Dumbing of Age Book Twelve

Dumbing of Age

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May 12, 2026

Throuples

by David M Willis on December 19, 2021 at 12:01 am
  • 02 – I'll Leave You A Phantom
└ Tags: amber, danny, sal

Discussion (197) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. Ana Chronistic
    Ana Chronistic
    December 19, 2021 at 12:03 am | #

    “I’d like an order of rump, and I’ll eat it straight off this table”

    • Clif
      Clif
      December 19, 2021 at 12:58 am | #

      Danny really needs a way to disengage his mouth from his thoughts.

      • Decidedly Orthogonal
        Decidedly Orthogonal
        December 19, 2021 at 8:45 am | #

        pretty sure an order of table rump would disengage his voice quite effectively.

      • All-Purpose Guru
        All-Purpose Guru
        December 20, 2021 at 11:35 am | #

        I figure if Sal fucks his brains out that will happen pretty directly.

  2. anon
    anon
    December 19, 2021 at 12:04 am | #

    is marcie still not with malaya or was that more of a fling?

    • King Daniel
      King Daniel
      December 19, 2021 at 12:06 am | #

      Was Marcie ever with Malaya to begin with?

      (Other than in a strictly physical “I’m sitting here with you” sense)

    • The Wellerman
      The Wellerman
      December 19, 2021 at 12:06 am | #

      What about that one bonus comic?

      Serious hint at future development or bonus gag?

      At this point, it’s anyone’s guess. I guess.

    • Kyrik Michalowski
      Kyrik Michalowski
      December 19, 2021 at 12:07 am | #

      I think she is still with Malaya(to whatever degree Malaya admits), as Sal is talking about a threesome.

      • Thag Simmons
        Thag Simmons
        December 19, 2021 at 12:12 am | #

        Yeah, it doesn’t work as well if Marcie’s single.

      • The Wellerman
        The Wellerman
        December 19, 2021 at 12:12 am | #

        Amber doesn’t know what she’s missing! 😲

      • Fay
        Fay
        December 19, 2021 at 2:25 am | #

        Seeing as Sal was specifically responding to a question about open relationships, that might just mean that Marcie is poly or at least Marcie and Malaya have an open relationship.

    • Kaiyalai
      Kaiyalai
      December 19, 2021 at 9:07 am | #

      Considering that, last I checked, Sal is still Not A Fan of Malaya, I can see Sal saying this regardless of Marcie and Malaya’s relationship status

  3. Kyrik Michalowski
    Kyrik Michalowski
    December 19, 2021 at 12:05 am | #

    Careful Danny, Sal might make you take responsibility with comments like that. Not that we would mind. Right everyone?

    • Sirksome
      Sirksome
      December 19, 2021 at 12:09 am | #

      She’d need a grappling hook first.

      • Kyrik Michalowski
        Kyrik Michalowski
        December 19, 2021 at 12:13 am | #

        What is the grappling hook for? I’m genuinely confused.

        • Thag Simmons
          Thag Simmons
          December 19, 2021 at 12:17 am | #

          I’m pretty sure it happened once in a slipshine.

          • Kyrik Michalowski
            Kyrik Michalowski
            December 19, 2021 at 12:20 am | #

            Why are my messages getting eaten?

            • King Daniel
              King Daniel
              December 19, 2021 at 12:26 am | #

              The server hungers.

            • Roborat
              Roborat
              December 21, 2021 at 6:27 pm | #

              ’cause you aren’t using a grappling hook?

        • Sam
          Sam
          December 19, 2021 at 12:20 am | #

          For playing superheroes, duh. We know that is what Danny likes.

          • Kyrik Michalowski
            Kyrik Michalowski
            December 19, 2021 at 12:22 am | #

            That makes sense too.

    • Delicious Taffy
      Delicious Taffy
      December 19, 2021 at 2:11 am | #

      I’m glad for this confirmation that Danny either wants to eat Sal’s ass or eat food off of her ass. It’s very humanizing and grounds his character.

      • Kyrik Michalowski
        Kyrik Michalowski
        December 19, 2021 at 10:03 am | #

        Eating food off her ass, or eat her ass? Porque no los dos?

  4. Sirksome
    Sirksome
    December 19, 2021 at 12:07 am | #

    Yeah I think this is a story about Amber channeling her inner jerk, hopefully with a payoff of her deciding to work more on herself instead of thinking she’s “the monster”.

    • RassilonTDavros
      RassilonTDavros
      December 19, 2021 at 12:10 am | #

      Considering Brain Mike is probably talking to her during all of this… yeah.

      • Laura
        Laura
        December 19, 2021 at 12:13 pm | #

        Given that comment about “We made him. Together.” I assume the line between her and Mike has blurred.

        • Sev
          Sev
          December 22, 2021 at 6:29 am | #

          Still catching up and late to the party, but I hadn’t even considered that she was talking to Mike and not Danny there, I just thought she meant whatever happened between Danny and Ethan combined with her history with him the result was EEE.

    • C.T. Phipps
      C.T. Phipps
      December 19, 2021 at 12:18 am | #

      With her father dead, Regular Amber may no longer have a seething rage driving her.

      Regular Amber may instead be motivated by just gross inappropriateness. Which may come from Joedad’s influence replacing the abusive psychopath.

      • Sirksome
        Sirksome
        December 19, 2021 at 12:29 am | #

        I really doubt it’s influence from Joe’s dad. (Richard? Is that his name?) Dude’s been in her life maybe 6 months tops most of which was spent banging her mom off campus. One holiday break doesn’t seem long enough to absorb habits from him. And he also specifically said he wasn’t going to try and replace her father.

        Most likely “Amber” and not AG just doesn’t have muvh she feels like communicating or relating to her peers so she’s just defaulting to being a creepy sex pest. Also lack of sleep.

        • DrunkenNordmann
          DrunkenNordmann
          December 19, 2021 at 12:58 am | #

          I think it’s more due to Amber’s main social circle up to this point pretty much enabling her worst habits (Ethan didn’t really ever put his foot down and Mike just goaded her).

          In other words: She didn’t have any friends who’d tell her “This is fucked up, could you please stop?”

          • ktbear
            ktbear
            December 19, 2021 at 2:40 am | #

            And yet Danny just did so…

            • Rainhat
              Rainhat
              December 19, 2021 at 6:01 am | #

              “Didn’t have”, past tense.

            • Lanie
              Lanie
              December 19, 2021 at 6:06 am | #

              I think that’s the point being made though, that Danny is one of the first people Amber is/was emotionally close to telling her that an idea is pretty messed up and to stop. Arguably Ethan has hit his limit as well, but I think there’s a lot more baggage that got him there.

