s teaching it right now, there may very well be.
Mind you, it’s just Joyce lecturing everyone on why Dorothy’s hair is scientifically the prettiest ever, while Roz facepalms in the background.
Is it also Leslie’s current haircut? Is it just coincidence in the way it’s drawn, or is that actually meant to be the same haircut?
There are similarities but I wouldn’t call them the same
I’m very excited to see how long we can keep this up without seeing or talking to Dina
She’s actually been in every strip for the past couple of weeks, but it’s Dina and she doesn’t want to be noticed right now.
Dina herself said that Becky was always able to perceive her. So, nice theory but not possible.
Dina is getting a new haircut (or hat) right now.
or being in a far away place away from people so she could just cry herself out on the worst day of her life TT~TT
*plays “Atonement” by Danny Baranowsky on hacked muzak*
I’m not, I miss her already TT~TT
be it my leg or the lack of Dina, i just fuckin miserable rn
trying so hard not to spiral
I hope your leg feels better soon and heals well!
*Pours Tea.*
🍵🫖🧉☕️
🥺🥺😭😭🫂🫂
thank you…
my x-ray results got back at least
“mild diffuse soft tissue swelling”, “bone degeneration and diffuse boney demineralization consistent with arthritus”, and “hammertoe deformation of 5th and 4th toes” they said
will need to get an MRI for further investigation, and to get stitches removed on the 21st
going back on Mupirocin, numbing myself with painkillers and tryin to stay numb and not think about world or anything, just exhausted all the time
need light at end of this tunnel… 🥴 feeling not well in head so much…
*Extends a hand to hold*
🫱🫲🫳🫴🫱🏼🫲🏾🙏🫸🫷🏽
(Emoji skin tones are always so hard to calibrate, but I do my best to emojify respectfully.)
What you’re describing sounds kind of like my own X-ray and MRI results. We just play the hand we’re dealt, you know? That’s all we can do. 😐😑😔❤️🩹🤷 Just place our trust in hope, in spite of it all. 🤲🫶🌱
hey, hey, dont worry
and yeah i gotta play the cards yeah
cuz the universe like one giant video poker machine
hell, more like a Yugioh game at this point
life finds a way and all that
thanks Laura, all means a lot 🥲
Any time, friend. ❤️🩹
I hope for your sake specifically Dina is in the next strip
Dina’s been sent to the drama dimension. Whenever a character could resolve a current point of tension in a story by talking to somebody they get banished there. It’s where Joe’s been trapped for the past 2.5 months.
Hopefully Joe and Dina are getting to bond as friends while they’re there.
Yayyyyy proud of becky for actually saying her feelings
Good, glad Becky’s finally getting to talk to Leslie. Hopefully, Leslie can help her see that it was hardly a definitive breakup.
That’s a little unfair, Becky. You may have said things to drive Dina away, but it was her choice to leave. Don’t disempower her.
Becky still could actually talk with Dina and confirm whether she considers them broken up or not. I feel like far too many characters in this comic lately don’t make it clear that they’re breaking up with someone, then just assume the relationship is over with that other person while leaving them hanging.
Communicate? In a relationship? That’s just crazy talk.
(*Black Panther meme) We don’t do that here.
Idk, I’m absolutely baffled by how many people expect literally the words “I’m breaking up with you.” I’ve only ever been told that once, most of the time it is just one last fight like in the comic and then we don’t talk again.
Dina is a very direct person and one would expect she would directly confirm any breakup if it has occurred.
I felt that way about the Walky/Lucy breakup, but I agree with Dot about this one. The actual conversation was much less definitive, and I’d expect Dina to be extremely direct if she meant to end the relationship.
Becky seems to have skipped over the first stage of grief. Probably because she knows that she screwed up, and the situation is pretty un-Dina-able.
Nah, the first stage of grief is haircut.
I doubt this will end with Dina saying they assumed it was a break like Ross and Rachel.
Oddly enough, equally as toxic.
And then they have a babby!
that….that sure is a word
…the urge to just name the page “undina’s myself” must have been very strong
It was un-dina-able.
Becky knows Dina deserves better than being settled for and she absolutely is doing so.
“Sir! Lord Mayor! Un-bonk yourself!”
“I understood that reference!”
Why yes, alt text, yes I do.
What do you un-that yourself of?
So do y’all think those lines on Leslie’s (and Robin’s) face will go away with enough rest?
Or do you think they will remain as representations of the event and how it affected them?
I can see it as either or.
Leslie will develop more and more lines and details until she looks like a photorealistic human being, modeled after Molly Ringwald and Shirley Manson.
If I knew who either of those were, I would probably be concerned.
