Dumbing of Age Book Twelve

Dumbing of Age

A college webcomic by David Willis
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May 12, 2026

Confident

by David M Willis on September 13, 2012 at 12:01 am
  • 06 - Strange Beerfellows
└ Tags: ethan, joyce, mary, sierra

Discussion (182) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. David Herbert
    David Herbert
    September 13, 2012 at 12:02 am | #

    Daww she’s so cute and blushing. I’m gonna feel so bad when she realises her boy is into dudes.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      September 13, 2012 at 12:05 am | #

      She prefers dudes too so at least they have something in common.

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        September 13, 2012 at 12:15 am | #

        That and if they combined, they might turn into David Willis.

        • Kernanator
          Kernanator
          September 13, 2012 at 12:23 am | #

          “And I’ll form the head!”

          • Plasma Mongoose
            Plasma Mongoose
            September 13, 2012 at 12:31 am | #

            “Which head?” 😀

            • Tucker
              Tucker
              September 13, 2012 at 3:06 am | #

              AIEEEEEE!

              • Zoey
                Zoey
                September 13, 2012 at 6:17 am | #

                for shadowing XD

      • Jetstream
        Jetstream
        September 13, 2012 at 12:24 am | #

        They could cruise for dudes together.

        • Kai Gon
          Kai Gon
          September 13, 2012 at 4:33 am | #

          … and bang them together by sharing a nickel.

          • Khrene
            Khrene
            September 13, 2012 at 8:12 pm | #

            Nickels are only for Parents my friend, the will become Father- and possibly Uncle, Fuckers.

    • Kirt Dankmyer
      Kirt Dankmyer
      September 13, 2012 at 10:13 am | #

      Joyce is the cutest beard ever! Sadly, this is a realistic fate for someone of her background. I’ve known so many “good Christian girls” who had highly respectful gay boyfriends…

  2. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    September 13, 2012 at 12:02 am | #

    Last panel Joyce’s face looks so coy yet naughty.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      September 13, 2012 at 12:18 am | #

      Hello my name is Joyce
      I’m thinking thoughts with my voice
      I wanted to meet compatible boys
      And in church while I began to rejoice
      I suddenly started thinking very…nauuuuuughhhhhhtyyyyyyyy

      • Aizat
        Aizat
        September 13, 2012 at 12:20 am | #

        Next thing you know, Joyce suddenly have a thing for hair.

        • Luke
          Luke
          September 13, 2012 at 12:21 am | #

          And gerbils.

          • Aizat
            Aizat
            September 13, 2012 at 12:28 am | #

            And pink dogs.

            • Khrene
              Khrene
              September 13, 2012 at 8:23 pm | #

              Alongside the current chain of references to a specific cartoon, I’m also reminded of “Pink’s Hot Dogs,” which gives a disturbing image of of Joyce being into pink fleshy… Appendages…

      • Audiophillie
        Audiophillie
        September 13, 2012 at 12:20 am | #

        That voice was very happy in my head until I heard Freaky Fred.

        • Kaci
          Kaci
          September 15, 2012 at 1:42 am | #

          second

      • Rognik
        Rognik
        September 13, 2012 at 3:42 am | #

        Good poem, but I think your scanning rhythm is off. It’s too “broken” for me to even fix it easily. Good try, though!

        • Raticate5
          Raticate5
          September 13, 2012 at 9:29 am | #

          I’m about 90% sure that it’s a reference to a cartoon called Courage the Cowardly Dog.

          • GoldStarz
            GoldStarz
            September 13, 2012 at 6:46 pm | #

            Let me give you your missing 10%.

  3. Joe
    Joe
    September 13, 2012 at 12:03 am | #

    This’ll end well for everyone and there will be no hurt feelings.

    • Boom
      Boom
      September 13, 2012 at 12:06 am | #

      And there’ll be yummy cakes and delicious tea. And then Mr. Darcy will walk around the corner topless.

      • Rognik
        Rognik
        September 13, 2012 at 4:08 am | #

        Those cakes are an… absolute delight! But everything else is a lie.

        • Joe
          Joe
          September 13, 2012 at 8:50 am | #

          Drat, I really wanted some tea.

    • Audiophillie
      Audiophillie
      September 13, 2012 at 12:07 am | #

      I never expected Joe to say that.

    • Uncle Rylon
      Uncle Rylon
      September 13, 2012 at 1:32 am | #

      I smell sarcasm. Or someone who’s never read a Willis comic.

      But this is the internet, so I’m going with sarcasm.

      • Joe
        Joe
        September 13, 2012 at 8:48 am | #

        Mostly sarcasm. Even the best in-universe solution of Ethan actually truly falling for Joyce would draw hurt feelings from some readers.
        “Gay guy instantly cured by cute devout girl” generally doesn’t go over too well with gay audiences, myself included.
        Ethan hopping aboard the Extreme Denial Express for a few weeks would be more believable, more interesting to see unfold, and be a better story to tell.