              • Needfuldoer
                Needfuldoer
                December 19, 2021 at 8:25 am | #

                And Amaziber dumped him in response.

                https://www.dumbingofage.com/2016/comic/book-6/03-when-god-closes-the-door/teensiest/

                Amber lost both of the Big Bads her mental comic book superhero origin story were built on. (Blaine’s dead, and Sal turned out to be more than a one-dimensional character.) Now she’s adrift and turning inward.

                • someone
                  someone
                  December 19, 2021 at 12:18 pm | #

                  Also, as a philosopher would say, her brain is trash and she lives on the Internet.

                • Opus the Poet
                  Opus the Poet
                  December 19, 2021 at 4:33 pm | #

                  I have that t-shirt.

        • Nono
          Nono
          December 19, 2021 at 1:10 am | #

          It’s Richard yeah, it’s a Dick joke. Because y’know.

      • Thag Simmons
        Thag Simmons
        December 19, 2021 at 12:30 am | #

        She’s always had a horny side, she’s always been a shipper. This is an extreme version of established behavior.

      • Rainhat
        Rainhat
        December 19, 2021 at 6:04 am | #

        Nope, that’s just her, there’s no outside dad influence to blame.

    • Archieve
      Archieve
      December 19, 2021 at 12:55 am | #

      Looks like all this focusing on Ethan and Danny getting together for her amusement is her being being passive aggressive with Sal. The first thing she did after Sal told her was go to Ethan and try to get him to say something bad about Sal. Now she’s latched on to the “threesome” idea to justify her ex hooking up with another guys she’s had feeling for to avoid thinking of Sal and Danny as a real couple.

      • Thag Simmons
        Thag Simmons
        December 19, 2021 at 12:58 pm | #

        I don’t think that’s what she’s doing. I don’t that’s the motive, at least

        • Archieve
          Archieve
          December 19, 2021 at 8:15 pm | #

          No conciously atleast but she is severely sleep deprived right now.

  5. Buli-Buli
    Buli-Buli
    December 19, 2021 at 12:09 am | #

    And just like that this instantly becomes palatable and at least an order of magnitude more entertaining.

  6. DarkoNeko
    DarkoNeko
    December 19, 2021 at 12:10 am | #

    Ah, Danny caught the turbohorny

    • The Wellerman
      The Wellerman
      December 19, 2021 at 12:11 am | #

      Looks like Amber is Patient Zero.

      Don’t forget that.

      • The Wellerman
        The Wellerman
        December 19, 2021 at 12:21 am | #

        Woops nevermind looks like Joe or Joe’s Dad might be the OG Fap Fairy.

        • The Wellerman
          The Wellerman
          December 19, 2021 at 12:33 am | #

          Well, Amber says she made herself, so at this point, inconclusive.

      • ValdVin
        ValdVin
        December 19, 2021 at 5:59 am | #

        Hey, it’s really early and I’m not even 50% awake, so genuinely asking: Am I doing it wrong that I’m not seing anything when I hover my mouse pointer over Don’t forget that?

        Cheers.

        • The Wellerman
          The Wellerman
          December 19, 2021 at 6:59 am | #

          Oh, you’re doing it right.

          I just used the acronym tag because the true underline tag isn’t supported here.

  7. alongcameaspider
    alongcameaspider
    December 19, 2021 at 12:12 am | #

    From objectifying people to suggesting Ethan is “owed” a sexual relationship by anyone, for any reason

    And this is setting aside that Ethan made it very clear he hates Danny and wants nothing to do with him

    Amber’s making a strong case for being named grossest character in the comic

    • C.T. Phipps
      C.T. Phipps
      December 19, 2021 at 12:16 am | #

      I appreciate this to an extent because it’s nice to see equality in grossness.

      I blame Joedad’s influence on his new daughter.

      • The Wellerman
        The Wellerman
        December 19, 2021 at 12:19 am | #

        Yo! I haven’t even thought of THAT factor!

        *recalculating*

      • Thag Simmons
        Thag Simmons
        December 19, 2021 at 12:20 am | #

        I would point out that she and Faz are siblings.

        • King Daniel
          King Daniel
          December 19, 2021 at 12:34 am | #

          Faz is rubbing off on her?

          • Thag Simmons
            Thag Simmons
            December 19, 2021 at 12:37 am | #

            I would avoid wording it like that.

          • Needfuldoer
            Needfuldoer
            December 19, 2021 at 8:33 am | #

            This isn’t Shortpacked!, and even that version of Faz burned the pillow when he found out they’re related.

            This Faz put Amber off limits from the start; she gets “act out the part of the pesky little brother” Faz instead.

            No Folger’s Christmas commercial energy here.

            • The Wellerman
              The Wellerman
              December 19, 2021 at 4:50 pm | #

              Folger’s instant coffee?

              I don’t get it.

              • Tan
                Tan
                December 19, 2021 at 7:03 pm | #

                https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uMwFWDIFVCU

                This is an actual Folger’s commercial which aired on American broadcast television. Judge the vibes for yourself.

                • Needfuldoer
                  Needfuldoer
                  December 19, 2021 at 8:03 pm | #

                  It’s a Christmas staple, along with making fun of Wonderful Christmastime and The Christmas Shoes.

                  https://twitter.com/damnyouwillis/status/1206615168404393984

                • The Wellerman
                  The Wellerman
                  December 19, 2021 at 9:00 pm | #

                  Not that I don’t enjoy a nostalgic, mildly fucked up commercial like this and the Slim Jim ones, but did he just say that he couldn’t get “real” coffee in WEST AFRICA?!?! 🤨

                  That’s where like HALF of all coffee beans come from!!!

      • DrunkenNordmann
        DrunkenNordmann
        December 19, 2021 at 12:53 am | #

        I honestly doubt this is due to Joe’s dad being a bad influence.

        Amber’s always been a shipper and not the most socially well-adjusted person. It doesn’t help that her best friends were both people who’d pretty much just enable her (Ethan by not putting his foot down, Mike by intentionally goading her into it).

        I feel like blaming this on [insert person] is just trying to absolve her from any responsibility for acting like a shitty person.

      • Fay
        Fay
        December 19, 2021 at 2:28 am | #

        Bold of you to assume Amber would even listen to anything Joedad says.

      • thumb
        thumb
        December 19, 2021 at 5:40 am | #

        I figure she’s reduced her social connections to 2D cutouts. They’re not exactly real people to her, if that makes sense. Like celebrities. And in her current state of mind, that means she can’t properly empathise with them. Maybe she’s trying, but she’s all askew. Treats them like fictional characters. Which, as we all know, they definitely are not.