“Sorry to drop this on you when you’ve just been released from police custody, but I REALLY need my mom” 🙁
I truly feel that Leslie is the best person to redirect Becky to better roads.
Now let’s see how this actually goes… 😛
Still assumed rather than confirmed, but if it turns out Becky is right then I’m going to be rooting for Joe x Dina.
What is that, anyway? Jona?
They might be good together, but… I wonder. Somehow I don’t think they are that compatible.
Dina previously explained how short-lived she expected any sexual interactions between her and Joe would likely be:
https://www.dumbingofage.com/2021/comic/book-12/02-ill-leave-you-a-phantom/tedium/
It would be an interesting research project, but perhaps nothing more.
Considering they really didn’t do that much together, I would’ve thought Joe and Joyce’s relationship showed that Joe was capable of building a relationship on more than just The Fucking.
I’m on team Sarah/Joe. Idk who I’d put Dina with after Becky.
For me: Charlie x Dina after Carla chickens out of talking to her parents for too long. Especially because I think it’ll give Carla a kick in the butt to actually DO the big scary thing and talk to them.
Mum, I messed up bad.
You know, this strip makes me wonder how many relationships Leslie’s been in. We know of course of the marriage to a man, the… something with Robin, and Anna, but has she had any girlfriends otherwise?
Not that we know of specifically. The cast page says “She’s as bad at choosing romantic partners as romantic partners are bad at choosing her.”
So she could’ve had other one-sided relationships that we haven’t heard about, but nobody wonderful for her yet.
Gimme dat sweet, sweet, disaster lesbian Leslie lore Willis
I hope Becky has a good talk/cry with her teacher/mother so she can reorient herself and actually have a healthy conversation with Dina instead of just burning all bridges
Everyone else: comments about ambiguous relationship status
Me: So, what department does a magenta Starfleet uniform signify?
Depends on the series in general and the timeline in particular. Earlier lines used the red spectrum for operations (engineering, security, and support). Later lines use it for command mostly. And Becky has real-world command experience (communication and politics). So we deduce the magenta means Becky is TNG or later and in the command dept. Leslie, of course, is in education and medical, thus the blue.
Dykery
Boldly going, and all that.
Boldly coming is more like it.
I’m going to speculate that Becky is assuming they’re broken up because…she wants to be broken up with Dina.
Because she’s stewing in her own misery and drove her off.
I think Becky broke off with her as much as anything else.
She’s assuming Dina broke up with her because Dina confirmed that Becky is the problem here and walked away. She 100% does NOT want to be broken up with her, she’s still yearning for Dina.
Not wants to really, but maybe doesn’t feel like she deserves Dina? Sometimes it’s easier just to wallow in misery.
This situation immediately brings to mind a scene from Buffy Season 5. Willow tells Giles that she and Tara had a fight. He notes that he’d never seen theim argue before, and she confirms that it was their first argument. He replies, “Well, at least that’s over.”
Willow jumps all the conclusions and says, “But we can’t be over! I just found her!”
Giles tells her that the fight is over. Now, they can learn that they can have arguments, even serious ones, and still come back from it.
What happened next was terrifying, though…
He obvio
usly disappeared in the middle of a sentence.
Yes, sorry. Stupid lack of edit to fix that. I meant to have just deleted that.
Damn you, lack of edit function.
she turned dina sour
nice one
“Well, whether it makes a difference or not… if you said some dumb things, have you apologised afterwards?”
Panel 5 is def “I shouldn’t lie to my mom” thought bubble
Hm, i don’t agree with “Becky said some dumb things“.
If the things are true, not saying then just means dishonesty.
Not every truth needs to be spoken, but there’s no way Becky could hide such strong emotional distress from Dina without being dishonest and unauthentic. It’s the natural course of things ne matter if she’d said them out loud or failed to hide them otherwise.
Dina and Becky need to reckon with the fact that the relationship IS a rebound.
I just hope they will get over that. I need this pair to be together!
The way she phrased it wasn’t great, but neither was the way Dina phrased her reply. They’re both still learning how to do this “relationship” stuff, after all.
Nice to see Dina get to talk to her mom about her relationship problems
Lots of commentary about how they’re broken up, or it’s not definitive – isn’t this still Monday? Which would mean the “breakup” happened yesterday? When we were dating (and she hadn’t learned yet that she had severe clinical depression, because her mom still insisted all her problems would go away if she prayed hard enough), my then-fiancee would withdraw because her depression told her she didn’t deserve me. We’ve been together since 1997.
I’m glad she heard and believed you. Depression is the worst chatbot.
🙂 I’m still not entirely certain she believes me on that, but the meds and the therapy help.
“Depression is the worst chatbot.” is the second highly quotable thing I’ve seen in the comments today.