        • begbert2
          begbert2
          September 13, 2012 at 10:38 am | #

          I literally cannot believe that Willis would do a “cure your gays” storyline. This is not his first gay character here. (Um, er, or is it? Blast these alternate continuities.) And while he’s done plenty of mean things to his gay characters, the closest he’s come to curing one is Malaya, which was actually a bait-and-switch (in universe, even).

          Of course, on the other hand this is Willis, and the “Damn you!” temptation may be tough for him to resist, but still…no.

          • BigMadDraco
            BigMadDraco
            September 13, 2012 at 11:41 am | #

            And even if Willis could do it well, Amber’s feelings would almost certainly be hurt.

          • Joe
            Joe
            September 13, 2012 at 3:42 pm | #

            I didn’t mean to imply that I thought he would, but looking back, I can see how that might come across. I don’t think he’d pull a “damn you Willis” with something like this. At least, not in that way.

          • cwDeici
            cwDeici
            September 20, 2012 at 10:41 am | #

            Ya know, these things DO happen. I’m not saying they should happen or that they’re frequent, just that they happen, like the reverse.

        • JepMZ
          JepMZ
          September 14, 2012 at 2:48 am | #

          I feel the same way! i remembered reading the Season 8 Buffy comic of this one particular plotline, and it got me so mad!! it was impossible for it to happen unless she was a little bi this whole time. But obviously she shown no interest to women in the previous 7 seasons.

  4. brasca1
    brasca1
    September 13, 2012 at 12:03 am | #

    So sweet and so sad when you know that this is inevitably going to fail. No wonder Mike is present.

    • Thor
      Thor
      September 13, 2012 at 12:07 am | #

      You call it sweet and sad. I call it tasty tasty schadenfreude.

      • Resne
        Resne
        September 13, 2012 at 2:32 am | #

        Best make sure you come early, Mike gorges himself on the stuff.

        • Legasher
          Legasher
          September 13, 2012 at 2:05 pm | #

          Turns out it’s great for weight loss.

        • Stevie Windup
          Stevie Windup
          September 13, 2012 at 6:13 pm | #

          Ah, so that’s why he showed up.

  5. Mkvenner
    Mkvenner
    September 13, 2012 at 12:03 am | #

    This is going to result in prom night all over again.

  6. Confuzor
    Confuzor
    September 13, 2012 at 12:04 am | #

    Thank God this isn’t a Friday strip!

    • Raine
      Raine
      September 13, 2012 at 12:26 am | #

      Seconded. I dont think my heart could take another cliffhanger after the shortpacked one last week. ;o;

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        September 13, 2012 at 12:43 am | #

        you’re going to jinx us all!!!!

        • begbert2
          begbert2
          September 13, 2012 at 10:40 am | #

          And tomorrow is DoA!’s first random Batman strip!

          …Though actually, this doesn’t feel like a cliffhanger to me; I could totally end a week on this. Presumably because he’s saving the bomb for tomorrow.

    • Joe
      Joe
      September 13, 2012 at 3:46 pm | #

      Only means tomorrow’s gonna be worse.

  7. Godly
    Godly
    September 13, 2012 at 12:04 am | #

    I actually think it would be really interesting if it turned out Ethan was actually bi and he and Joyce ended up together. Ethan as straight/bi actually is a concept that really interests me, because we could really screw with his character.

    IT’S AN ALTERNATE UNIVERSE, WE CAN DO WHATEVER WE WANT

    • Boom
      Boom
      September 13, 2012 at 12:09 am | #

      Bow chicka bow wow.

    • mnk
      mnk
      September 13, 2012 at 12:09 am | #

      Willis has said like a million times that Ethan is still gay in DoA, though.

      • Ben
        Ben
        September 13, 2012 at 12:15 am | #

        yeah but it’s not like Willis makes these characters.

        RIGHT?!

        • Boom
          Boom
          September 13, 2012 at 12:20 am | #

          Perfect combination of Gravatar and comment.

      • Godly
        Godly
        September 13, 2012 at 12:59 am | #

        Well, it’s kinda like squares and rectangles. Every square is a rectangle, but not every rectangle is a square. Every bi person is gay, but not every gay person is bi. Willis could have just been screwing with us a little. Or he’s secretly Michael Bay and constantly lying to us.

        You could be right, though. And then THAT could go 3 ways:
        1. Joyce understands.
        2. Joyce is devastated and becomes a bit depressing for a while, which would be interesting.
        3. Joyce realizes she has no luck with men and becomes a lesbian, which would be interesting and hawt.

        • ....
          ....
          September 13, 2012 at 1:52 am | #

          You’re mistaken.

          Bisexuality is not a subset of homosexuality(or heterosexuality, for that matter), as squares are to rectangles. Bisexuals are not gay when they are with a same-sex partner, and straight when they are with an opposite sex partner. They are bisexual. That’s why we have the term. They are (presumably) attracted to both genders (to varying degrees) at all times.

          Unless of course, you are dealing with someone whose sexuality is fluid, as is the case with more than a few people. Because people are complicated like that. If that’s the case, you go by whatever label they are giving themselves(which is generally just a good rule of thumb).

          This has been your lesson on sexuality and labels for the day.

