Dumbing of Age Book Twelve

Dumbing of Age

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June 1, 2026

Availability

by David M Willis on January 7, 2013 at 12:01 am
  • 01 - If the Shoe Splits
└ Tags: jason, penny, sal

Discussion (135) ¬

[ Comments RSS ]
  1. blackaeon
    blackaeon
    January 7, 2013 at 12:03 am | #

    WITH TATTOOS!

    • Aizat
      Aizat
      January 7, 2013 at 1:00 am | #

      WITH A BOX OF SCRAPS!

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        January 7, 2013 at 1:05 am | #

        FOR SCIENCE!

        • Aizat
          Aizat
          January 7, 2013 at 1:44 am | #

          FOR FREEDOM!

          • Plasma Mongoose
            Plasma Mongoose
            January 7, 2013 at 1:47 am | #

            EXCELSIOR!

            • DaJoshMaster
              DaJoshMaster
              January 7, 2013 at 2:03 am | #

              FOR PONY!

              • Plasma Mongoose
                Plasma Mongoose
                January 7, 2013 at 3:30 am | #

                TO INFINITY AND BEYOND THE IMPOSSIBLE!

                • Fred
                  Fred
                  January 7, 2013 at 7:57 am | #

                  FOR A NICKEL!

                • N0083rP00F
                  N0083rP00F
                  January 7, 2013 at 3:39 pm | #

                  At The Speed of LINT!

                • JA
                  JA
                  January 7, 2013 at 6:59 pm | #

                  FAAAAAAAACCCEEE

                • petsinwinter
                  petsinwinter
                  January 8, 2013 at 9:50 pm | #

                  SPAAAAAAAAAAAAAACE

                • NightmareWarden
                  NightmareWarden
                  July 4, 2013 at 8:51 pm | #

                  SPOOOOOOON!

                • fatemaster1
                  fatemaster1
                  June 22, 2014 at 11:32 pm | #

                  For no reason!

                • Aisling
                  Aisling
                  June 6, 2015 at 1:54 pm | #

                  SPOOOOOOOOOON!!!

              • The Other Mike
                The Other Mike
                January 30, 2015 at 5:54 am | #

                DaJoshMaster, your comment is much more amusing when read in Penny’s voice. (The Penny in your avatar, that is, not the one in the strip.)

      • Icalasari
        Icalasari
        January 7, 2013 at 2:34 am | #

        In the faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaace?

        • Portmaneau
          Portmaneau
          January 7, 2013 at 1:31 pm | #

          with a %$^* in the box

      • Volkai
        Volkai
        January 8, 2013 at 1:56 pm | #

        Jason is now A BOX OF SCRAPS!

  2. David Herbert
    David Herbert
    January 7, 2013 at 12:03 am | #

    Her tattoos give her super strength.

    • NCP19
      NCP19
      January 7, 2013 at 12:06 am | #

      I’m glad someone said it. Also her voice probably doesn’t hurt either.

    • Zeptometer
      Zeptometer
      January 7, 2013 at 12:13 am | #

      Her voice gives her super strength.

      (Anyone?)

      • Sir Robin
        Sir Robin
        January 7, 2013 at 12:15 am | #

        Sal sounds like Applejack

        • Doctor_Who
          Doctor_Who
          January 7, 2013 at 12:28 am | #

          Yes. I cannot hear any voice when she speaks except for Ashleigh Ball.

        • Jackson
          Jackson
          January 7, 2013 at 12:53 am | #

          FRIENDSHIIIIP is magic

          • Aizat
            Aizat
            January 7, 2013 at 1:34 am | #

            Don’t you mean DRAGGING is magic?

            • DaJoshMaster
              DaJoshMaster
              January 7, 2013 at 2:12 am | #

              Your Mum’s magic… for a nickel!

              • Aizat
                Aizat
                January 7, 2013 at 2:17 am | #

                You know who else like magic?

                • DaJoshMaster
                  DaJoshMaster
                  January 7, 2013 at 2:24 am | #

                  Hitler.

                • Plasma Mongoose
                  Plasma Mongoose
                  January 7, 2013 at 3:32 am | #

                  Hitler, Adolf Hitler…

        • DudeMyDadOwnsADealership
          DudeMyDadOwnsADealership
          January 7, 2013 at 1:48 pm | #

          Applejack has a much bigger vocabulary and, I think, speaks at a faster rate. I think Rogue from X-men Evolution is closer.