        • powerpowerpow
          powerpowerpow
          December 19, 2021 at 7:12 am | #

          Exhibit A: Ghost Mike, who is a literal 2D cutout of Mike. He doesn’t even have shadows!

    • Kyrik Michalowski
      Kyrik Michalowski
      December 19, 2021 at 12:17 am | #

      I feel like grossness is relative, she’s certainly not her father but she is not innocent either.

      I’ll give her a solid 7/10

    • The Wellerman
      The Wellerman
      December 19, 2021 at 12:18 am | #

      Maybe she’s trying to cure her self — by grossing herself out to the point to which she downright vomits out all her melancholy.

      I sure HOPE it’s just her lack of sleep that’s making her do this though.

      • C.T. Phipps
        C.T. Phipps
        December 19, 2021 at 12:18 am | #

        Like I said, she’s been living with Joe’s family. It’s entirely possible they’re influencing her social norms.

    • brute
      brute
      December 19, 2021 at 5:10 am | #

      i still holding out hope that she’s sabotaging herself out of self-loathing / guilt.

      • Queezle
        Queezle
        December 19, 2021 at 5:44 am | #

        That is my hope too.
        I am weirdly torn between still feeling really, really bad for her and being super grossed out by her.
        Either way she needs Therapy like yesterday.

        • Sirksome
          Sirksome
          December 19, 2021 at 10:26 am | #

          Apparently Amber already is in therapy. She said as much in her first appearance this arc. It was just sprinkled in a bit of dialogue for a passing joke and it has never been shown so it’s pretty hard to retain as credible but it is possibly happening.

    • Keulen
      Keulen
      December 19, 2021 at 8:59 am | #

      Faz still exists, though we haven’t seen him in a while.

      • alongcameaspider
        alongcameaspider
        December 19, 2021 at 5:18 pm | #

        Iirc last we saw Faz he was learning not to be as gross

  8. Stephen Bierce
    Stephen Bierce
    December 19, 2021 at 12:14 am | #

    *plays Weird Al’s “Eat It” on the hacked Muzak*

  9. Agemegos
    Agemegos
    December 19, 2021 at 12:17 am | #

    DMs?

    Not Doc Martens, I take it.

    • Dunedon
      Dunedon
      December 19, 2021 at 12:23 am | #

      Direct messages

      • Agemegos
        Agemegos
        December 19, 2021 at 12:25 am | #

        In which case: I don’t understand what Sal is saying.

        • alongcameaspider
          alongcameaspider
          December 19, 2021 at 12:29 am | #

          “Slide into dms” is slang for “send someone a message in the hopes of hooking up”

        • BBCC
          BBCC
          December 19, 2021 at 1:07 am | #

          You might know them better as PMs. Private messages. On a website, this means sending others a message that is not posted publicly where everyone could see it, whether that be a social media website, a forum, etc.

          • Rectilinear Propagation
            Rectilinear Propagation
            December 19, 2021 at 12:59 pm | #

            Ah, the tech company urge to call something that already has a well established term something different for no good reason.

  10. Mr. Random
    Mr. Random
    December 19, 2021 at 12:18 am | #

    I feel like Willis is going to have to start a full 4th webcomic if he ever wants to write about the complex relational dynamics of a polycule.

    • Doctor_Who
      Doctor_Who
      December 19, 2021 at 12:20 am | #

      Isn’t there a;ready canonically one in this webcomic? Mandy/Grace/Sierra?

      He could just do a storyline about them.

      • PirateTawnee
        PirateTawnee
        December 19, 2021 at 12:24 am | #

        I’d love this, but they seem (relatively) happy and drama free, why hurt those poor, sweet babies?

        • alongcameaspider
          alongcameaspider
          December 19, 2021 at 12:26 am | #

          Imagine he does like a week or two of them being well adjusted and not having any drama

          • AGV
            AGV
            December 19, 2021 at 12:43 am | #

            Not in MY formerly christian comic

          • Delicious Taffy
            Delicious Taffy
            December 19, 2021 at 2:03 am | #

            People would whine that it wasn’t realistic or something, because the only possible source of entertainment is horribly overwrought interpersonal melodrama. Not MY opinion, mind you, but that’d be the complaint.

            • Jon
              Jon
              December 19, 2021 at 3:48 am | #

              I mean it would be pretty weird for that specific storyline to be totally healthy and mature when literally no other storyline in the entire comic has been

              • Delicious Taffy
                Delicious Taffy
                December 19, 2021 at 4:05 am | #

                That’s a good thing. Nobody would know how to react. We’d have to completely upturn the comments-section response formula for a bit.

            • Thag Simmons
              Thag Simmons
              December 19, 2021 at 12:29 pm | #

              Eh, we’ve Grace and Mandy scrap a bit. They clearly like each other a lot, and I’m rooting for them to turn out well considering how badly things went for them in the old comic, but they’re not a perfectly drama free couple.

              Not entirely sure what the dynamic becomes once Sierra gets involved.

      • alongcameaspider
        alongcameaspider
        December 19, 2021 at 12:24 am | #

        I’d love a storyline focused on the side characters

        • The Wellerman
          The Wellerman
          December 19, 2021 at 12:27 am | #

          Yeah! The could offer help to the mains, like polyamorous wonder pets!!!

          • alongcameaspider
            alongcameaspider
            December 19, 2021 at 12:30 am | #

            Honestly I’m more imagining them doing their own thing while the main plots drama goes on in the background

            • Thag Simmons
              Thag Simmons
              December 19, 2021 at 12:35 am | #

              So Walking With Dina except even less tied to the main plot?

              • Thag Simmons
                Thag Simmons
                December 19, 2021 at 12:37 am | #

                Specifically thinking about the section with the LGBT+ support meeting, in which Dina is mostly a camera, the bits with Toedad and Becky are pretty main plot significant.

        • Hazel
          Hazel
          December 19, 2021 at 12:27 am | #

          Perhaps a short patreon side story? Or a extra in the books.

        • BBCC
          BBCC
          December 19, 2021 at 1:07 am | #

          I mean, the last one we did saw a TON of expansion on Dina’s character and she catapulted into the core cast pretty quick. Before that, she was around but she didn’t pop up near as often and wasn’t as focused on.

          • Thag Simmons
            Thag Simmons
            December 19, 2021 at 12:30 pm | #

            That is sort of the thing with doing a side-character focused episode. Once you’re done you tend to want them to be more than a side character, especially in an ensemble cast that can afford to grow

      • Spencer
        Spencer
        December 19, 2021 at 7:47 am | #

        According to the It’s Walky! commentary, after being killed in the final battle against the JFO Mandy, Grace and Sierra were eventually brought back using the Martian Resurrection Chamber and now run a cute little cafe.