        • Hatman
          Hatman
          September 13, 2012 at 6:24 am | #

          That makes zero sense. Gay and “into males” aren’t interchangeable.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      September 13, 2012 at 12:21 am | #

      If Ethan was bi, that would only make the soul-crushing break up with Amber and the sequential summer of damage control and strain of their relationship with each other all the more biting for Amber.

      • Godly
        Godly
        September 13, 2012 at 12:51 am | #

        And, that’s the way I like it. Soul-crushing.

        • Groove
          Groove
          September 13, 2012 at 3:48 am | #

          It would be a hell of a story. Ethan and Joyce fall for each other, Amber finds out, is crushed. Ethan is crushed as a result, confesses to Joyce that he also likes boys, Ethan is double-crushed. Joyce can’t handle the information, breaks it off, everyone lives miserablly ever after.

          Turns out it was Mike’s plan all along.

          • Godly
            Godly
            September 13, 2012 at 3:53 am | #

            Your avatar: PERFECT. Also, Joyce goes lesbian herself, deciding she can’t handle boys.

            • Yotomoe
              Yotomoe
              September 13, 2012 at 10:06 am | #

              Stop barking up the lesbian tree. It’s not that simple.

    • vlademir1
      vlademir1
      September 13, 2012 at 7:02 am | #

      *sighs*
      This idea of Ethan being bi is overthinking this. Willis has already had at least one person in his two continuities who found someone who was an exception to their preferred gender, there is no reason for Ethan to be bi for him to end up having a thing for Joyce.

      Personally I’m holding out hope for Joyce/Danny to have a shot eventually. Back in Roomies they were actually not a bad match, personality wise, except for Joyce’s overbearing stalkerish thing which isn’t on display here and time spent with Ethan is likely good for her to have some interests in common with Danny. Amber, meanwhile, seems to have moved on from Ethan and the nature of the Danny/Amazigirl thing leaves the door open when Danny realizes he wants more than her secret identity is willing to give him considering how that cliche typically works.

  8. Audiophillie
    Audiophillie
    September 13, 2012 at 12:05 am | #

    Ethan, why are you smiling?

    • Ryan Balis
      Ryan Balis
      September 13, 2012 at 12:09 am | #

      he’s dumb

    • twobeef
      twobeef
      September 13, 2012 at 2:44 am | #

      Because holding hands with girls is totally a gay guy thing to do.

    • Charles RB
      Charles RB
      September 13, 2012 at 7:59 am | #

      Because he’s been trying to pretend he’s not gay and it’s working.

      For now.

      And then it won’t.

      And I think my grabatar is too happy about that fact

    • kschenke
      kschenke
      September 13, 2012 at 8:45 am | #

      It could be that he saw it as a friendly encouragement and not flirting. He might not be able to see the blushing thing as well as we do.

  9. Uniqueantique
    Uniqueantique
    September 13, 2012 at 12:05 am | #

    Dum dum dum dum…….dum. Too bad.

  10. Luke
    Luke
    September 13, 2012 at 12:05 am | #

    What an adorable, innocent Joyce. Too bad her crush prefers eclairs to donuts.

    • milk experiment
      milk experiment
      September 13, 2012 at 12:09 am | #

      That’s the first time I’ve ever heard that metaphor, and I swear I’m going to find some occasion to use it in the future.

      • Luke
        Luke
        September 13, 2012 at 12:14 am | #

        Feel free to do so. You would not believe how long in took to figure out how to spell fuggin’ eclair. Damn French Twinkies.

        • Raiser
          Raiser
          September 13, 2012 at 12:27 am | #

          CHOCOLATE-COATED French twinkies.

          …although now I suddenly see where someone could take that as a double-entendre.

          • Luke
            Luke
            September 13, 2012 at 12:33 am | #

            Anything can be taken as a double-entendre; (Thank God you typed that, otherwise the spelling would be all over the damn place) I mean, look at this sentence: “I’m going to sodomize you with a mason jar.” I don’t know how anyone could take that in a sexual way.

            • hmrc4evr
              hmrc4evr
              September 13, 2012 at 3:05 am | #

              Back in high school I knew a guy who was dating a gal who could do that with a mayo jar. Granted the location was different but still it is apparently possible.

  11. Wonder Wig
    Wonder Wig
    September 13, 2012 at 12:05 am | #

    Joyce – “Peace be with you, and an EXTRA piece for you.”

    • Luke
      Luke
      September 13, 2012 at 12:08 am | #

      … I miss Jim Gaffigan.

      • Wonder Wig
        Wonder Wig
        September 13, 2012 at 12:10 am | #

        Holy moses don’t scare me like that. lol

        • Luke
          Luke
          September 13, 2012 at 12:12 am | #

          *Tilts head inquisitively* Scary? Me? Never.

          • Wonder Wig
            Wonder Wig
            September 13, 2012 at 12:24 am | #

            *Huddles in the corner*…. He gonna take my pale man….

            • Luke
              Luke
              September 13, 2012 at 12:27 am | #

              *Grins* Don’t be afraid, little von, I von’t hurt you.