      • Plasma Mongoose
        Plasma Mongoose
        January 7, 2013 at 12:24 am | #

        If Sal sounds anything like YGO Abridged’s Tristan, she might end up staying a virgin for a very long time.

      • fatemaster1
        fatemaster1
        June 22, 2014 at 11:40 pm | #

        She’s a ninja, it’s part of the training that we get super strength without having bulging muscles, essentially just denser muscles so we can still keep up our speed.

    • Bill M.
      Bill M.
      January 7, 2013 at 2:47 pm | #

      So… she’s a runelord?

      • KaelemGaen
        KaelemGaen
        April 8, 2013 at 10:00 am | #

        Just had to comment on this just to say +1 Good Sir.

    • sidhe3141
      sidhe3141
      March 7, 2013 at 4:58 am | #

      Bellflower Tattoo. I didn’t think she was Lawful enough to qualify for that prestige class, though.

  3. DaJoshMaster
    DaJoshMaster
    January 7, 2013 at 12:03 am | #

    Okay Jason, I’m jelly.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      January 7, 2013 at 12:06 am | #

      What flavour? 😀

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        January 7, 2013 at 12:16 am | #

        Plasma, the quickest draw on the gravitars.

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          January 7, 2013 at 12:20 am | #

          I’m slowly getting the hang of the Corel PHOTO-PAINT X5.

      • Dibullba
        Dibullba
        January 8, 2013 at 3:09 am | #

        Pie Flavor!!!

        • fatemaster1
          fatemaster1
          June 22, 2014 at 11:41 pm | #

          Cherry Pie Flavor!

  4. Doctor_Who
    Doctor_Who
    January 7, 2013 at 12:04 am | #

    Sal’s power comes from tattoos? She must be one of the Rakyat from Far Cry 3!

    …Ma, those pirates wouldn’t stand a chance against a pissed off Sal.

    • Kernanator
      Kernanator
      January 7, 2013 at 12:32 am | #

      Or the Nameless One.

      • Aizat
        Aizat
        January 7, 2013 at 12:53 am | #

        Or a ghost.

    • AckAckAck
      AckAckAck
      January 7, 2013 at 3:59 pm | #

      Uh…. actually Rakyat means Civilians.

      Those people who made FC3 love to throw ambiguous foreign words to make it sounds cooler.

  5. Wonder Wig
    Wonder Wig
    January 7, 2013 at 12:04 am | #

    Tattoos are like equip magic cards. They boost the targets original power.

    • DaJoshMaster
      DaJoshMaster
      January 7, 2013 at 1:13 am | #

      You can channel some mana to move them onto other creatures?
      They die to artifact removal?

      Tattos just got so much cooler.

    • AckAckAck
      AckAckAck
      January 7, 2013 at 4:00 pm | #

      So what’s the tramp stamp tattoos power?

  6. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    January 7, 2013 at 12:04 am | #

    Tattoos which magically give you a +6 bonus to your STR stat.

    • Aizat
      Aizat
      January 7, 2013 at 1:08 am | #

      That would be the Fighter’s Tattoo.

      • GrrArg42
        GrrArg42
        January 7, 2013 at 1:23 am | #

        I know I shouldn’t have gotten this Banjo tattoo.

        … wait what am I saying? Of course I should. I’ma going to get a matching one. They can be friends!

        • Aizat
          Aizat
          January 7, 2013 at 1:35 am | #

          Let me see, Banjo Tattoo gives you +5 on any musical based attacks.

        • Ancestral Hamster
          Ancestral Hamster
          January 7, 2013 at 1:56 am | #

          Get a Banthulhlu tattoo!

          “That is not Dead that can Eternal lie,
          And over Strange Aeons even Death may die.”

          • Aizat
            Aizat
            January 7, 2013 at 2:15 am | #

            Or the Dragon Tattoo. +5 on all stats plus a 50% to all elemental magic.

            • AckAckAck
              AckAckAck
              January 7, 2013 at 4:04 pm | #

              But becareful, a wrong design and it will raise your douche meter to +5!