        • Thag Simmons
          Thag Simmons
          December 19, 2021 at 12:40 pm | #

          I kind of wish we got to see that as a Shortpacked! april fools strip. It sounded charming. Grace and Mandy deserve a happy ending, Sierra is great, and Guns would also be there.

    • Rose by Any Other Name
      Rose by Any Other Name
      December 19, 2021 at 1:53 am | #

      I’d read it.

    • Doki
      Doki
      December 19, 2021 at 2:06 am | #

      (This comment goes on a bit of a tangent, warning in advance. Just ignore it if you want to!)

      Eh. Not every poly relationship is as complicated as some people (mostly monogamous people, from what I’ve seen) insist. It’s a little harder if not everyone is dating each other, but if you have, say, a triad of people all with each other? Not any more difficult than a couple IMO.

      Of course, this is just in my experience – I know some poly relationships aren’t easy, especially if any of the people involved are particularly dramatic LOL. I’m just always confused how people take if as a given you can pretty easily have more than one BFF, but make it romantic and suddenly it’s supposedly SUPER COMPLEX. (Often with a side of “nothing against those weirdos, of course, but I just couldn’t be poly, it’s not for me”, whiiich starts to sound a whole lot like how some people talk about being queer. I know that’s not how every monogamous person talks about polyamory, but I’ve definitely noticed some similarities. But maybe that’s just me being extra cynical as someone both queer and poly, haha.)

      But yeah tangent aside I’d always be down for more poly representation. 😀

      • Azhrei Vep
        Azhrei Vep
        December 19, 2021 at 8:16 am | #

        ” I’m just always confused how people take if as a given you can pretty easily have more than one BFF …”

        Wait, hold up. That doesn’t even make any sense. You can’t have more than one BFF. It’s right there in the name: “Best Friend Forever.” There can’t be multiple bests, that goes against the meaning of the word. By definition, only one friend can be best, and everyone else has to settle for some lesser friend position.

        The forever part also doesn’t make any sense, now that I think about it. Neither of you are going to last that long.

        • Doki
          Doki
          December 21, 2021 at 2:10 am | #

          OH uh… I guess I’ve always been poly in terms of best friends too haha?

          What other relationship conventions am I getting so wrong OMG

      • thejeff
        thejeff
        December 19, 2021 at 10:15 am | #

        There’s also a level on which romantic relationships already tend to be more difficult to manage than even close friendships.
        I suspect that poly might be for me in many ways, but I’m barely capable of managing one romance.

        • Doki
          Doki
          December 21, 2021 at 2:12 am | #

          I… disagree that they’re so different by default. But maybe that’s just me and how I approach my relationships?

          I will say it helps a LOT with logistics if everyone in your polycule is also with each other, though. There have definitely been some poly situations I’ve heard of where even I’m like NOPE TOO COMPLEX

  11. Amelie Wikström
    Amelie Wikström
    December 19, 2021 at 12:18 am | #

    Still no confirmation re. the hand not being in her pants. . .

    • Keulen
      Keulen
      December 19, 2021 at 9:02 am | #

      Kinda hoping she hasn’t had her hand in her pants this whole conversation, though with how creepy Amber’s been lately I wouldn’t be surprised.

  12. C.T. Phipps
    C.T. Phipps
    December 19, 2021 at 12:19 am | #

    Joe is no longer the 2nd most sexist member of his family.

  13. BBCC
    BBCC
    December 19, 2021 at 12:20 am | #

    Look, Sal, you sat at the horny table. These are your consequences.

    • Kyrik Michalowski
      Kyrik Michalowski
      December 19, 2021 at 12:21 am | #

      Is that Danny’s excuse too?

      • BBCC
        BBCC
        December 19, 2021 at 12:26 am | #

        Look at the last panel. Danny is CONTRIBUTING to this being the horny table.

    • Throwatron
      Throwatron
      December 19, 2021 at 7:01 pm | #

      Sal knows her way around the horny table. She just consumes responsibly.

      Eh, semi-responsibly.

  14. Alanari
    Alanari
    December 19, 2021 at 12:24 am | #

    Um. Amber, Sal is a lot less tolerant when it comes to disrespectful behaviour. This is a really bad idea.
    Also, I’d love to see Sal go check on ethan. Not expecting it to happen. But still, I’d love to. That would be interesting.

  15. Kirtro
    Kirtro
    December 19, 2021 at 12:26 am | #

    No one is owed a threesome!

    Is Amber being made this awful to try and make Joyce looks better in comparison? Wouldn’t work anyway, December has given me enough seasonal depression to be bitter enough at BOTH > _ >

    • BBCC
      BBCC
      December 19, 2021 at 1:05 am | #

      I don’t think Amber’s serious about Ethan being OWED anything.

      • Throwatron
        Throwatron
        December 19, 2021 at 7:01 pm | #

        I mean, she means it in the sense that she thinks it’s a great angle to manipulate her friend to do what she wants, because she might be able to get him to believe that bullshit, to the point that it motivates him do do what she wants. You know, like manipulation. She’s being manipulative. Doesn’t really matter if she believes what she’s saying, or not. It’s a goal-oriented form of social aggression.

        Can I lay it on any thicker, or are we good?

  16. Thag Simmons
    Thag Simmons
    December 19, 2021 at 12:28 am | #

    Okay, if this is how Amber has been acting since Mike’s death I wouldn’t really blame Ethan for cutting ties.

  17. lia
    lia
    December 19, 2021 at 12:29 am | #

    damn daniel okay

  18. EAG46
    EAG46
    December 19, 2021 at 12:29 am | #

    Two things. a} Amber desperately needs some therapy. Intensive. Possibly time in a good hospital. b} I wish Sal realized she’s become the voice of sanity in this group. Or at least, relative sanity. [She does know that she’s hot, right?]

  19. Yotomoe
    Yotomoe
    December 19, 2021 at 12:49 am | #

    Me and Danny. Same wavelength these days. I even had a hat and a Ukulele in college! Yeah I was that dick!

    • The Wellerman
      The Wellerman
      December 19, 2021 at 12:51 am | #

      You’d also eat food off the horny table? 😛

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        December 19, 2021 at 12:56 am | #

        I’d eat food off of most tables but ESPECIALLY horny tables.

  20. Carms
    Carms
    December 19, 2021 at 1:04 am | #

    this is weirdly untense tension.
    I guess the like, moving average of tension between Sal and the AmberAlgamation is still PRETTY FUKEN HIGH so while this would be pretty serious tension between Regular people, it’s not much of a blip on their interpersonal landscape

  21. WanderingLynx
    WanderingLynx
    December 19, 2021 at 1:16 am | #

    OK AMBER THAT’S ENOUGH i passed out last night so I didn’t get to comment TwT But holy shit, while it’s funny in a weird way, I’m glad Sal stopped this on its tracks. And I actually think she nailed the actual motivation on this.