              • Wonder Wig
                Wonder Wig
                September 13, 2012 at 2:49 am | #

                I NEED SEVERAL ADULTS!

  12. hinoteoni
    hinoteoni
    September 13, 2012 at 12:05 am | #

    Awww snap

  13. turnish
    turnish
    September 13, 2012 at 12:05 am | #

    THE TAGS THO

    8( watch out joyce

  14. Ryan Balis
    Ryan Balis
    September 13, 2012 at 12:05 am | #

    God, if you love Joyce, PLEASE TELL HER he’s gay!!!!

  15. Boom
    Boom
    September 13, 2012 at 12:07 am | #

    I think this may end up being her “trapped in light and forced to watch porn videos”.

    • Aizat
      Aizat
      September 13, 2012 at 12:09 am | #

      She loses her memory and then joined the MIB?

      • Boom
        Boom
        September 13, 2012 at 12:13 am | #

        She loses her memory and things get much, much darker.

        “Do you know how I got these scars?”

        • Aizat
          Aizat
          September 13, 2012 at 12:18 am | #

          Her father was a drinker and a fiend?

  16. GenericScreenName101
    GenericScreenName101
    September 13, 2012 at 12:09 am | #

    Abondon ship, abondon ship!! Drama-burg ahead!!

    • GrrArg42
      GrrArg42
      September 13, 2012 at 4:53 am | #

      Lets MOVE people! We are going to need lifeboats! Someone get that girl a straight boyfriend and get that man a Manuel. Mike, we need you on isle despair to pick up the broken pieces and make people eat them. Lets get cracking.

      • Digidestined of Trust (Tim)
        Digidestined of Trust (Tim)
        September 13, 2012 at 1:16 pm | #

        NOOOOOOO! Not the Drama Tag! Anything but that! Must be fixed!

  17. Henry
    Henry
    September 13, 2012 at 12:10 am | #

    Some people go to bars to hit on the opposite sex.
    Joyce goes to church.

    • Aizat
      Aizat
      September 13, 2012 at 12:14 am | #

      Well, they say love can happen anywhere. Even during a funeral.

      • Boom
        Boom
        September 13, 2012 at 12:18 am | #

        This was set at a funeral? Suddenly Mike’s presence makes so much more sense.

        • Yotomoe
          Yotomoe
          September 13, 2012 at 12:26 am | #

          Naw, it couldn’t be. Mike would have a bag of popcorn and his phone on it’s loudest ring setting.

    • Romanticide
      Romanticide
      September 13, 2012 at 1:55 am | #

      So did a huge number of people living in a christian majority… and I think some still do XD

      • Stevie Windup
        Stevie Windup
        September 13, 2012 at 7:51 pm | #

        Well, I wouldn’t say that I hit on them, but that is where I try to find them.

  18. Aizat
    Aizat
    September 13, 2012 at 12:11 am | #

    Mike is going to have a field day after this.

  19. milk experiment
    milk experiment
    September 13, 2012 at 12:12 am | #

    Last-panel Joyce is soooo cute! 😀

    And last-panel Ethan is soooo sadly self-deluding. 🙁

  20. Krashthemystro
    Krashthemystro
    September 13, 2012 at 12:15 am | #

    JOYCE, wrong tree, you are barking up it.

    • Aizat
      Aizat
      September 13, 2012 at 12:22 am | #

      Learning things the hard way: Life’s way of telling you “I enjoy seeing you suffer”.

  21. Kernanator
    Kernanator
    September 13, 2012 at 12:16 am | #

    Haha, tragic.

    • Luke
      Luke
      September 13, 2012 at 12:23 am | #

      I am hilarious and you will quote everything I say.

      • Raiser
        Raiser
        September 13, 2012 at 12:29 am | #

        TWELVE MONTHS HAVE PASSED, let’s go fight Saiyans.

        • SplashBoogie
          SplashBoogie
          September 13, 2012 at 12:38 am | #

          DESTRUCTO DISK

          • Luke
            Luke
            September 13, 2012 at 12:40 am | #

            LAME!

          • Aizat
            Aizat
            September 13, 2012 at 12:43 am | #

            WHY DON’T YOU DOOOOOOOOOOOODGE?

    • Aizat
      Aizat
      September 13, 2012 at 12:24 am | #

      Tragically hilarious.

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        September 13, 2012 at 12:27 am | #

        You now fully understand Dramedy

      • Kernanator
        Kernanator
        September 13, 2012 at 1:06 am | #

        Exactly.

  22. wooskie
    wooskie
    September 13, 2012 at 12:19 am | #

    ethan you can’t possibly be this oblivious…. ETHAN. >:[

    • insomniac
      insomniac
      September 13, 2012 at 12:48 am | #

      Ethan knows what he’s doing. Dude is toying with hardcore denial as a life strategy.

      • begbert2
        begbert2
        September 13, 2012 at 3:56 pm | #

        Knowingly and with malice aforethought! Denial that requires active denial of the fact you’re actively in denial is the best kind of denial.