      • Rokku
        Rokku
        January 7, 2013 at 6:51 am | #

        WHY HASN’T TORMENT GOTTEN AN HD REMIX YET

        • Animaniac
          Animaniac
          January 10, 2013 at 3:45 am | #

          because they are working on the sequel instead?
          http://arstechnica.com/gaming/2012/12/planescape-torment-sequel-finally-in-the-works/

  7. Reboot
    Reboot
    January 7, 2013 at 12:07 am | #

    If Penny’s actually meant to be English (or, hell, from ANYWHERE in the British Isles), she would say “maths”, not “math”.

    • DaJoshMaster
      DaJoshMaster
      January 7, 2013 at 12:11 am | #

      Yeah, that’s really bugging me too. 😛

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      January 7, 2013 at 12:12 am | #

      Maybe she has started to use American spelling and words after being in the country for a fair while, after all even Arnold Schwarzenegger HAS to work with a speech coach so he can KEEP his accent, otherwise he would just sound like a typical Hollywood American.

      • Doctor_Who
        Doctor_Who
        January 7, 2013 at 12:17 am | #

        I always wondered how he kept the accent after so many years. I always figured that at some point he just started doing the same Ahnold impression that everyone else does, and we never noticed the difference.

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          January 7, 2013 at 12:36 am | #

          His voice is pretty much his trademark, so it is in his best interest to keep it.

        • Whittier
          Whittier
          January 7, 2013 at 11:52 am | #

          I know British folk who have lived in the US for years who sound exactly like Americans, and ones who have lived in the US for years whom Americans think sound British (though British think they sound Australian). Personality quirks, I think, have something to do with how much on assimilates an accent. I say this having had linguists “diagnose” my own accent as a mishmash of everything I’ve ever herad.

          • TARDIS with a Hat
            TARDIS with a Hat
            January 7, 2013 at 3:36 pm | #

            My late grandmother kept her German accent all her life, even though she came to Israel in a rather young age.

      • Cholma
        Cholma
        January 7, 2013 at 12:18 am | #

        That accent is fake. The speech coach is so he doesn’t forget his public persona. In private he speaks more like this: “I say, I shall return. Good day, ol’ chap.” He’s not Austrian at all! 😀

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        January 7, 2013 at 12:20 am | #

        And noone wants that.

      • Somebody
        Somebody
        January 8, 2013 at 1:37 pm | #

        That doesn’t make sense…accents are not that easy to lose.

    • jnzooger
      jnzooger
      January 7, 2013 at 12:45 am | #

      I actually called this a few comic back infact. I knew someone would say it wrong eventually.

  8. Mkvenner
    Mkvenner
    January 7, 2013 at 12:10 am | #

    Its the bowtie.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      January 7, 2013 at 12:17 am | #

      It spins around and makes anyone looking at it get all sleepy.

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        January 7, 2013 at 12:21 am | #

        Hypnotizes them into thinking it was a great night of sex and debauchery when really we just watched Monty Python in our underwear.

        • Plasma Mongoose
          Plasma Mongoose
          January 7, 2013 at 12:39 am | #

          Are you suggesting that Monty Python < sex and debauchery?

          • Resne
            Resne
            January 7, 2013 at 4:28 am | #

            It certainly couldn’t hurt to do them both at once.

  9. Dierna
    Dierna
    January 7, 2013 at 12:12 am | #

    When in your proper element? So…the Tardis?

    • GrrArg42
      GrrArg42
      January 7, 2013 at 1:24 am | #

      I’m sorry, the correct answer was “Boron”.

      • N0083rP00F
        N0083rP00F
        January 7, 2013 at 3:44 pm | #

        Sorry but you must phrase your answer as a question.

      • Dibullba
        Dibullba
        January 8, 2013 at 3:14 am | #

        That is also incorrect. It is the Element of Generosity.

  10. Cholma
    Cholma
    January 7, 2013 at 12:16 am | #

    …and that’s when Sal realized that she was emotionally available… for Penny. Their loud, raucous, nights of passion would become legend across the campus.

    • Plasma Mongoose
      Plasma Mongoose
      January 7, 2013 at 12:18 am | #

      So the Penny/Sal ship is a speedboat with multiple two stroke engines?

      • Yotomoe
        Yotomoe
        January 7, 2013 at 12:24 am | #

        It’s so fast that it goes around the world and crashes into itself.

        • GrrArg42
          GrrArg42
          January 7, 2013 at 1:25 am | #

          Does that make time go backwards?