    Like, yes Amber is a horny mess who gets off to slash daydreams of people who’re actually in her life; but also… It’s possible she believes that while she doesn’t have a way to cheer Ethan up, Danny could. If they were talking enough to bone, at least. Because everything about those two including the way Ethan talks about him are very much fanfic tropes, and it’d be even more if there was some addition of Healing Cock.

    • WanderingLynx
      WanderingLynx
      December 19, 2021 at 1:18 am | #

      Lots of ACKSHUALLY in that comment which shows I’m tired as hell but yeah. Forever sad that there won’t be a Sal/Danny/Amber OT3 tho

    • The Wellerman
      The Wellerman
      December 19, 2021 at 1:46 am | #

      You passed out last night?

      Well, nice to know you’re OK!

    • Doki
      Doki
      December 19, 2021 at 2:08 am | #

      Yeah, this. I think this might be some weird manifestation of Amber’s guilt toward how Ethan ended up. :C

  22. Bluewind
    Bluewind
    December 19, 2021 at 1:39 am | #

    Hello yes I would like to suspend Amber’s shipper credentials for code violations and operating a ship without a permit or clearance.

    • Thag Simmons
      Thag Simmons
      December 19, 2021 at 1:51 am | #

      Eh, people respect Pirates more than Privateers anyways

      • Bluewind
        Bluewind
        December 19, 2021 at 3:45 am | #

        Depends on the flag you fly

        • Thag Simmons
          Thag Simmons
          December 19, 2021 at 12:48 pm | #

          It’s cool to try to live outside the control of colonial empires, and people who took a letter of mark are sellouts who deserved to get smashed like a bowl of eggs actually

          • Leorale
            Leorale
            December 19, 2021 at 2:32 pm | #

            The only difference between a pirate and a privateer is whether the ruler said it was OK today.

            Francis Drake doesn’t really care who he’s plundering — knight him, write that letter of marque, and set him on the Spanish Armada!

            (Plus, Queen Elizabeth gets a layer of plausible deniability: whoops, sorry Spain, Drake will be Drake! I’ll give him such a stern talking-to when he gets back to England and shares all that wealth with me.)

            A letter of marque also makes a difference to what happens if you get caught. Privateers are supposed to follow laws of war, so they’re to be treated as POWs, whereas pirates are hanged immediately. (I don’t know whether privateers typically followed those rules. But, if you get captured, you definitely want to have your permission slip ready.)

            Sometimes pirates would get fake letters of marque, just like they flew fake flags, so there was a whole court system about it. (There were quirks here, too – like maybe you thought you were an Irish privateer under James II, but the English court doesn’t recognize James II’s rebellion, so you get hanged as a pirate.)

            ANYWAY it is interesting, and it’s probably for the best that we don’t do it anymore.

            • Leorale
              Leorale
              December 19, 2021 at 2:35 pm | #

              Let it be known — Amber’s letter of marque has been revoked; she is at war with the world.

              • Bluewind
                Bluewind
                December 19, 2021 at 6:00 pm | #

                Agreed

            • Bluewind
              Bluewind
              December 19, 2021 at 5:59 pm | #

              On the subject of pilates, the color of the flag was VERY important. In the 1600s, privateers flew red flags and those that eventually turned pirate continued the practice which eventually just became a pirate thing. The black flag was adopted by pirates due to it being used to signal a plague ship and thus not one to be messed with. The colors were given meaning with black indicated that those who did not fight would live (the pirates taking valuables and/or prisoners) and was meant to intimidate their target to surrender without a fight while red meant no quarter would be given (no survivors). These flags were also not meant to fly all the time with pirates flying “friendly colors” (the flag of some nation) until they were close to a target.

              Any pirate flag was called a Jolly Roger regardless of design or lack thereof. In fact, no design was the standard for a long time and what most still used even when some started adding embellishments. Embellishments would usually be in white, but yellow or red were also used. The imbelishmnts were usually various symbols of death, violence, and the devil, but symbols of time, lacking shame, or the captain could be used and some had initials (either alone or with other things) to represent the captains initials (either name or alias) or their enemies. Very VERY few of the embellished flags survived meaning the examples we know of are mostly due to eyewitness accounts that were usually vague. Two skull and crossbone flags have survived (none from the golden age of piracy), one red with realistic bones sitting at an angle and the other is black and a little more realistic than the one usually see, A third is black and cartoonish, but might be fake.

              • Sev
                Sev
                December 22, 2021 at 6:43 am | #

                It’s comments like this and Leorale’s above that make me glad I kept reading down the comment section 🙂

    • Plain Marie
      Plain Marie
      December 19, 2021 at 9:44 am | #

      I’d sign that ticket.

  23. newlland(Henryvolt)
    newlland(Henryvolt)
    December 19, 2021 at 1:48 am | #

    You heard her Amber drop it and stop trying to get Danny to Dan this up, out of all the new pairs this is one I want to see last the most.

  24. Bagge
    Bagge
    December 19, 2021 at 3:39 am | #

    Clearly Sal doesn’t read the same fanfics as Amber

    • Needfuldoer
      Needfuldoer
      December 19, 2021 at 9:28 pm | #

      Amber has a continuous news ticker of original horny fanfiction scrolling across her field of vision at all times.

  25. Jon
    Jon
    December 19, 2021 at 3:44 am | #

    Oh my god, please bring back preachy atheist Joyce, I would like to be NOWHERE near this Amber scene

    • King Daniel
      King Daniel
      December 19, 2021 at 5:27 am | #

      A finger on the monkey’s paw curls…

      • thumb
        thumb
        December 19, 2021 at 5:32 am | #

        Joyce shows up in the middle of this conversation . . .

        • J. Gawain
          J. Gawain
          December 19, 2021 at 8:45 am | #

          And she starts agreeing with Amber…

          • thejeff
            thejeff
            December 19, 2021 at 10:19 am | #

            It kind of makes sense.

            Danny’s giving up on being queer to be with a girl. Must be the fear of hell.

            • Throwatron
              Throwatron
              December 19, 2021 at 6:57 pm | #

              Willis would never do this, because he wouldn’t write a storyline where Joyce fucking gets murdered.

          • Spencer
            Spencer
            December 19, 2021 at 11:06 am | #

            That does make me wonder how Joyce feels about Sinful Horniness nowadays.

            She ogled Joe’s absolute dump truck ass that one time but she’ll write President Doris as an amoral lust machine since Captain Julia Grey is pure.