  23. SplashBoogie
    SplashBoogie
    September 13, 2012 at 12:24 am | #

    This is been a pretty rough two weeks for you eh Joyce…

  24. cdotsq
    cdotsq
    September 13, 2012 at 12:37 am | #

    HOOKING UP IN A CHURCH
    YES?

    • Luke
      Luke
      September 13, 2012 at 12:39 am | #

      Better yet, in Confessional.

      • cdotsq
        cdotsq
        September 13, 2012 at 10:31 pm | #

        So.COTDAMN. hot

  25. Zap
    Zap
    September 13, 2012 at 12:37 am | #

    Oh this cannot end well.

    • Raoullefere
      Raoullefere
      September 13, 2012 at 1:23 am | #

      Actually, it could. It’s just that the in-between parts are going to suck like Robo-Vac.

  26. Leon
    Leon
    September 13, 2012 at 12:41 am | #

    Hoo boy, is this gonna end up in disappointment!

  27. Uniqueantique
    Uniqueantique
    September 13, 2012 at 12:50 am | #

    Guess we can’t post comic copy gravitars anymore. Dang, had a good one too..and it’s morphed into beefcake guy. Okay, back to my kitty and behave myself.

  28. Bekah
    Bekah
    September 13, 2012 at 1:10 am | #

    BAD ETHAN! BAD BAD BAD!

    • Aizat
      Aizat
      September 13, 2012 at 1:16 am | #

      Now go to the corner and think about what you have done.

    • Kernanator
      Kernanator
      September 13, 2012 at 1:59 am | #

      Am I going to have to rub your nose in it?

  29. Aristophanes
    Aristophanes
    September 13, 2012 at 1:17 am | #

    I can’t see anything bad coming from this at ALL

  30. Tandel
    Tandel
    September 13, 2012 at 1:17 am | #

    Master Willis, your ability to take these characters in completely unexpected (but entirely believable) directions never ceases to amaze. Knowing the previous continuity only makes it sweeter. It’ll be a pleasure and privilege to read for another decade.

  31. That one guy
    That one guy
    September 13, 2012 at 1:22 am | #

    So, what’s this alternate universe I keep thinking about, where’s the original universe?

  32. Darth Cariss
    Darth Cariss
    September 13, 2012 at 1:22 am | #

    I like this storyline. I hope it NEVER ENDS.

  33. That one guy
    That one guy
    September 13, 2012 at 1:22 am | #

    Err, alternate universe I keep “hearing” about, not thinking.

  34. Bill
    Bill
    September 13, 2012 at 1:28 am | #

    Finally! I little something something for Joyce. 😉

  35. WaffleMaster
    WaffleMaster
    September 13, 2012 at 1:33 am | #

    Still waiting on the incredibly Accepting and friendly Satanist iot writes itslef i swear!

    • begbert2
      begbert2
      September 13, 2012 at 10:49 am | #

      The spelling, it hurts!

      I think I’m the resident Satanist around here (I mean, aside from completely not being one), so let’s see if I can muster something up here. Let’s see, we have two people talking, no religion being discussed at all, but all the sad cute is -wait, don’t get distracted! Okay, maybe if I focus on that singing in the background, there’s probably something in there that – aw, the cute! The painful cute!

      Try to hold it together people! Try to, try to, try DAWWWWWWWW

  36. Crumplepunch
    Crumplepunch
    September 13, 2012 at 1:37 am | #

    GASP!

    In a church, Joyce?

    For shame.

    • WaffleMaster
      WaffleMaster
      September 13, 2012 at 2:01 am | #

      OH GODS YOU AVATAR!

  37. Jackson
    Jackson
    September 13, 2012 at 1:50 am | #

    ARGH

  38. Ryan
    Ryan
    September 13, 2012 at 1:50 am | #

    OUR GOOOOD IS AN AWESOME GOD HE REEEEIGNS OVER HEAVEN AND EARTH…

    You’re all so, so welcome.

    • Ryan
      Ryan
      September 13, 2012 at 1:52 am | #

      From heaven above. Whatever dudes.

  39. AliaPie
    AliaPie
    September 13, 2012 at 2:13 am | #

    Is Mike still here? I see asshole potential here.

    • Legasher
      Legasher
      September 13, 2012 at 1:57 pm | #

      Of course. This is why he was here in the first place, clearly. Why else would he decide to go to church on this particular day if he didn’t sense an opportunity to use his powers for dubious good.

  40. Wixvhen
    Wixvhen
    September 13, 2012 at 2:26 am | #

    I feel bad. She’s giving an honest to goodness attempt for coupling, but his face has ‘innocent smile’ written all over it. Sans the gray sideburns since this is DoA, not SP.

  41. Aesir
    Aesir
    September 13, 2012 at 3:01 am | #

    Joyce: HEY! I just met you and this is crazy, but LOVE ME! LOVE ME! LOVE ME! LOVE ME! LOVE ME! LOVE ME! LOVE ME!

    • imperator
      imperator
      September 13, 2012 at 3:41 am | #

      Remember Joyce, hand holding will get you pregnant. So repeat after me. “Hey I just met you, and this is craaazy, bit I think I’m pregnant, and its your baby!”