          • N0083rP00F
            N0083rP00F
            January 7, 2013 at 3:46 pm | #

            No, that makes time go asymmetrically since its all wibbly wobly to begin with.

  11. Uniqueantique
    Uniqueantique
    January 7, 2013 at 12:16 am | #

    I’m a 5′ tall 100 lb. female and in my younger days, I’ve faced down guys 6′. It’s not in the tatoo or the size – it is all in the attitude.
    I tell ’em lay off or I’m going to kill them, and they believe me.
    So I can see where Jason is at: rofl

    • Doctor_Who
      Doctor_Who
      January 7, 2013 at 12:20 am | #

      I actually had a high school friend tell me that the reason no one ever picked on me is that I somehow give off the impression that I’m grinning and holding up a knife at all times.

      So I guess I just give off crazy vibes somehow. Yay?

      • Kernanator
        Kernanator
        January 7, 2013 at 12:30 am | #

        Lucky. I have to grow out my facial hair and stop showering to give off that same effect.

        • DaJoshMaster
          DaJoshMaster
          January 7, 2013 at 12:40 am | #

          Personally I just grin and hold a knife up at all times, it works wonders.

        • Historyman68
          Historyman68
          January 7, 2013 at 11:46 am | #

          I’ve been doing that for a while, and everybody still seems to think i’m a nice guy!

  12. Kernanator
    Kernanator
    January 7, 2013 at 12:24 am | #

    I’m not seeing the Symbol of Torment anywhere on her, Jason, so you don’t have any excuses.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      January 7, 2013 at 12:28 am | #

      I don’t even see an anchor or a heart that says mom.

      • Aizat
        Aizat
        January 7, 2013 at 12:54 am | #

        Or upside down heart that says wow.

  13. Tom Speelman
    Tom Speelman
    January 7, 2013 at 12:37 am | #

    Sure you’re a force, Jason. SURE you are.

    • Aizat
      Aizat
      January 7, 2013 at 12:48 am | #

      Hey, it’s the stick you should be watching out for.

      • addude
        addude
        January 7, 2013 at 2:36 am | #

        Remember what Roosevelt said speak quietly and carry a big stick. He speaks quietly so I’m assuming he has a big stick

        • Xydux
          Xydux
          January 7, 2013 at 11:53 am | #

          I speak quietly. I don’t have a big stick. Maybe I should start yelling.

          • CWR
            CWR
            January 8, 2013 at 3:21 am | #

            Yelling basically tells everyone that your stick isn’t very big.

            I guess.

            In this context.

  14. Plasma Mongoose
    Plasma Mongoose
    January 7, 2013 at 12:44 am | #

    Somehow I have a hard time picturing Jason as a pimpdaddy.

  15. Aizat
    Aizat
    January 7, 2013 at 12:47 am | #

    Wait, Jason was hammering the nail with Penny?

    • DaJoshMaster
      DaJoshMaster
      January 7, 2013 at 1:01 am | #

      Yup, he was tonking her right up the skidaddle.

      • Aizat
        Aizat
        January 7, 2013 at 1:43 am | #

        I can’t believe Jason was painting the fence with Penny.

        • DaJoshMaster
          DaJoshMaster
          January 7, 2013 at 2:00 am | #

          I bet he varnished her table while they were at it.

          • Aizat
            Aizat
            January 7, 2013 at 2:11 am | #

            And polish her mirror.

            • DaJoshMaster
              DaJoshMaster
              January 7, 2013 at 2:23 am | #

              I hope she at least made his bed.

              • Dicrel Seijin
                Dicrel Seijin
                January 7, 2013 at 4:34 am | #

                She offered him a tuppenny-upright.

                • Bill M.
                  Bill M.
                  January 7, 2013 at 2:50 pm | #

                  They were engaged in the rarest of activities, coitus-uninterruptus.

  16. Aizat
    Aizat
    January 7, 2013 at 12:51 am | #

    Tattoos? I hope Sal is not ghost.

  17. Mkvenner
    Mkvenner
    January 7, 2013 at 1:27 am | #

    I get the feeling that there is only one desk in that office, and that jason and penny destroyed the othe one in advertenly.

    • Aizat
      Aizat
      January 7, 2013 at 1:36 am | #

      Talk about pounding the stake.