            • Thag Simmons
              Thag Simmons
              December 19, 2021 at 12:49 pm | #

              I assume she feels a lot of things, many of which are contradictory

            • alongcameaspider
              alongcameaspider
              December 19, 2021 at 1:09 pm | #

              I wonder how Becky would react if Joyce got over her hangup about sexual stuff before she did

              • Throwatron
                Throwatron
                December 19, 2021 at 6:58 pm | #

                okay now see THAT would be a funny thing for that storyline to come around to. I would fucking DIE to see the look on Becky’s face lmao

    • Keulen
      Keulen
      December 19, 2021 at 8:56 am | #

      I still prefer atheist Joyce over fundie Christian Joyce, though the huge arguments in the comments every time she appears are getting really old.

    • Amós Batista
      Amós Batista
      December 19, 2021 at 12:09 pm | #

      Dumbing of Age is a soap opera. Everyone appears in each book. Something one page, or more pages. Some times, everyone at one page.

      • King Daniel
        King Daniel
        December 19, 2021 at 10:24 pm | #

        Ethan didn’t appear at all in the last book.

  26. Hopey
    Hopey
    December 19, 2021 at 3:46 am | #

    On the one hand, Amber is a nightmare, on the other hand, Sal and Danny in the same panel gives me life.

  27. AlexaSpuds
    AlexaSpuds
    December 19, 2021 at 3:53 am | #

    damn amber is really shitty here, both in attitude and in strategy.
    like if you’re gonna go full asshat and try to hook up ethan and danny you gotta at least be smart enough about it to not get into a mexican standoff with your athletic equal.

  28. Chazkuangshi
    Chazkuangshi
    December 19, 2021 at 3:55 am | #

    I like this throuple

    More so as besties but take it or leave it

  29. jeffepp
    jeffepp
    December 19, 2021 at 4:11 am | #

    She didn’t say she wasn’t open to fourples…

  30. Lan
    Lan
    December 19, 2021 at 4:27 am | #

    Daniel.

  31. StClair
    StClair
    December 19, 2021 at 4:57 am | #

    Let’s be honest: Amber in panel 4 is not sincerely/in good faith arguing “you owe him for (X)”, but “I’ll say anything if it might get you all to Perform a Sex for my voyeuristic entertainment.”

  32. Rabisch
    Rabisch
    December 19, 2021 at 7:16 am | #

    Sal and Danny are a couple of very wise person. Amber has to resolve her own problems alone, not dragging into it others for make they do all the work. But I’m having a doubt. Has Sal understood that Amber is talking about Danny AND Ethan?

    • DrunkenNordmann
      DrunkenNordmann
      December 19, 2021 at 8:43 am | #

      She’s understanding that Amber’s intruding on her relationship and she’s having none of it.

      • zee
        zee
        December 19, 2021 at 9:19 am | #

        Rabisch’s grav looks like a sculpture of your grav

        • JBento
          JBento
          December 19, 2021 at 12:13 pm | #

          Btw, good call yesterday. Now, give me the lotto numbers, zeetradamus.

  33. Spencer
    Spencer
    December 19, 2021 at 8:05 am | #

    … these two are gonna shatter each others’ pelvises when they finally do it.

    • Needfuldoer
      Needfuldoer
      December 19, 2021 at 8:13 am | #

      Death by Snu-Snu!

      (But which two?)

    • zee
      zee
      December 19, 2021 at 9:19 am | #

      I would launder money for that slipshine

      • Spencer
        Spencer
        December 19, 2021 at 10:30 am | #

        I ain’t gonna lie, Danny being sexually forward lately has been doing things to me.

        • Throwatron
          Throwatron
          December 19, 2021 at 6:56 pm | #

          Confident Danny is what actually makes men sexy, but there’s no way for men to understand that if they start out unconfident because they think their looks or whatever are important. If the way you look comes off as fucking intentionally put-together, that’s all that really matters for men. Even if you think you’re fuck-ugly. The reality is, girls have broader aesthetic tastes on average than men, and if you have a weird face, a huge number of girls still think that face is hotter than Brad Pitt, because he’s conventionally sexy and that’s generic and boring and they’re bored of looking at him.

  34. JBento
    JBento
    December 19, 2021 at 8:42 am | #

    Amber’s right hand is still a no-show.

    • J. Gawain
      J. Gawain
      December 19, 2021 at 8:48 am | #

      At this point I’ve given up on believing that its not in her pants. The only doubt I have is that Mind Mike could be telling her to keep that hand hidden specifically to mess with Danny.

  35. Spencer
    Spencer
    December 19, 2021 at 8:59 am | #

    I do actually wonder if Amber’s trying to get her main relationships in the comic (Danny, Ethan, and Sal) together in the hopes of isolating herself.

    Not like “oh Amber has secret hero reasons for verbally jilling off” but more like it’s the endpoint.

    • Rani
      Rani
      December 19, 2021 at 9:19 am | #

      But they already don’t hang out with her.

      • Spencer
        Spencer
        December 19, 2021 at 9:33 am | #

        Sal does at roller derby. Danny doesn’t actively seek her out but never resented her company, and Ethan will come around eventually.

        I think it’s more setting up a scenario where the people she has that intimate and visceral history with are Over There, and she is not.

        • RedCat
          RedCat
          December 19, 2021 at 10:07 am | #

          I think at Roller Derby, that’s Amazi Girl, not Amber.

          • Spencer
            Spencer
            December 19, 2021 at 10:32 am | #

            Well yes, but Amber’s still there.

  36. Zaxares
    Zaxares
    December 19, 2021 at 9:05 am | #

    Danny, just eat off Sal’s ass and skip the intervening step. I’m fairly confident Sal will like it better too. 😉

  37. Rani
    Rani
    December 19, 2021 at 9:09 am | #

    Here’s a thought-what if this is a new alter?

    • Throwatron
      Throwatron
      December 19, 2021 at 6:54 pm | #

      Yeah, I’m sure Amber would love for you to think that. She’d love to think that, herself. If someone were to suggest it to her, she’d probably decide it’s true, and then decide that it’s her own idea.

  38. Deviant
    Deviant
    December 19, 2021 at 9:18 am | #

    Louder, Danny. So that they both hear it clearly.

  39. zee
    zee
    December 19, 2021 at 9:24 am | #

    I’m done trying not to be harsh on amber, i don’t even care if this is a depression fueled self sabotage, it’s also insane levels of sexual harassment. You can’t reason out sexual harassment with “oh i was going through such and such” “oh i didn’t realize that recontextualizes things let’s talk it out bro”, this is just a gross objectification and infringement on her friends. And i hate when people project but yeah, “friends” reducing friends to sexual objects hits close to home. Just. Fuck you Amber.
    If this turns out to be like, the mike alter taking over I’m going to be annoyed, but i doubt willis will go there.