  42. Furie
    Furie
    September 13, 2012 at 4:42 am | #

    Oh no…

  43. Farmer_10
    Farmer_10
    September 13, 2012 at 4:54 am | #

    That boy needs an intervention.

  44. Zaxares
    Zaxares
    September 13, 2012 at 5:49 am | #

    That last panel makes me want to grab Joyce and go commit some sins in a confession box. … Oh wait, wrong religion. XD

  45. James Rye
    James Rye
    September 13, 2012 at 6:07 am | #

    Joyce gonna get so crushed in a couple strips when she finds out the truth about Ethan…

  46. CC
    CC
    September 13, 2012 at 6:36 am | #

    Joyce. Stop that. I ship you and Sal and you are making that difficult right now.

  47. Charles RB
    Charles RB
    September 13, 2012 at 7:56 am | #

    THIS will not end well.

  48. katercanter
    katercanter
    September 13, 2012 at 8:06 am | #

    Ethan, NOOOOOOOOO!
    This can only end in tears.

  49. 'Drew
    'Drew
    September 13, 2012 at 8:11 am | #

    I really hope you’re not going to turn Joyuce into Michelle Bachman and have her try to “Pray the Gay Away.” But then again, if you’re going to redeem her afterward and show how ridiculous that is might not be such a bad idea at all…

  50. Fred Davis
    Fred Davis
    September 13, 2012 at 9:01 am | #

    Don’t hold hands! The slender woman with no eyes feeds on couples!

    • ArkhamTexan
      ArkhamTexan
      September 13, 2012 at 9:51 am | #

      Just don’t think about the Slender Woman. The more you think about her, the more likely she’ll show up behind yo—::COMPUTER SCREEN GOES BLACK, STATIC & DISTORTION::

  51. sarpiedon
    sarpiedon
    September 13, 2012 at 9:46 am | #

    So, we have established that Joyce has no Gaydar…or Jewdar

  52. nimoy
    nimoy
    September 13, 2012 at 9:57 am | #

    Did anyone hear about Joshua Weed, the gay mormon guy who came out and said he is super happy in his heterosexual marriage, enjoys his sex life with his wife, and says that living according to his spiritual principles is more important to him than his sexual orientation? (Sad really, but his choice) I could see something similar happening here with Joyce deciding she would be willing to love and marry him even if he is gay, and Ethan going along with it because he is so desperate for that sort of love and support.

    And then Amber implodes, generating a black hole that destroys the entire universe.

    • Jessica
      Jessica
      September 13, 2012 at 10:12 am | #

      I think you really have to understand mormon culture to understand Josh weed. His story is not unusual. i was raised mormon. Though being gay isn’t considered wrong or having as they call it same gender attration, the acting on the feelings is. The justifications are many, but all stupid. but you haev to remember we are rasied to belive that the family is the most important thing you can ever have… to not be able to have that family.. would be heartbreaking. that said he was so brave to come out of the closet, stupidity can run deep in some comunities… social suicide by mormons and the lgbt community

    • Jay Carr
      Jay Carr
      September 13, 2012 at 10:40 am | #

      I think what Joshua did takes a serious amount of determination and time (as I recall it took him years to find a woman that worked on any level for him, and time still hasn’t told us if, even after all that effort, the marriage will stick. Good luck to him though, so long as he’s doing it for his own reasons/beliefs and not someone else’s…)

      Anyway, I have serious doubts Ethan is in that sort of stat of mind. Would he like a relationship? Sure. Is he psychologically dominated by a theological conception that eternal happiness can only be found through heterosexual marriage? …uh, I’m going with “not so much”. I doubt Ethan feels terribly motivated to overcome something he doesn’t really see as a problem (or hasn’t seen as a problem in SP.)

      Personally, I don’t think this can work. Ethan has never shown himself to be even remotely bi… Yeah, I agree with most everyone here, this can only end in tears.

    • Martigro
      Martigro
      September 13, 2012 at 11:18 am | #

      Choice must be respected, yes, but when examples like that are championed as a way of saying “See, you CAN deny your true self and live a kind-of-happy life by sticking to the principles you were raised into instead of your sexuality” it makes me want to punch people.

      Denying who you are in favor of pleasing a small-minded community should be something that makes said community wonder what the hell it is doing wrong, not celebrated.

      Also: NO, ETHAN, NO

      • cwDeici
        cwDeici
        September 20, 2012 at 11:22 am | #

        The person is also the community, as the community are the individuals.

  53. Rob
    Rob
    September 13, 2012 at 10:35 am | #

    Oh, honey.

  54. nobbidy
    nobbidy
    September 13, 2012 at 12:24 pm | #

    Hey, now it sounds like you guys are type casting Ethan. Just because he is supposed to be gay, doesn’t mean he has to come out and be gay the way you guys think he is supposed to. If he wants to hold on to this sense of normalcy he has right now, dont think he has to completely drop who he is and automatically start humping all the guys.

    It dont work like that.

  55. John Harmon
    John Harmon
    September 13, 2012 at 12:43 pm | #

    If god has a plan for all of us, then how, in essence, can we have free will?