So, my birthday gift is Becky walking back with Leslie, and have the difficult talk that she’s holding since the passing of her mom.
yay *mild, discrete cheering*
It does take a lot of maturity to admit you were wrong… though Dina would be a bad girlfriend if she flat-out broke up with Becky during their first fight. Although Becky seems to have this mindview that couples don’t fight, so she’s resigned to the fact that Dina is gone forever because Becky still holds a torch for Joyce…
I really don’t know what advice I could give her since I always champion relationship breakups at the first sight of a red flag, and your girlfriend still not getting over her first crush, even if she’s still a teen and it hasn’t even been four full months since the crush shot her down, is a MASSIVE red flag.
Some thoughts on this. Usually I’d agree completely, but I think in this case there are additional factors than just “your girlfriend isn’t getting over her first crush” because Becky was processing those feelings according to an inaccurate premise. She was processing the rejection as “my crush CAN’T like me back, because my crush is straight. There was never actually any chance of reciprocation. I am hurt, but ah well, c’est la vie, que será será etc.” Realizing Joyce ISN’T straight re-opened those healing wounds! Suddenly the problem wan’t Joyce being straight, the problem was that Joyce just didn’t love Becky the same way Becky loved her even though, in theory, she could have. That is a whole other ballgame. The original premise was easier to accept because it was totally unreasonable to take it personally. The actual facts are much, much harder to process because (from Becky’s point of view) now the rejection feels personal. It feels like something Becky might have had control over. There’s going to be a lot of bitterness wrapped up in that.
If, four months from NOW, Becky still hasn’t processed her affection for Joyce into a different format, then yeah, that’s a red flag, I’m with you all the way. But from where I’m sitting, it would make sense to give the kid some grace and restart that clock, you know?
(That being said, I do also totally understand Dina’s pain. From where she’s sitting, regardless of what color the flag is, this felt like a major slap in the face. I’d definitely have trouble moving forward without at least taking some time to think things through by myself.)
Yeah at the end of the day this kind of problem is one that can mostly be solved by giving each other some space and then coming together to talk frankly and openly. It’s not unsolvable, but Becky needs to be told that because she doesn’t yet have the frame of reference to fully understand it on her own.
Why would you give her any advice? Why would she want advice from you? Why would you think you advice was of value?
Why you think this is a worthwhile thing to comment?
Red flags are different for everyone and while I think “still hung up on childhood crush” isn’t great, I don’t think it’s a red flag unless every time Joyce gets into a relationship, Becky brings out the ice cream and gets upset. When I think ‘red flag’, I think for example of my own ‘one time = break up’ red flags, which are cheating and physical abuse. If I’m dating someone and they cheat or strike me, that’s immediate. Do not pass go. Do not collect 100 dollars.
This comic has brought something home to me about the general pacing and focus of these comics, which isn’t likely intentional but is also pretty standard in most comics.
Leslie and Robin have just spent a night in jail for lawfully peacefully protesting. The kids have gotten them out, off-screen, which in the same vein this would have been another interesting thing to actually witness happen, and we are resuming the Becky has a mom figure to confide in and process arc, which as an audience we have largely been hopeful for.
But also, it’s myopic as fuck. Which could be true to life! A teenager diving into their own problems to an adult that has just endured a traumatic event is definitely a common occurrence.
What seems less real, though is that Leslie has Nothing to say about her arrest or time in jail. She has nothing to say about the protest or the events they were protesting. Maybe she’s trying to keep her feelings under her hat in the event that it sent her back to the clink, it’s equivalent to the hank-kids lunch happening off-screen. It makes it clear that the focus of this entire comic is who is shagging whom and who’s heart is getting broken. Other feelings, other issues, are not worth addressing.
I know this sounds harsh, but I don’t disrespect it – I would expect this from most media. It just hits me that this sort of lack of background noise is also what kind of strangles the effectiveness of comics as a medium, in a sense. When we take Joss whedon or Kevin Smith writing for reference and not that they excel at dialogue particularly because the dialogue is usually superfluous to the overarching plot at the time, but this can be managed in a live-action movie or series because there’s just a lot more resource availability and more can be done in a single day.
In a daily comic, things have to be to the point of whichever plot thread is happening, with little vision into outside perspectives or goings on. It makes sense, it’s just sad, in a way.
I honestly just think that Leslie, as the older person here, recognizes that unloading whatever her feelings about the arrest and potential police brutality are onto Becky wouldn’t really be appropriate. It’s a pretty universal concept that if you are mentoring someone (especially someone younger) you don’t trauma dump on them. However, if the younger person requires a listening ear, you set aside your baggage to listen.
I kind of feel that if you want a different story, you’re free to write it.