    Sal is hot. Sal is good. I like sal here. I want Sal/Danny time.

    • Spencer
      Spencer
      December 19, 2021 at 9:40 am | #

      I mean, be harsh, yeah.

      She’s doing something wrong, she’s doing something viscerally hateful to me as a person, I do feel genuinely disgusted with her in the moment.

      Is she these moments, though? I hate her right now, I hate that she thinks things that real people that I hate do, but even those people I hate are more than those moments even if those moments are enough for me to hate them without any real care to the contrary.

      • JBento
        JBento
        December 19, 2021 at 12:15 pm | #

        We are ALL our moments.

  40. Plain Marie
    Plain Marie
    December 19, 2021 at 9:42 am | #

    As usual, Sal is cutting right to the heart of it.

  41. TrueVCU
    TrueVCU
    December 19, 2021 at 11:57 am | #

    In which Danny joins Amber in Horny Jail

  42. DarkoNeko
    DarkoNeko
    December 19, 2021 at 12:43 pm | #

    Amber, I want to see your other hand.

  43. Bunivasal
    Bunivasal
    December 19, 2021 at 12:46 pm | #

    I’m just going to say it: this whole deal is like a million times grosser than anything Joe has ever done

    • alongcameaspider
      alongcameaspider
      December 19, 2021 at 12:56 pm | #

      The list comes close but it was never meant to be public and if I recall correctly didn’t use real names

      • Spencer
        Spencer
        December 19, 2021 at 3:18 pm | #

        It was public in the sense that he handed it to anyone who’d ask. He didn’t just numerically rate the women around him, he also put in little notes and commentary on how to score.

        Rachel revealed she wasn’t the one who leaked it, because she would never leak a glossary of women on campus made by some creepy sex hound a few days after a predator was made into a pin cushion.

    • Throwatron
      Throwatron
      December 19, 2021 at 6:38 pm | #

      Yeah, but Joe is a boy doing naughty heterosexual casual sex. That carries the baggage of systemic oppression through authoritative power structures, so it’s automatically gross and wrong to the max, because it represents that thing we all already don’t like. That means he’s a monster who is part of the problem.

      Amber is our little mentally ill bean, and she needs 100% all of our support all the time, and we must never criticize anything she does! And this is tangentially queer, and tangentially progressive in nature, and will make gay shit happen, so it has to be not so bad, or else you’re homophobic and polyphobic, and you just don’t like it because you’re a regressive troll.

      She must be thoroughly woobified at all times, and given the biggest benefit of the doubt because we have decided that any character in a comic who has poor social skills, is autistic-coded, so it isn’t their fault, and it makes it normal for to act like them making utterly destructive choices and be borderline abusive, because everybody knows autistic people are practically children and we just can’t expect them to take responsibility for their actions, and hold them to any kind of scrutiny because they’re oh so wooby and disadvantaged…

      Except there is a literal autistic character in the comic, and while her social skills are constantly the butt of the characters joke in-universe, she is practically one of the most socially adept characters in the comic, and is theliteral voice of reason. Amber is definitely mentally ill. She also, when she is sick, engages in personal and inter-personal behaviors so broadly destructive related to her poor impulse control, related to her physical emotions, that are all her responsibility not to perform, to a completely reasonable degree – all while using her general fear of actual introspection to mislead herself about her own intentions. She is trying to blow up Danny and Sal’s relationship, because she doesn’t like the way it feels for her. That is what she is trying to do, deep down. She’s just convinced herself, conveniently, that she is blind to that, because she doesn’t want it to be true, and so she’s substituting her extreme horniness as a surrogate explanation for her behavior, to both herself and others, so she can do the thing she wants to do, without actually believing she is doing it, because she wants to do it for a reason that feels like she didn’t have control of, such as her horniness, because she is too hideously narcissistic to accept that she wants to do a bad thing which she knows is wrong, to correct her bad feeling related to Danny and Sal dating, but also too full of herself to “actually do a bad thing, like I’m not supposed to, like I always do, because I’m garbage,” so she needs to find an alternative reason to do the bad thing, that isn’t “about” the bad thing, so her poor impulse control still gets to do exactly what it wants, she gets exactly what she wants, and she doesn’t feel responsible for the outcome, yet the thing that made her feel bad no longer exists, so everything is great for Amber.

      Amber is partially blind to this, yeah. It’s very difficult to unpack 20 years of narcissistic abuse when it’s so deep that it’s the literal foundation of your personality. But Bunivasal is right: this is way way way way way way way way WAY grosser and more directly abusive than anything Joe has every done, and it’s not even close. If you’re reading this, and you just really really really feel the need to defend her behavior, because she’s the main character or the character you like, or whatever, I really implore you to think of it out of context. Like, literally, if Joe were doing this right now, would you be setting alight the pyre? What if, like, Asher was doing it? Or another character we already do not like, and are naturally suspicious of?

      • Throwatron
        Throwatron
        December 19, 2021 at 6:52 pm | #

        Sorry about the poor formatting and run-ons, but I’m so not used to BBcode anymore, and I also just didn’t want to properly edit this month. The reality is, I lived the Amber x Ethan co-dependent friendship for over a decade. Amber either gets better, or doesn’t. Let me tell you, if it doesn’t seem like it, Ethan is totally in the right, here, and if you don’t get that, you need to see Amber’s life-long behavioral patterns from his perspective. She can easily repair their friendship right now, but it would involve her doing some friend work to actually help Ethan with his problems, which she is terminally unwilling to do, and it would involve her actually coping with her bad feelings, whether constructively, or just, at all, instead of trying to rope Ethan into hijinks to change the source of those feelings for her, so she can have additional plausible deniability that she didn’t just do the bad thing she wanted to do, because she could do it, and then use her poor impulse control and strong feelings related to her trauma as an excuse.

        Let me tell you, I wish to death that I was still friends with my Amber. I still love her. But I also know damn well, the over-under on people like Amber in the real world is that they will not successfully improve or change, even with immense support around them, and if they are too destructive to your own life or your own health because of that fact, you will get much healthier when they discard you for having the audacity to put up basic boundaries. Ethan is huge in the right, here. Amber has treated him like shit. Amber treats everyone like shit, because she treats herself like shit, because she was taught to treat herself like shit by a person who treated her like shit because he thought she was shit. But the only think Amber knows with certainty, is that literally nobody else will look out for number one, and because her moral spectrum is fucking children’s comic books, her need for basic self-advocacy guarantees she will be needy, which means she will have to take help from people, which means she is taking what she has no right to possess from them, which means she is inherently a bad evil villain who can only take from people, and that’s an innate part of what she is, and she can’t change that because people can’t change because everything is black and white. The problem is, since being better seems impossible, because her self-esteem is zero, this belief about herself is more comforting and freeing a conceit, than a problem, since it’s not her fault and she can’t change it, so people have to accept it, or abandon her like she deserves. She will act terribly to anyone who will put up with her, and then take their eventual withdrawal as a fated abandonment which was inevitable because of how uniquely bad they are, and then resent being alone and find somebody else who will put up with their abuse, because the alternative is accepting that they are literally in control of, and responsible for, their own actions.