    • AJBulldis
      AJBulldis
      September 13, 2012 at 12:44 pm | #

      We can choose not to follow it, for starters.

      • David
        David M Willis
        September 13, 2012 at 1:07 pm | #

        But then THAT was god’s plan! No matter what you do, it was God’s plan.

        It kind of has to be. Because let’s say that somebody subvert’s God’s plan and does the opposite of what he wanted. You don’t live in a vacuum. Your choices affect other people. And so your subversion of God’s plan will inevitably cause havoc with God’s plans for other people. It can’t possibly be that God’s plan for other people won’t be an option for those people because another person made a wayward decision that removed it from possibility, so it must have always been God’s plan for …
        …

        …and I’ve gone crosseyed

        • ASmellyOgre
          ASmellyOgre
          September 13, 2012 at 1:53 pm | #

          lol, that reminds me of when I first heard of Calvinism. My brain never quite recovered from the attempt to understand those beliefs. :psyduck:

          • Raoullefere
            Raoullefere
            September 13, 2012 at 5:31 pm | #

            Neither have theirs.

        • Zitseidu
          Zitseidu
          September 13, 2012 at 3:05 pm | #

          Or, God intervenes as necessary to ensure his plan is not thrown off course by people going against his plan. Small things and such, rather than spectacular miracles. Making sure you remember something you forgot, causing you to change your course before disaster strikes, good ol’ fasioned poetic justice for those fighting his plan, etc. Much simpler than your idea. 😛

          • Zitseidu
            Zitseidu
            September 13, 2012 at 3:09 pm | #

            Oh, I’m the atheist today? Irony instead of Poetic Justice, got it.

          • begbert2
            begbert2
            September 13, 2012 at 3:42 pm | #

            “Causing you to change your course”? Whoops; there goes free will. (Free will when your ability to choose otherwise is removed is not free will.)

            • Stevie Windup
              Stevie Windup
              September 13, 2012 at 8:04 pm | #

              Giving you the opportunity to change your course, however, is.

              • begbert2
                begbert2
                September 13, 2012 at 8:53 pm | #

                If by that you meant that people still have the option to ignore the ‘opportunity’ and continue to be a monkey wrench in the plan, then the plan has been buried by a mountainous pile of monkey wrenches by now.

                I mean, the word ‘plan’ implies that there’s a sequence of events that is supposed to happen. If one of these events doesn’t happen, then the plan is off the rails. And as Willis pointed out, this will tend to have a snowball effect – the rogue element will knock other elements off track, which will themselves then be off-plan, whether they like it or not. The butterfly effect applies here; the smallest changes will have escalating effects as often as they don’t. Hitler decides to be a painter instead, and *piles* of history is noticeably different.

                Additional vulnerability is introduced by the fact that people say that *everything* is part of God’s plan, and that his plan is supposedly having deliberate specific effects on billions of places in trillions upon trillions of moments in continuous succession. This is a plan that deals in minutia – if I decide to go buy chips and get in a wreck, the survivors will be telling themselves that the event and it’s aftermath was part of god’s plan. Does this mean that I don’t even choose whether or not I feel like a snack is God manipulating me? Did he force me to be in that place at that time? According to the bereaved, yes. So, bye-bye free will.

                Though frankly, free will is a fleeting commodity when you’ve got a God around. If you want to obliterate it even faster, have a god that can predict the future with certainty, without having to resort to intervention to force his predictions to come true. True precognition disproves free will* absolutely, without even having bringing a plan into it.

                * Libertarian free will, that is. Which is to say, the kind of free will everyone means when they say “free will”.

          • Luke
            Luke
            September 13, 2012 at 9:05 pm | #

            I think God does very little in our lives, but wishes the best for us. He probably put the ‘Big Bang’ into action and let evolution and such run its course. Kind of why I find it ironic when some Atheist call the religious people ignorant, while it’s just as ignorant to believe with no shadow of a doubt that there was absolutely no higher power. With this unending universe and such, anything is possible, and to put the idea of God out of any realm of possibility in their minds is ridiculous. I myself probably border Agnosticism and Christianity; believing in the religion, but also understanding that there is no true way to know for certain. Guess I’m done with this rant, if you can call it that.

            • David
              David M Willis
              September 13, 2012 at 10:15 pm | #

              People are atheistic about all kinds of stuff. I’m an atheist about unicorns. I’m pretty sure they don’t exist and never did. I’m an atheist about an invisible puma who is said to be hiding behind my chair, growling at a frequency humans can’t hear. Would you tell someone who said they were 100% sure that there wasn’t an invisible puma behind them that they’re ignorant? Or are they just being pragmatic?

              Besides, a god who does so little that we can’t tell that he exists may as well be a god who doesn’t exist at all. He is irrelevant to existence, which is basically the same thing.

              ….and why does your gravatar include the Confederate flag…?

            • begbert2
              begbert2
              September 14, 2012 at 12:19 am | #

              Hollywood tells us that atheists are 100% certain that there’s nothing that could be called a god, but that’s actually not how it works. Atheism is a strange hybrid of simplicity and complexity: it’s simple in that we just don’t believe in anything that could reasonably called a god; it’s complex because (whether we like it or not) it’s a reactionary belief system; it’s always defined in contrast to existing religions, because they are the source of the definitions of the gods we don’t believe in – and there are a lot of different definitions. Some we are more certain of than others.