  18. Joe H
    Joe H
    January 7, 2013 at 1:50 am | #

    I wish I were being dragged around by a girl with tattoos.

    • Yotomoe
      Yotomoe
      January 7, 2013 at 6:58 am | #

      The girl with the Draggin’ Tattoos.

      • J-Dawg
        J-Dawg
        January 7, 2013 at 9:04 am | #

        You beat me to it. Good job!

  19. Barabajagala
    Barabajagala
    January 7, 2013 at 1:52 am | #

    Kinky

    • that bard
      that bard
      January 7, 2013 at 2:27 am | #

      Sorry, but it just feels wrong for Calvin to “say” that.

  20. Raoullefere
    Raoullefere
    January 7, 2013 at 1:59 am | #

    My god, now I feel sorry for… Penny.

  21. DaJoshMaster
    DaJoshMaster
    January 7, 2013 at 2:08 am | #

    I would love to hear Penny and Jason talk dirty.

    • Aizat
      Aizat
      January 7, 2013 at 2:12 am | #

      It will be repeat of Fridays storm of euphemisms.

  22. ItsaMe
    ItsaMe
    January 7, 2013 at 2:45 am | #

    Maths. Oh, you silly brits.

  23. Tim
    Tim
    January 7, 2013 at 2:54 am | #

    Is Jason the reason Penny turns evil? (Assuming she is evil in this universe)

  24. Groove
    Groove
    January 7, 2013 at 4:03 am | #

    With her eyes shut Penny looks sickeningly like the great Faz.

    Jason looks a lot less like Faz with his long face, but he IS talking about his awesome sexual prowess. Also he’s a maths teacher, so he could draw a sick graph depicting sexuality over time(/ladies).

  25. Bill Murphy
    Bill Murphy
    January 7, 2013 at 4:04 am | #

    You have to watch out for those tattoo’d ladies man. 😛

  26. Jimmy
    Jimmy
    January 7, 2013 at 6:33 am | #

    Tattoos must be quite powerful. I have none, so maybe that’s why I can’t lift anything heavier than a bowling ball. 🙂

  27. Yotomoe
    Yotomoe
    January 7, 2013 at 7:01 am | #

    What you guys don’t know is that when Sal gets mad her tattoo spreads across her entire body and also hands grow out of her back.

  28. Ronnie
    Ronnie
    January 7, 2013 at 8:59 am | #

    …WHY am I getting Niles/Daphne vibes from Jason and Penny?

    • Jessie
      Jessie
      January 7, 2013 at 1:13 pm | #

      YOU NAILED IT!!!

      • John
        John
        January 7, 2013 at 2:13 pm | #

        No, apparently Jason did.

        • Roborat
          Roborat
          January 7, 2013 at 3:24 pm | #

          Badum, tish.

  29. Nerdman
    Nerdman
    January 7, 2013 at 11:55 am | #

    Gone for a week, and you miss the most fascinating stuff.

    Like Penny showing up. And Jason proclaiming that he knows “The Sexual Force.”

    Weird.

  30. Yarrr
    Yarrr
    January 7, 2013 at 3:10 pm | #

    It’s the english accent. For some reason I assume he has one.

  31. Ray
    Ray
    January 7, 2013 at 3:18 pm | #

    So, what’s being implied here? That Penny had a thing for Jason, slept with him, and only after that discovered what a bore he is, and now her feelings for him are reduced to bitter snark?

    • CWR
      CWR
      January 8, 2013 at 3:33 am | #

      I think Penny still HAS a thing for Jason – but he was like Dorothy and she was like Danny sort of thing.

      • Raoullefere
        Raoullefere
        January 9, 2013 at 10:17 am | #

        That’s my take, too.

  32. mouseanderson
    mouseanderson
    January 7, 2013 at 3:27 pm | #

    He is being dragged around because tatoos add +5 to strength and to intimidation.

    • N0083rP00F
      N0083rP00F
      January 7, 2013 at 3:51 pm | #

      Well Intimidation is strength based skill.

  33. Somebody
    Somebody
    January 7, 2013 at 4:30 pm | #

    The redhead is ridiculously hot!

    • Mkvenner
      Mkvenner
      January 8, 2013 at 2:24 am | #

      Second.

      • averystrangeplace
        averystrangeplace
        January 14, 2013 at 9:09 am | #

        All in favour, say ai!
        Ai.

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