  44. Icalasari
    Icalasari
    December 19, 2021 at 12:59 pm | #

    THANK YOU SAL FOR SAVINH DANNY THERE

    God Amber was creepy as all hell

  45. Beau Kirin Maysey
    Beau Kirin Maysey
    December 19, 2021 at 2:11 pm | #

    oh boy i cant wait to see the comment section’s prescient and totally-supportive thoughts on polyamory y a y y y

    • albi is flummoxxxed
      albi is flummoxxxed
      December 19, 2021 at 3:27 pm | #

      There’s polyamory, and then there’s… creepy shit like this just because it’ll allow hawt mlm action. Don’t get it twisted.

      Amber’s already being weirdly gross with her IRL Yaoi Fangirl shipping, but if Sal isn’t cool with non-monogamy, that’s the end of the discussion.

      SRC: actually polyamorous and skeeved out at potentially toxic situations such as this one.

      • StClair
        StClair
        December 19, 2021 at 6:22 pm | #

        yeah, this is someone wanting a live-action Slipshine for her benefit.

    • Throwatron
      Throwatron
      December 19, 2021 at 6:17 pm | #

      There’s maybe one more webcomic other than this whose comments section I’d expect to be more generally supportive of polygamy than this one, like this is one of the most thoroughly and intentionally progressive strips and communities out there?

      • albi is flummoxxxed
        albi is flummoxxxed
        December 19, 2021 at 8:35 pm | #

        Typically I just drop a one-liner and forget to check comments, but… I’m just… genuinely annoyed that the pushback against Amber’s idea here is being misconstrued(?) as hating on polyamory, where the majority of us (OK, me and at least one other person) are taking issue with the toxicity on display here.

        Note that the Sierra/Mandy/Grace polycule has been much more positively received.

    • Needfuldoer
      Needfuldoer
      December 19, 2021 at 9:26 pm | #

      If all involved parties are cool with a polyamorous relationship, that’s perfectly fine.

      If someone is pressuring someone else into a polyamorous relationship when they’re clearly not cool with it, that’s not fine at all.

  46. SeasideSun
    SeasideSun
    December 19, 2021 at 2:20 pm | #

    as much as I love polyamory and thruples, i don’t think this one would be healthy or interesting right now. I’ll ship a polycule involving Becky, Joyce, Dorothy, and Dina, but uh yeah no Ethan, Danny, and Sal just aren’t a good fit imo. I used to want Danny and Ethan to be together too, but it’s clear that won’t work, especially right now, anymore than Joyce would be able to have a healthy relationship with . . . anyone? oof

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May 3, 2025 - FCBD @ Laughing Ogre Comics in Columbus, Ohio

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David M Willis!
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2h
today in #9chickweedlane i learned we have to be shown children learning and relearning what sex is, for Reasons, even though they already clearly know and have prepared nuanced questions about it! also that Gran must hate, if she's still alive, how Old Juliette is the same but with gray hair
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2h
one of my favorite things is when a commenter explodes WHEN DO THESE CHARACTERS GET THERAPY but directed towards a character who canonically has a regular therapist
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2h
www.ebay.com/itm/23609624... Three hours left on this murder machine
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mary: dawn says your girlfriend is trying to murder her wilbur: but what about MY happiness okay can we kill wilbur now
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 11h
help I had a big yawny stretch after I got into bed and threw out my back
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 11h
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Dotty
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fuck off
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 17h
Phew, they made NoHo Hank wear pants.
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 17h
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Hot Toys Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith 1/6 Scale Darth Vader Deluxe ($495) & Standard ($315) is up for preorder at Sideshow - shrsl.com/4wcx6 #ad If you preorder make sure to hit the Exclusive versions since they include a commemorative plaque and cost the same.
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Ryan North @ryannorth.ca ⋅ 1d
hey, FANTASTIC FOUR got an Eisner nomination for best ongoing series!! I think this news is... really great! Fantastic even :0
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 18h
oh no, new content over at the nsfw patreon joe introduces joyce to fingers that aren't breaded chicken www.patreon.com/posts/joe-fi...
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 19h
I may have to pin this
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btw if you're one of those rando bluesky weirdos who doesn't know me but sees me in the wild being sarcastic and don't know i'm being sarcastic because you haven't taken like 30 seconds to, like, maybe look at my user profile or something, keep walking, you're not going to score internet points here
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 1d
#relatable
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Politico: Ever been slapped by breasts?
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Joshua J. Friedman @joshuajfriedman.com ⋅ 2d
Here's an entertaining cite at the bottom of the first page
The problems with this prosecution are legion, but most immediately, the
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JUST IN: Milwaukee Judge Hannah Dugan moves to dismiss federal criminal case against her for allegedly helping immigrant hide from ICE. Her lawyers say she's protected by official acts & judicial immunity and 10th Amendment. Doc: storage.courtlistener.com/recap/gov.us...
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Where did Hollywood go so wrong? I thought movies were supposed to be an escape from reality, a chance to put your worries aside and not have to think about any underlying ideas or concepts. Well, not anymore. theonion.com/you-can...
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GOTTEM
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the 90s were a wild time. if i told you how many magazines there were you wouldnt even believe me
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It's not a new argument, of course, but Chesterton dismissed it effectively in 1908. "You will hear everlastingly... this argument that the rich man cannot be bribed. The fact is, of course, that the rich man is bribed; he has been bribed already. That is why he is a rich man."
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
(May 14, 2026)
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 2d
wilbur, savvy enough to know he's in a comic strip but still not a great actor, awkwardly lifts a muffin up into frame so that we, the audience, understand that he has a muffin right now, which is very important narratively, but he's not really selling it well as an organic, human action
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
i mean i... guess there are people who want toy-accurate hyper-articulated original-toy-look guys but in cartoon colors for some reason
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
Fuck you, Clayface!!!
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
www.ebay.com/itm/23609982... selling my LG34 Mindwipe, minus Servant
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
Menace Level: up to date on his vaccinations
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
Today in #9ChickweedLane I learned Gran is back from the grave so she can jerk it to furry porn with her daughter
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