              For example, a lot of Christianity speaks of a god that is claimed to have done lots of things that simply didn’t happen: creationism; a worldwide flood, something with Jews enslaved in egypt and a drowned pharoah, and so on. A god who is defined as having done that, never existed. We can be 100% certain – or at least as certain as we are that all of history and all of science isn’t a total lie. Same as we know there aren’t herds of unicorns roaming Africa leaving bones and stool and photo ops everywhere.

              Now, Deist gods like the one you speak of, they’re harder to disprove; impossible actually. But on the other hand, why should we care about them? They do nothing for us, and as best we can tell, never did. Humanity gets as much benefit from Frodo and Harry Potter. They’re all the same to me – though personally the protagonists of those stories strike me as much, much nicer people than the biblical god. (Debatably including ring-possessed Frodo.) And if I’m not going to believe in them, why waste time on some nebulous, poorly defined Mary-Sue fantasy?

              • lordphulish
                lordphulish
                September 14, 2012 at 4:40 am | #

                Just because something didn’t happen doesn’t mean that it isn’t true.

                • begbert2
                  begbert2
                  September 14, 2012 at 10:36 am | #

                  (Checks dictionary) Yes it does.

    • John Harmon
      John Harmon
      September 14, 2012 at 1:18 am | #

      It’s fun seeing people try and rationalize a paradox.

  56. Ray
    Ray
    September 13, 2012 at 2:55 pm | #

    What’s the old saying? All the good men are taken or gay?

    • DudeMyDadOwnsADealership
      DudeMyDadOwnsADealership
      September 13, 2012 at 10:52 pm | #

      Yep. Another one is “You’ll have to date a lot of frogs before you find your prince.”

      Joyce is on her way to learning what the second one is all about. First date was a horn dog. This one here is in the closet because Christopher Robin isn’t around anymore, so he now has to learn how to get his own damn head out of the honey pot. This is LIFE, Joyce Brown, and like the song says, you can’t hurry love.

      • begbert2
        begbert2
        September 14, 2012 at 10:37 am | #

        You skipped #2, the rapist.

  57. Arturo
    Arturo
    September 13, 2012 at 5:49 pm | #

    Will somebody please lend that girl their gaydar? I’d lend mine but I think it’s broken. All it shows is where Kirk Cameron is at any given moment.

    • David
      David M Willis
      September 13, 2012 at 6:03 pm | #

      hahaha

    • lordphulish
      lordphulish
      September 14, 2012 at 4:38 am | #

      Probably filming another Left Behind movie

  58. Slipdance
    Slipdance
    September 13, 2012 at 8:30 pm | #

    “Joyce, I’ve never felt this way about a girl before. I feel we have so much in common. I know you’re looking for a good man…”
    “Oh, Ethan….”
    “…and so am I! SO much in common!”

  59. Portgas D. Ace
    Portgas D. Ace
    September 13, 2012 at 10:34 pm | #

    I can safely say, Joyce is going to get quite the shock soon…

    • Marshall Erickson
      Marshall Erickson
      September 14, 2012 at 9:15 am | #

      It’ll be soooo fun to see.

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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
y'know there's not an awful lot of rocketeering in The Rocketeer
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dril.bsky.social's user avatar
wint @dril.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
buddy you came to the wrong ass to fuck
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
Man if they were arresting judges then this'd be the dumbest fucking thing I've ever heard but thankfully that's not happening.
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damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
Stop making the one toy I want the super-expensive chase, Auldey!!!!
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
And that's why you have Jesus wear a condom!
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David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
It's #webcomicday? We have a special day??? Well, my name is Pat McHoarney and I draw 69 Mouse-Ear Blvd, a multigenerational story about women who all have sexy legs and probably other features. There was a grandmother, but she wasn't hot and so she died off-panel.
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bsweet.bsky.social's user avatar
hoanna newsom @bsweet.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
nytimes.com's user avatarThe New York Times @nytimes.com ⋅ 5d
Elizabeth Holmes is in prison for defrauding investors through her blood-testing company, Theranos. Her partner, Billy Evans, is now trying to raise money for a company that describes itself as “the future of diagnostics.” nyti.ms/3FbtZm9
Elizabeth Holmes and Billy Evans, sitting closely on a couch. A headline reads:
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chrismcfeely.bsky.social's user avatar
Chris McFeely @chrismcfeely.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
That's the most upsetting LEGO Thing minifig possible
preternia.com's user avatarpreternia @preternia.com ⋅ 3d
LEGO Marvel Studios The Fantastic Four: First Steps Fantastic Four vs. Galactus will release June 1st ($59.99) - bit.ly/3F4uRci #ad
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damnyouwillis.bsky.social's user avatar
David M Willis! @damnyouwillis.bsky.social ⋅ 3d
what's going on with tariffs right now i dunno, what time is it today
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